No Fear: Fear of Commitment | TBN

No Fear: Fear of Commitment

Watch No Fear: Fear of Commitment
May 24, 2020
27:29

Ed Young creatively presents inspirational and biblical truth for every area of life.

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No Fear: Fear of Commitment

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  • Ed Young: The church should bethe most creative entity
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  • in the world.
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  • The church is where it happens.
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  • The church is where we findpurpose, and meaning, and power.
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  • The church is a living,breathing body of Christ.
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  • Wisdom, though, is seeing lifethrough the perspective of God.
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  • You've never locked eyeswith someone that Jesus did not
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  • die for.
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  • Ed Young: Thanks for tuningin to Ed Young Television.
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  • The next 27 minutes and 30seconds will change your life.
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  • We're going to open God's Wordand teach you some things
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  • about what it means to liveon the rugged plains of reality
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  • as we walk in concertwith Jesus.
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  • Hey, thanks for watching.
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  • Thanks for your generosity.
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  • Check this out because it willcause a seismic shift to take
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  • place in your life.
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  • Watch this.
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  • Ed Young: Well, today we wrapup our series on fear.
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  • Fear is something that we alldeal with.
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  • There's some toxic fear, thenalso last time we discovered why
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  • there's one fear we should haveconstant in our lives.
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  • Today, I'm talkin'about the fear of something that
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  • is unusual, because when I talkabout this fear, we tend to run
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  • from this fear.
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  • And when we run from this fear,we think by running from it,
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  • it'll gain intimacy, and trust,and joy, and happiness in our
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  • lives when we flee from it.
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  • In reality though, when we facethis fear, that's when we
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  • discover what trust,and intimacy, and love,
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  • and purpose, and power is allabout.
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  • Well, what am I talkin' about?
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  • Well, this morning I decidedto go out to my swimming pool,
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  • which I do regularly, about, Idon't know, four or five times
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  • a week, and practice casting.
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  • Here's what happened.
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  • This was just several hours ago.
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  • [barking]
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  • That's our dog Level.
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  • We adopted him.
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  • Well, we really rescued himfrom the streets.
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  • And he's been attackedby a coyote.
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  • He has half of an ear.
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  • He's been bittenby a copperhead.
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  • He survived it.
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  • He's tough.
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  • He's tenacious.
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  • Level is all in.
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  • The other dogs were just contentto hang around the edge,
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  • and bark, and circle.
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  • Level, though, is all in.
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  • That's what I'm talkin'about today.
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  • I'm talkin' about the fearof going all in.
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  • The fear of that ten-letter wordthat we struggle with, that our
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  • society applauds when we dothe opposite, "commitment."
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  • Our culture, though, applauds,don't we, our lack
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  • of commitment?
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  • From month to month apartmentleases, to free agency
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  • in athletics, to escape clausesin contracts, to prenuptial
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  • agreements, most of us have thatexcuse-making, work-faking,
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  • vow-forgetting, job-quittingmentality that bolts
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  • from commitment.
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  • Commitment?
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  • Whoa, I wanna keep my optionsopen.
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  • Commitment?
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  • I don't wanna be hemmed in.
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  • Commitment?
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  • What if something or someonebetter comes along?
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  • I'm not gonna really commit.
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  • Fear.
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  • Fear.The fear of commitment.
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  • Fear, F-E-A-R, could bea frantic effort to avoid
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  • reality.
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  • I don't wanna--I don't wannacommit.
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  • I don't want to commit.
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  • I want to just live in limbo,in purgatory.
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  • Commitment, we're gonnadiscover, starts with God.
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  • So think about it.
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  • In the areas of your life thatmatter, are you just barking
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  • around the edge and the ledgeof the pool or are you
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  • like Level?
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  • Are you all in?
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  • Are you fully committed?
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  • The Bible says in Psalm 37:5,"Commit your way to the Lord
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  • Trust also in him and hewill do it."
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  • As I've said many times before,if we have an attorney
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  • in the house, we could sue Nikebecause God said, "Just do it,"
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  • thousands of years before Nikeever coined the phrase.
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  • Maybe there's a lawsuit here.
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  • I don't know.
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  • The Bible says, though, "Commityour way," that's the totality
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  • of who you are, "to the Lord."
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  • Commit your way to the Lord.
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  • Trust in him.
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  • God, you're God, I'm not.
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  • Commitment starts with you and,God, you will do it.
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  • So God's commitment, check thisout, is on tap 24/7.
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  • So to understand what life isabout, it's about that
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  • ten-letter word that we fear,"commitment."
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  • Commitment, what does it mean?
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  • Commitment means to pledgeyourself to a stance no matter
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  • what the circumstance.
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  • Say it with me, "To pledgeyourself to a stance no matter
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  • what the circumstance."
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  • So really it's easy to explain.
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  • We simply commit ourselvesto what God is committed to.
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  • We commit ourselves to what Godis committed to.
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  • So it starts with God.
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  • Have you committed your lifeto God?
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  • Now, from there it seguesinto something else, and let me
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  • tell you a story.
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  • You remember Apostle Paul, SaintPaul?
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  • Well, Paul was this haterof the church.
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  • Man, he was having Christianskilled.
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  • He was just blowing up churches.
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  • He despised Christianity.
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  • One day, he's like[whistling]
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  • walkin' down the Damascus Road,you know?
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  • Brilliant guy, sharp guy,wealthy guy.
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  • Boom, Jesus started speakingto him and here's what Jesus
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  • said to, at the time, Saul.
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  • Once he became a believer, hisname was changed to Paul.
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  • Here's what Jesus said to him,"Saul!
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  • Saul!
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  • Why are you persecuting me?"
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  • In modern day vernacular, "Whyare you hating on me?"
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  • That's what Jesus said.
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  • Okay, think about it.
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  • What was Paul hating on?
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  • At the time, Saul.
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  • He was heading on the church.
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  • Jesus said, "You're hatingon me."
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  • The body of Christ, the church,Jesus, they're synonymous.
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  • Once we commit our livesto Christ, which Saul did, he
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  • became Paul, he was a partof the church universal,
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  • the universal body of Christ.
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  • Every person who's committedtheir life to Christ is a part
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  • of the church universal.
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  • That'd be a good place to clap.
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  • I mean, wow, wherever you arein one of our many different
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  • locations, we're all a part.
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  • We're all a part, all believers,of a local church, also we're
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  • a part of a universal church.
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  • We're part of a universal churchand a local church.
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  • Believers in the Bible werehooked up to a local church.
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  • Now, let me read you someverses.
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  • I'm going to read one kinda slowand then I'm gonna fly
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  • through some verses.
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  • The Bible says in 1 Corinthianschapter 12, verse 27, "Now, now,
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  • you are the body of Christ,"because of commitment, "and each
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  • one of you," becauseof commitment, "is a part
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  • of it."
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  • We commit.
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  • We're not born as a body partin the body of Christ.
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  • We have to say, "Okay, I'mcommitted," then we're part
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  • of the body of Christ,universal, then of course local.
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  • Membership has its privilege.
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  • Every member is a ministerin God's economy.
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  • And membership means ministry.
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  • You're active, I'm active, asa member.
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  • And if a body part is notactive, it's usually amputated,
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  • and that's pretty heavy.
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  • So the Bible comesalong and says that.
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  • Just a couple days ago, I wasin a leadership meeting
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  • with several leaders from hereand also some
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  • from around the country and wewere talking about the lack
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  • of commitment in the church.
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  • We've done some studies hereand we discovered that 30%
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  • of people, 30% of our mostinvolved people, show up once
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  • every three weeks.
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  • Let me say that again.
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  • [pretending to rewind].
  • 00:09:03.689 --> 00:09:05.458
  • We tracked it through ourchildren's data.
  • 00:09:05.491 --> 00:09:09.161
  • Our most faithful people, areyou ready for that, show
  • 00:09:09.195 --> 00:09:13.099
  • up to Fellowship Church onceevery three weeks.
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  • And I said that and peoplein the room were like, "Wow."
  • 00:09:19.538 --> 00:09:25.344
  • Then they began to check itand they go, "We're the same.
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  • We're the same."
  • 00:09:28.748 --> 00:09:30.082
  • From across the country, "We'rethe same.
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  • We're the same.
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  • Yeah, that makes sense.
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  • We're the same."
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  • The church has becomeincreasingly marginalized,
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  • hasn't it?
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  • We want, again, trust.
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  • We want intimacy.
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  • We want happiness.
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  • We want joy.
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  • Yet the things we chase awayfrom commitment, we never get
  • 00:09:47.667 --> 00:09:50.936
  • there.
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  • The Bible says when we committo God, when we commit to his
  • 00:09:52.304 --> 00:09:56.442
  • house, then we will accrue thesebenefits in our lives.
  • 00:09:56.475 --> 00:10:02.515
  • Then and only then will wediscover what we're looking for.
  • 00:10:02.548 --> 00:10:07.086
  • The church, though, has becomeincreasingly marginalized.
  • 00:10:07.119 --> 00:10:11.691
  • Parents worship extra curricularactivities.
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  • We're in big competitionwith other parents.
  • 00:10:14.627 --> 00:10:17.463
  • We bow to the soccer ball.
  • 00:10:17.496 --> 00:10:19.598
  • We bow to the football.
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  • We bow to club cheer.
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  • We bow to here, there,and yonder.
  • 00:10:23.602 --> 00:10:26.906
  • I looked this up recently.
  • 00:10:26.939 --> 00:10:28.941
  • Only 1%, parents, of childrenget a full ride in a Division I
  • 00:10:28.974 --> 00:10:36.982
  • school.
  • 00:10:37.016 --> 00:10:38.317
  • It will not happen for LittleJohnny.
  • 00:10:38.350 --> 00:10:42.054
  • It will not happen.
  • 00:10:42.088 --> 00:10:45.091
  • Now, you do have a good chanceof getting a full ride if your
  • 00:10:45.124 --> 00:10:49.895
  • kid is into fencing.
  • 00:10:49.929 --> 00:10:53.132
  • Thirty-two percent of those whoare into, "En-garde," yeah, you
  • 00:10:53.165 --> 00:10:59.004
  • could get a full ride.
  • 00:10:59.038 --> 00:11:01.440
  • So we're chasing this, and that,and yonder, obviously you're not
  • 00:11:01.474 --> 00:11:05.077
  • because you're here,at the expense of the only
  • 00:11:05.111 --> 00:11:08.781
  • institution that Jesus everbuilt.
  • 00:11:08.814 --> 00:11:12.151
  • Have you ever thoughtabout the gigantic worship
  • 00:11:12.184 --> 00:11:15.788
  • centers right now across ourcountry?
  • 00:11:15.821 --> 00:11:18.791
  • Have you ever thoughtof the billions of dollars that
  • 00:11:18.824 --> 00:11:22.361
  • people tithe.
  • 00:11:22.394 --> 00:11:25.765
  • All the football stadiums.
  • 00:11:25.798 --> 00:11:27.767
  • That's what I'm talkin' about,houses of worship.
  • 00:11:27.800 --> 00:11:30.369
  • All the arenas.
  • 00:11:30.402 --> 00:11:31.704
  • Oh, we dress up in the colors.
  • 00:11:31.737 --> 00:11:34.340
  • We paint our faces.
  • 00:11:34.373 --> 00:11:36.742
  • People who are so conservativehere, who would never even clap
  • 00:11:36.776 --> 00:11:40.045
  • or raise their hand, are like,"Yeah!!"
  • 00:11:40.079 --> 00:11:44.517
  • goin' absolutely buck wild.
  • 00:11:44.550 --> 00:11:48.521
  • We pay thousands of dollarsto sit in cramped seats and eat
  • 00:11:48.554 --> 00:11:52.792
  • overpriced junk food.
  • 00:11:52.825 --> 00:11:55.661
  • If somebody's going to complainto me because they gotta wait
  • 00:11:55.694 --> 00:11:59.298
  • in line or the service was fiveminutes too long.
  • 00:11:59.331 --> 00:12:03.169
  • Isn't that funny?
  • 00:12:03.202 --> 00:12:04.804
  • Really is.
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  • We've lost our commitment.
  • 00:12:06.405 --> 00:12:10.476
  • And I'm not hating on footballor sports.
  • 00:12:10.509 --> 00:12:13.445
  • I like it.
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  • There's the balance.
  • 00:12:14.814 --> 00:12:16.148
  • Parents, you gotta choose onesport and you've gotta say, "As
  • 00:12:16.182 --> 00:12:18.184
  • far as me and my house, we arecommitted to God
  • 00:12:18.217 --> 00:12:21.954
  • and to the church."
  • 00:12:21.987 --> 00:12:23.322
  • Okay, you ready to write?
  • 00:12:23.355 --> 00:12:24.657
  • I'm gonna fly through someScriptures because the Bible
  • 00:12:24.690 --> 00:12:27.059
  • says--and all these Scriptureswere written in the context
  • 00:12:27.092 --> 00:12:30.262
  • of the local church, becausea text taken out of context is
  • 00:12:30.296 --> 00:12:35.000
  • a pretext.
  • 00:12:35.034 --> 00:12:36.335
  • You must take the textwithin the context.
  • 00:12:36.368 --> 00:12:38.237
  • And the context is not justto an individual believer, it is
  • 00:12:38.270 --> 00:12:41.640
  • to someone who is a memberof the local church, the only
  • 00:12:41.674 --> 00:12:45.945
  • thing that Jesus ever built.
  • 00:12:45.978 --> 00:12:49.081
  • He didn't build a school.
  • 00:12:49.114 --> 00:12:50.549
  • He didn't build a stadium.
  • 00:12:50.583 --> 00:12:52.117
  • He didn't build an arena.
  • 00:12:52.151 --> 00:12:53.652
  • He didn't own a sportsfranchise.
  • 00:12:53.686 --> 00:12:55.955
  • He built the church.
  • 00:12:55.988 --> 00:12:57.323
  • Here we go.
  • 00:12:57.356 --> 00:12:58.657
  • Romans chapter 12, verse 10, "Bedevoted to," say it with me--
  • 00:12:58.691 --> 00:13:00.960
  • audience: "One another."
  • 00:13:00.993 --> 00:13:03.195
  • Ed Young: Well, you soundexcited.
  • 00:13:03.229 --> 00:13:04.530
  • Say it like you're--say itlike you're cheering for your
  • 00:13:04.563 --> 00:13:09.802
  • team in the NationalChampionship.
  • 00:13:09.835 --> 00:13:14.173
  • "Be devoted to--"audience: "One another!"
  • 00:13:14.206 --> 00:13:16.842
  • Ed Young: "In love.Honor--"
  • 00:13:16.876 --> 00:13:18.210
  • audience: "One another!"
  • 00:13:18.244 --> 00:13:19.545
  • Ed Young: "Above yourselves."
  • 00:13:19.578 --> 00:13:20.913
  • 2 Corinthians chapter 13:11,"Finally, brothers and sisters,
  • 00:13:20.946 --> 00:13:22.681
  • rejoice!
  • 00:13:22.715 --> 00:13:24.016
  • Strive for full restoration,encourage--"
  • 00:13:24.049 --> 00:13:25.384
  • audience: "One another!"
  • 00:13:25.417 --> 00:13:26.785
  • Ed Young: "Be of one mind, livein peace, and the God of love
  • 00:13:26.819 --> 00:13:28.888
  • and peace will be with you."
  • 00:13:28.921 --> 00:13:30.222
  • Galatians chapter 5, verse 13,"But don't use your freedom
  • 00:13:30.256 --> 00:13:32.791
  • to satisfy your sinful nature.
  • 00:13:32.825 --> 00:13:34.126
  • Instead, use your freedomto serve--"
  • 00:13:34.159 --> 00:13:35.661
  • audience: "One another!"
  • 00:13:35.694 --> 00:13:37.263
  • Ed Young: "In love."
  • 00:13:37.296 --> 00:13:38.597
  • Galatians chapter 6, verse 2,"Bear--"
  • 00:13:38.631 --> 00:13:39.965
  • Ed Young: "One another's!"
  • 00:13:39.999 --> 00:13:41.300
  • Ed Young: "Burden,and so fulfill the law
  • 00:13:41.333 --> 00:13:42.668
  • of Christ."
  • 00:13:42.701 --> 00:13:44.003
  • Ephesians chapter 4, verse 2,"Be completely humble
  • 00:13:44.036 --> 00:13:45.504
  • and gentle; be patient,bearing with--"
  • 00:13:45.537 --> 00:13:47.473
  • audience: "One another!"
  • 00:13:47.506 --> 00:13:49.108
  • Ed Young: "In love."
  • 00:13:49.141 --> 00:13:50.542
  • Ephesians chapter 4, verse 32,"Be kind and compassionate to--"
  • 00:13:50.576 --> 00:13:52.244
  • audience: "One another!"
  • 00:13:52.278 --> 00:13:53.646
  • Ed Young: Forgiving each other,just as Christ God forgave you.
  • 00:13:53.679 --> 00:13:57.850
  • [mumbling and stuttering].
  • 00:13:57.883 --> 00:13:59.952
  • It's hard to read that fast.
  • 00:13:59.985 --> 00:14:02.454
  • Hebrews chapter 3, verse 13,"Exhort--"
  • 00:14:02.488 --> 00:14:03.923
  • audience: "One another!"
  • 00:14:03.956 --> 00:14:05.925
  • Ed Young: "Daily, while it'scalled today."
  • 00:14:05.958 --> 00:14:07.259
  • Hebrews chapter 10, verses 24and 25, "And let us not consider
  • 00:14:07.293 --> 00:14:10.296
  • how we may spur--"audience: "One another!"
  • 00:14:10.329 --> 00:14:12.197
  • Ed Young: "On toward loveand good deeds, not giving
  • 00:14:12.231 --> 00:14:13.999
  • up the meeting together,or someone in the habit
  • 00:14:14.033 --> 00:14:15.501
  • of doing, but encouraging--"
  • 00:14:15.534 --> 00:14:17.002
  • audience: "One another!"
  • 00:14:17.036 --> 00:14:18.504
  • Ed Young: "And all the more asyou see the day approaching."
  • 00:14:18.537 --> 00:14:21.640
  • Those are just someof the verses talking about what
  • 00:14:21.674 --> 00:14:24.777
  • we can do if we're a memberof the church.
  • 00:14:24.810 --> 00:14:29.048
  • Here's the church.
  • 00:14:29.081 --> 00:14:30.382
  • Remember this?
  • 00:14:30.416 --> 00:14:33.385
  • There's the steeple.
  • 00:14:33.419 --> 00:14:35.421
  • Open the doors and see allof the hopefully committed
  • 00:14:35.454 --> 00:14:41.160
  • people.
  • 00:14:41.193 --> 00:14:42.528
  • Here's the question.
  • 00:14:42.561 --> 00:14:43.862
  • What if--whoa, look at thesepeople.
  • 00:14:43.896 --> 00:14:45.431
  • What if every person hadthe same commitment quotient
  • 00:14:45.464 --> 00:14:51.570
  • as you?
  • 00:14:51.603 --> 00:14:52.905
  • What if every person wascommitted to prayer like you?
  • 00:14:52.938 --> 00:14:56.442
  • What if every person wascommitted to bringing their
  • 00:14:56.475 --> 00:14:59.845
  • finances like you?
  • 00:14:59.878 --> 00:15:01.180
  • What if every person servedlike you?
  • 00:15:01.213 --> 00:15:04.083
  • What if every person witnessedlike you?
  • 00:15:04.116 --> 00:15:06.986
  • What if every person volunteeredlike you?
  • 00:15:07.019 --> 00:15:10.389
  • What if every person read theirBible like you?
  • 00:15:10.422 --> 00:15:15.294
  • What kind of church would wehave?
  • 00:15:15.327 --> 00:15:17.796
  • How committed would we be?
  • 00:15:17.830 --> 00:15:22.167
  • I mean, too many of us are justbarking around the edge
  • 00:15:22.201 --> 00:15:25.170
  • of the pool, like our Maltipoo,who's a rescue; our Golden
  • 00:15:25.204 --> 00:15:31.510
  • Doodle, who's not; and our bigbad doberman, who's
  • 00:15:31.543 --> 00:15:35.781
  • definitely not.
  • 00:15:35.814 --> 00:15:37.282
  • They're just barking, making allthis racket and noise.
  • 00:15:37.316 --> 00:15:40.519
  • Level, fully committed.
  • 00:15:40.552 --> 00:15:44.356
  • It was cold this morning in thatpool.
  • 00:15:44.390 --> 00:15:46.859
  • He just, boom, jumped in.
  • 00:15:46.892 --> 00:15:50.529
  • And it's time that we jumpin and say, God, "I wanna be
  • 00:15:50.562 --> 00:15:52.564
  • committed to what you'recommitted to."
  • 00:15:52.598 --> 00:15:53.932
  • It starts with God, right?
  • 00:15:53.966 --> 00:15:55.501
  • Then it moves into the church.
  • 00:15:55.534 --> 00:15:58.237
  • We commit to church membership.
  • 00:15:58.270 --> 00:16:00.005
  • God moves in mysterious ways.
  • 00:16:00.039 --> 00:16:02.241
  • God moves corporately.
  • 00:16:02.274 --> 00:16:03.942
  • Ed Young: Thank you for tuningin.
  • 00:16:03.976 --> 00:16:05.644
  • We really have a great timebringing this program to you.
  • 00:16:05.677 --> 00:16:08.514
  • Thank you for connectingwith us, and we want to hear
  • 00:16:08.547 --> 00:16:10.749
  • from you.
  • 00:16:10.783 --> 00:16:12.084
  • For your gift, and I'm talkingabout any gift, I have something
  • 00:16:12.117 --> 00:16:14.019
  • special that we're going to sendto you and I think you'll
  • 00:16:14.053 --> 00:16:17.856
  • really, really like it.
  • 00:16:17.890 --> 00:16:19.525
  • Simply go to our website,edyoung.com, and we'll be happy
  • 00:16:19.558 --> 00:16:24.463
  • to connect with you, because wehave amazing plans in the future
  • 00:16:24.496 --> 00:16:28.801
  • and it can only happen becauseof your generosity.
  • 00:16:28.834 --> 00:16:32.571
  • Ed Young: How 'bout when itcomes to the spouse?
  • 00:16:32.604 --> 00:16:34.740
  • That's a big relationship.
  • 00:16:34.773 --> 00:16:36.108
  • I mean, the only relationshipthat's analogous to God's
  • 00:16:36.141 --> 00:16:39.344
  • relationship with his people,of course, and the church, would
  • 00:16:39.378 --> 00:16:43.248
  • be that in marriage.
  • 00:16:43.282 --> 00:16:45.951
  • How about marriage?
  • 00:16:45.984 --> 00:16:48.554
  • That's a pretty big issue.
  • 00:16:48.587 --> 00:16:50.656
  • Some people are, like, afraidof commitment,
  • 00:16:50.689 --> 00:16:54.226
  • commitment-phobic, afraidof marriage.
  • 00:16:54.259 --> 00:16:56.161
  • Well, if I get married, man,I mean, I won't be free.
  • 00:16:56.195 --> 00:17:00.165
  • I won't be free.
  • 00:17:00.199 --> 00:17:01.500
  • What if a supermodel comesalong and she loves Jesus?
  • 00:17:01.533 --> 00:17:07.439
  • There's always gonna be somebodybetter looking.
  • 00:17:07.473 --> 00:17:10.242
  • Well, what if, I don't know, youknow, what if a guy comes
  • 00:17:10.275 --> 00:17:14.980
  • along and I don't care if helooks good, but he's rich and he
  • 00:17:15.013 --> 00:17:20.385
  • loves the Lord?
  • 00:17:20.419 --> 00:17:22.020
  • Well, ladies, I know there'salways gonna be somebody better
  • 00:17:22.054 --> 00:17:26.024
  • looking than your man, or havemore money than your man,
  • 00:17:26.058 --> 00:17:29.461
  • cooler than your man.
  • 00:17:29.495 --> 00:17:30.796
  • That's just the way it is.
  • 00:17:30.829 --> 00:17:32.164
  • If you're waiting, and waiting,and waiting, you'll never
  • 00:17:32.197 --> 00:17:33.866
  • commit.
  • 00:17:33.899 --> 00:17:35.634
  • Freedom.
  • 00:17:35.667 --> 00:17:36.969
  • And people are like, "Well, Idon't wanna get hurt.
  • 00:17:37.002 --> 00:17:38.504
  • I don't want to get hurt."
  • 00:17:38.537 --> 00:17:40.072
  • Well, when you commit, you'regonna get hurt.
  • 00:17:40.105 --> 00:17:43.208
  • I mean, that's just part of itsometimes, you know?
  • 00:17:43.242 --> 00:17:45.110
  • And maybe in our past we'vegotten hurt and we're
  • 00:17:45.144 --> 00:17:47.045
  • commitment-phobic because if Iput my heart out there, I'll get
  • 00:17:47.079 --> 00:17:49.848
  • it hammered and it'll come backto me and I'll be rejected.
  • 00:17:49.882 --> 00:17:52.417
  • Well, that's just the way it is.
  • 00:17:52.451 --> 00:17:54.386
  • And then others are like, "Well,I'm just waiting for the right
  • 00:17:54.419 --> 00:17:56.522
  • time to get married.
  • 00:17:56.555 --> 00:17:57.890
  • The right time.
  • 00:17:57.923 --> 00:17:59.224
  • And when I can afford it, I'llget married."
  • 00:17:59.258 --> 00:18:01.326
  • Boy, you'll never get married.
  • 00:18:01.360 --> 00:18:03.862
  • "When I can afford it.
  • 00:18:03.896 --> 00:18:05.230
  • When I can afford it, I'm gonnahave kids."
  • 00:18:05.264 --> 00:18:06.565
  • You ain't gonna ever have kids.
  • 00:18:06.598 --> 00:18:09.968
  • "I'll start tithing when I canafford it."
  • 00:18:10.002 --> 00:18:11.403
  • It's not gonna happen, never.
  • 00:18:11.436 --> 00:18:15.340
  • Feeling.
  • 00:18:15.374 --> 00:18:16.675
  • Well, I just don't feel it.
  • 00:18:16.708 --> 00:18:20.412
  • Well, I would like to sat by mypool, have some poached eggs.
  • 00:18:20.445 --> 00:18:25.584
  • I've been making poached eggs.
  • 00:18:25.617 --> 00:18:26.952
  • I'm really into poached eggs.
  • 00:18:26.985 --> 00:18:28.287
  • I don't know why, it's justweird.
  • 00:18:28.320 --> 00:18:29.621
  • I'm obsessive-compulsive.
  • 00:18:29.655 --> 00:18:30.989
  • I wouldn't mind just sittingback, drinking coffee, having
  • 00:18:31.023 --> 00:18:33.225
  • some poached eggs, chilling,takin' my rod and reel, casting
  • 00:18:33.258 --> 00:18:36.828
  • in the pool a little bit, havingthe dogs bark and Level swim
  • 00:18:36.862 --> 00:18:39.932
  • around and chase allthe different fishing lures I'm
  • 00:18:39.965 --> 00:18:41.767
  • trying out.
  • 00:18:41.800 --> 00:18:43.135
  • That's what I would rather bedoing.
  • 00:18:43.168 --> 00:18:44.469
  • I feel like doing that.
  • 00:18:44.503 --> 00:18:45.837
  • I don't feel like doing what I'mdoing now, so it must be real.
  • 00:18:45.871 --> 00:18:48.307
  • No, no, it's not real.
  • 00:18:48.340 --> 00:18:50.542
  • Feelings will lie to us.
  • 00:18:50.576 --> 00:18:52.544
  • So think about--thinkabout your spouse.
  • 00:18:52.578 --> 00:18:54.780
  • Are you committed to yourspouse?
  • 00:18:54.813 --> 00:18:56.715
  • Have you committed in marriage?
  • 00:18:56.748 --> 00:18:58.850
  • Because when we commit--onlyin the soils of commitment will
  • 00:18:58.884 --> 00:19:02.688
  • we experience intimacy,and maturity, and joy,
  • 00:19:02.721 --> 00:19:06.391
  • and happiness, and trust,and discipline, and vision.
  • 00:19:06.425 --> 00:19:10.262
  • Only through that.
  • 00:19:10.295 --> 00:19:12.397
  • So what's so funny issomebody'll get married
  • 00:19:12.431 --> 00:19:17.169
  • and they're like, "Oh man,you're not meeting my needs.
  • 00:19:17.202 --> 00:19:19.705
  • And I don't know.
  • 00:19:19.738 --> 00:19:21.473
  • And I don't feel like it.
  • 00:19:21.506 --> 00:19:23.275
  • And I feel hemmed in."
  • 00:19:23.308 --> 00:19:25.711
  • Here's the deal.
  • 00:19:25.744 --> 00:19:27.079
  • You look at your spouse and yousee reflected back who you
  • 00:19:27.112 --> 00:19:29.781
  • really are.
  • 00:19:29.815 --> 00:19:31.116
  • So you ditch that relationshipand you trade it in for a newer
  • 00:19:31.149 --> 00:19:36.221
  • model, right?
  • 00:19:36.255 --> 00:19:39.891
  • Younger model, guys.
  • 00:19:39.925 --> 00:19:42.594
  • Ladies, a more expensive model.
  • 00:19:42.628 --> 00:19:45.464
  • Bentley, yeah.
  • 00:19:45.497 --> 00:19:46.898
  • Well, guess what?
  • 00:19:46.932 --> 00:19:48.233
  • You have the same problemwith that Maserati or Bentley
  • 00:19:48.267 --> 00:19:51.336
  • that you have with that FordF-150.
  • 00:19:51.370 --> 00:19:54.773
  • Same crap, because there's oneperson.
  • 00:19:54.806 --> 00:19:59.411
  • There's one person who isconstant: you.
  • 00:19:59.444 --> 00:20:03.482
  • You.
  • 00:20:03.515 --> 00:20:04.850
  • And then people sometimes--sometimes people do this.
  • 00:20:04.883 --> 00:20:06.385
  • All right, all right, whenyou're married
  • 00:20:06.418 --> 00:20:09.454
  • and in commitment, you gottacrash through quitting points.
  • 00:20:09.488 --> 00:20:12.291
  • And I've written about this,and talked about this,
  • 00:20:12.324 --> 00:20:13.959
  • and discussed this, but I alwayssay in marriage, you gotta go
  • 00:20:13.992 --> 00:20:17.629
  • into four-wheel drive.
  • 00:20:17.663 --> 00:20:19.398
  • Four-wheel drive.
  • 00:20:19.431 --> 00:20:20.732
  • I got a truck, four-wheel drive,man.
  • 00:20:20.766 --> 00:20:22.801
  • I hadn't had to use four-wheeldrive a lot, but sometimes I do.
  • 00:20:22.834 --> 00:20:25.771
  • And four-wheel drive, you'redriving on the freeway
  • 00:20:25.804 --> 00:20:27.339
  • [imitating car noises].
  • 00:20:27.372 --> 00:20:29.841
  • and you have a problemin marriage.
  • 00:20:29.875 --> 00:20:31.176
  • All marriages have problems.
  • 00:20:31.209 --> 00:20:33.312
  • PMS, power, money, and sex.
  • 00:20:33.345 --> 00:20:35.213
  • Those are the big three.
  • 00:20:35.247 --> 00:20:37.616
  • We veer off the freeway and wecan start four-wheeling.
  • 00:20:37.649 --> 00:20:41.620
  • You gotta commit.
  • 00:20:41.653 --> 00:20:47.526
  • [imitating four-wheel drive].
  • 00:20:47.559 --> 00:20:50.262
  • You gotta be willing to gointo four-wheel drive.
  • 00:20:50.295 --> 00:20:52.297
  • And only with commitment, onlyin a covenant, will you have
  • 00:20:52.331 --> 00:20:57.202
  • the octane to feel comfortablegoing into four-wheel drive.
  • 00:20:57.235 --> 00:21:02.274
  • Now, sometimes you're like,"Man, we're stuck."
  • 00:21:02.307 --> 00:21:05.577
  • Call for help.
  • 00:21:05.610 --> 00:21:07.746
  • I've been stuck before.
  • 00:21:07.779 --> 00:21:09.548
  • Call for help.
  • 00:21:09.581 --> 00:21:11.683
  • One time I got stuckin a four-wheel drive vehicle.
  • 00:21:11.717 --> 00:21:14.252
  • Call for help.
  • 00:21:14.286 --> 00:21:15.620
  • I called for help.
  • 00:21:15.654 --> 00:21:16.955
  • And call for a Christiancounselor.
  • 00:21:16.988 --> 00:21:19.558
  • A lot of times people sit down,parents and spouses sit down,
  • 00:21:19.591 --> 00:21:26.631
  • and they talk about familyissues and marriage issues.
  • 00:21:26.665 --> 00:21:28.700
  • And when the counselor startsgetting close to the deal, "Oh,
  • 00:21:28.734 --> 00:21:33.772
  • I don't like him.
  • 00:21:33.805 --> 00:21:35.407
  • I don't like her.
  • 00:21:35.440 --> 00:21:36.742
  • I'm not goin' back to that."
  • 00:21:36.775 --> 00:21:41.380
  • Isn't that interesting?
  • 00:21:41.413 --> 00:21:43.482
  • So often we bail out rightbefore the breakthrough.
  • 00:21:43.515 --> 00:21:46.618
  • I'm talkin' about commitment.
  • 00:21:46.651 --> 00:21:49.121
  • I'm talkin' about commitment.
  • 00:21:49.154 --> 00:21:50.989
  • Put it into four-wheel drive.
  • 00:21:51.022 --> 00:21:55.193
  • Husbands, wives, put itinto four-wheel drive.
  • 00:21:55.227 --> 00:22:00.599
  • Marriage has different typesof temperature.
  • 00:22:00.632 --> 00:22:02.567
  • It's got some hot stuff.
  • 00:22:02.601 --> 00:22:04.669
  • Hot stuff!
  • 00:22:04.703 --> 00:22:06.004
  • And you're, "Wow!"
  • 00:22:06.037 --> 00:22:07.806
  • The Bible made us that way.
  • 00:22:07.839 --> 00:22:09.141
  • This is good.
  • 00:22:09.174 --> 00:22:10.509
  • There's also some lukewarmstuff.
  • 00:22:10.542 --> 00:22:13.979
  • There's also some cold stuff,sometimes icicles.
  • 00:22:14.012 --> 00:22:20.318
  • Most of marriage, I hate to rainon your romantic parade, hate
  • 00:22:20.352 --> 00:22:25.490
  • to rain on the Hallmark Channeland these romantic comedies,
  • 00:22:25.524 --> 00:22:30.629
  • but most of marriage, sorry,Matthew McConaughey, most
  • 00:22:30.662 --> 00:22:34.866
  • of marriage, Sandra Bullock,Jennifer Aniston, most
  • 00:22:34.900 --> 00:22:39.070
  • of marriage is lived in thislukewarm situation.
  • 00:22:39.104 --> 00:22:45.710
  • But if you want the greatness,you've got to commit.
  • 00:22:45.744 --> 00:22:50.982
  • People living together now,co-habitation.
  • 00:22:51.016 --> 00:22:55.220
  • Huge amounts of people areliving together.
  • 00:22:55.253 --> 00:22:58.223
  • Just, you know, free sex, nocommitment.
  • 00:22:58.256 --> 00:23:01.226
  • It's great, for guys especially.
  • 00:23:01.259 --> 00:23:03.128
  • And the girls think they canlure him into marriage.
  • 00:23:03.161 --> 00:23:05.564
  • Sometimes it works, sometimes itdoesn't.
  • 00:23:05.597 --> 00:23:07.799
  • Could it be that a lot of us aredating the church and it's time
  • 00:23:07.833 --> 00:23:11.870
  • to get married?
  • 00:23:11.903 --> 00:23:14.372
  • Could it be?
  • 00:23:14.406 --> 00:23:15.707
  • I'm just throwing it out.
  • 00:23:15.740 --> 00:23:17.042
  • So what is fear?
  • 00:23:17.075 --> 00:23:18.410
  • I said earlier fear is a franticeffort to avoid reality.
  • 00:23:18.443 --> 00:23:23.248
  • Maybe fear should be this.
  • 00:23:23.281 --> 00:23:25.283
  • I'm gonna face everythingand receive.
  • 00:23:25.317 --> 00:23:28.920
  • Receive the blessings of God.
  • 00:23:28.954 --> 00:23:33.625
  • Commitment, it starts with God,the house, your spouse, and one
  • 00:23:33.658 --> 00:23:39.064
  • more thing I wanna hit you with.
  • 00:23:39.097 --> 00:23:41.500
  • When we do these things, whenwe're committed to God, it
  • 00:23:41.533 --> 00:23:45.370
  • starts with him, house, spouse,our kids catch it.
  • 00:23:45.403 --> 00:23:50.342
  • You want you want to bringup kids with integrity?
  • 00:23:50.375 --> 00:23:53.278
  • You wanna bring up kidswith creativity?
  • 00:23:53.311 --> 00:23:57.182
  • Do you want to bring up kids whohave a great self-esteem?
  • 00:23:57.215 --> 00:24:01.486
  • It's not gonna be foundon the soccer field,
  • 00:24:01.520 --> 00:24:03.121
  • the football field,the basketball court, or jumping
  • 00:24:03.154 --> 00:24:06.091
  • around cheering, or doingballet.
  • 00:24:06.124 --> 00:24:09.494
  • That stuff is good.
  • 00:24:09.528 --> 00:24:11.663
  • The best is about commitmentto God, to the house, to your
  • 00:24:11.696 --> 00:24:18.403
  • spouse, and the people that yourun with.
  • 00:24:18.436 --> 00:24:23.108
  • So commit to the people who arecommitted to God.
  • 00:24:23.141 --> 00:24:25.410
  • Who do you run with?
  • 00:24:25.443 --> 00:24:28.179
  • One time I was in some swampywaters with a friend of mine who
  • 00:24:28.213 --> 00:24:31.416
  • was a Marine, served in Vietnam.
  • 00:24:31.449 --> 00:24:33.818
  • When I emerged from the waters,I had this leech on my leg,
  • 00:24:33.852 --> 00:24:37.255
  • a big ol' black leech.
  • 00:24:37.289 --> 00:24:38.657
  • I was like, "Oh my gosh, it'sa leech!"
  • 00:24:38.690 --> 00:24:41.393
  • You know, you have thesenightmares of him sucking every
  • 00:24:41.426 --> 00:24:45.096
  • bit of blood out of your body.
  • 00:24:45.130 --> 00:24:46.431
  • So thankfully my friend smoked,burned that thing off.
  • 00:24:46.464 --> 00:24:56.308
  • Do you have anyre-leech-onships, any people
  • 00:24:56.341 --> 00:24:59.344
  • sucking the life out of you?
  • 00:24:59.377 --> 00:25:01.780
  • The sinister minister putsabout two or three jacked
  • 00:25:01.813 --> 00:25:04.516
  • up people in everybody's life.
  • 00:25:04.549 --> 00:25:06.952
  • They'll just suck the emotionaland relational energy
  • 00:25:06.985 --> 00:25:10.088
  • out of your life.
  • 00:25:10.121 --> 00:25:12.190
  • Burn 'em off!
  • 00:25:12.223 --> 00:25:14.993
  • Commit to those people who arecommitted.
  • 00:25:15.026 --> 00:25:18.496
  • Where do you find 'em?
  • 00:25:18.530 --> 00:25:20.065
  • Here's the church, there'sthe steeple.
  • 00:25:20.098 --> 00:25:22.867
  • Open the doors and see allof the committed people.
  • 00:25:22.901 --> 00:25:25.971
  • So commit to people who sharethe commitment that you desire.
  • 00:25:26.004 --> 00:25:33.144
  • We abandon commitment.
  • 00:25:33.178 --> 00:25:34.479
  • We abandon intimacy.
  • 00:25:34.512 --> 00:25:36.348
  • Commit to God.
  • 00:25:36.381 --> 00:25:39.317
  • So where are you, on the edgeof the pool or are you
  • 00:25:39.351 --> 00:25:45.090
  • like Level?
  • 00:25:45.123 --> 00:25:47.192
  • Are you all in?
  • 00:25:47.225 --> 00:25:49.027
  • Ed Young: Thank you so muchfor allowing us to come
  • 00:25:49.060 --> 00:25:51.029
  • into your home each and everyweek.
  • 00:25:51.062 --> 00:25:53.298
  • You guys are absolutely amazing.
  • 00:25:53.331 --> 00:25:55.867
  • Thank you for your generosity.
  • 00:25:55.900 --> 00:25:57.402
  • Because of that, that's whywe're on.
  • 00:25:57.435 --> 00:26:00.572
  • There's so many great thingshappening at "Ed Young
  • 00:26:00.605 --> 00:26:02.774
  • Television."
  • 00:26:02.807 --> 00:26:04.142
  • I think about the orphanages.
  • 00:26:04.175 --> 00:26:05.477
  • I think about our retreatcenter.
  • 00:26:05.510 --> 00:26:06.945
  • I think about so many otherthings.
  • 00:26:06.978 --> 00:26:08.647
  • Just go to our website,edyoung.com, and you'll see
  • 00:26:08.680 --> 00:26:12.817
  • what's happening.
  • 00:26:12.851 --> 00:26:14.185
  • So we would love for youto partner with us.
  • 00:26:14.219 --> 00:26:16.721
  • God has been so generous to us.
  • 00:26:16.755 --> 00:26:18.990
  • He is so generous.
  • 00:26:19.024 --> 00:26:20.358
  • We have an opportunity to begenerous back.
  • 00:26:20.392 --> 00:26:23.328
  • So you can call the numberon your screen, you can go
  • 00:26:23.361 --> 00:26:26.665
  • online, you can--you can dohowever you would like to do
  • 00:26:26.698 --> 00:26:30.969
  • this gift to make it the easiestfor you and for us to continue
  • 00:26:31.002 --> 00:26:35.907
  • to push the ball downfieldfor "Ed Young Television."
  • 00:26:35.940 --> 00:26:40.111
  • ♪♪♪
  • 00:26:42.881 --> 00:26:44.849
  • female announcer: For morecontent from Ed Young, visit
  • 00:26:44.883 --> 00:26:46.551
  • edyoung.com or downloadthe Ed Young app.
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  • female announcer: Be sure tofollow him on social media
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  • to stay up to date withPastor Ed.
  • 00:26:56.127 --> 00:26:57.962
  • And don't forget to sharethe show.
  • 00:26:57.996 --> 00:26:59.798
  • Set your DVR and tune in nextweek for another episode of
  • 00:26:59.831 --> 00:27:02.734
  • "Ed Young Television."
  • 00:27:02.767 --> 00:27:04.969
  • ♪ It'll only get betterin heaven. ♪
  • 00:27:07.906 --> 00:27:11.376
  • ♪ Heaven, heaven. ♪
  • 00:27:11.409 --> 00:27:15.714
  • ♪ It'll only get betterwhen I'm with you ♪
  • 00:27:15.747 --> 00:27:19.317
  • ♪ in heaven, heaven. ♪
  • 00:27:19.350 --> 00:27:23.588
  • ♪ It'll only get better. ♪
  • 00:27:23.621 --> 00:27:26.524
  • ♪ Chains are falling. ♪♪
  • 00:27:26.558 --> 00:27:29.194