How to Rate Your Marriage | TBN

How to Rate Your Marriage

Watch How to Rate Your Marriage
November 29, 2016
28:35

Living by Faith with Mike & DeeDee Freeman

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How to Rate Your Marriage

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  • - [Female] So whatever way got can increase me
  • 00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.070
  • with whatever means or whatever situation
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  • I'm saying increase me.
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  • But it ain't just about me.
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  • The devil has taken some stuff from you.
  • 00:00:10.230 --> 00:00:14.030
  • And if you don't put a demand on him
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  • to pay it back you're not going to get it back.
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  • I want you to be so fired up after today,
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  • I want you to leave out of here with
  • 00:00:24.220 --> 00:00:26.220
  • expectation of seeing everything.
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  • Victorious
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  • Oh Jesus
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  • Dr. Mike: Very exciting broadcast
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  • we have here for you today in
  • 00:01:07.220 --> 00:01:10.070
  • just simply rating your marriage.
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  • It is not something that is designed
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  • to put you down or to make you feel
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  • inadequate, but rather to locate you.
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  • You are coming up with a number
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  • that says something about your relationship.
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  • On today's broadcast, we have quite a few people
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  • who were very alarmed about the
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  • number that their spouse gave.
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  • Maybe you have a number that's not
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  • a same number that your spouse has.
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  • On today, we're going to help you move that
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  • number higher so you can make marriage easy.
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  • Stay tuned.
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  • Voiceover: Today on Marriage Made Easy.
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  • Dr. Mike: Here's an exercise for every last couple here.
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  • Use your travel time on the way home,
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  • for instance, and discuss your number.
  • 00:02:02.080 --> 00:02:05.280
  • Where'd you get eight from?
  • 00:02:05.280 --> 00:02:09.080
  • (upbeat drum and guitar music)
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  • Dr. Mike: In a moment you're going to be joining us
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  • with this meeting already in progress.
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  • Let me just give you the back drop.
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  • I have some of the people who assist us
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  • in counseling and meeting with couples
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  • in the ministry of Spirit of Faith Christian Center.
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  • The director, the head of that area of ministry
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  • and his assistant, along with another couple,
  • 00:03:08.270 --> 00:03:12.250
  • are joining us at this particular meeting
  • 00:03:12.250 --> 00:03:16.100
  • to assist us in sharing information.
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  • That's definitely going to make their marriage easy.
  • 00:03:19.020 --> 00:03:21.200
  • Before we go into this broadcast,
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  • I want you to go get a sheet of paper.
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  • If you and your spouse are sitting there together,
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  • go and get a small sheet of paper,
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  • or just pull your iPhone out.
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  • Put the number that you believe
  • 00:03:36.240 --> 00:03:39.240
  • your relationship from one to ten, right?
  • 00:03:39.240 --> 00:03:42.080
  • Dr. Dee Dee: From one to ten.
  • 00:03:42.100 --> 00:03:43.160
  • Dr. Mike: One to ten.
  • 00:03:43.160 --> 00:03:45.070
  • You tell ten being the greatest.
  • 00:03:45.070 --> 00:03:46.280
  • Dr. Dee Dee: Ten being the best.
  • 00:03:46.280 --> 00:03:48.170
  • Dr. Mike: Don't let her see your number.
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  • Don't let him see the number.
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  • You put your number in, and we'll go from there.
  • 00:03:52.230 --> 00:03:55.270
  • Let's go right into today's meeting.
  • 00:03:55.270 --> 00:03:59.050
  • Dr. Mike: Okay, here we go.
  • 00:04:01.080 --> 00:04:04.140
  • Are you ready?
  • 00:04:04.140 --> 00:04:05.200
  • Congregation: Yes.
  • 00:04:05.200 --> 00:04:06.180
  • Don't let them see your paper.
  • 00:04:06.180 --> 00:04:09.150
  • What did I just say?
  • 00:04:09.180 --> 00:04:10.240
  • Congregation: Don't let them see your paper.
  • 00:04:10.240 --> 00:04:12.290
  • Dr. Mike: "Oh, we don't have any secrets."
  • 00:04:12.290 --> 00:04:14.250
  • Look, all I'm saying, for right now,
  • 00:04:14.250 --> 00:04:19.290
  • just don't let him or her see it, okay?
  • 00:04:19.290 --> 00:04:24.020
  • I'll let you know when I want them to see it, okay?
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  • Are you ready?
  • 00:04:31.200 --> 00:04:33.010
  • I say are you ready?
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  • Congregation: Yes.
  • 00:04:34.080 --> 00:04:35.150
  • Dr. Mike: Here's what you're going to do.
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  • On a scale from one to ten,
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  • I need you to rate your marriage.
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  • Ten being the greatest, I need you to rate
  • 00:04:52.100 --> 00:04:56.290
  • from one to ten, rate your marriage,
  • 00:04:56.290 --> 00:05:01.080
  • or your relationship, even as singles.
  • 00:05:01.080 --> 00:05:04.000
  • Give me a number.
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  • Don't let them see your number.
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  • Oh, Jesus.
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  • (laughing)
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  • Oh, Jesus.
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  • Are we all ready?
  • 00:05:14.210 --> 00:05:16.040
  • Congregation: Yes, sir.
  • 00:05:16.040 --> 00:05:17.060
  • Dr. Mike: Who has not finished?
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  • (laughing)
  • 00:05:18.150 --> 00:05:22.240
  • Dr. Mike: (laughs) Hilarious man.
  • 00:05:22.240 --> 00:05:26.270
  • Come on it ain't going to take all night.
  • 00:05:27.070 --> 00:05:28.230
  • Are we ready?
  • 00:05:29.150 --> 00:05:30.290
  • Congregation: Yes.
  • 00:05:30.290 --> 00:05:31.280
  • Dr. Mike: You're done?
  • 00:05:31.280 --> 00:05:32.260
  • Congregation: Yes.
  • 00:05:32.260 --> 00:05:33.230
  • Dr. Mike: Close that paper.
  • 00:05:33.230 --> 00:05:34.170
  • Don't let them see it.
  • 00:05:34.170 --> 00:05:36.000
  • Now you can turn and face forward because I want you,
  • 00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:40.130
  • I want to be able, camera man get ready because
  • 00:05:40.130 --> 00:05:43.230
  • I want to catch some of these facial expressions.
  • 00:05:45.020 --> 00:05:48.020
  • (laughing)
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  • Is your paper folded?
  • 00:05:50.070 --> 00:05:51.260
  • Congregation: Yes.
  • 00:05:51.260 --> 00:05:53.090
  • Dr. Mike: Hand that paper to your mate or spouse.
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  • Don't open it.
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  • Just hand it to them.
  • 00:05:58.160 --> 00:06:00.070
  • Here's my prayer.
  • 00:06:03.230 --> 00:06:05.010
  • (laughing)
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  • Because I'm praying for you.
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  • That your numbers are the same, at least.
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  • Okay, because you are in agreement,
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  • even if it's fo, better known as four.
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  • You know where you are.
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  • Here is the law of destination.
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  • The law of destination says, firstly, you must what?
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  • You must locate yourself.
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  • You must know where you are.
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  • You ever been to a mall and you're
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  • looking for a certain store.
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  • You walk up to this big diagram, this directory.
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  • You had to look for that red, yellow, pink, purple,
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  • black dot that says, "You are here."
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  • Regardless of where the place happens to be,
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  • if you don't know where you are.
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  • I'm preaching better than y'all saying amen.
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  • You'll never know how to get there.
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  • This is just for identification purpose only.
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  • This is not to put anybody down.
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  • At least you have a place where
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  • you can figure out now, wow.
  • 00:07:20.050 --> 00:07:23.070
  • Some of the brother's going to have nine and a half.
  • 00:07:23.230 --> 00:07:26.230
  • (laughing)
  • 00:07:26.230 --> 00:07:32.050
  • And your wife going to have three.
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  • (laughing)
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  • Better know as tres; uno, dos, tres, right.
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  • Here we go; are you ready?
  • 00:07:46.220 --> 00:07:48.100
  • Open your paper.
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  • Okay, good.
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  • I see some high fives, okay.
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  • High fives, I see high fives.
  • 00:07:58.250 --> 00:08:01.260
  • (laughing)
  • 00:08:01.260 --> 00:08:03.130
  • I see frowns.
  • 00:08:03.130 --> 00:08:05.000
  • (laughing)
  • 00:08:05.000 --> 00:08:06.200
  • Oh, don't cuss him; don't cuss him.
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  • (laughing)
  • 00:08:08.140 --> 00:08:11.040
  • Okay, here we go; here we go.
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  • Stand if your numbers were the same, couples.
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  • Okay, that's cool, that's cool.
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  • Alright, that's really good.
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  • Okay, alright.
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  • Okay, now be seated.
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  • Alright.
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  • (laughing)
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  • I'm almost willing to state, I can't.
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  • Here's the most predominant
  • 00:08:53.160 --> 00:08:55.070
  • numbers that we have in this room.
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  • Here they are.
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  • Seven and eight.
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  • Stand up if you have seven or eight.
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  • Dr. Dee Dee: You are good.
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  • Tell them why.
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  • Dr. Mike: Stand up, seven, eight.
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  • Seven says, "I know I'm not doing so good,
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  • but I'm not going to settle for six.
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  • I'm going to say seven.
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  • (laughing)
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  • You judge it.
  • 00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:31.110
  • Eight is saying, "We're not so bad.
  • 00:09:31.110 --> 00:09:34.050
  • "There's so much room that I could have,
  • 00:09:34.160 --> 00:09:37.190
  • "but I can't say nine, so I'll settle
  • 00:09:37.190 --> 00:09:40.110
  • "for eight because ten is out of the question."
  • 00:09:40.110 --> 00:09:43.010
  • (lauging)
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  • Dr. Dee Dee: That's good.
  • 00:09:45.250 --> 00:09:47.160
  • Dr. Mike: Now watch this.
  • 00:09:50.050 --> 00:09:51.220
  • Have a seat.
  • 00:09:51.220 --> 00:09:53.060
  • There are going to be less than this number, very few nines.
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  • Stand nines.
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  • Now I'm talking about nines together.
  • 00:10:01.240 --> 00:10:04.060
  • (laughing)
  • 00:10:04.060 --> 00:10:10.200
  • Okay, you may be seated.
  • 00:10:18.040 --> 00:10:20.020
  • I guarantee you there are less than
  • 00:10:20.060 --> 00:10:22.260
  • four tens, or maybe none at all.
  • 00:10:22.260 --> 00:10:26.190
  • Stand tens.
  • 00:10:26.240 --> 00:10:28.170
  • Now watch this.
  • 00:10:31.090 --> 00:10:32.170
  • I'm not talking about a faith confession.
  • 00:10:34.020 --> 00:10:36.030
  • We're a ten by faith in Jesus name.
  • 00:10:37.230 --> 00:10:39.290
  • (laughing)
  • 00:10:39.290 --> 00:10:42.200
  • One, two, three.
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  • People, I didn't set this up.
  • 00:10:47.040 --> 00:10:51.100
  • Obviously there's some six and
  • 00:10:52.110 --> 00:10:55.270
  • some fives, or lower than sevens.
  • 00:10:55.270 --> 00:10:58.100
  • This exercise, have a seat.
  • 00:11:00.180 --> 00:11:02.100
  • This exercise is not designed to put you down.
  • 00:11:02.240 --> 00:11:07.140
  • Dr. Dee Dee: Right.
  • 00:11:07.140 --> 00:11:08.280
  • Dr. Mike: Or not even to judge you,
  • 00:11:09.120 --> 00:11:11.100
  • but rather it is to locate you.
  • 00:11:11.100 --> 00:11:15.150
  • Here's my style.
  • 00:11:15.230 --> 00:11:17.010
  • If I can't put but seven on that paper,
  • 00:11:17.280 --> 00:11:22.160
  • that is a personal insult to me.
  • 00:11:22.190 --> 00:11:26.170
  • You understand?
  • 00:11:27.100 --> 00:11:28.160
  • It's not an insult in a sense that I'm
  • 00:11:28.260 --> 00:11:32.150
  • disappointed about where I am saying seven.
  • 00:11:32.150 --> 00:11:36.000
  • I know I can do so much better.
  • 00:11:36.040 --> 00:11:38.140
  • I'm going to use this seven.
  • 00:11:38.280 --> 00:11:40.250
  • I'm going to go to her and say, "How do I become eight?"
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  • Are you still here?
  • 00:11:46.200 --> 00:11:48.210
  • If you don't ever get even, okay.
  • 00:11:49.100 --> 00:11:52.240
  • How many couples were not together on your numbers; stand?
  • 00:11:52.270 --> 00:11:57.000
  • Wow, some of y'all standing twice.
  • 00:12:00.090 --> 00:12:04.010
  • (laughing)
  • 00:12:04.010 --> 00:12:06.110
  • Dr. Dee Dee: Maybe they misunderstood the first time.
  • 00:12:06.130 --> 00:12:08.250
  • Like your nines.
  • 00:12:09.270 --> 00:12:11.240
  • Dr. Mike: You are not together?
  • 00:12:12.010 --> 00:12:14.010
  • All of you, your numbers are not together?
  • 00:12:14.230 --> 00:12:17.150
  • Okay, how many men were lower than their wives?
  • 00:12:17.240 --> 00:12:25.260
  • Lift your hand.
  • 00:12:26.090 --> 00:12:27.280
  • No, she had, what number did she write?
  • 00:12:32.190 --> 00:12:35.160
  • Man in congregation: Seven.
  • 00:12:35.160 --> 00:12:36.240
  • Dr. Mike: Seven, what number did you write?
  • 00:12:36.240 --> 00:12:37.230
  • Man in congregation: Eight.
  • 00:12:37.230 --> 00:12:39.050
  • Dr. Mike: Eight, so your number was higher than hers.
  • 00:12:39.050 --> 00:12:42.210
  • Okay, so that's a pretty good thing.
  • 00:12:43.130 --> 00:12:46.030
  • What you got in the back?
  • 00:12:46.130 --> 00:12:48.050
  • I saw your hand up.
  • 00:12:48.270 --> 00:12:50.080
  • My brother there with the hand on chest.
  • 00:12:50.270 --> 00:12:52.220
  • Man in congregation: Seven.
  • 00:12:52.220 --> 00:12:54.030
  • Dr. Mike: Seven, your number was seven.
  • 00:12:54.030 --> 00:12:55.090
  • What about your spouse?
  • 00:12:55.090 --> 00:12:56.140
  • Man in congregation: Five.
  • 00:12:56.140 --> 00:12:57.170
  • Dr. Mike: Five.
  • 00:12:57.170 --> 00:12:59.070
  • Man in congregation: She wrote five; I wrote seven.
  • 00:12:59.070 --> 00:13:00.160
  • Dr. Mike She wrote five; you wrote seven.
  • 00:13:00.160 --> 00:13:02.170
  • Most men are grading their
  • 00:13:02.170 --> 00:13:06.030
  • marriages higher than their wives.
  • 00:13:06.030 --> 00:13:08.170
  • That's what I'm asking.
  • 00:13:09.230 --> 00:13:11.050
  • How many men graded your marriage higher than your wife?
  • 00:13:11.050 --> 00:13:16.090
  • See how men do?
  • 00:13:19.020 --> 00:13:20.080
  • (laughing)
  • 00:13:20.190 --> 00:13:22.240
  • We ain't that bad.
  • 00:13:23.020 --> 00:13:24.090
  • I don't know where you get this five from.
  • 00:13:24.090 --> 00:13:27.080
  • (laughing)
  • 00:13:27.080 --> 00:13:29.090
  • That must be because of you.
  • 00:13:29.110 --> 00:13:30.230
  • (laughing)
  • 00:13:30.230 --> 00:13:32.250
  • (upbeat guitar music)
  • 00:13:33.260 --> 00:13:42.160
  • (low tempo guitar music)
  • 00:13:44.150 --> 00:13:56.280
  • Dr. Mike: It's important that you
  • 00:13:57.260 --> 00:13:59.240
  • do things together as husband and wife.
  • 00:13:59.240 --> 00:14:02.090
  • Sometimes you get in to this rut and this
  • 00:14:02.090 --> 00:14:05.040
  • routine about how your doing life.
  • 00:14:05.040 --> 00:14:09.060
  • It appears as though you're
  • 00:14:09.170 --> 00:14:10.240
  • together, but you're just gathered.
  • 00:14:10.240 --> 00:14:13.200
  • There's a difference.
  • 00:14:13.200 --> 00:14:14.250
  • In the scripture in the bible says,
  • 00:14:14.250 --> 00:14:16.080
  • "Where two or three are gathered together in my name."
  • 00:14:16.080 --> 00:14:21.140
  • We found out that there are husband and
  • 00:14:21.230 --> 00:14:24.020
  • wives who are gathered but they are-
  • 00:14:24.020 --> 00:14:27.100
  • Dr. Dee Dee: No together.
  • 00:14:27.100 --> 00:14:28.220
  • Dr. Mike: It's important that you do things together.
  • 00:14:28.220 --> 00:14:30.260
  • Go back to some of the times where you were
  • 00:14:31.110 --> 00:14:34.270
  • dating one another; courting one another.
  • 00:14:34.270 --> 00:14:38.200
  • Player, player, you made sure that you were on your game,
  • 00:14:38.240 --> 00:14:43.130
  • and that you took her out, and you wined and dined her.
  • 00:14:44.050 --> 00:14:47.280
  • That's with the grape juice version.
  • 00:14:48.090 --> 00:14:50.180
  • (laughing)
  • 00:14:50.240 --> 00:14:52.150
  • You did things together.
  • 00:14:52.210 --> 00:14:53.280
  • You went to the movies and so forth and so on.
  • 00:14:53.280 --> 00:14:55.260
  • Make her your friend again.
  • 00:14:55.260 --> 00:14:57.130
  • Make him your friend again.
  • 00:14:57.130 --> 00:14:59.060
  • Do things together.
  • 00:14:59.060 --> 00:15:00.150
  • I guarantee you you'll find out that a lot
  • 00:15:00.150 --> 00:15:02.200
  • of tension and stress that you are
  • 00:15:02.200 --> 00:15:04.100
  • experiencing, you'll recapture and recover
  • 00:15:04.100 --> 00:15:08.260
  • some of the moments that you used to have together.
  • 00:15:08.260 --> 00:15:12.040
  • When she smiled, you smiled back.
  • 00:15:12.040 --> 00:15:14.060
  • When you smiled, she smiled back.
  • 00:15:14.060 --> 00:15:16.050
  • We got to get that loving feeling you lost.
  • 00:15:16.050 --> 00:15:19.000
  • Dr. Dee Dee: That loving feeling.
  • 00:15:19.000 --> 00:15:20.190
  • Dr. Mike: Loving feeling.
  • 00:15:20.190 --> 00:15:22.030
  • Even if it's golf or putt-putt,
  • 00:15:22.030 --> 00:15:23.230
  • or whatever have you, basketball.
  • 00:15:23.230 --> 00:15:25.280
  • Just go for a walk and talk.
  • 00:15:25.280 --> 00:15:28.070
  • Enjoy each other's fellowship.
  • 00:15:28.070 --> 00:15:30.080
  • That's how God communed with the first couple in the garden.
  • 00:15:30.080 --> 00:15:34.020
  • He fellowshipped with them as they fellowshipped with Him.
  • 00:15:34.020 --> 00:15:37.160
  • Dr. Dee Dee and I want to give you some tips
  • 00:15:37.160 --> 00:15:40.090
  • in helping you to make your marriage easy.
  • 00:15:40.090 --> 00:15:44.220
  • God bless you; we'll see you.
  • 00:15:44.220 --> 00:15:46.140
  • Voiceover: If I can turn back time.
  • 00:15:49.030 --> 00:15:51.130
  • (laughing)
  • 00:15:52.080 --> 00:15:53.100
  • (laughing)
  • 00:16:01.230 --> 00:16:06.230
  • And she could be saying something to you
  • 00:16:07.030 --> 00:16:09.190
  • with her number that you are not
  • 00:16:09.190 --> 00:16:12.140
  • realizing about your relationship.
  • 00:16:12.140 --> 00:16:15.030
  • If she has five, to me, that's not a bad thing.
  • 00:16:16.260 --> 00:16:20.030
  • That's not to judge anyone.
  • 00:16:20.030 --> 00:16:22.110
  • That's not to ridicule anyone; put anybody down.
  • 00:16:22.110 --> 00:16:26.020
  • That's just to let me know, if my wife is saying five,
  • 00:16:26.020 --> 00:16:30.120
  • then I got to get to work because I am personally.
  • 00:16:31.290 --> 00:16:36.220
  • I'm insulted myself.
  • 00:16:36.220 --> 00:16:38.240
  • This ain't got nothing to do with,
  • 00:16:38.240 --> 00:16:40.100
  • this has nothing to do with anyone in this room but me
  • 00:16:40.100 --> 00:16:45.060
  • because I'm the only one that's married to her.
  • 00:16:45.060 --> 00:16:47.280
  • If she's saying five, that five is going to change right away.
  • 00:16:48.080 --> 00:16:53.140
  • If she's saying six, if she's even saying seven.
  • 00:16:53.180 --> 00:16:56.290
  • If she's saying eight, why can't I be a nine?
  • 00:16:56.290 --> 00:17:00.120
  • If she's saying nine, why can't I be a ten?
  • 00:17:00.140 --> 00:17:03.070
  • I hope y'all are hearing me tonight.
  • 00:17:05.150 --> 00:17:07.150
  • Why are so few people saying ten?
  • 00:17:08.040 --> 00:17:11.040
  • Are they lying?
  • 00:17:12.020 --> 00:17:14.000
  • Dr. Dee Dee said, "If ten is on the scale,
  • 00:17:16.230 --> 00:17:20.040
  • "then ten is obtainable."
  • 00:17:20.040 --> 00:17:22.180
  • I'm changing my mind about this whole
  • 00:17:26.150 --> 00:17:30.250
  • ideology that nobody's perfect.
  • 00:17:30.250 --> 00:17:33.170
  • They gave me a A plus in school,
  • 00:17:34.220 --> 00:17:37.020
  • but I can't get an A plus in life?
  • 00:17:37.140 --> 00:17:39.220
  • I can't be a ten in life?
  • 00:17:41.100 --> 00:17:43.200
  • Ten is indicating perfect.
  • 00:17:43.240 --> 00:17:45.260
  • Vincent Lombardi said, "Since ten is not obtainable,
  • 00:17:47.120 --> 00:17:52.050
  • "I'll run after ten and I'll catch a
  • 00:17:52.050 --> 00:17:56.190
  • "nine and at least be excellent."
  • 00:17:56.190 --> 00:17:59.050
  • Why isn't it obtainable?
  • 00:18:01.060 --> 00:18:02.250
  • Ask Mary Lou Retton.
  • 00:18:02.250 --> 00:18:04.150
  • When she had to get the ten in the United States Olympics
  • 00:18:04.150 --> 00:18:08.090
  • some years ago, she had to score a ten.
  • 00:18:08.090 --> 00:18:11.140
  • She put it all out there and got a perfect ten.
  • 00:18:11.160 --> 00:18:15.210
  • I'm telling you, we're going to have tens
  • 00:18:15.240 --> 00:18:18.110
  • in this room by this time next year.
  • 00:18:18.110 --> 00:18:24.010
  • (clapping)
  • 00:18:24.010 --> 00:18:26.160
  • I said we're going to have tens.
  • 00:18:27.000 --> 00:18:29.040
  • (clapping and cheering)
  • 00:18:29.040 --> 00:18:32.210
  • Okay, be seated.
  • 00:18:32.210 --> 00:18:34.180
  • Now, here's another part that we got to explore.
  • 00:18:35.000 --> 00:18:39.190
  • How did you come about that number?
  • 00:18:39.190 --> 00:18:42.040
  • How did you come to that number?
  • 00:18:42.200 --> 00:18:46.010
  • What were the categories?
  • 00:18:46.090 --> 00:18:48.220
  • Did you give me a general eight, seven?
  • 00:18:50.030 --> 00:18:54.270
  • Was that number broken down by categories?
  • 00:18:55.190 --> 00:19:00.140
  • If we were to rate your recreational activities,
  • 00:19:01.100 --> 00:19:07.110
  • which is absolutely necessary in a
  • 00:19:08.260 --> 00:19:12.020
  • marriage, what would that number be?
  • 00:19:12.020 --> 00:19:15.030
  • What do you do recreationally that
  • 00:19:16.000 --> 00:19:18.200
  • is helping your relationship become what
  • 00:19:18.200 --> 00:19:21.200
  • God intended for it to become?
  • 00:19:21.200 --> 00:19:24.130
  • How about the romance department?
  • 00:19:25.100 --> 00:19:27.180
  • How about the respect department?
  • 00:19:28.180 --> 00:19:31.080
  • I'm losing my crowd here, baby.
  • 00:19:32.170 --> 00:19:34.090
  • (laughing)
  • 00:19:34.090 --> 00:19:36.040
  • I got these coupons up here.
  • 00:19:36.140 --> 00:19:38.020
  • (laughing)
  • 00:19:38.020 --> 00:19:41.280
  • What are some of the other areas?
  • 00:19:42.280 --> 00:19:44.170
  • We talked about your hobbies.
  • 00:19:45.080 --> 00:19:47.270
  • What do you do together?
  • 00:19:48.220 --> 00:19:50.140
  • Rate your friendship.
  • 00:19:50.140 --> 00:19:52.260
  • When we, sex life.
  • 00:19:57.110 --> 00:20:00.050
  • Dr. Dee Dee: Money.
  • 00:20:01.250 --> 00:20:03.010
  • Dr. Mike: Money.
  • 00:20:03.010 --> 00:20:04.210
  • Dr. Dee Dee: Communication.
  • 00:20:04.210 --> 00:20:05.270
  • Dr. Mike: Communication.
  • 00:20:05.270 --> 00:20:07.140
  • How did you come to this number?
  • 00:20:07.140 --> 00:20:10.230
  • Six, five, seven, eight; how did you get there?
  • 00:20:11.090 --> 00:20:15.110
  • If you compartmentalize, did I say that right?
  • 00:20:17.200 --> 00:20:22.120
  • Dr. Dee Dee: Compartmentalize.
  • 00:20:22.120 --> 00:20:23.170
  • Dr. Mike: Every area of marriage,
  • 00:20:23.170 --> 00:20:27.060
  • did you get that from an overall number?
  • 00:20:27.060 --> 00:20:30.030
  • Where did you get that number from?
  • 00:20:30.230 --> 00:20:32.160
  • There are a lot of people who are
  • 00:20:32.270 --> 00:20:35.060
  • failing in the friendship department.
  • 00:20:35.060 --> 00:20:38.260
  • You just cohabitate.
  • 00:20:40.250 --> 00:20:42.170
  • I'm stepping down.
  • 00:20:44.050 --> 00:20:45.290
  • Talk to them.
  • 00:20:47.250 --> 00:20:48.240
  • Dr. Dee Dee: That's good because
  • 00:20:48.240 --> 00:20:49.250
  • some people will judge or come up
  • 00:20:49.250 --> 00:20:51.290
  • with that number based upon the
  • 00:20:51.290 --> 00:20:54.090
  • mate and not the relationship.
  • 00:20:54.090 --> 00:20:56.100
  • Dr. Mike: I didn't get that.
  • 00:20:58.030 --> 00:20:59.230
  • Dr. Dee Dee: You gave your mate the score
  • 00:20:59.280 --> 00:21:02.050
  • opposed to your relationship the score.
  • 00:21:02.050 --> 00:21:04.180
  • You wanted to send a message.
  • 00:21:05.070 --> 00:21:07.000
  • Dr. Mike: Look, I said I'm giving out the coupons.
  • 00:21:10.020 --> 00:21:12.220
  • (laughing)
  • 00:21:12.220 --> 00:21:16.050
  • How does that fluctuate?
  • 00:21:25.230 --> 00:21:27.270
  • Are you a ten one day, a nine the next day?
  • 00:21:28.130 --> 00:21:33.140
  • Eight on the next day; is this constant?
  • 00:21:34.120 --> 00:21:37.090
  • Here's an exercise for every last couple here.
  • 00:21:39.270 --> 00:21:43.180
  • Use your travel time on the way home,
  • 00:21:45.040 --> 00:21:48.270
  • for instance, and discuss your number.
  • 00:21:48.270 --> 00:21:52.120
  • Where did you get eight from?
  • 00:21:52.120 --> 00:21:55.220
  • (laughing)
  • 00:21:55.220 --> 00:21:58.160
  • Turn to your neighbor and say,
  • 00:21:58.260 --> 00:22:00.030
  • "We come here to fix the thing, not."
  • 00:22:00.030 --> 00:22:02.030
  • (laughing)
  • 00:22:02.030 --> 00:22:05.000
  • There we go; we got an argument.
  • 00:22:05.100 --> 00:22:07.060
  • (laughing)
  • 00:22:07.060 --> 00:22:09.250
  • How can you rate yourselves as eight,
  • 00:22:10.020 --> 00:22:14.200
  • and you can't talk about everything?
  • 00:22:14.200 --> 00:22:17.080
  • What areas?
  • 00:22:21.090 --> 00:22:22.170
  • This exercise alone can bring you to the table.
  • 00:22:22.250 --> 00:22:29.180
  • Can get you in the place where you're sitting down,
  • 00:22:30.210 --> 00:22:34.080
  • and you're discussing just this.
  • 00:22:34.080 --> 00:22:37.060
  • I'm telling you, there's so much growth
  • 00:22:37.120 --> 00:22:39.250
  • locked into this one exercise,
  • 00:22:39.250 --> 00:22:42.110
  • where you can take one day out of each week,
  • 00:22:42.110 --> 00:22:46.160
  • watch this, and talk about specifically
  • 00:22:46.160 --> 00:22:50.140
  • one category of that overall number.
  • 00:22:50.140 --> 00:22:53.240
  • How about your respect towards me?
  • 00:22:54.010 --> 00:22:56.250
  • How much do you really honor who I am?
  • 00:23:00.140 --> 00:23:03.270
  • All of this has to be understood based
  • 00:23:05.170 --> 00:23:09.180
  • upon how much you value covenant.
  • 00:23:09.180 --> 00:23:13.170
  • Here we go, ladies and gentlemen.
  • 00:23:16.070 --> 00:23:17.290
  • Value is the product of information,
  • 00:23:17.290 --> 00:23:22.050
  • interest, and importance.
  • 00:23:22.050 --> 00:23:24.230
  • What did I just say?
  • 00:23:24.230 --> 00:23:25.280
  • Congregation: Value is the product of
  • 00:23:25.280 --> 00:23:27.160
  • information, interest, and importance.
  • 00:23:27.160 --> 00:23:31.140
  • Dr. Mike: If you're not getting information
  • 00:23:31.220 --> 00:23:33.260
  • from one another concerning your
  • 00:23:33.260 --> 00:23:36.280
  • relationship, you don't value it much.
  • 00:23:36.280 --> 00:23:40.130
  • Lord, Jesus, y'all better take this.
  • 00:23:44.130 --> 00:23:46.190
  • I'm tired of being the only one taking the hit.
  • 00:23:46.220 --> 00:23:48.270
  • (laughing)
  • 00:23:48.270 --> 00:23:51.060
  • You should see them looking at me, baby.
  • 00:23:51.140 --> 00:23:53.060
  • Go get them, champ.
  • 00:23:53.280 --> 00:23:55.130
  • (laughing)
  • 00:23:55.130 --> 00:23:57.170
  • Dr. Dee Dee: No value, just throw me out there.
  • 00:23:57.170 --> 00:24:00.030
  • Dr. Mike: The alarm went off the other night
  • 00:24:03.030 --> 00:24:05.040
  • I'm laying in the bed; she's laying in the bed.
  • 00:24:06.260 --> 00:24:10.070
  • She said, "Well, aren't you going to go see?"
  • 00:24:11.060 --> 00:24:13.150
  • (laughing)
  • 00:24:13.150 --> 00:24:15.100
  • I said, "Why do I have to go see?"
  • 00:24:15.100 --> 00:24:17.050
  • (laughing)
  • 00:24:17.050 --> 00:24:18.240
  • Why don't you get out there?
  • 00:24:18.240 --> 00:24:20.270
  • Brother Wilbur, where's Brother Wilbur?
  • 00:24:26.150 --> 00:24:28.070
  • Brother Wilbur proposed and introduced
  • 00:24:28.200 --> 00:24:33.090
  • that to us on Monday when we began to talk about
  • 00:24:33.090 --> 00:24:37.140
  • how much do you value covenant.
  • 00:24:37.140 --> 00:24:40.200
  • Value will eliminate divorce.
  • 00:24:42.210 --> 00:24:45.170
  • How much you value this will determine
  • 00:24:48.250 --> 00:24:52.160
  • how long you will stay in it.
  • 00:24:52.160 --> 00:24:54.270
  • I value covenant so much it's, watch this,
  • 00:24:55.230 --> 00:24:59.110
  • that Dee Dee and I are not getting out of this alive.
  • 00:24:59.110 --> 00:25:03.030
  • (clapping)
  • 00:25:03.030 --> 00:25:07.130
  • That doesn't mean I'm going to kill it.
  • 00:25:07.130 --> 00:25:09.060
  • Some of y'all looking.
  • 00:25:10.000 --> 00:25:11.070
  • That simply means I value what God
  • 00:25:13.180 --> 00:25:17.260
  • has put together, even unto death.
  • 00:25:17.260 --> 00:25:22.260
  • It doesn't matter how we're getting along with one another.
  • 00:25:24.160 --> 00:25:29.190
  • What matters the most is that I value
  • 00:25:29.190 --> 00:25:32.160
  • covenant and I'm going to fix it.
  • 00:25:32.160 --> 00:25:35.110
  • I'm going to fix it.
  • 00:25:35.110 --> 00:25:36.260
  • Dee Dee I'm going to fix it.
  • 00:25:36.260 --> 00:25:38.130
  • You just tell me what I need to do.
  • 00:25:38.130 --> 00:25:40.150
  • I'm going to fix this.
  • 00:25:40.150 --> 00:25:42.030
  • If I got a six, listen, next month
  • 00:25:42.080 --> 00:25:45.150
  • you going to tell me I got a seven.
  • 00:25:45.150 --> 00:25:48.000
  • No, I'm turned up.
  • 00:25:50.010 --> 00:25:51.170
  • I'm on the grind.
  • 00:25:52.060 --> 00:25:54.070
  • There's nothing more important to me than family.
  • 00:25:54.160 --> 00:25:58.270
  • (clapping)
  • 00:25:58.270 --> 00:26:02.050
  • You got to use even priority as a category.
  • 00:26:03.180 --> 00:26:08.240
  • How much do you prioritize her?
  • 00:26:11.070 --> 00:26:14.180
  • Dee Dee said, "What are you going to do today?"
  • 00:26:17.050 --> 00:26:19.030
  • Automatically in my mind, it's like,
  • 00:26:20.040 --> 00:26:23.150
  • "Oh, what, nothing; you want me to do something?"
  • 00:26:24.000 --> 00:26:27.200
  • I'm erasing and eradicating everything
  • 00:26:28.030 --> 00:26:33.050
  • that's on my agenda to convey to her,
  • 00:26:33.050 --> 00:26:36.180
  • in every way, you are numero uno.
  • 00:26:36.180 --> 00:26:41.210
  • (upbeat guitar and drum music)
  • 00:26:42.220 --> 00:26:48.060
  • Voiceover: Thank you for viewing marriage made easy.
  • 00:26:49.180 --> 00:26:52.050
  • If you would like to obtain a copy of today's
  • 00:26:52.050 --> 00:26:54.060
  • lesson or any other featured item,
  • 00:26:54.060 --> 00:26:56.210
  • please give us a call at 1-888-630-4540.
  • 00:26:56.210 --> 00:27:03.030
  • Voiceover: We came to give God some praise.
  • 00:27:11.070 --> 00:27:13.070
  • Voiceover: Michael Freeman presents
  • 00:27:16.120 --> 00:27:17.160
  • Voices of Faith and Praise and their
  • 00:27:17.160 --> 00:27:19.270
  • much anticipated debut CD worship experience, We Win.
  • 00:27:19.270 --> 00:27:25.030
  • (upbeat gospel music)
  • 00:27:25.030 --> 00:27:33.160
  • Twelve powerful and anointed songs.
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  • Featuring Grammy award winning,
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  • gospel recording artist Karen Clark Sheard.
  • 00:27:37.240 --> 00:27:41.090
  • (upbeat gospel music)
  • 00:27:41.110 --> 00:27:49.230
  • We Win is guaranteed to give you
  • 00:27:49.230 --> 00:27:51.140
  • an encounter with God that will cause
  • 00:27:51.140 --> 00:27:53.210
  • an unforgettable experience.
  • 00:27:53.210 --> 00:27:55.240
  • Rob: Whatever it is that you're going through,
  • 00:27:56.010 --> 00:27:57.020
  • just understand that you win.
  • 00:27:57.020 --> 00:27:58.160
  • At the end of the day, get it in your mind that you win.
  • 00:27:58.160 --> 00:28:00.230
  • It's going to manifest.
  • 00:28:00.230 --> 00:28:02.100
  • Dr. Mike: Some people you got to convince that they win.
  • 00:28:02.100 --> 00:28:04.210
  • I already know we win.
  • 00:28:04.210 --> 00:28:06.130
  • That song just resonated.
  • 00:28:06.130 --> 00:28:08.250
  • Voiceover: Order your copy today at 888-630-4540.
  • 00:28:11.240 --> 00:28:17.240
  • That's 1-888-630-4540.
  • 00:28:17.240 --> 00:28:22.230
  • (upbeat gospel music)
  • 00:28:22.230 --> 00:28:23.230