Marriage Made EZ: The Mary Mary Story | TBN
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Marriage Made EZ: The Mary Mary Story

Watch Marriage Made EZ: The Mary Mary Story
July 2, 2017
28:32

Living by Faith with Mike & DeeDee Freeman

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Marriage Made EZ: The Mary Mary Story

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  • Bring it back on in.
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  • Balance and being - I love you all.
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  • I love y'all.
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  • - You know, famous and everyone calling your name
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  • and people carrying your purse and they don't want you to
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  • bump into nothing.
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  • And then coming home and being fully mom.
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  • - [Tina] A servant.
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  • - Sometimes you think you're doing a good job
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  • but as moms I would take care of the house
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  • and the kids and then be like, oh, okay okay, now
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  • it's your time.
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  • And I had to kinda learn how to make sure I gave him
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  • his time - Wow.
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  • - And not be so engrossed in my kids.
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  • Today, on Living by Faith...
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  • - Come on, give it up, guys.
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  • (cheering)
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  • Wow.
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  • Wow, yeah have a seat.
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  • You all are just like the bomb.com.
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  • Isn't that what they say?
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  • You guys are so - Thank you, sir.
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  • - Amazing.
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  • I would like to just hear... - Wow, thank you.
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  • But first of all, welcome and thank you
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  • for consenting. - Yeah, thank you, yes.
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  • - Aren't you glad they're here?
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  • (cheering) (applause)
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  • And y'all don't know this but we gone sing tonight.
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  • - [Erica] Yes, indeed.
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  • - Dee Dee and I going join.
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  • No, Terry, you guys, y'all can't be a part of this.
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  • (laughs)
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  • This is gone Mary Mary and Dee Dee and I.
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  • - [Erica] Yes!
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  • That's that information - You gone sing the bass.
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  • - In your heart. - Yeah.
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  • I luh God.
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  • (laughs)
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  • - [Tina] Look like you ready.
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  • - (laughing) Yeah.
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  • (laughs)
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  • I am so.
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  • No, I'm really thrilled, man
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  • to see
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  • what
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  • God
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  • has been doing
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  • in
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  • your
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  • lives.
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  • And just see the successes that have been
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  • over
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  • and
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  • over
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  • and over again.
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  • And to watch your progression over the years and to know
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  • you are and you're sittin' right here with little old
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  • Dee Dee and I.
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  • - No, ain't nothin' little about you.
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  • (laughs)
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  • Listen, I've watched the
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  • DVDs and I follow you guys on social media.
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  • You guys are really great great examples.
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  • I love this.
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  • When we got the call we were like, yes absolutely because we
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  • believe in marriage.
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  • I believe it's God's design.
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  • I believe that there is not enough conversations like this
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  • to help people stay healthily married.
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  • I just made that up, healthily not really a word but I
  • 00:02:54.270 --> 00:02:56.180
  • made it up.
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  • - I like it. - You like it?
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  • Healthily.
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  • - What was the word?
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  • - Healthily married.
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  • - Healthily married. - I like that.
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  • I like that.
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  • - [Erica] Tina, don't do that.
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  • - Come on, turn to your spouse say, let's
  • 00:03:04.040 --> 00:03:05.030
  • remain healthily married.
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  • - [Teddy] Mm-mm, mm-mm, mm-mm, don't do it, don't do it,
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  • don't do it.
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  • (laughs)
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  • - [Tina] It's not healthfully it's healthily?
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  • - Healthily.
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  • Because that's what's lacking.
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  • - [Erica] Yeah.
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  • - Healthy marriages. - Yeah.
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  • - Wow, I...
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  • - Wait, wait, baby, she hadn't finished.
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  • - Okay, go 'head, go 'head.
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  • - I love them. - This is gone be great.
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  • - Our Bishop, - This gone be good.
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  • Bishop Kenneth Olmer was up and I believe it was a
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  • - Oh, I love him.
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  • - Father's day and he stood up and he said, "I was taught to
  • 00:03:28.180 --> 00:03:31.290
  • "be an excellent preacher.
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  • "I'm a great preacher."
  • 00:03:33.240 --> 00:03:34.260
  • - Come on, come on.
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  • - He said, "But I was never taught to be a great husband."
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  • And he's on his third marriage but he had his children to
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  • stand up and he apologized - Oh wow.
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  • - To his children
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  • for not having learned.
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  • And it was the most beautiful thing to be in a church like
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  • that and watch how much he cared and nurtured for
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  • family and
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  • to learn so much from him.
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  • I'm just honored to be able to share, you know, the things
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  • that we've dealt with and been through.
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  • And, you know, if it can help somebody then to God
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  • be the glory.
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  • - Absolutely.
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  • So, Dee Dee, you were about to say.
  • 00:04:04.150 --> 00:04:05.220
  • - Yeah I was gone say, just kinda
  • 00:04:05.220 --> 00:04:08.270
  • piggy back off of something you were saying about all of
  • 00:04:08.270 --> 00:04:11.180
  • their accolades and - Yeah, yeah.
  • 00:04:11.180 --> 00:04:12.250
  • - How all of their accomplishments.
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  • Because, you know, both of you have been very successful
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  • in your own professional arenas, right?
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  • And
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  • that pressure could be
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  • you know,
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  • quite real, I guess, in your private arenas because you know
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  • it's like you wanna be successful in everything.
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  • - Yeah.
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  • - So has that ever been a pressure to you, if you ever had,
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  • like you know, you've been successful over here and then
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  • you come home and you have challenges.
  • 00:04:38.160 --> 00:04:40.030
  • And it makes you feel like, okay, why am I succeeding here
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  • and not succeeding like I want to here?
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  • Have you ever had those kind...
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  • Well I know you have made yours quite public.
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  • - Right.
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  • - You have, y'all know so it doesn't...
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  • - [Pastor Freeman] Made what quite public?
  • 00:04:52.250 --> 00:04:55.020
  • - Her challenge.
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  • Her challenges, you know
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  • about her challenge. - What challenge is that?
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  • (laughs)
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  • - Would you like me to talk?
  • 00:04:59.180 --> 00:05:00.150
  • - I just (laughs).
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  • I'm playing with her, she's like.
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  • - No I'm not.
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  • Oh, no I don't have...
  • 00:05:04.070 --> 00:05:05.210
  • No I'm not doing that.
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  • - Yeah. - I'm not.
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  • I would say it.
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  • One thing about us, - That's it.
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  • - I don't know if you know us.
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  • We're very open, honest and direct and straight to the point
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  • because their lives are too precious to us and to God,
  • 00:05:14.080 --> 00:05:17.260
  • first of all. - We heard it in the back.
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  • We was blessed.
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  • - Okay, okay, good.
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  • - [Pastor Freeman] I love it, I love it.
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  • - [Teddy] We feel right at home.
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  • My wife was like, "Oh, so I ain't gotta edit myself?"
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  • - [Pastor Freeman] It's real.
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  • - It's real.
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  • It's real. - It's all real.
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  • I got a question too.
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  • I didn't wanna... - Wait, babe, you
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  • can't, dang,
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  • let them answer.
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  • (laughs)
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  • Takes a sip of water and relax.
  • 00:05:37.130 --> 00:05:38.260
  • - Just that right there is so awesome.
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  • That just blessed me because this is real stuff.
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  • I like that.
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  • I've been doing that to him. - And she does that at home.
  • 00:05:45.180 --> 00:05:47.180
  • - Listen, it's just real stuff so it's awesome
  • 00:05:47.180 --> 00:05:50.020
  • to see that. - Yes.
  • 00:05:50.020 --> 00:05:51.090
  • - We just being husband and wife.
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  • Not necessarily your pastor and your bishop and
  • 00:05:52.220 --> 00:05:53.120
  • all that stuff.
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  • Just, I like that.
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  • - Okay, good. - 'Cause it's normal.
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  • And I think that it's healthy for churches and for people
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  • to see normalcy.
  • 00:05:59.270 --> 00:06:01.150
  • When they see you up there it's like you know, "You're this
  • 00:06:01.150 --> 00:06:04.050
  • "big star and you this."
  • 00:06:04.050 --> 00:06:05.190
  • And when I go home I'm clippin' nails and I'm cleanin' noses
  • 00:06:05.190 --> 00:06:08.000
  • and I'm washin' loads or redoing what the housekeeper did
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  • 'cause I didn't like the way she did the linen cabinet.
  • 00:06:11.270 --> 00:06:14.010
  • Or whatever, running errands, I'm handling my business and
  • 00:06:14.010 --> 00:06:17.110
  • taking care of my house, you know what I mean?
  • 00:06:17.110 --> 00:06:19.010
  • Or he gotta come home and you gotta do what Daddy does.
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  • You know what I'm saying?
  • 00:06:22.080 --> 00:06:23.250
  • I remember hearing about...
  • 00:06:23.250 --> 00:06:25.010
  • - What, wait a minute.
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  • Daddy?
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  • - Oh, Jesus.
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  • - Yeah I calls him Daddy.
  • 00:06:28.090 --> 00:06:29.090
  • - He likes it. - He's Daddy?
  • 00:06:29.090 --> 00:06:30.180
  • - He likes it. - He gotta do what Daddy...
  • 00:06:30.180 --> 00:06:31.200
  • She wasn't referring to what the
  • 00:06:31.200 --> 00:06:33.140
  • kids call him? - No, we don't
  • 00:06:33.140 --> 00:06:34.130
  • agree with that.
  • 00:06:34.130 --> 00:06:35.080
  • - He is Daddy.
  • 00:06:35.080 --> 00:06:36.170
  • - Yeah. - Daddy.
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  • - [Erica] Honey, your daddy went on to be with the Lord.
  • 00:06:38.030 --> 00:06:39.160
  • (laughs)
  • 00:06:39.160 --> 00:06:40.190
  • - I think it started because
  • 00:06:40.190 --> 00:06:42.290
  • she wanted our kids to call me daddy and not by
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  • my first name.
  • 00:06:47.250 --> 00:06:48.230
  • - That's not how it started.
  • 00:06:48.230 --> 00:06:49.210
  • - That's not?
  • 00:06:49.210 --> 00:06:50.180
  • - Oh, okay, well - Oh, oh.
  • 00:06:50.180 --> 00:06:51.180
  • Praise the Lord, tell the people.
  • 00:06:51.180 --> 00:06:52.170
  • - Exclusive. (laughs)
  • 00:06:52.170 --> 00:06:53.240
  • - [Erica] I don't know, do we want this story?
  • 00:06:53.240 --> 00:06:55.150
  • I don't know.
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  • This is church.
  • 00:06:56.200 --> 00:06:57.180
  • - This married people, right?
  • 00:06:57.180 --> 00:06:58.200
  • - [Dee Dee] Yeah, uh-huh.
  • 00:06:58.200 --> 00:07:00.060
  • - You liked it when I called you Daddy so I kept
  • 00:07:00.060 --> 00:07:02.010
  • calling you that.
  • 00:07:02.010 --> 00:07:02.280
  • (laughs)
  • 00:07:02.280 --> 00:07:04.190
  • - Talk away, we'll talk away.
  • 00:07:04.190 --> 00:07:06.150
  • - And then you can use the excuse that, you know, the kids,
  • 00:07:06.150 --> 00:07:09.100
  • you don't want the kids calling.
  • 00:07:09.100 --> 00:07:10.200
  • - Kinda like special.
  • 00:07:10.200 --> 00:07:11.270
  • - That's not really why.
  • 00:07:11.270 --> 00:07:13.060
  • That's not really why.
  • 00:07:13.060 --> 00:07:14.110
  • - Yeah, tell the truth, tell the truth.
  • 00:07:14.110 --> 00:07:15.220
  • - He likes it.
  • 00:07:15.220 --> 00:07:16.290
  • - Erica said, "Why you keep calling him Daddy?
  • 00:07:16.290 --> 00:07:18.000
  • "He's not our daddy."
  • 00:07:18.000 --> 00:07:19.150
  • I said, he ain't your daddy but that's what I'm gonna call
  • 00:07:19.150 --> 00:07:20.250
  • him and you deal with it.
  • 00:07:20.250 --> 00:07:21.280
  • He likes it.
  • 00:07:21.280 --> 00:07:22.230
  • So, I do it.
  • 00:07:22.230 --> 00:07:24.070
  • - You know what, to answer your question, you said how to
  • 00:07:24.070 --> 00:07:26.000
  • balance. (laughs)
  • 00:07:26.000 --> 00:07:27.150
  • - Bring that thing on back in. - Let's move on passed this.
  • 00:07:27.150 --> 00:07:28.210
  • Bring it back on in.
  • 00:07:28.210 --> 00:07:29.170
  • Bring it back on in.
  • 00:07:29.170 --> 00:07:29.290
  • Balance and being - I love you all.
  • 00:07:30.130 --> 00:07:30.290
  • I love y'all.
  • 00:07:30.290 --> 00:07:32.130
  • - You know, famous and everyone calling your name
  • 00:07:32.130 --> 00:07:33.270
  • and people carrying your purse and they don't want you to
  • 00:07:33.270 --> 00:07:35.240
  • bump into nothing.
  • 00:07:35.240 --> 00:07:37.020
  • And then coming home and being fully mom.
  • 00:07:37.020 --> 00:07:39.050
  • - [Tina] A servant.
  • 00:07:39.050 --> 00:07:40.120
  • - Sometimes you think you're doing a good job
  • 00:07:40.120 --> 00:07:43.000
  • but as moms I would take care of the house
  • 00:07:43.000 --> 00:07:45.290
  • and the kids and then be like, oh, okay okay, now
  • 00:07:45.290 --> 00:07:48.240
  • it's your time.
  • 00:07:48.240 --> 00:07:50.080
  • And I had to kinda learn how to make sure I gave him
  • 00:07:50.080 --> 00:07:53.020
  • his time - Wow.
  • 00:07:53.020 --> 00:07:54.070
  • - And not be so engrossed in my kids.
  • 00:07:54.070 --> 00:07:56.080
  • When I had my first daughter I borderline idol worship with
  • 00:07:56.080 --> 00:07:59.190
  • Krista when she - Come on.
  • 00:07:59.190 --> 00:08:00.160
  • - Was first born.
  • 00:08:00.160 --> 00:08:01.110
  • Borderline.
  • 00:08:01.110 --> 00:08:02.090
  • I mean
  • 00:08:03.120 --> 00:08:04.220
  • I was just enamored with my... - Plead idolatry.
  • 00:08:04.220 --> 00:08:06.060
  • I was there.
  • 00:08:06.060 --> 00:08:07.040
  • - Shh, it was not idolatry.
  • 00:08:07.040 --> 00:08:09.020
  • (laughs)
  • 00:08:09.020 --> 00:08:10.110
  • No.
  • 00:08:10.110 --> 00:08:11.060
  • But, you know.
  • 00:08:11.060 --> 00:08:12.100
  • It's constant learning in marriage.
  • 00:08:12.100 --> 00:08:14.240
  • And I don't think he had a...
  • 00:08:14.240 --> 00:08:17.030
  • I want you to pick up your microphone.
  • 00:08:17.030 --> 00:08:18.270
  • - That was a nugget she just dropped, folks.
  • 00:08:18.270 --> 00:08:20.240
  • - Yeah.
  • 00:08:20.240 --> 00:08:21.190
  • - It's constant
  • 00:08:21.190 --> 00:08:23.060
  • learning.
  • 00:08:23.060 --> 00:08:24.010
  • - Yeah. - Yeah.
  • 00:08:24.010 --> 00:08:25.160
  • - I want them
  • 00:08:25.160 --> 00:08:26.290
  • to write down some specifics - Yeah.
  • 00:08:26.290 --> 00:08:29.080
  • - About what you were saying.
  • 00:08:29.080 --> 00:08:31.230
  • Because there're messages inside of everything you're
  • 00:08:31.230 --> 00:08:34.080
  • going to convey.
  • 00:08:34.080 --> 00:08:35.150
  • - We are constantly trying to grow and
  • 00:08:35.150 --> 00:08:37.200
  • understand each other.
  • 00:08:37.200 --> 00:08:39.060
  • I just told him today, we were talking about something and I
  • 00:08:39.060 --> 00:08:40.210
  • was like, I think we have a communication barrier.
  • 00:08:40.210 --> 00:08:43.030
  • Because
  • 00:08:43.030 --> 00:08:44.210
  • he'll say one thing and I'll hear one thing because
  • 00:08:44.210 --> 00:08:46.260
  • sometimes you can't determine what your words make me feel.
  • 00:08:46.260 --> 00:08:51.210
  • And because I'm a woman and I'm sensitive I always lean on
  • 00:08:51.210 --> 00:08:54.080
  • my feelings and he's always going, "But I didn't say that!"
  • 00:08:54.080 --> 00:08:57.270
  • And I said, but I can't control how I felt.
  • 00:08:57.270 --> 00:09:00.030
  • So that is a constant
  • 00:09:00.030 --> 00:09:01.220
  • balance for us.
  • 00:09:01.220 --> 00:09:03.080
  • - I have to remind her that feelings don't have a brain.
  • 00:09:03.080 --> 00:09:06.280
  • You know, you just feel how you feel.
  • 00:09:06.280 --> 00:09:08.100
  • So I want you to hear what I say.
  • 00:09:08.100 --> 00:09:09.260
  • - Now don't invalidate my feelings though, husband.
  • 00:09:09.260 --> 00:09:11.130
  • - I'm not invalidating your feelings I'm just saying.
  • 00:09:11.130 --> 00:09:13.220
  • - So y'all argued before?
  • 00:09:13.220 --> 00:09:15.100
  • (laughs)
  • 00:09:15.100 --> 00:09:16.100
  • They're arguing.
  • 00:09:16.100 --> 00:09:18.020
  • - They are arguing. That's an argument for them.
  • 00:09:18.020 --> 00:09:19.090
  • 'Cause they don't really (laughs)
  • 00:09:19.090 --> 00:09:21.100
  • They don't do that.
  • 00:09:21.100 --> 00:09:22.100
  • (laughs)
  • 00:09:22.100 --> 00:09:24.100
  • I'm honored to see that right now.
  • 00:09:24.100 --> 00:09:27.190
  • I've never experienced that before.
  • 00:09:27.190 --> 00:09:29.200
  • This is awesome.
  • 00:09:29.200 --> 00:09:31.000
  • - We're not very argumentative.
  • 00:09:32.060 --> 00:09:34.020
  • Well we disagree but there's not a lot of yelling.
  • 00:09:34.020 --> 00:09:36.070
  • And I'm a very soft spoken, can you hear my voice?
  • 00:09:36.070 --> 00:09:38.240
  • (laughs)
  • 00:09:38.240 --> 00:09:40.260
  • Soft spoken person. - Drives me insane.
  • 00:09:42.020 --> 00:09:43.180
  • I was upset about something and I was
  • 00:09:43.180 --> 00:09:45.070
  • up here. - Sunday morning before
  • 00:09:45.070 --> 00:09:46.190
  • we go into church.
  • 00:09:46.190 --> 00:09:47.270
  • - Did you have to tell them the day?
  • 00:09:47.270 --> 00:09:48.290
  • - Yes. - They didn't have
  • 00:09:48.290 --> 00:09:50.050
  • to know the day. - Tell the truth and
  • 00:09:50.050 --> 00:09:50.250
  • shame the devil!
  • 00:09:50.250 --> 00:09:52.010
  • - That's where stuff jump off. - Tell it!
  • 00:09:52.010 --> 00:09:52.290
  • - I was up here. - Stuff jump
  • 00:09:52.290 --> 00:09:54.060
  • off Sunday morning. - Sunday morning.
  • 00:09:54.060 --> 00:09:55.160
  • - And I got to preach.
  • 00:09:55.160 --> 00:09:57.080
  • - But I apologized and repented to you
  • 00:09:57.080 --> 00:09:59.000
  • on the car. - After church.
  • 00:09:59.000 --> 00:10:00.050
  • - No, in the car because I realized...
  • 00:10:00.050 --> 00:10:01.170
  • - And after church, hallelujah.
  • 00:10:01.170 --> 00:10:03.150
  • (laughs)
  • 00:10:03.150 --> 00:10:04.150
  • But keep going, keep going.
  • 00:10:04.150 --> 00:10:06.130
  • - No, I realized that the enemy was using me at that time.
  • 00:10:06.130 --> 00:10:08.270
  • Sometimes he's talking right about being in your emotions
  • 00:10:08.270 --> 00:10:11.160
  • and you know, whatever I was talking.
  • 00:10:11.160 --> 00:10:13.010
  • Maybe he was rushing me, I was going too slow, I don't know
  • 00:10:13.010 --> 00:10:14.290
  • what it was but I got upset about it.
  • 00:10:14.290 --> 00:10:17.010
  • This when we first started our church and I wasn't really
  • 00:10:17.010 --> 00:10:19.150
  • fully onboard as a...
  • 00:10:19.150 --> 00:10:21.030
  • - She wasn't a member yet.
  • 00:10:21.030 --> 00:10:22.160
  • - First. - Of the church.
  • 00:10:22.160 --> 00:10:23.260
  • - I mean I married a producer.
  • 00:10:23.260 --> 00:10:26.240
  • I said, Lord I want him to love God but I want him to be
  • 00:10:26.240 --> 00:10:28.200
  • kind of thuggish a little bit so he can pray and fight.
  • 00:10:28.200 --> 00:10:31.130
  • You know?
  • 00:10:31.130 --> 00:10:32.080
  • I don't want a preacher.
  • 00:10:32.080 --> 00:10:34.040
  • And then he started going to seminary so we started this
  • 00:10:34.040 --> 00:10:35.190
  • church and I'm like, okay we going to your church.
  • 00:10:35.190 --> 00:10:38.150
  • And I had the wrong spirit.
  • 00:10:38.150 --> 00:10:40.000
  • (laughs)
  • 00:10:40.000 --> 00:10:41.210
  • But God got me together but what I never wanted to be, I
  • 00:10:41.210 --> 00:10:44.220
  • never wanna be a hindrance to the ministry of God.
  • 00:10:44.220 --> 00:10:47.180
  • - I love that.
  • 00:10:47.180 --> 00:10:48.230
  • - I always get myself out of the way.
  • 00:10:48.230 --> 00:10:50.080
  • So I got my attitude and once I got quiet with my thoughts
  • 00:10:50.080 --> 00:10:53.020
  • the Holy Ghost got on my case.
  • 00:10:53.020 --> 00:10:54.170
  • "You really gone do that to this man before he have to go
  • 00:10:54.170 --> 00:10:55.180
  • "preach the Word of God?"
  • 00:10:55.180 --> 00:10:57.130
  • So I hung my head low and I was like, husband
  • 00:10:57.130 --> 00:10:59.120
  • please forgive me.
  • 00:10:59.120 --> 00:11:00.210
  • I'm so so sorry.
  • 00:11:00.210 --> 00:11:02.010
  • And we stopped and we prayed.
  • 00:11:02.010 --> 00:11:03.180
  • And then I apologized again in the car and then while he was
  • 00:11:03.180 --> 00:11:05.280
  • up preaching I was praying and rebuking myself for being an
  • 00:11:05.280 --> 00:11:08.230
  • ignorant woman for fussing at the man before he has
  • 00:11:08.230 --> 00:11:12.020
  • to go preach.
  • 00:11:12.020 --> 00:11:13.150
  • - The thing is that y'all writing stuff down.
  • 00:11:13.150 --> 00:11:15.040
  • I wanted to quickly say that that was
  • 00:11:15.040 --> 00:11:18.060
  • ongoing forgiveness.
  • 00:11:19.290 --> 00:11:21.180
  • You have to have that.
  • 00:11:21.180 --> 00:11:22.220
  • It has to be constant.
  • 00:11:22.220 --> 00:11:24.140
  • I'm talking like forgive for the very smallest thing.
  • 00:11:24.140 --> 00:11:27.140
  • Because if you don't it'll harden your heart.
  • 00:11:27.140 --> 00:11:30.190
  • It'll turn to bitterness. - Absolutely.
  • 00:11:30.190 --> 00:11:34.020
  • - I mean you'll literally dislike that person.
  • 00:11:34.020 --> 00:11:36.250
  • - Yeah. - And you don't
  • 00:11:36.250 --> 00:11:38.070
  • even know why but it's something small that you didn't
  • 00:11:38.070 --> 00:11:39.240
  • forgive them for earlier that day.
  • 00:11:39.240 --> 00:11:42.020
  • So you gotta keep forgiving.
  • 00:11:42.020 --> 00:11:43.120
  • I'm talking like
  • 00:11:43.120 --> 00:11:44.110
  • you didn't pick the toothpaste.
  • 00:11:44.110 --> 00:11:46.150
  • I'm sorry baby, I'm sorry I didn't do that.
  • 00:11:46.150 --> 00:11:49.060
  • You know and ask, would you please forgive me for that?
  • 00:11:49.060 --> 00:11:51.220
  • Constantly, every single time you may thing you
  • 00:11:51.220 --> 00:11:53.270
  • did something wrong.
  • 00:11:53.270 --> 00:11:55.180
  • Ask for forgiveness.
  • 00:11:55.180 --> 00:11:56.250
  • Constantly, every single day.
  • 00:11:56.250 --> 00:11:58.020
  • So that was good.
  • 00:11:58.020 --> 00:11:59.020
  • - I wanna interject with that.
  • 00:11:59.020 --> 00:12:01.070
  • It's so funny.
  • 00:12:01.070 --> 00:12:02.230
  • For you all who don't know, my husband and I went through
  • 00:12:02.230 --> 00:12:04.080
  • infidelity publicly in our marriage and it was countless
  • 00:12:04.080 --> 00:12:07.070
  • years and countless situations.
  • 00:12:07.070 --> 00:12:09.020
  • And I first lost my mind and tried to kill him and wanted
  • 00:12:09.020 --> 00:12:11.030
  • to kill everybody and.
  • 00:12:11.030 --> 00:12:12.170
  • You know what I'm saying, I'm gonna go out bad and just,
  • 00:12:12.170 --> 00:12:14.100
  • you know, I'm just gonna embarrass God.
  • 00:12:14.100 --> 00:12:15.260
  • And I'm gonna kill everybody, I'mma die and go to hell.
  • 00:12:15.260 --> 00:12:17.070
  • Send my kids to heaven.
  • 00:12:17.070 --> 00:12:18.150
  • (laughs)
  • 00:12:18.150 --> 00:12:19.280
  • That was the kind of foolishness that I was on.
  • 00:12:19.280 --> 00:12:21.050
  • - [Pastor Freeman] All this real though, Tina?
  • 00:12:21.050 --> 00:12:22.210
  • - Oh, heck yeah.
  • 00:12:22.210 --> 00:12:24.060
  • I was dead serious and I said, God if you don't help me I'm
  • 00:12:24.060 --> 00:12:26.080
  • going embarrass you and you know these people know me
  • 00:12:26.080 --> 00:12:28.000
  • as Mary Mary.
  • 00:12:28.000 --> 00:12:29.080
  • So you're gonna look bad if you don't save me and
  • 00:12:29.080 --> 00:12:31.100
  • if I'm going to hell I ain't going alone, I'm taking a
  • 00:12:31.100 --> 00:12:34.010
  • crew with me.
  • 00:12:34.010 --> 00:12:35.120
  • (laughs)
  • 00:12:35.120 --> 00:12:37.140
  • And then, you know I couldn't leave a legacy of suicide.
  • 00:12:38.260 --> 00:12:41.010
  • This is real talk. (laughs)
  • 00:12:41.010 --> 00:12:44.270
  • I couldn't leave the legacy of suicide to my children so I
  • 00:12:44.270 --> 00:12:47.260
  • was just like, well I'mma send 'em to heaven.
  • 00:12:47.260 --> 00:12:49.250
  • And the only thing that kept me from doing it, 'cause I was
  • 00:12:49.250 --> 00:12:51.170
  • saying what if it don't work?
  • 00:12:51.170 --> 00:12:53.140
  • And one of them is left here and they gotta remember that
  • 00:12:53.140 --> 00:12:55.240
  • I did this?
  • 00:12:55.240 --> 00:12:57.110
  • So that was what was messing me up, you know what I mean?
  • 00:12:57.110 --> 00:12:58.200
  • And if I would've killed myself I'd have forfeit
  • 00:12:58.200 --> 00:13:00.240
  • insurance for them. - No, wait a minute.
  • 00:13:00.240 --> 00:13:01.280
  • Wait a minute. - Sin come with a whole
  • 00:13:01.280 --> 00:13:02.270
  • lot of ignorance, it was crazy.
  • 00:13:02.270 --> 00:13:04.040
  • Sin come with a whole lot of ignorance.
  • 00:13:04.040 --> 00:13:05.070
  • - No, I mean you processing
  • 00:13:05.070 --> 00:13:06.170
  • all of these? - Yes, I had given myself
  • 00:13:06.170 --> 00:13:07.160
  • to the devil.
  • 00:13:07.160 --> 00:13:08.110
  • I was mad at God.
  • 00:13:08.110 --> 00:13:09.240
  • I was like, I'm out here singing for you, I'm out here
  • 00:13:09.240 --> 00:13:10.260
  • living for you.
  • 00:13:10.260 --> 00:13:12.000
  • I ain't never cheated on my husband.
  • 00:13:12.000 --> 00:13:13.130
  • I ain't been the most perfect woman but, you know I'm
  • 00:13:13.130 --> 00:13:14.230
  • good to him.
  • 00:13:14.230 --> 00:13:16.000
  • Like, why does this have to happen to me?
  • 00:13:16.000 --> 00:13:16.280
  • Why was I blind to see it?
  • 00:13:16.280 --> 00:13:18.140
  • And then my ego was crushed because I was like, I was so
  • 00:13:18.140 --> 00:13:20.020
  • stupid and blind that I didn't see it?
  • 00:13:20.020 --> 00:13:21.220
  • And I have talked about those kinda women my whole life.
  • 00:13:21.220 --> 00:13:23.240
  • Now I'm one of them.
  • 00:13:23.240 --> 00:13:25.020
  • So I was just all kinda crushed.
  • 00:13:25.020 --> 00:13:27.130
  • And so
  • 00:13:27.130 --> 00:13:28.140
  • I couldn't deal.
  • 00:13:28.140 --> 00:13:29.200
  • I'm a thinker.
  • 00:13:29.200 --> 00:13:30.260
  • So I couldn't deal with all of the thoughts.
  • 00:13:30.260 --> 00:13:32.160
  • The devil was tormenting me because I let him in.
  • 00:13:32.160 --> 00:13:34.130
  • I was angry and was mad and with my mouth I just denied God
  • 00:13:34.130 --> 00:13:38.200
  • and I denounced him.
  • 00:13:38.200 --> 00:13:40.060
  • So I was like, devil you can have me, God don't want me.
  • 00:13:40.060 --> 00:13:41.150
  • Look what he done did.
  • 00:13:41.150 --> 00:13:42.220
  • And when I tell you the devil came in.
  • 00:13:42.220 --> 00:13:44.020
  • My face was disfigured.
  • 00:13:44.020 --> 00:13:46.140
  • My face just felt like it was...
  • 00:13:46.140 --> 00:13:48.090
  • - Is she telling the truth? - Real talk.
  • 00:13:48.090 --> 00:13:49.230
  • - She's telling the absolute truth.
  • 00:13:49.230 --> 00:13:51.070
  • One of the times I was on the phone with my sister and I
  • 00:13:51.070 --> 00:13:54.020
  • could hear
  • 00:13:54.020 --> 00:13:55.110
  • the devil in her voice.
  • 00:13:55.110 --> 00:13:56.280
  • Her voice got heavy and dark.
  • 00:13:56.280 --> 00:13:58.200
  • And in the middle of the conversation I said, Tina turn
  • 00:13:58.200 --> 00:14:01.100
  • around you're going too far it's too dark!
  • 00:14:01.100 --> 00:14:03.260
  • - She said, "Come back!"
  • 00:14:03.260 --> 00:14:05.150
  • And I just stopped. - And she got quiet.
  • 00:14:05.150 --> 00:14:07.120
  • But she was going, "I hate him and I'mma do this, and
  • 00:14:07.120 --> 00:14:09.060
  • "I'mma do this."
  • 00:14:09.060 --> 00:14:10.210
  • And I was going, that's not Tina that's the enemy.
  • 00:14:10.210 --> 00:14:12.060
  • - It was the devil. - And so we actually
  • 00:14:12.060 --> 00:14:13.200
  • started a constant prayer line with our family.
  • 00:14:13.200 --> 00:14:15.100
  • - Come on, come on.
  • 00:14:15.100 --> 00:14:16.080
  • - [Erica] To morning and night.
  • 00:14:16.080 --> 00:14:17.070
  • That still goes on today.
  • 00:14:17.070 --> 00:14:18.130
  • 7:30 in the morning. - Yeah.
  • 00:14:18.130 --> 00:14:19.200
  • - 6:10 at night.
  • 00:14:19.200 --> 00:14:21.050
  • And we pray for marriages, we pray for them constantly.
  • 00:14:21.050 --> 00:14:23.040
  • We fasted for them. - Prayed for real.
  • 00:14:23.040 --> 00:14:24.180
  • - We went over there. (audience claps)
  • 00:14:24.180 --> 00:14:25.160
  • My sister, Holy Ghost Shanta,
  • 00:14:25.160 --> 00:14:27.200
  • she would go over and Tina would be upset and you know,
  • 00:14:27.200 --> 00:14:31.130
  • she'd be goin' off and we'd be walking around speaking in
  • 00:14:31.130 --> 00:14:33.170
  • tongues and praying in the spirit and sometimes we'd have
  • 00:14:33.170 --> 00:14:36.020
  • to sweep up glass.
  • 00:14:36.020 --> 00:14:37.090
  • And she'd be going on throwin' it.
  • 00:14:37.090 --> 00:14:39.160
  • And we're just standing back, "Father God in the name of
  • 00:14:39.160 --> 00:14:41.150
  • "Jesus bring her down."
  • 00:14:41.150 --> 00:14:42.210
  • - But they couldn't pray in English.
  • 00:14:42.210 --> 00:14:44.050
  • They'd have to pray in the spirit and they had to to pray
  • 00:14:44.050 --> 00:14:44.290
  • under they breath.
  • 00:14:44.290 --> 00:14:46.150
  • - We were sweeping stuff. - Because if they gave me
  • 00:14:46.150 --> 00:14:47.220
  • anything to fight and attack I would.
  • 00:14:47.220 --> 00:14:49.060
  • But I couldn't fight with the silent Holy Ghost.
  • 00:14:49.060 --> 00:14:50.280
  • I couldn't fight with that wise Holy Ghost.
  • 00:14:50.280 --> 00:14:52.200
  • So, you know, I had some sisters that was always
  • 00:14:52.200 --> 00:14:55.020
  • kinda giving me...
  • 00:14:55.020 --> 00:14:56.170
  • Now I knew I was crazy but I didn't want you to confirm it.
  • 00:14:56.170 --> 00:14:58.290
  • I didn't really want you to.
  • 00:14:58.290 --> 00:15:00.100
  • I just wanted you to leave me alone.
  • 00:15:00.100 --> 00:15:01.260
  • I knew I was crazy but work with me, you got so much Holy
  • 00:15:01.260 --> 00:15:03.090
  • Ghost, pray this crazy off of me, right?
  • 00:15:03.090 --> 00:15:05.000
  • - [Dee Dee] Right.
  • 00:15:05.000 --> 00:15:05.250
  • (laughs)
  • 00:15:05.250 --> 00:15:07.160
  • - My sisters who were wise
  • 00:15:07.160 --> 00:15:09.180
  • they would come and they would pray in the spirit up
  • 00:15:09.180 --> 00:15:11.120
  • under their breath.
  • 00:15:11.120 --> 00:15:12.270
  • But let me tell you how much the devil knows God.
  • 00:15:12.270 --> 00:15:15.160
  • - Come on.
  • 00:15:15.160 --> 00:15:16.230
  • - The demons in me knew that they were praying
  • 00:15:16.230 --> 00:15:18.190
  • in the spirit.
  • 00:15:18.190 --> 00:15:19.270
  • Their mouth wasn't moving or nothing.
  • 00:15:19.270 --> 00:15:21.130
  • And when they would pray in the spirit it would call me
  • 00:15:21.130 --> 00:15:22.290
  • and the devil inside of me had to be subject to them.
  • 00:15:22.290 --> 00:15:25.100
  • You might not be able to cast the devil out of somebody
  • 00:15:25.100 --> 00:15:26.290
  • who don't want that devil to go but you can make that devil
  • 00:15:26.290 --> 00:15:29.000
  • subject to the Holy Ghost in you.
  • 00:15:29.000 --> 00:15:31.160
  • Because my sisters did it.
  • 00:15:31.160 --> 00:15:33.090
  • But I wanna go back to what I was saying.
  • 00:15:33.090 --> 00:15:35.110
  • So we went through infidelity.
  • 00:15:35.110 --> 00:15:37.010
  • I could forgive that, right?
  • 00:15:37.010 --> 00:15:39.050
  • But I didn't realize.
  • 00:15:39.050 --> 00:15:40.150
  • I ended up forgiving that, it wasn't easy.
  • 00:15:40.150 --> 00:15:42.030
  • But you know, I went to God.
  • 00:15:42.030 --> 00:15:43.170
  • And I was either, God I'mma die and kill everybody or I'mma
  • 00:15:43.170 --> 00:15:46.020
  • forgive this man and I'mma forgive him all the way.
  • 00:15:46.020 --> 00:15:47.180
  • But you gotta do it.
  • 00:15:47.180 --> 00:15:49.040
  • I was like if you are real, I'm giving myself completely
  • 00:15:49.040 --> 00:15:51.150
  • and totally to you.
  • 00:15:51.150 --> 00:15:52.290
  • I throw away everything I've ever known, everything.
  • 00:15:52.290 --> 00:15:54.090
  • I repent.
  • 00:15:54.090 --> 00:15:55.240
  • What are you trying to teach me in this moment, I wanna
  • 00:15:55.240 --> 00:15:58.020
  • learn and I wanna forgive entirely, right?
  • 00:15:58.020 --> 00:16:01.090
  • But I realized after the fact that I hadn't forgiven him
  • 00:16:01.090 --> 00:16:03.280
  • for the little stuff.
  • 00:16:03.280 --> 00:16:05.160
  • When I became aware, it's like you go to God for cancer but
  • 00:16:05.160 --> 00:16:07.260
  • you don't go to God for a cold, right?
  • 00:16:07.260 --> 00:16:10.240
  • So it's like I forgave all this infidelity
  • 00:16:10.240 --> 00:16:13.040
  • - Yeah, yeah.
  • 00:16:13.040 --> 00:16:14.180
  • - But I didn't forgive the times that I thought he didn't
  • 00:16:14.180 --> 00:16:17.010
  • stand up for me with his mother.
  • 00:16:17.010 --> 00:16:19.190
  • I didn't forgive all the times that I felt like I was
  • 00:16:19.190 --> 00:16:22.030
  • carrying more of the responsibilities.
  • 00:16:22.030 --> 00:16:25.160
  • Not financial but all of the workload with the children.
  • 00:16:25.160 --> 00:16:27.150
  • I had resented him because he got to have fun with the kids
  • 00:16:27.150 --> 00:16:31.100
  • and I had to do all of the tasks associated with it.
  • 00:16:31.100 --> 00:16:33.230
  • I didn't forgive that.
  • 00:16:33.230 --> 00:16:35.180
  • I didn't.
  • 00:16:35.180 --> 00:16:37.030
  • And I was still mad about that two years after I had gotten
  • 00:16:37.030 --> 00:16:38.050
  • over the infidelity.
  • 00:16:38.050 --> 00:16:39.080
  • And I was like,
  • 00:16:39.080 --> 00:16:40.230
  • I gotta forgive you for these things because I'm still mad
  • 00:16:40.230 --> 00:16:43.020
  • at you for that.
  • 00:16:43.020 --> 00:16:44.160
  • Now I done forgave 50.000 women but I'm mad that you get to
  • 00:16:44.160 --> 00:16:47.170
  • have fun with TJ and them and I gotta be in there cookin'
  • 00:16:47.170 --> 00:16:50.120
  • or sewing something or going over homework papers or you
  • 00:16:50.120 --> 00:16:53.150
  • know, preparing for the next day or, whatever it is that I
  • 00:16:53.150 --> 00:16:56.120
  • gotta prepare for with them before I leave.
  • 00:16:56.120 --> 00:16:58.060
  • You always get to have fun and I gotta do all the work.
  • 00:16:58.060 --> 00:17:00.150
  • And we know as women we're going to carry many more of the
  • 00:17:00.150 --> 00:17:03.060
  • household related responsibilities and if you're traveling
  • 00:17:03.060 --> 00:17:05.170
  • you've gotta condense the amount of time to do that.
  • 00:17:05.170 --> 00:17:07.280
  • But I realized I didn't forgive my husband for how I
  • 00:17:07.280 --> 00:17:10.150
  • felt about that.
  • 00:17:10.150 --> 00:17:11.210
  • So like he said with that ongoing forgiveness
  • 00:17:11.210 --> 00:17:13.210
  • you gotta forgive constantly.
  • 00:17:13.210 --> 00:17:16.090
  • I been mad at you because
  • 00:17:16.090 --> 00:17:18.100
  • whatever. - You didn't compliment
  • 00:17:18.100 --> 00:17:19.100
  • my hair when I got it done.
  • 00:17:19.100 --> 00:17:20.210
  • I came in and you didn't say nothing at all.
  • 00:17:20.210 --> 00:17:22.140
  • - We mad six months later because we really came in thought
  • 00:17:22.140 --> 00:17:24.240
  • we was looking pretty. - Wait a minute, y'all
  • 00:17:24.240 --> 00:17:25.270
  • got a flow, y'all gotta flow.
  • 00:17:25.270 --> 00:17:28.090
  • We know your flow. - I'm sorry.
  • 00:17:28.090 --> 00:17:29.070
  • - I'm trying to catch up.
  • 00:17:29.070 --> 00:17:30.130
  • (laughs)
  • 00:17:30.130 --> 00:17:31.130
  • - I'm sorry.
  • 00:17:31.130 --> 00:17:32.120
  • We sorry, we sorry.
  • 00:17:32.120 --> 00:17:34.210
  • I ad lib on her.
  • 00:17:34.210 --> 00:17:36.040
  • You know like I ad lib when she's singing?
  • 00:17:36.040 --> 00:17:37.160
  • I ad lib on her stories.
  • 00:17:37.160 --> 00:17:39.030
  • - And so you all have a flow. - I learned how to deal with
  • 00:17:39.030 --> 00:17:41.030
  • it, it took me 20 years. - Yeah.
  • 00:17:41.030 --> 00:17:42.260
  • - My husband still hasn't figured it out.
  • 00:17:42.260 --> 00:17:44.190
  • He wants everybody to shut up and only one person talk
  • 00:17:44.190 --> 00:17:46.260
  • at a time.
  • 00:17:46.260 --> 00:17:47.210
  • (laughs)
  • 00:17:47.210 --> 00:17:48.160
  • He can't.
  • 00:17:48.160 --> 00:17:50.010
  • - 'Cause I wanna catch stuff.
  • 00:17:50.010 --> 00:17:52.020
  • I wanna catch what you're saying because it is so vitally
  • 00:17:52.020 --> 00:17:55.220
  • important and I don't know
  • 00:17:55.220 --> 00:17:57.280
  • if everyone who's here is keeping up with this process.
  • 00:17:57.280 --> 00:18:02.230
  • - [Erica] Got it.
  • 00:18:02.230 --> 00:18:04.010
  • - You know what I'm saying?
  • 00:18:04.010 --> 00:18:05.150
  • You know what you have walked out.
  • 00:18:05.150 --> 00:18:08.200
  • And there is some, see
  • 00:18:08.200 --> 00:18:10.150
  • yeah.
  • 00:18:11.120 --> 00:18:12.190
  • - They might be in the middle of it
  • 00:18:12.190 --> 00:18:14.030
  • right now. - They may be in
  • 00:18:14.030 --> 00:18:14.280
  • the middle of
  • 00:18:14.280 --> 00:18:16.170
  • what you are just so unashamedly
  • 00:18:16.170 --> 00:18:19.070
  • presenting.
  • 00:18:20.280 --> 00:18:22.200
  • Well Teddy, how you feelin' 'bout
  • 00:18:22.200 --> 00:18:25.120
  • people talking about this around you?
  • 00:18:26.160 --> 00:18:30.030
  • - That's pretty interesting too because
  • 00:18:30.030 --> 00:18:31.130
  • a lot of my friends
  • 00:18:31.130 --> 00:18:33.000
  • well,
  • 00:18:36.260 --> 00:18:37.210
  • you know man it's interesting that I don't have the same
  • 00:18:39.030 --> 00:18:42.090
  • friends anymore unfortunately.
  • 00:18:42.090 --> 00:18:44.030
  • And - Come on, Teddy.
  • 00:18:44.030 --> 00:18:46.020
  • - [Pastor Freeman] You don't have the same friends.
  • 00:18:46.020 --> 00:18:47.280
  • - No, it's been... - After that episode?
  • 00:18:47.280 --> 00:18:50.120
  • - It's only been three, four years, you know?
  • 00:18:50.120 --> 00:18:54.060
  • We still cool.
  • 00:18:54.060 --> 00:18:55.110
  • Man, Warryn is my only friend left of my old crew.
  • 00:18:57.210 --> 00:19:00.210
  • But he my brother, he gotta be.
  • 00:19:00.210 --> 00:19:02.050
  • - Jesus is his best friend.
  • 00:19:02.050 --> 00:19:03.170
  • - I don't got a choice.
  • 00:19:03.170 --> 00:19:04.230
  • - He don't have a choice.
  • 00:19:04.230 --> 00:19:06.240
  • I said all that to say and a lot of my friends...
  • 00:19:08.060 --> 00:19:09.250
  • - [Pastor] Are you guys really friends?
  • 00:19:09.250 --> 00:19:11.230
  • - Yeah, that's my man.
  • 00:19:11.230 --> 00:19:12.230
  • - Is there great benefit in that?
  • 00:19:12.230 --> 00:19:14.070
  • - Well I knew him before I knew them.
  • 00:19:14.070 --> 00:19:15.230
  • - [Teddy] Yeah.
  • 00:19:15.230 --> 00:19:16.290
  • - We just happen to have the same last name.
  • 00:19:16.290 --> 00:19:18.110
  • - [Teddy] Yeah, we're not related.
  • 00:19:18.110 --> 00:19:19.130
  • We have the same last name.
  • 00:19:19.130 --> 00:19:20.210
  • We met each other, I was on tour, he was on tour.
  • 00:19:20.210 --> 00:19:23.040
  • We were on tour together.
  • 00:19:23.040 --> 00:19:24.150
  • - [Warryn] We were the same age.
  • 00:19:24.150 --> 00:19:25.130
  • - I met him in a hotel lobby.
  • 00:19:25.130 --> 00:19:26.260
  • - [Pastor Freeman] Y'all done picked up the same stuff
  • 00:19:26.260 --> 00:19:27.180
  • that they got.
  • 00:19:27.180 --> 00:19:28.250
  • - Babe, you just gotta cut it out.
  • 00:19:28.250 --> 00:19:30.270
  • (laughs)
  • 00:19:30.270 --> 00:19:31.230
  • - Yeah, we know.
  • 00:19:31.230 --> 00:19:33.130
  • It's a curse!
  • 00:19:33.130 --> 00:19:34.290
  • It's a curse of the Atkins!
  • 00:19:34.290 --> 00:19:36.280
  • - I'm trying to keep up.
  • 00:19:36.280 --> 00:19:38.150
  • - [Teddy] Alright, listen.
  • 00:19:38.150 --> 00:19:39.220
  • Alright here we go, - I need to sit back.
  • 00:19:39.220 --> 00:19:41.050
  • - Here we go, here we go. - You need to relax.
  • 00:19:41.050 --> 00:19:44.010
  • - To answer your question quickly.
  • 00:19:44.010 --> 00:19:46.290
  • Most of my friends were
  • 00:19:46.290 --> 00:19:49.080
  • nervous and concerned about me and how I was feeling
  • 00:19:49.080 --> 00:19:53.120
  • because my wife would really be open with her testimony.
  • 00:19:53.120 --> 00:19:57.130
  • - Yeah. - And so I was like,
  • 00:19:57.130 --> 00:19:59.260
  • I told her she could tell it.
  • 00:19:59.260 --> 00:20:01.110
  • You know what I mean, she asked me
  • 00:20:01.110 --> 00:20:03.150
  • was it cool if she talked about it, you know what I mean?
  • 00:20:03.150 --> 00:20:05.160
  • And when she asked me was it cool if she talked about it
  • 00:20:05.160 --> 00:20:08.040
  • she didn't know everything yet.
  • 00:20:08.040 --> 00:20:09.280
  • You know what I mean?
  • 00:20:09.280 --> 00:20:10.250
  • So,
  • 00:20:10.250 --> 00:20:11.200
  • I was like,
  • 00:20:11.200 --> 00:20:12.170
  • yeah it's cool, it's cool.
  • 00:20:13.190 --> 00:20:16.070
  • - [Pastor Freeman] Say that again.
  • 00:20:16.070 --> 00:20:17.220
  • - When she asked me could she go public with our situation
  • 00:20:17.220 --> 00:20:22.100
  • in our marriage, she didn't know the extent of it yet.
  • 00:20:22.100 --> 00:20:26.240
  • And I still told her yeah.
  • 00:20:26.240 --> 00:20:29.000
  • And
  • 00:20:29.000 --> 00:20:29.250
  • that was mostly the Holy Spirit.
  • 00:20:31.130 --> 00:20:33.220
  • Because
  • 00:20:33.220 --> 00:20:35.060
  • if I needed to completely be delivered and set free from the
  • 00:20:35.060 --> 00:20:37.200
  • lifestyle I was in, it needed to be open.
  • 00:20:37.200 --> 00:20:41.220
  • Because God desires a truth from your inward part.
  • 00:20:41.220 --> 00:20:44.210
  • No matter how he gets it, he needs the inward part of your
  • 00:20:44.210 --> 00:20:47.230
  • truth to heal you.
  • 00:20:47.230 --> 00:20:49.200
  • He needs the stuff...
  • 00:20:49.200 --> 00:20:50.200
  • You know how
  • 00:20:50.200 --> 00:20:52.040
  • if there's an accident, a plane go down, a plane crash?
  • 00:20:52.040 --> 00:20:55.120
  • And you wanna know what happened in that plane crash you
  • 00:20:55.120 --> 00:20:57.020
  • go to that black box they talk about?
  • 00:20:57.020 --> 00:20:59.150
  • So you know exactly what happened to the mechanisms and all
  • 00:20:59.150 --> 00:21:02.220
  • of the mechanics and whatever you call that.
  • 00:21:02.220 --> 00:21:04.270
  • God wants that little black box.
  • 00:21:04.270 --> 00:21:06.240
  • And that's the stuff that we hold ourself.
  • 00:21:06.240 --> 00:21:08.180
  • Like he don't know it already.
  • 00:21:08.180 --> 00:21:10.090
  • - [Pastor Freeman] I feel a preach comin' on.
  • 00:21:10.090 --> 00:21:12.000
  • (laughs)
  • 00:21:12.000 --> 00:21:13.130
  • - So I had to give God the little black box and the little
  • 00:21:13.130 --> 00:21:15.230
  • black box was me telling her so she could get it to y'all.
  • 00:21:15.230 --> 00:21:20.120
  • So I could really be free of it, you know?
  • 00:21:20.120 --> 00:21:23.200
  • So my friends were like, "Man I'm just..."
  • 00:21:23.200 --> 00:21:25.190
  • - [Pastor] Oh, okay, okay.
  • 00:21:25.190 --> 00:21:26.140
  • Pause.
  • 00:21:26.140 --> 00:21:27.090
  • (laughs)
  • 00:21:27.090 --> 00:21:28.100
  • Because
  • 00:21:28.100 --> 00:21:29.290
  • you don't have to tell it to be totally set free.
  • 00:21:29.290 --> 00:21:33.220
  • You can be set free without telling it.
  • 00:21:33.220 --> 00:21:36.290
  • - I disagree, Pastor. - I do disagree too.
  • 00:21:39.060 --> 00:21:40.280
  • - [Pastor Freeman] Okay, let's go at it.
  • 00:21:40.280 --> 00:21:42.020
  • - I'mma tell you...
  • 00:21:42.020 --> 00:21:44.010
  • Go 'head, Daddy. - Can I explain it because
  • 00:21:44.010 --> 00:21:44.280
  • it was me?
  • 00:21:44.280 --> 00:21:45.230
  • (laughs)
  • 00:21:45.230 --> 00:21:48.090
  • I'mma tell you right now.
  • 00:21:48.090 --> 00:21:50.040
  • If you do not come out of agreement with the lifestyle,
  • 00:21:50.040 --> 00:21:53.160
  • I don't care if it's everybody knowing it,
  • 00:21:53.160 --> 00:21:56.210
  • if you don't get to a place where you are not.
  • 00:21:56.210 --> 00:22:00.070
  • 'Cause if you hold it, you can still be shamed.
  • 00:22:00.070 --> 00:22:02.160
  • - It's gone hold you. - Shame will have you.
  • 00:22:02.160 --> 00:22:04.240
  • You will not be free.
  • 00:22:04.240 --> 00:22:06.030
  • Because
  • 00:22:06.030 --> 00:22:07.140
  • it's impossible to be free if
  • 00:22:07.140 --> 00:22:10.160
  • it's just you and your wife.
  • 00:22:10.160 --> 00:22:12.140
  • I mean, you don't have to do the way I did it and go in
  • 00:22:12.140 --> 00:22:14.130
  • front of the world and tell the world.
  • 00:22:14.130 --> 00:22:16.140
  • - Absolutely. - But you've got to...
  • 00:22:16.140 --> 00:22:18.190
  • If you wanna be free of it you have to come out of agreement
  • 00:22:18.190 --> 00:22:22.150
  • with the person that you're in covenant with.
  • 00:22:22.150 --> 00:22:25.140
  • That's number one.
  • 00:22:25.140 --> 00:22:26.180
  • You know, I mean.
  • 00:22:26.180 --> 00:22:28.130
  • And so, if that's a husband and wife, if you have a
  • 00:22:28.130 --> 00:22:31.020
  • spiritual father, your leader and your pastor, whatever.
  • 00:22:31.020 --> 00:22:35.070
  • I sat down and told my pastor what I was doing and he looked
  • 00:22:36.210 --> 00:22:39.000
  • at me and he said, and this was one thing that broke me.
  • 00:22:39.000 --> 00:22:41.270
  • That's why I don't agree with it just being you
  • 00:22:41.270 --> 00:22:45.080
  • and the Lord.
  • 00:22:45.080 --> 00:22:46.240
  • You gotta tell somebody.
  • 00:22:46.240 --> 00:22:48.250
  • The bible tells us to go to your brothers and
  • 00:22:48.250 --> 00:22:50.200
  • - Confess our sins. - And confess your sins
  • 00:22:50.200 --> 00:22:52.160
  • to one another. - As far as one to
  • 00:22:52.160 --> 00:22:53.150
  • another so that we may be...
  • 00:22:53.150 --> 00:22:55.010
  • - Yeah, so I told my pastor what I was doing and he looked
  • 00:22:55.010 --> 00:22:57.150
  • at me, looked at me out the side of his eye and had his legs
  • 00:22:57.150 --> 00:23:00.100
  • crossed and looked.
  • 00:23:00.100 --> 00:23:01.080
  • He said, "Mhm, mhm."
  • 00:23:01.080 --> 00:23:02.160
  • I said, oh yeah Pastor it was bad.
  • 00:23:02.160 --> 00:23:03.230
  • He said, "Mhm, yeah, yeah, yeah."
  • 00:23:03.230 --> 00:23:05.020
  • He said, "You know what I call people like you?
  • 00:23:05.020 --> 00:23:07.200
  • "He said you're a believer but you're not a follower."
  • 00:23:07.200 --> 00:23:11.010
  • And when he said that to me it changed my life.
  • 00:23:11.010 --> 00:23:13.100
  • If I had never said that to him, that
  • 00:23:13.100 --> 00:23:15.160
  • revelation would've clicked.
  • 00:23:15.160 --> 00:23:16.140
  • It wouldn't have clicked for me.
  • 00:23:16.140 --> 00:23:18.000
  • It just wouldn't have happened.
  • 00:23:18.000 --> 00:23:19.200
  • I don't think that you have to do...
  • 00:23:19.200 --> 00:23:22.240
  • Like first of all, y'all don't have the platform that me and
  • 00:23:22.240 --> 00:23:24.190
  • my wife have.
  • 00:23:24.190 --> 00:23:25.210
  • You ain't on TV, - Right, right.
  • 00:23:25.210 --> 00:23:27.060
  • - You don't got to tell everybody.
  • 00:23:27.060 --> 00:23:28.010
  • - Absolutely.
  • 00:23:28.010 --> 00:23:29.030
  • Right. - Don't pick up no
  • 00:23:29.030 --> 00:23:30.100
  • bullhorn and be like, "Listen, I was a cheat!"
  • 00:23:30.100 --> 00:23:31.240
  • - Right. - That's stupid,
  • 00:23:31.240 --> 00:23:33.030
  • don't do that. (audience laughs)
  • 00:23:33.030 --> 00:23:35.100
  • - That's the point I would like to highlight.
  • 00:23:35.100 --> 00:23:37.280
  • - Yeah don't do that. - You can use this
  • 00:23:37.280 --> 00:23:39.130
  • platform - Yeah.
  • 00:23:39.130 --> 00:23:40.200
  • - In a grade of magnitude. - Right.
  • 00:23:40.200 --> 00:23:43.100
  • - Guess what, Pastor, that wasn't even my vision.
  • 00:23:43.100 --> 00:23:46.290
  • I didn't even know to think that great.
  • 00:23:46.290 --> 00:23:48.190
  • I watched shame and pride tear my mother and father apart.
  • 00:23:48.190 --> 00:23:53.090
  • My mother and father was married to each other three times
  • 00:23:53.090 --> 00:23:55.210
  • and divorced to each other three times.
  • 00:23:55.210 --> 00:23:57.180
  • - Wait, wait, wait, wait, - Yeah, yeah.
  • 00:23:57.180 --> 00:23:59.110
  • - [Erica] Take a minute, let him soak it in.
  • 00:23:59.110 --> 00:24:01.170
  • They married each other (audience laughs)
  • 00:24:01.170 --> 00:24:04.020
  • then divorced
  • 00:24:04.020 --> 00:24:05.100
  • and then got they got married again.
  • 00:24:05.100 --> 00:24:07.080
  • - Then divorced. - Then got divorced.
  • 00:24:07.080 --> 00:24:08.290
  • - And then my mama had - And did it again.
  • 00:24:08.290 --> 00:24:10.130
  • - Some sisters who said Honey, you need to marry somebody
  • 00:24:10.130 --> 00:24:12.120
  • that's gone take care of you these kids so this man comes
  • 00:24:12.120 --> 00:24:14.230
  • and my mama was not in love with him and she said, "Mm-mm.
  • 00:24:14.230 --> 00:24:17.190
  • "I love Eddy Atkins."
  • 00:24:17.190 --> 00:24:18.260
  • So they got married again.
  • 00:24:18.260 --> 00:24:20.120
  • Now at the last wedding all the kids sat them down and said,
  • 00:24:20.120 --> 00:24:23.140
  • "Y'all gone have to make up y'all mind 'cause we confused."
  • 00:24:23.140 --> 00:24:25.180
  • - We tired of this foolishness.
  • 00:24:25.180 --> 00:24:26.240
  • (audience laughs)
  • 00:24:26.240 --> 00:24:28.080
  • - And they even got a divorce the last time but my mom's
  • 00:24:28.080 --> 00:24:30.140
  • heart was for my dad, and my dad's heart for my mom.
  • 00:24:30.140 --> 00:24:34.040
  • It's something that I probably need to go to therapy about
  • 00:24:34.040 --> 00:24:37.230
  • - It's still messin' with you, E?
  • 00:24:37.230 --> 00:24:39.000
  • - Yeah it's still messing with me.
  • 00:24:39.000 --> 00:24:39.160
  • Voiceover: Thank you for viewing Living By Faith.
  • 00:24:40.130 --> 00:24:42.260
  • If you'd like to obtain a copy of today's lesson,
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  • or any other featured item,
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  • please give us a call at 1-888-630-4540.
  • 00:24:47.030 --> 00:24:54.080
  • Voiceover: If you are ever in the Washington
  • 00:24:54.290 --> 00:24:56.100
  • - I sure hope that Bishop T.D. Jakes doesn't mind me
  • 00:24:59.170 --> 00:25:03.100
  • using a page out of his book, and tell you
  • 00:25:03.100 --> 00:25:06.290
  • to get ready, get ready, get ready,
  • 00:25:06.290 --> 00:25:09.290
  • because God's Glamorous Girls, GGG, is coming in July,
  • 00:25:09.290 --> 00:25:14.040
  • July 11th, at the Baltimore Convention Center.
  • 00:25:16.060 --> 00:25:20.120
  • My wife is preparing for you ladies all over the world.
  • 00:25:20.120 --> 00:25:24.170
  • Ya gotta be there.
  • 00:25:26.000 --> 00:25:27.140
  • One of the most exciting woman's conferences
  • 00:25:27.140 --> 00:25:31.090
  • in this entire world.
  • 00:25:31.090 --> 00:25:33.230
  • You won't want to miss it.
  • 00:25:33.230 --> 00:25:34.270
  • It's gonna bless your life.
  • 00:25:34.270 --> 00:25:35.070
  • In addition, men, hear me, hear me good,
  • 00:25:35.250 --> 00:25:39.050
  • I'm meeting with all of the men
  • 00:25:39.050 --> 00:25:41.090
  • while the ladies are doing their thing.
  • 00:25:41.090 --> 00:25:44.270
  • I want to share with you, all of the pastors,
  • 00:25:44.270 --> 00:25:48.010
  • come along with your wife.
  • 00:25:48.010 --> 00:25:49.090
  • You didn't think there was anything for you,
  • 00:25:49.090 --> 00:25:52.020
  • but there're some things that I am feverishly
  • 00:25:52.020 --> 00:25:55.280
  • planning at this particular time
  • 00:25:55.280 --> 00:25:58.140
  • to make sure I can speak to you.
  • 00:25:58.140 --> 00:26:00.280
  • It's a very laid back setting.
  • 00:26:00.280 --> 00:26:02.210
  • You won't have to dress up or be
  • 00:26:02.210 --> 00:26:05.060
  • prepared as we would for conferences.
  • 00:26:05.060 --> 00:26:08.020
  • I just want to sit there with you,
  • 00:26:08.020 --> 00:26:10.150
  • share some things that I've learned over the years,
  • 00:26:10.150 --> 00:26:13.180
  • to cause your ministry to have
  • 00:26:13.180 --> 00:26:15.140
  • the excitement that we have here at
  • 00:26:15.140 --> 00:26:17.250
  • Spirit of Faith Christian Center.
  • 00:26:17.250 --> 00:26:19.190
  • But GGG, you won't want to miss it, I promise you.
  • 00:26:19.190 --> 00:26:23.010
  • Don't be like one of those who were saying after the fact,
  • 00:26:23.010 --> 00:26:26.230
  • "Man, I knew I should have been there."
  • 00:26:26.230 --> 00:26:29.070
  • Be there.
  • 00:26:29.070 --> 00:26:30.020
  • (dramatic tone)
  • 00:26:37.060 --> 00:26:39.260
  • (dramatic music)
  • 00:26:49.180 --> 00:26:52.110
  • (cheering)
  • 00:26:58.240 --> 00:27:01.030
  • (dramatic music)
  • 00:27:03.240 --> 00:27:06.160
  • - [Narrator] Coming to the Baltimore Convention Center,
  • 00:27:14.040 --> 00:27:16.050
  • July 11th through the 13th,
  • 00:27:16.050 --> 00:27:18.010
  • The Fellowship presents Pink Rain,
  • 00:27:18.010 --> 00:27:20.270
  • a God's Glamorous Girls production.
  • 00:27:20.270 --> 00:27:23.120
  • Featuring DeeDee Freeman,
  • 00:27:23.120 --> 00:27:25.080
  • Shun Strickland, R.A. Vernon,
  • 00:27:25.080 --> 00:27:27.160
  • Brelyn Bowman, RealTalk Kim, Sheryl Brady,
  • 00:27:27.160 --> 00:27:30.290
  • with performances by MaryMary.
  • 00:27:30.290 --> 00:27:33.220
  • I get it
  • 00:27:33.220 --> 00:27:34.290
  • Go get it, go get it, go get it
  • 00:27:34.290 --> 00:27:36.260
  • - [Narrator] Tim Bowman Jr.
  • 00:27:36.260 --> 00:27:38.130
  • I'm good
  • 00:27:38.130 --> 00:27:39.180
  • Good enough to love myself
  • 00:27:39.180 --> 00:27:41.010
  • So good
  • 00:27:41.010 --> 00:27:42.030
  • - [Narrator] Michelle Williams.
  • 00:27:42.030 --> 00:27:43.010
  • Jesus said yes
  • 00:27:43.010 --> 00:27:45.030
  • Nobody can say no
  • 00:27:45.030 --> 00:27:46.270
  • - [Narrator] And Leandria Johnson.
  • 00:27:46.270 --> 00:27:48.250
  • Curses ain't broken
  • 00:27:48.250 --> 00:27:52.000
  • Still trying to hold me down
  • 00:27:55.000 --> 00:27:58.280
  • - [Narrator] If you have a passion for script writing
  • 00:28:00.140 --> 00:28:02.050
  • or acting, we're bringing Hollywood to you,
  • 00:28:02.050 --> 00:28:05.050
  • with classes taught by actress Meagan Good,
  • 00:28:05.050 --> 00:28:07.240
  • music legend MC Lyte, actress Lisa Raye,
  • 00:28:07.240 --> 00:28:10.280
  • and many more and there will be a special
  • 00:28:10.280 --> 00:28:13.100
  • two day meeting with Dr. Michael Freeman
  • 00:28:13.100 --> 00:28:15.160
  • for all senior pastors.
  • 00:28:15.160 --> 00:28:17.080
  • So register today for three powerful days
  • 00:28:17.080 --> 00:28:20.140
  • of inspiration and transformation
  • 00:28:20.140 --> 00:28:22.290
  • at GodsGlamorousGirls.com.
  • 00:28:22.290 --> 00:28:25.230
  • GodsGlamorousGirls.com.
  • 00:28:25.230 --> 00:28:27.170
  • It's going to be epic.
  • 00:28:27.170 --> 00:28:29.120