Ed Young - How To Discipline

May 16, 2025 | S25:E118

The Winning Walk with Dr. Ed Young is the international on-air and online teaching ministry of Dr. Ed Young. The Winning Walk proclaims the proven truth of God’s Word to give men and women the world over a winning way to live life.

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The Winning Walk with Dr. Ed Young | Ed Young - How To Discipline | May 16, 2025

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Cc by aberdeen captioning 1-800-688-6621 www.aberdeen.io
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Dr. ed young: we need to learn how to parent
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In the world in which we live.
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You know what parenting today is like?
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It's like building a fire in the rain.
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You ever tried to build a fire in the rain?
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I have. it's tough, isn't it?
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Man, a lot of things you gotta have-some shelter.
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You try to cover it up.
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You got to have the right kind of wood,
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And you might get a fire going.
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It rains harder. it puts it out.
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You have to take the coals and work them.
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Building a fire in the rain is difficult.
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Some would say it's impossible.
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Oh no!
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It just takes diligence.
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You have to know what you're doing.
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You have to stay with it, and that's what it takes to takes
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These little miracles we call sons and daughters, and grow
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Them up the way god would have them, us to grow 'em up as
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Mothers and dads and those who support and teach and lead them.
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It's like building a fire in the rain in our culture, isn't it?
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So how do you do it?
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It's a challenge for all of us,
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And we can't anticipate all the signs of rebellion.
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We can't anticipate all the situations we find ourselves
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With kids and with families.
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You know, how in the world can we prepare them?
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How can we build the right stuff in them that god would have us
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To build in them as parents?
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You know, handling this situation,
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And we can't plan for all the extremities.
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But there are some basic things, parents, couples can do to sort
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Of put some things down; to put down a grid, some parameters.
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And i'll represent to you two negatives and two positives.
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Two negatives-don't do this.
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Two positives-do this, and it'll help us in the overwhelming
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Challenge in our modern world, and that is to, with our sons
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And with our daughters, to build a fire in their life;
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A purpose in their life;
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Christ in their life in the middle of a rainstorm.
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I want you to look first of all, the first negative.
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Ephesians chapter number 6.
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Paul is writing.
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He says, "fathers, do not provoke your children to anger."
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Do not provoke your children to anger.
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How does that operate?
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Do not provoke your children to wrath.
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It means our children are never to be angry with us?
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No.
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Means our children are always to be happy?
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No.
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But we don't provoke them in such a way that they are
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Overwhelmed with bitterness, and it stays in their lives, and it,
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It stored up there, and there's a seething kind of anger
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That comes with our sons and daughters,
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And this happens when we over-discipline them.
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It happens when we under-discipline them.
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I remember when my son, ed-he was a sophomore
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Or junior in high school.
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He had a big test on the constitution and the bylaws.
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I asked him through the week-"are you studying?
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Are you sort of getting it?"
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"oh yeah, dad.... i'm on top of it!
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I'll be ready for the test..."
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The night before the test, i went up to his room and i got
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The book and the study questions, and i asked him, and
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He didn't know the constitution from mary had a little lamb!
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(audience laughs).
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It was unbelievable!
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I reminded him we'd visited washington.
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We'd seen it behind the case.
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Man, he did know anything, and all week long,
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He was ready for the big test.
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And i just lost it.
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And i remember, i grabbed him by the hair, way too hard.
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I said, "son, we're gonna stay here til' you know the
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Constitution, the bylaws, the amendment and everybody who
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Wrote them, backwards and forwards, and...
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We went to bed about quarter til' 4:00.
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Next morning, i went up there because i didn't sleep very much
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That short night, and i apologized.
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I cried, and he cried.
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I over-disciplined him.
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We've even dealt with that again as we are adults.
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You see, you can provoke your children.
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I, i-you know, he was too old for this kind of corporation
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Punishment, and see, i was not in control;
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But i was asking him to be in control.
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Parents, when you're not in control,
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You can't discipline your children.
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If you do it, you do it improperly, and you
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Discipline them to a point of anger and a point of wrath.
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That's what the warning here paul gives us.
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Don't over-discipline your kids.
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It's got to be the right time, the right place,
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Identified with the right person, in the right situation.
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All of our kids are different.
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With ed, it took corporate punishment to get him
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In line so many, many times.
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With ben, you could talk and reason with him.
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With cliff, he had such a tender heart,
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You just look at him-he got it.
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You see, you have to adapt to all of these things,
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Age appropriate.
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And so we can over-discipline, and we can under-discipline.
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The best illustration of under-discipline
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I know of is in the bible.
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You have king david. man, he's on the throne.
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He's ruling everything. he's in charge.
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He's king! doing a fabulous job.
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Geo-political relations are up.
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The economy is up.
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Man, the people respect him.
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He's honored.
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He's a poet.
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He's a man after god's own heart.
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But what happened in his family?
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His son, amnon was sick.
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Amnon asked his half-sister, tamar, to come and feed him
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While he was in the bed sick.
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When everyone left, he took his sister and he raped her.
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It said in the bible david knew about it.
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He was angry, but he did nothing about it.
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He knew, but he did nothing.
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The deadliest thing in a family is a passive father,
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Ladies and gentlemen.
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The deadliest thing is a passive father.
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And what happened in that situation?
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Two years later, absalom came and killed his own brother to
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Avenge what he had done to his sister.
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And then absalom was put in exile.
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Then david brought absalom back home, and absalom fell before
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Him, but david wouldn't even see him for two years.
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And absalom later led a rebellion against david and his
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Own father, because david knew and did nothing.
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That's under-disciplining, and that leads to wrath.
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You see the wrath, the bitterness that was in
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Absalom because of passive dad?
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So we can over-discipline and under-discipline and we can miss
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This clear word of instruction from god's word.
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Don't provoke your children to anger, to wrath.
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And then look at the next negative we see.
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These are the words of jesus.
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Turn with me to luke chapter number 17.
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The same story is told in matthew.
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Luke chapter 17: jesus speaking: he said to the disciples,
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"it is inevitable that stumbling blocks come,
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But woe to him through whom they come.
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It would be better for him if a millstone was hung around his
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Neck and he was thrown into the sea, than one would cause one of
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These little ones to stumble."
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In other words, don't trip up your kids.
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Don't provoke them. don't trip them up.
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Don't cause them to stumble.
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You say, "well, how do we do that?"
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I read only this week about the situation that disney has.
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It seems that a group of new york sophisticates were taking
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Their kids to disney down in orlando,
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And they found a way to beat the long lines.
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They would hire somebody who was handicapped to lead their
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Children in; they'd go to the head of the line,
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And one new york society woman boasted, said, "everybody else
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Stood two and a half to get-two and a half hours to get in
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"it's a small world" but my kids, led
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By that handicapped person, they were in in a minute and a half!
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They just blitzed disney!
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And they were bragging about it.
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Another man was talking about he did the same thing.
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He got a doctor to write out a prescription and said his son
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Was hddd-hddd i think all of us are that anyway...
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And therefore, they put him at the head of the line.
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See, they broke the system.
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You say, "well, what about that?"
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You see what you're doing?
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You're tripping up your son and daughter.
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You are showing them how to take short-cuts by money,
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By prestige, by beating the system, and therefore, they get
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To college, and they're "oh, i can't believe you cheated
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On that test and you're thrown out of school!"
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Dad, mom, you don't have a leg to stand on, any more than david
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Had a leg to stand on in dealing with his son,
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Who's raped his daughter because david had already been
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Guilty of sleeping with someone who wasn't his wife.
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See what i'm saying?
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We cause our children to stumble, and sometimes they
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Stumble so ingloriously, it breaks your heart.
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Here's a letter written a few years back by a teenager:
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Dear folks: thank you for everything, but i'm going to
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Chicago and try to start some kind of new life.
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You ask me why i did those things and why
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I gave you so much trouble.
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The answer is easy for me to give to you,
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But i'm wondering if you will understand?
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Remember when i was 6 or 7 and i used to
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Want you to just listen to me?
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I remember all the nice things you gave me for christmas,
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My birthday.
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I was really happy with those things, about a few days, at the
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Time i got the things; but the rest of the time during the
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Year, i really didn't want presents.
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I just wanted all the time for you to listen to me, like i was
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Somebody who felt things too, because i remember even when
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I was young, i felt things...
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But you said you were too busy...
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Mom, you're a wonderful cook.
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You have everything so clean, that you tried so much from
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Doing all those things that make you busy;
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But you know something, mom?
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I would have liked crackers and peanut butter
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Just as well if you'd only sat down with me
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Awhile during the day and said to me,
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'tell me all about it so maybe i can help you understand...'
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I think all the kids who are doing so many
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Things that grownups are tearing their hair out worrying about
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Are really looking for somebody who'll have time to listen a few
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Minutes, and who really will treat them as they would a
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Grown-up who might be useful to them, and you know?
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Polite to them...
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If you folks ever said to me, 'pardon me..."
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When you interrupted me, i would have dropped dead.
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If anybody asks you where i am, tell them i've gone looking
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For somebody with time because i've got
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A lot of things i want to talk about.
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Love to all, (he signed it) your son.
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See, our kids-we trip them up.
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I remember going to a school play some years back, and a
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Little guy in the play had a part, you know,
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About a minute and a half.
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He did his thing, and after the play was over,
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That little guy came storming behind the stage.
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I happen to see him, and he just ran out
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There to his daddy, you know...
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To him, he'd just played hamlet on broadway!
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You know, he was just thrilled to death!
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And he ran out there, and he grabbed his daddy-wanted him
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To say, you know, what a good job he'd done,
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And i'm proud of you, son...
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His dad said, "i can't talk to you now.
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I'm talking to mr. smithson."
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So he pushed him to one side,
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And you could see that little guy.
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He just goes off.
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He's broken hearted.
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Parents, awake up!
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Be sensitive to your kids!
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Don't cause them to trip.
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Don't cause them to trip, to stumble.
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It's better that, jesus said, a millstone be hung around
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The neck of somebody who trips up a kid.
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In our society when we tolerate pedophilia,
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I don't understand it!
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Look what jesus says, about how deadly it is.
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Our kids-we build them up!
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Jesus said, "let them come to me."
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"oh no!" the disciples said. "oh no!
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You're talking to a lot of big important people!"
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He said, "i don't care about them.
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Suffer the little children to come to me."
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He said, "unless you have the humility of a child
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Like that you'll never get to heaven yourself."
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How important!
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Jesus elevated children-elevated children.
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The bible gives us instruction:
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Don't provoke your kids to wrath.
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Don't trip up your kids by your lifestyle.
00:12:47.656 --> 00:12:51.961
But what's the positive part of training?
00:12:51.961 --> 00:12:54.396
Look at it.
00:12:54.396 --> 00:12:55.731
We go immediately to the book of proverbs, a very familiar verse.
00:12:55.731 --> 00:12:58.567
Proverbs, chapter 22, verse 6: "train up a child in the way
00:12:58.567 --> 00:13:05.808
That he should go, and when he is old,
00:13:05.808 --> 00:13:07.743
He will not depart from it."
00:13:07.743 --> 00:13:09.078
What does that mean?
00:13:09.078 --> 00:13:10.546
It means train up a child in the way you think he should go?
00:13:10.546 --> 00:13:14.416
She should go? no, no.
00:13:14.416 --> 00:13:16.352
It means train up a child in the way god has bent them.
00:13:16.352 --> 00:13:23.525
Back in biblical days when a child did not begin to suck when
00:13:23.525 --> 00:13:28.664
They were born, the midwife would take some fig juice and
00:13:28.664 --> 00:13:31.300
Rub it on their gums, and they would teach them out to suck,
00:13:31.300 --> 00:13:35.871
And they naturally became sucking machines so they could
00:13:35.871 --> 00:13:38.841
Live-so they could live.
00:13:38.841 --> 00:13:43.646
That's the way we train children.
00:13:43.646 --> 00:13:45.581
We look at our children. we study them.
00:13:45.581 --> 00:13:47.883
We ask god for discernment.
00:13:47.883 --> 00:13:49.685
We see how god has bent them, how god has placed them,
00:13:49.685 --> 00:13:54.089
And then, not how we want-we see where there giftedness is.
00:13:54.089 --> 00:13:57.760
We see where their passion is...
00:13:57.760 --> 00:14:00.262
You know, jo beth and i were just strolling through life.
00:14:00.262 --> 00:14:02.498
All of a sudden, my youngest son, cliff was born and we were
00:14:02.498 --> 00:14:05.234
Trying to figure out how he was bent, and we couldn't figure it
00:14:05.234 --> 00:14:08.604
Out until we gave him a guitar-a little guitar one christmas, and
00:14:08.604 --> 00:14:12.775
Man, all of a sudden, we have a musician on our hands!
00:14:12.775 --> 00:14:15.110
Where did that come from?
00:14:15.110 --> 00:14:17.780
You see, you, you have to do this with your kids.
00:14:17.780 --> 00:14:20.149
Don't have all those presuppositions,
00:14:20.149 --> 00:14:22.885
All those ideas of what they ought to be.
00:14:22.885 --> 00:14:24.787
See, when our kids are young and a kid will say, you know,
00:14:24.787 --> 00:14:28.624
"i want to be a doctor!"
00:14:28.624 --> 00:14:30.592
And all the rest of his years, "you know, billy, when you were
00:14:30.592 --> 00:14:32.761
Little, you said you wanted to be a doctor.
00:14:32.761 --> 00:14:34.697
You know, you know, you said you wanted to be a doctor, billy..."
00:14:34.697 --> 00:14:37.166
Now if billy said, "i want to be a garbage man..."
00:14:37.166 --> 00:14:40.235
We'd never bring that up again, would we?
00:14:40.235 --> 00:14:42.171
(audience laughs).
00:14:42.171 --> 00:14:44.173
Let me tell you something, ladies and gentlemen:
00:14:44.173 --> 00:14:46.108
Billy as a doctor is in worse shape than billy
00:14:46.108 --> 00:14:51.146
As a garbage man, if he's outside the will of god.
00:14:51.146 --> 00:14:55.551
It's not prestige, money, power...
00:14:55.551 --> 00:14:58.220
We can't live variously through our children.
00:14:58.220 --> 00:15:00.823
We figure out how god has molded them.
00:15:00.823 --> 00:15:04.526
I know a man who has been tremendously successful in the
00:15:04.526 --> 00:15:07.196
Business world, but he's been miserable all
00:15:07.196 --> 00:15:09.798
The years of professional life.
00:15:09.798 --> 00:15:11.667
He has the gift of being a teacher, and he said,
00:15:11.667 --> 00:15:14.336
"oh, how i wanted to teach!
00:15:14.336 --> 00:15:16.038
But my family just wouldn't let me do it."
00:15:16.038 --> 00:15:20.009
You see, you miss the passion of your life.
00:15:20.009 --> 00:15:22.678
You want to find out what turns your kids on,
00:15:22.678 --> 00:15:24.680
And you study them, and you encourage them.
00:15:24.680 --> 00:15:27.383
See how god has bent them.
00:15:27.383 --> 00:15:29.318
Then you train them.
00:15:29.318 --> 00:15:30.853
Well, how do you train them?
00:15:30.853 --> 00:15:32.554
You know how the jews tra, trained in the bible.
00:15:32.554 --> 00:15:34.957
You go to deuteronomy chapter 6, you see it clearly.
00:15:34.957 --> 00:15:37.292
It's the shema.
00:15:37.292 --> 00:15:38.660
And they come, the, the, and moses just give
00:15:38.660 --> 00:15:40.796
Them the ten commandments, and he says,
00:15:40.796 --> 00:15:42.731
"this is how you are to teach your kids right and wrong."
00:15:42.731 --> 00:15:45.901
Look at deuteronomy chapter 6 verse 7 following.
00:15:45.901 --> 00:15:48.804
This is how you do it.
00:15:48.804 --> 00:15:50.139
"you shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of
00:15:50.139 --> 00:15:53.709
Them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way,
00:15:53.709 --> 00:15:56.945
And when you lie down, and when you rise up.
00:15:56.945 --> 00:15:59.915
You shall bind them as a sign on your hand,
00:15:59.915 --> 00:16:02.684
And they shall be as frontals on your forehead.
00:16:02.684 --> 00:16:05.387
You will write them on the doorposts
00:16:05.387 --> 00:16:07.056
Of your house, on your gates."
00:16:07.056 --> 00:16:08.390
What is this saying?
00:16:08.390 --> 00:16:09.725
It's saying that in the home,
00:16:09.725 --> 00:16:11.293
We surround our kids with principles of life.
00:16:11.293 --> 00:16:15.431
We teach them.
00:16:15.431 --> 00:16:17.699
God is number one.
00:16:17.699 --> 00:16:19.868
Don't take his name in vain.
00:16:19.868 --> 00:16:22.438
Worship him on the sabbath, on sunday.
00:16:22.438 --> 00:16:25.541
Be a worshipper.
00:16:25.541 --> 00:16:26.875
Honor your father and your mother.
00:16:26.875 --> 00:16:28.877
Don't murder. don't commit adultery.
00:16:28.877 --> 00:16:30.979
Don't steal. don't lie.
00:16:30.979 --> 00:16:32.614
Don't covet. and we teach that.
00:16:32.614 --> 00:16:34.917
We inculcate.
00:16:34.917 --> 00:16:36.452
We, we teach that to our kids all the time.
00:16:36.452 --> 00:16:39.221
It's just a part of the atmosphere of
00:16:39.221 --> 00:16:41.290
Our family and of our home.
00:16:41.290 --> 00:16:43.225
This is how we do it.
00:16:43.225 --> 00:16:46.695
We are training them up in the way that god has bent
00:16:46.695 --> 00:16:51.567
Them, putting moral fiber in the middle of them.
00:16:51.567 --> 00:16:55.137
That's the second, that's the third thing we do, and that's
00:16:55.137 --> 00:16:57.406
The first positive thing we do.
00:16:57.406 --> 00:16:59.608
Look at the next positive thing we do with our kids.
00:16:59.608 --> 00:17:01.743
We go back to ephesians.
00:17:01.743 --> 00:17:03.345
It finishes that passage up.
00:17:03.345 --> 00:17:06.181
It says, "but bring them up in the discipline and
00:17:06.181 --> 00:17:08.951
Instruction of the lord."
00:17:08.951 --> 00:17:10.586
You teach them in the way god has bent them, giving moral
00:17:10.586 --> 00:17:15.224
Fiber to them, and then you bring them up-you bring them,
00:17:15.224 --> 00:17:18.961
You go along with them.
00:17:18.961 --> 00:17:22.097
Ladies and gentlemen, you can require your kids to do what you
00:17:22.097 --> 00:17:26.368
Want them to do until they become teenagers.
00:17:26.368 --> 00:17:28.837
Then they'll begin to do what you do, and there's our problem.
00:17:28.837 --> 00:17:34.910
There's our problem.
00:17:34.910 --> 00:17:37.112
We bring them up in the discipline of the lord.
00:17:37.112 --> 00:17:42.084
What is discipline?
00:17:42.084 --> 00:17:43.418
You say, "oh, that's punishment."
00:17:43.418 --> 00:17:44.753
Oh no, it isn't.
00:17:44.753 --> 00:17:46.088
Discipline is drawing boundaries.
00:17:46.088 --> 00:17:48.023
Here is the boundary.
00:17:48.023 --> 00:17:49.358
This is how our family functions.
00:17:49.358 --> 00:17:51.126
Here are the rules. here is the regulation.
00:17:51.126 --> 00:17:53.061
This is who we are. these are the boundaries.
00:17:53.061 --> 00:17:55.063
That's discipline.
00:17:55.063 --> 00:17:56.698
Then when they move outside of those boundaries, then you have
00:17:56.698 --> 00:17:59.801
A response that is appropriate to age and that
00:17:59.801 --> 00:18:02.671
Particular situation, and that particular child.
00:18:02.671 --> 00:18:06.909
And see, that's where parents are always praying for wisdom
00:18:06.909 --> 00:18:09.478
And discern, and discernment and the leadership of the spirit.
00:18:09.478 --> 00:18:13.582
So in the instruction, in the discipline, and the
00:18:13.582 --> 00:18:16.285
Instruction of the lord; in the teaching of the lord.
00:18:16.285 --> 00:18:20.289
How do you teach?
00:18:20.289 --> 00:18:22.591
I remember my mother teaching me how to walk across the street
00:18:22.591 --> 00:18:24.793
When i was a little guy.
00:18:24.793 --> 00:18:26.128
You know, in front of our, our house, there was a street...
00:18:26.128 --> 00:18:28.931
I thought it was a busy street;
00:18:28.931 --> 00:18:30.632
A car went by about every 30 minutes.
00:18:30.632 --> 00:18:32.334
But anyway...
00:18:32.334 --> 00:18:33.669
And she said, and she would take-i'd go to go across the
00:18:33.669 --> 00:18:35.837
Street to play with people.
00:18:35.837 --> 00:18:37.172
She'd take me by the hand.
00:18:37.172 --> 00:18:38.607
She'd say, "edwin, stop, look, and listen..."
00:18:38.607 --> 00:18:40.342
We'd walk across.
00:18:40.342 --> 00:18:41.677
We'd come back, stop, look, and listen.
00:18:41.677 --> 00:18:43.245
We did this a few times.
00:18:43.245 --> 00:18:44.580
Then she said, "all right-i want you to lead,
00:18:44.580 --> 00:18:46.481
Lead me by the hand."
00:18:46.481 --> 00:18:47.816
So i took her hand and i stopped and looked, and i led her.
00:18:47.816 --> 00:18:50.485
Sometimes she'd say, "wait a minute!
00:18:50.485 --> 00:18:52.254
That car is coming..."
00:18:52.254 --> 00:18:53.589
And we did that.
00:18:53.589 --> 00:18:54.923
Then a few times, she'd say, "i'll stand on the curb.
00:18:54.923 --> 00:18:56.692
Let's see how you do." and she'd watch me.
00:18:56.692 --> 00:18:58.760
"that's good. that's terrific.
00:18:58.760 --> 00:19:00.495
You've got it!"
00:19:00.495 --> 00:19:01.830
Then down the road, she'd stand at the door of the house.
00:19:01.830 --> 00:19:03.599
She'd say, "okay, i'm watching you."
00:19:03.599 --> 00:19:05.534
And i'd stop, look, and listen...
00:19:05.534 --> 00:19:07.236
That's the way she taught.
00:19:07.236 --> 00:19:08.570
That is the way we teach our children
00:19:08.570 --> 00:19:10.105
And all kinds of things.
00:19:10.105 --> 00:19:11.440
We're with them. we stay with them.
00:19:11.440 --> 00:19:13.041
We hang in there with them.
00:19:13.041 --> 00:19:14.376
We're teaching the way the lord has taught,
00:19:14.376 --> 00:19:17.613
In the admonition of his truth.
00:19:17.613 --> 00:19:20.782
Now here is the challenge: you build all the right stuff with
00:19:20.782 --> 00:19:26.188
Time, and talent, and prayer, and going to church with them,
00:19:26.188 --> 00:19:29.191
Praying with them, an all of a sudden,
00:19:29.191 --> 00:19:31.126
They leave home and they go bazooka!
00:19:31.126 --> 00:19:34.863
Wild!
00:19:34.863 --> 00:19:37.165
What in the world?
00:19:37.165 --> 00:19:38.800
And we fall back on this verse-"train up a child in the
00:19:38.800 --> 00:19:41.169
Way he should go, and when he is old, he'll not depart from it."
00:19:41.169 --> 00:19:43.205
"boy, i sure hope they come back!
00:19:43.205 --> 00:19:46.608
I sure hope they do!
00:19:46.608 --> 00:19:47.943
You know, we tried to train 'em up!"
00:19:47.943 --> 00:19:49.678
I've heard that a quinzillion times!
00:19:49.678 --> 00:19:53.548
Let me show you what's missing in our training up our children
00:19:53.548 --> 00:19:55.917
Right here at this point.
00:19:55.917 --> 00:19:57.252
Let me show you what we miss many times.
00:19:57.252 --> 00:20:00.122
We get all the rights, and the wrongs, and the do's,
00:20:00.122 --> 00:20:02.557
And the don't's, and the discipline, and the parameters,
00:20:02.557 --> 00:20:05.427
And we encourage, and we build all those things in;
00:20:05.427 --> 00:20:08.297
But we leave out something.
00:20:08.297 --> 00:20:11.767
I want you to see what joseph had in the bible,
00:20:11.767 --> 00:20:14.369
What his other brothers didn't have.
00:20:14.369 --> 00:20:17.639
Joseph-the other sons of big
00:20:17.639 --> 00:20:19.675
Jake were just unscrupulous characters.
00:20:19.675 --> 00:20:23.145
They were slime.
00:20:23.145 --> 00:20:24.479
They were the kind of kids you didn't want
00:20:24.479 --> 00:20:26.415
Your kids to play with.
00:20:26.415 --> 00:20:28.417
But big jake, i'm sure, took the shema and commandments
00:20:28.417 --> 00:20:33.922
And tried to build that in his kids.
00:20:33.922 --> 00:20:35.390
That's what they did... that's what they did.
00:20:35.390 --> 00:20:37.225
Moses' principles.
00:20:37.225 --> 00:20:38.994
But it took with joseph, and you look at joseph...
00:20:38.994 --> 00:20:42.631
They, they were jealous of him.
00:20:42.631 --> 00:20:43.965
He was a little egotistical-mark that down;
00:20:43.965 --> 00:20:46.501
The favorite of his father.
00:20:46.501 --> 00:20:48.737
His mother was rachel-different from leah, the other boys...
00:20:48.737 --> 00:20:52.307
And the brothers sold him.
00:20:52.307 --> 00:20:53.675
They wanted to kill him, but they sold him as
00:20:53.675 --> 00:20:55.277
A slave and went to potiphar's house.
00:20:55.277 --> 00:20:57.179
Potiphar put him in charge of everything.
00:20:57.179 --> 00:20:59.281
Potiphar's wife tried to seduce him.
00:20:59.281 --> 00:21:01.116
He said "no." she accused him.
00:21:01.116 --> 00:21:02.818
He was put in prison. he became head of the prison.
00:21:02.818 --> 00:21:06.088
Then he made some promises, and he predicted some things,
00:21:06.088 --> 00:21:08.557
Some dreams they had, and they said they would speak for him
00:21:08.557 --> 00:21:11.360
Before pharaoh, but they didn't, until finally the day pharaoh
00:21:11.360 --> 00:21:14.930
Recognized joseph as someone who could be prime minister because
00:21:14.930 --> 00:21:18.934
Of his understanding of god and economic affairs,
00:21:18.934 --> 00:21:21.837
And here is joseph, a stranger, a jew, now a prime minister of
00:21:21.837 --> 00:21:26.007
The most powerful nation in the world.
00:21:26.007 --> 00:21:27.943
You say, "he's not qualified!"
00:21:27.943 --> 00:21:31.413
Man, was he qualified!
00:21:31.413 --> 00:21:33.548
As a young man, he thought he was going to die.
00:21:33.548 --> 00:21:35.984
As a young man, he was sold into slavery.
00:21:35.984 --> 00:21:38.019
As a young man, he rose in prominence in potiphar's house.
00:21:38.019 --> 00:21:41.423
As a young man, he rose in prominence as he was in prison.
00:21:41.423 --> 00:21:44.493
See, god put him through all those schools of discipline that
00:21:44.493 --> 00:21:47.696
Uniquely prepared him for that moment of
00:21:47.696 --> 00:21:50.198
Service and exaltation in his life.
00:21:50.198 --> 00:21:54.403
What did, how did joseph have this kind of character
00:21:54.403 --> 00:21:57.372
And fiber and his other brothers didn't?
00:21:57.372 --> 00:22:01.376
You see the character demonstrated there when
00:22:01.376 --> 00:22:04.279
Mrs. potiphar tried to seduce him.
00:22:04.279 --> 00:22:06.214
She was "miss egypt"-knockout, beautiful.
00:22:06.214 --> 00:22:09.918
And it was the culture of the day.
00:22:09.918 --> 00:22:11.853
Here is joseph, strong, handsome, jewish.
00:22:11.853 --> 00:22:15.824
Man, he was something!
00:22:15.824 --> 00:22:17.492
And the bible says she tempted him day, after day, after day.
00:22:17.492 --> 00:22:21.863
Not a one-time deal...
00:22:21.863 --> 00:22:24.399
And finally, he said, "no."
00:22:24.399 --> 00:22:26.268
And she grabbed him by the shirt and ripped the shirt off his
00:22:26.268 --> 00:22:29.171
Back as he ran from her; but he told her as
00:22:29.171 --> 00:22:32.407
To why he could not sleep with her.
00:22:32.407 --> 00:22:35.644
Three things. what did he say?
00:22:35.644 --> 00:22:37.946
He said, "i can't do this thing because your husband has put
00:22:37.946 --> 00:22:42.217
Me in charge of everything he has but you."
00:22:42.217 --> 00:22:46.388
You know, he had a vocational accountability he was taught.
00:22:46.388 --> 00:22:50.358
And then he says, "i can't do this
00:22:50.358 --> 00:22:52.294
Thing because you're his wife.
00:22:52.294 --> 00:22:56.164
You're the exclusive property of him and
00:22:56.164 --> 00:22:58.133
He's the exclusive property of you.
00:22:58.133 --> 00:22:59.868
I can't do it."
00:22:59.868 --> 00:23:01.203
And then he said, "the third reason
00:23:01.203 --> 00:23:02.971
I can't do it is because god sees me."
00:23:02.971 --> 00:23:05.874
Where did he learn this kind of application?
00:23:05.874 --> 00:23:08.477
His older brothers evidently didn't have it.
00:23:08.477 --> 00:23:11.413
Had the same dad, but a different mom,
00:23:11.413 --> 00:23:13.482
And i'm gonna guess it was rachel, that that mom said,
00:23:13.482 --> 00:23:17.686
"look-here's what you don't do, and here's what you do...
00:23:17.686 --> 00:23:21.857
But this is..." (here it is, parents)
00:23:21.857 --> 00:23:24.292
"why we do not worship other gods.
00:23:24.292 --> 00:23:29.297
This is why we do not covet other people's property.
00:23:29.297 --> 00:23:35.337
This is why we do not murder.
00:23:35.337 --> 00:23:38.039
It's why we do not commit adultery.
00:23:38.039 --> 00:23:40.141
It's why we do not steal.
00:23:40.141 --> 00:23:42.110
It's why..."
00:23:42.110 --> 00:23:43.845
You see, we have to not only teach and put boundaries up
00:23:43.845 --> 00:23:46.948
And explain; we use illustrations in life and say,
00:23:46.948 --> 00:23:50.685
"look what happened over there.
00:23:50.685 --> 00:23:52.420
Look what they did wrong. look at the example.
00:23:52.420 --> 00:23:54.556
Look what's going right in that life.
00:23:54.556 --> 00:23:56.424
Why? look why?
00:23:56.424 --> 00:23:58.393
How, what happened to that kid on drugs?
00:23:58.393 --> 00:24:01.096
And look what happened to that life.
00:24:01.096 --> 00:24:02.631
Look what happened to that kid who made the right choice and
00:24:02.631 --> 00:24:05.700
What happened in that life."
00:24:05.700 --> 00:24:07.035
You see, we not only teach and lay down all the principles,
00:24:07.035 --> 00:24:10.505
Line upon line, precept upon precept;
00:24:10.505 --> 00:24:12.941
We explain to our kids why.
00:24:12.941 --> 00:24:16.545
And when you do that, they'll get out in this
00:24:16.545 --> 00:24:19.481
World and they'll make valued judgments and
00:24:19.481 --> 00:24:22.784
Moral choices that will be fabulous!
00:24:22.784 --> 00:24:28.156
See the genius of it?
00:24:28.156 --> 00:24:30.959
Two negatives: don't provoke.
00:24:30.959 --> 00:24:35.163
Don't trip up.
00:24:35.163 --> 00:24:37.399
What do you do?
00:24:37.399 --> 00:24:39.467
You train up-words and precepts.
00:24:39.467 --> 00:24:43.204
Then you bring them up.
00:24:43.204 --> 00:24:44.673
That means you bring them along with yourself, and i wonder how
00:24:44.673 --> 00:24:49.844
Many sons and daughters are saying, "you know, my mom and
00:24:49.844 --> 00:24:52.314
Dad went to church all the time when we were coming up,
00:24:52.314 --> 00:24:54.482
And now they have just moved on..."
00:24:54.482 --> 00:24:58.653
What does that say to your kids now?
00:24:58.653 --> 00:25:02.757
'cause parenting is a life-time calling and responsibility.
00:25:02.757 --> 00:25:09.197
Ed: at some point, every marriage will run into
00:25:09.264 --> 00:25:11.967
Tough times.
00:25:11.967 --> 00:25:13.468
Whether it's miscommunication, money, sex, or in-laws, every
00:25:13.468 --> 00:25:17.072
Marriage goes through a rocky patch.
00:25:17.072 --> 00:25:19.874
Far too often, those rocky patches end up ruining otherwise
00:25:19.874 --> 00:25:23.545
Great, potentially super marriages.
00:25:23.545 --> 00:25:26.781
But it does not have to be that way.
00:25:26.781 --> 00:25:30.085
God designed marriage, and he gave us the keys to have a
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Marriage that works, a marriage that sizzles.
00:25:34.022 --> 00:25:37.025
In my book, "the ten commandments of marriage", i lay
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Out ten practical principles to make your marriage super.
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I hope that you will get this resource today.
00:25:44.833 --> 00:25:50.105
Female announcer: to get your copy, call the number on your
00:25:50.105 --> 00:25:52.040
Screen or go online at winningwalk.org.
00:25:52.040 --> 00:25:55.276
It's our gift to you for your financial support
00:25:55.276 --> 00:25:57.746
Of this ministry.
00:25:57.746 --> 00:25:59.481
Marriage may not always be bliss, but with god's help, it
00:25:59.481 --> 00:26:03.018
Can be amazing.
00:26:03.018 --> 00:26:05.286
Ed: i remember a bible study group that consisted of doctors
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And attorneys and ceos and
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Vice presidents and presidents of corporations,
00:26:12.260 --> 00:26:15.597
Entrepreneurial genius' and a street sweeper.
00:26:15.597 --> 00:26:19.868
In the initial meeting, the group leader asked
00:26:19.868 --> 00:26:22.170
Each to identify himself.
00:26:22.170 --> 00:26:24.606
First one said, ‘i'm a physician',
00:26:24.606 --> 00:26:26.741
Another, ‘i'm an attorney',
00:26:26.741 --> 00:26:29.577
‘i'm vice president of operations' answered a third.
00:26:29.577 --> 00:26:33.014
And finally it was the street sweeper's turn.
00:26:33.014 --> 00:26:36.418
I was a little apprehensive about what he'd say.
00:26:36.418 --> 00:26:39.020
He said, ‘i am a son of the king'.
00:26:39.020 --> 00:26:44.059
He had no identity in the world for which he could boast,
00:26:44.059 --> 00:26:48.196
But he knew his core identity.
00:26:48.196 --> 00:26:51.332
The others were clouded by their earthly title, position,
00:26:51.332 --> 00:26:54.936
But the street sweeper knew he was chosen by the king of kings
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To be a son with all the privileges and honors, man,
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Of that high position.
00:27:04.446 --> 00:27:06.247
Remember, as sons and daughters of god
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Who you are in jesus christ right now, today.
00:27:09.384 --> 00:27:13.922
There's not a higher position in anybody's kingdom.
00:27:13.922 --> 00:27:19.761
♪♪♪
00:27:19.761 --> 00:27:19.761

Ed Young - How To Discipline

May 16, 2025 | S25:E118

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