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Better Together

Find Freedom in Confession - Episode 1109

October 23, 2025 | S7 E1109 | 52:34

Find Freedom in Confession - Episode 1109
"Have mercy on me, oh God!" In Psalm 51, David cries out to God for forgiveness for adultery and murder. Confession is the first step to experiencing God's grace and restoration. No matter what we have done, His love invites us to freedom. | TBN Prayer Line: 714-731-1000
#Repentance #Healing #Forgiveness #Grace #Restoration #Freedom #Faith #SpiritualGrowth #Discipline #Relationships #Sin #Mercy #Accountability #Joy #Shame

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Show Timecode
Better Together | Find Freedom in Confession - Episode 1109 | October 23, 2025
  • - the first step to lasting freedom from sin is confessing
  • 00:00:01.347 --> 00:00:05.618
  • That we are wrong.
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  • God's forgiveness is an immediate invitation to turn
  • 00:00:06.786 --> 00:00:10.156
  • Around and find restoration.
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  • Come on, join us.
  • 00:00:11.858 --> 00:00:12.592
  • (music playing)
  • 00:00:12.592 --> 00:00:42.021
  • - we're focusing on psalm 51 and so much of david's path
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  • That followed him from the backfield to the battlefield,
  • 00:00:47.260 --> 00:00:50.630
  • To the throne room, to the balcony,
  • 00:00:50.630 --> 00:00:53.666
  • Where he wasn't supposed to be,
  • 00:00:53.666 --> 00:00:55.268
  • When he was supposed to be on the battlefield.
  • 00:00:55.268 --> 00:00:56.636
  • And we see him in these conversations,
  • 00:00:56.636 --> 00:00:59.472
  • These intimate conversations that we wouldn't have if he
  • 00:00:59.472 --> 00:01:02.775
  • Didn't allow us to read them.
  • 00:01:02.775 --> 00:01:04.344
  • So, we have to remember that no matter what mistakes he
  • 00:01:04.344 --> 00:01:07.147
  • Made, he was definitely able and willing to allow those
  • 00:01:07.147 --> 00:01:10.850
  • Mistakes to be teaching moments for generations to
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  • Come.
  • 00:01:14.420 --> 00:01:15.688
  • But his conversation isn't to other people, it's to god.
  • 00:01:15.688 --> 00:01:18.424
  • And so, whatever his title was,
  • 00:01:18.424 --> 00:01:22.595
  • Whether it was defender of the sheep in the backfield,
  • 00:01:22.595 --> 00:01:25.932
  • Warrior, worshiper, husband, king,
  • 00:01:25.932 --> 00:01:30.036
  • We get to see a sneak peek into what was really going on
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  • Behind that title, behind that season.
  • 00:01:35.975 --> 00:01:40.113
  • And i love that whatever hardness life demanded of
  • 00:01:40.113 --> 00:01:46.352
  • David, whether it was to face goliath or to overcome the
  • 00:01:46.352 --> 00:01:50.557
  • Rejection of being the eighth son,
  • 00:01:50.557 --> 00:01:51.925
  • And to believe what was spoken over his life,
  • 00:01:51.925 --> 00:01:55.662
  • To step forward and step out onto the battlefield to lead
  • 00:01:55.662 --> 00:02:01.067
  • God's people, to even forgive the mentor slash tormentor,
  • 00:02:01.067 --> 00:02:03.736
  • That was saul.
  • 00:02:03.736 --> 00:02:08.942
  • And i love that the hardness of who he was in facing each
  • 00:02:08.942 --> 00:02:14.113
  • Of those was his step forward.
  • 00:02:14.113 --> 00:02:17.116
  • He was soft before god.
  • 00:02:17.116 --> 00:02:20.620
  • So, i think he is one of the perfect examples of how to
  • 00:02:20.620 --> 00:02:26.259
  • Keep a clean heart when life gets dirty.
  • 00:02:26.259 --> 00:02:28.661
  • And all of us can learn from that.
  • 00:02:28.661 --> 00:02:31.264
  • And i love in psalm 51 how he begins with verse one and he
  • 00:02:31.264 --> 00:02:36.569
  • Says, "have mercy on me, o god,
  • 00:02:36.569 --> 00:02:38.638
  • For i recognize my rebellion.
  • 00:02:38.638 --> 00:02:40.506
  • It haunts me day and night." and then you get down to verse
  • 00:02:40.506 --> 00:02:47.413
  • 10 and he says, "create in me a clean heart, o god.
  • 00:02:47.413 --> 00:02:50.483
  • Renew a loyal spirit within me."
  • 00:02:50.483 --> 00:02:55.054
  • We keep going, and he says, in verse 16 and 17,
  • 00:02:55.054 --> 00:02:59.125
  • "you do not desire a sacrifice, or i would offer one."
  • 00:02:59.125 --> 00:03:03.296
  • And i love how he says that because
  • 00:03:03.296 --> 00:03:05.665
  • He's a guy who has offered a lot of sacrifice.
  • 00:03:05.665 --> 00:03:08.501
  • But he recognizes, in this moment of repentance,
  • 00:03:08.501 --> 00:03:13.006
  • There is no substitution.
  • 00:03:13.006 --> 00:03:15.441
  • I can't put something else on the altar.
  • 00:03:15.441 --> 00:03:19.312
  • It's me this time.
  • 00:03:19.312 --> 00:03:22.115
  • So, he says, "the sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit.
  • 00:03:22.115 --> 00:03:25.785
  • You will not reject a broken and repentant heart,
  • 00:03:25.785 --> 00:03:31.791
  • O god."
  • 00:03:31.791 --> 00:03:33.259
  • And i love this so much because we know in the
  • 00:03:33.259 --> 00:03:36.362
  • Psalm that he says that god resists the proud,
  • 00:03:36.362 --> 00:03:39.332
  • But gives grace to the humble.
  • 00:03:39.332 --> 00:03:41.567
  • So, he understands here that the sacrifice is humility.
  • 00:03:41.567 --> 00:03:45.171
  • No matter what his title is, no matter what his entitlement
  • 00:03:45.271 --> 00:03:47.707
  • Or relationships or connections,
  • 00:03:47.707 --> 00:03:49.676
  • He's crying out to god.
  • 00:03:49.676 --> 00:03:51.411
  • And this chapter 51 is right after nathan, the prophet,
  • 00:03:51.411 --> 00:03:55.214
  • Confronts him for the sin that he's committed,
  • 00:03:55.214 --> 00:03:59.319
  • Not just with bathsheba, but in also manipulating the
  • 00:03:59.319 --> 00:04:04.424
  • Outcome by putting her husband on the front line.
  • 00:04:04.424 --> 00:04:08.227
  • So, he is confronted by nathan.
  • 00:04:08.227 --> 00:04:11.597
  • And i love how god uses this because god uses an allegory.
  • 00:04:11.597 --> 00:04:16.969
  • Nathan tells him a story about a shepherd who has many sheep
  • 00:04:16.969 --> 00:04:21.507
  • But steals the one sheet from another shepherd who only has
  • 00:04:21.507 --> 00:04:24.911
  • One.
  • 00:04:24.911 --> 00:04:26.012
  • And he is relaying to, you've got lots of wives,
  • 00:04:26.012 --> 00:04:28.381
  • But you took the one and only wife of uriah.
  • 00:04:28.381 --> 00:04:32.118
  • And i love how he points out here to him,
  • 00:04:32.118 --> 00:04:35.455
  • And he's able to see right from wrong when it has to do
  • 00:04:35.455 --> 00:04:40.026
  • With someone else.
  • 00:04:40.026 --> 00:04:41.060
  • And god often will do that.
  • 00:04:41.060 --> 00:04:42.895
  • It's almost like a magnet.
  • 00:04:42.895 --> 00:04:44.797
  • When the judgment in us comes out,
  • 00:04:44.797 --> 00:04:47.800
  • It's a good opportunity for us to turn that back on ourselves
  • 00:04:47.800 --> 00:04:51.504
  • And go, why am i so hard on that?
  • 00:04:51.504 --> 00:04:53.906
  • Is there something in me, god, that this shows me about
  • 00:04:53.906 --> 00:04:58.277
  • Myself?
  • 00:04:58.277 --> 00:04:59.479
  • Because that's a great teaching moment on repentance.
  • 00:04:59.479 --> 00:05:03.249
  • - god did not allow david to keep a sin a secret because
  • 00:05:03.249 --> 00:05:05.785
  • God loved david.
  • 00:05:05.785 --> 00:05:07.420
  • He was looking out for david's highest good.
  • 00:05:07.420 --> 00:05:10.890
  • I think if god let him off the hook and did not really
  • 00:05:10.890 --> 00:05:15.728
  • Confront him through nathan, then there's a high chance
  • 00:05:15.728 --> 00:05:18.731
  • That david would've spent the rest of his life wallowing in
  • 00:05:18.731 --> 00:05:22.735
  • The misery of his unconfessed sin.
  • 00:05:22.735 --> 00:05:25.671
  • He would've consistently been manipulating, controlling,
  • 00:05:25.671 --> 00:05:28.808
  • Hiding, and he would've never been set free.
  • 00:05:28.808 --> 00:05:32.211
  • And so, god's confrontation to david was not to torment him
  • 00:05:32.211 --> 00:05:36.949
  • Or to shame him, but to set him free.
  • 00:05:36.949 --> 00:05:39.419
  • - i have this retreat every month and it's called the well
  • 00:05:39.419 --> 00:05:44.257
  • Because it's the place where women encounter god,
  • 00:05:44.257 --> 00:05:46.225
  • Like the woman at the well, and are forever changed.
  • 00:05:46.225 --> 00:05:49.495
  • And i feel, in that construction of that retreat,
  • 00:05:49.495 --> 00:05:53.766
  • That god, as he was leading me through,
  • 00:05:53.766 --> 00:05:56.335
  • This is what i want to do with women,
  • 00:05:56.335 --> 00:05:58.271
  • Because so much of the desire in the world today is to be
  • 00:05:58.271 --> 00:06:02.542
  • Well known, to be significant.
  • 00:06:02.542 --> 00:06:04.110
  • In fact, we just got off of a trip from roman.
  • 00:06:04.110 --> 00:06:08.481
  • I couldn't believe we went to see the colosseum.
  • 00:06:08.481 --> 00:06:10.450
  • There was about 25 women posing in front of the
  • 00:06:10.450 --> 00:06:14.086
  • Colosseum.
  • 00:06:14.086 --> 00:06:15.421
  • I guess they were influencers, but they had their husband's,
  • 00:06:15.421 --> 00:06:17.256
  • Boyfriends, everybody taking pictures.
  • 00:06:17.256 --> 00:06:18.791
  • And they were trying to look so relaxed and whatever.
  • 00:06:18.791 --> 00:06:21.427
  • And i'm like, all these people,
  • 00:06:21.427 --> 00:06:23.563
  • I don't know if they have an audience of a hundred or a
  • 00:06:23.563 --> 00:06:25.765
  • Hundred thousand, but everyone wants to be well known.
  • 00:06:25.765 --> 00:06:29.001
  • And really, the craving of our heart that cannot be met by
  • 00:06:29.001 --> 00:06:34.307
  • Being known by thousands or even millions is the craving
  • 00:06:34.307 --> 00:06:37.610
  • To be known by god intimately.
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  • To be known and to be accepted.
  • 00:06:39.479 --> 00:06:43.049
  • And that's what i love about this retreat,
  • 00:06:43.049 --> 00:06:44.884
  • Because we take women through this idea that the woman at
  • 00:06:44.884 --> 00:06:48.521
  • The well, everybody knew everything about her.
  • 00:06:48.521 --> 00:06:50.723
  • It's why she avoided them and went during the heat of the
  • 00:06:50.723 --> 00:06:53.726
  • Day.
  • 00:06:53.726 --> 00:06:54.627
  • So, she went to deal with the gossip.
  • 00:06:54.627 --> 00:06:55.828
  • But when she is restored to truth and confronted with
  • 00:06:55.828 --> 00:07:00.433
  • Truth by jesus, she leaves her jug and she runs back to the
  • 00:07:00.433 --> 00:07:04.904
  • Village he's from.
  • 00:07:04.904 --> 00:07:06.172
  • And she says, come meet the man who knew everything about
  • 00:07:06.172 --> 00:07:08.407
  • Me.
  • 00:07:08.407 --> 00:07:09.675
  • And what i find significant about that is,
  • 00:07:09.675 --> 00:07:11.944
  • Everybody knew everything about her.
  • 00:07:11.944 --> 00:07:13.746
  • But the intrinsic value of his knowledge about her is that he
  • 00:07:13.746 --> 00:07:18.918
  • Knew her and loved her and accepted her.
  • 00:07:18.918 --> 00:07:22.154
  • So, to be well known requires acknowledgement of sin,
  • 00:07:22.154 --> 00:07:25.825
  • Because jesus couldn't just talk to her about theology,
  • 00:07:25.825 --> 00:07:29.829
  • About where we worship, whether it's synagogue or the
  • 00:07:29.829 --> 00:07:33.799
  • Mountain.
  • 00:07:33.799 --> 00:07:34.734
  • She was knowledgeable, but he's like,
  • 00:07:34.734 --> 00:07:36.903
  • I want to talk about that husband that you've got,
  • 00:07:36.903 --> 00:07:39.739
  • That sixth man right now.
  • 00:07:39.739 --> 00:07:41.474
  • And she goes, but i don't have a husband.
  • 00:07:41.474 --> 00:07:42.808
  • He is like, you're right.
  • 00:07:42.808 --> 00:07:43.543
  • That is true.
  • 00:07:43.543 --> 00:07:44.644
  • You said one true thing.
  • 00:07:44.644 --> 00:07:45.711
  • He's not your husband, but you've had five.
  • 00:07:45.711 --> 00:07:49.749
  • And i love in that moment that he confronts her with the
  • 00:07:49.749 --> 00:07:53.452
  • Truth.
  • 00:07:53.452 --> 00:07:54.453
  • But her response to that is repentance.
  • 00:07:54.453 --> 00:07:57.823
  • And repentance, the definition is return to the top.
  • 00:07:57.823 --> 00:08:02.228
  • And i think a lot of us have this idea that it's groveling,
  • 00:08:02.228 --> 00:08:05.398
  • That it's walking on your hands and knees.
  • 00:08:05.398 --> 00:08:08.568
  • When we were at the colosseum, the first time i went,
  • 00:08:08.568 --> 00:08:10.836
  • 20 years ago, we saw this woman in this beautiful chanel
  • 00:08:10.836 --> 00:08:13.606
  • Suit, beautiful stockings, back when people used to wear
  • 00:08:13.606 --> 00:08:17.143
  • Those, and all black.
  • 00:08:17.143 --> 00:08:17.910
  • She was gorgeous.
  • 00:08:17.910 --> 00:08:19.812
  • And she was crawling on her hands and knees all the way
  • 00:08:19.812 --> 00:08:24.550
  • Across in front of st. peter's basilica.
  • 00:08:24.550 --> 00:08:26.552
  • That's a huge plaza.
  • 00:08:26.552 --> 00:08:29.188
  • And she was doing it out of shame and penance.
  • 00:08:29.188 --> 00:08:31.524
  • There's a difference between penance and repentance.
  • 00:08:31.524 --> 00:08:35.461
  • To repent means to return to the top.
  • 00:08:35.461 --> 00:08:40.533
  • We get the word penthouse from the same route we get the word
  • 00:08:40.533 --> 00:08:44.470
  • Repentance, which is always, a penthouse is the top floor of
  • 00:08:44.470 --> 00:08:47.607
  • Any building.
  • 00:08:47.607 --> 00:08:48.608
  • So, when god is calling us to repentance,
  • 00:08:48.608 --> 00:08:50.776
  • He's calling us to return to the best design for our life.
  • 00:08:50.776 --> 00:08:54.447
  • The very top ideal for what we were created for.
  • 00:08:54.447 --> 00:09:00.586
  • - god's forgiveness is one of the most incredible gifts that
  • 00:09:00.586 --> 00:09:03.389
  • You will ever receive.
  • 00:09:03.389 --> 00:09:04.991
  • And god is not in the recycling business.
  • 00:09:04.991 --> 00:09:08.828
  • It's so interesting.
  • 00:09:08.828 --> 00:09:09.962
  • God's in the redemption business where even the
  • 00:09:09.962 --> 00:09:12.465
  • Mistakes that we've made, even the times when we got it all
  • 00:09:12.465 --> 00:09:16.936
  • Wrong, that when you bring those to god,
  • 00:09:16.936 --> 00:09:18.904
  • He can make something beautiful.
  • 00:09:18.904 --> 00:09:20.506
  • I really believe.
  • 00:09:20.506 --> 00:09:21.607
  • In fact, i have it written on a stone in my yard,
  • 00:09:21.607 --> 00:09:25.277
  • A beautiful thing that god will do with a broken life if
  • 00:09:25.277 --> 00:09:28.681
  • You give him all the pieces.
  • 00:09:28.681 --> 00:09:30.650
  • You might find yourself in a situation right now where you
  • 00:09:30.650 --> 00:09:34.320
  • Think, there's nothing that can redeem this.
  • 00:09:34.320 --> 00:09:36.422
  • That's until you understand that god is a redeemer,
  • 00:09:36.422 --> 00:09:39.458
  • Whatever it is, you can bring it to him,
  • 00:09:39.458 --> 00:09:41.827
  • And he can make something beautiful.
  • 00:09:41.827 --> 00:09:43.295
  • - and i think that getting this idea of repentance as a
  • 00:09:43.295 --> 00:09:48.034
  • Part of the way of life, this is why in this retreat
  • 00:09:48.034 --> 00:09:51.570
  • Setting, i always admonish people because we do something
  • 00:09:51.570 --> 00:09:55.341
  • Called the mercy seat.
  • 00:09:55.341 --> 00:09:56.575
  • It's where we have each of the 12 women, one at a time.
  • 00:09:56.575 --> 00:09:59.578
  • You sit in the seat, and you confess your sin one to
  • 00:09:59.578 --> 00:10:03.883
  • Another.
  • 00:10:03.883 --> 00:10:05.151
  • And for a lot of people, it's the only time they've ever
  • 00:10:05.151 --> 00:10:06.952
  • Done that.
  • 00:10:06.952 --> 00:10:08.054
  • And the only place in scripture that promises
  • 00:10:08.054 --> 00:10:10.556
  • Healing is the verse that says,
  • 00:10:10.556 --> 00:10:12.558
  • "confess your sins one to another and you will be
  • 00:10:12.558 --> 00:10:15.761
  • Healed."
  • 00:10:15.761 --> 00:10:16.595
  • There's no other qualification.
  • 00:10:16.595 --> 00:10:18.464
  • So, confession is healing.
  • 00:10:18.464 --> 00:10:22.234
  • And it's important that we have people in our lives that
  • 00:10:22.234 --> 00:10:25.871
  • We can say we are known to, really known that there are no
  • 00:10:25.871 --> 00:10:28.641
  • Secrets that the enemy is using to torment us or to hold
  • 00:10:28.641 --> 00:10:32.578
  • Us back.
  • 00:10:32.578 --> 00:10:33.713
  • And so, we leave there, that group of 12 women.
  • 00:10:33.713 --> 00:10:36.515
  • We leave knowing there are people on the planet,
  • 00:10:36.515 --> 00:10:39.385
  • Those other women who know everything the enemy tried to
  • 00:10:39.385 --> 00:10:42.021
  • Use against me.
  • 00:10:42.021 --> 00:10:43.089
  • Because we sit in the mercy seat, we confess,
  • 00:10:43.089 --> 00:10:45.091
  • And then there's healing, there's repentance,
  • 00:10:45.091 --> 00:10:47.393
  • And there's prayer.
  • 00:10:47.393 --> 00:10:48.594
  • I always admonish women because when i went through
  • 00:10:48.594 --> 00:10:51.297
  • The well, when i created it, i had to go through it myself
  • 00:10:51.297 --> 00:10:54.033
  • First.
  • 00:10:54.033 --> 00:10:55.334
  • And so, i grabbed a group of 11 women, and i said, listen,
  • 00:10:55.334 --> 00:10:58.738
  • This is what i need to put myself through.
  • 00:10:58.738 --> 00:11:00.673
  • If you want to join me, great.
  • 00:11:00.673 --> 00:11:02.074
  • And i sat on the mercy seat.
  • 00:11:02.074 --> 00:11:04.844
  • And now, as leaders, when we lead people through it,
  • 00:11:04.844 --> 00:11:07.546
  • The leaders always model the mercy seat first.
  • 00:11:07.546 --> 00:11:10.015
  • We get on it first.
  • 00:11:10.015 --> 00:11:12.017
  • And it's not an act.
  • 00:11:12.017 --> 00:11:13.319
  • Because at first, we were like, well,
  • 00:11:13.319 --> 00:11:15.421
  • What if we don't have anything to repent?
  • 00:11:15.421 --> 00:11:16.956
  • We always have something to confess and repent for.
  • 00:11:16.956 --> 00:11:19.859
  • And it's always really interesting what the lord
  • 00:11:19.859 --> 00:11:22.595
  • Brings to our mind that needs to be conviction that happens
  • 00:11:22.595 --> 00:11:26.332
  • That we didn't even think about before.
  • 00:11:26.332 --> 00:11:28.400
  • And for me, when i went through this retreat the first
  • 00:11:28.400 --> 00:11:31.003
  • Time, and i sat on the mercy seat, it was the first for me.
  • 00:11:31.003 --> 00:11:33.572
  • I'd seen it modeled, but i'd never been able to do it.
  • 00:11:33.572 --> 00:11:36.175
  • And what the lord brought to my attention to confess and
  • 00:11:36.175 --> 00:11:39.378
  • Repent for was the sin of oversharing.
  • 00:11:39.378 --> 00:11:42.548
  • I'm an open book.
  • 00:11:42.548 --> 00:11:43.883
  • You've had my mother on this show.
  • 00:11:43.883 --> 00:11:47.353
  • You know.
  • 00:11:47.353 --> 00:11:48.320
  • It's like what you see is what you get.
  • 00:11:48.320 --> 00:11:51.924
  • We don't have secrets and a lot of back rooms.
  • 00:11:51.924 --> 00:11:56.962
  • We are an open book, and we've lived that way.
  • 00:11:56.962 --> 00:12:01.233
  • And in ministry, i've learned you have to be that way.
  • 00:12:01.233 --> 00:12:04.370
  • You don't want the enemy to use anything against you.
  • 00:12:04.370 --> 00:12:06.572
  • But that can go too far.
  • 00:12:06.572 --> 00:12:07.840
  • And in times where i would either use the pulpit to vent,
  • 00:12:07.840 --> 00:12:11.644
  • And my dad would say, that's a great story for another time,
  • 00:12:11.644 --> 00:12:14.747
  • Amie, when he was really teaching me and mentoring me
  • 00:12:14.747 --> 00:12:17.716
  • In communication and ministry, and then it was my close
  • 00:12:17.716 --> 00:12:21.687
  • Friends.
  • 00:12:21.687 --> 00:12:22.555
  • So, when i sat on the mercy seat,
  • 00:12:22.555 --> 00:12:23.923
  • The lord convicted me of oversharing and gave me
  • 00:12:23.923 --> 00:12:28.327
  • Examples right then to share.
  • 00:12:28.327 --> 00:12:30.930
  • And i always admonish the women,
  • 00:12:30.930 --> 00:12:35.935
  • Take the mercy seat home with you.
  • 00:12:35.935 --> 00:12:37.436
  • This isn't something that stays here.
  • 00:12:37.436 --> 00:12:39.138
  • So, when the lord begins to convict you of something,
  • 00:12:39.138 --> 00:12:42.341
  • Even when you're in the middle of it, stop yourself.
  • 00:12:42.341 --> 00:12:46.512
  • Correct yourself and return to the top.
  • 00:12:46.512 --> 00:12:49.582
  • So, i began to do this.
  • 00:12:49.582 --> 00:12:52.651
  • At first, i would wait.
  • 00:12:52.651 --> 00:12:55.521
  • I'd really feel convicted later on after a conversation,
  • 00:12:55.521 --> 00:12:58.657
  • Say, i'd go out to dinner with my friends,
  • 00:12:58.657 --> 00:13:00.025
  • And then i'd go home, and then i would start feeling the holy
  • 00:13:00.025 --> 00:13:02.828
  • Spirit going, amie, that was too much.
  • 00:13:02.828 --> 00:13:05.497
  • And you need to repent.
  • 00:13:05.497 --> 00:13:08.434
  • So, i would text them all and say, i am really sorry.
  • 00:13:08.434 --> 00:13:10.736
  • I need to hold myself accountable.
  • 00:13:10.736 --> 00:13:12.404
  • I went too far.
  • 00:13:12.404 --> 00:13:13.906
  • And the first response i always get is, oh, no,
  • 00:13:13.906 --> 00:13:16.976
  • I'm a safe place.
  • 00:13:16.976 --> 00:13:18.010
  • It's okay.
  • 00:13:18.010 --> 00:13:18.878
  • And they're right.
  • 00:13:18.878 --> 00:13:20.112
  • But i would have to then say, but god has called me to a
  • 00:13:20.112 --> 00:13:23.315
  • Higher level.
  • 00:13:23.315 --> 00:13:24.516
  • And there are certain things that they're not secrets,
  • 00:13:24.516 --> 00:13:27.052
  • But they are things that i need to be very careful about
  • 00:13:27.052 --> 00:13:31.657
  • Communicating.
  • 00:13:31.657 --> 00:13:32.424
  • And i burdened you with that.
  • 00:13:32.424 --> 00:13:35.027
  • The lord would give me the right words.
  • 00:13:35.027 --> 00:13:37.162
  • And then, until the point when it was coming out of my mouth,
  • 00:13:37.162 --> 00:13:40.065
  • I would stop myself and say, i'm not supposed to share
  • 00:13:40.065 --> 00:13:44.103
  • That.
  • 00:13:44.103 --> 00:13:44.770
  • I'm sorry.
  • 00:13:44.770 --> 00:13:45.437
  • Or i'd go, nevermind.
  • 00:13:45.437 --> 00:13:47.039
  • And people would try to make me comfortable and say, no,
  • 00:13:47.039 --> 00:13:49.208
  • It's okay.
  • 00:13:49.208 --> 00:13:50.142
  • Because they felt bad about that.
  • 00:13:50.142 --> 00:13:51.744
  • And i said, no, listen, this is a mercy seat for me.
  • 00:13:51.744 --> 00:13:53.946
  • Because if i want the lord to weigh and wait, my words,
  • 00:13:53.946 --> 00:13:57.516
  • Annoying means weight.
  • 00:13:57.516 --> 00:14:00.386
  • And if i want that to happen, then i can't just use my words
  • 00:14:00.386 --> 00:14:07.226
  • Willy-nilly because he's not going to back those up with
  • 00:14:07.226 --> 00:14:11.830
  • Power and anointing.
  • 00:14:11.830 --> 00:14:13.065
  • I've got to withhold some things that might just be easy
  • 00:14:13.065 --> 00:14:17.336
  • To say in a safe environment with your friends or whatever.
  • 00:14:17.336 --> 00:14:23.075
  • So, i have felt the conviction of the holy spirit,
  • 00:14:23.075 --> 00:14:25.978
  • And it seems to always deal with my mouth.
  • 00:14:25.978 --> 00:14:28.180
  • And that's probably because that's how god is the platform
  • 00:14:28.180 --> 00:14:30.582
  • That i have, is communication.
  • 00:14:30.582 --> 00:14:33.152
  • So, it's what gets me in trouble too.
  • 00:14:33.152 --> 00:14:35.721
  • And i have had to repent and return to the top.
  • 00:14:35.721 --> 00:14:39.291
  • And i think it's a living example of going, okay, god,
  • 00:14:39.291 --> 00:14:43.128
  • How can i take the mercy seat with me?
  • 00:14:43.128 --> 00:14:46.165
  • How can i be more like david, where i continually cry out,
  • 00:14:46.165 --> 00:14:50.069
  • Recognize that i've done something and hold myself
  • 00:14:50.069 --> 00:14:54.540
  • Accountable to this?
  • 00:14:54.540 --> 00:14:55.808
  • Because i'm not always going to have someone in my life.
  • 00:14:55.808 --> 00:14:57.609
  • And the more elevated you are, the harder and more
  • 00:14:57.609 --> 00:15:01.580
  • Inconvenient it is for god to get a messenger to you.
  • 00:15:01.580 --> 00:15:04.249
  • Not that you shouldn't have those people in your life,
  • 00:15:04.249 --> 00:15:06.819
  • But god had to send nathan from a far off to find david
  • 00:15:06.819 --> 00:15:10.856
  • To illustrate a story and to tell him something to bring
  • 00:15:10.856 --> 00:15:14.293
  • Conviction when david had lost that nearness and intimacy
  • 00:15:14.293 --> 00:15:18.397
  • With god.
  • 00:15:18.397 --> 00:15:21.500
  • - we find true freedom and intimacy with god because as
  • 00:15:21.500 --> 00:15:24.503
  • We're connected and we realize, i belong to you.
  • 00:15:24.503 --> 00:15:28.407
  • Your opinion is the one that matters about me.
  • 00:15:28.407 --> 00:15:31.443
  • Your evaluation is the one that counts.
  • 00:15:31.443 --> 00:15:34.079
  • And you love me.
  • 00:15:34.079 --> 00:15:35.581
  • I belong to you.
  • 00:15:35.581 --> 00:15:37.383
  • I don't have to prove anything.
  • 00:15:37.383 --> 00:15:39.118
  • There's a freedom to be found.
  • 00:15:39.118 --> 00:15:41.353
  • I'm not performing my way into something.
  • 00:15:41.353 --> 00:15:44.556
  • I'm not trying to be something i'm not.
  • 00:15:44.556 --> 00:15:46.392
  • I'm already loved.
  • 00:15:46.392 --> 00:15:47.359
  • I'm already accepted.
  • 00:15:47.359 --> 00:15:49.028
  • This is true freedom.
  • 00:15:49.028 --> 00:15:51.930
  • - if you feel today like you are just caught in a cycle
  • 00:15:53.098 --> 00:15:55.567
  • Where you're repeating the same sin and having to confess
  • 00:15:55.567 --> 00:15:58.037
  • It, just causes more shame.
  • 00:15:58.037 --> 00:15:59.772
  • I want to encourage you in this,
  • 00:15:59.772 --> 00:16:03.842
  • That as you begin to walk out through the gift of
  • 00:16:03.842 --> 00:16:06.345
  • Accountable relationship, the bible tells us that if we
  • 00:16:06.345 --> 00:16:11.417
  • Confess our sins one to another, we will be healed.
  • 00:16:11.417 --> 00:16:13.719
  • That means we move forward.
  • 00:16:13.719 --> 00:16:15.554
  • We're no longer broken in the same ways that we were broken.
  • 00:16:15.554 --> 00:16:20.325
  • So, there is a promise of new life,
  • 00:16:20.325 --> 00:16:22.594
  • And jesus promises us that he makes all things new.
  • 00:16:22.594 --> 00:16:27.733
  • So, i want to encourage you today to keep going,
  • 00:16:27.733 --> 00:16:30.202
  • Even if you feel like you're repeating some of the same,
  • 00:16:30.202 --> 00:16:34.773
  • All of us are tested in similar ways,
  • 00:16:34.773 --> 00:16:37.676
  • And it takes a lot of living to understand that sometimes
  • 00:16:37.676 --> 00:16:42.181
  • It takes time to overcome things,
  • 00:16:42.181 --> 00:16:44.116
  • But continue to do the right thing for the right reason,
  • 00:16:44.116 --> 00:16:47.419
  • And god's going to meet you there.
  • 00:16:47.419 --> 00:16:50.456
  • - our better together community is built on love and
  • 00:16:50.556 --> 00:16:53.826
  • Friendship.
  • 00:16:53.826 --> 00:16:54.560
  • And we want you to join us.
  • 00:16:54.560 --> 00:16:55.894
  • Follow us on social media to make friends with women all
  • 00:16:55.894 --> 00:16:58.597
  • Over the world.
  • 00:16:58.597 --> 00:17:01.400
  • - let's keep the conversation going.
  • 00:17:01.500 --> 00:17:03.335
  • You can find the better together podcast on your
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  • Favorite listening platform, subscribe today.
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  • (music playing)
  • 00:17:08.874 --> 00:17:11.996
  • (music playing)
  • 00:17:11.996 --> 00:17:14.546
  • - i just want to be the kind of person that is soft before
  • 00:17:15.781 --> 00:17:18.951
  • The lord, no matter what god calls me to that may require
  • 00:17:18.951 --> 00:17:22.588
  • Armor for other jobs, but to be easily correctable because
  • 00:17:22.588 --> 00:17:29.228
  • I want to be a student, i want to receive instruction,
  • 00:17:29.228 --> 00:17:32.731
  • But i've found that if you reject instruction,
  • 00:17:32.731 --> 00:17:35.601
  • You definitely reject correction.
  • 00:17:35.601 --> 00:17:38.837
  • And i think god tests us in this no matter who we are,
  • 00:17:38.837 --> 00:17:42.074
  • Whatever level is, are you too elevated in your own eyes to
  • 00:17:42.074 --> 00:17:48.180
  • Receive correction?
  • 00:17:48.180 --> 00:17:51.316
  • Can i still continually, like clay molds you into my image.
  • 00:17:51.316 --> 00:17:57.923
  • Don't get so set in stone.
  • 00:17:57.923 --> 00:17:59.625
  • And i'm always learning and always having to repent,
  • 00:17:59.625 --> 00:18:03.462
  • Whether it's to my children or to my husband.
  • 00:18:03.462 --> 00:18:05.164
  • And i'm grateful that i'm not ever too far gone that the
  • 00:18:05.164 --> 00:18:06.698
  • Lord doesn't speak a word to prick my spirit and say,
  • 00:18:06.698 --> 00:18:10.602
  • You could do better than that.
  • 00:18:10.602 --> 00:18:13.639
  • The thing is, is that you know the difference when it's god's
  • 00:18:13.639 --> 00:18:17.843
  • Voice or when it's the enemy's voice,
  • 00:18:17.843 --> 00:18:20.412
  • Because the enemy always speaks in a voice of
  • 00:18:20.412 --> 00:18:23.982
  • Disqualification.
  • 00:18:23.982 --> 00:18:25.684
  • Shame.
  • 00:18:25.684 --> 00:18:27.753
  • But god's voice is always, you can do better than that.
  • 00:18:27.753 --> 00:18:32.991
  • I created you for more than this.
  • 00:18:32.991 --> 00:18:35.627
  • You know better.
  • 00:18:35.627 --> 00:18:36.995
  • I've given you wisdom.
  • 00:18:36.995 --> 00:18:38.130
  • It speaks to you from the high place.
  • 00:18:38.130 --> 00:18:40.232
  • Come back up here where you belong.
  • 00:18:40.232 --> 00:18:42.401
  • - it's beautiful.
  • 00:18:42.868 --> 00:18:44.303
  • God loves you.
  • 00:18:44.403 --> 00:18:45.637
  • God sees you.
  • 00:18:45.637 --> 00:18:46.738
  • God knows you.
  • 00:18:46.738 --> 00:18:47.873
  • You cannot get out of his sight or out of his grip.
  • 00:18:47.873 --> 00:18:52.244
  • And the more you turn towards god in your time of need,
  • 00:18:52.244 --> 00:18:58.750
  • He is with open arms, baby.
  • 00:18:58.750 --> 00:19:01.753
  • He is there for you to be everything.
  • 00:19:01.753 --> 00:19:04.489
  • You don't have to prove anything to god.
  • 00:19:04.489 --> 00:19:06.625
  • He knows you, he sees you, he made you, you are his,
  • 00:19:06.625 --> 00:19:10.729
  • You belong to him anyway.
  • 00:19:10.729 --> 00:19:12.331
  • And so, when you come to realize that i am yours and
  • 00:19:12.331 --> 00:19:15.534
  • You love me, that will change your life.
  • 00:19:15.534 --> 00:19:20.038
  • That will set you free, that will take you to places that
  • 00:19:20.038 --> 00:19:23.408
  • You never dreamed, that will take you a place in god that
  • 00:19:23.408 --> 00:19:27.045
  • You've never known a love like his.
  • 00:19:27.045 --> 00:19:30.215
  • - i love that understanding of the word because i do tend to
  • 00:19:30.315 --> 00:19:33.719
  • Have this picture of repentance on your face in
  • 00:19:33.719 --> 00:19:37.022
  • The carpet.
  • 00:19:37.022 --> 00:19:38.323
  • But this idea of being called to be who you really are and
  • 00:19:38.323 --> 00:19:41.193
  • To come closer.
  • 00:19:41.193 --> 00:19:42.394
  • That's the thing i love about the difference between
  • 00:19:42.394 --> 00:19:44.496
  • Condemnation and conviction, because it seems to me that
  • 00:19:44.496 --> 00:19:48.667
  • Condemnation pushes you further away,
  • 00:19:48.667 --> 00:19:50.535
  • Whereas conviction beckons you back home.
  • 00:19:50.535 --> 00:19:53.238
  • I had the weird experience with that one day.
  • 00:19:53.238 --> 00:19:56.108
  • I was at the nail salon, and i wasn't getting my nails done,
  • 00:19:56.108 --> 00:20:00.012
  • I was just getting my feet done.
  • 00:20:00.012 --> 00:20:01.513
  • So, i'm sitting there with my feet in a basin of hot water,
  • 00:20:01.513 --> 00:20:04.883
  • And the lord brings this name to my mind.
  • 00:20:04.883 --> 00:20:07.519
  • And i'm like, oh, gosh, i haven't talked to them in
  • 00:20:07.519 --> 00:20:10.589
  • Years.
  • 00:20:10.589 --> 00:20:11.957
  • And i felt like i was supposed to contact that person and ask
  • 00:20:11.957 --> 00:20:14.693
  • Them to forgive me.
  • 00:20:14.693 --> 00:20:16.128
  • And i said, but honestly, lord,
  • 00:20:16.128 --> 00:20:17.596
  • What i said to them was in response to what they said to
  • 00:20:17.596 --> 00:20:21.133
  • Me.
  • 00:20:21.133 --> 00:20:22.434
  • I don't know why i have these conversations with the lord.
  • 00:20:22.434 --> 00:20:24.336
  • It was actually when i ended up spending a month in a psych
  • 00:20:24.336 --> 00:20:31.009
  • Hospital, and this person who'd been a really close
  • 00:20:31.009 --> 00:20:33.645
  • Friend, wrote to me and said, i'm so disappointed in you.
  • 00:20:33.645 --> 00:20:36.415
  • I thought you were better than this,
  • 00:20:36.415 --> 00:20:39.151
  • And you'll never be in ministry again.
  • 00:20:39.151 --> 00:20:41.887
  • I had tried to connect with them and say, listen,
  • 00:20:41.887 --> 00:20:44.956
  • Tell me everything you're feeling.
  • 00:20:44.956 --> 00:20:46.425
  • I want to hear you.
  • 00:20:46.425 --> 00:20:47.859
  • But it was a disaster.
  • 00:20:47.859 --> 00:20:49.594
  • It didn't work at all.
  • 00:20:49.594 --> 00:20:50.696
  • So, i was like, lord, this seems unusual to me,
  • 00:20:50.696 --> 00:20:53.498
  • Plus i don't think i have their phone number anymore.
  • 00:20:53.498 --> 00:20:56.368
  • And i'm like, i'm sitting with my feet in hot water and i've
  • 00:20:56.368 --> 00:21:00.672
  • Been called to wash his feet.
  • 00:21:00.672 --> 00:21:03.008
  • So, i was like, okay.
  • 00:21:03.008 --> 00:21:06.311
  • So, i text this person and i said,
  • 00:21:06.311 --> 00:21:09.014
  • I know it's been a long time since we've been in touch
  • 00:21:09.014 --> 00:21:10.882
  • Because i felt the lord also say,
  • 00:21:10.882 --> 00:21:13.285
  • You say nothing about them.
  • 00:21:13.285 --> 00:21:15.654
  • All i'm asking you to do is own your part.
  • 00:21:15.654 --> 00:21:18.457
  • So, i was like, i'm right to ask you please to forgive me
  • 00:21:18.457 --> 00:21:21.126
  • For my response to you some time ago and for the breakdown
  • 00:21:21.126 --> 00:21:25.130
  • In our relationship.
  • 00:21:25.130 --> 00:21:26.465
  • And i expected to get nothing back because the last time i
  • 00:21:26.465 --> 00:21:30.435
  • Talked to them, which had been years before,
  • 00:21:30.435 --> 00:21:31.703
  • They were furious with me.
  • 00:21:31.703 --> 00:21:33.338
  • And almost immediately, i heard back from this person
  • 00:21:33.338 --> 00:21:37.776
  • Saying, you have no idea what this means to me.
  • 00:21:37.776 --> 00:21:41.313
  • I was going through some stuff of my own.
  • 00:21:41.313 --> 00:21:43.982
  • And sometimes it's easier to punish other people than have
  • 00:21:43.982 --> 00:21:48.954
  • To deal with what's actually going on in our own life.
  • 00:21:48.954 --> 00:21:50.655
  • But what i've discovered about repentance is,
  • 00:21:50.655 --> 00:21:52.891
  • It's such a gift.
  • 00:21:52.891 --> 00:21:54.426
  • It's just this beautiful.
  • 00:21:54.426 --> 00:21:56.261
  • It sounds like this old-fashioned big honking
  • 00:21:56.261 --> 00:21:58.230
  • Word, but it's just this beautiful gift.
  • 00:21:58.230 --> 00:22:01.867
  • If barry and i have an argument,
  • 00:22:01.867 --> 00:22:03.402
  • And i overreact to something, if he says something that
  • 00:22:03.402 --> 00:22:06.605
  • Makes me feel like i'm five years old again,
  • 00:22:06.605 --> 00:22:09.408
  • Or presses some kind of button and i react instead of
  • 00:22:09.408 --> 00:22:13.412
  • Responding in a way.
  • 00:22:13.412 --> 00:22:15.347
  • I've discovered the joy of repentance.
  • 00:22:15.347 --> 00:22:17.482
  • I will always a drop to my knees.
  • 00:22:17.482 --> 00:22:20.786
  • And i'm like, father, forgive me.
  • 00:22:20.786 --> 00:22:24.055
  • That's why i love what you share.
  • 00:22:24.055 --> 00:22:26.758
  • I feel like i'm being called to stand up in his presence.
  • 00:22:26.758 --> 00:22:29.861
  • - if someone were to ask, can you be a christian without
  • 00:22:31.062 --> 00:22:33.899
  • Practicing repentance?
  • 00:22:33.899 --> 00:22:36.001
  • I would say no, because then my question would be,
  • 00:22:36.001 --> 00:22:39.237
  • Is the god that you follow really god,
  • 00:22:39.237 --> 00:22:43.542
  • Or is it your idea of god that's convenient for your
  • 00:22:43.542 --> 00:22:47.412
  • Life?
  • 00:22:47.412 --> 00:22:48.613
  • You see, jesus is holy.
  • 00:22:48.613 --> 00:22:50.982
  • And if we love, serve, and follow a holy god,
  • 00:22:50.982 --> 00:22:56.488
  • Then we are aware of our lack of holiness.
  • 00:22:56.488 --> 00:22:59.257
  • And that requires a repentance.
  • 00:22:59.257 --> 00:23:01.860
  • To become more like him requires repentance.
  • 00:23:01.860 --> 00:23:05.764
  • To have a pure heart requires repentance.
  • 00:23:05.764 --> 00:23:08.433
  • And so, this is something that should be actively a part of
  • 00:23:08.433 --> 00:23:11.703
  • Every christian's walk.
  • 00:23:11.703 --> 00:23:13.238
  • - the lord discipline's the ones he loves.
  • 00:23:14.206 --> 00:23:16.508
  • So, i can look at this with shame of, oh, man,
  • 00:23:16.508 --> 00:23:19.177
  • I should be better.
  • 00:23:19.177 --> 00:23:20.512
  • I shouldn't have all that.
  • 00:23:20.512 --> 00:23:21.413
  • But actually, you believe in me.
  • 00:23:21.413 --> 00:23:24.182
  • You know that i can.
  • 00:23:24.182 --> 00:23:26.051
  • You think about people who are lost causes, you're like,
  • 00:23:26.051 --> 00:23:28.086
  • You're not going to get in there and try.
  • 00:23:28.086 --> 00:23:29.855
  • You're just like, okay, you're going to do what you're going
  • 00:23:29.855 --> 00:23:31.256
  • To do.
  • 00:23:31.256 --> 00:23:32.357
  • The fact that he believes in us enough to, hey,
  • 00:23:32.357 --> 00:23:35.560
  • I'm guiding you.
  • 00:23:35.560 --> 00:23:36.561
  • Hey, i'm calling you higher.
  • 00:23:36.561 --> 00:23:38.330
  • This is who you really are.
  • 00:23:38.330 --> 00:23:39.698
  • We're going to stand up in it because i know we can.
  • 00:23:39.698 --> 00:23:41.433
  • We can together.
  • 00:23:41.433 --> 00:23:43.134
  • And i think cutting that shame out of it because that's the
  • 00:23:43.134 --> 00:23:46.605
  • Thing that's killer.
  • 00:23:46.605 --> 00:23:48.006
  • - absolutely.
  • 00:23:48.006 --> 00:23:49.307
  • - and like we're saying, the voice of the lord never comes
  • 00:23:49.307 --> 00:23:50.809
  • With shame, condemnation.
  • 00:23:50.809 --> 00:23:52.244
  • And if i'm hearing it in his voice,
  • 00:23:52.244 --> 00:23:54.880
  • I need to address what's going on on the inside and then
  • 00:23:54.880 --> 00:23:59.184
  • Bringing us all the way to the point where,
  • 00:23:59.184 --> 00:24:00.952
  • There's things that we know, i did that wrong.
  • 00:24:00.952 --> 00:24:03.622
  • I need to go before the lord.
  • 00:24:03.622 --> 00:24:05.223
  • I need to confess that, make that right.
  • 00:24:05.223 --> 00:24:08.827
  • We also see in david there's a search me and know me because
  • 00:24:08.827 --> 00:24:13.431
  • I might not see it, but my eyes,
  • 00:24:13.431 --> 00:24:17.035
  • My evaluation is not the one i'm living for here.
  • 00:24:17.035 --> 00:24:19.337
  • So, search me and know me.
  • 00:24:19.337 --> 00:24:20.772
  • If there's anything offensive in me, would you show me?
  • 00:24:20.772 --> 00:24:24.242
  • And i come underneath that.
  • 00:24:24.242 --> 00:24:26.211
  • That's the standard.
  • 00:24:26.211 --> 00:24:28.213
  • Not how i feel about it.
  • 00:24:28.213 --> 00:24:29.381
  • Not what i think is right or wrong.
  • 00:24:29.381 --> 00:24:31.082
  • All over in the psalms, do we have, you are god and i'm not.
  • 00:24:31.082 --> 00:24:34.085
  • So, i'm coming underneath your word, your evaluation,
  • 00:24:34.085 --> 00:24:39.324
  • Your standards.
  • 00:24:39.324 --> 00:24:40.926
  • And to have him call us higher is because he knows we can
  • 00:24:40.926 --> 00:24:44.663
  • Through him.
  • 00:24:44.663 --> 00:24:45.330
  • He believes in me.
  • 00:24:45.330 --> 00:24:46.264
  • It's love, it's a vote of confidence.
  • 00:24:46.264 --> 00:24:48.567
  • It's, hey, i'm not leaving you.
  • 00:24:48.567 --> 00:24:50.468
  • I've got you.
  • 00:24:50.468 --> 00:24:51.870
  • We'll do this together so we can have the courage to
  • 00:24:51.870 --> 00:24:54.773
  • Actually say, i know i don't see everything here.
  • 00:24:54.773 --> 00:24:58.910
  • I'm not my own.
  • 00:24:58.910 --> 00:25:00.211
  • I'm not growing myself up.
  • 00:25:00.211 --> 00:25:02.814
  • That's your job.
  • 00:25:02.814 --> 00:25:03.882
  • So, i'm coming underneath your voice.
  • 00:25:03.882 --> 00:25:05.817
  • Search me and know me.
  • 00:25:05.817 --> 00:25:07.052
  • If there's anything you want to point out, you get to.
  • 00:25:07.052 --> 00:25:10.822
  • I'm here and i'm available.
  • 00:25:10.822 --> 00:25:12.357
  • - and i think the fruit of repentance is joy,
  • 00:25:12.357 --> 00:25:14.593
  • Because that's what i felt that day.
  • 00:25:14.593 --> 00:25:16.328
  • I felt like this overwhelming, bubbling joy.
  • 00:25:16.328 --> 00:25:18.863
  • It was a restored relationship.
  • 00:25:18.863 --> 00:25:20.899
  • It was great.
  • 00:25:20.899 --> 00:25:21.766
  • When we're called living sacrifices,
  • 00:25:21.766 --> 00:25:26.538
  • Nobody consulted the goat in the old testament.
  • 00:25:26.538 --> 00:25:29.407
  • How do you feel about it?
  • 00:25:29.407 --> 00:25:30.508
  • Feel like this is your day or not?
  • 00:25:30.508 --> 00:25:32.277
  • But the fact that we're called living sacrifices means that
  • 00:25:32.277 --> 00:25:36.081
  • We can crawl back off the altar when it gets too hot.
  • 00:25:36.081 --> 00:25:38.416
  • But when god calls you back into line with his word,
  • 00:25:38.416 --> 00:25:42.153
  • With everything, it just brings joy.
  • 00:25:42.153 --> 00:25:45.657
  • It's a gift.
  • 00:25:45.657 --> 00:25:48.460
  • - when we find ourselves in a situation where i know i've
  • 00:25:48.460 --> 00:25:51.129
  • Sinned, i've fallen short, i didn't live up to the thing
  • 00:25:51.129 --> 00:25:54.132
  • That i've been given in jesus.
  • 00:25:54.132 --> 00:25:56.034
  • First step, always is you run to the father,
  • 00:25:56.034 --> 00:26:00.472
  • You approach him.
  • 00:26:00.472 --> 00:26:01.606
  • Shame will tell you go hide, find the fig leaves,
  • 00:26:01.606 --> 00:26:05.043
  • Fix yourself, and then approach.
  • 00:26:05.043 --> 00:26:07.078
  • But the reality is, we cannot make ourselves clean.
  • 00:26:07.078 --> 00:26:09.614
  • That's what the blood of jesus is for.
  • 00:26:09.614 --> 00:26:11.916
  • And so it says, when you come, you confess your sins,
  • 00:26:11.916 --> 00:26:14.853
  • He's faithful and just to forgive us and cleanse us from
  • 00:26:14.853 --> 00:26:18.556
  • All unrighteousness.
  • 00:26:18.556 --> 00:26:19.858
  • Just come to him, confess and receive all that jesus died
  • 00:26:19.858 --> 00:26:24.896
  • For.
  • 00:26:24.896 --> 00:26:26.364
  • - it's very difficult to discern the will of god when
  • 00:26:26.364 --> 00:26:28.767
  • You are living with lots of unrepented sin because you're
  • 00:26:28.767 --> 00:26:34.072
  • Avoiding parts of your life and of yourself.
  • 00:26:34.072 --> 00:26:40.145
  • And i found when i asked the lord if he's been quiet or if
  • 00:26:40.145 --> 00:26:43.581
  • I'm not hearing what i want to hear,
  • 00:26:43.581 --> 00:26:46.351
  • How have i grieved your holy spirit?
  • 00:26:46.351 --> 00:26:48.853
  • Is there something that i need to repent for?
  • 00:26:48.853 --> 00:26:52.357
  • And i think it's a good question here.
  • 00:26:52.357 --> 00:26:54.893
  • How do we practice repentance?
  • 00:26:54.893 --> 00:26:59.030
  • It may be a foreign subject to people who are watching going,
  • 00:26:59.030 --> 00:27:02.434
  • I don't want to admit that i'm wrong because humanism teaches
  • 00:27:02.434 --> 00:27:06.604
  • Us completely-- it's like, give me a self-help but don't
  • 00:27:06.604 --> 00:27:09.474
  • Search me.
  • 00:27:09.474 --> 00:27:10.375
  • Let me go.
  • 00:27:10.375 --> 00:27:11.476
  • I want to see what's wrong with me and write my own
  • 00:27:11.476 --> 00:27:13.712
  • Prescription.
  • 00:27:13.712 --> 00:27:14.679
  • I don't want to be vulnerable.
  • 00:27:14.679 --> 00:27:17.248
  • So, repentance requires that we are vulnerable with people.
  • 00:27:17.248 --> 00:27:20.285
  • And you could have called and gotten a rejection.
  • 00:27:20.285 --> 00:27:22.887
  • You had to take that risk.
  • 00:27:22.887 --> 00:27:24.422
  • I think that's why repentance, whether it's to god or man,
  • 00:27:24.422 --> 00:27:27.358
  • Is a scary subject for a lot of people.
  • 00:27:27.358 --> 00:27:29.894
  • - repentance to the lord is the easiest thing you could
  • 00:27:29.894 --> 00:27:32.897
  • Possibly do because he's the all forgiving one.
  • 00:27:32.897 --> 00:27:35.700
  • He's the one that has such mercy and grace.
  • 00:27:35.700 --> 00:27:38.737
  • I love how when david said create in me.
  • 00:27:38.737 --> 00:27:42.640
  • To create in me was, i don't have it.
  • 00:27:42.640 --> 00:27:47.278
  • You have to create in me a clean heart and to restore a
  • 00:27:47.278 --> 00:27:55.687
  • Right spirit.
  • 00:27:55.687 --> 00:27:56.988
  • That means give me something that i do not have and help me
  • 00:27:56.988 --> 00:28:02.026
  • Have a right spirit.
  • 00:28:02.026 --> 00:28:04.696
  • And the more he fell in love with god,
  • 00:28:04.696 --> 00:28:06.965
  • The more he hated sin.
  • 00:28:06.965 --> 00:28:10.602
  • - in that verse, different translations say different
  • 00:28:11.736 --> 00:28:14.672
  • Things.
  • 00:28:14.672 --> 00:28:15.740
  • Most ones we memorize is new king james, it says,
  • 00:28:15.740 --> 00:28:17.709
  • Restore in me a right spirit.
  • 00:28:17.709 --> 00:28:19.844
  • But other versions say, a loyal spirit, like i read,
  • 00:28:19.844 --> 00:28:22.847
  • Or a steadfast spirit.
  • 00:28:22.847 --> 00:28:25.817
  • That really speaks to me because i can hit high points
  • 00:28:25.817 --> 00:28:29.888
  • With god, and then also hit low points.
  • 00:28:29.888 --> 00:28:33.625
  • And what david cried out for is,
  • 00:28:33.625 --> 00:28:35.193
  • I want a heart that's consistent,
  • 00:28:35.193 --> 00:28:37.662
  • That i stay at the top.
  • 00:28:37.662 --> 00:28:39.731
  • That i don't just fall off in my belief in myself or in
  • 00:28:39.731 --> 00:28:42.467
  • Other people, and that i miss it so gravely after doing such
  • 00:28:42.467 --> 00:28:46.571
  • Great things.
  • 00:28:46.571 --> 00:28:48.306
  • I think a new heart in his mind was something that is
  • 00:28:48.306 --> 00:28:52.310
  • Consistently loyal to the will of god, which is beautiful.
  • 00:28:52.310 --> 00:28:56.514
  • - the more i know about god, the more i love him.
  • 00:28:57.582 --> 00:29:00.718
  • The more of his grace i receive,
  • 00:29:00.718 --> 00:29:02.987
  • It calls me to repentance.
  • 00:29:02.987 --> 00:29:06.024
  • And so, the more i fall in love with jesus,
  • 00:29:06.024 --> 00:29:09.260
  • The more i turn against sin, the more i hate sin,
  • 00:29:09.260 --> 00:29:13.398
  • The more i do not want sin to rule over anything in my life.
  • 00:29:13.398 --> 00:29:18.303
  • And falling in love with jesus is just getting to know him.
  • 00:29:18.303 --> 00:29:22.240
  • You give him a chance, you taste and see that the lord is
  • 00:29:22.240 --> 00:29:25.777
  • Good.
  • 00:29:25.777 --> 00:29:26.344
  • That's all you need.
  • 00:29:26.344 --> 00:29:28.446
  • - you could really empathize with those that when they
  • 00:29:28.446 --> 00:29:32.450
  • Think about repentance, it's a scary thing because i think
  • 00:29:32.450 --> 00:29:36.621
  • It's easy for us to say, oh, this is great.
  • 00:29:36.621 --> 00:29:42.093
  • Happy are those, blessed are those whose transgressions are
  • 00:29:42.093 --> 00:29:44.896
  • Forgiven.
  • 00:29:44.896 --> 00:29:46.130
  • But then in reality, are people trustworthy of our
  • 00:29:46.130 --> 00:29:51.636
  • Deepest, darkest cuts.
  • 00:29:51.636 --> 00:29:53.004
  • And i know that although in theory they should be,
  • 00:29:53.004 --> 00:29:57.742
  • And we should have church cultures that allow for the
  • 00:29:57.742 --> 00:30:02.046
  • Mess, that allow for our brokenness.
  • 00:30:02.046 --> 00:30:03.848
  • Let's just be honest.
  • 00:30:03.848 --> 00:30:05.583
  • There could be a lot of shame-based church cultures.
  • 00:30:05.583 --> 00:30:09.721
  • There can be shame-based family cultures.
  • 00:30:09.721 --> 00:30:12.991
  • And i'm just thinking about anybody that might be even
  • 00:30:12.991 --> 00:30:18.529
  • Listening in today that might be hearing this and feeling
  • 00:30:18.529 --> 00:30:22.233
  • Like, well, that's easy for someone else to say.
  • 00:30:22.233 --> 00:30:25.336
  • They may have a lot of christian friends.
  • 00:30:25.336 --> 00:30:27.005
  • And they may have a lot of people that they could confess
  • 00:30:27.005 --> 00:30:29.707
  • To, and it's easy for them.
  • 00:30:29.707 --> 00:30:31.276
  • But that doesn't exist where i am.
  • 00:30:31.276 --> 00:30:36.281
  • The first thing that adam and eve did when they messed up
  • 00:30:36.281 --> 00:30:42.353
  • Was they hid, and they clothed themselves.
  • 00:30:42.353 --> 00:30:45.823
  • They covered themselves.
  • 00:30:45.823 --> 00:30:48.092
  • But god, he says, where are you?
  • 00:30:48.092 --> 00:30:51.229
  • He didn't say, what did you do?
  • 00:30:51.229 --> 00:30:55.366
  • If i hear a weird noise in my house, i'm thinking,
  • 00:30:55.366 --> 00:30:58.002
  • What did you do?
  • 00:30:58.002 --> 00:31:00.038
  • Or if something happens, like i see a spill, it's always,
  • 00:31:00.038 --> 00:31:03.608
  • What did you do?
  • 00:31:03.608 --> 00:31:04.575
  • It's very rarely, where are you?
  • 00:31:04.575 --> 00:31:06.778
  • Which shows me that what god cares about more in that
  • 00:31:06.778 --> 00:31:11.115
  • Moment is not that we fix our behavior, that comes after,
  • 00:31:11.115 --> 00:31:17.021
  • But it's the proximity.
  • 00:31:17.021 --> 00:31:18.122
  • It's a relationship.
  • 00:31:18.122 --> 00:31:22.860
  • It's not that, oh, you have to confess so that i could
  • 00:31:22.860 --> 00:31:27.632
  • Forgive you, but i want you to confess so that you could know
  • 00:31:27.632 --> 00:31:33.037
  • My forgiveness and grace.
  • 00:31:33.037 --> 00:31:35.740
  • I want you to confess so that this divisiveness between us,
  • 00:31:35.740 --> 00:31:42.947
  • This rift can be healed.
  • 00:31:42.947 --> 00:31:45.383
  • God cared so much about the closeness.
  • 00:31:45.383 --> 00:31:49.520
  • And i think sometimes we could really take the behavior
  • 00:31:49.520 --> 00:31:53.858
  • Modification aspect of it to a whole nother level.
  • 00:31:53.858 --> 00:31:57.595
  • I mean, i've experienced church cultures that are like
  • 00:31:57.595 --> 00:32:00.999
  • That, where it's just repent, repent, repent,
  • 00:32:00.999 --> 00:32:04.702
  • Almost to the point where it became a religious yoke upon
  • 00:32:04.702 --> 00:32:08.239
  • Us.
  • 00:32:08.239 --> 00:32:09.507
  • But yet, we know the gospel is that repentance is a good
  • 00:32:09.507 --> 00:32:13.077
  • Thing.
  • 00:32:13.077 --> 00:32:14.345
  • It's a gift, but it's a gift when we know why he wants us
  • 00:32:14.345 --> 00:32:18.149
  • To repent.
  • 00:32:18.149 --> 00:32:19.517
  • When we know what god actually wants from us,
  • 00:32:19.517 --> 00:32:23.521
  • Which is not for us to, like you're saying,
  • 00:32:23.521 --> 00:32:26.224
  • To just go down and grovel, but he's saying,
  • 00:32:26.224 --> 00:32:29.927
  • Where are you?
  • 00:32:29.927 --> 00:32:30.595
  • Where is your heart?
  • 00:32:30.595 --> 00:32:31.796
  • And if anybody feels that distance from the lord,
  • 00:32:31.796 --> 00:32:35.600
  • And it's been a while since you've really come to with god
  • 00:32:35.600 --> 00:32:39.404
  • And had an honest self-reflection in prayer,
  • 00:32:39.404 --> 00:32:43.041
  • I don't think god is like, oh, here's a list of things that i
  • 00:32:43.041 --> 00:32:47.578
  • Want you to clean up and fix before we get things right.
  • 00:32:47.578 --> 00:32:51.582
  • Now, let's get things right, and then that will empower you
  • 00:32:51.582 --> 00:32:55.920
  • To clean things up.
  • 00:32:55.920 --> 00:32:57.889
  • (music playing)
  • 00:32:57.889 --> 00:33:05.329
  • - we are behind the scenes at better together,
  • 00:33:05.329 --> 00:33:07.832
  • And we're going to be talking about accountability.
  • 00:33:07.832 --> 00:33:10.435
  • - yeah.
  • 00:33:10.435 --> 00:33:11.702
  • Massive, massive topic.
  • 00:33:11.702 --> 00:33:13.638
  • Super important.
  • 00:33:13.638 --> 00:33:14.806
  • I feel like, growing up, you had these accountability
  • 00:33:14.906 --> 00:33:17.475
  • Partners, but it was always this dynamic of,
  • 00:33:17.475 --> 00:33:19.977
  • What does this going to look like?
  • 00:33:19.977 --> 00:33:21.813
  • Are you judging me?
  • 00:33:21.813 --> 00:33:23.448
  • What are we aiming for?
  • 00:33:23.448 --> 00:33:26.951
  • What's the purpose?
  • 00:33:26.951 --> 00:33:28.352
  • And i think accountability, we're meant to be in
  • 00:33:28.352 --> 00:33:30.588
  • Community.
  • 00:33:30.588 --> 00:33:31.489
  • We're meant to known by other people.
  • 00:33:31.489 --> 00:33:33.024
  • We're meant to have our lives laid out for others because
  • 00:33:33.024 --> 00:33:37.762
  • It's safety.
  • 00:33:37.762 --> 00:33:38.763
  • It's the design of the lord to be known.
  • 00:33:38.763 --> 00:33:40.932
  • How does it get judgy?
  • 00:33:40.932 --> 00:33:42.033
  • You know what i'm saying?
  • 00:33:42.033 --> 00:33:44.068
  • [over talk] because then you want to hide in shame.
  • 00:33:44.068 --> 00:33:47.505
  • So, what does it look like to have a space where the tone of
  • 00:33:47.505 --> 00:33:51.642
  • Accountability?
  • 00:33:51.642 --> 00:33:52.977
  • And i think, for me, and then i want to hear your thoughts.
  • 00:33:52.977 --> 00:33:55.346
  • I feel like if it's out of love and belief of, hey,
  • 00:33:55.346 --> 00:33:58.649
  • This is happening.
  • 00:33:58.649 --> 00:34:01.052
  • I'm seeing this.
  • 00:34:01.052 --> 00:34:02.253
  • Help me understand, and actually inviting the other
  • 00:34:02.253 --> 00:34:04.822
  • Person to speak to it, because sometimes we miss it.
  • 00:34:04.822 --> 00:34:08.025
  • Or we might see it one way and they may be doing something
  • 00:34:08.025 --> 00:34:11.129
  • Different, but opening up and just asking the question to
  • 00:34:11.129 --> 00:34:14.265
  • Understand or to explore that, i think to lay some of the
  • 00:34:14.265 --> 00:34:18.536
  • Groundwork of love that makes these things thrive.
  • 00:34:18.536 --> 00:34:21.539
  • What are you saying?
  • 00:34:21.539 --> 00:34:23.207
  • - i love what you're suggesting,
  • 00:34:23.207 --> 00:34:24.509
  • Is that we really fight for clarity because i feel like
  • 00:34:24.509 --> 00:34:26.911
  • Clarity is a love language, but i think also it's the
  • 00:34:26.911 --> 00:34:30.148
  • Postures of our heart.
  • 00:34:30.148 --> 00:34:31.949
  • I think even if you are judging somebody and you're
  • 00:34:31.949 --> 00:34:36.621
  • Trying not to sound judgy, they're going to feel judged.
  • 00:34:36.621 --> 00:34:39.557
  • - that's right.
  • 00:34:39.557 --> 00:34:41.225
  • As it is.
  • 00:34:41.225 --> 00:34:41.692
  • - and totally.
  • 00:34:41.692 --> 00:34:42.827
  • No matter how great you said it.
  • 00:34:42.827 --> 00:34:44.896
  • So, i think working on the postures of your heart is
  • 00:34:44.896 --> 00:34:49.200
  • Always a great start, making sure that you yourself are a
  • 00:34:49.200 --> 00:34:52.003
  • Safe place together.
  • 00:34:52.003 --> 00:34:54.205
  • - that's so great.
  • 00:34:54.205 --> 00:34:55.506
  • And i think for me, the places where i've experienced it at
  • 00:34:55.506 --> 00:34:57.341
  • Its most powerful are with friends where i know they love
  • 00:34:57.341 --> 00:35:00.578
  • Me.
  • 00:35:00.578 --> 00:35:01.779
  • I know they see me.
  • 00:35:01.779 --> 00:35:03.314
  • They're not just looking for me to fail or do something
  • 00:35:03.314 --> 00:35:05.917
  • Wrong and ready to pounce.
  • 00:35:05.917 --> 00:35:07.251
  • They believe in me, they love me, they've been there for me.
  • 00:35:07.251 --> 00:35:11.055
  • They're willing to fight with me for that thing.
  • 00:35:11.055 --> 00:35:15.026
  • So, when they step in and say something,
  • 00:35:15.026 --> 00:35:17.061
  • It's been in the tone of, hey, here's who i know you are.
  • 00:35:17.061 --> 00:35:21.232
  • You're awesome.
  • 00:35:21.232 --> 00:35:23.134
  • This thing doesn't feel as awesome.
  • 00:35:23.134 --> 00:35:24.969
  • Do you know what i'm saying?
  • 00:35:24.969 --> 00:35:26.304
  • But actually calling me higher doesn't bring me to my lowest
  • 00:35:26.304 --> 00:35:30.341
  • Point.
  • 00:35:30.341 --> 00:35:31.776
  • It's actually, hey, you're amazing.
  • 00:35:31.776 --> 00:35:34.645
  • Talk to me about this thing that's a little less than
  • 00:35:34.645 --> 00:35:36.547
  • Amazing.
  • 00:35:36.547 --> 00:35:37.848
  • And that's always felt like you are called higher up into
  • 00:35:37.848 --> 00:35:40.451
  • Something, i'm believed in.
  • 00:35:40.451 --> 00:35:42.420
  • And those have been the relationships where,
  • 00:35:42.420 --> 00:35:44.488
  • I'm hungry to hear from them about those things.
  • 00:35:44.488 --> 00:35:47.959
  • - i think that's the advice right there.
  • 00:35:47.959 --> 00:35:49.393
  • I think you're not cutting someone down,
  • 00:35:49.393 --> 00:35:51.696
  • You're lifting them higher.
  • 00:35:51.696 --> 00:35:53.097
  • - yes.
  • 00:35:53.097 --> 00:35:54.832
  • - join the conversation on our better together youtube
  • 00:35:56.000 --> 00:35:58.669
  • Channel.
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  • (music playing)
  • 00:36:02.406 --> 00:36:03.991
  • (music playing)
  • 00:36:03.991 --> 00:36:07.279
  • - think about what you said about the shame cultures,
  • 00:36:07.279 --> 00:36:10.415
  • Even in churches, which is such a crazy,
  • 00:36:10.415 --> 00:36:12.551
  • How does that work?
  • 00:36:12.551 --> 00:36:14.486
  • But it does.
  • 00:36:14.486 --> 00:36:15.254
  • It does.
  • 00:36:15.254 --> 00:36:15.921
  • And i've seen it in me.
  • 00:36:15.921 --> 00:36:17.089
  • I've seen that in me or my judgment of other people,
  • 00:36:17.089 --> 00:36:19.157
  • My shame.
  • 00:36:19.157 --> 00:36:20.325
  • And often, for me, it's when i have fallen out of the
  • 00:36:20.325 --> 00:36:23.328
  • Practice of confession and repentance myself,
  • 00:36:23.328 --> 00:36:25.864
  • And i've forgotten how dependent i am on the mercy of
  • 00:36:25.864 --> 00:36:28.367
  • God that i am stingy with other people with it.
  • 00:36:28.367 --> 00:36:31.570
  • Does that make sense in the lord's prayer?
  • 00:36:31.570 --> 00:36:32.838
  • And it's like, forgive our sins as we forgive those who
  • 00:36:32.838 --> 00:36:36.508
  • Sin against us.
  • 00:36:36.508 --> 00:36:37.776
  • It's the two sides.
  • 00:36:37.776 --> 00:36:39.578
  • So, for me, when i feel this, i'm offended,
  • 00:36:39.578 --> 00:36:42.914
  • Or i'm judgmental.
  • 00:36:42.914 --> 00:36:44.116
  • To me, it's a signal of i probably haven't gone before
  • 00:36:44.116 --> 00:36:48.053
  • The lord and encountered his mercy for the things in me.
  • 00:36:48.053 --> 00:36:52.057
  • The self-righteousness, the things that make me feel like
  • 00:36:52.057 --> 00:36:54.493
  • I kind of got it.
  • 00:36:54.493 --> 00:36:55.360
  • I kind of got this down.
  • 00:36:55.360 --> 00:36:56.995
  • I'm good.
  • 00:36:56.995 --> 00:36:58.830
  • A couple years ago, i was in this situation,
  • 00:36:58.830 --> 00:37:01.867
  • And it was like, it wasn't even like this big sin thing.
  • 00:37:01.867 --> 00:37:06.204
  • I was in a conversation with some people in a ministry
  • 00:37:06.204 --> 00:37:08.807
  • Context and a service ended up taking one direction,
  • 00:37:08.807 --> 00:37:11.910
  • But i really felt like it could go a different
  • 00:37:11.910 --> 00:37:14.446
  • Direction.
  • 00:37:14.446 --> 00:37:15.714
  • They're all my friends, but on the inside i'm getting so
  • 00:37:15.714 --> 00:37:19.351
  • Worked up about it.
  • 00:37:19.351 --> 00:37:21.386
  • - i get it.
  • 00:37:21.386 --> 00:37:22.020
  • - just don't judge me.
  • 00:37:22.020 --> 00:37:22.954
  • But i'm like, no, because i was right.
  • 00:37:22.954 --> 00:37:25.390
  • I know i'm right.
  • 00:37:25.390 --> 00:37:26.725
  • I know, whatever.
  • 00:37:26.725 --> 00:37:28.694
  • And the lord confronted me beautifully.
  • 00:37:28.694 --> 00:37:32.397
  • And i was like, right, you're on my side.
  • 00:37:32.397 --> 00:37:34.700
  • I'm angry.
  • 00:37:34.700 --> 00:37:36.168
  • I was right.
  • 00:37:36.168 --> 00:37:36.835
  • I know i was.
  • 00:37:36.835 --> 00:37:38.136
  • And he goes, oh, kalley, it's so good for you to be wrong.
  • 00:37:38.136 --> 00:37:42.607
  • It's so good when you're wrong.
  • 00:37:42.607 --> 00:37:45.644
  • And i'm like, excuse me.
  • 00:37:45.644 --> 00:37:48.313
  • Come again.
  • 00:37:48.313 --> 00:37:50.415
  • What are we talking about?
  • 00:37:50.415 --> 00:37:53.418
  • And i just began to realize, oh,
  • 00:37:53.418 --> 00:37:55.387
  • When i'm right in my own eyes, when i always come up as the
  • 00:37:55.387 --> 00:37:58.757
  • Right one, when i always come up as the correct one,
  • 00:37:58.757 --> 00:38:01.259
  • I'm always the vindicated one.
  • 00:38:01.259 --> 00:38:04.796
  • I've missed something here.
  • 00:38:04.796 --> 00:38:06.531
  • It's falling on my performance.
  • 00:38:06.531 --> 00:38:07.866
  • It's falling on what i do.
  • 00:38:07.866 --> 00:38:10.035
  • And i don't have an accurate picture of myself.
  • 00:38:10.035 --> 00:38:12.771
  • And i'll never extend mercy to anybody else because i think
  • 00:38:12.771 --> 00:38:15.607
  • That i am above it, or i'm always right.
  • 00:38:15.607 --> 00:38:18.910
  • I worked around this.
  • 00:38:18.910 --> 00:38:20.479
  • It's so good for us to be humbled in the sight of the
  • 00:38:20.479 --> 00:38:23.315
  • Lord to receive his mercy.
  • 00:38:23.315 --> 00:38:25.817
  • He's rich in mercy, full of love and kindness.
  • 00:38:25.817 --> 00:38:29.154
  • - i love that.
  • 00:38:29.154 --> 00:38:30.422
  • - where am i going to give it to anybody else if i'm not
  • 00:38:30.422 --> 00:38:32.023
  • Receiving it from him?
  • 00:38:32.023 --> 00:38:33.792
  • And so, i think it's even at, oh god,
  • 00:38:33.792 --> 00:38:36.161
  • Show me where i'm getting short with people.
  • 00:38:36.161 --> 00:38:39.364
  • Show me where i'm judgmental of others because i probably
  • 00:38:39.364 --> 00:38:42.801
  • Am long overdue to come before you and say, hey,
  • 00:38:42.801 --> 00:38:47.339
  • Where am i wrong?
  • 00:38:47.339 --> 00:38:48.707
  • And i need a fresh dose of your mercy.
  • 00:38:48.707 --> 00:38:51.710
  • I need to recognize the forgiveness that you are
  • 00:38:51.710 --> 00:38:54.146
  • Extending to me so that i can give it to the world around
  • 00:38:54.146 --> 00:38:57.048
  • Me.
  • 00:38:57.048 --> 00:38:58.383
  • - grace is something that we often, in our human nature,
  • 00:38:58.383 --> 00:39:02.454
  • Run out of.
  • 00:39:02.454 --> 00:39:03.688
  • We can get impatient with people.
  • 00:39:03.688 --> 00:39:05.123
  • We can get angry if people cut us off in traffic,
  • 00:39:05.123 --> 00:39:09.494
  • And we can get stingy with grace, but not god.
  • 00:39:09.494 --> 00:39:12.931
  • He never runs out of grace.
  • 00:39:12.931 --> 00:39:16.067
  • He paid a price so that he can continually apply grace
  • 00:39:16.067 --> 00:39:20.405
  • Wherever it is that we need it.
  • 00:39:20.405 --> 00:39:23.041
  • And what i've found is when you operate in the practice of
  • 00:39:23.041 --> 00:39:27.212
  • Repentance, you repent, you return to the top where god
  • 00:39:27.212 --> 00:39:31.183
  • Has called you.
  • 00:39:31.183 --> 00:39:32.217
  • There's always a brand new pocket of grace.
  • 00:39:32.217 --> 00:39:35.454
  • It's like finding the mother load of gold in the mountain.
  • 00:39:35.454 --> 00:39:40.292
  • We encounter grace so that we can be more gracious and grace
  • 00:39:40.292 --> 00:39:45.864
  • Filled in our endeavors with other people,
  • 00:39:45.864 --> 00:39:50.602
  • Especially through relationships.
  • 00:39:50.602 --> 00:39:51.903
  • We should experience the grace of god through his mercy so
  • 00:39:51.903 --> 00:39:55.173
  • That we can give that, dispensate that to others who
  • 00:39:55.173 --> 00:39:58.743
  • Are in need.
  • 00:39:58.743 --> 00:40:00.545
  • - i think that's so easy to be in that place.
  • 00:40:00.645 --> 00:40:03.682
  • I think a lot of christians, they don't realize,
  • 00:40:03.682 --> 00:40:08.086
  • When you're saying like, oh, i'm always the vindicated one.
  • 00:40:08.086 --> 00:40:10.722
  • I think a lot of believers, when we read the bible,
  • 00:40:10.722 --> 00:40:14.326
  • They think i am apostle paul, i am moses, i am esther.
  • 00:40:14.326 --> 00:40:20.866
  • I am deborah.
  • 00:40:20.866 --> 00:40:22.267
  • And we relate with the protagonist,
  • 00:40:22.267 --> 00:40:25.203
  • With the bible all the time.
  • 00:40:25.203 --> 00:40:26.571
  • But you could be the pharisee too,
  • 00:40:26.571 --> 00:40:29.508
  • Or you could be like pharaoh.
  • 00:40:29.508 --> 00:40:31.676
  • And i think sometimes when we think, oh,
  • 00:40:31.676 --> 00:40:35.313
  • I'm always the victim, i'm always the one that needs to
  • 00:40:35.313 --> 00:40:38.950
  • Be loved and understood.
  • 00:40:38.950 --> 00:40:40.318
  • And you don't remember the last time god had changed your
  • 00:40:40.318 --> 00:40:43.421
  • Mind, then i think that's a good place to really check,
  • 00:40:43.421 --> 00:40:48.260
  • Okay, maybe i haven't been in a place where i'm inquiring of
  • 00:40:48.260 --> 00:40:52.998
  • The lord to show me his way.
  • 00:40:52.998 --> 00:40:54.699
  • Maybe i haven't been in a place where my posture has
  • 00:40:54.699 --> 00:40:58.003
  • Been searched me, god.
  • 00:40:58.003 --> 00:41:00.372
  • It's easy to forget that.
  • 00:41:00.372 --> 00:41:03.208
  • - and even just ask the question,
  • 00:41:03.208 --> 00:41:05.010
  • How could i do this better?
  • 00:41:05.010 --> 00:41:08.680
  • Because i know there's always room for improvement.
  • 00:41:06.278 --> 00:41:11.516
  • How could i make this relationship healthier?
  • 00:41:11.516 --> 00:41:15.053
  • What's my part?
  • 00:41:15.053 --> 00:41:16.821
  • Instead of looking at 50/50 in relationships,
  • 00:41:16.821 --> 00:41:18.990
  • I think god leads us as repentance in a lifestyle is i
  • 00:41:18.990 --> 00:41:23.962
  • Can do this better.
  • 00:41:23.962 --> 00:41:24.796
  • And it's not about performance,
  • 00:41:24.796 --> 00:41:25.997
  • It's about becoming more like jesus.
  • 00:41:25.997 --> 00:41:29.334
  • Like paul said, being all things to all people that i
  • 00:41:29.334 --> 00:41:33.672
  • Might win some.
  • 00:41:33.672 --> 00:41:34.973
  • And i think that we all have, i hope i'm still learning a
  • 00:41:34.973 --> 00:41:39.210
  • Lesson.
  • 00:41:39.210 --> 00:41:40.445
  • The last day i take a breath going, okay.
  • 00:41:40.445 --> 00:41:43.214
  • I was correctable, and i did that.
  • 00:41:43.214 --> 00:41:45.183
  • I received that.
  • 00:41:45.183 --> 00:41:46.651
  • And i think from david and from all of us is we get an
  • 00:41:46.651 --> 00:41:51.623
  • Opportunity when we're corrected to see how we
  • 00:41:51.623 --> 00:41:55.727
  • Respond.
  • 00:41:55.727 --> 00:41:57.495
  • It really tells, is our heart soft?
  • 00:41:57.495 --> 00:42:00.632
  • Are we set in our ways?
  • 00:42:00.632 --> 00:42:02.233
  • And i think that's an important lesson he gives us,
  • 00:42:02.233 --> 00:42:05.270
  • Is he responded immediately, god forgive me,
  • 00:42:05.270 --> 00:42:09.174
  • When he saw his reflection.
  • 00:42:09.174 --> 00:42:10.742
  • His relationship and his legacy now is one that we can
  • 00:42:10.742 --> 00:42:15.847
  • Learn from, from mistakes.
  • 00:42:15.847 --> 00:42:18.216
  • I don't want to learn from people who do it all right
  • 00:42:18.216 --> 00:42:21.353
  • Because i am not that person.
  • 00:42:21.353 --> 00:42:23.021
  • So, i can't learn from someone who's perfect.
  • 00:42:23.021 --> 00:42:27.158
  • I think that's what i even love about jesus is that he
  • 00:42:27.158 --> 00:42:30.996
  • Was tempted in ways we are tempted,
  • 00:42:30.996 --> 00:42:33.999
  • And he struggled with relationships,
  • 00:42:33.999 --> 00:42:36.668
  • And he was angry.
  • 00:42:36.668 --> 00:42:38.603
  • He didn't sin, but he shows us how to be angry,
  • 00:42:38.603 --> 00:42:41.840
  • What righteous indignation looks like,
  • 00:42:41.840 --> 00:42:43.842
  • And what forgiveness from betrayal looks like.
  • 00:42:43.842 --> 00:42:47.278
  • And i think we have a lot of repenting to do,
  • 00:42:47.278 --> 00:42:51.950
  • To keep relationships whole, even with our own children.
  • 00:42:51.950 --> 00:42:55.487
  • I know that was something my parents really modeled with
  • 00:42:55.487 --> 00:42:57.889
  • Me, and i'm so grateful they did.
  • 00:42:57.889 --> 00:43:00.025
  • A lot of parents think, you don't ever have to tell your
  • 00:43:00.025 --> 00:43:02.293
  • Children you're sorry.
  • 00:43:02.293 --> 00:43:03.495
  • Well, that's the greatest lesson you can give them,
  • 00:43:03.495 --> 00:43:06.564
  • Is if you're wrong, tell them i was wrong.
  • 00:43:06.564 --> 00:43:09.467
  • And it opens them and softens their heart to recognize,
  • 00:43:09.467 --> 00:43:13.505
  • That's okay.
  • 00:43:13.505 --> 00:43:14.673
  • It doesn't matter what level you get in life,
  • 00:43:14.673 --> 00:43:16.841
  • You can still make a mistake and you can move on from that.
  • 00:43:16.841 --> 00:43:20.712
  • Not get stuck in it, stuck in shame.
  • 00:43:20.712 --> 00:43:23.848
  • - david's prayer was, have mercy on me, o god.
  • 00:43:23.948 --> 00:43:26.685
  • James boyce defines mercy as god's loving assistance to the
  • 00:43:26.685 --> 00:43:33.058
  • Pitiful.
  • 00:43:33.058 --> 00:43:34.325
  • And how many times have we just needed god's mercy in our
  • 00:43:34.325 --> 00:43:38.296
  • Lives?
  • 00:43:38.296 --> 00:43:39.030
  • We've screwed it up so bad.
  • 00:43:39.030 --> 00:43:40.031
  • David did something really, really bad.
  • 00:43:40.031 --> 00:43:42.767
  • And then, he killed uriah.
  • 00:43:42.767 --> 00:43:47.605
  • Had him killed and there was just nothing else he could do
  • 00:43:47.605 --> 00:43:51.342
  • Except cry out for god's mercy.
  • 00:43:51.342 --> 00:43:56.681
  • When i get judgmental towards people,
  • 00:43:56.681 --> 00:43:59.150
  • When i have a bad attitude, usually my first prayer is,
  • 00:43:59.150 --> 00:44:05.123
  • God created me a clean heart.
  • 00:44:05.123 --> 00:44:07.726
  • I think if we can just keep our own hearts right before
  • 00:44:07.726 --> 00:44:11.162
  • The lord, that would change the world.
  • 00:44:11.162 --> 00:44:13.298
  • - absolutely.
  • 00:44:13.298 --> 00:44:14.599
  • - that would change the world if we just were conscious
  • 00:44:14.599 --> 00:44:17.202
  • About what we did and be quicker to repent and to be
  • 00:44:17.202 --> 00:44:23.708
  • Introspective and clean before god.
  • 00:44:23.708 --> 00:44:30.515
  • - when it talks in scripture about god,
  • 00:44:30.515 --> 00:44:31.783
  • Because i'm thinking it about people who think, well,
  • 00:44:31.783 --> 00:44:33.251
  • I've blown it over and over and over again when have i
  • 00:44:33.251 --> 00:44:35.120
  • Used up all my tickets.
  • 00:44:35.120 --> 00:44:37.522
  • But when it talks about god removing our sin as far as the
  • 00:44:37.522 --> 00:44:41.059
  • East is from the west.
  • 00:44:41.059 --> 00:44:43.061
  • Christian had a globe when he was in high school.
  • 00:44:43.061 --> 00:44:46.765
  • And i remember looking at it and think,
  • 00:44:46.765 --> 00:44:48.733
  • If you start going east, you're always going east.
  • 00:44:48.733 --> 00:44:54.806
  • If you start going north, then you go south.
  • 00:44:54.806 --> 00:44:58.009
  • But as far as the east is to the west, it's infinity.
  • 00:44:58.009 --> 00:45:01.246
  • You never stop going east.
  • 00:45:01.246 --> 00:45:02.781
  • And that's the way god is.
  • 00:45:02.781 --> 00:45:04.215
  • One of the joys of repentance is that he remembers it no
  • 00:45:04.215 --> 00:45:07.619
  • More.
  • 00:45:07.619 --> 00:45:08.286
  • It's gone.
  • 00:45:08.286 --> 00:45:09.854
  • God's forgiveness is one of the great mysteries.
  • 00:45:09.854 --> 00:45:12.557
  • I don't think we'll probably truly understand until we're
  • 00:45:12.557 --> 00:45:15.326
  • Finally home with him.
  • 00:45:15.326 --> 00:45:16.961
  • But i know the moment, literally the moment that i
  • 00:45:16.961 --> 00:45:20.598
  • Ask for forgiveness, i'm forgiven.
  • 00:45:20.598 --> 00:45:23.234
  • And that's what scripture tells us.
  • 00:45:23.234 --> 00:45:25.036
  • He remembers it no more.
  • 00:45:25.036 --> 00:45:26.971
  • That doesn't mean that god has a bad memory,
  • 00:45:26.971 --> 00:45:28.873
  • But it simply means that when jesus died on the cross,
  • 00:45:28.873 --> 00:45:32.610
  • He was saying, father, punish me now for everything that
  • 00:45:32.610 --> 00:45:37.816
  • Sheila walsh will ever do, for every mistake she'll make,
  • 00:45:37.816 --> 00:45:40.952
  • For every bad choice she'll make, punish me.
  • 00:45:40.952 --> 00:45:43.621
  • So, when i confess my sins and god looks down at me,
  • 00:45:43.621 --> 00:45:46.991
  • He sees jesus, and the sin, it's gone.
  • 00:45:46.991 --> 00:45:51.496
  • - we have to learn to practice repentance because we have to
  • 00:45:51.496 --> 00:45:54.699
  • Repent for judging other people or holding offence
  • 00:45:54.699 --> 00:45:59.404
  • Against ignorance, because there are so many people that
  • 00:45:59.404 --> 00:46:01.773
  • Say ignorant things.
  • 00:46:01.773 --> 00:46:03.074
  • They don't know our culture, or they don't know-- whatever
  • 00:46:03.074 --> 00:46:05.844
  • It is, they don't know.
  • 00:46:05.844 --> 00:46:07.612
  • And they have comments about things we have to repent about
  • 00:46:07.612 --> 00:46:11.416
  • Things about people we don't even know.
  • 00:46:11.416 --> 00:46:14.352
  • And it really could burden us so much if we don't recognize,
  • 00:46:14.352 --> 00:46:19.858
  • Hey, i'm hanging onto this holding account,
  • 00:46:19.858 --> 00:46:23.061
  • Waiting for god to fix something.
  • 00:46:23.061 --> 00:46:25.063
  • I don't want to be stuck there.
  • 00:46:25.063 --> 00:46:26.865
  • I want to move on.
  • 00:46:26.865 --> 00:46:27.999
  • I want to return to the best that god has for me.
  • 00:46:27.999 --> 00:46:31.069
  • And i'm always learning.
  • 00:46:31.069 --> 00:46:32.570
  • God, how can i repent?
  • 00:46:32.570 --> 00:46:34.005
  • My husband always say all the time,
  • 00:46:34.005 --> 00:46:35.740
  • You never have to say you're sorry.
  • 00:46:35.740 --> 00:46:37.642
  • He is like, because i don't say things i don't mean.
  • 00:46:37.642 --> 00:46:41.512
  • To me, i have to say i'm sorry all the time,
  • 00:46:41.512 --> 00:46:44.015
  • But it's because i'm the one that reacts instead of
  • 00:46:44.015 --> 00:46:46.818
  • Responding.
  • 00:46:46.818 --> 00:46:49.520
  • My prayer is restore a steadfast heart to me.
  • 00:46:49.520 --> 00:46:55.059
  • Renew a loyal spirit to where i stay at the top longer.
  • 00:46:55.059 --> 00:46:59.197
  • And i think for people that are watching today that maybe
  • 00:46:59.197 --> 00:47:04.235
  • Have not really understood what repentance means or what
  • 00:47:04.235 --> 00:47:07.872
  • It looks like in everyday life.
  • 00:47:07.872 --> 00:47:09.674
  • I think just encouraging them today,
  • 00:47:09.674 --> 00:47:12.377
  • If there's anything anybody wants to say,
  • 00:47:12.377 --> 00:47:14.379
  • To just encourage them to make it a practice,
  • 00:47:14.379 --> 00:47:17.015
  • Maybe try it first.
  • 00:47:17.015 --> 00:47:18.650
  • Ask the lord, show me where i have failed,
  • 00:47:18.650 --> 00:47:23.421
  • Or i've let you down, or i've fallen short.
  • 00:47:23.421 --> 00:47:26.190
  • Not because god will shame you, because he won't.
  • 00:47:26.190 --> 00:47:28.626
  • In fact, if you're a seeker of the will of god,
  • 00:47:28.626 --> 00:47:31.129
  • You're leaning in, you're coming toward him.
  • 00:47:31.129 --> 00:47:33.932
  • Because in the garden, what we recognize is god still showed
  • 00:47:33.932 --> 00:47:38.603
  • Up for the appointment even when they didn't.
  • 00:47:38.603 --> 00:47:41.706
  • God still showed up.
  • 00:47:41.706 --> 00:47:43.308
  • That's the nature of god, is your sin doesn't separate you
  • 00:47:43.308 --> 00:47:46.945
  • Because he removes himself.
  • 00:47:46.945 --> 00:47:48.813
  • It's because we step away from intimacy.
  • 00:47:48.813 --> 00:47:51.649
  • So, today, i just want to pray over people who are listening
  • 00:47:51.649 --> 00:47:56.087
  • That are wondering, what's my next?
  • 00:47:56.087 --> 00:48:00.858
  • And what the conviction, not the condemnation,
  • 00:48:00.858 --> 00:48:03.761
  • But what the conviction of the holy spirit compels in us.
  • 00:48:03.761 --> 00:48:08.366
  • It speaks to the higher level of who we are.
  • 00:48:08.366 --> 00:48:11.836
  • So, as we pray today, i just want to cover those who are
  • 00:48:11.836 --> 00:48:15.073
  • Watching and ask the holy spirit to surround them today,
  • 00:48:15.073 --> 00:48:20.078
  • That his voice would be this whisper.
  • 00:48:20.078 --> 00:48:22.480
  • So, lord, we just thank you.
  • 00:48:22.480 --> 00:48:24.782
  • Mighty god, beautiful savior, comforter is one of the names
  • 00:48:24.782 --> 00:48:30.521
  • For you.
  • 00:48:30.521 --> 00:48:31.823
  • We ask that you wrap yourself around every person watching
  • 00:48:31.823 --> 00:48:35.093
  • Today, that you remind them of their higher calling,
  • 00:48:35.093 --> 00:48:40.431
  • What you've created them for.
  • 00:48:40.431 --> 00:48:43.601
  • Your word says that eye has not seen, ear has not heard,
  • 00:48:43.601 --> 00:48:46.971
  • Neither the heart of man has imagined what you have
  • 00:48:46.971 --> 00:48:50.241
  • Prepared for those who love you.
  • 00:48:50.241 --> 00:48:52.744
  • So, god, i thank you today that you are just giving a
  • 00:48:52.744 --> 00:48:56.014
  • Deposit to each individual of the provision and vision and
  • 00:48:56.014 --> 00:49:00.718
  • Grace and mercy that's available to those who repent
  • 00:49:00.718 --> 00:49:06.657
  • To return to you and call upon your name.
  • 00:49:06.657 --> 00:49:09.761
  • In whatever situation they're in today, god,
  • 00:49:09.761 --> 00:49:11.896
  • We know that you're going to be faithful to show up like
  • 00:49:11.896 --> 00:49:14.265
  • You did in the garden and say, where are you?
  • 00:49:14.265 --> 00:49:18.069
  • Wherever you are, i want to be there.
  • 00:49:18.069 --> 00:49:19.771
  • And lord, we know that your presence is with each
  • 00:49:19.771 --> 00:49:22.407
  • Individual right now.
  • 00:49:22.407 --> 00:49:23.841
  • Compel us toward our next step.
  • 00:49:23.841 --> 00:49:26.944
  • Whatever it is we need to do to make ourself available,
  • 00:49:26.944 --> 00:49:30.348
  • To repent, to call a friend like sheila did.
  • 00:49:30.348 --> 00:49:34.852
  • Lord, we thank you that you're going to speak to us what that
  • 00:49:34.852 --> 00:49:37.588
  • Next step is.
  • 00:49:37.588 --> 00:49:38.856
  • And on the other side of that is more mercy, more grace,
  • 00:49:38.856 --> 00:49:43.061
  • More vision, more joy.
  • 00:49:43.061 --> 00:49:46.731
  • We thank you for it today in jesus name, amen.
  • 00:49:46.731 --> 00:49:49.667
  • - amen.
  • 00:49:49.667 --> 00:49:51.069
  • - connect with us on social media and let us know how our
  • 00:49:52.303 --> 00:49:54.272
  • Team can pray for you.
  • 00:49:54.272 --> 00:49:56.974
  • - if you feel too broken or unworthy to receive god's
  • 00:49:58.109 --> 00:50:01.279
  • Grace, i have great news.
  • 00:50:01.279 --> 00:50:03.347
  • It is the grace of god, the extent to which he is good.
  • 00:50:03.347 --> 00:50:08.319
  • It is the fullness of this redemption that he's offered
  • 00:50:08.319 --> 00:50:11.689
  • That covers us.
  • 00:50:11.689 --> 00:50:12.990
  • It never had anything to do with our competence,
  • 00:50:12.990 --> 00:50:16.994
  • Our ability to do the right thing.
  • 00:50:16.994 --> 00:50:19.230
  • It has nothing to do with you.
  • 00:50:19.230 --> 00:50:21.732
  • It has nothing to do with me.
  • 00:50:21.732 --> 00:50:23.301
  • It is by the mercy of god.
  • 00:50:23.301 --> 00:50:25.369
  • And it covers all of it.
  • 00:50:25.369 --> 00:50:27.638
  • It covers every single bit of us so we can never boast in it
  • 00:50:27.638 --> 00:50:31.409
  • On our own.
  • 00:50:31.409 --> 00:50:32.677
  • So, if you feel like you don't have what it takes,
  • 00:50:32.677 --> 00:50:34.045
  • You're in really good company.
  • 00:50:34.045 --> 00:50:35.947
  • None of us do.
  • 00:50:35.947 --> 00:50:37.615
  • - join our conversations anytime, anywhere.
  • 00:50:38.549 --> 00:50:41.052
  • Download tbn+ to stream your favorite episodes.
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