Better Together

See Yourself Through God's Eyes | Better Together Episode 1173

June 17, 2026 | S8 E1173 | 50:59

You are fearfully and wonderfully made! God has numbered every hair on your head. If you struggle with caring for your body or negative self-talk, there is healing and freedom in the arms of your Creator Redeemer. Let's speak God's truth to every lie. | TBN Prayer Line: 714-731-1000

#IdentityinChrist #Love #Healing #Confidence #Encouragement #Anorexia #SelfImage #Truth #Insecurity #Diet #Fear #Failure #Eatingdisorder #PersonalStory #WordofGod #Women #Generations #Culture #Wordswespeak #LaurieCrouch #SheilaWalsh #DonnaPisani #BlyndaLane

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Better Together | See Yourself Through God's Eyes | Better Together Episode 1173 | June 17, 2026

Laurie crouch: when you look in the mirror, you are looking at
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God's beloved child.
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In his presence, self-criticism, negative labels, and all those
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Insecurities just melt away.
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It's time for us to speak life over ourselves, our mind, our
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Soul, and our bodies.
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Come on, join us.
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[music]
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Sheila walsh: one of the things i'm so grateful to you for,
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Laurie, is that you've provided this place where women who love
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Jesus get to sit here and tell the truth.
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Laurie: no, i'm so glad you all have come.
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Sheila: i mean, everywhere i travel, i hear from people,
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"'better together' has impacted my life," but one of the
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Questions we're looking at today, and when i saw that in
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This conversation i was like, oh, is seeing yourself through
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God's eyes, and have you ever had difficulty loving yourself?
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When i was growing up, i had really bad skin which i was very
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Self-aware of, plus i was a bit chunky.
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In scotland it's very windy, so we eat for ballast, you know,
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It's kind of like.
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I was not an attractive teenager at all.
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The only thing i had going for me was i had--
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Blynda lane: you were peaking at the right time.
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Sheila: i had long jet black shiny hair.
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That's my natural color.
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I no longer have a natural color, that's what my
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Hairstylist told me.
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You no longer have a natural color, but it was like blue,
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Black, and shiny and long.
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And then i'm about to go off to seminary, i'm 19, i'm leaving a
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Little fishing town in scotland, i'm going to london to seminary,
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And somehow the week before i leave, i pick up this magazine.
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I don't even know what it was, probably "vogue" or something,
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And it showed this person in london who had this beautiful
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Perm, but it was not--it was just like wavy, and it looked so
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Glamorous, and i thought i'm gonna do that.
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Blynda: i gotta get that.
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Sheila: so, i took this picture to this woman in this little
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Beauty shop in our fishing town.
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Jenni wong clayville: oh.
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Sheila: oh yeah, yeah, oh.
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Blynda: i can smell the perm solvents from here.
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Sheila: and i showed her the picture, and i said, "do you
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Think you can do this?"
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And she was like, "oh, aye, oh yeah, i can do that, you'll
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Be lovely."
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And she didn't have a mirror in front of me, so i couldn't
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Really see what she was doing.
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I just noticed how much she was cutting off and the stink of the
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Perm solution, and when i looked at myself in the mirror, it
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Looked like a dog had chewed my hair but then got fed up halfway
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Through and given up.
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I was meeting my mum and my brother in town for coffee
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Afterwards, and i think my mum had a sense that all was not
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Gonna go well, because she said to my brother, "listen, when we
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See sheila, no matter what it looks like, do not laugh."
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So i'm coming out of the salon, and i'm thinking maybe it's not
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Quite as bad as i think, maybe it's not quite as bad.
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And i'm around the corner, and there's my mum and my brother,
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And my brother is literally holding on to a pole.
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He can't stop--he's literally.
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Blynda: i mean, it's a lot to ask the brother.
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It's a lot to ask the brother not to laugh.
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Sheila: it is, because it was just awful, and i couldn't even
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Get a comb through it.
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I mean, it was so.
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So, before i even go to seminary, i have to get most of
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It cut off.
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So i already look like a wee boy.
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So, in seminary, there's a guy that the whole first year i just
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Stared at him in chapel.
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I never looked at jesus, i just looked at him.
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He was just the most handsome boy, and the second year, he
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Invited me out, and i thought, you know what?
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My picture of myself must be wrong, because this guy is like
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One of the most handsome guys, and yet he's really interested
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In me.
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And so i started to feel a little bit better about myself.
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And then one morning i had borrowed one of his textbooks,
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And before my first class i took it down to his dorm room to give
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Him his textbook back, and i knocked on his door, and he
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Opened it, and the sun was shining through his window and
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Hitting me in the face, and i'll never forget.
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I can still hear him, he said, "gosh, i must really love you,
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Because you look terrible right now."
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And i gave him his book, and i went back.
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I missed my class.
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I went back to my room, and i sat in my bed, and i just wept,
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Because i thought, you know what?
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Everything i thought about myself is right.
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I am a little too plump, my hair is a disaster, and my skin
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Is awful.
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It was probably like 2 weeks, i was just struggling and ashamed.
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And even when we would go to the dining hall, i would choose the
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Darkest corner.
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If we were going to restaurants outside, you know, with a bunch
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Of my friends, i would always choose a dark corner.
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If they wanted to go to a place where they were sitting outside
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At tables, i had some reason for why i couldn't go.
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And then i remember a friend of mine copying out in her
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Calligraphy, beautiful handcraft, parts of psalm 139,
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And slipping under my door.
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And it was, "i praise you because i'm fearfully and
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Wonderfully made.
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Your works are wonderful.
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I know that full well."
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And the one of the things she underlined was the way the
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Hebrew's written here is it's put so much emphasis on god.
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I praise you, because i'm fearfully and wonderfully made,
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Because your works are wonderful.
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And i suddenly got to think, you know, i'm not--i mean, i would
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Look in the mirror and think i'm not how i wish i looked, but
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Having said that, god's word says i'm fearfully and
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Wonderfully made, and it suddenly began, and it wasn't
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Overnight, you know, it took time.
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I had to work through it, my hair grew a wee bit, you know,
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My skin cleared up a bit.
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Laurie: it might be every morning.
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Sheila: yeah, it could be every morning, but it's just coming to
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This place where you think, you know what?
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I might not really appreciate this, but you made me, and you
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Love me, and you see me exactly as i am right now.
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Donna pisani: i think we have to repeat to ourselves over and
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Over again that we were made in god's image.
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Now go back to the first garden with adam and eve, and the
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Temptation or the question that the enemy brought to them is did
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God say you can't eat from that fruit?
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And the intention of that question was to make them
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Question their identity.
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He was trying to make them believe that god was holding
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Something back from them, that if they ate from this one tree,
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Then they would be more than enough, and they forgot that
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They'd been made in the image of god.
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And yet we find that when they eat from that fruit and then
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They're hiding in shame, the one time that we hear god speak, the
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First time we hear god speak, god says to them, "where
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Are you?"
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And in hebrew, that's not just like a positional where are you?
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He lost them.
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That is god saying his heart was longing for them.
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He was reaching out to them like a father.
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He hadn't lost them, he knew right where they were, but he's
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Like, "why have you turned away from me?"
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And so i love that in this whole thing where the enemy tries to
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Steal your identity, god again reminds adam and eve and reminds
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Us that even when shame comes in or lies come in and try to tell
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You something else, god is always standing there saying,
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"come back to me.
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I'm the source of your identity.
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I'm the source.
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You're gonna find out who you really are, who i know you to
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Be, who i created you to be."
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The only source for that is him and learning to lean into the
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Embrace he already has on your life.
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Sheila: i remember when i went to work at "the 700 club," one
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Of the girls said to me, "can i talk to you about something?"
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And i was like, "yeah, of course."
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She said, "i'm about 50 pounds overweight, and i'm in my
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Forties, and i'm not married, and i really think it's because
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Of how i look.
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Would you help me?"
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And i said to her, "well, a, i think you look great, but b,
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Yeah, i'll be glad to work with you."
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So we joined some club, and we both went on the same kind of
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Diet, and we exercised and did everything, and i'll never
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Forget the day when she at the meeting, got her gold star for
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Reaching her goal, and two weeks later saying to me, "okay, so
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Now what's the reason?
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Blynda: aww.
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Sheila: now i'm the weight i needed to be,
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Now i'm this i needed to be.
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So what is wrong with me now?"
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And i thought how much of our lives as women do we spend
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Thinking we don't look like her, we don't look like her, and if
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This was different, and how that impacts the way we're able to
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Receive god's love.
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Because i feel like for so much of my life, my fists were
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Clenched, and it's been this beautiful work of the holy
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Spirit to unclench my hands and to--my neighbors will tell
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You this.
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I walk outside my house every morning with my wee dog, maggie,
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Who is barking at everybody, and i always raise my--because it's
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Like first thing in the morning i'm like thank you that you
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Love me.
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On the days when i feel like it makes sense and the days when
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It doesn't.
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So i just wondered, i'd love to hear all your perspectives of
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Like body image or how you felt about yourself or how god's
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Helped you with any of that stuff.
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Laurie: you know, i think about the ten spies that went in to
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Check out the land for moses.
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They go in there, they're spies, they said, "there we saw the
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Giants, and we were like grasshoppers in our own eyes,
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Our own sight, and so we were in their sight."
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Well, how did they know?
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They were spies.
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Did they go and ask them, "hey, how do you see us?"
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When the truth was they were terrified, right?
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They were terrified of the israelites, of their god,
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Because they knew how great their god was, but yet that was
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Their own opinion that they saw themselves like that, and of
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Course they do too.
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Sheila: yeah.
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Laurie: you know, and so we assume people think, first of
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All, that much about us, right?
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And we care so much when god has said over our lives, "i know
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You, i love you, i called you, i've purposed you."
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I've all the things from god, but we've let people put some
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Kind of a label on us, and we give that credence.
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We put faith in that, we put our whole identity in what someone
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Says, and that is so easy to do.
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I mean, here at tbn, i remember when i first came, i was kind of
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Like blynda, well, i love everybody, everybody loves me.
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Well, no, they don't.
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Finally i was kind of taught, look, a third of the people
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Probably love you, a third of the people can't stand you, and
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A third of the people don't care.
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And so i started kind of just living by that and thinking,
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Well, i need just to still love everybody, you know?
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But that's true, and so people can be so--and you can read so
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Many beautiful things that people say, and then you can get
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That one--
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Sheila: oh, i know.
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Laurie: and it just torments you, and what is that?
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It's that we care when we shouldn't.
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We have to change our perceptions, we have to change
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Our hearts, we have to get close, because god's presence in
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Our lives changes all that.
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Now you don't care.
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I love people, i don't care what you do, i'm gonna love you,
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You know?
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And so that changes us on the inside, but it changes our whole
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Mental thing about how we see everybody in our life.
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Laurie: you know, i think if we feed off of what we think
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Significance is maybe like applause of man or the stage we
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Stand on, that is a slippery slope, and that is a very
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Unstable foundation.
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Your identity should be found in christ, because everything in
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This world can be shaken, everything that comes our way.
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You can be so tempted to believe that you're stable in this area,
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And there's a time that that can just come right out from
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Under you.
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That's why it doesn't matter what man says about you, it
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Matters what god says about you, and so that's what we need
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To do.
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We need to stand on his word that we are children of god,
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That he is called, and he's chosen us, that nothing can
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Separate me from the love of god, not sickness, not death,
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Not angels, not anything.
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Read in romans where--romans 8, where he talks about it, nothing
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Can separate us from the love of god.
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Blynda: and laurie, it's important to go back to that
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Story and to remember, you know, joshua and caleb were the ones
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That came back, and they were like it's great, we're gonna be
00:13:07.066 --> 00:13:10.970
Great, god's got it, but it's important to remember that god
00:13:10.970 --> 00:13:15.241
Basically said this whole generation of of people who
00:13:15.241 --> 00:13:18.143
Don't believe, you're not going to see the promised land.
00:13:18.143 --> 00:13:20.546
Laurie: you're not going in.
00:13:20.546 --> 00:13:21.881
Blynda: meaning not understanding this truth has
00:13:21.881 --> 00:13:24.250
Ramifications for us.
00:13:24.250 --> 00:13:26.485
You know, not understanding for generations, not understanding
00:13:26.485 --> 00:13:30.789
How important the truth of understanding who god is and who
00:13:30.789 --> 00:13:34.760
We are to him really can-- because if we might see
00:13:34.760 --> 00:13:38.564
Something so opposite of how god wants us to see it that we make
00:13:38.564 --> 00:13:41.834
A choice that misses god.
00:13:41.834 --> 00:13:43.502
Now, i do believe that god, he's sovereign, and i do believe
00:13:43.502 --> 00:13:47.273
Because we operate from victory, but i do think, i mean, there's
00:13:47.273 --> 00:13:51.010
An example there.
00:13:51.010 --> 00:13:52.378
There's ramifications for not believing the truth.
00:13:52.378 --> 00:13:55.214
Laurie: that's right, yeah, absolutely.
00:13:55.214 --> 00:13:56.649
Donna: yeah, and you don't get to live the fullness.
00:13:56.649 --> 00:13:59.451
It's almost like there's this warehouse right here full of so
00:13:59.451 --> 00:14:03.122
Much goodness from god, and we're over here trying to be
00:14:03.122 --> 00:14:05.891
Somebody else.
00:14:05.891 --> 00:14:07.259
Well, god can't bless who you pretend to be.
00:14:07.259 --> 00:14:09.261
[music]
00:14:09.261 --> 00:14:14.900
Donna: when we realize that god designed, created us uniquely as
00:14:14.900 --> 00:14:19.138
His masterpiece, it helps us to look at even the imperfections a
00:14:19.138 --> 00:14:24.076
Little bit differently.
00:14:24.076 --> 00:14:25.411
In fact, i for so many years only saw my imperfections and
00:14:25.411 --> 00:14:29.648
Forgot that i'd been made in the image of god, and to be honest
00:14:29.648 --> 00:14:32.351
With you, it allowed insecurity and fear to run rampant in
00:14:32.351 --> 00:14:35.955
My life.
00:14:35.955 --> 00:14:37.323
But when you can remember that god created you uniquely and
00:14:37.323 --> 00:14:41.327
Specifically to be who you are, even the imperfections are part
00:14:41.327 --> 00:14:45.331
Of the gifts that he uses, so don't let the imperfections
00:14:45.331 --> 00:14:48.534
Stop you.
00:14:48.534 --> 00:14:49.868
You have a god who loves you too much to leave you right where
00:14:49.868 --> 00:14:52.104
You are.
00:14:52.104 --> 00:14:53.472
He's gonna continue on the journey perfecting what he's
00:14:53.472 --> 00:14:56.008
Already placed in your life.
00:14:56.008 --> 00:14:58.877
Laurie: our "better together" community is built on love and
00:14:58.877 --> 00:15:01.513
Friendship, and we want you to join us.
00:15:01.513 --> 00:15:03.415
Sheila: follow us on social media to make friends with women
00:15:03.415 --> 00:15:06.085
All over the world.
00:15:06.085 --> 00:15:08.654
Female announcer: let's keep the conversation going.
00:15:08.654 --> 00:15:10.856
You can find the "better together" podcast on your
00:15:10.856 --> 00:15:13.192
Favorite listening platform.
00:15:13.192 --> 00:15:15.027
Subscribe today.
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00:15:18.998 --> 00:15:20.066
[music]
00:15:20.400 --> 00:15:24.838
Blynda: i think comparison steals our uniqueness, because
00:15:24.838 --> 00:15:27.741
Comparison is going to do one of two things.
00:15:27.741 --> 00:15:30.810
Comparison is going to make you feel inferior, or it's going to
00:15:30.810 --> 00:15:34.414
Make you feel superior, and both of those are distractions, both
00:15:34.414 --> 00:15:37.917
Of those are not good, because where we want to land is in who
00:15:37.917 --> 00:15:41.421
God made us and the security of knowing that the way he's made
00:15:41.421 --> 00:15:45.158
Us is for great purpose.
00:15:45.158 --> 00:15:47.260
And so if we're comparing, it's putting us either above someone
00:15:47.260 --> 00:15:50.230
Or below someone, and neither are are good.
00:15:50.230 --> 00:15:52.665
So i would just encourage you that if you feel comparison
00:15:52.665 --> 00:15:56.002
Coming on, it's a thief.
00:15:56.002 --> 00:15:57.370
Comparison is the thief of joy, and we wanna live a
00:15:57.370 --> 00:16:00.240
Joy-filled life.
00:16:00.240 --> 00:16:01.608
So if we feel comparison coming on, take a moment to say i want
00:16:01.608 --> 00:16:05.412
To sit rightly in who i am and let the scripture wash over you
00:16:05.412 --> 00:16:10.483
With how god sees you.
00:16:10.483 --> 00:16:12.185
But comparison will never get you where god wants to take you.
00:16:12.185 --> 00:16:15.688
[music]
00:16:16.923 --> 00:16:20.193
Donna: well, i was thinking about when i was in high school,
00:16:20.193 --> 00:16:22.429
I remember all the girls that i thought were popular and the
00:16:22.429 --> 00:16:25.965
Cheerleaders, all that, they all had blonde hair.
00:16:25.965 --> 00:16:28.468
So, back then you could do this thing called--i think it was
00:16:28.468 --> 00:16:31.304
Called sun in.
00:16:31.304 --> 00:16:33.506
Jenni: that did not turn anything here blonde, just
00:16:33.506 --> 00:16:36.109
Orange fire.
00:16:36.109 --> 00:16:37.477
Donna: right?
00:16:37.477 --> 00:16:38.812
So i asked--
00:16:38.812 --> 00:16:40.180
Blynda: and a lot of dead ends.
00:16:40.180 --> 00:16:41.514
Donna: yes, i had asked my parents if i could do my hair,
00:16:41.514 --> 00:16:43.249
And my dad, you know, very staunch sicilian man said, "no
00:16:43.249 --> 00:16:46.152
Way, you're not going to do that."
00:16:46.152 --> 00:16:47.754
So, in the--i very seldom did anything disobedient, but i was
00:16:47.754 --> 00:16:51.558
So desperate to be popular that i went and bought the kit
00:16:51.558 --> 00:16:54.828
Myself, and i went, and you had to pull it through.
00:16:54.828 --> 00:16:57.430
I think i got the thing you pulled through the cap, yeah,
00:16:57.430 --> 00:16:59.966
And then it was orange, and i somehow thought my parents
00:16:59.966 --> 00:17:03.536
Wouldn't notice i've done my hair.
00:17:03.536 --> 00:17:06.339
Laurie: they were fine.
00:17:06.339 --> 00:17:07.674
Jenni: how would they not notice?
00:17:07.674 --> 00:17:09.042
Donna: oh, i know.
00:17:09.042 --> 00:17:10.376
So we were sitting down to dinner, and i could tell my
00:17:10.376 --> 00:17:13.580
Parents--my father had lost-- i mean, he could go from 0 to
00:17:13.580 --> 00:17:17.684
3,000 in about 2 seconds, the italian temper just went off,
00:17:17.684 --> 00:17:21.054
And so he's like, "did you do anything to your hair?"
00:17:21.054 --> 00:17:23.623
And i said, "oh, did you notice?"
00:17:23.623 --> 00:17:26.993
And he said, "it's horrific."
00:17:26.993 --> 00:17:28.928
So, me trying to look better than hearing from a dad how
00:17:28.928 --> 00:17:33.633
Horrific i looked.
00:17:33.633 --> 00:17:35.001
And then i always felt like i was overweight, and i became
00:17:35.001 --> 00:17:37.604
Anorexic, because, you know, you eat, and then i would throw up,
00:17:37.604 --> 00:17:40.707
And this is all during high school and college.
00:17:40.707 --> 00:17:42.976
When i met jesus, the anorexia stopped, but the image
00:17:42.976 --> 00:17:46.146
Issues continued.
00:17:46.146 --> 00:17:47.547
And again, i think it was the comparison piece in the church.
00:17:47.547 --> 00:17:51.518
But honestly, i think it's so important that we recognize who
00:17:51.518 --> 00:17:56.422
God has created us to be and really work on building
00:17:56.422 --> 00:17:59.559
Our confidence.
00:17:59.559 --> 00:18:01.494
Sheila: i think as women, and you know what?
00:18:01.494 --> 00:18:04.864
I'm pretty sure it happens with men, too, that we struggle
00:18:04.864 --> 00:18:08.468
Sometimes with our own physical body.
00:18:08.468 --> 00:18:11.671
You know, when i was younger, i was quite a bit heavier, and i
00:18:11.671 --> 00:18:15.675
Hated it.
00:18:15.675 --> 00:18:17.010
I mean, i particularly hated like in summertime when other
00:18:17.010 --> 00:18:19.512
People would be out and, you know, little swimsuits and
00:18:19.512 --> 00:18:22.215
Little bikinis and stuff, and i would have shorts and a t-shirt
00:18:22.215 --> 00:18:25.685
On, because i just didn't like the way i looked.
00:18:25.685 --> 00:18:29.022
And, you know, the funny thing is with god, he has a way of
00:18:29.022 --> 00:18:31.824
Letting everything kind of fall apart till you realize that none
00:18:31.824 --> 00:18:35.295
Of the things you depended on are really foundation stones.
00:18:35.295 --> 00:18:39.365
When i began to understand that just as i am on my best days or
00:18:39.365 --> 00:18:43.069
Worst days, i'm completely loved by god, it changed everything.
00:18:43.069 --> 00:18:48.474
So whether you're struggling with how you see yourself right
00:18:48.474 --> 00:18:51.678
Now or not, ask the holy spirit to help you see yourself as
00:18:51.678 --> 00:18:55.381
God does.
00:18:55.381 --> 00:18:57.150
Donna: you know, a number of years ago, our little 4 year
00:18:57.150 --> 00:18:59.419
Old, gabrielle, was coming in in the middle of the night
00:18:59.419 --> 00:19:01.821
Terrified of the--
00:19:01.821 --> 00:19:03.923
"monsters, inc." was big back then,
00:19:03.923 --> 00:19:05.558
So she would come in in the middle of the night
00:19:05.558 --> 00:19:07.460
Terrified some blue monster was under her bed, and i would--
00:19:07.460 --> 00:19:10.063
I was exhausted, so i would just pull her to bed with me, and
00:19:10.063 --> 00:19:12.298
We'd fluff the blankets around us and just kind of soothe
00:19:12.298 --> 00:19:15.335
Her fears.
00:19:15.335 --> 00:19:16.703
And a couple weeks in, i was like this has got to stop.
00:19:16.703 --> 00:19:19.372
And god spoke to me.
00:19:19.372 --> 00:19:20.707
He said, "all you're doing is soothing her fears.
00:19:20.707 --> 00:19:22.075
She's tall enough to reach the switch."
00:19:22.075 --> 00:19:24.377
So i went back to her room, took her back to the switch, and i
00:19:24.377 --> 00:19:27.013
Said, "i'm not--i'm gonna-- we're going to expose the fears.
00:19:27.013 --> 00:19:30.149
We're not going to soothe them any longer."
00:19:30.149 --> 00:19:31.851
And i think we can get to this point with our identity where we
00:19:31.851 --> 00:19:34.887
Are continually soothing the fears, soothing the insecurity,
00:19:34.887 --> 00:19:38.391
Soothing the shame, because it just feels comfortable, and
00:19:38.391 --> 00:19:40.860
We're waiting for somebody else to affirm us.
00:19:40.860 --> 00:19:42.862
If you're just waiting for other people's affirmation, there's a
00:19:42.862 --> 00:19:45.531
Shallowness, there's no roots to that.
00:19:45.531 --> 00:19:47.066
Laurie: unstable.
00:19:47.066 --> 00:19:48.401
Donna: yes, exactly.
00:19:48.401 --> 00:19:49.769
And it's great when you get it, but that shouldn't be your
00:19:49.769 --> 00:19:51.571
Source of confidence.
00:19:51.571 --> 00:19:52.939
Your confidence has to come-- i mean, it was when i started
00:19:52.939 --> 00:19:55.141
Getting into the word, started reading what god said to me
00:19:55.141 --> 00:19:58.811
About me that my whole mindset began--because it is a whole
00:19:58.811 --> 00:20:03.750
Brain--it's a neural pathway change that you have to do.
00:20:03.750 --> 00:20:07.620
It's discovering who you are.
00:20:07.620 --> 00:20:09.155
We were just celebrating easter recently with our family and
00:20:09.155 --> 00:20:12.859
With my grandchildren, and i had worn a pair of, you know, the
00:20:12.859 --> 00:20:16.763
Suit shorts, the dressy shorts, and i thought it looked cute,
00:20:16.763 --> 00:20:20.266
But by the time we were going to take family pictures, they were
00:20:20.266 --> 00:20:22.235
All wrinkled and kind of a mess, they were linen, and so i was
00:20:22.235 --> 00:20:25.271
Saying more to myself than anybody else, ugh, i hope--
00:20:25.271 --> 00:20:27.974
Because my son-in-law is a photographer, i hope he can fix
00:20:27.974 --> 00:20:30.543
My shorts, to which my daughter said to me, "mom, don't forget
00:20:30.543 --> 00:20:35.315
Olivia's listening, and we don't want her to have body
00:20:35.315 --> 00:20:38.484
Image issues."
00:20:38.484 --> 00:20:39.819
Okay, to your point, if we don't pay attention to our perspective
00:20:39.819 --> 00:20:43.456
Of ourselves now, we're transferring that on
00:20:43.456 --> 00:20:46.225
To generations.
00:20:46.225 --> 00:20:47.593
And even though i wasn't saying it with a body image issue, i
00:20:47.593 --> 00:20:49.829
Was more irritated because my pants were wrinkled, we have to
00:20:49.829 --> 00:20:53.933
Be so careful that we work on us, because i don't want
00:20:53.933 --> 00:20:58.471
Generations from me missing the promise because i didn't see
00:20:58.471 --> 00:21:03.910
God, i chose to see and soothe the fears, right?
00:21:03.910 --> 00:21:08.848
Such a powerful thought.
00:21:08.848 --> 00:21:10.216
Blynda: yeah, i've got two daughters, i've got a son in the
00:21:10.216 --> 00:21:12.385
Middle, but you know, two daughters, and it is, it's a
00:21:12.385 --> 00:21:15.088
Challenge when you raise daughters to make sure your
00:21:15.088 --> 00:21:17.523
Words--they will not forget them, you know?
00:21:17.523 --> 00:21:20.860
And so it was always a rule kind of in my house, but it was more
00:21:20.860 --> 00:21:25.064
The rule for me, it wasn't a known rule, we're never going to
00:21:25.064 --> 00:21:28.468
Say the word fat, we're not ever gonna diet, we're not talking
00:21:28.468 --> 00:21:31.604
About diets, we're not--
00:21:31.604 --> 00:21:32.939
Because, one, you think about, you know, you roll the dice in
00:21:32.939 --> 00:21:35.575
The gene pool, you're gonna get--you know, so everybody is
00:21:35.575 --> 00:21:37.944
Made so wonderfully and perfectly, but i've got two
00:21:37.944 --> 00:21:41.180
Girls who are different heights, different everything, and i
00:21:41.180 --> 00:21:43.916
Just--the lord really early on let me--thankfully, let me
00:21:43.916 --> 00:21:49.021
Really have insight that those kind--that kind of language
00:21:49.021 --> 00:21:52.892
Would be really damaging to them, and i wanted to celebrate
00:21:52.892 --> 00:21:58.030
In our home how god had made them and not ever make them
00:21:58.030 --> 00:22:02.301
Feel--but it's very challenging.
00:22:02.301 --> 00:22:04.270
But i was gonna earlier read this, you mentioned it earlier,
00:22:04.270 --> 00:22:07.807
But i think it goes so well with this.
00:22:07.807 --> 00:22:09.709
Back in psalm 139 where it says, "for you created my inmost
00:22:09.709 --> 00:22:14.647
Being, you knit me together in my mother's womb.
00:22:14.647 --> 00:22:17.316
I praise you because i am fearfully and wonderfully made.
00:22:17.316 --> 00:22:21.287
Your works are wonderful.
00:22:21.287 --> 00:22:22.722
I know that full well."
00:22:22.722 --> 00:22:24.957
To think about knowing, when you said that i immediately got this
00:22:24.957 --> 00:22:28.861
Picture of like an immovable stake in the ground, like i know
00:22:28.861 --> 00:22:34.066
It full well.
00:22:34.066 --> 00:22:35.668
I'm not gonna be moved on this fact that i have in my heart
00:22:35.668 --> 00:22:39.939
Solidified that i am wonderfully made, i'm purposefully made, and
00:22:39.939 --> 00:22:44.811
So to be immovable in that means that you're not going to allow
00:22:44.811 --> 00:22:49.015
How others see you to affect you, but even how you
00:22:49.015 --> 00:22:51.717
See yourself.
00:22:51.717 --> 00:22:53.052
Because there are times, i don't mean to be vain, but there are
00:22:53.052 --> 00:22:55.154
Moments when i'm just at my house, and i haven't really done
00:22:55.154 --> 00:22:58.191
Makeup, and i'm just in my pajamas, and i get a glimpse in
00:22:58.191 --> 00:23:00.593
The mirror, and i'm like, oh, that's shocking.
00:23:00.593 --> 00:23:03.930
[laughing]
00:23:03.930 --> 00:23:06.499
Blynda: i can't believe that's actually the person looking back
00:23:06.499 --> 00:23:09.635
At me.
00:23:09.635 --> 00:23:10.970
There's just a little bit of aging happening, there's a few
00:23:10.970 --> 00:23:12.939
Things, and all of that is real, it's all real, but there's
00:23:12.939 --> 00:23:17.076
A knowing.
00:23:17.076 --> 00:23:18.411
There's just a knowing in me, because i've walked with the
00:23:18.411 --> 00:23:20.346
Lord long enough to know that are real things.
00:23:20.346 --> 00:23:24.350
And okay, so let me say this, what i do think is i think
00:23:24.350 --> 00:23:27.854
People watching may have an easier time believing they're
00:23:27.854 --> 00:23:30.923
Fully accepted by god, but we live in a culture where people
00:23:30.923 --> 00:23:33.593
Are not accepting, and so how do you live in the culture where we
00:23:33.593 --> 00:23:38.931
Are--it's a vain culture.
00:23:38.931 --> 00:23:40.600
Laurie: mirror, mirror on the wall.
00:23:40.600 --> 00:23:41.934
Blynda: on the wall, and so we can know it in our heart that
00:23:41.934 --> 00:23:45.438
God loves me the way i am, i don't--and then we have a
00:23:45.438 --> 00:23:47.874
Culture saying you need to be this, you need to be skinnier,
00:23:47.874 --> 00:23:50.576
Taller, thinner, what are all the things?
00:23:50.576 --> 00:23:52.578
No wrinkles, you need the blonde hair, not the brown, whatever,
00:23:52.578 --> 00:23:56.015
How do we manage that in a culture if you want to really
00:23:56.015 --> 00:24:00.152
Live that way?
00:24:00.152 --> 00:24:01.921
Blynda: when i think about how god would see my physical body,
00:24:01.921 --> 00:24:06.626
I immediately think to me being a parent and having three kids,
00:24:06.626 --> 00:24:10.963
And when i look at my kids, yes, i know they have physical
00:24:10.963 --> 00:24:14.767
Characteristics, and in fact, they're all very different, but
00:24:14.767 --> 00:24:17.169
What's amazing from a mother's heart and a mother's love is i
00:24:17.169 --> 00:24:21.307
Actually embrace and love every physical characteristic they
00:24:21.307 --> 00:24:24.377
Have, even the ones that are different from each other.
00:24:24.377 --> 00:24:26.312
It makes them even more unique.
00:24:26.312 --> 00:24:28.381
And when i look at them, i think of them in such perfect,
00:24:28.381 --> 00:24:31.217
Beautiful ways, that it's so refreshing to think about that
00:24:31.217 --> 00:24:37.256
God would think of me and my physical body in the same way.
00:24:37.256 --> 00:24:41.694
He just looks at me and thinks, "i created you, every hair on
00:24:41.694 --> 00:24:45.598
Your head, the color of your eyes, the height you are.
00:24:45.598 --> 00:24:48.334
This is how i designed you, and i love every bit of you."
00:24:48.334 --> 00:24:52.271
The other thing i want to remind you is, though we focus, and
00:24:52.271 --> 00:24:55.775
There is truth to our physical body, scripture tells us that
00:24:55.775 --> 00:24:59.979
Though man looks at our outward appearance, god looks at
00:24:59.979 --> 00:25:03.082
The heart.
00:25:03.082 --> 00:25:04.450
So i never want to forget that, yes, he did make me in a certain
00:25:04.450 --> 00:25:07.853
Way, and i think he thinks i'm beautiful, and he loves me, but
00:25:07.853 --> 00:25:10.990
He's so much more interested in my heart toward him.
00:25:10.990 --> 00:25:14.860
And that is where i feel so much connection to him.
00:25:14.860 --> 00:25:17.330
The other thing, too, to remember is that his ways are
00:25:17.330 --> 00:25:19.532
Not our ways, his thoughts are higher than our thoughts.
00:25:19.532 --> 00:25:23.035
Our culture puts an emphasis on physical beauty, on
00:25:23.035 --> 00:25:27.440
Physical attributes.
00:25:27.440 --> 00:25:29.709
I don't believe god does.
00:25:29.709 --> 00:25:31.277
I believe because he was our creator, the way he made us is
00:25:31.277 --> 00:25:35.281
The way he wanted us.
00:25:35.281 --> 00:25:37.149
So what he would say is i have something higher and better for
00:25:37.149 --> 00:25:40.553
You than you can even know because of the way i made you.
00:25:40.553 --> 00:25:43.356
I made you for this specific time and place.
00:25:43.356 --> 00:25:45.791
I'm putting you in places that i need your color of eyes and your
00:25:45.791 --> 00:25:49.729
Height and who you are.
00:25:49.729 --> 00:25:51.397
I need that, i did it on purpose, and we don't maybe
00:25:51.397 --> 00:25:54.400
Fully understand that till we get to heaven, because his ways
00:25:54.400 --> 00:25:56.702
Are higher, his thoughts are greater, but i have to believe
00:25:56.702 --> 00:25:59.505
It, that my physical appearance is just another tool he uses to
00:25:59.505 --> 00:26:03.476
Bring glory to him.
00:26:03.476 --> 00:26:05.678
Jenni: so it's interesting, because i was in hong kong last
00:26:05.678 --> 00:26:08.114
October, and my aunts love me, they're so incredible.
00:26:08.114 --> 00:26:11.183
And we know enough, like asian girls are usually, especially if
00:26:11.183 --> 00:26:14.120
They're not american, like unhealthily so.
00:26:14.120 --> 00:26:16.188
They're very, very small.
00:26:16.188 --> 00:26:17.523
And so when i go to hong kong, people know i'm american just
00:26:17.523 --> 00:26:20.326
Because one, i'm not large, but i'm bigger than all of them
00:26:20.326 --> 00:26:24.397
Together, and i make eye contact.
00:26:24.397 --> 00:26:26.866
That's a thing, right?
00:26:26.866 --> 00:26:28.234
Like, they don't make eye contact there.
00:26:28.234 --> 00:26:29.702
So, when i was there, my aunt, i hadn't seen her for, i don't
00:26:29.702 --> 00:26:32.772
Know, maybe 8 years.
00:26:32.772 --> 00:26:35.408
First she gives me a big hug, and then she's like, "oh," and
00:26:35.408 --> 00:26:38.644
She pinches me.
00:26:38.644 --> 00:26:39.979
She goes, "you need to lose some weight."
00:26:39.979 --> 00:26:41.914
And here's the thing, because i now--
00:26:41.914 --> 00:26:45.551
Blynda: is that kind of bluntness part of the culture?
00:26:45.551 --> 00:26:47.119
Jenni: it's part of the culture, and strangely enough, it's never
00:26:47.119 --> 00:26:50.122
Bothered me.
00:26:50.122 --> 00:26:51.457
I've grown up with--it's like, oh, it's tuesday, oh, you're a
00:26:51.457 --> 00:26:54.560
Little chunky, and i don't think i was ever chunky.
00:26:54.560 --> 00:26:56.996
I was always more athletic build, and so i struggle with
00:26:56.996 --> 00:27:00.332
Other things.
00:27:00.332 --> 00:27:01.667
My, like, physical is not necess--
00:27:01.667 --> 00:27:03.369
If i can squat, if i can work, if i can--if i'm not hurting
00:27:03.369 --> 00:27:07.673
All the time, i feel pretty good about it, right?
00:27:07.673 --> 00:27:10.176
And so i'm grateful for that, but i know that's not the thing.
00:27:10.176 --> 00:27:12.645
But even in that moment was just like you need to lose
00:27:12.645 --> 00:27:15.781
Some weight.
00:27:15.781 --> 00:27:17.149
It's like the second thing she said to me, you know?
00:27:17.149 --> 00:27:19.051
And i thought my sister was amazed.
00:27:19.051 --> 00:27:21.020
She's like, "are you okay?"
00:27:21.020 --> 00:27:22.354
I'm like, actually, that didn't really bother me.
00:27:22.354 --> 00:27:23.823
That's like, i had to learn to think, oh, she just loves me,
00:27:23.823 --> 00:27:27.993
Like are you okay kind of a thing.
00:27:27.993 --> 00:27:29.795
And i had to remember in a cultural context what she
00:27:29.795 --> 00:27:33.165
Meant, right?
00:27:33.165 --> 00:27:34.533
But it did--because i am a believer, and i have done the
00:27:34.533 --> 00:27:37.336
Work, and i know i have a lot to offer that is not just in what i
00:27:37.336 --> 00:27:41.207
Look like or how much i weigh.
00:27:41.207 --> 00:27:42.675
You know, you just read this, blynda, and also you, sheila.
00:27:42.675 --> 00:27:45.010
Like, in--if you read on in psalm 139, then 17, "how
00:27:45.010 --> 00:27:49.014
Precious to me are your thoughts, o god?
00:27:49.014 --> 00:27:51.217
How vast is the sum of them?
00:27:51.217 --> 00:27:52.952
If i would count them, they are more than the sand.
00:27:52.952 --> 00:27:56.589
I awake, and i am still with you."
00:27:56.589 --> 00:27:59.358
If you could count them, you're more than the sand.
00:27:59.358 --> 00:28:01.660
Like, it doesn't matter what one thing, negative four things,
00:28:01.660 --> 00:28:05.264
Five things, a lifetime, it's not more than the sand that
00:28:05.264 --> 00:28:08.901
God's talking about here, right?
00:28:08.901 --> 00:28:10.503
And so just seeing how god-- trying to understand how god
00:28:10.503 --> 00:28:13.639
Sees you, which is difficult, but i try to do it in how i see
00:28:13.639 --> 00:28:18.711
My kids.
00:28:18.711 --> 00:28:20.913
Now, i'm not saying that they're perfect, but man, they're pretty
00:28:20.913 --> 00:28:24.850
Great, right?
00:28:24.850 --> 00:28:26.519
And so i can't imagine even how much more god looks at us, and
00:28:26.519 --> 00:28:30.790
It's not how we were raised with the, oh, there's so many things
00:28:30.790 --> 00:28:33.526
Wrong with you.
00:28:33.526 --> 00:28:34.860
God is looking at us like i delight in you, and we have to
00:28:34.860 --> 00:28:38.063
Change that in our own minds.
00:28:38.063 --> 00:28:41.167
Jenni: i think a cultural standard of beauty is dangerous
00:28:41.167 --> 00:28:43.502
When we actually put it above what god has intended us to look
00:28:43.502 --> 00:28:47.573
Like or be like or live like.
00:28:47.573 --> 00:28:50.709
We naturally in the world want to fit into our culture, but you
00:28:50.709 --> 00:28:56.115
Got to remember throughout history, beauty standards
00:28:56.115 --> 00:28:58.584
Have changed.
00:28:58.584 --> 00:29:00.319
Being heavier was very attractive at one point, and now
00:29:00.319 --> 00:29:02.755
Being thinner is, and you have to look a certain way, but in
00:29:02.755 --> 00:29:05.724
The end, why would god create you to be a cookie cutter of
00:29:05.724 --> 00:29:09.328
Something else or someone else?
00:29:09.328 --> 00:29:11.764
You have to look at yourself in the mirror and remind yourself
00:29:11.764 --> 00:29:15.768
That god, you made--god made you exactly the way you are for
00:29:15.768 --> 00:29:19.705
A purpose and for a reason.
00:29:19.705 --> 00:29:21.240
And i know that might be hard to hear, especially if you've heard
00:29:21.240 --> 00:29:23.976
Things from other people, but god's truth is bigger and more
00:29:23.976 --> 00:29:28.147
Important and more worth listening to and leaning into
00:29:28.147 --> 00:29:31.116
Than any other voice.
00:29:31.116 --> 00:29:33.018
Sheila: even what we perceive as weaknesses or handicaps are
00:29:33.018 --> 00:29:37.356
Fearfully and wonderfully made.
00:29:37.356 --> 00:29:39.525
Take joni eareckson tada.
00:29:39.525 --> 00:29:41.760
I mean, stunningly-beautiful athletic girl, 16, dives off,
00:29:41.760 --> 00:29:45.564
Breaks her neck, quadriplegic, but she is fearfully and
00:29:45.564 --> 00:29:49.535
Wonderfully made and the way god has used her.
00:29:49.535 --> 00:29:52.137
Think of nick, our friend, nick vujicic.
00:29:52.137 --> 00:29:53.505
Blynda: yeah, right, i was just going to say that.
00:29:53.505 --> 00:29:56.008
Sheila: yeah, born with no arms and no legs and one of the most
00:29:56.008 --> 00:29:59.812
Amazing ministries in the world.
00:29:59.812 --> 00:30:01.614
Blynda: right, and he literally says if god can use a man with
00:30:01.614 --> 00:30:04.750
No arms and legs to be the hands and feet of jesus, then none of
00:30:04.750 --> 00:30:08.187
Us have any excuse, he's incredible.
00:30:08.187 --> 00:30:10.356
Sheila: absolutely.
00:30:10.356 --> 00:30:11.724
Laurie: and we can't reject what god has accepted.
00:30:11.724 --> 00:30:14.093
We can't live by labels that he didn't give us in the first
00:30:14.093 --> 00:30:17.096
Place, you know?
00:30:17.096 --> 00:30:18.664
And so, our identity, back to-- you know, now i'm not saying
00:30:18.664 --> 00:30:23.035
That we don't need healing, we might need some discipline, we
00:30:23.035 --> 00:30:26.972
Might need some growth, we might need to change some things up
00:30:26.972 --> 00:30:31.610
Here to help us just in the natural get to a point where
00:30:31.610 --> 00:30:38.384
We--to be healthy, but we have to see ourselves like god sees
00:30:38.384 --> 00:30:43.856
Us, and i know that's hard.
00:30:43.856 --> 00:30:45.391
Sheila: but when you get that, it changes everything.
00:30:45.391 --> 00:30:48.093
I remember i was on a call-in radio show, and it was after i'd
00:30:48.093 --> 00:30:52.097
Spent a month in a hospital, and i could tell that the person who
00:30:52.097 --> 00:30:55.634
Was screening the calls was not going to let a call through, and
00:30:55.634 --> 00:30:59.138
Then he threw to a commercial break, and i said, "why did you
00:30:59.138 --> 00:31:01.106
Not let that call through?"
00:31:01.106 --> 00:31:02.541
And he said, "oh, that person's angry with you."
00:31:02.541 --> 00:31:04.810
And i said, "well, put them through."
00:31:04.810 --> 00:31:06.979
And so they came through, and they said, "i just want to ask
00:31:06.979 --> 00:31:09.682
You, is it true that you were in a psych hospital?"
00:31:09.682 --> 00:31:12.785
And i said, "yeah."
00:31:12.785 --> 00:31:14.186
And she said, "okay, here's my real question, do you still
00:31:14.186 --> 00:31:17.256
Take medication?"
00:31:17.256 --> 00:31:18.624
And i say, "yeah, i take it every morning with a prayer
00:31:18.624 --> 00:31:20.960
Of thanksgiving."
00:31:20.960 --> 00:31:22.461
And she said, "then i'm so disappointed in you."
00:31:22.461 --> 00:31:26.298
And what i said to her, sounds flip, and i didn't mean it
00:31:26.298 --> 00:31:29.635
That way.
00:31:29.635 --> 00:31:30.970
I said, "i totally get it, i'm disappointed in myself."
00:31:30.970 --> 00:31:32.604
I mean, "there's so many more things i could tell you,"
00:31:32.604 --> 00:31:35.207
But after--
00:31:35.207 --> 00:31:36.942
Blynda: like, take a number.
00:31:36.942 --> 00:31:38.277
Laurie: just to help your case out.
00:31:38.277 --> 00:31:39.645
Jenni: that's a good response.
00:31:39.645 --> 00:31:41.013
Sheila: but i said to her, "is there any way you would give me
00:31:41.013 --> 00:31:43.082
Your phone number?"
00:31:43.082 --> 00:31:44.450
And so when i got home, i called her that night, and it was
00:31:44.450 --> 00:31:48.921
Behind this apparent anger and disappointment was a lot of pain
00:31:48.921 --> 00:31:53.926
And hurt, because she's struggling with depression and
00:31:53.926 --> 00:31:58.130
Felt it was ungodly to get help.
00:31:58.130 --> 00:32:00.666
And i mean, i say this all the time, but one of my daily
00:32:00.666 --> 00:32:03.669
Prayers is, lord, give me eyes to see what i will miss without
00:32:03.669 --> 00:32:08.273
You, give me ears to hear.
00:32:08.273 --> 00:32:10.275
Even like yesterday, i'm in the house, and we have this little
00:32:10.275 --> 00:32:13.545
Yorkie who barks like a lunatic, and she's just--she's adorable.
00:32:13.545 --> 00:32:18.650
Suddenly our fire alarm goes off, and it's like so loud, and
00:32:18.650 --> 00:32:23.155
I don't know what to do, because nothing in the house is on fire,
00:32:23.155 --> 00:32:25.891
But i'm attached--there's like four town homes attached, so if
00:32:25.891 --> 00:32:28.560
It goes off in one, it goes off in all of them.
00:32:28.560 --> 00:32:31.797
So i try to get maggie to take her outside, and she hides under
00:32:31.797 --> 00:32:35.934
The chair, she won't come out.
00:32:35.934 --> 00:32:37.636
So i go outside to see what's going on, and there's this
00:32:37.636 --> 00:32:40.439
Discussion amongst our neighbors.
00:32:40.439 --> 00:32:43.075
My next door neighbor, she had left a bagel in the oven and got
00:32:43.075 --> 00:32:47.846
On a phone call and forgot about it, and then opened the oven
00:32:47.846 --> 00:32:50.015
Door and the smoke just, you know, kind of.
00:32:50.015 --> 00:32:52.084
And so she was out, my neighbor to the left was out with her
00:32:52.084 --> 00:32:56.288
Dog, and another neighbor with a dog, and she was kind of mad
00:32:56.288 --> 00:33:00.025
With her that, you know, that she'd had to get out of the
00:33:00.025 --> 00:33:02.961
House, and her dog was going nuts and running around
00:33:02.961 --> 00:33:04.930
The pond.
00:33:04.930 --> 00:33:06.265
The only thing i felt, i felt the holy spirit say to me, "go
00:33:06.265 --> 00:33:09.601
And--" i mean, my neighbor's 84, "go and wrap your arms
00:33:09.601 --> 00:33:14.239
Around her."
00:33:14.239 --> 00:33:15.574
So, i went up to her, and i wrapped my arms around her, and
00:33:15.574 --> 00:33:18.310
I said, "if it wasn't you, it would have been me."
00:33:18.310 --> 00:33:20.879
You know, we've all done things like that.
00:33:20.879 --> 00:33:23.682
And it was so interesting, because i thought just the
00:33:23.682 --> 00:33:26.852
Simplest things of asking god for eyes to see and to hear
00:33:26.852 --> 00:33:32.091
What's happening behind-- because sometimes the words
00:33:32.091 --> 00:33:34.326
Coming out of somebody's mouth are harsh or unkind, but you
00:33:34.326 --> 00:33:38.664
Don't really know what's going on.
00:33:38.664 --> 00:33:40.466
But i love the fact that the holy spirit is always willing to
00:33:40.466 --> 00:33:44.002
Say, hey, take a look at this.
00:33:44.002 --> 00:33:45.971
What about that?
00:33:45.971 --> 00:33:48.073
Laurie: well, and i think it comes down to the words that
00:33:48.073 --> 00:33:50.442
We speak.
00:33:50.442 --> 00:33:51.777
You know, if we're agreeing with the lies in our head, then we're
00:33:51.777 --> 00:33:55.214
Actually improving, empowering that through our lives.
00:33:55.214 --> 00:33:59.751
If we take those thoughts, and we start thinking what god has
00:33:59.751 --> 00:34:04.590
Said about me, you start coming in line and in agreement with
00:34:04.590 --> 00:34:09.128
God, that's gonna change your life, that's gonna change--
00:34:09.128 --> 00:34:12.264
Because it's gonna renew your mind, right?
00:34:12.264 --> 00:34:15.534
With the truth of god's word, and it changes everything.
00:34:15.534 --> 00:34:18.770
It changes how you interact with your neighbor.
00:34:18.770 --> 00:34:22.107
It changes, you know, everything that we do
00:34:22.107 --> 00:34:26.478
When we know who we are in christ.
00:34:26.478 --> 00:34:29.781
[music]
00:34:29.781 --> 00:34:36.255
Blynda: hi, everyone, we're answering your questions behind
00:34:36.255 --> 00:34:38.590
The scenes here at "better together," and i've got donna
00:34:38.590 --> 00:34:41.093
Here with me.
00:34:41.093 --> 00:34:42.427
Donna, i'm gonna ask you a question from candace.
00:34:42.427 --> 00:34:46.031
It says, "i've struggled with an eating disorder several times
00:34:46.031 --> 00:34:49.368
Throughout my life.
00:34:49.368 --> 00:34:50.702
I don't feel like church is a safe place to talk about this.
00:34:50.702 --> 00:34:53.772
How can i be free from shame?"
00:34:53.772 --> 00:34:55.974
Donna: you know what, candace?
00:34:55.974 --> 00:34:57.309
It's a really good question, and i actually struggled with
00:34:57.309 --> 00:35:00.846
Anorexia early on when i was in high school, early days of
00:35:00.846 --> 00:35:04.249
College because of image issues, and part of the issue was that i
00:35:04.249 --> 00:35:09.054
Kept comparing myself to other people, and so i'm sorry.
00:35:09.054 --> 00:35:12.925
I'm sorry that you don't feel like wherever you're attending
00:35:12.925 --> 00:35:15.227
Church doesn't feel safe for you right now.
00:35:15.227 --> 00:35:17.930
Part of that may be just shame is talking.
00:35:17.930 --> 00:35:20.232
You can't heal what you hide, right?
00:35:20.232 --> 00:35:23.001
And so the vulnerability is part of the healing process, but i
00:35:23.001 --> 00:35:26.405
Would encourage you to find counseling or therapy if you
00:35:26.405 --> 00:35:29.474
Haven't already done that.
00:35:29.474 --> 00:35:30.842
For me, that was part of the healing process.
00:35:30.842 --> 00:35:32.544
And then get--obviously, it's just getting into the word
00:35:32.544 --> 00:35:34.813
Of god.
00:35:34.813 --> 00:35:36.148
What does god speak about you?
00:35:36.148 --> 00:35:37.516
And begin declaring that over yourself.
00:35:37.516 --> 00:35:39.418
But i would just wanna encourage you, you're not alone in
00:35:39.418 --> 00:35:41.954
This wrestle.
00:35:41.954 --> 00:35:43.288
There's a lot of women and men who struggle with the same thing
00:35:43.288 --> 00:35:45.991
That you do.
00:35:45.991 --> 00:35:47.326
Sometimes the enemy comes in and tries to isolate us, so i would
00:35:47.326 --> 00:35:50.095
Say therapy, but i would also say it's really important to
00:35:50.095 --> 00:35:53.799
Stay connected to community in a local church, because maybe you
00:35:53.799 --> 00:35:57.769
Don't feel safe now, and i don't know whatever it is that made
00:35:57.769 --> 00:36:01.139
You feel unsafe, but i don't want you to dislocate yourself
00:36:01.139 --> 00:36:04.476
From that, because community is part of the healing process.
00:36:04.476 --> 00:36:07.713
Blynda: i wanna highlight what you said that it is true when we
00:36:07.713 --> 00:36:10.315
Keep things like this in the dark, there's really no chance
00:36:10.315 --> 00:36:13.418
For them to have freedom and to be healed from it, because
00:36:13.418 --> 00:36:16.355
That's where it can stay, and but that does create shame
00:36:16.355 --> 00:36:20.058
And insecurity.
00:36:20.058 --> 00:36:21.994
And so i wanna encourage you too.
00:36:21.994 --> 00:36:24.229
I don't know exactly, like donna said, what made you think that
00:36:24.229 --> 00:36:28.267
That wasn't a safe place, but i really believe there's gotta be
00:36:28.267 --> 00:36:31.670
One person that you could find in the church that you could
00:36:31.670 --> 00:36:34.072
Confide in or maybe even a family member where you could
00:36:34.072 --> 00:36:37.743
Just actually speak it out.
00:36:37.743 --> 00:36:39.544
I think there's something really powerful about saying the words,
00:36:39.544 --> 00:36:43.315
They lose their power when they're spoken, and then having
00:36:43.315 --> 00:36:46.151
Somebody pray over you.
00:36:46.151 --> 00:36:47.486
But again, also, i think a professional in this situation
00:36:47.486 --> 00:36:50.956
Probably would help as well.
00:36:50.956 --> 00:36:52.457
Donna: yeah, thanks for sharing that, candace.
00:36:52.457 --> 00:36:56.094
Announcer: be the first to know all the latest
00:36:56.094 --> 00:36:57.896
"better together" updates.
00:36:57.896 --> 00:36:59.731
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00:37:06.997 --> 00:37:07.940
[music]
00:37:08.274 --> 00:37:10.777
Donna: i think there's this story, but it's about thomas
00:37:10.777 --> 00:37:14.113
Edison, and apparently when he was young, he came bounding home
00:37:14.113 --> 00:37:18.384
From school one day with a letter in his hands from
00:37:18.384 --> 00:37:20.386
His teacher.
00:37:20.386 --> 00:37:21.721
He couldn't read, so his mom-- he asked his mom to read it, and
00:37:21.721 --> 00:37:23.690
She read it, and it said, "your son is too bright for this--
00:37:23.690 --> 00:37:27.493
He's a genius for this school.
00:37:27.493 --> 00:37:29.262
We cannot teach him any longer."
00:37:29.262 --> 00:37:31.230
And so from that moment on, his mother taught him at home.
00:37:31.230 --> 00:37:34.901
So, anyways, fast forward in his life, he's accomplished all
00:37:34.901 --> 00:37:37.704
These great things, but then we find out he's going--his mother
00:37:37.704 --> 00:37:41.207
Passes away, he's going through his mother's things, and he
00:37:41.207 --> 00:37:43.943
Reads what the actual letter to his mom said, and it said, "your
00:37:43.943 --> 00:37:47.046
Son is deficient mentally, we cannot keep him in our school.
00:37:47.046 --> 00:37:51.718
Laurie: failing.
00:37:51.718 --> 00:37:53.086
Donna: so that day, failing, they called it addled back then,
00:37:53.086 --> 00:37:55.621
Mentally deficient.
00:37:55.621 --> 00:37:57.090
So that day he wrote in his journal, "thomas alva edison,
00:37:57.090 --> 00:38:01.627
Who became the genius of the century because of his mother
00:38:01.627 --> 00:38:05.665
And the words she spoke," something to that.
00:38:05.665 --> 00:38:07.500
I'm rephrasing it.
00:38:07.500 --> 00:38:09.135
But so i think it's so important what we speak to ourselves and
00:38:09.135 --> 00:38:12.872
What we speak to others.
00:38:12.872 --> 00:38:14.207
And so ephesians 1:3 says, "blessed be the god and father
00:38:14.207 --> 00:38:17.944
Of our lord jesus christ, who has blessed us in christ with
00:38:17.944 --> 00:38:21.514
Every spiritual blessing."
00:38:21.514 --> 00:38:23.149
So that word blessed in the greek is eulogia, it's the same
00:38:23.149 --> 00:38:27.253
Word as eulogy, so god is-- like, right now while we're
00:38:27.253 --> 00:38:29.689
Sitting here, 24/7, god is speaking life and promise over
00:38:29.689 --> 00:38:34.627
Us, over your failures, over your battles, over
00:38:34.627 --> 00:38:37.597
Your hardships.
00:38:37.597 --> 00:38:39.232
Everything that you've done that was right or wrong, he's never
00:38:39.232 --> 00:38:41.834
Stopped speaking life over us, and really, what is so key is
00:38:41.834 --> 00:38:46.639
That to see ourselves through what he speaks is so powerful.
00:38:46.639 --> 00:38:51.277
Not only do we see ourselves differently, but then we begin
00:38:51.277 --> 00:38:55.314
To see others, our kids speaking in that same life.
00:38:55.314 --> 00:38:58.518
Thomas alva edison's mom, i don't even know if she was
00:38:58.518 --> 00:39:00.720
A christian.
00:39:00.720 --> 00:39:02.054
All i know is that she changed the course of her son's life,
00:39:02.054 --> 00:39:04.023
And the words that we speak--
00:39:04.023 --> 00:39:05.391
Blynda: and history.
00:39:05.391 --> 00:39:06.726
Donna: yes, so we go back to the spies, and i mean, right?
00:39:06.726 --> 00:39:10.096
Just what god does through what we believe and what we speak is
00:39:10.096 --> 00:39:13.099
So powerful.
00:39:13.099 --> 00:39:14.434
Laurie: it's like redeem our vision, lord.
00:39:14.434 --> 00:39:16.002
Redeem how we look when we look into the mirror and say mirror,
00:39:16.002 --> 00:39:19.472
Mirror on the wall, you know?
00:39:19.472 --> 00:39:22.542
And see his reflection back.
00:39:22.542 --> 00:39:24.110
It's not what we do, it's what god does on the inside of us to
00:39:24.110 --> 00:39:28.014
Make us look more like him.
00:39:28.014 --> 00:39:30.316
Laurie: i think what we say matters so much, because what we
00:39:30.316 --> 00:39:34.720
Say, we start to become.
00:39:34.720 --> 00:39:37.390
That's why we have to speak life, even over ourselves,
00:39:37.390 --> 00:39:40.793
Things that, you know, we only have us to be around 24 hours a
00:39:40.793 --> 00:39:45.097
Day, right?
00:39:45.097 --> 00:39:46.466
And so not everything that i do, do i like.
00:39:46.466 --> 00:39:50.803
I have to--some things i just think, well, you're an idiot,
00:39:50.803 --> 00:39:54.707
You know?
00:39:54.707 --> 00:39:56.075
And i have to just say, okay, i can't just say that about myself
00:39:56.075 --> 00:39:59.579
All the time.
00:39:59.579 --> 00:40:00.947
I have to start talking to myself about i have the mind of
00:40:00.947 --> 00:40:07.119
Christ, i am capable of that, i can do all seasons through
00:40:07.119 --> 00:40:12.258
Christ who strengthens me, and start speaking life.
00:40:12.258 --> 00:40:15.661
You know, i am chosen, i am loved, i don't have to be the
00:40:15.661 --> 00:40:19.232
Most beautiful, i don't have to be the most fluent, i don't have
00:40:19.232 --> 00:40:22.235
To be all that, 'cause i am not that, right?
00:40:22.235 --> 00:40:25.838
All my identity, all we should be saying is our identity, i
00:40:25.838 --> 00:40:29.709
Live in christ.
00:40:29.709 --> 00:40:31.644
Sheila: one of the things i used to do with christian when he was
00:40:31.644 --> 00:40:33.713
Little, and then i started to do it with myself is when he was
00:40:33.713 --> 00:40:37.216
Ready for bed, and we'd said our prayers and, you know, he was
00:40:37.216 --> 00:40:39.585
All tucked up, and i would put his little night light on, and
00:40:39.585 --> 00:40:42.622
Then i'd go to the door, and i'd turn back, and i'd say to him
00:40:42.622 --> 00:40:45.258
Every night, "which boy does mommy love?"
00:40:45.258 --> 00:40:48.694
And he would put his little hand on his face, and he would say,
00:40:48.694 --> 00:40:51.464
"this boy."
00:40:51.464 --> 00:40:52.832
Blynda: oh.
00:40:52.832 --> 00:40:54.166
Sheila: and i cannot tell you the number of times when i'm
00:40:54.166 --> 00:40:57.470
Having a day where i think, you know, i look like i climbed up
00:40:57.470 --> 00:40:59.872
An embankment after a train wreck, and i'll say to mys--and
00:40:59.872 --> 00:41:03.543
I'll look in the mirror and i'll say, "which girl does
00:41:03.543 --> 00:41:06.245
Jesus love?"
00:41:06.245 --> 00:41:08.214
This girl.
00:41:08.214 --> 00:41:09.849
Blynda: i mean, we know in proverbs that it says the tongue
00:41:09.849 --> 00:41:12.652
Has the power of life and death, and all those who love it will
00:41:12.652 --> 00:41:16.255
Eat of its fruit.
00:41:16.255 --> 00:41:17.590
Think about the beauty of that, to eat of its fruit.
00:41:17.590 --> 00:41:20.860
I mean, it matters what we say about ourselves and others.
00:41:20.860 --> 00:41:24.163
Donna: well, also, hebrews 4:12 says, "the word of god is
00:41:24.163 --> 00:41:27.266
Sharper than any two-edged sword, cuts asunder the soul and
00:41:27.266 --> 00:41:30.836
The spirit."
00:41:30.836 --> 00:41:32.204
But if you look up the two edges in the original language, it
00:41:32.204 --> 00:41:34.440
Means two mouths.
00:41:34.440 --> 00:41:36.042
Sheila: wow.
00:41:36.042 --> 00:41:37.410
Donna: which means god speaks it, we repeat it.
00:41:37.410 --> 00:41:39.979
That's what cuts asunder our emotions, our thoughts from what
00:41:39.979 --> 00:41:43.649
The spirit of god is doing.
00:41:43.649 --> 00:41:45.017
And so, it is--it's like, it's so easy right now.
00:41:45.017 --> 00:41:47.753
You can google what are promises i can speak over myself in the
00:41:47.753 --> 00:41:50.923
Bible if you don't have them.
00:41:50.923 --> 00:41:52.391
I mean, you can start reading in the book of john, but it
00:41:52.391 --> 00:41:55.061
Behooves us to be the ones that are exposing the lies rather
00:41:55.061 --> 00:41:59.365
Than soothing them, and the only way to do--you can't stop a
00:41:59.365 --> 00:42:02.401
Thought, you can only replace it with that two-edged sword.
00:42:02.401 --> 00:42:05.304
Isn't that so powerful?
00:42:05.304 --> 00:42:06.639
Jenni: you know, my self-talk has not--has historically
00:42:06.639 --> 00:42:10.343
Been terrible.
00:42:10.343 --> 00:42:11.711
I think a lot of us, it's not great.
00:42:11.711 --> 00:42:13.913
And i remember one of my therapists saying, because i
00:42:13.913 --> 00:42:17.550
Couldn't seem to talk-- self-talk well of myself.
00:42:17.550 --> 00:42:21.120
She's like, "can you try to be kind to others?"
00:42:21.120 --> 00:42:23.756
And i will say the practice of being kind to others--and we
00:42:23.756 --> 00:42:26.726
Are not a kind culture to each other.
00:42:26.726 --> 00:42:28.127
We just say terrible things to each other, and we're so judgy,
00:42:28.127 --> 00:42:32.064
And it's just out of this nastiness that we have toward
00:42:32.064 --> 00:42:34.867
Ourselves, right?
00:42:34.867 --> 00:42:36.235
But in some cases, a practical way for me was i had a--i
00:42:36.235 --> 00:42:38.871
Couldn't do it for myself yet, so i just tried to be more kind.
00:42:38.871 --> 00:42:42.675
Now, i'm not the nicest person, but nicety and kindness are not
00:42:42.675 --> 00:42:45.411
The same thing.
00:42:45.411 --> 00:42:46.779
But i will say i do know i'm kind, because i have worked
00:42:46.779 --> 00:42:49.315
Really hard at that, right?
00:42:49.315 --> 00:42:51.217
Sheila: that matters.
00:42:51.217 --> 00:42:52.551
Jenni: and once i started being more kind consistently to
00:42:52.551 --> 00:42:54.720
Others, i could actually--not only was it like shone back onto
00:42:54.720 --> 00:42:59.358
Me, but i could see it to myself.
00:42:59.358 --> 00:43:02.728
But it took a while, and so it does take practice.
00:43:02.728 --> 00:43:05.398
You have to do it, you have to engage with it every day,
00:43:05.398 --> 00:43:08.267
Multiple times a day, or else it's just a thought, and nothing
00:43:08.267 --> 00:43:11.570
Comes of it.
00:43:11.570 --> 00:43:12.905
Blynda: but kindness is attractive, also, so it actually
00:43:12.905 --> 00:43:14.373
Probably did change your demeanor too.
00:43:14.373 --> 00:43:17.410
Donna: you know, i used to--i think it was false humility that
00:43:17.410 --> 00:43:21.614
Used to--somebody would tell me i'd look pretty, or somebody
00:43:21.614 --> 00:43:24.216
Would say you did a great job, and i'd be like, oh, no, no,
00:43:24.216 --> 00:43:27.019
That's--you know, it was-- because i used to feel like if i
00:43:27.019 --> 00:43:30.156
Agreed with what they were telling me, that i was
00:43:30.156 --> 00:43:32.625
Being prideful.
00:43:32.625 --> 00:43:33.959
And even then, like, when i'd look in the mirror, or i'd see
00:43:33.959 --> 00:43:38.097
Myself, i would always feel like it was prideful to admit that i
00:43:38.097 --> 00:43:44.036
Was beautiful or to admit that i've done a great job, and i
00:43:44.036 --> 00:43:47.573
Missed the whole point, because that's false humility.
00:43:47.573 --> 00:43:50.176
Because if we are truly made in the image of god, then first of
00:43:50.176 --> 00:43:53.312
All, you know, you're loved by him, but he's already created
00:43:53.312 --> 00:43:57.249
You to be beautiful, he's already created you to be smart,
00:43:57.249 --> 00:43:59.585
He's already created you with everything that you'll need.
00:43:59.585 --> 00:44:01.987
Self-love is agreeing with what god already speaks about you.
00:44:01.987 --> 00:44:05.191
And speaking over yourself, i am loved by god, i am smart, i am
00:44:05.191 --> 00:44:11.130
More than able to accomplish what he's asked me to do, i can
00:44:11.130 --> 00:44:13.966
Do exceedingly abundantly above what he's asked or thought, all
00:44:13.966 --> 00:44:17.570
Of--declaring the word of god over you and then starting to
00:44:17.570 --> 00:44:20.873
Believe it because you start changing your brain cells, i
00:44:20.873 --> 00:44:22.808
Think that's self-love, and loving yourself is so important,
00:44:22.808 --> 00:44:26.846
Because the bible says love one another, right?
00:44:26.846 --> 00:44:29.648
But you can't love one another until you love yourself.
00:44:29.648 --> 00:44:33.185
Laurie: remember the movie, "the lion king," when little simba
00:44:33.185 --> 00:44:37.556
Looks into the water, and his father steps over him, and he
00:44:37.556 --> 00:44:40.926
Sees his daddy's face, you know?
00:44:40.926 --> 00:44:43.996
I love that part.
00:44:43.996 --> 00:44:45.331
Blynda: but it is true, when we look into a reflection, and if
00:44:45.331 --> 00:44:49.368
We can get to a point where when we look in the reflection we
00:44:49.368 --> 00:44:52.505
Reflect our father's likeness.
00:44:52.505 --> 00:44:54.340
Laurie: and you breezed over the part is that if we see ourselves
00:44:54.340 --> 00:44:57.710
The way god sees us, then seeing others, god helps us see others
00:44:57.710 --> 00:45:04.583
The way god sees them.
00:45:04.583 --> 00:45:05.985
Now, how many times have you prayed, god, let me see my
00:45:05.985 --> 00:45:08.254
Husband the way that you see him right now and help me to catch a
00:45:08.254 --> 00:45:12.525
Vision of that, i need a vision of what you see?
00:45:12.525 --> 00:45:15.895
With your kid, with your husband, with your friends, with
00:45:15.895 --> 00:45:19.064
Your family, with your parents, you know, your co-workers.
00:45:19.064 --> 00:45:23.669
Let me see them the way that god sees them, and they're loved
00:45:23.669 --> 00:45:28.040
Just as much as i am, right?
00:45:28.040 --> 00:45:30.609
It's you are fearfully and wonderfully made, so i'm gonna
00:45:30.609 --> 00:45:33.946
Respect you, because you are a child of god.
00:45:33.946 --> 00:45:37.149
You're made in his image and in his likeness.
00:45:37.149 --> 00:45:40.319
And it doesn't stop when i get in the car, right?
00:45:40.319 --> 00:45:44.256
It doesn't stop when you get to a counter with an irritating
00:45:44.256 --> 00:45:47.059
Person behind it.
00:45:47.059 --> 00:45:48.427
They are loved by god, made in the image of god, and so that's
00:45:48.427 --> 00:45:52.431
That daily, that's that minute-by-minute walk of faith
00:45:52.431 --> 00:45:58.037
And what we do as christians.
00:45:58.037 --> 00:46:00.339
Donna: to your point, laurie, we need to--that's a practice.
00:46:00.339 --> 00:46:04.109
Can i see everybody carrying the image of god?
00:46:04.109 --> 00:46:07.746
Jenni: to see others through god's eyes, i think i really had
00:46:07.746 --> 00:46:10.816
To experience some of my most devastating crisis moments.
00:46:10.816 --> 00:46:15.120
I didn't avoid them, i kind of leaned in, not on purpose at
00:46:15.120 --> 00:46:18.257
First, but i eventually, out of obedience, leaned in and
00:46:18.257 --> 00:46:21.994
Experienced god's forgiveness, god's love toward me, and
00:46:21.994 --> 00:46:25.464
Others' love towards me, and it's that grace that ended up
00:46:25.464 --> 00:46:30.302
Feeling so amazing so that now i can actually replicate it.
00:46:30.302 --> 00:46:34.039
And so for those of you out there that are trying to avoid
00:46:34.039 --> 00:46:36.742
It, maybe just allow it to happen, because i think down the
00:46:36.742 --> 00:46:40.012
Road, you're just actually gonna respond better to others that
00:46:40.012 --> 00:46:43.182
Might need you when they need you most.
00:46:43.182 --> 00:46:46.018
Blynda: i'm gonna tell a story about my son.
00:46:46.018 --> 00:46:47.953
So, we just had an experience where my son just graduated from
00:46:47.953 --> 00:46:51.357
College and--with an engineering degree.
00:46:51.357 --> 00:46:53.292
Sheila: yay!
00:46:53.292 --> 00:46:54.727
Blynda: i know, we're so proud of him.
00:46:54.727 --> 00:46:56.128
In 3 1/2 years, engineering degrees--
00:46:56.128 --> 00:46:57.663
Donna: wow.
00:46:57.663 --> 00:46:59.298
Blynda: i know, very, very proud of him.
00:46:59.298 --> 00:47:00.866
Laurie: you worked hard for that.
00:47:00.866 --> 00:47:02.268
Blynda: i worked really hard for that.
00:47:02.268 --> 00:47:03.736
Laurie: yes, you did.
00:47:03.736 --> 00:47:05.070
Donna: high five, well done, mama.
00:47:05.070 --> 00:47:06.672
Blynda: thank you, thank you.
00:47:06.672 --> 00:47:08.173
Off the payroll is really nice too.
00:47:08.173 --> 00:47:10.009
But so he was interviewing, he kind of got connected with
00:47:10.009 --> 00:47:12.111
Someone, and they were interviewing.
00:47:12.111 --> 00:47:14.113
They had 286 applicants for this job, and my son had made it
00:47:14.113 --> 00:47:19.985
First interview, second, third, fourth all the way to his sixth
00:47:19.985 --> 00:47:22.988
Interview, and around the fifth interview, the guy that had been
00:47:22.988 --> 00:47:26.358
Interviewing him said, "you know, harrison, i need you to
00:47:26.358 --> 00:47:28.694
Know, every single applicant is more experienced than you, but
00:47:28.694 --> 00:47:33.666
There's something about you that we can't teach.
00:47:33.666 --> 00:47:37.703
You have a people skill, you have a kind of personality that
00:47:37.703 --> 00:47:44.376
We can't teach, and so we want-- we're interested in giving you
00:47:44.376 --> 00:47:48.314
This job, because we know that the skill, the experience level,
00:47:48.314 --> 00:47:51.951
That's something we can teach you, and you do have the degree
00:47:51.951 --> 00:47:55.154
Behind it, so we know that there's an aptitude for it, but
00:47:55.154 --> 00:47:59.558
The thing that we can't teach is what we see in front of us."
00:47:59.558 --> 00:48:03.028
They actually called him a unicorn, because he's a really
00:48:03.028 --> 00:48:06.131
Vivacious, fun personality, super-social.
00:48:06.131 --> 00:48:09.902
You don't always see that in the engineering world.
00:48:09.902 --> 00:48:12.671
And so, anyway, but what it has done, you just saw after his
00:48:12.671 --> 00:48:16.208
Sixth interview, he got offered the job.
00:48:16.208 --> 00:48:18.410
He's now gainfully employed.
00:48:18.410 --> 00:48:20.312
I mean, it's amazing.
00:48:20.312 --> 00:48:21.647
Laurie: way to go, harrison.
00:48:21.647 --> 00:48:23.015
Blynda: i mean, it really was such an amazing first
00:48:23.015 --> 00:48:25.417
Experience, because i know that's not always everybody's,
00:48:25.417 --> 00:48:28.153
But what it did as we watched him in these--this interview
00:48:28.153 --> 00:48:31.857
Process just as my husband and i were observers, every time he
00:48:31.857 --> 00:48:34.793
Went, and he got feedback.
00:48:34.793 --> 00:48:36.161
Now, the thing to note is the people interviewing him, the
00:48:36.161 --> 00:48:39.098
Main person interviewing him is a believer, like a very
00:48:39.098 --> 00:48:43.369
Outspoken believer, and so i know that that's what he was
00:48:43.369 --> 00:48:46.605
Seeing in harrison is this like-mindedness.
00:48:46.605 --> 00:48:49.308
But what i saw in my son is somebody on the outside, not mom
00:48:49.308 --> 00:48:53.312
Who always has cheered him on and said i think you're amazing,
00:48:53.312 --> 00:48:56.482
But somebody on the outside that said i see potential in you, i
00:48:56.482 --> 00:49:00.786
See something in you, and it's actually not anything you've
00:49:00.786 --> 00:49:04.056
Done, because you actually haven't done anything.
00:49:04.056 --> 00:49:07.326
You're the least qualified of almost all these people, but
00:49:07.326 --> 00:49:10.696
There's something in you that i feel like i can bank on, and
00:49:10.696 --> 00:49:13.999
I know--
00:49:13.999 --> 00:49:15.367
Laurie: gave me chills.
00:49:15.367 --> 00:49:16.702
Blynda: yes, he was seeing the spirit of god.
00:49:16.702 --> 00:49:18.070
Isn't that--if we could all just really rest in god has banked
00:49:18.070 --> 00:49:22.041
On us.
00:49:22.041 --> 00:49:23.409
Laurie: who we are.
00:49:23.409 --> 00:49:24.743
Blynda: just who we are, not what we've done.
00:49:24.743 --> 00:49:26.145
Sheila: amazing.
00:49:26.145 --> 00:49:27.513
Laurie: beautiful.
00:49:27.513 --> 00:49:28.847
Sheila: it might be a good practice, girls, just for a
00:49:28.847 --> 00:49:30.516
Little while every night just before we go to sleep, and we're
00:49:30.516 --> 00:49:34.520
Scraping off our face, which is the minute i get home to really
00:49:34.520 --> 00:49:39.758
Look at ourselves and say, "which girl does jesus love?"
00:49:39.758 --> 00:49:44.063
Donna: i love that.
00:49:44.063 --> 00:49:45.397
Sheila: this girl, this girl, because that's what's true.
00:49:45.397 --> 00:49:48.167
Let's pray.
00:49:48.167 --> 00:49:50.002
Lord, that is true, it's overwhelming, and it's so hard
00:49:50.002 --> 00:49:54.139
For us in this broken, confusing, segmented culture to
00:49:54.139 --> 00:49:59.845
See ourselves the way you see us.
00:49:59.845 --> 00:50:02.114
So, lord, i ask that you would give us the wisdom to commit
00:50:02.114 --> 00:50:06.285
Your word into our lives, because it says your word is a
00:50:06.285 --> 00:50:11.290
Lamp to my feet and a light to my path, and a lamp will only
00:50:11.290 --> 00:50:15.360
Show you the next step.
00:50:15.360 --> 00:50:16.728
So, lord, help us to take the next step, even just to write
00:50:16.728 --> 00:50:20.899
Down on our mirror i am loved, i am seen, i am saved, i'm
00:50:20.899 --> 00:50:24.503
Redeemed, i'm forgiven, i am healed.
00:50:24.503 --> 00:50:27.439
Help us, lord, to retrain our minds to the truth of who you
00:50:27.439 --> 00:50:31.243
Say we are, because we are fearfully and wonderfully made
00:50:31.243 --> 00:50:36.448
In jesus's name, amen.
00:50:36.448 --> 00:50:39.485
Announcer: connect with us on social media and let us know how
00:50:41.120 --> 00:50:43.555
Our team can pray for you.
00:50:43.555 --> 00:50:47.126
Announcer: stream full episodes of "better together" on demand.
00:50:47.126 --> 00:50:50.896
Go to bettertogether.tv to stream all of our
00:50:50.896 --> 00:50:53.665
Latest conversations.
00:50:53.665 --> 00:50:55.701
[music]
00:50:56.001 --> 00:50:56.001

See Yourself Through God's Eyes | Better Together Episode 1173

June 17, 2026 | S8 E1173 | 50:59

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