Better Together

Your Anchor in Life's Storms - Episode 1098

September 24, 2025 | S7 E1098 | 52:34

When life feels overwhelming, faith is the anchor that keeps you steady. God is faithful to meet you in any storm and speak peace into the chaos. He is our constant refuge. When we feel weak and vulnerable, His strength never fails. | TBN Prayer Line: 714-731-1000

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Better Together | Your Anchor in Life's Storms - Episode 1098 | September 24, 2025

- when the storms of life turn our world upside down,
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We must remember that our father never leaves our side.
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Come on, we need to talk about.
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(upbeat music) (musician harmonizing)
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- so knowing that we were gonna talk about identity
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This week, was a huge thing for me,
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Because it's been a learning curve for me with the lord,
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Understanding more of who i really am
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As to who somebody else says i am,
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Or who i think i am myself.
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So i was doing a little research online
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And i came across the story last night,
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Which i thought was so funny
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And it's about a group of tourists
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Who are in iceland, south of iceland, there's mountains
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And there's like 50 of them
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And they're on this trip together
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And then one decides, i dunno how many days into it,
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That she was gonna go and change
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And so she changed her outfit completely
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And she put on a hat and came back out
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And the others didn't recognize her,
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They didn't know it was her 'cause she looked so different
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And so at the end of the day, one of the groups says,
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"hey, we're missing that woman that had on the blue jacket"
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And they're like, "oh gosh, yeah, where did we leave her?"
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So they begin this search
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And literally till three o'clock in the morning,
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They're about to bring a helicopter in,
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Three o'clock in the morning,
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Everybody is out until they realize
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The person who they're searching for
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Is one of the ones who's searching,
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She's with them in the group
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Because she didn't recognize her then,
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You know, when they described her, she didn't recognize her.
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So she's out there with everybody else
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Looking for herself. - oh my goodness.
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- and i thought, you know, it was so interesting,
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I was reading, this is the "baker encyclopedia
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Of psychology and counseling," how it describes identity.
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It says, "in the most general terms,
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Identity refers to one's answer to the question, who am i?"
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- wow.
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- i thought about that a lot last night
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When i was laying in bed and i thought, you know,
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When i was growing up,
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My identity was very much the good girl.
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That's who i was and not for the best reasons,
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Not just because i love jesus, but i had worked out
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In my mind as a young girl,
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That it's possible for someone who loves you
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To suddenly not love you.
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- yeah.
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- and that was just because of my father's brain injury,
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But as a child i didn't understand that.
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I knew my dad thought i had hung the moon
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And then appeared to hate me,
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So in my mind, i've worked out okay,
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Love is something that's dependent on your behavior.
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So i became, yeah. - conditional.
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- yeah.
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- yeah. - i became the good girl,
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So in youth group, in school, all the way through,
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I was the one, i mean i never used to take long walks
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Down the beach in scotland
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Where i was born on the west coast and basically say,
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"lord, i won't ever let you down."
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You know, i'd made this kind of pact with the lord,
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If i don't ever blow it, then you will never stop loving me.
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- [panelist] wow.
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- and so i went off to seminary,
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Trained to be a missionary in india,
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But god redirected my steps,
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I ended up working with youth for christ
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And then i came to america
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And i was working with the 700 club, with pat robertson.
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Here's the interesting thing.
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I was probably 30, but inside i'm still five.
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- wow.
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- inside, i'm still the same little girl.
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- yeah.
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- who won't let anybody get close to her
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In case you see what my father saw.
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So our staff knew that i had a policy,
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You could come into my office and close the door
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And you can literally tell me anything
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And it will never go further than the two of us on our knees
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Before the throne of mercy,
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But i would never have dreamt for a minute
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Of saying to anybody, "i don't think i'm doing okay"
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Or "i don't know who i am."
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But god in his mercy let my life really hit the wall.
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So i went from one morning co-hosting the 700 club
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And by that evening,
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I'm in the locked ward of a psychiatric hospital
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And as far as i'm concerned, my deal with god is off,
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Because if you end up in a place like that,
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In fact, one of the staff
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Before i went that day said to me,
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"if people find out you've been in a psych hospital,
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No one will ever trust you again, your ministry is over."
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And i remember saying, "i'm not trying to save my ministry.
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I'm trying to save my life."
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- yeah. - yeah, well.
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- but my very first morning i had to sit down
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With a psychiatrist and he asked me this question.
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He said, "who are you?"
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And i'm thinking, okay, this is probably a trick question,
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This psychiatrist.
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So i'm like, i know who i am. so i said, "sheila walsh"
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And he said, "no, no, sheila, i know your name.
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Who are you?"
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"i'm the co-host of the 700 club."
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He said, "no, no, i didn't ask for your job description.
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Who are you?"
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- [presenter] wow.
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- and i remember saying to him, "i don't have a clue"
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And he said, "i know that and that's why you're here."
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- wow.
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- and it was the most amazing,
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That's why i believe,
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Some days, god will take you to prison to set you free.
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- right.
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- god will do what it takes to get your heart
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And to unstop your ears to hear his voice
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And during that whole month,
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It was just like peeling away all these layers
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Of things i thought were true about god,
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Things i thought were true about myself
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And at the end of the month
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When i was finally given back my car keys
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And you're dismissed back into the world,
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Which was terrifying honestly for me,
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But i remember as i'm getting close to my car,
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My psychiatrist called out of his office window
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And he said, "sheila" and he said, "who are you?"
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And i said, "i'm sheila walsh's,
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Daughter of the king of kings."
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- oh wow. - wow.
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- and by that point, it was like,
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For the first time in my life at 34,
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Having given my life to 11, for the first time in my life,
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I knew who i was.
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- wow.
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- and i thought,
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It doesn't matter if i go back into television,
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It doesn't matter if i end up working in a tea room
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Or in a library, because who i am,
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Because what i realized before was,
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Anything else could be gone in a moment.
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- yeah. - yeah.
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- you know, it wasn't enough to be,
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In the future, i would be barry's wife,
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But that could change.
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You know, barry could die, something could happen.
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It wasn't enough to be christian's mom.
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All of those things, every single label could change.
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The only thing that nobody could touch.
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- yes.
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- was that i was a daughter of the king.
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- yes, that's good. - amen.
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- and i remember thinking from that point on,
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It shifted something so deep in me.
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- you know, i think in life we can be taken
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To the end of our rope (laughs)
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And i've often said god's office is at the end of our rope
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And there we find our true identity in christ.
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There we have to be reminded that is like,
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I am nothing without god,
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I have to believe in what he says about me to survive
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And that is such a great place for us,
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Because normally if things are going well,
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We kind of forget about it
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And we start walking the way we wanna walk
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And we become fancy, free and loose
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And god has a way of taking us back
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To where we understand who's in control,
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Who we are in christ and that is our sure
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And our solid foundation.
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- i, the lord opened a door after that
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And i joined this group of women called women of faith
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And we were filling arenas for 20 years,
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But i remember this one woman asking
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If she could have lunch with me.
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I didn't really know her well,
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I knew she was a well-known speaker
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And i knew that she wrote books,
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But i didn't know her personally and she said,
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"do you mind if i just tell you something kind of personal?"
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And i'm like, "no, i don't think so.
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I'll let you know in a minute."
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But she said, "i actually think
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I'm a much better speaker than you"
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And i said to her, "you know what?
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I actually totally agree with you,
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But it's completely irrelevant
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Because god is not interested in, you are the best at this,
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- that's right. - you're the best at that.
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In his kingdom, the rules are different.
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- it's so good. - yes.
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- i mean, i remember the first week in the hospital,
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I wrote in the back of my bible, "i never knew
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You live so close to the floor."
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I'm so used to worshiping you and your majesty as we shoot,
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'cause i don't have enough words,
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But i discovered the truth of when david wrote in psalm 34,
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After he had just pretended to be insane.
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- come on.
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- 'cause he's trying to run away from saul
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And he's done some terrible things
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That have cost people their lives.
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So he's in a terrible place,
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Pretended to be insane, being kicked out
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And he's in a cave now with about 40 guys
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Who are the losers, the disenfranchised.
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- yeah.
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- and he writes psalm 34 and he says,
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"those who look to you for help will be radiant with joy.
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No shadow of shame will touch their faces."
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Since then, i've gone through times when i've written,
00:08:53.723 --> 00:08:56.125
In fact, who was it you were asking me this morning?
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You asked how my last book did and i said it didn't do well.
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I've gone through times where projects have gone well,
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Projects haven't gone well, it doesn't matter.
00:09:04.233 --> 00:09:07.670
In terms of eternity.
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- yeah. - right.
00:09:09.271 --> 00:09:10.272
- in terms of following jesus,
00:09:10.272 --> 00:09:11.540
In the terms of becoming more like christ,
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It doesn't matter hill or beans, you know?
00:09:14.210 --> 00:09:16.212
'cause we've all done that.
00:09:16.212 --> 00:09:17.780
You've thrown everything, everything you have into this,
00:09:17.780 --> 00:09:21.584
What god says, okay, do this and you've said, okay.
00:09:21.584 --> 00:09:23.886
- [presenter] yeah.
00:09:23.886 --> 00:09:25.321
- and it doesn't go the way you think and you think,
00:09:25.321 --> 00:09:26.656
But does it matter in heaven?
00:09:26.656 --> 00:09:28.524
In heaven's economy, what does god see?
00:09:28.524 --> 00:09:32.228
So i think now when you get your identity is,
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You know, that might be my identity for five years,
00:09:35.631 --> 00:09:38.901
My identity forever is, i am part of heaven's royal family.
00:09:38.901 --> 00:09:43.606
- [panelist] yes.
00:09:43.606 --> 00:09:44.573
- i'm a daughter of the king.
00:09:44.573 --> 00:09:45.374
- yes. - yes.
00:09:45.374 --> 00:09:46.876
- so whether things work or they don't work, i'm good.
00:09:46.876 --> 00:09:49.845
- wow. - yes.
00:09:49.845 --> 00:09:50.680
- [sheila] i'm good.
00:09:50.680 --> 00:09:51.681
- so good. - yes, wow.
00:09:51.681 --> 00:09:53.115
- i think it's so important that we know who we are
00:09:53.115 --> 00:09:56.485
And whom we belong to,
00:09:56.485 --> 00:09:58.220
So that we can stay focused on the mission
00:09:58.220 --> 00:10:00.523
That god has called us to.
00:10:00.523 --> 00:10:02.258
It's important to know that we belong to god,
00:10:02.258 --> 00:10:06.562
That he is our father, that we are his daughters,
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That we are loved, that we are chosen,
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That he has good plans for us.
00:10:12.768 --> 00:10:14.303
We need to know that because there are gonna be times
00:10:14.303 --> 00:10:16.906
Where we wrestle with doubt.
00:10:16.906 --> 00:10:18.340
There's gonna be times where we wrestle with fear
00:10:18.340 --> 00:10:20.776
And we've gotta be reminded,
00:10:20.776 --> 00:10:22.144
No, i am not what the world says that i am.
00:10:22.144 --> 00:10:25.381
I am who god says that i am
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And if we know that he's our father, then we can grip tight
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To what he says about us
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And we need this to stay focused
00:10:32.088 --> 00:10:33.889
On the mission he has us on,
00:10:33.889 --> 00:10:35.458
Because listen, god has you on this planet for a purpose.
00:10:35.458 --> 00:10:40.563
He has you in the community that you're in for a reason.
00:10:41.697 --> 00:10:44.333
Your voice matters. your gifts matter.
00:10:44.333 --> 00:10:47.103
You want to be faithful, to live your life in the way
00:10:47.103 --> 00:10:50.106
That god called you to
00:10:50.106 --> 00:10:51.507
And the best way to do that is to remind yourself
00:10:51.507 --> 00:10:54.009
That you were created with a purpose, for a purpose,
00:10:54.009 --> 00:10:56.612
So don't forget it,
00:10:56.612 --> 00:10:58.314
- it's a severe mercy
00:10:58.814 --> 00:11:00.916
How things that should have never happened
00:11:00.916 --> 00:11:04.153
Can gut you down to your core
00:11:04.153 --> 00:11:07.189
And the lord can still speak there
00:11:07.189 --> 00:11:09.525
And things can grow out of nothing.
00:11:10.326 --> 00:11:12.728
I mean, it is extraordinary, the redemptive nature of god
00:11:12.728 --> 00:11:18.033
And even the worst, you know?
00:11:18.667 --> 00:11:20.202
When i think about identity, the very core of who i am
00:11:20.202 --> 00:11:23.472
As i'm a daughter of god,
00:11:23.472 --> 00:11:25.107
I'm found i'm hidden in jesus christ,
00:11:25.107 --> 00:11:27.309
None of those things will ever change and i mean.
00:11:27.309 --> 00:11:31.547
- that more than i've ever meant that in my life,
00:11:31.547 --> 00:11:32.748
You cannot change my mind on those.
00:11:32.748 --> 00:11:34.583
- yeah.
00:11:34.583 --> 00:11:35.951
- so many of the auxiliary things that i had become
00:11:35.951 --> 00:11:39.822
When we lost our daughter, our 2-year-old,
00:11:39.822 --> 00:11:43.425
It really did feel like
00:11:43.425 --> 00:11:44.860
Pretty core identity pieces were hit.
00:11:44.860 --> 00:11:48.531
In a loss like that and a trauma like that,
00:11:48.531 --> 00:11:51.433
The very core of me, not shaken,
00:11:51.433 --> 00:11:54.970
But a lot of the workings of like,
00:11:54.970 --> 00:11:57.373
Who am i in this world
00:11:57.373 --> 00:11:59.175
And what is this life that i thought was one way,
00:11:59.175 --> 00:12:02.211
And then something so unexpected and horrible can happen,
00:12:02.211 --> 00:12:06.749
And all of a sudden you're like,
00:12:06.749 --> 00:12:08.417
I don't even know up from down.
00:12:08.417 --> 00:12:11.420
That does actually shape
00:12:11.420 --> 00:12:13.489
And change the way that you see yourself,
00:12:13.489 --> 00:12:15.591
The world around you.
00:12:15.591 --> 00:12:17.026
And the process of doing that,
00:12:17.026 --> 00:12:19.662
You talk about the psych ward
00:12:19.662 --> 00:12:21.096
And then what emerged on the other side.
00:12:21.096 --> 00:12:23.666
I think for me, there's still a lot of that finding,
00:12:23.666 --> 00:12:26.302
That rediscovering, that i'm very much in,
00:12:26.302 --> 00:12:28.437
And i think i will be in for a long time.
00:12:28.437 --> 00:12:30.639
- i imagine.
00:12:30.639 --> 00:12:31.907
- and there are parts of me that i miss,
00:12:31.907 --> 00:12:34.243
And there's parts of me that are becoming.
00:12:34.243 --> 00:12:36.679
I think in the midst of it, it was just this last fall,
00:12:36.679 --> 00:12:39.281
We've been talking about names.
00:12:39.281 --> 00:12:41.517
And i ended up last-minute trip going to germany
00:12:41.517 --> 00:12:44.320
To lead worship.
00:12:44.320 --> 00:12:45.521
Wasn't supposed to go.
00:12:45.521 --> 00:12:46.956
My married name is heiligenthal.
00:12:46.956 --> 00:12:50.226
- wow.
00:12:50.226 --> 00:12:51.560
- gesundheit, i know, (participants chuckle)
00:12:51.560 --> 00:12:52.895
It's a good, long-
00:12:52.895 --> 00:12:54.163
- i've learned to say it. - very german.
00:12:54.163 --> 00:12:55.297
- i know, i know.
00:12:55.297 --> 00:12:56.365
- wow, wow, okay.
00:12:56.365 --> 00:12:57.299
- it's like all the letters.
00:12:57.299 --> 00:12:59.401
And all german.
00:12:59.768 --> 00:13:00.936
And so i end up going to germany,
00:13:00.936 --> 00:13:05.107
And it was one of the last trips i took
00:13:05.107 --> 00:13:07.543
Before we lost our daughter, was to germany.
00:13:07.543 --> 00:13:10.212
And here i am back again, and the lord is starting
00:13:10.212 --> 00:13:14.650
To do some really deep healing work,
00:13:14.650 --> 00:13:16.986
And all of a sudden i find myself in, you know,
00:13:16.986 --> 00:13:20.489
The fatherland, where, you know, andrew's from,
00:13:20.489 --> 00:13:24.260
And then my girls are german, and it's our last name.
00:13:24.260 --> 00:13:28.330
And i have heard for a long time,
00:13:28.330 --> 00:13:31.700
'cause it's a very peculiar name.
00:13:31.700 --> 00:13:33.502
Heiligenthal, literally, it means holy valley.
00:13:33.502 --> 00:13:37.406
- wow.
00:13:37.406 --> 00:13:38.741
- and it's a very literal like, translation.
00:13:38.741 --> 00:13:40.743
And so whenever i meet anyone who speaks german,
00:13:40.743 --> 00:13:42.444
Like, "do you know?," and i'm like, "the last name,
00:13:42.444 --> 00:13:45.381
The one that no one can pronounce?,"
00:13:45.381 --> 00:13:46.515
But what's the meaning?,"
00:13:46.515 --> 00:13:47.750
And they're like, "holy valley," you know?
00:13:47.750 --> 00:13:48.884
And so, i've heard that for years.
00:13:48.884 --> 00:13:51.820
Never would i have expected
00:13:51.820 --> 00:13:53.188
That i would walk through the valley that we did.
00:13:53.188 --> 00:13:56.091
And so here i am in germany,
00:13:56.692 --> 00:13:58.360
I'm in this healing process with the lord,
00:13:58.360 --> 00:14:00.829
I'm sitting at a table for brunch,
00:14:00.829 --> 00:14:02.998
And this girl from germany is sitting across from me.
00:14:02.998 --> 00:14:06.468
And they're discussing my name, as they,
00:14:07.303 --> 00:14:09.872
You know, "it means like this," you know?
00:14:09.872 --> 00:14:12.541
And she looks at me, and she points and she goes,
00:14:12.541 --> 00:14:16.145
"yours is the psalm 23 valley of the shadow of death,
00:14:17.212 --> 00:14:21.550
But your valley is holy."
00:14:22.117 --> 00:14:24.920
And something in me turned that day,
00:14:25.688 --> 00:14:29.291
Because what i could feel was, i don't know, down from up,
00:14:29.291 --> 00:14:32.061
And i've only seen this valley place,
00:14:32.061 --> 00:14:34.029
The darkest, deepest place.
00:14:34.029 --> 00:14:36.732
My face has been on the ground here for five years,
00:14:36.732 --> 00:14:40.669
Like this, five years, of,
00:14:40.669 --> 00:14:43.205
The things that you thought you knew are not,
00:14:43.205 --> 00:14:46.408
And i've just stared at this valley.
00:14:47.209 --> 00:14:49.478
And then all of a sudden i felt,
00:14:49.478 --> 00:14:50.813
Not just the words from this woman,
00:14:50.813 --> 00:14:53.015
But the invitation of heaven to agree.
00:14:53.015 --> 00:14:56.652
There's a lot i don't understand,
00:14:57.386 --> 00:14:59.121
There's a lot that i don't like,
00:14:59.121 --> 00:15:01.123
There's a lot that's yet to unfold.
00:15:01.123 --> 00:15:03.258
The core identity of me has not changed,
00:15:03.258 --> 00:15:05.494
Everything else has felt, where am i?
00:15:05.494 --> 00:15:09.431
But there was a moment when the lord came
00:15:09.431 --> 00:15:12.534
In this interaction and said, "would you agree with me?"
00:15:12.534 --> 00:15:16.872
- wow.
00:15:16.872 --> 00:15:18.474
- "with your very name, would you agree that this is holy?"
00:15:18.474 --> 00:15:21.543
Doesn't have to feel holy,
00:15:21.543 --> 00:15:23.612
Doesn't have to be what you would've chosen,
00:15:24.513 --> 00:15:26.215
It's none of those things.
00:15:26.215 --> 00:15:28.817
But when the lord comes and he says,
00:15:28.817 --> 00:15:31.587
"this is what is,
00:15:32.021 --> 00:15:34.123
Could you agree with me?
00:15:34.123 --> 00:15:35.791
Regardless of everything,
00:15:35.791 --> 00:15:37.393
Could you stand in the name i am giving you?
00:15:37.393 --> 00:15:40.496
Not only the name i am giving you,
00:15:40.496 --> 00:15:41.897
But the name that your girls stand in.
00:15:41.897 --> 00:15:43.899
Would you agree with me,
00:15:43.899 --> 00:15:45.401
And would you say this place is a holy place?"
00:15:45.401 --> 00:15:48.404
Why?
00:15:48.404 --> 00:15:49.705
Not 'cause anything went the way that i wanted,
00:15:49.705 --> 00:15:51.306
But because he is here in the valley of the shadow of death,
00:15:51.306 --> 00:15:56.078
I have found the good shepherd that we read about,
00:15:56.078 --> 00:15:59.348
I've seen him here.
00:15:59.348 --> 00:16:00.849
And when all i've seen was dirt, there he was with me.
00:16:00.849 --> 00:16:04.920
That makes it holy.
00:16:04.920 --> 00:16:06.055
- it does. - that makes it holy.
00:16:06.055 --> 00:16:07.489
So there's a whole bunch i still don't know.
00:16:07.489 --> 00:16:10.192
I've been diminished down to the core truth
00:16:10.192 --> 00:16:13.629
That will never change, and a whole bunch of questions.
00:16:13.629 --> 00:16:16.498
- right.
00:16:16.498 --> 00:16:17.599
- but that day the invitation was,
00:16:17.599 --> 00:16:19.034
Would you agree with the word word that i have spoken?
00:16:19.034 --> 00:16:20.002
- what a powerful question.
00:16:20.002 --> 00:16:21.503
- would you agree with me?
00:16:21.503 --> 00:16:24.907
And he begins to rebuild.
00:16:25.474 --> 00:16:27.609
Even from the psych ward, he begins to rebuild.
00:16:27.609 --> 00:16:30.412
Even from death, from trauma.
00:16:30.412 --> 00:16:33.382
And so where everything can feel shaken,
00:16:33.382 --> 00:16:36.118
There's a core that doesn't.
00:16:36.118 --> 00:16:38.754
But he'll speak through the reverberations,
00:16:38.754 --> 00:16:40.956
He'll speak through the things that felt shaken,
00:16:40.956 --> 00:16:44.493
Still feel like they're shaken.
00:16:44.493 --> 00:16:46.662
And in the moment there, the opportunity is,
00:16:46.662 --> 00:16:49.398
I will say it's holy because you said it's holy.
00:16:49.398 --> 00:16:52.634
I will agree with you. - so powerful.
00:16:52.634 --> 00:16:55.137
(upbeat music)
00:16:55.137 --> 00:16:56.371
- we are "better together" because of you.
00:16:56.371 --> 00:16:58.340
- connect with us on social media to ask a question,
00:16:58.340 --> 00:17:00.976
Share a prayer request,
00:17:00.976 --> 00:17:02.377
And make friends with women all over the world.
00:17:02.377 --> 00:17:03.946
- let's keep the conversation going.
00:17:03.946 --> 00:17:06.482
(upbeat music)
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And never miss the latest news.
00:17:18.005 --> 00:17:18.427
(upbeat music)
00:17:18.794 --> 00:17:21.630
- that passage, that psalm 23,
00:17:21.630 --> 00:17:24.433
I did some greek when i was in seminary,
00:17:24.433 --> 00:17:26.068
I was not good at hebrew, but i would do some word studies.
00:17:26.068 --> 00:17:29.238
And in the actual original hebrew, when it says,
00:17:29.238 --> 00:17:32.674
"even though i walk
00:17:32.674 --> 00:17:33.976
Through the valley of the shadow of death,
00:17:33.976 --> 00:17:35.277
I will fear no evil for thou art with me,"
00:17:35.277 --> 00:17:38.280
The "art with" is added in the english
00:17:38.280 --> 00:17:40.582
To make it make sense, because it didn't make sense.
00:17:40.582 --> 00:17:42.885
Because hebrews, it's actually,
00:17:42.885 --> 00:17:44.353
"i will not be afraid for you-me."
00:17:44.353 --> 00:17:47.322
There's no space. - that close.
00:17:48.056 --> 00:17:50.092
- we don't need a "art with," there's like a you-me.
00:17:50.092 --> 00:17:53.362
The close presence of god when you walk through that,
00:17:53.362 --> 00:17:56.632
Is like, you almost look like one person,
00:17:56.632 --> 00:17:58.901
Because he's right there.
00:17:58.901 --> 00:18:00.569
- and like david said,
00:18:01.069 --> 00:18:02.371
"where can i go from the presence of the lord?"
00:18:02.371 --> 00:18:05.541
"whether i fly to the uttermost parts of the earth,
00:18:05.541 --> 00:18:08.210
There you are.
00:18:08.210 --> 00:18:09.511
Whether i make my bed in hell, there you are."
00:18:09.511 --> 00:18:12.447
That valley of the shadow of death.
00:18:12.447 --> 00:18:15.450
And man, what would we do without god?
00:18:15.450 --> 00:18:18.120
- right. - right.
00:18:18.120 --> 00:18:19.221
- what would we do without jesus?
00:18:19.221 --> 00:18:22.224
Because people go through that.
00:18:22.224 --> 00:18:24.626
People are gonna go through that anyway.
00:18:24.626 --> 00:18:26.795
You know, it's not like when you become a christian
00:18:26.795 --> 00:18:28.830
Then none of this stuff happens to us.
00:18:28.830 --> 00:18:31.400
It's the powerful evidence of god being with you in it.
00:18:31.400 --> 00:18:35.270
- yeah. - yes.
00:18:35.270 --> 00:18:36.905
- you know, that i cannot get out of god's presence.
00:18:36.905 --> 00:18:39.274
(calm music)
00:18:39.274 --> 00:18:40.108
Though everywhere i go.
00:18:40.108 --> 00:18:42.077
No matter, anywhere that i've ever been.
00:18:42.077 --> 00:18:45.380
It's been the presence of god.
00:18:45.380 --> 00:18:47.482
- one of the books that i read
00:18:48.116 --> 00:18:49.651
That had a real impact on me was called "a severe mercy."
00:18:49.651 --> 00:18:53.655
And i remember picking it up and thinking,
00:18:53.655 --> 00:18:55.891
They don't even look like they go together,
00:18:55.891 --> 00:18:57.659
You know, something that's severe,
00:18:57.659 --> 00:18:59.094
How could that possibly be a mercy?
00:18:59.094 --> 00:19:01.730
You know, the longer you walk with the lord,
00:19:01.730 --> 00:19:03.832
The more you understand
00:19:03.832 --> 00:19:05.434
That sometimes you and i will go through really hard things.
00:19:05.434 --> 00:19:09.605
But the great surprise in that darkest place,
00:19:09.605 --> 00:19:12.708
Is the mercy that we receive.
00:19:12.708 --> 00:19:14.876
Psalm 23 where it says, "even if i walk
00:19:14.876 --> 00:19:17.045
Through the valley of the shadow of death, even there,
00:19:17.045 --> 00:19:20.549
I'm not gonna be afraid of any evil,
00:19:20.549 --> 00:19:22.351
For you are with me."
00:19:22.351 --> 00:19:24.486
I have to tell you, honestly,
00:19:24.486 --> 00:19:25.988
Some of the things i've gone through in life,
00:19:25.988 --> 00:19:27.856
I wouldn't have chosen,
00:19:27.856 --> 00:19:29.458
I wouldn't have chosen to end up in a psychiatric hospital.
00:19:29.458 --> 00:19:32.327
But the relationship i've found with jesus in there,
00:19:32.327 --> 00:19:35.097
Discovering that the shepherd knew where to find me,
00:19:35.097 --> 00:19:38.166
Changed my life, and i wouldn't change a moment.
00:19:38.166 --> 00:19:41.270
- max lucado has written this book
00:19:42.037 --> 00:19:43.939
Called "tame your thoughts,"
00:19:43.939 --> 00:19:45.207
And he opens it with the sailor in the storm.
00:19:45.207 --> 00:19:48.877
You know, where you know you're gonna die,
00:19:48.877 --> 00:19:50.746
There is no hope out here,
00:19:50.746 --> 00:19:51.980
There's winds and waves all around.
00:19:51.980 --> 00:19:54.850
And sometimes god comes in and he does calm our storms,
00:19:54.850 --> 00:19:58.353
And he does, you know, heal things,
00:19:58.353 --> 00:20:00.722
And you know, makes a way and all that stuff.
00:20:00.722 --> 00:20:04.393
But sometimes he calms the sailor in the storm.
00:20:04.393 --> 00:20:09.765
I think that's where you're at.
00:20:10.399 --> 00:20:11.933
I think that's where a lot of us,
00:20:11.933 --> 00:20:13.835
I think that's where probably everybody is
00:20:13.835 --> 00:20:15.937
In some area of your life,
00:20:15.937 --> 00:20:17.306
God wants to calm you in the middle of your storm.
00:20:17.306 --> 00:20:20.809
He doesn't have to stop your storm,
00:20:20.809 --> 00:20:23.812
Because normally the stuff that makes us into the person
00:20:23.812 --> 00:20:27.349
That he wants us to be. - yeah, i would agree.
00:20:27.349 --> 00:20:28.717
- to look like him. - [participants] yeah.
00:20:28.717 --> 00:20:30.385
- to be that refining fire.
00:20:30.385 --> 00:20:33.155
The fire is your friend.
00:20:33.155 --> 00:20:35.057
You know?
00:20:35.057 --> 00:20:35.924
- the fire is favor.
00:20:35.924 --> 00:20:37.526
- darah's been through the fire.
00:20:38.160 --> 00:20:39.895
- i had so many questions about faith
00:20:39.895 --> 00:20:41.830
At one season in my life.
00:20:41.830 --> 00:20:43.732
I shared before that i grew up,
00:20:43.732 --> 00:20:46.702
I loved jesus with all my heart, i knew i was loved,
00:20:46.702 --> 00:20:50.005
And you know, my mom and my dad were wonderful
00:20:50.005 --> 00:20:53.342
At instilling that in me.
00:20:53.342 --> 00:20:54.609
And i just have always had this ability
00:20:54.609 --> 00:20:57.379
To have just kind of like a childlike faith,
00:20:57.379 --> 00:20:59.881
Like if god says it, i'm gonna believe it.
00:20:59.881 --> 00:21:01.750
When i was at 24 years old,
00:21:01.750 --> 00:21:05.954
My dad was diagnosed with a really rare form of cancer,
00:21:05.954 --> 00:21:09.791
And he was 53, and i was about to have my first child,
00:21:09.791 --> 00:21:14.129
And it just like rocked us.
00:21:14.129 --> 00:21:18.400
He was one of 30 in the whole world
00:21:18.400 --> 00:21:21.370
Who had this type of cancer,
00:21:21.370 --> 00:21:23.038
And he was the only one who had it where he did at the time.
00:21:23.038 --> 00:21:25.640
And i just believed everything that the word said
00:21:25.640 --> 00:21:28.310
About god as our healer, and he's able.
00:21:28.310 --> 00:21:30.879
And so we began praying
00:21:30.879 --> 00:21:32.781
And believing that god was gonna miraculously heal my dad.
00:21:32.781 --> 00:21:36.718
And people around the world we're praying and believing,
00:21:36.718 --> 00:21:39.354
And we were just united in our faith
00:21:39.354 --> 00:21:41.089
That god was gonna miraculously heal him.
00:21:41.089 --> 00:21:42.991
And my dad battled this cancer for three and a half years,
00:21:42.991 --> 00:21:47.496
And when i was 27 years old,
00:21:47.496 --> 00:21:50.065
God chose to heal him on the other side of eternity.
00:21:50.065 --> 00:21:52.701
And i remember this moment where we were there,
00:21:52.701 --> 00:21:57.372
And we had just chosen to take him off life support,
00:21:57.372 --> 00:22:00.175
And you know, still believing for a miracle,
00:22:00.175 --> 00:22:03.044
And we said goodbye.
00:22:03.044 --> 00:22:04.579
And i remember sitting in the chapel of this hospital,
00:22:04.579 --> 00:22:06.848
And i'm young, i've got this little three-year-old,
00:22:06.848 --> 00:22:10.419
And i remember putting my face in my hands and just like,
00:22:10.419 --> 00:22:13.655
God, like how am i even functioning right now?
00:22:13.655 --> 00:22:16.525
And i felt like the lord said, like, "this is my grace."
00:22:16.525 --> 00:22:20.429
And for me, just all of a sudden,
00:22:20.429 --> 00:22:22.330
These revelations of the lord just became even brighter.
00:22:22.330 --> 00:22:26.968
I feel like god's so close to us in the midst of our pain
00:22:28.136 --> 00:22:30.272
And the loss and the challenges,
00:22:30.272 --> 00:22:32.574
And it was like the lord was just showing me, i'm here,
00:22:32.574 --> 00:22:35.010
Like, this is my grace, and i'll carry you.
00:22:35.010 --> 00:22:37.546
But i really had to wrestle with, in that moment, faith.
00:22:37.546 --> 00:22:42.818
Because i felt like, did i not have enough faith?
00:22:43.752 --> 00:22:47.756
Which, that's a silly thing to think,
00:22:47.756 --> 00:22:50.592
But kind of, it's where i went.
00:22:50.592 --> 00:22:52.694
- i think we all feel that at some point,
00:22:52.694 --> 00:22:54.029
Should i have prayed differently, harder?
00:22:54.029 --> 00:22:55.630
Should i invited more people to pray with me?
00:22:55.630 --> 00:22:56.932
- like, what did i do on my end?
00:22:56.932 --> 00:22:57.899
- exactly.
00:22:57.899 --> 00:22:59.034
So god had to take me on a journey.
00:22:59.034 --> 00:23:00.669
And i say this just because as you guys were sharing,
00:23:00.669 --> 00:23:03.205
It's the picture that came to my mind, i was just like,
00:23:03.205 --> 00:23:06.241
I need to understand this a little bit more, lord,
00:23:06.241 --> 00:23:08.276
'cause i'm really wrestling with faith.
00:23:08.276 --> 00:23:09.845
And i started reading the "faith chapter" in the bible,
00:23:09.845 --> 00:23:13.215
You know, hebrews 11, if you look at it,
00:23:13.215 --> 00:23:14.683
It says the "faith chapter."
00:23:14.683 --> 00:23:16.184
And i started reading about these great men
00:23:16.184 --> 00:23:18.320
And women of faith, and all the stories that defined them.
00:23:18.320 --> 00:23:21.423
And then it gets to this awful scripture that,
00:23:21.423 --> 00:23:25.060
You know, you just hate it, and it's like all of them died
00:23:25.060 --> 00:23:27.762
Without receiving the promise.
00:23:27.762 --> 00:23:29.231
And you're like, (gasps) what is that?
00:23:29.231 --> 00:23:31.900
I remember i literally was like, "what is that, god?"
00:23:31.900 --> 00:23:34.803
Like, what in the world?
00:23:34.803 --> 00:23:36.304
And i felt like the lord leaned in so close to me
00:23:36.304 --> 00:23:39.875
And just said, "faith is not about the destination,
00:23:39.875 --> 00:23:44.312
It's about the journey,"
00:23:44.312 --> 00:23:45.981
And can you walk hand in hand with jesus
00:23:45.981 --> 00:23:48.450
Through the journey, whatever it looks like,
00:23:48.450 --> 00:23:51.119
Whatever the valley feels like.
00:23:51.119 --> 00:23:52.687
And for me, that was just,
00:23:52.687 --> 00:23:54.890
That was the revelation that i needed
00:23:54.890 --> 00:23:57.158
To be able to go, okay,
00:23:57.158 --> 00:23:58.827
Like whatever the story, whatever the situation,
00:23:58.827 --> 00:24:01.763
Whatever the pain,
00:24:01.763 --> 00:24:03.098
Like if i can just hold onto the hand of jesus,
00:24:03.098 --> 00:24:06.234
Then it's not about the outcome,
00:24:06.234 --> 00:24:08.236
It's not about me getting what i want,
00:24:08.236 --> 00:24:10.038
It's like, can i walk with jesus through the journey?
00:24:10.038 --> 00:24:12.707
(calm music)
00:24:12.707 --> 00:24:13.808
God has been such an anchor for me
00:24:13.808 --> 00:24:15.544
During the storms of life,
00:24:15.544 --> 00:24:16.945
And there's been so many of them.
00:24:16.945 --> 00:24:18.780
To name a few, there was a moment when i was 27 years old
00:24:18.780 --> 00:24:22.150
And my dad took his last breath.
00:24:22.150 --> 00:24:25.086
He was 56.
00:24:25.086 --> 00:24:26.588
Then i remember in that moment of losing my-
00:24:26.588 --> 00:24:29.591
- after years of praying
00:24:30.091 --> 00:24:31.560
And believing for his healing, i remember thinking,
00:24:31.560 --> 00:24:34.162
How am i even functioning right now?
00:24:34.162 --> 00:24:36.831
And i remember god just leaning in close
00:24:36.831 --> 00:24:39.067
And saying, "this is my grace and i will carry you."
00:24:39.067 --> 00:24:42.971
I think in the hardest moments of life,
00:24:42.971 --> 00:24:45.607
Those are the moments where i have felt god the closest,
00:24:45.607 --> 00:24:49.411
Where he's given me peace that is beyond my understanding,
00:24:49.411 --> 00:24:53.815
Strength to keep moving
00:24:53.815 --> 00:24:55.917
When i don't feel like i could carry on.
00:24:55.917 --> 00:24:58.486
In the midst of life's storms,
00:24:58.486 --> 00:25:00.121
I often think that's where we find him,
00:25:00.121 --> 00:25:02.290
Leaning in the closest.
00:25:02.290 --> 00:25:04.526
So can i just encourage you, if you're walking
00:25:04.526 --> 00:25:06.661
Through a storm right now, god hasn't left you.
00:25:06.661 --> 00:25:09.864
He hasn't abandoned you.
00:25:09.864 --> 00:25:11.499
In fact, he's closer than you think. so cry out to him.
00:25:11.499 --> 00:25:15.337
Lean into who he is. he will carry you through.
00:25:15.337 --> 00:25:18.807
- [hosanna] i think it's so important for all of us
00:25:19.808 --> 00:25:23.445
Who are wrestling with something in our lives
00:25:23.445 --> 00:25:26.381
That we wanted that we didn't get,
00:25:26.381 --> 00:25:27.549
With doors we hoped were opened,
00:25:27.549 --> 00:25:29.351
But remain shut with the miracle we're still praying for
00:25:29.351 --> 00:25:31.953
That we're not getting yet.
00:25:31.953 --> 00:25:33.221
Like i think it's so important for those
00:25:33.221 --> 00:25:34.289
Of us who wrestle about god,
00:25:34.289 --> 00:25:36.858
When we wrestle about god, wrestle with god.
00:25:36.858 --> 00:25:39.928
- yes. - yeah.
00:25:39.928 --> 00:25:41.062
- like wrestle with god about it.
00:25:41.062 --> 00:25:43.031
Don't just tell everyone else in your life,
00:25:43.031 --> 00:25:46.201
Tell the internet.
00:25:46.201 --> 00:25:47.936
- [speaker] yeah, yeah.
00:25:47.936 --> 00:25:48.870
You know, wrestle with god.
00:25:48.870 --> 00:25:50.705
Tell him what you're mad about. come to his face.
00:25:50.705 --> 00:25:52.674
- he can handle it.
00:25:52.674 --> 00:25:53.775
- [hosanna] say it with your chest.
00:25:53.775 --> 00:25:54.676
- [speaker 2] absolutely.
00:25:54.676 --> 00:25:56.044
- let him know what you're disappointed about.
00:25:56.044 --> 00:25:56.845
Like, wrestle with god.
00:25:56.845 --> 00:25:58.113
You will be brought into the presence of god
00:25:58.113 --> 00:25:59.481
Through the realness of what you're going through.
00:25:59.481 --> 00:26:01.016
You will receive the real peace of god, the real comfort
00:26:01.016 --> 00:26:03.585
Of god, where you really are,
00:26:03.585 --> 00:26:05.086
But god doesn't want a relationship
00:26:05.086 --> 00:26:07.355
With a fake version of you.
00:26:07.355 --> 00:26:08.590
- yeah. - and god can't heal
00:26:08.590 --> 00:26:09.991
What you're pretending to go through.
00:26:09.991 --> 00:26:11.793
If you want real comfort
00:26:11.793 --> 00:26:13.361
And real peace in your real situation, get real with god
00:26:13.361 --> 00:26:16.398
About what you're really feeling.
00:26:16.398 --> 00:26:17.766
When you wrestle about god, wrestle with god.
00:26:17.766 --> 00:26:19.834
- [speaker] yeah.
00:26:19.834 --> 00:26:21.236
- that is where you will enter the presence of god
00:26:21.236 --> 00:26:23.138
And discover his peace.
00:26:23.138 --> 00:26:24.539
I talked to a woman who i met in tijuana.
00:26:24.539 --> 00:26:26.808
She's a business owner,
00:26:26.808 --> 00:26:28.243
And she talked about how she had really good routines
00:26:28.243 --> 00:26:31.079
And rhythms with god.
00:26:31.079 --> 00:26:32.047
I think she knew god for real,
00:26:32.047 --> 00:26:33.782
And she lived a faithful life.
00:26:33.782 --> 00:26:35.183
- yeah.
00:26:35.183 --> 00:26:36.584
- and then when her daughter was in her thirties,
00:26:36.584 --> 00:26:38.186
She passed away and she said,
00:26:38.186 --> 00:26:39.921
"i dealt with all this immense grief
00:26:39.921 --> 00:26:41.389
And it changed who i was
00:26:41.389 --> 00:26:43.124
And my identity and my faith and my rhythms."
00:26:43.124 --> 00:26:45.660
And she thought that there was only one way
00:26:45.660 --> 00:26:48.096
To encounter god, one way to pray.
00:26:48.096 --> 00:26:50.065
And she said, "i used to pray the most pretty prayers,
00:26:50.065 --> 00:26:52.434
And i used to pray maybe even like, memorized prayers.
00:26:52.434 --> 00:26:56.104
And i had this time of day,
00:26:56.104 --> 00:26:57.539
I prayed with god on all these things.
00:26:57.539 --> 00:26:59.007
I couldn't do it anymore. i couldn't do it anymore.
00:26:59.007 --> 00:27:01.543
And so i stopped talking to god and i had so much grief."
00:27:01.543 --> 00:27:06.281
And she said to me, she goes, "you know what?
00:27:06.281 --> 00:27:07.549
I changed two things about how i prayed."
00:27:07.549 --> 00:27:09.684
And i said, what were the two things?
00:27:09.684 --> 00:27:11.286
And she said, "one, i stopped trying to pray pretty prayers.
00:27:11.286 --> 00:27:13.588
I started praying ugly prayers."
00:27:13.588 --> 00:27:15.123
- wow.
00:27:15.123 --> 00:27:16.291
- "and i prayed the ugliest prayers.
00:27:16.291 --> 00:27:17.258
I didn't even know i was allowed
00:27:17.258 --> 00:27:18.259
To pray these kind of prayers.
00:27:18.259 --> 00:27:19.794
And i got mad at god and i told him how disappointed i was
00:27:19.794 --> 00:27:21.763
And how angry i was." then i met another woman at my church
00:27:21.763 --> 00:27:24.532
Who was also grieving a relationship.
00:27:24.532 --> 00:27:25.967
We got together and prayed ugly prayers together.
00:27:25.967 --> 00:27:27.936
She knew two other people who were grieving something.
00:27:27.936 --> 00:27:30.004
Now we get together once a week and we pray ugly prayers.
00:27:30.004 --> 00:27:32.774
And she said, "i never knew that was allowed,
00:27:32.774 --> 00:27:34.976
But now we feel the peace of god
00:27:34.976 --> 00:27:37.345
And the comfort of god in the most real way we ever have."
00:27:37.345 --> 00:27:39.714
- yeah.
00:27:39.714 --> 00:27:40.915
- [hosanna] by praying ugly prayers.
00:27:40.915 --> 00:27:41.883
- yeah.
00:27:41.883 --> 00:27:43.318
- i said, what was the second thing that you changed?
00:27:43.318 --> 00:27:46.154
'cause that was just so profound and deep.
00:27:46.154 --> 00:27:48.323
And she said, "oh, the second thing is now i pray at night."
00:27:48.323 --> 00:27:52.627
I said, "what?"
00:27:52.627 --> 00:27:54.262
And she said, you know, "i don't know.
00:27:54.262 --> 00:27:55.997
I grew up thinking that real christians prayed
00:27:55.997 --> 00:27:57.599
In the morning and i had this perfect routine
00:27:57.599 --> 00:28:00.568
That i used to do for years of my life in the morning,
00:28:00.568 --> 00:28:04.005
But i can't keep pretending like my life is the same
00:28:04.005 --> 00:28:06.107
As it was when my daughter was alive,
00:28:06.107 --> 00:28:08.143
Or like i'm the same person,
00:28:08.143 --> 00:28:09.544
Or that my faith is the same faith, that wasn't real.
00:28:09.544 --> 00:28:11.713
And i was just trying to put on some kind of show.
00:28:11.713 --> 00:28:13.815
I don't know who it was for.
00:28:13.815 --> 00:28:15.350
So now i pray and it works better for my real life today.
00:28:15.350 --> 00:28:17.986
And that's how god has been the most real for me."
00:28:17.986 --> 00:28:19.954
- wow.
00:28:19.954 --> 00:28:21.322
- so i was just thinking about the stories of loss
00:28:21.322 --> 00:28:22.524
That we've encountered and that some
00:28:22.524 --> 00:28:23.525
Of us are still going through.
00:28:23.525 --> 00:28:25.059
And just, if anyone is listening that's thinking like,
00:28:25.059 --> 00:28:27.729
How do i wrestle with god,
00:28:27.729 --> 00:28:29.230
- [speaker] yeah. - and how do i do this right,
00:28:29.230 --> 00:28:31.132
How do i go through this storm
00:28:31.132 --> 00:28:32.634
In the most holy way possible?
00:28:32.634 --> 00:28:34.636
Maybe you don't pray pretty. maybe you pray ugly.
00:28:34.636 --> 00:28:36.671
Maybe you get real with someone around you.
00:28:36.671 --> 00:28:38.640
- yep. - and also,
00:28:38.640 --> 00:28:40.208
Maybe your routines and rhythms,
00:28:40.208 --> 00:28:42.844
Maybe your time with god looks different.
00:28:42.844 --> 00:28:44.813
- [speaker] yeah. - [hosanna] you know?
00:28:44.813 --> 00:28:45.647
You don't have to try
00:28:45.647 --> 00:28:47.215
And make your routines with god or your rhythms with god.
00:28:47.215 --> 00:28:48.716
You don't have to have your time
00:28:48.716 --> 00:28:49.851
With god to look like anybody else's,
00:28:49.851 --> 00:28:51.553
And it doesn't have to look like the same it did,
00:28:51.553 --> 00:28:53.421
10 years ago. - [speaker] right.
00:28:53.421 --> 00:28:54.455
- yeah
00:28:54.455 --> 00:28:55.723
- god wants a real relationship with you
00:28:55.723 --> 00:28:56.558
And your real season.
00:28:56.558 --> 00:28:58.059
So maybe it needs to change for your real life today.
00:28:58.059 --> 00:29:01.429
And i think there's a mourning in that,
00:29:01.429 --> 00:29:03.431
Mourning the way you used to live.
00:29:03.431 --> 00:29:05.333
- yes.
00:29:05.333 --> 00:29:06.734
- but we can keep trying to live the way we used to,
00:29:06.734 --> 00:29:08.169
And have eventually a performative kind of faith.
00:29:08.169 --> 00:29:11.239
Or it can be real for us in our real season.
00:29:11.239 --> 00:29:13.041
- [speaker] wow.
00:29:13.041 --> 00:29:13.975
- that's something my new friend
00:29:13.975 --> 00:29:14.909
From tijuana taught me recently.
00:29:14.909 --> 00:29:16.110
- that's very good.
00:29:16.110 --> 00:29:17.378
- when you are wrestling with god's goodness,
00:29:17.378 --> 00:29:19.981
When you're wrestling with your identity in christ,
00:29:19.981 --> 00:29:22.584
When you're wrestling with god's will for your life,
00:29:22.584 --> 00:29:24.319
When you're wrestling with disappointment,
00:29:24.319 --> 00:29:26.621
Wrestle with god.
00:29:26.621 --> 00:29:28.256
Because as you get closer to god, he will reveal things
00:29:28.256 --> 00:29:31.793
To you about yourself, about his character.
00:29:31.793 --> 00:29:34.028
You will bring supernatural peace
00:29:34.028 --> 00:29:36.097
And supernatural calm to your real situation.
00:29:36.097 --> 00:29:39.167
But you have to give him your real situation
00:29:39.167 --> 00:29:40.802
For him to do that.
00:29:40.802 --> 00:29:41.703
God doesn't want to heal
00:29:41.703 --> 00:29:43.204
What you're pretending to go through.
00:29:43.204 --> 00:29:45.640
So bring him what you're really going through
00:29:45.640 --> 00:29:48.109
And invite god to be your peace.
00:29:48.109 --> 00:29:50.712
You have to make time for it.
00:29:50.712 --> 00:29:52.280
You can't just go about your life
00:29:52.280 --> 00:29:53.681
And not spend time with god, not talk to god,
00:29:53.681 --> 00:29:55.750
Not read his word, not know what he's like
00:29:55.750 --> 00:29:57.252
And not knowing what he says about you
00:29:57.252 --> 00:29:59.187
And then think, "why don't i have any peace?"
00:29:59.187 --> 00:30:01.789
Make time for peace.
00:30:01.789 --> 00:30:03.591
Make space for god to meet you where you are.
00:30:04.525 --> 00:30:08.663
When you make space for god
00:30:08.663 --> 00:30:10.164
And invite god, you will encounter god.
00:30:10.164 --> 00:30:13.334
- i think it's so interesting too,
00:30:14.102 --> 00:30:16.237
Like the ugly prayer.
00:30:16.237 --> 00:30:17.538
I love that.
00:30:17.538 --> 00:30:18.473
I'm like, there reaches a point
00:30:18.473 --> 00:30:19.974
Where you just don't survive unless you learn that one.
00:30:19.974 --> 00:30:22.377
And i think the lord delights in that.
00:30:22.377 --> 00:30:24.646
- yeah.
00:30:24.646 --> 00:30:25.747
- [speaker 2] what it is he wants,
00:30:25.747 --> 00:30:27.115
It's like the spirit and truth, like give it to me.
00:30:27.115 --> 00:30:29.384
- yeah. - give it to me, honest.
00:30:29.384 --> 00:30:31.119
Tell me.
00:30:31.119 --> 00:30:31.920
- yeah.
00:30:31.920 --> 00:30:33.221
- because then we have this, you're right,
00:30:33.221 --> 00:30:34.155
This real sort of relationship.
00:30:34.155 --> 00:30:36.457
We can really know him.
00:30:36.457 --> 00:30:37.792
- right. - and i think
00:30:37.792 --> 00:30:39.060
As we're talking about identity
00:30:39.060 --> 00:30:40.361
And we talk about wrestle with god, like,
00:30:40.361 --> 00:30:42.530
You think about jacob where he like,
00:30:42.530 --> 00:30:44.565
Wrestled through the night.
00:30:44.565 --> 00:30:46.434
He wrestled through the night
00:30:46.434 --> 00:30:48.102
And it's like, whatever nighttime we're going through,
00:30:48.102 --> 00:30:51.673
It's like, if you don't give up, if you stick like that,
00:30:51.673 --> 00:30:55.043
Think about that, wrestling through the night,
00:30:55.043 --> 00:30:57.178
That's tactile, that's sweaty, that's like nitty gritty
00:30:57.178 --> 00:31:00.915
And exhausting.
00:31:00.915 --> 00:31:03.051
And it's not perfect, and there's flaws
00:31:03.051 --> 00:31:05.887
And like, you would know every part of each other.
00:31:05.887 --> 00:31:10.491
You would know every part. do you know what i'm saying?
00:31:10.491 --> 00:31:13.561
- yeah. - and then in the morning,
00:31:13.561 --> 00:31:14.929
What happened?
00:31:14.929 --> 00:31:16.064
A new name.
00:31:16.064 --> 00:31:17.065
- yeah. - you got a new name
00:31:17.065 --> 00:31:19.767
And i'm like, i just think,
00:31:19.767 --> 00:31:21.536
Not only do i feel like i've gotten a new name
00:31:21.536 --> 00:31:23.938
Or i've stepped into a part of my name
00:31:23.938 --> 00:31:26.708
And a trueness to a season
00:31:26.708 --> 00:31:29.877
That i didn't have a revelation about before.
00:31:29.877 --> 00:31:32.313
But i think in those ugly prayers,
00:31:32.313 --> 00:31:34.415
In walking these things out,
00:31:34.415 --> 00:31:36.250
I've found the identity of god different.
00:31:36.250 --> 00:31:38.619
I've known him different. i've come to discover,
00:31:38.619 --> 00:31:41.556
- yeah. - the god who would meet me.
00:31:41.556 --> 00:31:43.524
And through the night, that kind of proximity, messiness,
00:31:43.524 --> 00:31:46.995
Stay with me, from the start all the way to the finish,
00:31:46.995 --> 00:31:50.698
Give me a new name.
00:31:50.698 --> 00:31:52.000
And my response back is, you are faithful.
00:31:52.000 --> 00:31:55.103
- yeah. - [hosanna] wow.
00:31:55.103 --> 00:31:56.304
- and you're close and you're loving
00:31:56.304 --> 00:31:58.506
And you're so patient.
00:31:58.506 --> 00:32:01.042
- [speaker] yes.
00:32:01.042 --> 00:32:01.909
- you're so patient.
00:32:01.909 --> 00:32:03.511
You are not looking for me to pick it up, do it right,
00:32:03.511 --> 00:32:06.247
This, that, this, that.
00:32:06.247 --> 00:32:07.515
The process, like you've never rushed this thing.
00:32:07.515 --> 00:32:10.251
You've challenged me, you've fathered me,
00:32:10.251 --> 00:32:12.987
You've discipled me, you've shepherded.
00:32:12.987 --> 00:32:15.289
But i know his names in a different way
00:32:15.289 --> 00:32:18.426
Because of this nighttime wrestle.
00:32:18.426 --> 00:32:20.661
- yeah. - because of the ugly prayers.
00:32:20.661 --> 00:32:22.730
I not only learned more about me
00:32:22.730 --> 00:32:24.565
And my identity, i learned him there.
00:32:24.565 --> 00:32:27.001
- that's powerful.
00:32:27.001 --> 00:32:28.403
- you know, and let's not forget the holy spirit
00:32:28.403 --> 00:32:30.438
That we have on the inside of us who prays with us
00:32:30.438 --> 00:32:33.541
And prays for us, with groanings that cannot be uttered.
00:32:33.541 --> 00:32:37.612
- yes. - yeah.
00:32:37.612 --> 00:32:38.780
- that's when i don't have the words.
00:32:38.780 --> 00:32:40.481
- right. - and i am groaning,
00:32:40.481 --> 00:32:42.483
The spirit makes intercession for us, you know?
00:32:42.483 --> 00:32:46.788
And so we have the holy spirit to come alongside.
00:32:46.788 --> 00:32:50.158
We're talking, the third head
00:32:50.158 --> 00:32:52.060
Of god himself is living on the inside of us
00:32:52.060 --> 00:32:55.997
And in dwelling inside of us to help us
00:32:55.997 --> 00:32:59.267
And to be there with us
00:32:59.267 --> 00:33:01.369
And to show us where we're going,
00:33:01.369 --> 00:33:04.038
Show us the way to get through things.
00:33:04.038 --> 00:33:06.874
- [speaker] yeah. yeah.
00:33:06.874 --> 00:33:08.042
- you know, and helping us.
00:33:08.042 --> 00:33:09.410
- yes.
00:33:09.410 --> 00:33:10.945
- coming alongside, praying with us, interceding for us.
00:33:10.945 --> 00:33:15.583
- you know what i love that you used the illustration
00:33:16.684 --> 00:33:18.186
Of jacob there is that not only did he get a new name,
00:33:18.186 --> 00:33:21.255
He walked with a limp.
00:33:21.255 --> 00:33:22.390
- yeah. - which means that everyone
00:33:22.390 --> 00:33:24.058
That saw him saw something different about him
00:33:24.058 --> 00:33:27.562
And the way that he walked, the way that he carried himself,
00:33:27.562 --> 00:33:31.099
That very thing would elicit questions i imagine
00:33:31.099 --> 00:33:34.168
Down the road, you know?
00:33:34.168 --> 00:33:35.470
Even from children and grandchildren, like,
00:33:35.470 --> 00:33:37.472
Why do you walk like that?
00:33:37.472 --> 00:33:38.673
What's the story?
00:33:38.673 --> 00:33:40.741
And then he has the opportunity to tell the story.
00:33:40.741 --> 00:33:43.778
- yes.
00:33:43.778 --> 00:33:45.179
- and i think that's the beauty of often the wrestle
00:33:45.179 --> 00:33:47.048
With god, like the ugly prayers, the pain
00:33:47.048 --> 00:33:50.218
That we navigate, the wrestling that out
00:33:50.218 --> 00:33:52.753
With god is that it becomes the story that we get to tell
00:33:52.753 --> 00:33:57.091
Of god's faithfulness of god's goodness.
00:33:57.091 --> 00:33:59.894
Not that he did everything i wanted him to do,
00:33:59.894 --> 00:34:02.330
But that he was everything that i needed.
00:34:02.330 --> 00:34:04.732
- the circumstances of life are not meant to define us.
00:34:05.867 --> 00:34:08.636
Now, they may shape us, they can affect us,
00:34:08.636 --> 00:34:11.639
But they do not define who we are.
00:34:11.639 --> 00:34:14.208
Only god does that.
00:34:14.208 --> 00:34:15.743
And the trouble in getting stuck in a storm
00:34:15.743 --> 00:34:19.680
Or in hardship, is that we can start to believe
00:34:19.680 --> 00:34:22.483
That our identity is the storm.
00:34:22.483 --> 00:34:25.586
Our identity is the hard thing that is happening.
00:34:25.586 --> 00:34:28.422
But the truth underneath is the word of god,
00:34:28.422 --> 00:34:30.925
What he has spoken to be true.
00:34:30.925 --> 00:34:33.327
As we move toward that, into it,
00:34:33.327 --> 00:34:36.497
Regardless of our feelings may be in the moment,
00:34:36.497 --> 00:34:39.934
Regardless of what our surroundings may look like,
00:34:39.934 --> 00:34:42.203
That will steady us.
00:34:42.203 --> 00:34:44.105
The truth is always the anchor that we need
00:34:44.105 --> 00:34:46.641
To find ourselves in,
00:34:46.641 --> 00:34:48.009
No matter what it is that we're going through.
00:34:48.009 --> 00:34:50.244
- and i love this story of the woman at the well.
00:34:50.244 --> 00:34:52.780
The one part of that story that i've been really changed
00:34:52.780 --> 00:34:56.083
By is when she's having this discussion
00:34:56.083 --> 00:34:58.486
With jesus about worship, you know?
00:34:58.486 --> 00:35:00.855
Okay, so you're clearly a prophet.
00:35:00.855 --> 00:35:03.291
So it's where we're supposed to worship.
00:35:03.291 --> 00:35:04.859
We're supposed to worship where we worship,
00:35:04.859 --> 00:35:06.627
Or where you as jewish people worship.
00:35:06.627 --> 00:35:08.563
And jesus says to her, "the time is coming.
00:35:08.563 --> 00:35:11.566
In fact, it's here now,
00:35:11.566 --> 00:35:13.901
That those who worship will worship in spirit and in truth."
00:35:13.901 --> 00:35:17.104
And that little word truth, that alithea,
00:35:17.104 --> 00:35:19.340
Means with nothing hidden.
00:35:19.340 --> 00:35:21.409
- wow.
00:35:21.409 --> 00:35:22.843
- those who worship will worship with nothing hidden,
00:35:22.843 --> 00:35:26.347
That you actually get to come exactly as you are.
00:35:26.347 --> 00:35:29.183
- wow.
00:35:29.183 --> 00:35:30.151
- you get to wrestle with god.
00:35:30.151 --> 00:35:31.519
I watched my son do that when my father-in-law died
00:35:31.519 --> 00:35:33.921
And he was so sad about it and so angry.
00:35:33.921 --> 00:35:36.424
And i said, here's the amazing thing,
00:35:36.424 --> 00:35:38.359
'cause he told me he was five.
00:35:38.359 --> 00:35:39.660
He said to me, "i don't like god
00:35:39.660 --> 00:35:40.928
And i'm not gonna talk to him anymore."
00:35:40.928 --> 00:35:42.697
And i said, i totally get that.
00:35:42.697 --> 00:35:44.198
- yeah. - i said, but here's, i mean,
00:35:44.198 --> 00:35:45.866
And i bought him a punching bag and boxing gloves,
00:35:45.866 --> 00:35:47.969
And i said, "you hit that thing 'til you're exhausted."
00:35:47.969 --> 00:35:50.838
But then you get to fall into the arms
00:35:50.838 --> 00:35:52.373
Of a god who's big enough for you to be angry with him.
00:35:52.373 --> 00:35:54.575
- yes. - yeah, exactly.
00:35:54.575 --> 00:35:56.344
- you don't have to pretend.
00:35:56.344 --> 00:35:57.845
- i made a decision
00:35:58.312 --> 00:35:59.614
To follow jesus when i was four years old.
00:35:59.614 --> 00:36:01.582
It was a childlike faith.
00:36:01.582 --> 00:36:03.284
But as i'd begun to grow up, i had to grow in my faith,
00:36:03.284 --> 00:36:07.888
And i didn't immediately understand my
00:36:07.888 --> 00:36:10.758
Identity in christ.
00:36:10.758 --> 00:36:12.460
It's been a process.
00:36:12.460 --> 00:36:13.828
It's been a process of growing and learning.
00:36:13.828 --> 00:36:16.631
And the key that i can tell you
00:36:16.631 --> 00:36:18.332
That has been a game changer in my life is learning
00:36:18.332 --> 00:36:21.502
What the word of god says.
00:36:21.502 --> 00:36:23.237
It's learning what the promises
00:36:23.237 --> 00:36:25.039
In the scripture are about me.
00:36:25.039 --> 00:36:27.408
It's learning in psalm 1:39 that says,
00:36:27.408 --> 00:36:29.510
"i was created and formed in my mother's womb,
00:36:29.510 --> 00:36:32.113
That god knew me before i was born,
00:36:32.113 --> 00:36:34.248
That he planned every day, every page of my life."
00:36:34.248 --> 00:36:37.618
When i began to learn that
00:36:37.618 --> 00:36:38.986
And understand that, i developed a confidence
00:36:38.986 --> 00:36:42.456
That i'm exactly who i was created to be.
00:36:42.456 --> 00:36:45.059
It's learning scriptures like ephesians 2:10 that say,
00:36:45.059 --> 00:36:47.595
"i'm a masterpiece created in christ jesus to do good works,
00:36:47.595 --> 00:36:51.065
Which he planned in advance for me to do."
00:36:51.065 --> 00:36:53.200
When i began to memorize that
00:36:53.200 --> 00:36:55.169
And hide god's word inside of my heart,
00:36:55.169 --> 00:36:58.072
It helped build a firm foundation for my identity.
00:36:58.072 --> 00:37:02.176
But i don't always feel great.
00:37:02.176 --> 00:37:04.879
Sometimes i struggle with insecurity.
00:37:04.879 --> 00:37:07.348
And the key for me is going back to the word of god,
00:37:07.348 --> 00:37:10.985
Going back to the promises of god,
00:37:10.985 --> 00:37:12.887
And reminding myself who he says that i am.
00:37:12.887 --> 00:37:16.390
It's a process and it's a process that we're all on,
00:37:16.390 --> 00:37:19.660
But god's with us in the journey.
00:37:19.660 --> 00:37:21.796
- [narrator] let's keep the conversation going.
00:37:22.730 --> 00:37:24.999
You can find the "better together" podcast
00:37:24.999 --> 00:37:27.001
On your favorite listening platform.
00:37:27.001 --> 00:37:28.602
Subscribe.
00:37:28.602 --> 00:37:30.271
- [announcer] subscribe today.
00:37:29.370 --> 00:37:33.006
- [announcer] subscribe today.
00:37:33.006 --> 00:37:33.374
(tender music)
00:37:33.741 --> 00:37:36.844
- sometimes i wonder if,
00:37:36.844 --> 00:37:38.279
You know, there's moments of big faith to believe,
00:37:38.279 --> 00:37:41.115
And then in processing the grief,
00:37:41.115 --> 00:37:44.185
The loss, the disappointment,
00:37:44.185 --> 00:37:45.453
I remember the lord coming to me and saying,
00:37:45.453 --> 00:37:47.288
"it's not the faith in the way that you had,
00:37:47.288 --> 00:37:51.726
But the faith to believe that i can handle you."
00:37:51.726 --> 00:37:54.362
- yeah. - in this.
00:37:54.362 --> 00:37:55.196
The faith to believe.
00:37:55.196 --> 00:37:56.831
The audacity that i could show up with all of this,
00:37:56.831 --> 00:38:00.267
And i don't know what's going to come out,
00:38:00.267 --> 00:38:01.502
I don't know what's going to come out.
00:38:01.502 --> 00:38:03.771
Like this could be wild.
00:38:03.771 --> 00:38:05.172
- yeah. - it will be.
00:38:05.172 --> 00:38:07.341
And him saying that now,
00:38:07.341 --> 00:38:08.909
The place that i'm asking you to put your faith
00:38:08.909 --> 00:38:10.878
Is to believe that i can handle that.
00:38:10.878 --> 00:38:12.813
Is to believe i'm good enough,
00:38:12.813 --> 00:38:14.949
To show up, and to listen.
00:38:14.949 --> 00:38:17.551
And i'm not going to rebuke you,
00:38:17.551 --> 00:38:18.986
I'm not going to throw a bible verse at you, i'm not.
00:38:18.986 --> 00:38:22.022
And i remember there were times it was so quiet,
00:38:22.022 --> 00:38:24.258
It just felt so quiet.
00:38:24.258 --> 00:38:26.327
And i'm like, god, of any time to speak,
00:38:26.327 --> 00:38:29.964
This would be a great one.
00:38:29.964 --> 00:38:31.232
Like this, i am desperate.
00:38:31.232 --> 00:38:32.767
- good opportunity.
00:38:32.767 --> 00:38:33.601
- yeah, please, please.
00:38:33.601 --> 00:38:34.935
Like it's deafening.
00:38:34.935 --> 00:38:36.404
And i remember him just saying,
00:38:36.404 --> 00:38:38.539
"i'm listening.
00:38:38.906 --> 00:38:40.975
You need to talk."
00:38:41.409 --> 00:38:42.243
- wow. - yeah.
00:38:42.243 --> 00:38:43.177
- i'm listening.
00:38:43.177 --> 00:38:44.245
And it's in those moments,
00:38:44.245 --> 00:38:45.413
I just learned so much about him.
00:38:45.413 --> 00:38:48.182
I learned so much about things that i had read about,
00:38:48.182 --> 00:38:53.454
Things that i'd heard about,
00:38:54.054 --> 00:38:54.989
Things that i thought i knew
00:38:54.989 --> 00:38:57.091
At a whole new level.
00:38:57.091 --> 00:38:59.393
Just about who he is and that he can handle it.
00:38:59.393 --> 00:39:01.796
And my belief in his goodness,
00:39:01.796 --> 00:39:03.731
I'm going to test, i'm going to stand on it
00:39:03.731 --> 00:39:06.200
By being here and saying what i actually mean.
00:39:06.200 --> 00:39:10.471
And watching you.
00:39:10.471 --> 00:39:12.239
You didn't do any of the things
00:39:12.239 --> 00:39:13.374
I was afraid you were going to do,
00:39:13.374 --> 00:39:14.275
You pulled in closer,
00:39:14.275 --> 00:39:15.843
You listened longer.
00:39:15.843 --> 00:39:16.844
- yeah. - yeah.
00:39:16.844 --> 00:39:18.279
- jacob would not have exchanged that lump for anything.
00:39:18.279 --> 00:39:20.047
Israel, he would not have changed that.
00:39:20.047 --> 00:39:21.749
Because it's like job, at the end of his story,
00:39:21.749 --> 00:39:24.552
You are like, i'd heard about you before.
00:39:24.552 --> 00:39:26.020
- yeah, but now my eyes see you.
00:39:26.020 --> 00:39:27.655
- but now my eyes have seen you.
00:39:27.655 --> 00:39:29.256
It's like you're a different woman,
00:39:29.256 --> 00:39:31.325
You're a different mother,
00:39:31.325 --> 00:39:32.626
You're a different worship leader,
00:39:32.626 --> 00:39:34.228
You're a different daughter of the king.
00:39:34.228 --> 00:39:36.730
And it's a severe mercy.
00:39:36.730 --> 00:39:39.233
But as severe as it is, there is mercy too.
00:39:39.233 --> 00:39:42.970
- i think probably for me,
00:39:43.537 --> 00:39:44.872
When we find ourselves in these storms of life,
00:39:44.872 --> 00:39:48.609
Things that are seemingly shaking our world
00:39:48.609 --> 00:39:52.947
Or tipping it upside down,
00:39:52.947 --> 00:39:55.516
It's that you are not alone.
00:39:55.516 --> 00:39:57.718
Jesus doesn't ever leave us alone.
00:39:57.718 --> 00:40:00.020
He said, i am with you always to the end of the earth.
00:40:00.020 --> 00:40:04.859
I will never leave you.
00:40:04.859 --> 00:40:06.594
I'll never forsake you.
00:40:06.594 --> 00:40:08.562
Where can i go from the presence of the lord? nowhere.
00:40:08.562 --> 00:40:12.199
Nowhere can we go without being in the presence of the lord.
00:40:12.199 --> 00:40:16.337
So i encourage you today, know that he's with you.
00:40:16.337 --> 00:40:19.840
If your world is upside down, know that he's there,
00:40:19.840 --> 00:40:23.010
He's making things right for you today.
00:40:23.010 --> 00:40:25.880
- isn't it beautiful? like in talking about identity,
00:40:26.947 --> 00:40:29.783
Even just said that, i go, yeah.
00:40:29.783 --> 00:40:32.553
Like some of the most painful,
00:40:32.553 --> 00:40:35.422
Gut-wrenching moments of my life
00:40:35.422 --> 00:40:39.894
Have yet been the most defining
00:40:39.894 --> 00:40:42.930
Of who i am and whose i am.
00:40:42.930 --> 00:40:47.134
- [sheila] absolutely.
00:40:47.134 --> 00:40:48.235
- it's like those are the moments
00:40:48.235 --> 00:40:49.770
That have helped define the identity that i have
00:40:49.770 --> 00:40:53.107
As god's daughter.
00:40:53.107 --> 00:40:54.375
- right. it's shown you too what you're made of.
00:40:54.375 --> 00:40:57.177
There's things that are true about you,
00:40:57.177 --> 00:40:58.379
You didn't even know about you.
00:40:58.379 --> 00:41:00.247
You were braver than you thought.
00:41:00.247 --> 00:41:02.116
You were tougher than you thought.
00:41:02.116 --> 00:41:03.450
Stronger than you thought.
00:41:03.450 --> 00:41:04.685
And there's things that
00:41:04.685 --> 00:41:06.220
These trials have revealed to you even about you
00:41:06.220 --> 00:41:10.157
That you didn't know about yourself.
00:41:10.157 --> 00:41:12.793
I love that you both referenced john 4, how jesus says,
00:41:12.793 --> 00:41:17.164
True worshipers will worship me in spirit and in truth.
00:41:17.164 --> 00:41:20.167
And i think, you know, different translations
00:41:20.167 --> 00:41:21.902
Say different words. the true worshipers, real worshipers.
00:41:21.902 --> 00:41:25.039
But whichever one it is, i love this idea
00:41:25.039 --> 00:41:27.741
Because it also reflects something
00:41:27.741 --> 00:41:29.376
Not just about what she thought about herself,
00:41:29.376 --> 00:41:31.278
Something that we often think about ourselves.
00:41:31.278 --> 00:41:33.347
We think there's a certain way to worship god.
00:41:33.347 --> 00:41:35.816
- yeah. - right? jesus says
00:41:35.816 --> 00:41:36.784
All these things. she thinks,
00:41:36.784 --> 00:41:38.118
"oh, is this the place or is that the place?
00:41:38.118 --> 00:41:40.654
Well, i'm not the person.
00:41:40.654 --> 00:41:41.855
Well, this is my past.
00:41:41.855 --> 00:41:43.390
Well, this is where i'm from, here's where you're from.
00:41:43.390 --> 00:41:44.959
Is this the location?"
00:41:44.959 --> 00:41:46.193
And we could read this and we're like,
00:41:46.193 --> 00:41:47.695
"ah man, she doesn't even know who she's talking to."
00:41:47.695 --> 00:41:49.763
But how often do we feel these things too?
00:41:49.763 --> 00:41:52.833
Am i worshiping god in the perfect way?
00:41:52.833 --> 00:41:54.268
Am i waking up at the exact time of day?
00:41:54.268 --> 00:41:55.936
Am i reading the right translation?
00:41:55.936 --> 00:41:57.171
Am i praying the right words?
00:41:57.171 --> 00:41:58.772
Am i living the perfect, most christian holy life i can be?
00:41:58.772 --> 00:42:01.375
And what is she doing? what is he doing?
00:42:01.375 --> 00:42:02.576
And we're scrolling through
00:42:02.576 --> 00:42:03.744
Who we think are spiritual athletes,
00:42:03.744 --> 00:42:05.613
Thinking like, "oh my goodness,
00:42:05.613 --> 00:42:06.714
If i have to only live like them."
00:42:06.714 --> 00:42:08.082
And jesus said over 2000 years ago
00:42:08.082 --> 00:42:10.351
To someone who had the same questions
00:42:10.351 --> 00:42:11.785
And same doubts we did, and said,
00:42:11.785 --> 00:42:13.787
This is the real worship i'm looking for.
00:42:13.787 --> 00:42:16.023
I'm looking for real worshipers.
00:42:16.023 --> 00:42:17.691
And it's not about your location
00:42:17.691 --> 00:42:19.193
And it's not about where you're from or what you've done,
00:42:19.193 --> 00:42:21.261
And i want you to worship me in spirit and truth.
00:42:21.261 --> 00:42:23.597
I think some of us still have to unlearn this lie
00:42:23.597 --> 00:42:28.402
That there's only one way to worship god
00:42:28.402 --> 00:42:30.771
And one way to encounter god.
00:42:30.771 --> 00:42:32.506
He doesn't want curated worship.
00:42:32.506 --> 00:42:34.408
He doesn't want fake worship.
00:42:34.408 --> 00:42:35.943
And he doesn't even want us all to worship him the same way.
00:42:35.943 --> 00:42:38.545
He's saying, i'm looking after real worship.
00:42:38.545 --> 00:42:40.147
And i just think that same lesson
00:42:40.147 --> 00:42:41.682
That jesus wanted to say to her.
00:42:41.682 --> 00:42:43.517
It's a kindness of god for us
00:42:43.517 --> 00:42:45.853
To be reminded of it still today.
00:42:45.853 --> 00:42:47.688
- so good. you know, i think a lot of us go through things
00:42:47.688 --> 00:42:51.258
That just shock us to the core, that surprise us,
00:42:52.259 --> 00:42:55.929
That take our breath away.
00:42:55.929 --> 00:42:58.866
I can't even describe your situation,
00:42:58.866 --> 00:43:00.634
But a lot of times, the reaction is,
00:43:00.634 --> 00:43:04.071
Oh god, what have i done to deserve this?
00:43:04.071 --> 00:43:06.640
What did i do? where did it go wrong?
00:43:06.640 --> 00:43:09.410
And to think that god is in everything,
00:43:10.277 --> 00:43:14.715
And god knows everything,
00:43:14.715 --> 00:43:18.052
And god knew everything,
00:43:18.052 --> 00:43:21.655
And god's plan,
00:43:21.655 --> 00:43:24.525
That if we love god and we are submitted to god
00:43:24.525 --> 00:43:29.763
In his ways for us,
00:43:30.230 --> 00:43:32.132
That we have to trust god in a way that says,
00:43:32.132 --> 00:43:36.837
This did not surprise you.
00:43:36.837 --> 00:43:40.641
This didn't shock you.
00:43:41.141 --> 00:43:43.043
Even though i'm shocked to the core,
00:43:43.043 --> 00:43:44.778
I'm rocked to the core,
00:43:44.778 --> 00:43:47.347
This is not surprising to you.
00:43:47.347 --> 00:43:50.117
- sometimes you go through things
00:43:50.851 --> 00:43:52.052
That are like life-altering.
00:43:52.052 --> 00:43:53.420
It's almost like the movie the wizard of oz.
00:43:53.420 --> 00:43:55.055
Remember that dorothy's out there looking
00:43:55.055 --> 00:43:56.857
At this bleak landscape and she's imagining a rainbow.
00:43:56.857 --> 00:44:00.794
And what she doesn't know is a tornado
00:44:00.794 --> 00:44:03.263
That's heading right for her.
00:44:03.263 --> 00:44:04.998
Something that would change the landscape of life.
00:44:04.998 --> 00:44:07.534
Maybe you've been there,
00:44:07.534 --> 00:44:08.802
Something like that has happened to you,
00:44:08.802 --> 00:44:10.704
Something you didn't see coming,
00:44:10.704 --> 00:44:12.940
Something that you didn't prepare for.
00:44:12.940 --> 00:44:15.309
I have discovered in my many years of walking with the lord
00:44:15.309 --> 00:44:18.245
Is that nothing that happens to you or to me
00:44:18.245 --> 00:44:21.548
Today or tomorrow or next week or next month
00:44:21.548 --> 00:44:25.185
Is a surprise to the lord.
00:44:25.185 --> 00:44:26.954
And i think there's something about,
00:44:26.954 --> 00:44:28.822
I guess that's why i love psalm 91,
00:44:28.822 --> 00:44:30.824
Where we're encouraged to take shelter
00:44:30.824 --> 00:44:32.960
Under the shadow of the almighty.
00:44:32.960 --> 00:44:35.429
My mom was a farm accountant in scotland,
00:44:35.429 --> 00:44:37.564
And there was a day when a farm had lost everything,
00:44:37.564 --> 00:44:39.867
The farm had been burnt to the ground.
00:44:39.867 --> 00:44:41.835
And they were walking the grounds assessing the damage,
00:44:41.835 --> 00:44:44.538
And they came across this hen
00:44:44.538 --> 00:44:47.074
That had been badly charred by the fire.
00:44:47.074 --> 00:44:49.476
And the farmer just gently with his boot
00:44:49.476 --> 00:44:51.245
Just moved the hen out the way.
00:44:51.245 --> 00:44:53.413
But underneath were six live little chicks.
00:44:53.413 --> 00:44:56.884
This hen had spread her wings over her little ones
00:44:56.884 --> 00:44:59.887
To protect them,
00:44:59.887 --> 00:45:01.121
And that's what god has done over you.
00:45:01.121 --> 00:45:02.856
God has spread his wings over you in christ
00:45:02.856 --> 00:45:05.559
To protect you from the storms of life.
00:45:05.559 --> 00:45:08.061
- my kids lost a baby in jerusalem a couple years ago,
00:45:09.163 --> 00:45:12.866
And my son was sitting in the room
00:45:12.866 --> 00:45:16.503
With me while audrey was having the baby.
00:45:16.503 --> 00:45:19.673
And his first thing was, "we shouldn't have come."
00:45:19.673 --> 00:45:24.178
- mm.
00:45:24.178 --> 00:45:25.445
- "i shouldn't have brought her.
00:45:25.445 --> 00:45:26.814
I made a mistake, and we shouldn't have come."
00:45:26.814 --> 00:45:29.783
And i just remember, i just,
00:45:30.384 --> 00:45:33.053
Just gutted me as a mom.
00:45:33.053 --> 00:45:34.521
- yeah. - and i said,
00:45:34.521 --> 00:45:36.290
"cody, god knew jesse was going to be born
00:45:36.290 --> 00:45:40.427
In jerusalem today,
00:45:40.427 --> 00:45:42.696
And we all just had to get here."
00:45:42.696 --> 00:45:45.332
And i said, "we can't look at this any other way
00:45:46.333 --> 00:45:48.936
Because god is the giver of life.
00:45:48.936 --> 00:45:52.639
He is the one who controls life and death in his hand.
00:45:52.639 --> 00:45:57.044
And i have to have faith in that
00:45:57.044 --> 00:45:59.613
So that we can get through this
00:45:59.613 --> 00:46:01.949
Because this is not a surprise to god."
00:46:01.949 --> 00:46:04.685
- yeah. - he knows.
00:46:04.685 --> 00:46:06.453
- yeah. - and he can calm
00:46:06.453 --> 00:46:08.689
The sailor. - yeah. so good.
00:46:09.323 --> 00:46:11.258
- the one that's going through it,
00:46:11.258 --> 00:46:12.793
His grace is sufficient for us.
00:46:12.793 --> 00:46:16.363
And sometimes you look at people
00:46:16.363 --> 00:46:18.365
That have gone through things, and i don't want to,
00:46:18.365 --> 00:46:20.567
I want to gain every bit of everything
00:46:20.567 --> 00:46:25.839
Kalley has ever gone through.
00:46:26.473 --> 00:46:27.441
I don't want to go through it,
00:46:27.441 --> 00:46:29.710
But i want to glean.
00:46:29.710 --> 00:46:30.944
And i think that's what's so beautiful,
00:46:30.944 --> 00:46:32.613
Even about better together,
00:46:32.613 --> 00:46:33.747
Is we can share these testimonies
00:46:33.747 --> 00:46:35.983
And i can glean from what sheila has learned,
00:46:35.983 --> 00:46:39.286
And from what you've come through,
00:46:39.286 --> 00:46:40.888
And what y'all have gone through.
00:46:40.888 --> 00:46:42.556
And we can take that and we can get a revelation of our own.
00:46:42.556 --> 00:46:46.426
And god can use our testimonies
00:46:46.426 --> 00:46:49.096
Because through our testimonies is where we're healed.
00:46:49.096 --> 00:46:52.766
And i just think it's a beautiful, beautiful thing.
00:46:53.800 --> 00:46:56.570
And i love and i admire you more
00:46:56.570 --> 00:46:59.706
Than i could ever say, she knows it.
00:46:59.706 --> 00:47:02.776
But for going through the stuff, the hard stuff,
00:47:02.776 --> 00:47:06.880
And coming out pure gold.
00:47:06.880 --> 00:47:09.983
- yes.
00:47:09.983 --> 00:47:11.618
- you know? and it is a walk
00:47:11.618 --> 00:47:14.021
And a beautiful life of faith that we get to do.
00:47:14.021 --> 00:47:17.724
And thank you for showing us how to do it, kalley.
00:47:17.724 --> 00:47:21.728
Thank you for hanging in there
00:47:21.728 --> 00:47:23.964
And doing the hard stuff, and for going through it
00:47:23.964 --> 00:47:28.068
And believing steadfast in your faith.
00:47:28.068 --> 00:47:32.139
- and i think that that's the verse that you
00:47:32.139 --> 00:47:35.609
Have shown us walked out,
00:47:36.176 --> 00:47:37.778
Where david says, at the end of 27,
00:47:37.778 --> 00:47:40.080
"i believe i will live to see the goodness of the lord
00:47:40.080 --> 00:47:46.219
In the land of the living."
00:47:46.820 --> 00:47:49.089
Let's just pray that for all of us.
00:47:49.089 --> 00:47:50.590
- yes. - thank you, jesus.
00:47:50.590 --> 00:47:52.859
- father, we know that we don't understand all your ways,
00:47:52.859 --> 00:47:57.297
But we are in wonder at your ways.
00:47:58.065 --> 00:48:01.068
Even just the five of us sitting here,
00:48:01.068 --> 00:48:03.870
The way that we have seen the different colors
00:48:03.870 --> 00:48:05.906
Of your character, the different beauty,
00:48:05.906 --> 00:48:08.875
The different kindness, the mercy,
00:48:08.875 --> 00:48:11.979
The strength when you don't have an ounce of strength left,
00:48:13.146 --> 00:48:16.516
Or just as sisters here,
00:48:17.017 --> 00:48:18.585
We want to pray for every single person right now
00:48:18.585 --> 00:48:21.888
Who is watching, who's listening.
00:48:21.888 --> 00:48:24.057
Lord, you know exactly where they are.
00:48:24.891 --> 00:48:27.828
Before they were even in their mother's womb,
00:48:27.828 --> 00:48:30.430
You knew them.
00:48:30.430 --> 00:48:31.531
You dedicated them before they were
00:48:31.531 --> 00:48:33.300
Ever dedicated in any church.
00:48:33.300 --> 00:48:35.635
So as we just pray right now, lord,
00:48:36.370 --> 00:48:38.038
For the faith that would look up and see you.
00:48:38.038 --> 00:48:42.809
Even in the darkest valley,
00:48:42.809 --> 00:48:45.479
I will not be afraid,
00:48:45.479 --> 00:48:48.048
For you are with me.
00:48:48.048 --> 00:48:51.284
And we thank you for your presence,
00:48:52.019 --> 00:48:53.720
And we thank you for your grace and your mercy.
00:48:53.720 --> 00:48:58.025
And we want to just tell you, we love you
00:48:58.025 --> 00:49:01.928
Because of jesus.
00:49:02.362 --> 00:49:04.798
Amen.
00:49:05.032 --> 00:49:06.066
- amen.
00:49:06.066 --> 00:49:06.900
(gentle music)
00:49:06.900 --> 00:49:08.969
- [announcer] connect with us on social media
00:49:08.969 --> 00:49:10.570
And let us know how our team can pray for you.
00:49:10.570 --> 00:49:13.206
(tender music)
00:49:13.206 --> 00:49:18.979
- okay, friends, we're answering some questions
00:49:19.913 --> 00:49:21.982
Behind the scenes at better together.
00:49:21.982 --> 00:49:24.284
Thank you for sending them in.
00:49:24.284 --> 00:49:25.552
- that's right. in fact, we have a question
00:49:25.552 --> 00:49:27.087
From denean, and she asked, "in addition to the bible,
00:49:27.087 --> 00:49:30.323
What books would y'all recommend
00:49:30.323 --> 00:49:31.858
About how to find your identity in christ?"
00:49:31.858 --> 00:49:34.861
- okay, well, you are correct.
00:49:34.861 --> 00:49:36.496
Bible is number one.
00:49:36.496 --> 00:49:37.464
10 out of 10, no notes.
00:49:37.464 --> 00:49:39.499
But a couple of other ones come to mind.
00:49:39.499 --> 00:49:41.001
So i've written a book on identity.
00:49:41.001 --> 00:49:42.769
It's called, "you are more than you've been told."
00:49:42.769 --> 00:49:45.639
It's to help you overcome to lies that you believe,
00:49:45.639 --> 00:49:49.076
The ones that other people have said about you.
00:49:49.076 --> 00:49:51.111
And it also gives rhythms of how to constantly live
00:49:51.111 --> 00:49:53.613
As who you are throughout your life.
00:49:53.613 --> 00:49:55.582
I also wrote the spoken word poem
00:49:55.582 --> 00:49:56.750
Called "i have a new name."
00:49:56.750 --> 00:49:58.085
You can stream for free on youtube.
00:49:58.085 --> 00:49:59.886
Here's a couple other ones.
00:49:59.886 --> 00:50:01.421
Priscilla shirer wrote a book called "i surrender all,"
00:50:01.421 --> 00:50:03.857
Which is on identity and surrendering and
00:50:03.857 --> 00:50:06.093
Abiding in christ.
00:50:06.093 --> 00:50:08.795
Lisa bevere wrote a book called "without rival,"
00:50:08.795 --> 00:50:11.098
That's specifically for women
00:50:11.098 --> 00:50:12.799
Knowing that they are a daughter,
00:50:12.799 --> 00:50:14.901
They are a child of god,
00:50:14.901 --> 00:50:17.037
They are a woman called by god. "without rival."
00:50:17.037 --> 00:50:20.807
And then, finally, if you have some deep wounds in your past
00:50:20.807 --> 00:50:24.911
And some more complicated names
00:50:24.911 --> 00:50:27.380
Than maybe other people in your life might have,
00:50:27.380 --> 00:50:30.283
I would suggest "the garden within" by dr. anita phillips.
00:50:30.283 --> 00:50:33.553
It will help excavate, you know, pain, shame.
00:50:33.553 --> 00:50:37.057
It's beautiful. so those are the four we're going to do.
00:50:37.057 --> 00:50:39.326
- awesome, awesome.
00:50:39.326 --> 00:50:40.994
- [announcer] stream full episodes
00:50:41.761 --> 00:50:43.096
Of better together on demand.
00:50:43.096 --> 00:50:45.465
Go to bettertogether.tv
00:50:45.465 --> 00:50:47.267
To stream all of our latest conversations.
00:50:47.267 --> 00:50:50.504
(bright music)
00:50:50.871 --> 00:50:50.871

Your Anchor in Life's Storms - Episode 1098

September 24, 2025 | S7 E1098 | 52:34

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