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Dr. Robert Jeffress | Robert Jeffress - How Can I Know How To Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt Me? | January 21, 2025
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- ♪♪♪
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- Male announcer: from the pulpit of the first baptist church
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- Of dallas, texas, this is "pathway to victory,"
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- With dr. robert jeffress.
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- Dr. robert jeffress: hi, i'm robert jeffress and welcome,
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- Again, to "pathway to victory."
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- In theory, most of us would extol the virtues of
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- Forgiveness, but unless you've personally experienced the pain
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- Of a prodigal child, or a dishonest business partner, or a
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- Cheating mate, it's hard to know what it truly means to forgive.
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- Well, whether you've been hurt in big ways or small, i invite
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- You to join me for this next half-hour as we discover the
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- Physical, emotional, and spiritual benefits
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- Of forgiveness.
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- We're answering the question, "how can i know how to forgive
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- Someone who has hurt me?"
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- On today's edition of "pathway to victory."
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- ♪♪♪
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- Announcer: it's okay to have questions about your faith,
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- But you need answers you can trust.
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- In his book "how can i know?"
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- Dr. robert jeffress addresses seven of life's
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- Most important questions.
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- If you've ever wondered how you can know the bible is true or
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- How you can know if you're going to heaven,
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- This book makes a compelling case for answers you
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- Can embrace with confidence.
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- Request your copy of "how can i know?"
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- When you give a generous gift to support the ministry
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- Of pathway to victory.
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- Jeffress: c.s. lewis once said, "forgiveness is a beautiful word
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- Until you have somebody to forgive."
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- We all like the concept, the practice of it, maybe not
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- So much.
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- I think, right now, when i talk about forgiveness, somebody
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- Comes to mind that has wronged you, that you know you
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- Should forgive.
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- And maybe an employer who has mistreated you.
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- It may be a mate who abandoned you.
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- It may be a parent who has neglected you.
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- You know you're supposed to forgive, but in the back of your
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- Mind, you're not sure you even should forgive.
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- I mean, after all, doesn't justice demand that wrongs
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- Be punished?
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- In my experience as a pastor, there is no decision that is
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- More crucial to our well-being than the choice to forgive.
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- Author david augsberger says it this way, "forgiveness is hard,
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- It hurts, and it costs."
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- But not forgiving is even more costly.
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- We're in a series, right now, entitled, "how can i know?
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- Answers to life's seven most important questions," and today,
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- We've come to the most practical of the questions we've looked at
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- So far, and that is: how can i know how to forgive someone who
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- Has hurt me?
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- You know, it's interesting, the subject of forgiveness, until
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- Fairly recently was, relegated to sunday school classes.
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- I mean, people thought of the idea of "forgive one another"
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- Kind of like they do, "turn the other cheek."
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- It was a platitude that was universally accepted and
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- Universally ignored.
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- "oh, that stuff works in church, maybe, but not in the real
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- World, where i live, forgive?"
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- And yet, in recent years, researchers have discovered
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- There are practical benefits to choosing to forgive.
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- For example, there are physical benefits.
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- There are health benefits to forgiving.
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- In fact, bitterness, unforgiveness, has now been
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- Directly linked to cardiovascular disease, to
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- Hypertension, even to cancer.
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- There are physical benefits to forgiving.
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- There are emotional benefits of forgiving.
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- When we refuse to forgive other people and, instead, rehearse
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- That offense over and over in our mind, we are reliving that
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- Pain and re-experiencing that pain.
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- No, forgiveness is letting go.
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- It's kind of like letting go of a rattlesnake.
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- You know, if you let go of a rattlesnake, it benefits the
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- Snake, but it benefits you more.
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- Forgiveness is the way we let go of the past, but the physical
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- And emotional benefits of forgiveness pale in comparison
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- To the spiritual benefits of forgiveness.
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- Jesus said it very matter of factly, very forcefully, in
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- Matthew 6:14 to 15, he said, "for if you forgive others for
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- Their transgressions, your heavenly father will also
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- Forgive you.
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- But if you do not forgive others, then your father will
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- Not forgive your transgressions."
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- Jesus couldn't have been any more clear.
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- There's an inseparable link between receiving god's
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- Forgiveness and extending forgiveness to other people.
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- If you don't extend forgiveness to others, god will not
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- Forgive you.
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- There's a link between receiving and giving forgiveness.
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- Well, jesus told this story to tell why we're to
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- Forgive others.
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- You remember this story, it's about a king who had a slave who
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- Owed him 10,000 talents, and so he called in the slave and said,
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- "i want my money and i want it now."
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- And the slave said, "well, i don't have the money right now,
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- On me, $16 billion, but be patient and i will repay
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- You everything!"
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- And the king, the bible says, matthew 18:27,
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- "felt compassion."
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- He felt compassion, he didn't usually feel compassion.
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- But as he saw that slave bowing before him, begging leniency,
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- Saying, "i'll repay you if you'll give me some compassion,"
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- The king released him and forgave him of the debt.
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- That's what forgiveness is, it is letting go of a debt.
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- That slave was so relieved he left the palace that day,
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- Rehearsing over in his mind what the king had said,
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- "you're forgiven.
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- You're forgiven, your debt is forgiven."
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- And that slave, as he thought that over, said, "hey, you
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- Know what?
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- Come to think of it, there's somebody who owes me
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- Some money."
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- And jesus said he went out and found a fellow slave who owed
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- Him 100 denarii.
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- Now denarius was about 16 cents, one day's wage.
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- So 100 denarii would be $16.
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- He went out and found this friend of his, a fellow slave
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- Who owed him $16, he grabbed him by the neck and began to choke
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- Him, saying, "repay me everything you owe me!"
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- And the slave couldn't repay the $16, so the first slave had his
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- Fellow slave thrown into prison until he should
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- Repay everything.
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- When the king heard what this first slave had done, he
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- Was outraged.
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- He called him in, verse 32, and said, "'you wicked slave, i
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- Forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me.
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- Should you not have also had mercy on your fellow slave, in
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- The same way that i had mercy on you?'
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- And his lord, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers
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- Until he should repay all that was owed him."
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- And then, jesus adds the zinger in verse 35, "so shall my
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- Heavenly father do to each of you, if you do not forgive your
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- Brother from the heart."
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- I think what he is saying is, if you find it impossible to
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- Forgive another person and refuse to forgive them, it's not
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- Because you haven't earned salvation, it's not because you
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- Lose salvation, it's because you never had it to begin with.
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- Because when you understand the tremendous debt that god has
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- Forgiven you of, you'll find it relatively easy to forgive
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- Other people.
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- Listen to me this morning, especially those of
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- You watching.
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- God's not asking you to deny the hurt that you've experienced.
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- That hurt is real, but he said, "whenever you are hurt by
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- Another person, keep that wrong in perspective, because the
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- Difference between how much somebody has hurt you and how
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- Much you have hurt god is the difference between $16 and $16
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- Billion dollars."
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- Forgiveness is the obligation of those who have been forgiven.
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- It's important for our physical, emotional, and our
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- Spiritual well-being.
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- So then, why do people have trouble forgiving?
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- If we know what's good for us, both now and for eternity, why
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- Do we have trouble forgiving others?
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- You know, people wonder sometimes why i talk so much
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- About forgiveness.
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- Is it because i have some big hurt in my life that i'm trying
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- To recover from?
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- No, not at all.
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- But i know how much the bible speaks about it, and i also know
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- The downside of not forgiving, having witnessed it in people
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- For many, many years.
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- And one reason people have difficulty forgiving is they
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- Don't understand what it is and what it isn't.
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- For example, forgiveness is not ignoring or
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- Rationalizing offenses.
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- One reason people find it difficult to forgive is they
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- Think, "well, isn't that diminishing the seriousness of
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- What was done to me?
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- Isn't that rationalizing it?"
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- Not at all.
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- In fact, just the opposite.
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- Remember this, you can only forgive people you're willing
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- To blame.
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- You know, you see that illustrated in the life story
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- Of joseph.
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- Remember joseph from the old testament?
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- He was sold into slavery by his 11 brothers and, through a
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- Miraculous set of circumstances, joseph ended up as the prime
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- Minister of egypt and was in a position to sell grain to his
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- Brothers who approached him, not knowing who he was.
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- And when he confronted his brothers, remember his words
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- To them?
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- He said, "and as for you," genesis 50:20, "as for you, you
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- Meant evil against me, but god used it for good to bring about
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- This current situation to keep these people alive."
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- Secondly, forgiveness is not surrendering our desire
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- For justice.
- 00:10:41.397 --> 00:10:42.765
- Romans 12:19, "never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave
- 00:10:42.765 --> 00:10:47.636
- Room for the wrath of god, for it is written, 'vengeance is
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- Mine, i will repay,' says the lord."
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- We're to give up our desire to settle the score, to hurt others
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- For hurting us, but we can never give up our desire for justice.
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- What is justice?
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- Justice is the payment god or others might demand from those
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- Who have hurt us.
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- We can give up vengeance, we can never give up justice.
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- We don't want to give up justice.
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- We're created in the image of a just god.
- 00:11:16.966 --> 00:11:20.636
- The reason we want people to pay for what they've done is not
- 00:11:20.636 --> 00:11:24.507
- Because we're unlike god, it's because we're like god.
- 00:11:24.507 --> 00:11:28.043
- Listen to psalm 82, verse 3. "vindicate the weak and the
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- Fatherless; do justice to the afflicted and the destitute.
- 00:11:31.881 --> 00:11:36.685
- Learn to do good; seek justice, reprove the ruthless."
- 00:11:36.685 --> 00:11:40.756
- Isaiah 1:17 says, "i give up my desire for vengeance.
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- I don't give up my desire for justice."
- 00:11:46.128 --> 00:11:49.198
- Justice is letting god settle the score.
- 00:11:49.198 --> 00:11:52.434
- By the way, one way god settles the score is through government,
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- Through the legal system.
- 00:11:56.839 --> 00:11:58.607
- That's why capitol punishment is something god commands.
- 00:11:58.607 --> 00:12:01.710
- It's his way of exacting justice.
- 00:12:01.710 --> 00:12:04.313
- In romans 13, verse 4, paul said, "government is a minister
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- Of god, an avenger who brings wrath on the one who
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- Practices evil."
- 00:12:13.656 --> 00:12:15.691
- The reason this is important to understand is, a lot of people
- 00:12:15.691 --> 00:12:19.595
- Don't forgive because they think, "well, if i forgive, i'm
- 00:12:19.595 --> 00:12:23.165
- Surrendering my desire for justice."
- 00:12:23.165 --> 00:12:25.835
- No, not at all.
- 00:12:25.835 --> 00:12:27.236
- Thirdly, forgiveness is not forgetting offenses.
- 00:12:27.236 --> 00:12:31.807
- He no longer holds our sin against us, why?
- 00:12:31.807 --> 00:12:35.077
- It's not because he's overlooked our sin.
- 00:12:35.077 --> 00:12:37.213
- A lot of people think, well, god forgiving means he just plays
- 00:12:37.213 --> 00:12:40.115
- Like it never happened, he overlooks it.
- 00:12:40.115 --> 00:12:42.551
- A holy god cannot do that.
- 00:12:42.551 --> 00:12:44.286
- The old testament says, "god cannot overlook the sins of
- 00:12:44.286 --> 00:12:47.723
- The unrighteous."
- 00:12:47.723 --> 00:12:49.491
- No, what god does to our sin is he marks our sin "paid in full."
- 00:12:49.491 --> 00:12:56.332
- That's exactly what happened on the cross of jesus christ.
- 00:12:56.332 --> 00:13:00.135
- Remember paul's words in colossians 2, verses 13 and 14,
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- "god, having forgiven us of all of our transgressions, having
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- Canceled out the certificate of debt consisting of decrees
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- Against us, which were hostile to us; he has taken it out of
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- The way, having nailed it to the cross."
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- Look, god is holy, he is just.
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- He cannot overlook sin.
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- Somebody has to pay for my sin, and that someone who's paid is
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- Jesus christ.
- 00:13:29.031 --> 00:13:30.399
- In paul's day, if you were put into prison, above your prison
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- Cell was listed a certificate of debt showing the offenses you
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- Committed that landed you in prison.
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- We have a certificate of debt, things we have done deserving of
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- God's punishment, but when we trust in jesus to be our savior,
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- The bible says god takes that certificate of debt that lists
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- All of our offenses, and what did god do with it?
- 00:13:53.122 --> 00:13:55.791
- "he nailed it to the cross of jesus christ."
- 00:13:55.791 --> 00:13:59.061
- Remember what jesus said in the cross?
- 00:13:59.061 --> 00:14:01.363
- "it is finished," literally "tetelestai" in greek, "paid
- 00:14:01.363 --> 00:14:06.936
- In full."
- 00:14:06.936 --> 00:14:10.039
- No, forgiveness is not about forgetting, we can't forget.
- 00:14:10.039 --> 00:14:15.177
- Fourth, forgiveness is not about reconciling with other people,
- 00:14:15.177 --> 00:14:20.482
- And this is what trips a lot of people up.
- 00:14:20.482 --> 00:14:23.285
- They think forgiveness always results in reconciliation.
- 00:14:23.285 --> 00:14:27.189
- And, "if i have to be reconciled to that numbskull, i am not
- 00:14:27.189 --> 00:14:31.260
- Gonna forgive them."
- 00:14:31.260 --> 00:14:33.128
- I mean, seriously, here's a woman who's been physically
- 00:14:33.128 --> 00:14:36.865
- Abused by her husband, and rightly, she moves out of the
- 00:14:36.865 --> 00:14:40.836
- House to protect herself or her children.
- 00:14:40.836 --> 00:14:44.540
- And she hears some pastor talking about forgiveness, and
- 00:14:44.540 --> 00:14:48.477
- She thinks, "i can forgive him, but does that mean i have to
- 00:14:48.477 --> 00:14:52.047
- Move back into the house and threaten my own life or the life
- 00:14:52.047 --> 00:14:55.818
- Of my children?"
- 00:14:55.818 --> 00:14:57.186
- You can understand why she would be reluctant to do that.
- 00:14:57.186 --> 00:15:00.856
- But forgiveness and reconciliation are not the
- 00:15:00.856 --> 00:15:03.425
- Same thing.
- 00:15:03.425 --> 00:15:04.793
- Forgiveness has no strings attached to it.
- 00:15:04.793 --> 00:15:07.296
- Reconciliation has a number of strings attached to it.
- 00:15:07.296 --> 00:15:12.167
- In summary, remember these differences between forgiveness
- 00:15:12.167 --> 00:15:15.437
- And reconciliation: forgiveness has no conditions,
- 00:15:15.437 --> 00:15:19.742
- Reconciliation has several conditions.
- 00:15:19.742 --> 00:15:23.312
- Secondly, forgiveness can be offered to those who never admit
- 00:15:23.312 --> 00:15:26.582
- They're wrong.
- 00:15:26.582 --> 00:15:27.950
- Reconciliation can be offered only to those who admit
- 00:15:27.950 --> 00:15:31.253
- They're wrong.
- 00:15:31.253 --> 00:15:32.788
- Thirdly, forgiveness depends upon me, but reconciliation
- 00:15:32.788 --> 00:15:37.760
- Depends upon us.
- 00:15:37.760 --> 00:15:40.329
- "well, you've talked about what forgiveness isn't, what is
- 00:15:40.329 --> 00:15:43.999
- Authentic forgiveness?"
- 00:15:43.999 --> 00:15:47.136
- I grew up hearing my parents argue, occasionally.
- 00:15:47.136 --> 00:15:51.607
- Did you ever have parents who argued?
- 00:15:51.607 --> 00:15:54.143
- And a source of argument with my parents was money.
- 00:15:54.143 --> 00:15:57.813
- Have you ever noticed, in a marriage, there was usually a
- 00:15:57.813 --> 00:16:00.049
- Spender and a saver, and they get unequally yoked together,
- 00:16:00.049 --> 00:16:04.520
- Sometimes, and there's friction.
- 00:16:04.520 --> 00:16:05.921
- And i remember hearing my dad say to my mom, "if you keep on
- 00:16:05.921 --> 00:16:09.792
- Spending, you're gonna spend us into the poor house."
- 00:16:09.792 --> 00:16:13.996
- Now, i remember, as a little boy, wondering what a
- 00:16:13.996 --> 00:16:16.465
- "poorhouse" was.
- 00:16:16.465 --> 00:16:18.233
- I've never seen a poorhouse, i couldn't imagine what it was
- 00:16:18.233 --> 00:16:21.503
- Like, but i sure knew i never wanted to go there, to
- 00:16:21.503 --> 00:16:24.273
- A poorhouse.
- 00:16:24.273 --> 00:16:25.774
- Well, what a poorhouse was, what my dad was alluding to, was
- 00:16:25.774 --> 00:16:29.178
- Something that existed hundreds of years before, called "the
- 00:16:29.178 --> 00:16:33.549
- Debtor's prison."
- 00:16:33.549 --> 00:16:35.317
- There was a time in our country's history that, if you
- 00:16:35.317 --> 00:16:37.820
- Couldn't pay your bills, you went to prison.
- 00:16:37.820 --> 00:16:40.355
- That really didn't make a lot of sense, to go to a debtor's
- 00:16:40.355 --> 00:16:43.425
- Prison, because a person who goes to a debtor prison, he
- 00:16:43.425 --> 00:16:47.062
- Can't earn any money in the prison, so he ends up
- 00:16:47.062 --> 00:16:50.666
- Dying there.
- 00:16:50.666 --> 00:16:52.034
- He can't support his family while he's in prison, so
- 00:16:52.034 --> 00:16:54.303
- They starve.
- 00:16:54.303 --> 00:16:55.671
- And if that's not enough, the person who holds the debt, goes
- 00:16:55.671 --> 00:16:58.307
- Unpaid, because there's no money to give to him.
- 00:16:58.307 --> 00:17:02.010
- That is, i think, an unspoken motivation for why that king
- 00:17:02.010 --> 00:17:07.483
- Forgave that $16 billion debt.
- 00:17:07.483 --> 00:17:11.186
- Why not have that slave thrown into debtor's prison?
- 00:17:11.186 --> 00:17:15.591
- Because he knew he had an account receivable that
- 00:17:15.591 --> 00:17:18.994
- Was worthless.
- 00:17:18.994 --> 00:17:20.462
- He knew that that slave could never pay him the $16 billion
- 00:17:20.462 --> 00:17:24.700
- And, if he threw him into prison, he would never be able
- 00:17:24.700 --> 00:17:27.769
- To repay him.
- 00:17:27.769 --> 00:17:30.606
- So what did he do?
- 00:17:30.606 --> 00:17:32.141
- Again, verse 27 of matthew 18 says, "the lord of that slave
- 00:17:32.141 --> 00:17:36.378
- Felt compassion and released him and forgave him of the debt."
- 00:17:36.378 --> 00:17:41.850
- And there you see the three components of
- 00:17:41.850 --> 00:17:44.219
- Authentic forgiveness.
- 00:17:44.219 --> 00:17:45.921
- Quickly, genuine forgiveness acknowledges the offense.
- 00:17:45.921 --> 00:17:51.493
- Notice, twice in this parable, you hear the word "owed."
- 00:17:51.493 --> 00:17:55.364
- The slave owed the king.
- 00:17:55.364 --> 00:17:58.500
- The second slave owed the first slave.
- 00:17:58.500 --> 00:18:02.938
- This wasn't an imaginary debt, this was a very real debt that
- 00:18:02.938 --> 00:18:06.675
- Was owed.
- 00:18:06.675 --> 00:18:08.010
- Remember, you can't forgive those you're not willing
- 00:18:08.010 --> 00:18:10.345
- To blame.
- 00:18:10.345 --> 00:18:11.713
- Secondly, genuine forgiveness calculates the debt.
- 00:18:11.713 --> 00:18:15.250
- It not only acknowledges the debt, it calculates the debt.
- 00:18:15.250 --> 00:18:19.821
- Before we can forgive somebody, we need to know exactly what
- 00:18:19.821 --> 00:18:23.225
- We're forgiving them of.
- 00:18:23.225 --> 00:18:26.028
- For example, joseph said to his brothers, "come near and do
- 00:18:26.028 --> 00:18:32.301
- Not fear."
- 00:18:32.301 --> 00:18:34.036
- Why did he say "don't fear?"
- 00:18:34.036 --> 00:18:35.604
- Because they had every right to fear, they deserved to lose
- 00:18:35.604 --> 00:18:38.273
- Their life over what had happened.
- 00:18:38.273 --> 00:18:41.276
- The same way with your offender, determine what they owe for what
- 00:18:41.276 --> 00:18:45.814
- They've done to you.
- 00:18:45.814 --> 00:18:47.182
- They might deserve divorce, they might deserve prison, they may
- 00:18:47.182 --> 00:18:51.853
- Deserve even death.
- 00:18:51.853 --> 00:18:53.855
- But you can't forgive a debt until you calculate what that
- 00:18:53.855 --> 00:18:57.893
- Debt is.
- 00:18:57.893 --> 00:18:59.228
- In jesus's parable, it was a specific debt, 10,000 talents,
- 00:18:59.228 --> 00:19:03.131
- 100 denarii.
- 00:19:03.131 --> 00:19:04.933
- Figure out what the person owes you before you forgive them.
- 00:19:04.933 --> 00:19:09.037
- Genuine forgiveness calculates the debt.
- 00:19:09.037 --> 00:19:11.773
- And thirdly, genuine forgiveness releases our debtor to god.
- 00:19:11.773 --> 00:19:18.180
- Remember that first slave?
- 00:19:18.180 --> 00:19:20.115
- He found the guy who owed him $16 and what he did-- what did
- 00:19:20.115 --> 00:19:23.952
- He do?
- 00:19:23.952 --> 00:19:25.287
- He grabbed him, choked him, and would not let him go.
- 00:19:25.287 --> 00:19:30.726
- Perfect picture of unforgiveness.
- 00:19:30.726 --> 00:19:33.061
- Unforgiveness refuses to let go.
- 00:19:33.061 --> 00:19:37.366
- You know, the question i'm asked most often about forgiveness is
- 00:19:37.366 --> 00:19:41.436
- This, "can i forgive somebody who never says, 'i'm sorry,' who
- 00:19:41.436 --> 00:19:46.475
- Never asked for my forgiveness?"
- 00:19:46.475 --> 00:19:48.844
- And the answer is "yes," not only can you, you must.
- 00:19:48.844 --> 00:19:53.415
- Jesus said, in mark 11:25, "whenever you stand praying,
- 00:19:53.415 --> 00:19:59.087
- Forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your
- 00:19:59.087 --> 00:20:02.891
- Father who is in heaven might forgive you of
- 00:20:02.891 --> 00:20:05.894
- Your transgressions."
- 00:20:05.894 --> 00:20:07.629
- Now, some people get this mixed up with jesus's words in matthew
- 00:20:07.629 --> 00:20:11.433
- 6, another passage, in which he says, "if you're worshiping and
- 00:20:11.433 --> 00:20:15.003
- You remember that your brother has something against you, leave
- 00:20:15.003 --> 00:20:20.108
- Your sacrifice, leave the worship service, go out and be
- 00:20:20.108 --> 00:20:23.412
- Reconciled to your brother."
- 00:20:23.412 --> 00:20:25.180
- But that's not the case he's talking about mark 11.
- 00:20:25.180 --> 00:20:27.783
- He's saying you're singing a hymn in church, or you're
- 00:20:27.783 --> 00:20:30.686
- Listening to the pastor talk about forgiveness, and you
- 00:20:30.686 --> 00:20:33.655
- Suddenly remember you've got something against somebody else.
- 00:20:33.655 --> 00:20:38.260
- What are you supposed to do?
- 00:20:38.260 --> 00:20:40.595
- You don't walk out of the church.
- 00:20:40.595 --> 00:20:43.865
- Right there in your pew, you let go of it.
- 00:20:43.865 --> 00:20:47.569
- You forgive your brother or sister.
- 00:20:47.569 --> 00:20:50.772
- You don't have to have a conversation with them.
- 00:20:50.772 --> 00:20:53.108
- You don't have to confront them.
- 00:20:53.108 --> 00:20:55.210
- They may be not even living close by.
- 00:20:55.210 --> 00:20:58.313
- They could be in another city, state, country, or they may be
- 00:20:58.313 --> 00:21:01.483
- In the cemetery.
- 00:21:01.483 --> 00:21:03.385
- But you don't need them.
- 00:21:03.385 --> 00:21:04.753
- You can unilaterally forgive.
- 00:21:04.753 --> 00:21:08.757
- "why should i do that?"
- 00:21:08.757 --> 00:21:10.659
- Because of the consequences of not forgiving.
- 00:21:10.659 --> 00:21:13.295
- You will never be free from that hurt until you separate yourself
- 00:21:13.295 --> 00:21:18.633
- From it.
- 00:21:18.633 --> 00:21:19.968
- You know, often think of the analogy of a three-legged race.
- 00:21:19.968 --> 00:21:23.739
- Have you ever been to one of those old town-- old timey
- 00:21:23.739 --> 00:21:27.943
- Picnics, old fashioned picnics, and seen the three-legged race?
- 00:21:27.943 --> 00:21:32.748
- You voluntarily tie your leg to the leg of your partner and,
- 00:21:32.748 --> 00:21:37.552
- Together, you hobble toward the finish line and people laugh
- 00:21:37.552 --> 00:21:41.289
- Because it's so ludicrous.
- 00:21:41.289 --> 00:21:43.325
- And if you've ever done one of those three-legged races, you
- 00:21:43.325 --> 00:21:46.928
- Probably had the same sensation i have, you know, "if only i
- 00:21:46.928 --> 00:21:50.298
- Could get free from this idiot, i could go a lot faster and win
- 00:21:50.298 --> 00:21:54.336
- The contest."
- 00:21:54.336 --> 00:21:55.704
- But you see, three-legged races don't allow for solo contenders.
- 00:21:55.704 --> 00:22:01.009
- You can never travel any faster, or farther, than the person you
- 00:22:01.009 --> 00:22:05.313
- Are bound to.
- 00:22:05.313 --> 00:22:07.416
- When you refuse to forgive somebody, you're emotionally
- 00:22:07.416 --> 00:22:10.685
- Bound to that other person.
- 00:22:10.685 --> 00:22:13.221
- You can go no farther, or faster, in life than he or she
- 00:22:13.221 --> 00:22:17.058
- Is willing to go, when you make your forgiveness depending on
- 00:22:17.058 --> 00:22:20.762
- What they do.
- 00:22:20.762 --> 00:22:22.397
- But forgiveness is the way we separate ourselves from
- 00:22:22.397 --> 00:22:25.133
- Our offender.
- 00:22:25.133 --> 00:22:26.501
- It's a way that we say, "god, what this person did to me
- 00:22:26.501 --> 00:22:29.738
- Was wrong.
- 00:22:29.738 --> 00:22:31.106
- They deserve to pay for it, you deal with it.
- 00:22:31.106 --> 00:22:34.843
- I'm letting go so i can be free to get on with my life."
- 00:22:34.843 --> 00:22:41.550
- Lewis smedes said it best, "when we forgive, we set a prisoner
- 00:22:41.550 --> 00:22:47.722
- Free and the prisoner we set free is us."
- 00:22:47.722 --> 00:22:53.462
- ♪♪♪
- 00:22:53.462 --> 00:22:59.301
- Jeffress: in this moment of reflection, perhaps you've come
- 00:22:59.301 --> 00:23:01.970
- To realize that your offender has held you in bondage,
- 00:23:01.970 --> 00:23:05.540
- Long enough.
- 00:23:05.540 --> 00:23:06.975
- Release that offense and begin living in the freedom
- 00:23:06.975 --> 00:23:10.545
- God intended.
- 00:23:10.545 --> 00:23:12.614
- In closing, i wanna say a word of thanks to our valued "pathway
- 00:23:12.614 --> 00:23:16.551
- Partners," today.
- 00:23:16.551 --> 00:23:18.086
- This circle of friends give a generous gift every month, and
- 00:23:18.086 --> 00:23:22.224
- Their consistent gifts are reaping eternal rewards.
- 00:23:22.224 --> 00:23:26.161
- For example, i heard from a college student who said, "i was
- 00:23:26.161 --> 00:23:29.831
- Listening to a christian station as i was driving out of town
- 00:23:29.831 --> 00:23:33.768
- About an hour-and-a-half away.
- 00:23:33.768 --> 00:23:35.837
- I started to lose the signal, so i turned around and pulled over
- 00:23:35.837 --> 00:23:39.908
- So i could finish your message, and what i heard was
- 00:23:39.908 --> 00:23:43.144
- Truly beautiful.
- 00:23:43.144 --> 00:23:44.880
- I needed to hear in that moment what jesus was saying to me,
- 00:23:44.880 --> 00:23:49.251
- That he is the only way to salvation."
- 00:23:49.251 --> 00:23:51.720
- Well, thank you for that testimony.
- 00:23:52.687 --> 00:23:54.923
- And friends, thank you for your generous support of "pathway to
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- Victory" and thanks, especially, to our "pathway partners" who
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- Give a monthly gift to support the ministry of "pathway
- 00:24:02.464 --> 00:24:06.101
- To victory."
- 00:24:06.101 --> 00:24:07.435
- Now, please stay right there.
- 00:24:07.435 --> 00:24:08.803
- I'll be back with more in just a moment.
- 00:24:08.803 --> 00:24:11.640
- Announcer: if a friend or one of your children came up to you
- 00:24:12.941 --> 00:24:15.410
- And asked, "how do you know christianity
- 00:24:15.410 --> 00:24:17.612
- Is the right religion?"
- 00:24:17.612 --> 00:24:19.180
- Could you give a clear and credible answer?
- 00:24:19.180 --> 00:24:21.950
- We'd like to send you a book from dr. robert jeffress
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- Containing answers to life's seven most important questions.
- 00:24:24.753 --> 00:24:28.590
- It's titled "how can i know?"
- 00:24:28.590 --> 00:24:30.792
- Jeffress: if we're honest, every one of us has questions
- 00:24:30.792 --> 00:24:33.428
- About our faith, questions like:
- 00:24:33.428 --> 00:24:35.330
- How can i know the bible is true?
- 00:24:35.330 --> 00:24:37.699
- Or: how can i know god exists?
- 00:24:37.699 --> 00:24:40.435
- In my book "how can i know?"
- 00:24:40.435 --> 00:24:42.337
- I tackle seven important questions and provide
- 00:24:42.337 --> 00:24:45.440
- Biblically-based answers
- 00:24:45.440 --> 00:24:47.442
- You can embrace with confidence.
- 00:24:47.442 --> 00:24:49.611
- Announcer: seven straightforward answers
- 00:24:49.611 --> 00:24:51.212
- To seven pressing questions.
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- Is yours today when you give a generous gift to support the
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- Jeffress: it's not a sin to have doubts.
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- Sometimes doubt is a prerequisite to genuine faith.
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- Announcer: thank you for investing financially
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- Biblical teaching of god's word.
- 00:25:37.058 --> 00:25:39.361
- Jeffress: right now, it's possible you're thinking about a
- 00:25:42.664 --> 00:25:45.433
- Spouse, a parent, or a child who has wronged you.
- 00:25:45.433 --> 00:25:49.938
- Yes, what they did to you was wrong and hurtful, but because
- 00:25:49.938 --> 00:25:53.808
- We've experienced god's amazing forgiveness, we can release our
- 00:25:53.808 --> 00:25:58.246
- Pain and let god deal with our offender.
- 00:25:58.246 --> 00:26:01.750
- Well, as much as we try, every one of us makes mistakes.
- 00:26:01.750 --> 00:26:05.754
- So is there any way to recover from major blunders in our life?
- 00:26:05.754 --> 00:26:10.358
- Stay tuned for a preview of what's coming up next in our
- 00:26:10.358 --> 00:26:13.128
- Series, "how can i know?"
- 00:26:13.128 --> 00:26:16.364
- Jeffress: well, i've got some bad news and some good news
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- For you.
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- The bad news is, life has no rewind button on it.
- 00:26:21.202 --> 00:26:25.974
- You can't erase the past.
- 00:26:25.974 --> 00:26:28.209
- That's the bad news.
- 00:26:28.209 --> 00:26:29.844
- The good news is, your failure doesn't have to be the final
- 00:26:29.844 --> 00:26:33.882
- Chapter of your life.
- 00:26:33.882 --> 00:26:35.984
- God says you can have a new beginning.
- 00:26:35.984 --> 00:26:40.021
- Male announcer: set your dvr and join us, next time, for the
- 00:26:40.088 --> 00:26:42.490
- Message, "how can i know how to start over when i've blown it?"
- 00:26:42.490 --> 00:26:46.428
- Here on "pathway to victory."
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- Announcer: join dr. robert jeffress on
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- "pathway to victory's" journeys of paul mediterranean cruise.
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