M'Lisa Goff - Shattered Dreams

August 4, 2025 | S25 E804 | 29:15

The author of “It’s Not Beyond Hope” shares her journey of divorce, addiction, loss, and brokenness to show the power of God’s redemption and restoration.

#inActive #Author #Faith #Ministry #Giving #Visions/Dreams #Purpose #Choices #Actions

Closed captions

Show Timecode

Life Today with James Robison | M'Lisa Goff - Shattered Dreams | August 4, 2025

>> i actually just dove head-in to the world,
00:00:07.097 --> 00:00:10.400
And i just found myself in a very dark place.
00:00:10.400 --> 00:00:13.970
I found myself pregnant.
00:00:13.970 --> 00:00:17.540
I didn't even know who the father was.
00:00:17.540 --> 00:00:20.677
Here i had been a pastor's wife.
00:00:20.677 --> 00:00:23.279
I had been raised in church my whole life,
00:00:23.279 --> 00:00:25.515
And i thought, how did i get here?
00:00:25.515 --> 00:00:28.418
M'lisa goff shares her personal journey
00:00:28.418 --> 00:00:30.753
That reveals how our darkest moments can be transformed!
00:00:30.753 --> 00:00:34.724
Next!
00:00:34.724 --> 00:00:42.432
♪
00:00:42.665 --> 00:00:53.877
Tammy: hello, everybody.
00:00:53.977 --> 00:00:55.078
Tammy: hello, everybody. welcome to life today .
00:00:55.145 --> 00:00:56.279
Tammy: hello, everybody. welcome to life today . i'm tammy trent.
00:00:56.346 --> 00:00:57.413
Welcome to life today . i'm tammy trent. i'm so glad you're here.
00:00:57.480 --> 00:00:58.882
I'm tammy trent. i'm so glad you're here. i'm so glad you're here
00:00:58.948 --> 00:01:00.150
I'm so glad you're here. i'm so glad you're here with me again, blynda lane.
00:01:00.216 --> 00:01:01.451
I'm so glad you're here with me again, blynda lane. blynda lane,
00:01:01.518 --> 00:01:02.519
You've seen her on tv.
00:01:02.619 --> 00:01:03.820
You've seen her on tv. you're seeing her on tv now.
00:01:03.887 --> 00:01:05.388
You've seen her on tv. you're seeing her on tv now. and she's such a blessing!
00:01:05.455 --> 00:01:06.689
You're seeing her on tv now. and she's such a blessing! i'm glad you're here again
00:01:06.756 --> 00:01:07.991
And she's such a blessing! i'm glad you're here again with me.
00:01:08.057 --> 00:01:09.058
I'm glad you're here again with me. blynda: thank you, tammy.
00:01:09.125 --> 00:01:10.193
With me. blynda: thank you, tammy. i mean, it is just really
00:01:10.260 --> 00:01:11.427
Blynda: thank you, tammy. i mean, it is just really so fun to get to do this
00:01:11.494 --> 00:01:12.929
I mean, it is just really so fun to get to do this with you.
00:01:12.996 --> 00:01:14.063
So fun to get to do this with you. i'm telling you, i just want
00:01:14.130 --> 00:01:15.632
With you. i'm telling you, i just want to say you're really gifted.
00:01:15.698 --> 00:01:17.467
I'm telling you, i just want to say you're really gifted. the lord uses you
00:01:17.534 --> 00:01:18.535
To say you're really gifted. the lord uses you in really amazing ways.
00:01:18.601 --> 00:01:20.236
The lord uses you in really amazing ways. it's been an honor to get
00:01:20.303 --> 00:01:21.437
In really amazing ways. it's been an honor to get to be beside you
00:01:21.504 --> 00:01:22.539
It's been an honor to get to be beside you a couple of times.
00:01:22.605 --> 00:01:23.606
To be beside you a couple of times. really fun.
00:01:23.673 --> 00:01:24.674
A couple of times. really fun. and of course,
00:01:24.741 --> 00:01:25.842
Really fun. and of course, i love this ministry.
00:01:25.909 --> 00:01:27.010
And of course, i love this ministry. it's amazing to be a part
00:01:27.076 --> 00:01:28.411
I love this ministry. it's amazing to be a part of a ministry that
00:01:28.478 --> 00:01:29.746
It's amazing to be a part of a ministry that is changing so many lives
00:01:29.812 --> 00:01:30.780
Of a ministry that is changing so many lives around the world.
00:01:30.847 --> 00:01:31.881
Is changing so many lives around the world. tammy: you know, i think
00:01:31.948 --> 00:01:32.882
Around the world. tammy: you know, i think just what you said, it's
00:01:32.949 --> 00:01:33.917
Tammy: you know, i think just what you said, it's that sisterhood, especially.
00:01:33.983 --> 00:01:35.285
Just what you said, it's that sisterhood, especially. that means a lot.
00:01:35.351 --> 00:01:36.352
That sisterhood, especially. that means a lot. your words mean so much to me,
00:01:36.419 --> 00:01:37.687
That means a lot. your words mean so much to me, and i'm grateful for it.
00:01:37.754 --> 00:01:38.855
Your words mean so much to me, and i'm grateful for it. i think that's the beauty
00:01:38.922 --> 00:01:40.023
And i'm grateful for it. i think that's the beauty of sisters in christ,
00:01:40.089 --> 00:01:42.125
I think that's the beauty of sisters in christ, and the gift of friendship
00:01:42.192 --> 00:01:43.193
Of sisters in christ, and the gift of friendship and relationship.
00:01:43.259 --> 00:01:44.294
And the gift of friendship and relationship. we've only known each other
00:01:44.360 --> 00:01:45.361
And relationship. we've only known each other for a short, short time.
00:01:45.428 --> 00:01:46.429
We've only known each other for a short, short time. blynda: but it feels like
00:01:46.496 --> 00:01:47.530
For a short, short time. blynda: but it feels like a lot longer.
00:01:47.597 --> 00:01:48.631
Blynda: but it feels like a lot longer. tammy: i know it.
00:01:48.698 --> 00:01:49.699
A lot longer. tammy: i know it. i think that's
00:01:49.766 --> 00:01:50.733
Tammy: i know it. i think that's the spirit of god.
00:01:50.800 --> 00:01:51.734
I think that's the spirit of god. when you seek out
00:01:51.801 --> 00:01:52.869
The spirit of god. when you seek out relationships that are
00:01:52.936 --> 00:01:54.037
When you seek out relationships that are of jesus where you sharpen
00:01:54.103 --> 00:01:55.271
Relationships that are of jesus where you sharpen each other and you grow,
00:01:55.338 --> 00:01:56.472
Of jesus where you sharpen each other and you grow, that is the gift.
00:01:56.539 --> 00:01:57.574
Each other and you grow, that is the gift. you've been a gift to us.
00:01:57.640 --> 00:01:58.975
That is the gift. you've been a gift to us. and now, this ministry,
00:01:59.042 --> 00:02:00.410
You've been a gift to us. and now, this ministry, doing some shows with me.
00:02:00.476 --> 00:02:01.511
And now, this ministry, doing some shows with me. i'm grateful for you.
00:02:01.578 --> 00:02:02.579
Doing some shows with me. i'm grateful for you. and grateful for you!
00:02:02.645 --> 00:02:03.680
I'm grateful for you. and grateful for you! i'm glad you're watching.
00:02:03.746 --> 00:02:04.814
And grateful for you! i'm glad you're watching. but what happens when
00:02:04.881 --> 00:02:05.915
I'm glad you're watching. but what happens when your entire life shatters
00:02:05.982 --> 00:02:07.450
But what happens when your entire life shatters and falls apart, and
00:02:07.517 --> 00:02:08.985
Your entire life shatters and falls apart, and you wonder if it's too late
00:02:09.052 --> 00:02:10.053
And falls apart, and you wonder if it's too late for restoration?
00:02:10.119 --> 00:02:12.155
You wonder if it's too late for restoration? when pain from your past
00:02:12.222 --> 00:02:13.189
For restoration? when pain from your past collides with a present
00:02:13.256 --> 00:02:14.490
When pain from your past collides with a present that feels unrecognizable
00:02:14.557 --> 00:02:16.092
Collides with a present that feels unrecognizable and hope seems out of reach?
00:02:16.159 --> 00:02:19.028
That feels unrecognizable and hope seems out of reach? today's guest knows
00:02:19.095 --> 00:02:20.263
And hope seems out of reach? today's guest knows that feeling all too well.
00:02:20.330 --> 00:02:21.731
Today's guest knows that feeling all too well. she's lived through
00:02:21.798 --> 00:02:22.899
That feeling all too well. she's lived through heartbreak, loss,
00:02:22.966 --> 00:02:24.000
She's lived through heartbreak, loss, deep regret, but also
00:02:24.067 --> 00:02:26.502
Heartbreak, loss, deep regret, but also discovered the healing power
00:02:26.569 --> 00:02:27.837
Deep regret, but also discovered the healing power of god's grace.
00:02:27.904 --> 00:02:29.739
Discovered the healing power of god's grace. she's written a book
00:02:29.806 --> 00:02:30.807
Of god's grace. she's written a book all about it.
00:02:30.873 --> 00:02:31.908
She's written a book all about it. it's called
00:02:31.975 --> 00:02:33.109
All about it. it's called it's not beyond hope :
00:02:33.209 --> 00:02:34.244
It's called it's not beyond hope : "healing your shattered life."
00:02:34.310 --> 00:02:35.345
It's not beyond hope : "healing your shattered life." please welcome my friend,
00:02:35.411 --> 00:02:36.346
"healing your shattered life." please welcome my friend, m'lisa goff.
00:02:36.412 --> 00:02:37.480
Please welcome my friend, m'lisa goff. i'm so glad you're here.
00:02:37.547 --> 00:02:39.015
M'lisa goff. i'm so glad you're here. i've been waiting to have you
00:02:39.082 --> 00:02:40.583
I'm so glad you're here. i've been waiting to have you on the show to be able
00:02:40.650 --> 00:02:42.485
I've been waiting to have you on the show to be able to tell your story.
00:02:42.552 --> 00:02:43.519
On the show to be able to tell your story. it's crazy!
00:02:43.586 --> 00:02:44.587
To tell your story. it's crazy! there are so many --
00:02:44.654 --> 00:02:45.822
It's crazy! there are so many -- blynda: you know,
00:02:45.888 --> 00:02:46.889
There are so many -- blynda: you know, those stories that you hear
00:02:46.956 --> 00:02:48.124
Blynda: you know, those stories that you hear and you hear the story
00:02:48.191 --> 00:02:49.325
Those stories that you hear and you hear the story and you're like,
00:02:49.392 --> 00:02:50.393
And you hear the story and you're like, oh, you should write a book.
00:02:50.460 --> 00:02:51.861
And you're like, oh, you should write a book. you are the definition of:
00:02:51.928 --> 00:02:53.096
Oh, you should write a book. you are the definition of: you should write a book,
00:02:53.162 --> 00:02:54.297
You are the definition of: you should write a book, and you did!
00:02:54.364 --> 00:02:55.365
You should write a book, and you did! which is amazing!
00:02:55.431 --> 00:02:56.432
And you did! which is amazing! tammy: you could write a book.
00:02:56.499 --> 00:02:57.934
Which is amazing! tammy: you could write a book. this should be a movie.
00:02:58.001 --> 00:02:59.135
Tammy: you could write a book. this should be a movie. you don't want to miss
00:02:59.202 --> 00:03:00.370
This should be a movie. you don't want to miss any of this, i'm telling you.
00:03:00.436 --> 00:03:01.871
You don't want to miss any of this, i'm telling you. i believe there are
00:03:01.938 --> 00:03:02.939
Any of this, i'm telling you. i believe there are some people that are watching
00:03:03.006 --> 00:03:04.173
I believe there are some people that are watching right now that god is about
00:03:04.240 --> 00:03:05.708
Some people that are watching right now that god is about to maybe set you free.
00:03:05.775 --> 00:03:07.110
Right now that god is about to maybe set you free. he's about to give you
00:03:07.176 --> 00:03:08.311
To maybe set you free. he's about to give you something that you need today,
00:03:08.378 --> 00:03:09.545
He's about to give you something that you need today, that you have been looking for
00:03:09.612 --> 00:03:11.047
Something that you need today, that you have been looking for for a very long time.
00:03:11.114 --> 00:03:12.282
That you have been looking for for a very long time. maybe some answers,
00:03:12.348 --> 00:03:13.349
For a very long time. maybe some answers, maybe something,
00:03:13.416 --> 00:03:14.417
Maybe some answers, maybe something, a breakthrough.
00:03:14.484 --> 00:03:15.485
Maybe something, a breakthrough. here is a sister that has
00:03:15.551 --> 00:03:17.020
A breakthrough. here is a sister that has gone through some things
00:03:17.086 --> 00:03:18.087
Here is a sister that has gone through some things and it's not wasted.
00:03:18.154 --> 00:03:19.155
Gone through some things and it's not wasted. nothing is wasted.
00:03:19.222 --> 00:03:20.290
And it's not wasted. nothing is wasted. i believe god will use this
00:03:20.356 --> 00:03:21.758
Nothing is wasted. i believe god will use this in your life today.
00:03:21.824 --> 00:03:22.959
I believe god will use this in your life today. so sit tight.
00:03:23.026 --> 00:03:24.360
In your life today. so sit tight. i believe god wants to speak
00:03:24.427 --> 00:03:25.495
So sit tight. i believe god wants to speak to you through my friend.
00:03:25.561 --> 00:03:26.996
I believe god wants to speak to you through my friend. so let's start
00:03:27.063 --> 00:03:28.097
To you through my friend. so let's start in your teenage years.
00:03:28.164 --> 00:03:29.766
So let's start in your teenage years. if we wanted to go
00:03:29.832 --> 00:03:30.833
In your teenage years. if we wanted to go all the way back
00:03:30.900 --> 00:03:31.901
If we wanted to go all the way back to being a teenager,
00:03:31.968 --> 00:03:32.969
All the way back to being a teenager, meeting a young guy,
00:03:33.036 --> 00:03:34.103
To being a teenager, meeting a young guy, falling in love.
00:03:34.170 --> 00:03:35.905
Meeting a young guy, falling in love. tell us all about that.
00:03:35.972 --> 00:03:37.240
Falling in love. tell us all about that. m'lisa: all right!
00:03:37.307 --> 00:03:38.374
And i met this guy on stage
00:03:39.542 --> 00:03:40.576
And i met this guy on stage who was singing,
00:03:40.643 --> 00:03:41.744
Who was singing, and i fell madly in love.
00:03:41.811 --> 00:03:43.179
And i fell madly in love. and at 18 years old,
00:03:43.246 --> 00:03:44.480
And at 18 years old, ten days after high school
00:03:44.547 --> 00:03:45.915
We got married
00:03:47.517 --> 00:03:48.551
We got married and we started a life.
00:03:48.618 --> 00:03:49.719
We got married and we started a life. we just thought we were going
00:03:49.786 --> 00:03:50.887
And we started a life. we just thought we were going to take the world by storm.
00:03:50.953 --> 00:03:52.088
We just thought we were going to take the world by storm. we thought we're going
00:03:52.155 --> 00:03:53.156
To take the world by storm. we thought we're going to have it all.
00:03:53.222 --> 00:03:54.223
We thought we're going to have it all. we're going to do it all.
00:03:54.290 --> 00:03:55.391
To have it all. we're going to do it all. we're going to be it all.
00:03:55.458 --> 00:03:56.626
We're going to do it all. we're going to be it all. we thought we had the world
00:03:56.693 --> 00:03:57.827
We're going to be it all. we thought we had the world by the tail.
00:03:57.894 --> 00:03:59.062
We thought we had the world by the tail. so we just start pastoring
00:03:59.128 --> 00:04:00.663
By the tail. so we just start pastoring a church after a couple
00:04:00.730 --> 00:04:01.798
So we just start pastoring a church after a couple of years being married.
00:04:01.864 --> 00:04:03.366
A church after a couple of years being married. we were young, we thought
00:04:03.433 --> 00:04:04.434
Of years being married. we were young, we thought we knew what to do because
00:04:04.500 --> 00:04:05.568
We were young, we thought we knew what to do because my dad was a pastor,
00:04:05.635 --> 00:04:07.003
We knew what to do because my dad was a pastor, his dad had always been
00:04:07.070 --> 00:04:08.237
My dad was a pastor, his dad had always been evangelist-preacher.
00:04:08.304 --> 00:04:10.039
His dad had always been evangelist-preacher. so we thought,
00:04:10.106 --> 00:04:11.074
Evangelist-preacher. so we thought, we've known ministry.
00:04:11.140 --> 00:04:12.075
So we thought, we've known ministry. why not?
00:04:12.141 --> 00:04:13.142
We've known ministry. why not? we'll just do what we have
00:04:13.209 --> 00:04:14.444
Why not? we'll just do what we have watched our whole life.
00:04:14.510 --> 00:04:15.545
We'll just do what we have watched our whole life. this can't be too hard,
00:04:15.611 --> 00:04:16.612
Watched our whole life. this can't be too hard, right?
00:04:16.679 --> 00:04:17.680
This can't be too hard, right? so, we jumped into ministry.
00:04:17.747 --> 00:04:18.981
Right? so, we jumped into ministry. we didn't really have
00:04:19.048 --> 00:04:20.083
So, we jumped into ministry. we didn't really have the right tools and
00:04:20.149 --> 00:04:21.451
We didn't really have the right tools and the great communication skills
00:04:21.517 --> 00:04:22.852
The right tools and the great communication skills that we needed.
00:04:22.919 --> 00:04:24.320
The great communication skills that we needed. we really found ourselves
00:04:24.387 --> 00:04:26.356
That we needed. we really found ourselves after seven years
00:04:26.422 --> 00:04:27.357
We really found ourselves after seven years of pastoring our church and
00:04:27.423 --> 00:04:28.491
After seven years of pastoring our church and ten years of being married,
00:04:28.558 --> 00:04:30.560
Of pastoring our church and ten years of being married, we found ourselves in
00:04:30.626 --> 00:04:31.761
Ten years of being married, we found ourselves in a really desperate situation.
00:04:31.828 --> 00:04:34.330
We found ourselves in a really desperate situation. but one of the things that
00:04:34.397 --> 00:04:35.465
A really desperate situation. but one of the things that i do see that happens a lot
00:04:35.531 --> 00:04:37.400
But one of the things that i do see that happens a lot of times, maybe even
00:04:37.467 --> 00:04:38.434
I do see that happens a lot of times, maybe even in new ministry,
00:04:38.501 --> 00:04:39.569
Of times, maybe even in new ministry, is where we didn't feel like
00:04:39.635 --> 00:04:40.770
In new ministry, is where we didn't feel like we had anybody to go to.
00:04:40.837 --> 00:04:41.871
Is where we didn't feel like we had anybody to go to. we are supposed to be
00:04:41.938 --> 00:04:42.972
We had anybody to go to. we are supposed to be the answer for
00:04:43.039 --> 00:04:44.173
We are supposed to be the answer for other people's problems.
00:04:44.240 --> 00:04:45.341
The answer for other people's problems. but where does a pastor
00:04:45.408 --> 00:04:46.476
Other people's problems. but where does a pastor go for answers or for problems
00:04:46.542 --> 00:04:48.644
But where does a pastor go for answers or for problems that they're having?
00:04:48.711 --> 00:04:50.012
Go for answers or for problems that they're having? so the last couple of years
00:04:50.079 --> 00:04:51.414
That they're having? so the last couple of years of our marriage, my husband,
00:04:51.481 --> 00:04:52.849
So the last couple of years of our marriage, my husband, his behavior became
00:04:52.915 --> 00:04:53.950
Of our marriage, my husband, his behavior became very erratic.
00:04:54.016 --> 00:04:55.351
His behavior became very erratic. and i kept telling him,
00:04:55.418 --> 00:04:56.386
Very erratic. and i kept telling him, this isn't normal.
00:04:56.452 --> 00:04:57.587
And i kept telling him, this isn't normal. your sleeping is not normal.
00:04:57.653 --> 00:05:01.190
This isn't normal. your sleeping is not normal. you don't sleep for days
00:05:01.257 --> 00:05:03.226
Your sleeping is not normal. you don't sleep for days on end, and then i find you
00:05:03.292 --> 00:05:04.694
You don't sleep for days on end, and then i find you in the bed crying.
00:05:04.761 --> 00:05:05.928
On end, and then i find you in the bed crying. i can't get you out of bed
00:05:05.995 --> 00:05:07.029
In the bed crying. i can't get you out of bed because you're depressed
00:05:07.096 --> 00:05:08.197
I can't get you out of bed because you're depressed and emotions were up and down.
00:05:08.264 --> 00:05:09.632
Because you're depressed and emotions were up and down. i didn't know what
00:05:09.699 --> 00:05:10.700
And emotions were up and down. i didn't know what i was going to get for the day
00:05:10.767 --> 00:05:12.034
I didn't know what i was going to get for the day because it was such
00:05:12.101 --> 00:05:13.035
I was going to get for the day because it was such a rollercoaster of emotions.
00:05:13.102 --> 00:05:14.404
Because it was such a rollercoaster of emotions. and i kept saying,
00:05:14.470 --> 00:05:15.438
A rollercoaster of emotions. and i kept saying, there's something wrong.
00:05:15.505 --> 00:05:16.472
And i kept saying, there's something wrong. he kept going, "you're right!
00:05:16.539 --> 00:05:17.607
There's something wrong. he kept going, "you're right! you're driving me crazy."
00:05:17.673 --> 00:05:19.575
He kept going, "you're right! you're driving me crazy." so when everything imploded,
00:05:19.642 --> 00:05:21.377
You're driving me crazy." so when everything imploded, my husband had
00:05:21.444 --> 00:05:22.712
So when everything imploded, my husband had a moral failure,
00:05:22.779 --> 00:05:23.813
My husband had a moral failure, and he actually had
00:05:23.880 --> 00:05:24.881
A moral failure, and he actually had an affair with one of
00:05:24.947 --> 00:05:25.948
And he actually had an affair with one of my really good friends.
00:05:26.015 --> 00:05:27.183
An affair with one of my really good friends. so, we completely fell apart.
00:05:27.250 --> 00:05:28.851
My really good friends. so, we completely fell apart. i mean, it was a devastating
00:05:28.918 --> 00:05:30.119
So, we completely fell apart. i mean, it was a devastating end to our marriage.
00:05:30.186 --> 00:05:32.121
I mean, it was a devastating end to our marriage. at that time, my husband
00:05:32.188 --> 00:05:33.756
End to our marriage. at that time, my husband became suicidal, and
00:05:33.823 --> 00:05:35.825
At that time, my husband became suicidal, and he actually realized
00:05:35.892 --> 00:05:37.160
Became suicidal, and he actually realized how desperate of a situation
00:05:37.226 --> 00:05:38.294
He actually realized how desperate of a situation he was in.
00:05:38.361 --> 00:05:39.328
How desperate of a situation he was in. so, he did go for counseling
00:05:39.395 --> 00:05:40.696
He was in. so, he did go for counseling at that point in time.
00:05:40.763 --> 00:05:41.898
So, he did go for counseling at that point in time. they diagnosed him
00:05:41.964 --> 00:05:43.199
At that point in time. they diagnosed him manic depressive, bipolar,
00:05:43.266 --> 00:05:45.835
They diagnosed him manic depressive, bipolar, which answered a lot
00:05:45.902 --> 00:05:46.869
Manic depressive, bipolar, which answered a lot of questions in my mind.
00:05:46.936 --> 00:05:47.870
Which answered a lot of questions in my mind. i was like, i knew
00:05:47.937 --> 00:05:49.005
Of questions in my mind. i was like, i knew this wasn't normal behavior.
00:05:49.071 --> 00:05:50.273
I was like, i knew this wasn't normal behavior. well, my husband, he went
00:05:50.339 --> 00:05:51.340
This wasn't normal behavior. well, my husband, he went on this healing journey
00:05:51.407 --> 00:05:52.575
Well, my husband, he went on this healing journey of saying, god, i don't know
00:05:52.642 --> 00:05:54.277
On this healing journey of saying, god, i don't know how i got here and how
00:05:54.343 --> 00:05:55.545
Of saying, god, i don't know how i got here and how i've made the decisions
00:05:55.611 --> 00:05:56.612
How i got here and how i've made the decisions like i've made in my life.
00:05:56.679 --> 00:05:57.980
I've made the decisions like i've made in my life. and so he went on
00:05:58.047 --> 00:05:59.081
Like i've made in my life. and so he went on a healing journey, which
00:05:59.148 --> 00:06:00.149
And so he went on a healing journey, which i'll get to in a little bit.
00:06:00.216 --> 00:06:01.551
A healing journey, which i'll get to in a little bit. but me, i kind of went
00:06:01.617 --> 00:06:03.186
I'll get to in a little bit. but me, i kind of went the opposite direction.
00:06:03.252 --> 00:06:04.253
But me, i kind of went the opposite direction. i had been raised
00:06:04.320 --> 00:06:05.321
The opposite direction. i had been raised in a pastor's home,
00:06:05.388 --> 00:06:06.389
I had been raised in a pastor's home, then i had been
00:06:06.456 --> 00:06:07.457
In a pastor's home, then i had been a pastor's wife,
00:06:07.523 --> 00:06:08.524
Then i had been a pastor's wife, so i was mad at my husband,
00:06:08.591 --> 00:06:10.092
A pastor's wife, so i was mad at my husband, i was mad at my friend,
00:06:10.159 --> 00:06:11.360
So i was mad at my husband, i was mad at my friend, i was mad at god.
00:06:11.427 --> 00:06:12.428
I was mad at my friend, i was mad at god. like i've served you
00:06:12.495 --> 00:06:13.496
I was mad at god. like i've served you my whole life.
00:06:13.563 --> 00:06:14.564
Like i've served you my whole life. how did this end up the life
00:06:14.630 --> 00:06:16.098
My whole life. how did this end up the life that i'm living right now?
00:06:16.165 --> 00:06:17.633
How did this end up the life that i'm living right now? so i actually just
00:06:17.700 --> 00:06:19.502
That i'm living right now? so i actually just dove head-in to the world.
00:06:19.569 --> 00:06:21.671
So i actually just dove head-in to the world. i just thought, you know what?
00:06:21.737 --> 00:06:22.872
Dove head-in to the world. i just thought, you know what? i'm going to go.
00:06:22.939 --> 00:06:23.940
I just thought, you know what? i'm going to go. i've always loved dancing.
00:06:24.006 --> 00:06:25.007
I'm going to go. i've always loved dancing. it's just been something
00:06:25.074 --> 00:06:26.075
I've always loved dancing. it's just been something i've always loved.
00:06:26.142 --> 00:06:27.143
It's just been something i've always loved. but i was from
00:06:27.210 --> 00:06:28.211
I've always loved. but i was from a pentecostal denomination,
00:06:28.277 --> 00:06:29.278
But i was from a pentecostal denomination, so it was taboo.
00:06:29.345 --> 00:06:30.346
A pentecostal denomination, so it was taboo. so, i was like, i'm going
00:06:30.413 --> 00:06:31.581
So it was taboo. so, i was like, i'm going to go dancing.
00:06:31.647 --> 00:06:32.648
So, i was like, i'm going to go dancing. tammy: i'm going to do
00:06:32.715 --> 00:06:33.716
To go dancing. tammy: i'm going to do all the things that i was
00:06:33.783 --> 00:06:34.951
Tammy: i'm going to do all the things that i was not supposed to do, right?
00:06:35.017 --> 00:06:36.018
All the things that i was not supposed to do, right? because i'm out.
00:06:36.085 --> 00:06:37.086
Not supposed to do, right? because i'm out. i think so many of us
00:06:37.153 --> 00:06:38.287
Because i'm out. i think so many of us get to that place when
00:06:38.354 --> 00:06:39.355
I think so many of us get to that place when we're mad at god, especially,
00:06:39.422 --> 00:06:40.423
You don't think about
00:06:41.591 --> 00:06:42.558
You don't think about the consequences.
00:06:42.625 --> 00:06:43.626
The consequences. so, i'm out and i'm going
00:06:43.693 --> 00:06:44.827
So, i'm out and i'm going to do everything that
00:06:44.894 --> 00:06:45.895
To do everything that i've been told not to do.
00:06:45.962 --> 00:06:47.129
I've been told not to do. anything you tell me that
00:06:47.196 --> 00:06:48.197
Blynda: you had expectations
00:06:49.765 --> 00:06:50.733
Blynda: you had expectations in your life of what your life
00:06:50.800 --> 00:06:52.268
Blynda: you had expectations in your life of what your life was going to look like,
00:06:52.335 --> 00:06:53.336
In your life of what your life was going to look like, and none of it
00:06:53.402 --> 00:06:54.403
Was going to look like, and none of it was panning out.
00:06:54.470 --> 00:06:55.471
And none of it was panning out. so, it's like, well,
00:06:55.538 --> 00:06:56.606
Was panning out. so, it's like, well, if it's not going to pan out,
00:06:56.672 --> 00:06:57.707
M'lisa: so i started clubbing.
00:07:01.010 --> 00:07:02.879
M'lisa: so i started clubbing. i started hanging out
00:07:02.945 --> 00:07:04.247
I started hanging out with all the wrong people.
00:07:04.313 --> 00:07:05.815
With all the wrong people. the thing that they say
00:07:05.882 --> 00:07:07.283
The thing that they say about "show me your friends,
00:07:07.350 --> 00:07:08.451
About "show me your friends, i'll show you your future,"
00:07:08.518 --> 00:07:09.685
I want you to know
00:07:11.387 --> 00:07:12.555
I want you to know that surrounding yourself
00:07:12.622 --> 00:07:13.923
I want you to know that surrounding yourself with the wrong people,
00:07:13.990 --> 00:07:15.591
That surrounding yourself with the wrong people, oh, it just drug me down
00:07:15.658 --> 00:07:17.260
With the wrong people, oh, it just drug me down into a life of --
00:07:17.326 --> 00:07:18.694
Oh, it just drug me down into a life of -- they introduced me to alcohol,
00:07:18.761 --> 00:07:20.763
Into a life of -- they introduced me to alcohol, i was drinking all the time.
00:07:20.830 --> 00:07:22.298
They introduced me to alcohol, i was drinking all the time. blynda: it says, "bad company
00:07:22.365 --> 00:07:23.466
I was drinking all the time. blynda: it says, "bad company corrupts good morals."
00:07:23.533 --> 00:07:24.800
Blynda: it says, "bad company corrupts good morals." m'lisa: exactly!
00:07:24.867 --> 00:07:26.002
Corrupts good morals." m'lisa: exactly! they introduced me to drugs.
00:07:26.068 --> 00:07:27.236
M'lisa: exactly! they introduced me to drugs. i started using crystal meth.
00:07:27.303 --> 00:07:28.771
They introduced me to drugs. i started using crystal meth. tammy: oh my goodness,
00:07:28.838 --> 00:07:29.805
I started using crystal meth. tammy: oh my goodness, m'lisa.
00:07:29.872 --> 00:07:31.140
Tammy: oh my goodness, m'lisa. m'lisa: yeah, yeah.
00:07:31.207 --> 00:07:32.341
M'lisa. m'lisa: yeah, yeah. i thought, you know, i could
00:07:32.408 --> 00:07:33.843
M'lisa: yeah, yeah. i thought, you know, i could dance all night long,
00:07:33.910 --> 00:07:35.144
I thought, you know, i could dance all night long, and i was even better when
00:07:35.211 --> 00:07:36.445
Dance all night long, and i was even better when i was drinking and on drugs.
00:07:36.512 --> 00:07:38.214
And i was even better when i was drinking and on drugs. but it led me in a spiraling
00:07:38.281 --> 00:07:39.982
I was drinking and on drugs. but it led me in a spiraling lifestyle out of control.
00:07:40.049 --> 00:07:42.385
But it led me in a spiraling lifestyle out of control. i was just medicating my pain;
00:07:42.451 --> 00:07:44.253
Lifestyle out of control. i was just medicating my pain; trying to medicate the holes
00:07:44.320 --> 00:07:45.855
I was just medicating my pain; trying to medicate the holes that were in my heart.
00:07:45.922 --> 00:07:47.356
Trying to medicate the holes that were in my heart. i was sleeping with
00:07:47.423 --> 00:07:48.758
That were in my heart. i was sleeping with all the guys thinking that
00:07:48.824 --> 00:07:50.359
I was sleeping with all the guys thinking that they're going to give me
00:07:50.426 --> 00:07:51.594
All the guys thinking that they're going to give me the love and acceptance
00:07:51.661 --> 00:07:52.762
They're going to give me the love and acceptance that i'm looking for
00:07:52.828 --> 00:07:53.996
The love and acceptance that i'm looking for and that i haven't found.
00:07:54.063 --> 00:07:55.298
That i'm looking for and that i haven't found. i just found myself
00:07:55.364 --> 00:07:56.465
And that i haven't found. i just found myself in a very dark place.
00:07:56.532 --> 00:07:57.833
I just found myself in a very dark place. i found myself pregnant.
00:07:57.900 --> 00:08:01.270
In a very dark place. i found myself pregnant. i didn't even know
00:08:01.337 --> 00:08:02.505
I found myself pregnant. i didn't even know who the father was.
00:08:02.572 --> 00:08:04.473
I didn't even know who the father was. and here i had been,
00:08:04.540 --> 00:08:05.675
Who the father was. and here i had been, a pastor's wife.
00:08:05.741 --> 00:08:06.943
And here i had been, a pastor's wife. i'd been raised in church
00:08:07.009 --> 00:08:08.277
A pastor's wife. i'd been raised in church my whole life, and i thought,
00:08:08.344 --> 00:08:09.545
I'd been raised in church my whole life, and i thought, how did i get here?
00:08:09.612 --> 00:08:12.381
My whole life, and i thought, how did i get here? well, my husband, i said
00:08:12.448 --> 00:08:13.816
How did i get here? well, my husband, i said his journey was different.
00:08:13.883 --> 00:08:15.718
Well, my husband, i said his journey was different. he was leaning into god.
00:08:15.785 --> 00:08:17.520
His journey was different. he was leaning into god. he was trying to find his way,
00:08:17.587 --> 00:08:19.789
He was leaning into god. he was trying to find his way, and god miraculously
00:08:19.855 --> 00:08:20.890
He was trying to find his way, and god miraculously healed him.
00:08:20.957 --> 00:08:22.358
And god miraculously healed him. he used the scriptures.
00:08:22.425 --> 00:08:23.459
Healed him. he used the scriptures. he used the word of god.
00:08:23.526 --> 00:08:24.594
He used the scriptures. he used the word of god. god gave him a plan
00:08:24.660 --> 00:08:25.761
He used the word of god. god gave him a plan of discipline in his life
00:08:25.828 --> 00:08:26.896
God gave him a plan of discipline in his life of just leading every thought
00:08:26.963 --> 00:08:28.164
Of discipline in his life of just leading every thought captive to the obedience
00:08:28.230 --> 00:08:29.231
Of just leading every thought captive to the obedience of christ.
00:08:29.298 --> 00:08:30.533
Captive to the obedience of christ. he did that in a regimented
00:08:30.600 --> 00:08:31.701
Of christ. he did that in a regimented timeframe of every 30 minutes,
00:08:31.767 --> 00:08:34.070
He did that in a regimented timeframe of every 30 minutes, then every hour
00:08:34.136 --> 00:08:35.204
Timeframe of every 30 minutes, then every hour after a certain amount of time
00:08:35.271 --> 00:08:36.372
Then every hour after a certain amount of time and then every, you know,
00:08:36.439 --> 00:08:37.473
After a certain amount of time and then every, you know, three hours after
00:08:37.540 --> 00:08:38.608
And then every, you know, three hours after a certain amount of time.
00:08:38.674 --> 00:08:39.842
Three hours after a certain amount of time. and he was diligent
00:08:39.909 --> 00:08:41.243
A certain amount of time. and he was diligent in his healing journey.
00:08:41.310 --> 00:08:43.813
And he was diligent in his healing journey. god rewired his mind.
00:08:43.879 --> 00:08:45.214
In his healing journey. god rewired his mind. he healed him completely.
00:08:45.281 --> 00:08:46.349
God rewired his mind. he healed him completely. and 30 years later,
00:08:46.415 --> 00:08:47.516
He healed him completely. and 30 years later, he's never had a bout
00:08:47.583 --> 00:08:49.051
And 30 years later, he's never had a bout of depression.
00:08:49.118 --> 00:08:50.119
He's never had a bout of depression. he's never had a bout
00:08:50.186 --> 00:08:51.621
Of depression. he's never had a bout of anxiety.
00:08:51.687 --> 00:08:52.688
He's never had a bout of anxiety. he is completely
00:08:52.755 --> 00:08:53.756
Tammy: how did that change
00:08:54.924 --> 00:08:56.359
Tammy: how did that change your relationship?
00:08:56.425 --> 00:08:57.560
Your relationship? m'lisa: well, when i found
00:08:57.627 --> 00:08:59.028
M'lisa: well, when i found myself hitting rock bottom,
00:08:59.095 --> 00:09:01.664
Myself hitting rock bottom, it was then that i actually
00:09:01.731 --> 00:09:03.199
It was then that i actually went to my husband
00:09:03.265 --> 00:09:04.533
That took my heart and
00:09:07.903 --> 00:09:09.772
That took my heart and he loved me unconditionally.
00:09:09.839 --> 00:09:12.942
That took my heart and he loved me unconditionally. when i had the abortion,
00:09:13.009 --> 00:09:14.710
He loved me unconditionally. when i had the abortion, because i made the decision
00:09:14.777 --> 00:09:15.878
When i had the abortion, because i made the decision to not keep the baby,
00:09:15.945 --> 00:09:17.179
Because i made the decision to not keep the baby, i was devastated.
00:09:17.246 --> 00:09:18.414
To not keep the baby, i was devastated. that was my rock bottom.
00:09:18.481 --> 00:09:19.548
I was devastated. that was my rock bottom. he loved me and he held me.
00:09:19.615 --> 00:09:22.218
That was my rock bottom. he loved me and he held me. he showed me a love that
00:09:22.284 --> 00:09:23.619
He loved me and he held me. he showed me a love that only jesus could show me.
00:09:23.686 --> 00:09:24.887
He showed me a love that only jesus could show me. and i just thought, i don't
00:09:24.954 --> 00:09:26.822
Only jesus could show me. and i just thought, i don't think i'll ever find a man
00:09:26.889 --> 00:09:28.157
And i just thought, i don't think i'll ever find a man that loves me like
00:09:28.224 --> 00:09:29.358
Think i'll ever find a man that loves me like this man loves me.
00:09:29.425 --> 00:09:30.493
That loves me like this man loves me. and i also see the difference.
00:09:30.559 --> 00:09:32.128
This man loves me. and i also see the difference. he wasn't the man i divorced.
00:09:32.194 --> 00:09:33.362
And i also see the difference. he wasn't the man i divorced. he was the man that i fell
00:09:33.429 --> 00:09:34.530
He wasn't the man i divorced. he was the man that i fell in love with at 15 years old.
00:09:34.597 --> 00:09:35.831
He was the man that i fell in love with at 15 years old. i saw this old rekindling
00:09:35.898 --> 00:09:38.367
In love with at 15 years old. i saw this old rekindling like oh, you're back.
00:09:38.434 --> 00:09:40.236
I saw this old rekindling like oh, you're back. i saw what god had
00:09:40.302 --> 00:09:41.704
Like oh, you're back. i saw what god had actually done in his life.
00:09:41.771 --> 00:09:45.007
I saw what god had actually done in his life. and we started being friends
00:09:45.074 --> 00:09:46.876
Actually done in his life. and we started being friends and we started laughing again
00:09:46.942 --> 00:09:48.177
And we started being friends and we started laughing again and having fun again.
00:09:48.244 --> 00:09:49.311
And we started laughing again and having fun again. we started dating again.
00:09:49.378 --> 00:09:50.846
And having fun again. we started dating again. god miraculously got us
00:09:50.913 --> 00:09:52.314
We started dating again. god miraculously got us back together, redeemed us,
00:09:52.381 --> 00:09:54.183
God miraculously got us back together, redeemed us, restored our marriage,
00:09:54.250 --> 00:09:55.551
Back together, redeemed us, restored our marriage, and we absolutely got back
00:09:55.618 --> 00:09:57.353
Restored our marriage, and we absolutely got back together and remarried.
00:09:57.420 --> 00:09:59.488
And we absolutely got back together and remarried. it was a beautiful story.
00:09:59.555 --> 00:10:01.290
Together and remarried. it was a beautiful story. i mean, i'm not going to say
00:10:01.357 --> 00:10:02.458
It was a beautiful story. i mean, i'm not going to say it's butterflies and rainbows.
00:10:02.525 --> 00:10:03.726
I mean, i'm not going to say it's butterflies and rainbows. i mean, it was a lot of work.
00:10:03.793 --> 00:10:05.194
It's butterflies and rainbows. i mean, it was a lot of work. there was a lot
00:10:05.261 --> 00:10:06.328
I mean, it was a lot of work. there was a lot of baggage we had.
00:10:06.395 --> 00:10:07.563
There was a lot of baggage we had. you know, the backpack,
00:10:07.630 --> 00:10:08.698
Of baggage we had. you know, the backpack, the fanny pack, the roll on.
00:10:08.764 --> 00:10:10.066
You know, the backpack, the fanny pack, the roll on. blynda: a lot of baggage!
00:10:10.132 --> 00:10:11.434
In such a drastic way.
00:10:13.002 --> 00:10:15.071
In such a drastic way. so, we went through
00:10:15.137 --> 00:10:16.338
So, we went through extensive marriage counseling
00:10:16.405 --> 00:10:17.606
Extensive marriage counseling to get it right this time,
00:10:17.673 --> 00:10:18.607
To get it right this time, and to get the tools that
00:10:18.674 --> 00:10:20.142
Able to just have a
00:10:21.711 --> 00:10:23.145
Able to just have a successful marriage this time
00:10:23.212 --> 00:10:24.547
Able to just have a successful marriage this time because we weren't going
00:10:24.613 --> 00:10:25.781
Successful marriage this time because we weren't going to mess this one up again.
00:10:25.848 --> 00:10:26.916
Tammy: one of the things
00:10:27.016 --> 00:10:28.017
Tammy: one of the things you talk about
00:10:28.084 --> 00:10:29.251
Tammy: one of the things you talk about that impacted me a lot, too,
00:10:29.318 --> 00:10:30.886
You talk about that impacted me a lot, too, was everything you'd gone
00:10:30.953 --> 00:10:32.988
That impacted me a lot, too, was everything you'd gone through in your marriage,
00:10:33.055 --> 00:10:34.356
Was everything you'd gone through in your marriage, the choices that you made,
00:10:34.423 --> 00:10:35.658
How he came back to
00:10:35.758 --> 00:10:37.827
How he came back to the father just set a fire.
00:10:37.893 --> 00:10:40.029
How he came back to the father just set a fire. you saw that, and it began
00:10:40.096 --> 00:10:41.430
The father just set a fire. you saw that, and it began to do a breakthrough
00:10:41.497 --> 00:10:42.598
You saw that, and it began to do a breakthrough in your own life.
00:10:42.665 --> 00:10:43.866
To do a breakthrough in your own life. it brought you back to jesus.
00:10:43.933 --> 00:10:45.134
In your own life. it brought you back to jesus. and then the two of you
00:10:45.201 --> 00:10:46.268
It brought you back to jesus. and then the two of you began healing, and god began
00:10:46.335 --> 00:10:48.304
And then the two of you began healing, and god began to restore your marriage.
00:10:48.370 --> 00:10:50.906
Began healing, and god began to restore your marriage. but what wipes me out
00:10:50.973 --> 00:10:52.775
To restore your marriage. but what wipes me out is the part where
00:10:52.842 --> 00:10:54.343
But what wipes me out is the part where only a few months later,
00:10:54.410 --> 00:10:56.178
Is the part where only a few months later, was it that you were
00:10:56.245 --> 00:10:57.480
Only a few months later, was it that you were in a horrific car accident
00:10:57.546 --> 00:10:59.515
Was it that you were in a horrific car accident where your nine-year-old son
00:10:59.582 --> 00:11:01.117
In a horrific car accident where your nine-year-old son was killed?
00:11:01.183 --> 00:11:02.651
Where your nine-year-old son was killed? and i'm telling you
00:11:02.718 --> 00:11:03.886
Was killed? and i'm telling you that at that moment
00:11:03.953 --> 00:11:05.187
And i'm telling you that at that moment i think, oh, god. like, why?
00:11:05.254 --> 00:11:07.723
That at that moment i think, oh, god. like, why? like, i think i would
00:11:07.790 --> 00:11:08.758
I think, oh, god. like, why? like, i think i would be like, why?
00:11:08.824 --> 00:11:09.992
Like, i think i would be like, why? i've gone through all of this.
00:11:10.059 --> 00:11:11.160
Be like, why? i've gone through all of this. i've gotten this far.
00:11:11.227 --> 00:11:12.328
I've gone through all of this. i've gotten this far. i'm restoring my life.
00:11:12.394 --> 00:11:13.429
I've gotten this far. i'm restoring my life. i'm doing everything right.
00:11:13.496 --> 00:11:14.497
I'm restoring my life. i'm doing everything right. and then this.
00:11:14.563 --> 00:11:15.631
I'm doing everything right. and then this. how do you reconcile
00:11:15.698 --> 00:11:17.533
And then this. how do you reconcile a good god with a moment
00:11:17.600 --> 00:11:19.101
How do you reconcile a good god with a moment like that?
00:11:19.168 --> 00:11:20.202
A good god with a moment like that? m'lisa: exactly.
00:11:20.269 --> 00:11:21.370
Like that? m'lisa: exactly. it is a moment of questioning
00:11:21.437 --> 00:11:22.571
M'lisa: exactly. it is a moment of questioning your faith,
00:11:22.638 --> 00:11:23.606
It is a moment of questioning your faith, questioning everything
00:11:23.672 --> 00:11:24.774
Your faith, questioning everything i've done, everything that
00:11:24.840 --> 00:11:25.841
Questioning everything i've done, everything that i knew to do to bring myself
00:11:25.908 --> 00:11:27.543
I've done, everything that i knew to do to bring myself back to a place
00:11:27.610 --> 00:11:29.111
I knew to do to bring myself back to a place of being obedient to him,
00:11:29.178 --> 00:11:31.514
Back to a place of being obedient to him, of being in the life that
00:11:31.580 --> 00:11:32.815
Of being obedient to him, of being in the life that i know he called us to.
00:11:32.882 --> 00:11:34.717
Of being in the life that i know he called us to. we wanted to have a church
00:11:34.784 --> 00:11:36.085
I know he called us to. we wanted to have a church that cares where you're going
00:11:36.152 --> 00:11:37.820
We wanted to have a church that cares where you're going and not where you've been.
00:11:37.887 --> 00:11:39.021
That cares where you're going and not where you've been. we've made that the motto of
00:11:39.088 --> 00:11:40.022
And not where you've been. we've made that the motto of our church for our own lives;
00:11:40.089 --> 00:11:41.457
We've made that the motto of our church for our own lives; to just accept people
00:11:41.524 --> 00:11:42.658
Our church for our own lives; to just accept people and love people
00:11:42.725 --> 00:11:43.726
To just accept people and love people right where they're at,
00:11:43.793 --> 00:11:44.827
And love people right where they're at, and know that there's hope
00:11:44.894 --> 00:11:45.895
Right where they're at, and know that there's hope and redemption for them.
00:11:45.961 --> 00:11:47.196
And know that there's hope and redemption for them. so, when we started the church
00:11:47.263 --> 00:11:49.265
And redemption for them. so, when we started the church -- four months after starting
00:11:49.331 --> 00:11:50.432
So, when we started the church -- four months after starting the church is when we had
00:11:50.499 --> 00:11:51.767
-- four months after starting the church is when we had a horrific car accident.
00:11:51.834 --> 00:11:53.736
The church is when we had a horrific car accident. but not only was
00:11:53.803 --> 00:11:54.870
A horrific car accident. but not only was brandon killed
00:11:54.937 --> 00:11:55.971
But not only was brandon killed in that car accident,
00:11:56.038 --> 00:11:57.606
Brandon killed in that car accident, i was in the passenger side,
00:11:57.673 --> 00:11:59.608
In that car accident, i was in the passenger side, and i wound up on top
00:11:59.675 --> 00:12:01.043
I was in the passenger side, and i wound up on top of the boys in the back seat.
00:12:01.110 --> 00:12:03.112
And i wound up on top of the boys in the back seat. and in that, i sustained
00:12:03.179 --> 00:12:04.713
Of the boys in the back seat. and in that, i sustained so many injuries myself.
00:12:04.780 --> 00:12:06.248
And in that, i sustained so many injuries myself. i must have hit the dash
00:12:06.315 --> 00:12:08.117
So many injuries myself. i must have hit the dash or something with my face
00:12:08.184 --> 00:12:09.652
I must have hit the dash or something with my face because my face was
00:12:09.718 --> 00:12:11.053
Or something with my face because my face was completely crushed.
00:12:11.120 --> 00:12:12.288
Because my face was completely crushed. i had no cartilage left
00:12:12.354 --> 00:12:13.522
Completely crushed. i had no cartilage left in my nose.
00:12:13.589 --> 00:12:14.657
I had no cartilage left in my nose. they had to cut me from ear
00:12:14.723 --> 00:12:15.858
In my nose. they had to cut me from ear to ear and pull
00:12:15.925 --> 00:12:18.027
They had to cut me from ear to ear and pull my face off in two
00:12:18.093 --> 00:12:19.395
To ear and pull my face off in two reconstructive surgeries.
00:12:19.461 --> 00:12:21.697
My face off in two reconstructive surgeries. they had to rebuild my nose
00:12:21.764 --> 00:12:23.632
Reconstructive surgeries. they had to rebuild my nose with the grafting from
00:12:23.699 --> 00:12:24.900
They had to rebuild my nose with the grafting from my skull bone to give me
00:12:24.967 --> 00:12:26.168
With the grafting from my skull bone to give me a new nose.
00:12:26.235 --> 00:12:27.436
My skull bone to give me a new nose. they had to replace
00:12:27.503 --> 00:12:29.238
A new nose. they had to replace the plates with -- i mean,
00:12:29.305 --> 00:12:30.840
They had to replace the plates with -- i mean, they replaced the eye sockets
00:12:30.906 --> 00:12:32.942
The plates with -- i mean, they replaced the eye sockets with plates and screws
00:12:33.008 --> 00:12:34.643
They replaced the eye sockets with plates and screws to put them back together.
00:12:34.710 --> 00:12:35.845
With plates and screws to put them back together. my face was like a jigsaw
00:12:35.911 --> 00:12:37.146
To put them back together. my face was like a jigsaw puzzle to put back together.
00:12:37.213 --> 00:12:38.314
My face was like a jigsaw puzzle to put back together. blynda: you're a walking
00:12:38.380 --> 00:12:39.415
Puzzle to put back together. blynda: you're a walking miracle.
00:12:39.481 --> 00:12:40.482
Blynda: you're a walking miracle. m'lisa: i'm a walking miracle.
00:12:40.549 --> 00:12:41.650
Miracle. m'lisa: i'm a walking miracle. i have plates and screws
00:12:41.717 --> 00:12:42.685
M'lisa: i'm a walking miracle. i have plates and screws in my neck; i broke
00:12:42.751 --> 00:12:43.752
I have plates and screws in my neck; i broke two vertebrae in my neck
00:12:43.819 --> 00:12:44.820
In my neck; i broke two vertebrae in my neck and i have 14-inch rods,
00:12:44.887 --> 00:12:45.888
Two vertebrae in my neck and i have 14-inch rods, titanium rods down my back
00:12:45.955 --> 00:12:46.956
And i have 14-inch rods, titanium rods down my back where i broke three vertebrae
00:12:47.022 --> 00:12:48.057
Titanium rods down my back where i broke three vertebrae in my back.
00:12:48.123 --> 00:12:49.425
Where i broke three vertebrae in my back. so i was unconscious
00:12:49.491 --> 00:12:51.560
In my back. so i was unconscious and i come to and
00:12:51.627 --> 00:12:53.095
So i was unconscious and i come to and that was the first thing
00:12:53.162 --> 00:12:54.163
And i come to and that was the first thing that i find out,
00:12:54.230 --> 00:12:55.231
That was the first thing that i find out, coming to was that my son
00:12:55.297 --> 00:12:56.899
That i find out, coming to was that my son brandon was killed.
00:12:56.966 --> 00:12:59.001
Coming to was that my son brandon was killed. i remember hearing that
00:12:59.068 --> 00:13:01.003
Brandon was killed. i remember hearing that and experiencing the worst
00:13:01.070 --> 00:13:02.671
I remember hearing that and experiencing the worst horrific moment in my life.
00:13:02.738 --> 00:13:05.074
And experiencing the worst horrific moment in my life. i'm pulling tubes out
00:13:05.140 --> 00:13:06.408
Horrific moment in my life. i'm pulling tubes out and i'm screaming.
00:13:06.475 --> 00:13:07.576
I'm pulling tubes out and i'm screaming. i'm thinking, if i can get
00:13:07.643 --> 00:13:08.677
And i'm screaming. i'm thinking, if i can get to my son, i can save him.
00:13:08.744 --> 00:13:12.114
I'm thinking, if i can get to my son, i can save him. in that moment, they came in
00:13:12.181 --> 00:13:14.116
To my son, i can save him. in that moment, they came in and they sedated me
00:13:14.183 --> 00:13:15.251
In that moment, they came in and they sedated me with morphine,
00:13:15.317 --> 00:13:16.518
And they sedated me with morphine, and they knocked me out.
00:13:16.585 --> 00:13:17.887
With morphine, and they knocked me out. but i just knew when
00:13:17.953 --> 00:13:19.154
And they knocked me out. but i just knew when i came back, i was like,
00:13:19.221 --> 00:13:20.556
On my own.
00:13:21.757 --> 00:13:22.725
On my own. i'm not going
00:13:22.791 --> 00:13:23.859
I'm not going to be able to heal.
00:13:23.926 --> 00:13:25.261
To be able to heal. because, of course, my body
00:13:25.327 --> 00:13:26.395
Because, of course, my body is just broken
00:13:26.462 --> 00:13:27.463
Is just broken into a million pieces.
00:13:27.529 --> 00:13:28.564
Into a million pieces. but it had nothing, the pain
00:13:28.631 --> 00:13:29.565
But it had nothing, the pain of that had nothing
00:13:29.632 --> 00:13:30.666
Of my momma's heart
00:13:31.967 --> 00:13:33.369
Of my momma's heart of my son being ripped
00:13:33.435 --> 00:13:34.536
Of my momma's heart of my son being ripped from my life.
00:13:34.603 --> 00:13:35.871
Of my son being ripped from my life. i just think, god,
00:13:35.938 --> 00:13:37.339
From my life. i just think, god, why did you leave me here?
00:13:37.406 --> 00:13:39.308
I just think, god, why did you leave me here? why would i be in this
00:13:39.375 --> 00:13:40.809
Why did you leave me here? why would i be in this kind of condition,
00:13:40.876 --> 00:13:41.944
Why would i be in this kind of condition, in this kind of pain,
00:13:42.011 --> 00:13:43.445
Kind of condition, in this kind of pain, why didn't you let me
00:13:43.512 --> 00:13:44.480
In this kind of pain, why didn't you let me go be with brandon?
00:13:44.546 --> 00:13:45.848
Why didn't you let me go be with brandon? i remember him specifically
00:13:45.915 --> 00:13:46.849
Go be with brandon? i remember him specifically saying, "i left you here
00:13:46.916 --> 00:13:48.117
I remember him specifically saying, "i left you here on purpose with a purpose."
00:13:48.183 --> 00:13:50.286
Saying, "i left you here on purpose with a purpose." when he whispered that
00:13:50.352 --> 00:13:51.654
I was like, okay, god,
00:13:53.088 --> 00:13:55.057
I was like, okay, god, i'm going to make it
00:13:55.124 --> 00:13:56.225
I'm going to make it my life's mission
00:13:56.292 --> 00:13:57.559
My life's mission to not waste this pain.
00:13:57.626 --> 00:13:59.528
To not waste this pain. i'm going to make it
00:13:59.595 --> 00:14:00.596
People know that they can live
00:14:01.830 --> 00:14:02.965
People know that they can live beyond the pain of
00:14:03.032 --> 00:14:04.300
People know that they can live beyond the pain of a loss of a child.
00:14:04.366 --> 00:14:05.801
Beyond the pain of a loss of a child. they can not only have hope
00:14:05.868 --> 00:14:07.670
A loss of a child. they can not only have hope after a marriage that's been
00:14:07.736 --> 00:14:09.538
They can not only have hope after a marriage that's been destroyed and back together,
00:14:09.605 --> 00:14:11.273
After a marriage that's been destroyed and back together, and god restored that.
00:14:11.340 --> 00:14:12.608
Destroyed and back together, and god restored that. a lot of marriages never,
00:14:12.675 --> 00:14:14.109
And god restored that. a lot of marriages never, ever make it through
00:14:14.176 --> 00:14:15.344
A lot of marriages never, ever make it through a loss of a child.
00:14:15.411 --> 00:14:16.745
Ever make it through a loss of a child. so that's when we know
00:14:16.812 --> 00:14:17.880
A loss of a child. so that's when we know that god superglued us
00:14:17.947 --> 00:14:19.081
So that's when we know that god superglued us back together.
00:14:19.148 --> 00:14:20.082
That god superglued us back together. i mean, he just miraculously
00:14:20.149 --> 00:14:21.550
Back together. i mean, he just miraculously did such an amazing job
00:14:21.617 --> 00:14:22.618
I mean, he just miraculously did such an amazing job on our marriage.
00:14:22.685 --> 00:14:24.019
Did such an amazing job on our marriage. i just had to keep my focus
00:14:24.086 --> 00:14:25.254
On our marriage. i just had to keep my focus on saying, god,
00:14:25.321 --> 00:14:26.322
I just had to keep my focus on saying, god, you were the one
00:14:26.388 --> 00:14:27.456
On saying, god, you were the one that healed our marriage,
00:14:27.523 --> 00:14:29.325
You were the one that healed our marriage, you can heal my heart
00:14:29.391 --> 00:14:30.492
That healed our marriage, you can heal my heart through this, too.
00:14:30.559 --> 00:14:31.560
You can heal my heart through this, too. i have to hold on to you.
00:14:31.627 --> 00:14:32.728
Through this, too. i have to hold on to you. you've never left me, but
00:14:32.795 --> 00:14:33.829
I have to hold on to you. you've never left me, but that's the only way that
00:14:33.896 --> 00:14:34.897
You've never left me, but that's the only way that i'm going to make it through
00:14:34.964 --> 00:14:35.998
That's the only way that i'm going to make it through this is holding on to you.
00:14:36.065 --> 00:14:37.166
I'm going to make it through this is holding on to you. i remember being
00:14:37.232 --> 00:14:38.367
This is holding on to you. i remember being in my hospital bed,
00:14:38.434 --> 00:14:39.802
I remember being in my hospital bed, tears rolling from my eyes
00:14:39.868 --> 00:14:40.869
In my hospital bed, tears rolling from my eyes and just thinking, god,
00:14:40.936 --> 00:14:42.004
Tears rolling from my eyes and just thinking, god, i don't know how i'm going
00:14:42.071 --> 00:14:43.272
And just thinking, god, i don't know how i'm going to make it another day.
00:14:43.339 --> 00:14:44.473
I don't know how i'm going to make it another day. i would just have to raise up
00:14:44.540 --> 00:14:45.541
To make it another day. i would just have to raise up my hands like i'm holding
00:14:45.607 --> 00:14:46.642
I would just have to raise up my hands like i'm holding onto him because i couldn't
00:14:46.709 --> 00:14:47.776
My hands like i'm holding onto him because i couldn't make it without the praise
00:14:47.843 --> 00:14:49.111
Onto him because i couldn't make it without the praise and the worship saturating
00:14:49.178 --> 00:14:50.446
Make it without the praise and the worship saturating my heart and holding on
00:14:50.512 --> 00:14:51.613
And the worship saturating my heart and holding on to knowing that eternity
00:14:51.680 --> 00:14:52.881
My heart and holding on to knowing that eternity was going to be with my son.
00:14:52.948 --> 00:14:55.317
To knowing that eternity was going to be with my son. and god was going to carry me
00:14:55.384 --> 00:14:56.485
Was going to be with my son. and god was going to carry me through these moments that
00:14:56.552 --> 00:14:57.586
And god was going to carry me through these moments that i wouldn't have him
00:14:57.653 --> 00:14:58.654
Through these moments that i wouldn't have him on earth with me.
00:14:58.721 --> 00:14:59.722
I wouldn't have him on earth with me. tammy: i've been there
00:14:59.788 --> 00:15:00.889
So many times, m'lisa.
00:15:00.990 --> 00:15:02.958
So many times, m'lisa. you know, where i can
00:15:03.025 --> 00:15:04.326
So many times, m'lisa. you know, where i can remember being in church, too,
00:15:04.393 --> 00:15:05.861
You know, where i can remember being in church, too, and feeling like i just didn't
00:15:05.928 --> 00:15:07.062
Remember being in church, too, and feeling like i just didn't have the strength.
00:15:07.129 --> 00:15:09.732
Holding my own hand up
00:15:09.832 --> 00:15:11.734
Holding my own hand up one time because i'm like,
00:15:11.800 --> 00:15:13.035
Holding my own hand up one time because i'm like, i know that if i praise,
00:15:13.102 --> 00:15:14.570
One time because i'm like, i know that if i praise, if i worship, it will
00:15:14.636 --> 00:15:16.238
I know that if i praise, if i worship, it will push back the darkness
00:15:16.305 --> 00:15:17.606
If i worship, it will push back the darkness that i'm feeling right now.
00:15:17.673 --> 00:15:19.475
Push back the darkness that i'm feeling right now. i would i would tell myself,
00:15:19.541 --> 00:15:21.410
That i'm feeling right now. i would i would tell myself, even if you don't feel now
00:15:21.477 --> 00:15:23.612
I would i would tell myself, even if you don't feel now like you want to do this
00:15:23.679 --> 00:15:25.080
Even if you don't feel now like you want to do this or the presence of god,
00:15:25.147 --> 00:15:26.248
Like you want to do this or the presence of god, just push through it.
00:15:26.315 --> 00:15:28.117
Or the presence of god, just push through it. exactly.
00:15:28.183 --> 00:15:29.318
Just push through it. exactly. and i would just sometimes
00:15:29.385 --> 00:15:30.386
Exactly. and i would just sometimes just hold up my own hands
00:15:30.452 --> 00:15:31.754
And i would just sometimes just hold up my own hands till i could finally let go
00:15:31.820 --> 00:15:32.821
Just hold up my own hands till i could finally let go and find the strength to just
00:15:32.888 --> 00:15:33.922
Till i could finally let go and find the strength to just worship and praise god
00:15:33.989 --> 00:15:35.057
And find the strength to just worship and praise god in those moments.
00:15:35.124 --> 00:15:36.191
Worship and praise god in those moments. because it does push back
00:15:36.258 --> 00:15:37.393
In those moments. because it does push back the darkness.
00:15:37.459 --> 00:15:38.594
Because it does push back the darkness. that's exactly what you did
00:15:38.660 --> 00:15:39.928
The darkness. that's exactly what you did in that moment.
00:15:39.995 --> 00:15:41.730
That's exactly what you did in that moment. i think for people that feel
00:15:41.797 --> 00:15:44.500
In that moment. i think for people that feel so much pain right now,
00:15:44.566 --> 00:15:46.268
I think for people that feel so much pain right now, maybe feel like their life
00:15:46.335 --> 00:15:47.503
So much pain right now, maybe feel like their life is too messy, maybe they feel
00:15:47.569 --> 00:15:48.837
Maybe feel like their life is too messy, maybe they feel too far gone, you're the one
00:15:48.904 --> 00:15:50.372
Is too messy, maybe they feel too far gone, you're the one person, i think that could
00:15:50.439 --> 00:15:51.707
Too far gone, you're the one person, i think that could speak to them that might
00:15:51.774 --> 00:15:53.142
Person, i think that could speak to them that might feel like that.
00:15:53.208 --> 00:15:54.243
Speak to them that might feel like that. what would you say
00:15:54.309 --> 00:15:55.444
Feel like that. what would you say to somebody that just,
00:15:55.511 --> 00:15:57.046
What would you say to somebody that just, that just feels like
00:15:57.112 --> 00:15:58.514
To somebody that just, that just feels like it's great for her,
00:15:58.580 --> 00:15:59.648
That just feels like it's great for her, but it's too late for me.
00:15:59.715 --> 00:16:00.983
It's great for her, but it's too late for me. m'lisa: there isn't a life
00:16:01.050 --> 00:16:02.284
But it's too late for me. m'lisa: there isn't a life that's too far gone.
00:16:02.351 --> 00:16:03.585
M'lisa: there isn't a life that's too far gone. if anybody knows that,
00:16:03.652 --> 00:16:04.720
That's too far gone. if anybody knows that, i know that because
00:16:04.787 --> 00:16:06.388
If anybody knows that, i know that because i knew all the things
00:16:06.455 --> 00:16:07.623
I know that because i knew all the things to do right and i walked away.
00:16:07.689 --> 00:16:09.458
I knew all the things to do right and i walked away. it wasn't like i just did it
00:16:09.525 --> 00:16:10.592
To do right and i walked away. it wasn't like i just did it innocently, and like
00:16:10.659 --> 00:16:11.660
It wasn't like i just did it innocently, and like i didn't know better.
00:16:11.727 --> 00:16:12.761
Innocently, and like i didn't know better. i walked away, and i rejected
00:16:12.828 --> 00:16:16.231
I didn't know better. i walked away, and i rejected the life that i knew that
00:16:16.298 --> 00:16:17.332
I walked away, and i rejected the life that i knew that god had called me to.
00:16:17.399 --> 00:16:19.601
The life that i knew that god had called me to. when he was able
00:16:19.668 --> 00:16:21.003
God had called me to. when he was able to just wipe all that away
00:16:21.070 --> 00:16:22.771
When he was able to just wipe all that away and forgive me, i was like,
00:16:22.838 --> 00:16:24.406
To just wipe all that away and forgive me, i was like, who am i to ever even stand
00:16:24.473 --> 00:16:26.608
And forgive me, i was like, who am i to ever even stand in a pulpit and give him
00:16:26.675 --> 00:16:28.143
Who am i to ever even stand in a pulpit and give him the opportunity
00:16:28.210 --> 00:16:29.878
But i was like, man, okay,
00:16:31.480 --> 00:16:33.282
But i was like, man, okay, god, if you can do this
00:16:33.348 --> 00:16:34.817
God, if you can do this for me, as low as i've gone,
00:16:34.883 --> 00:16:36.351
For me, as low as i've gone, and i'm not even scratching
00:16:36.418 --> 00:16:37.453
And i'm not even scratching the surface of really where
00:16:37.519 --> 00:16:39.154
The surface of really where i went to in the darkness
00:16:39.221 --> 00:16:40.322
I was like, god, if you
00:16:41.423 --> 00:16:42.624
I was like, god, if you can do this for me,
00:16:42.691 --> 00:16:43.992
I was like, god, if you can do this for me, there isn't any person
00:16:44.059 --> 00:16:45.194
Can do this for me, there isn't any person that's too far gone.
00:16:45.260 --> 00:16:46.595
There isn't any person that's too far gone. every day when i didn't want
00:16:46.662 --> 00:16:48.063
That's too far gone. every day when i didn't want to get out of bed,
00:16:48.130 --> 00:16:49.131
Every day when i didn't want to get out of bed, when i didn't want
00:16:49.198 --> 00:16:50.299
To get out of bed, when i didn't want to keep living,
00:16:50.365 --> 00:16:51.366
When i didn't want to keep living, god's close to
00:16:51.433 --> 00:16:52.901
To keep living, god's close to the brokenhearted.
00:16:52.968 --> 00:16:54.103
God's close to the brokenhearted. he never leaves us.
00:16:54.169 --> 00:16:55.471
The brokenhearted. he never leaves us. he never forsakes.
00:16:55.537 --> 00:16:57.139
He never leaves us. he never forsakes. when we hold on to him,
00:16:57.206 --> 00:16:58.407
He never forsakes. when we hold on to him, he shows up for us every day
00:16:58.474 --> 00:17:01.043
When we hold on to him, he shows up for us every day in the little things.
00:17:01.110 --> 00:17:02.611
He shows up for us every day in the little things. the whispers, the moments,
00:17:02.678 --> 00:17:03.979
In the little things. the whispers, the moments, he's always there to bring
00:17:04.046 --> 00:17:05.747
The whispers, the moments, he's always there to bring that comfort and that peace
00:17:05.814 --> 00:17:07.449
He's always there to bring that comfort and that peace and that direction
00:17:07.516 --> 00:17:08.484
That comfort and that peace and that direction that we need in our life.
00:17:08.550 --> 00:17:09.585
And that direction that we need in our life. tammy: scripture says, he's
00:17:09.651 --> 00:17:10.652
That we need in our life. tammy: scripture says, he's near to the brokenhearted,
00:17:10.719 --> 00:17:12.020
Tammy: scripture says, he's near to the brokenhearted, but he saves those
00:17:12.087 --> 00:17:13.222
Near to the brokenhearted, but he saves those whose spirits are crushed.
00:17:13.288 --> 00:17:15.057
But he saves those whose spirits are crushed. and if you're watching today
00:17:15.124 --> 00:17:17.726
Whose spirits are crushed. and if you're watching today and you feel like your spirit
00:17:17.793 --> 00:17:19.995
And if you're watching today and you feel like your spirit is absolutely crushed,
00:17:20.062 --> 00:17:23.432
And you feel like your spirit is absolutely crushed, you've run out of words,
00:17:23.499 --> 00:17:25.167
Is absolutely crushed, you've run out of words, you don't even know
00:17:25.234 --> 00:17:26.468
You've run out of words, you don't even know what to pray anymore.
00:17:26.535 --> 00:17:27.769
You don't even know what to pray anymore. but you're sitting there
00:17:27.836 --> 00:17:28.971
What to pray anymore. but you're sitting there in that space
00:17:29.037 --> 00:17:31.039
But you're sitting there in that space and you're feeling something.
00:17:31.106 --> 00:17:33.408
In that space and you're feeling something. you're feeling a tug.
00:17:33.475 --> 00:17:36.778
And you're feeling something. you're feeling a tug. god is doing something
00:17:36.845 --> 00:17:38.180
You're feeling a tug. god is doing something in your life, in your heart
00:17:38.247 --> 00:17:39.448
God is doing something in your life, in your heart right now.
00:17:39.515 --> 00:17:40.516
In your life, in your heart right now. i believe holy spirit
00:17:40.582 --> 00:17:41.850
Right now. i believe holy spirit is wanting to set you free
00:17:41.917 --> 00:17:43.952
I believe holy spirit is wanting to set you free from whatever it is that took
00:17:44.019 --> 00:17:46.054
Is wanting to set you free from whatever it is that took from you, that tried to rob
00:17:46.121 --> 00:17:48.056
From whatever it is that took from you, that tried to rob from you, that stole from you.
00:17:48.123 --> 00:17:50.225
From you, that tried to rob from you, that stole from you. he's wanting to replace that
00:17:50.292 --> 00:17:52.327
From you, that stole from you. he's wanting to replace that with something that is whole.
00:17:52.394 --> 00:17:54.630
He's wanting to replace that with something that is whole. he wants to restore your life.
00:17:54.696 --> 00:17:56.465
With something that is whole. he wants to restore your life. he wants to restore the
00:17:56.532 --> 00:17:57.633
He wants to restore your life. he wants to restore the broken pieces of your life.
00:17:57.699 --> 00:17:59.368
He wants to restore the broken pieces of your life. he says that he will go
00:17:59.434 --> 00:18:01.069
Broken pieces of your life. he says that he will go everywhere he needs to go
00:18:01.136 --> 00:18:02.504
He says that he will go everywhere he needs to go to pick up
00:18:02.571 --> 00:18:03.872
Everywhere he needs to go to pick up those scattered pieces.
00:18:03.939 --> 00:18:05.073
To pick up those scattered pieces. everywhere that you have been
00:18:05.140 --> 00:18:06.408
Those scattered pieces. everywhere that you have been scattered and shattered,
00:18:06.475 --> 00:18:08.110
Everywhere that you have been scattered and shattered, he will pick every one
00:18:08.177 --> 00:18:09.311
Scattered and shattered, he will pick every one of them up,
00:18:09.378 --> 00:18:10.445
He will pick every one of them up, and he collects them in a jar,
00:18:10.512 --> 00:18:11.680
Of them up, and he collects them in a jar, in a bottle.
00:18:11.747 --> 00:18:12.881
And he collects them in a jar, in a bottle. he knows every single tear
00:18:12.948 --> 00:18:14.683
In a bottle. he knows every single tear that you have shed,
00:18:14.750 --> 00:18:16.084
He knows every single tear that you have shed, that you have cried.
00:18:16.151 --> 00:18:17.419
That you have shed, that you have cried. he's in every detail
00:18:17.486 --> 00:18:19.555
That you have cried. he's in every detail of your life right now.
00:18:19.621 --> 00:18:22.157
He's in every detail of your life right now. you might feel overlooked.
00:18:22.224 --> 00:18:23.492
Of your life right now. you might feel overlooked. you might feel abandoned,
00:18:23.559 --> 00:18:25.027
You might feel overlooked. you might feel abandoned, but you can never interpret
00:18:25.093 --> 00:18:26.428
You might feel abandoned, but you can never interpret your numbness as god's absence
00:18:26.495 --> 00:18:28.263
But you can never interpret your numbness as god's absence in your life.
00:18:28.330 --> 00:18:29.932
Your numbness as god's absence in your life. jesus is with you right now
00:18:29.998 --> 00:18:31.533
In your life. jesus is with you right now and i believe he wants
00:18:31.600 --> 00:18:32.935
Jesus is with you right now and i believe he wants to walk out whatever it is
00:18:33.001 --> 00:18:34.970
And i believe he wants to walk out whatever it is you're still hanging on to.
00:18:35.037 --> 00:18:37.239
To walk out whatever it is you're still hanging on to. you're still holding on,
00:18:37.306 --> 00:18:38.740
You're still hanging on to. you're still holding on, asking god to take it, but
00:18:38.807 --> 00:18:39.741
You're still holding on, asking god to take it, but you're still hanging on
00:18:39.808 --> 00:18:40.842
Asking god to take it, but you're still hanging on to just a little bit.
00:18:40.909 --> 00:18:41.843
You're still hanging on to just a little bit. let it go today.
00:18:41.910 --> 00:18:42.945
To just a little bit. let it go today. surrender everything.
00:18:43.011 --> 00:18:44.813
I want to let you know
00:18:46.415 --> 00:18:47.783
I want to let you know that we want to be here
00:18:47.849 --> 00:18:49.284
That we want to be here for you through that.
00:18:49.351 --> 00:18:50.385
For you through that. so how can we do that?
00:18:50.452 --> 00:18:51.920
So how can we do that? pick up the phone.
00:18:51.987 --> 00:18:53.088
Pick up the phone. call that number
00:18:53.155 --> 00:18:54.223
Call that number on your screen right now.
00:18:54.289 --> 00:18:55.557
On your screen right now. let us pray with you.
00:18:55.624 --> 00:18:56.758
Let us pray with you. we might not have all
00:18:56.825 --> 00:18:57.993
We might not have all the answers, but we do know
00:18:58.060 --> 00:18:59.695
The answers, but we do know the one that does,
00:18:59.761 --> 00:19:00.762
The one that does, and we will always point you
00:19:00.829 --> 00:19:02.030
And we will always point you to jesus, who will
00:19:02.097 --> 00:19:03.098
To jesus, who will be the answer to all
00:19:03.165 --> 00:19:04.433
Be the answer to all the questions you have.
00:19:04.499 --> 00:19:05.500
The questions you have. so let's start there.
00:19:05.567 --> 00:19:06.568
So let's start there. let us come alongside you
00:19:06.635 --> 00:19:07.903
Let us come alongside you and pray with you.
00:19:07.970 --> 00:19:08.971
And pray with you. if you feel without answers,
00:19:09.037 --> 00:19:10.305
If you feel without answers, we're going to pray
00:19:10.372 --> 00:19:11.373
We're going to pray with you today.
00:19:11.440 --> 00:19:12.441
With you today. go online.
00:19:12.507 --> 00:19:13.508
Go online. please make that call now!
00:19:13.575 --> 00:19:15.577
This book, it's not
00:19:17.045 --> 00:19:18.714
This book, it's not beyond hope by m'lisa goff,
00:19:18.814 --> 00:19:20.983
This book, it's not beyond hope by m'lisa goff, there's a lot of stuff
00:19:21.049 --> 00:19:22.117
Beyond hope by m'lisa goff, there's a lot of stuff we couldn't cover.
00:19:22.184 --> 00:19:23.218
There's a lot of stuff we couldn't cover. there might be some things
00:19:23.285 --> 00:19:24.386
We couldn't cover. there might be some things in this book that will be able
00:19:24.453 --> 00:19:25.754
There might be some things in this book that will be able to help you; some tools
00:19:25.821 --> 00:19:26.855
In this book that will be able to help you; some tools that she talked about that
00:19:26.922 --> 00:19:28.090
To help you; some tools that she talked about that she needed and didn't have,
00:19:28.156 --> 00:19:29.424
That she talked about that she needed and didn't have, they're going to be
00:19:29.491 --> 00:19:30.692
She needed and didn't have, they're going to be in the book to help you
00:19:30.759 --> 00:19:31.760
They're going to be in the book to help you walk this next season
00:19:31.827 --> 00:19:32.894
In the book to help you walk this next season of your life out.
00:19:32.961 --> 00:19:33.996
Walk this next season of your life out. so make sure to pick up
00:19:34.062 --> 00:19:35.097
Of your life out. so make sure to pick up a copy of that.
00:19:35.163 --> 00:19:36.398
And as i transition,
00:19:36.865 --> 00:19:38.100
The truth is there is a lot
00:19:38.166 --> 00:19:39.268
Of people in this world
00:19:39.334 --> 00:19:40.435
That feel like there's a lot
00:19:40.502 --> 00:19:41.503
Of pieces of their life
00:19:41.570 --> 00:19:42.571
Scattered all over,
00:19:42.638 --> 00:19:43.639
And they've been praying
00:19:43.705 --> 00:19:44.706
And looking for answers and
00:19:44.773 --> 00:19:45.774
Trusting god for provision,
00:19:45.841 --> 00:19:46.942
For healing, for restoration.
00:19:47.009 --> 00:19:48.844
And just as we sit here today,
00:19:48.910 --> 00:19:50.712
There are millions of people
00:19:50.779 --> 00:19:51.913
All around the world
00:19:51.980 --> 00:19:53.482
Who are struggling right now,
00:19:53.548 --> 00:19:55.117
Maybe asking god
00:19:55.183 --> 00:19:56.752
To come through,
00:19:56.818 --> 00:19:58.086
To be the answer.
00:19:58.153 --> 00:19:59.454
And he is the answer!
00:19:59.521 --> 00:20:00.656
He is the very source
00:20:00.722 --> 00:20:01.757
Of living water.
00:20:01.823 --> 00:20:03.058
What they need right now
00:20:03.125 --> 00:20:04.359
Is our help to step in,
00:20:04.426 --> 00:20:05.961
To say, we've got some tools
00:20:06.028 --> 00:20:07.462
And some answers for you.
00:20:07.529 --> 00:20:09.264
If you're listening today
00:20:09.331 --> 00:20:11.733
And you are in a position
00:20:11.800 --> 00:20:13.468
To give, then my heart
00:20:13.535 --> 00:20:15.237
Would just say,
00:20:15.304 --> 00:20:16.738
Would you just do it?
00:20:16.805 --> 00:20:18.006
Don't hesitate.
00:20:18.073 --> 00:20:19.107
Just step in.
00:20:19.174 --> 00:20:20.142
There are people in need
00:20:20.208 --> 00:20:21.243
Right now that need us
00:20:21.310 --> 00:20:22.444
Desperately.
00:20:22.511 --> 00:20:24.146
Let me tell you what
00:20:24.212 --> 00:20:25.147
That's going to look like.
00:20:25.213 --> 00:20:26.248
It's so simple.
00:20:26.315 --> 00:20:27.249
We're wanting to drill
00:20:27.316 --> 00:20:28.283
350 wells in 20 nations,
00:20:28.350 --> 00:20:30.485
And we can do it.
00:20:30.552 --> 00:20:31.486
We've drilled
00:20:31.553 --> 00:20:32.487
Over 8000 wells so far.
00:20:32.554 --> 00:20:33.488
It's an incredible
00:20:33.555 --> 00:20:34.723
Opportunity and outreach.
00:20:34.790 --> 00:20:36.558
But today, we need you
00:20:36.625 --> 00:20:37.959
To come alongside us.
00:20:38.026 --> 00:20:39.861
So, for $48, you will help
00:20:39.928 --> 00:20:42.030
Provide water for ten people
00:20:42.097 --> 00:20:43.832
For the rest of their lives.
00:20:43.899 --> 00:20:45.033
For $144, you will help
00:20:45.100 --> 00:20:47.002
Provide water for 30 people
00:20:47.069 --> 00:20:48.870
For the rest of their lives.
00:20:48.937 --> 00:20:50.005
If you can do today, $4,800,
00:20:50.072 --> 00:20:52.841
Guess what?
00:20:52.908 --> 00:20:53.909
You're going to drill a well
00:20:53.975 --> 00:20:55.310
For that entire village
00:20:55.377 --> 00:20:56.378
For probably about
00:20:56.445 --> 00:20:57.446
A thousand people for
00:20:57.512 --> 00:20:58.513
The rest of their lives.
00:20:58.580 --> 00:20:59.614
Come on!
00:20:59.681 --> 00:21:00.682
Let's get involved,
00:21:00.749 --> 00:21:01.750
Every one of us.
00:21:01.817 --> 00:21:02.818
Let's do something today
00:21:02.884 --> 00:21:03.885
To change the lives
00:21:03.952 --> 00:21:04.986
Of hundreds of thousands
00:21:05.053 --> 00:21:06.755
Of people around the world
00:21:06.822 --> 00:21:07.889
By bringing them
00:21:07.956 --> 00:21:09.057
Water for life.
00:21:09.124 --> 00:21:10.726
Every day, thousands of lives are lost
00:21:11.727 --> 00:21:13.895
To waterborne disease,
00:21:13.895 --> 00:21:15.964
And nearly half of those are children
00:21:15.964 --> 00:21:17.966
Under the age of five.
00:21:17.966 --> 00:21:20.001
Through mission: water for life
00:21:20.001 --> 00:21:22.104
You can give mothers hope and children a future
00:21:22.104 --> 00:21:24.339
As we provide clean, life-giving water
00:21:24.339 --> 00:21:26.675
For thousands of children and their families
00:21:26.675 --> 00:21:29.211
Before it's too late.
00:21:29.211 --> 00:21:31.213
With your gift today, you can help drill
00:21:31.213 --> 00:21:33.281
And establish 350 water wells this year.
00:21:33.281 --> 00:21:36.051
Your gift of $24
00:21:36.051 --> 00:21:38.120
Will help provide clean water for five children.
00:21:38.120 --> 00:21:40.389
A gift of $48 will help provide for ten.
00:21:40.389 --> 00:21:42.958
And $144 will help provide
00:21:42.958 --> 00:21:45.494
Life-giving water for 30 people
00:21:45.494 --> 00:21:47.496
For a lifetime.
00:21:47.496 --> 00:21:49.531
With a gift of any amount,
00:21:49.531 --> 00:21:51.566
We'll send you, prayers for my physical health,
00:21:51.566 --> 00:21:53.635
A bible-based collection of 52 prayers designed
00:21:53.635 --> 00:21:55.737
To bring strength, healing, and renewal to every area of your body
00:21:55.737 --> 00:21:59.541
Covering a wide range of physical needs.
00:21:59.541 --> 00:22:01.610
This beautifully crafted book encourages
00:22:01.610 --> 00:22:03.678
Intimate conversations with god.
00:22:03.678 --> 00:22:06.248
With a gift of $100 or more,
00:22:06.248 --> 00:22:08.383
You may request the "armor of god" tumbler set.
00:22:08.383 --> 00:22:11.153
These two 20-ounce stainless steel tumblers
00:22:11.153 --> 00:22:13.422
Each inscribed with ephesians 6:11
00:22:13.422 --> 00:22:15.657
Are a practical and meaningful way
00:22:15.657 --> 00:22:17.726
To carry a reminder of god's strength
00:22:17.726 --> 00:22:19.795
And protection throughout your day.
00:22:19.795 --> 00:22:21.963
Finally, please consider a gift of $1200
00:22:21.963 --> 00:22:24.699
To help provide water for 250 people
00:22:24.699 --> 00:22:27.335
Or a gift of $4800
00:22:27.335 --> 00:22:29.337
To help sponsor a complete well,
00:22:29.337 --> 00:22:31.373
And request our inspiring bronze sculpture,
00:22:31.373 --> 00:22:33.675
"lion of judah."
00:22:33.675 --> 00:22:35.744
Please call, write, or make your gift online today!
00:22:35.744 --> 00:22:41.716
Tammy: i hope you're going
00:22:41.817 --> 00:22:43.051
Tammy: i hope you're going online and giving the best
00:22:43.118 --> 00:22:44.219
Tammy: i hope you're going online and giving the best gift that god has laid
00:22:44.286 --> 00:22:45.487
Online and giving the best gift that god has laid on your heart today to give.
00:22:45.554 --> 00:22:47.322
Gift that god has laid on your heart today to give. i'm so glad that you're here.
00:22:47.389 --> 00:22:48.957
On your heart today to give. i'm so glad that you're here. wasn't this good?
00:22:49.024 --> 00:22:49.991
I'm so glad that you're here. wasn't this good? blynda: this was so good.
00:22:50.058 --> 00:22:51.159
Wasn't this good? blynda: this was so good. i mean, truly, your story
00:22:51.226 --> 00:22:53.261
Blynda: this was so good. i mean, truly, your story has been so enlightening
00:22:53.328 --> 00:22:55.497
I mean, truly, your story has been so enlightening and so encouraging.
00:22:55.564 --> 00:22:57.098
Has been so enlightening and so encouraging. but even you, tammy.
00:22:57.165 --> 00:22:58.767
And so encouraging. but even you, tammy. we were saying earlier,
00:22:58.834 --> 00:23:00.435
But even you, tammy. we were saying earlier, you both have experienced
00:23:00.502 --> 00:23:01.536
We were saying earlier, you both have experienced such devastating loss.
00:23:01.603 --> 00:23:03.171
You both have experienced such devastating loss. and to see the hope
00:23:03.238 --> 00:23:04.573
Such devastating loss. and to see the hope that resides in both of you.
00:23:04.639 --> 00:23:06.374
And to see the hope that resides in both of you. m'lisa, thank you so much
00:23:06.441 --> 00:23:07.542
That resides in both of you. m'lisa, thank you so much for joining us today.
00:23:07.609 --> 00:23:08.844
M'lisa, thank you so much for joining us today. i want to know where
00:23:08.910 --> 00:23:11.112
For joining us today. i want to know where can someone find this book?
00:23:11.179 --> 00:23:12.481
I want to know where can someone find this book? because it's not beyond hope
00:23:12.547 --> 00:23:13.849
Can someone find this book? because it's not beyond hope needs to be
00:23:13.915 --> 00:23:14.916
Because it's not beyond hope needs to be in everyone's hands.
00:23:14.983 --> 00:23:15.951
Needs to be in everyone's hands. not even just somebody
00:23:16.017 --> 00:23:17.018
In everyone's hands. not even just somebody who's gone through as much as
00:23:17.085 --> 00:23:18.320
Not even just somebody who's gone through as much as you've gone through, but
00:23:18.386 --> 00:23:19.488
Who's gone through as much as you've gone through, but every single one of us has
00:23:19.554 --> 00:23:20.689
You've gone through, but every single one of us has had brokenness in our lives.
00:23:20.755 --> 00:23:22.557
Every single one of us has had brokenness in our lives. we could all use
00:23:22.624 --> 00:23:24.125
Had brokenness in our lives. we could all use encouragement about hope.
00:23:24.192 --> 00:23:25.694
We could all use encouragement about hope. m'lisa: and they know
00:23:25.760 --> 00:23:27.062
Encouragement about hope. m'lisa: and they know somebody that they can
00:23:27.128 --> 00:23:28.263
M'lisa: and they know somebody that they can give the book to.
00:23:28.330 --> 00:23:29.564
Somebody that they can give the book to. that's what i love about it.
00:23:29.631 --> 00:23:30.765
But they can find it on
00:23:30.866 --> 00:23:31.967
But they can find it on my website: m'lisagoff.com.
00:23:32.033 --> 00:23:33.034
But they can find it on my website: m'lisagoff.com. or they can go straight
00:23:33.101 --> 00:23:34.102
My website: m'lisagoff.com. or they can go straight to amazon and just pull it up
00:23:34.169 --> 00:23:35.637
Or they can go straight to amazon and just pull it up and find it there.
00:23:35.704 --> 00:23:36.705
To amazon and just pull it up and find it there. tammy: get the book!
00:23:36.771 --> 00:23:37.772
And find it there. tammy: get the book! get the book!
00:23:37.839 --> 00:23:38.840
Tammy: get the book! get the book! girls, i'm glad you're here.
00:23:38.907 --> 00:23:39.908
Get the book! girls, i'm glad you're here. i'm glad you're here.
00:23:39.975 --> 00:23:40.976
I've had such a great time.
00:23:41.076 --> 00:23:42.277
I've had such a great time. i pray it was a blessing,
00:23:42.344 --> 00:23:43.578
I've had such a great time. i pray it was a blessing, in jesus' name, to every
00:23:43.645 --> 00:23:45.013
I pray it was a blessing, in jesus' name, to every single one of you today.
00:23:45.080 --> 00:23:46.715
In jesus' name, to every single one of you today. we'll see you next time
00:23:46.781 --> 00:23:47.816
Single one of you today. we'll see you next time on life today. goodbye.
00:23:47.883 --> 00:23:50.519
♪ how far is too far? ♪
00:24:07.602 --> 00:24:11.306
♪ i thought i'd be there by now ♪
00:24:11.306 --> 00:24:15.343
♪ followed shame to the place ♪
00:24:15.343 --> 00:24:19.347
♪ i was sure your grace ran out ♪
00:24:19.347 --> 00:24:23.151
♪ i kept running and running and running ♪
00:24:23.151 --> 00:24:26.988
♪ you kept chasing and chasing and chasing ♪
00:24:26.988 --> 00:24:31.760
♪ a million miles of my mistakes ♪
00:24:31.760 --> 00:24:35.797
♪ still couldn't keep your love away ♪
00:24:35.797 --> 00:24:39.801
♪ however far away i am from home ♪
00:24:39.801 --> 00:24:45.840
♪ that's how far your love will go ♪
00:24:45.840 --> 00:24:52.147
♪ go ♪
00:24:52.147 --> 00:24:56.918
♪ i turn around and i see ♪
00:24:57.652 --> 00:25:01.723
♪ pure compassion in your eyes ♪
00:25:01.723 --> 00:25:05.694
♪ savior's voice says to me ♪
00:25:05.694 --> 00:25:09.764
♪ "time to come back home, my child" ♪
00:25:09.764 --> 00:25:13.335
♪ so i came running and running and running ♪
00:25:13.335 --> 00:25:17.372
♪ and you kept reaching and reaching and reaching, ♪
00:25:17.372 --> 00:25:21.443
♪ lord, a million miles of my mistakes ♪
00:25:21.443 --> 00:25:26.247
♪ still couldn't keep your love away ♪
00:25:26.247 --> 00:25:30.251
♪ however far away i am from home ♪
00:25:30.251 --> 00:25:36.291
♪ that's how far your love will go ♪
00:25:36.291 --> 00:25:42.530
♪ go ♪
00:25:42.530 --> 00:25:46.368
♪ mercy's arms stretched open wide ♪
00:25:46.368 --> 00:25:52.607
♪ you paid it all ♪
00:25:52.607 --> 00:25:54.609
♪ what kind of love lays down his life? ♪
00:25:54.609 --> 00:26:00.682
♪ willing to cross ♪
00:26:00.682 --> 00:26:02.684
♪ a million miles of my mistakes ♪
00:26:02.684 --> 00:26:06.521
♪ still couldn't keep your love away ♪
00:26:06.521 --> 00:26:10.425
♪ however far away i am from home ♪
00:26:10.425 --> 00:26:16.598
♪ that's how far your love will go ♪
00:26:16.598 --> 00:26:22.437
♪ oh, i couldn't keep your love away ♪
00:26:22.437 --> 00:26:26.508
♪ however far away i am from home ♪
00:26:26.508 --> 00:26:32.714
♪ that's how far your love will go ♪
00:26:32.714 --> 00:26:41.022
♪ how far your love will go ♪
00:26:41.022 --> 00:26:45.593
♪ arms stretched open wide ♪
00:26:45.593 --> 00:26:48.863
♪ that's how far your love will go ♪
00:26:48.863 --> 00:26:52.100
♪ how far your love will go ♪
00:26:52.100 --> 00:26:56.938
♪ that's how far your love will go ♪
00:26:56.938 --> 00:27:01.576
>> this is not a strange part of a believer's life.
00:27:02.711 --> 00:27:05.513
This is something the holy spirit still does today.
00:27:05.513 --> 00:27:08.783
"the god you need to know" -- tomorrow!
00:27:08.783 --> 00:27:12.520
Life today is made possible by the supporters of life outreach international.
00:27:12.620 --> 00:27:16.157
Your gift will be used exclusively for the exempt purposes of life.
00:27:16.157 --> 00:27:19.260
The ministry features specific outreaches
00:27:19.260 --> 00:27:21.329
As examples of the programs it supports and conducts.
00:27:21.329 --> 00:27:23.398
Gifts are considered to be without restriction
00:27:23.398 --> 00:27:25.467
As to use unless explicitly stipulated by the donor.
00:27:25.467 --> 00:27:27.602
The ministry is a member of the ecfa.
00:27:27.602 --> 00:27:27.602

M'Lisa Goff - Shattered Dreams

August 4, 2025 | S25 E804 | 29:15

Closed captions

Share