Ed Young - A Great Marriage

February 9, 2025 | S25:E34

The Winning Walk with Dr. Ed Young is the international on-air and online teaching ministry of Dr. Ed Young. The Winning Walk proclaims the proven truth of God’s Word to give men and women the world over a winning way to live life.

#Peace #Relationships #Marriage #Religion #PromisesofGod #Joy #inActive #Anxiety #EdYoung #Rejoice #Husband #Wife #TheWinningWalkwithDr.EdYoung

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The Winning Walk with Dr. Ed Young | Ed Young - A Great Marriage | February 9, 2025

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♪♪♪
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Ed young: ladies and gentlemen, i was married for 58 years, and
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I had a great marriage.
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I've been married this christmas for two years, and i have a
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Great marriage.
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And i'm gonna tell you something, god intends for
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Everybody here to have a great marriage, and if you do not have
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One, you're not simply being obedient to god.
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Every year for a long time i've taken little, mini sabbaticals,
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And i leave this place, as i did a few weeks back, and i'm 4,000
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Miles from where i think paradise is for me.
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It's a time of re-creation, a time of recreation, and so lisa
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And i got on a plane, and we flew with a stop or two, going
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About 14 hours.
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I envy the fact and get mad about the fact that she, when we
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Take off, goes to sleep, bang, she wakes up when we arrive,
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Which is terribly frustrating to me, but a great gift to her.
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And so, we fly 4,000 miles to the spot that we would call our
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Little paradise.
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And we landed and went to costco.
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We just hoarded up on everything, from tissue to
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Different kinds of meat, all kind of stuff, some ice cream.
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And we arrived about an hour later at our little condo that
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We've been there, and we get out, unload all of costco,
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Now it's dark.
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Seems to be nobody else in the little condos in our building,
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There's four of them, we're one of them.
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And so we unload all there on the porch, and i say, "just open
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The door," and she said, "i don't have the key."
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And i said, "well i've got--"
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And i didn't have the key, oh yeah.
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"you didn't bring the key? i thought you had the key."
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"no, you're supposed to bring the key,
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I thought you had the key."
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We're this far from paradise.
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It is dark, costco was melting right there on the porch.
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I call the manager, not there, no answer, everything dark.
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I said, "oh, you know i've--i know, there's a hidden key under
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The little stool here on the porch, and where is the stool,"
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It's gone.
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There we are, one step from paradise.
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You've got the key, no, you've got the key,
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Marital conflict.
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We're gonna talk about marriage in a way that perhaps you've
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Never heard it before.
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We're in 1 corinthians chapter number 7, and it's all about
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Relationships, relationships, relationships.
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And the primary relationship after the relationship you and i
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Can have with god through jesus christ is marriage, because we
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In the church are--the bible tells us we are the very bride
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Of jesus christ.
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Marriage, that fabulous relationship.
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If you're single, you say, "well, this won't apply to me."
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It absolutely applies to you.
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If you're married, it absolutely applies to you, because there is
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A desire for paradise in marriage.
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Now, paul penned these words in 1 corinthians 7 when he was
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In prison.
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Now, one of the prison epistles, that's when he wrote
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These words.
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I've been to the place where he was in prison, many of you have,
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It's a dark place underground.
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How filthy, how horrific, but that's where paul was waiting
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For his execution, where he was later beheaded,
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And he wrote these words.
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And as i finally got into our little paradise, i looked for
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Scripture, i looked for scripture that would speak to me
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And take me through, as all of us now find ourselves, the one
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Powerful word that all of us have that determines so much
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Of where we are today.
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That is that big word that seems to be getting larger and larger,
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The word "anxiety," anxiety.
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And paul, did he have a reason to be anxious?
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Hello?
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And so i bumped into philippians chapter 4, i had read the
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Verses, but i used those verses and i want those verses to be
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Your theme and my theme for the next at least 12 months.
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Here is paul awaiting execution and death, and he writes,
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Philippians 4:4 through 8, and i presented this to some of our
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Leadership last sunday night.
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And paul says, "rejoice."
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Rejoice; again, i say, rejoice.
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The word "rejoice" means, re, joy joy, two joys.
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And i love joy as acrostic, jesus first, others second,
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Myself third, j-o--rejoice, joy, joy, joy, joy.
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And then paul, he compounds it, he says, again,
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I say joy, joy, rejoice.
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So it begins with joy, joy, joy, joy, oh, paul, and then he goes,
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He says, i want you to know that your gentle spirit, your gentle
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Spirit, should be known by everybody.
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I have a problem with the word "gentle," i don't naturally have
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A gentle spirit.
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But gentle i always likened to find it with the words of carl
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Sandburg, he talked about abraham lincoln, he said,
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"steel wrapped in velvet."
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That's the gentle spirit, and then he says, "the lord is
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Near," see the scripture, the lord is near, the lord is--
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He is, i'm not present.
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He said the lord is near, boy, if i could just know
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That at all times.
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And then he says, in nothing, there's nothing for you to be
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Anxious about, nothing?
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You mean paul there, waiting for execution, he says to us today
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In this moment of extremity in the history of the world, there
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Is nothing for you to be anxious about?
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Well, paul, how does that operate?
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He says in everything, in everything.
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And as i have sat down this verse i've made a list of all of
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That which i'm anxious about, and i said,
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"lord, in everything, we have no reason to be anxious?
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What happens, how do you do that?"
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He says, by prayer, that's listing those anxieties, and,
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Boy, i've got a list.
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And by supplication, that means with passionate prayer, don't
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Just say words, put flesh and blood on those words, with
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Passion prayer, with--and with thanksgiving.
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Let your request be made known to god, that's it.
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Righteous, let your requests be known with god, and then here
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Comes the dogmatic answer.
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The peace of god, phew, will rule your heart.
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Would you like that to happen?
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And will rule your mind, oh, in christ jesus.
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And then he says, as a result of that, he said, therefore, then
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He has a beautiful list that is there, a beautiful list.
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He says, "whatever is true."
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Truth is a powerful thing.
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It's becoming increasingly scarce in our time.
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We think truth is not objective, it's subjective, how we
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Spin it, no, it's not.
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Paul says, "whatever is true," he said,
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"whatever is honorable," honorable.
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He said, "whatever is right," you see it, right, and,
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"whatever is pure."
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Boy, purity, without alloy, not mixed up, whatever is pure,
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"whatever's lovely."
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I have a problem with the word lovely, it's a feminine word to
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Me, but we know what is lovely.
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Whatever is good repute, whatever has a good reputation,
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And he says, "if there is any excellence."
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God's people and god's church should be about excellence.
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If you see anything going on around this place, i don't care
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Whether it's the ground, i don't care whether it's the buildings,
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I don't care whether it's a bible study, i don't care
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Whether it's a worship, if it is not seeped in trying to be
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Excellent for god almighty, you let me know.
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We are about excellence to honor the lord.
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He said, "whatever is excellent," by the way, that's a
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Classical greek word, and you could take it and unpack
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It for a week.
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We don't use it much, what has excellence.
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And whatever is worthy of praise, god's praise,
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God's approval, god's favor.
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He said, we are to think, we're to dwell, we're to meditate
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On these things.
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My goodness, ladies and gentlemen, that is a promise
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From god almighty himself.
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If i give you my word i'm going to do something, there's a
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Possibility i might forget, there's a possibility i will
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Lead up and accomplish that which i said, but i would try to
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My utmost to do that.
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But when god gives his promise: here's anxiety, i offer you
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Peace, guard your heart, guard your mind, you can book it.
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God has never in the bible, in time, in place, in history, at
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Any time broken a single promise that he has made.
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He is god, and he is 100% with his promises.
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Now, i left out one word, one big word, at least,
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In our study.
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You see the word, brethren, brothers?
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That means this promise is not for everybody on the planet.
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It's for those who are part of the brethren, who are in christ,
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Who are christians, genuine christians, real christians.
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And we define christianity, of course, as conviction of sin,
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Repentance of sin, receiving jesus christ in our life,
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Putting our flag up publicly for him, that is a general
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Definition for christian, but what do we have, what do you
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Have, what do i have that we can identify and say that is the
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Result of that profession of faith and what we've done
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In receiving christ?
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What do we have?
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And then we run into the word we don't use much, but we quote it
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Quickly in john 3:16, "for god so loved the world that he gave
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His only begotten," we don't use the word 'begotten, that's sort
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Of an old king james "begotten," but we know what it means.
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We know that human beings beget human beings, right?
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Lions beget lions, bears beget-- we beget that which
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Is of our kind.
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But it says, our only begotten son.
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Somewhere, god the father in pre-time and pre-history, his
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Son was begotten, and divinity begets divinity,
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Do you follow me?
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Divinity begets divinity, humanity begets humanity, and
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Therefore in one sense, we're all made in the image of god,
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Everybody on this earth, we are brothers and sisters in nature,
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We're biologically human beings, homo sapiens, we know that, but
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When we receive christ, we receive something else, we
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Receive his spirit, and now we're not only biologically, but
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We are literally in the family of god, because when we receive
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Jesus christ as our savior and our lord, zoe, zoe comes in us,
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And that's eternal.
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So, we're not only biologically begotten, follow me, but now
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Spiritually we're begotten, and we have now divinity within us.
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This biological body is gonna run down, anybody
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Wanna debate that a little while?
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I mean, that's true, but that zoe, when we've been begotten by
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The father through jesus christ, that is being born again, and
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Now in you and me, we're not only begotten as humans, but
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We're begotten by god through christ, and now we have that
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Divinity within us that lasts forever.
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And we're gonna discover in 1 corinthians 15, this little zoe
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In you and me, it's gonna have an eternal body when we leave
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This earth.
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And so, what happens, and now we as the christian, we have
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Something that's in this world, but out of this world, something
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That is not transient, but something that is absolutely
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Permanent in all time.
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A man, we can take and make a statue that looks like a
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Human being.
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Now, if we could speak or god could speak and make that statue
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Come alive, whoo, would that be miraculous?
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That is not nearly as miraculous as when you and i receive jesus
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Christ, and now we have zoe in us, and we come to
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Life everlasting.
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That's what it is to be a christian, that's what we have,
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And as christians, we can go as part of the brethren, their
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Brother and sister in the family of christ, and the church is the
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Bride of christ itself.
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Now, we can go and claim philippians 4:4.
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Anxious about nothing, the peace of god comes, my my, it's
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There for us, it's a fabulous thing, and then you come back to
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What we're going to be dealing with, the most powerful,
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Important relationship we have as human beings in this life
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Outside of the vertical relationship with christ
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Is marriage.
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It's marriage, powerful thing,
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Two become one, ho,
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Powerful thing.
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And we're going to be walking around in this most powerful,
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Sacred relationship that man has given to us--that god has given
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Us, that god has given to man, and there are only three kind
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Of marriages.
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Only three, there are bad marriages, there are okay
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Marriages, and there are great marriages.
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What kind of marriage do you have?
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Tell you what a bad marriage is, a bad marriage is described in
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Many places, but particularly in proverbs chapter 27, and that
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Verse says, a wife that nags is like a drip, drip, drip, drip,
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Drip, drip, drip, drip, drip.
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The same thing is true for a husband who nags, is like
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Drip, drip drip.
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It's not good enough, it's not big enough, it's not important
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Enough, it's not significant enough, you didn't satisfy, and
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You're born in a negative mindscape.
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Drip, drip, drip, drip, drip, drip, drip.
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That will lead to a bad marriage, and it is a
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Bad marriage.
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By the way, i want you to look in the mirror as we deal with
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Marriage, and ask yourself continually one question,
00:18:28.252 --> 00:18:31.255
What's it like being married to me?
00:18:31.255 --> 00:18:36.027
Sit down on that one, get your pen and paper out, and just
00:18:36.027 --> 00:18:39.463
Answer that honestly, or if you really want to handle it,
00:18:39.463 --> 00:18:42.700
Ask your partner.
00:18:42.700 --> 00:18:48.339
Drip, drip, drip, drip.
00:18:48.339 --> 00:18:51.142
You'll lose all your joy.
00:18:51.142 --> 00:18:53.544
Actually, a bad marriage is joy reversed.
00:18:53.544 --> 00:18:58.482
If jesus, others, yourself, it is putting yourself first,
00:18:58.482 --> 00:19:04.155
Putting yourself first in that relationship.
00:19:04.155 --> 00:19:08.593
When i was studying this passage, this is amazing to me,
00:19:08.593 --> 00:19:12.563
I'm sitting on the couch where i don't usually sit when i'm
00:19:12.563 --> 00:19:15.199
Studying, and i'm thinking about rejoice, you lose your joy, bad
00:19:15.199 --> 00:19:19.737
Marriages, myself, yourself first, myself first, and winston
00:19:19.737 --> 00:19:25.042
Comes up and starts barking,
00:19:25.042 --> 00:19:27.278
[dog noises]
00:19:27.278 --> 00:19:29.146
What's the matter with you?
00:19:29.146 --> 00:19:30.615
[dog noises]
00:19:30.615 --> 00:19:31.949
What in the world?
00:19:31.949 --> 00:19:33.784
And i realized that i was sitting on the place in the
00:19:33.784 --> 00:19:38.422
Couch that he normally sits.
00:19:38.422 --> 00:19:42.727
You know, after all he's a king charles spaniel.
00:19:42.727 --> 00:19:47.164
So i said, i get it, so i move, true story, he jumped up there.
00:19:47.164 --> 00:19:53.404
On my couch, i have a little pillow that says, rejoice.
00:19:53.404 --> 00:19:57.441
I'd forgotten it was there, i'll be honest with you.
00:19:57.441 --> 00:19:59.944
Winston immediately takes that pillow, and just takes his nose
00:19:59.944 --> 00:20:04.015
And knocks it off the couch.
00:20:04.015 --> 00:20:07.084
I cannot make it up, and i thought, my glory, i'm looking
00:20:07.084 --> 00:20:12.723
For an illustration of a bad marriage, and here you got it,
00:20:12.723 --> 00:20:15.660
Because it is when one or another, our partner, they sit
00:20:15.660 --> 00:20:19.463
On their own throne, and it's all about yourself.
00:20:19.463 --> 00:20:27.138
And we know, we've already talked about the wives will be
00:20:27.138 --> 00:20:30.374
Cheerleaders to their husbands, we have, gentlemen, we're so
00:20:30.374 --> 00:20:33.944
Thin skinned, we need to be cheered for, and husbands are to
00:20:33.944 --> 00:20:36.881
Genuinely cherish their wives.
00:20:36.881 --> 00:20:40.518
And you don't sit on the throne of authority in your marriage,
00:20:40.518 --> 00:20:44.989
Your mate does, your mate does.
00:20:44.989 --> 00:20:48.159
It's not selfishness; it's selflessness.
00:20:48.159 --> 00:20:52.063
And when selfishness comes in,
00:20:52.063 --> 00:20:54.999
[dog noises]
00:20:54.999 --> 00:20:56.400
Nag, nag, nag, nag, that's a bad marriage.
00:20:56.400 --> 00:20:59.837
What's an okay marriage?
00:20:59.837 --> 00:21:03.441
Okay marriage, listen carefully, is when there is no longer any
00:21:03.441 --> 00:21:09.080
Fighting or fussing, oh.
00:21:09.080 --> 00:21:13.351
When fighting and fussing is eliminated, you just have an
00:21:13.351 --> 00:21:17.555
Okay marriage.
00:21:17.555 --> 00:21:19.156
You say, boy, that's kind of weird, isn't--no, it's a
00:21:19.156 --> 00:21:22.893
Picture of a okay marriage, standoff.
00:21:22.893 --> 00:21:26.764
It's a picture of a marriage that has moved into the
00:21:26.764 --> 00:21:29.734
Deadliest posture of apathy.
00:21:29.734 --> 00:21:33.671
I've talked to a lot of--a lot of couples through the years
00:21:33.671 --> 00:21:36.474
About marriage, when they come in, they're at each other's
00:21:36.474 --> 00:21:39.143
Throat, they're arguing, they're presenting their case and their
00:21:39.143 --> 00:21:41.846
Side, man, there's hope for that marriage, but when they both sit
00:21:41.846 --> 00:21:46.183
There and say, "i don't care what he does, i'm not interested
00:21:46.183 --> 00:21:50.888
In her," and you're together, but you're far apart, there's
00:21:50.888 --> 00:21:55.593
No communication.
00:21:55.593 --> 00:21:57.661
Any intimate relationship is mechanical.
00:21:57.661 --> 00:22:00.731
There's no sharing, you're going in the same direction, but you
00:22:00.731 --> 00:22:05.403
Don't have the same goals, and there's a coldness and a
00:22:05.403 --> 00:22:08.873
Hollowness, and a--just, we're gonna just get along
00:22:08.873 --> 00:22:12.176
And survive.
00:22:12.176 --> 00:22:15.146
And this is also joy reversed, because now there are other
00:22:15.146 --> 00:22:18.883
Things, maybe kids, it may be friendship, it may be hobbies,
00:22:18.883 --> 00:22:24.021
That it comes before your number-one priority, which is
00:22:24.021 --> 00:22:27.458
The person who is your mate unto god for life.
00:22:27.458 --> 00:22:30.461
And that's what happens in a okay marriage.
00:22:30.461 --> 00:22:34.532
No longer any fighting or fussing, dangerous place,
00:22:34.532 --> 00:22:38.636
Apathy sets in.
00:22:38.636 --> 00:22:41.605
Well, what about a great marriage?
00:22:41.605 --> 00:22:45.142
A great marriage, we're gonna be talking about bad marriages,
00:22:45.142 --> 00:22:48.212
Okay marriages, and great marriages for weeks to come,
00:22:48.212 --> 00:22:50.714
But a great marriage is weeding and sowing.
00:22:50.714 --> 00:22:58.055
You weed things out of your life and your--
00:22:58.055 --> 00:23:00.825
You want a list for this?
00:23:00.825 --> 00:23:02.426
Galatians 5, you weed things out, you weed things out, you
00:23:02.426 --> 00:23:07.231
Have to do that, and then you plant, then you sow, you're
00:23:07.231 --> 00:23:09.834
Weeding and you're planting, you're weeding and you're
00:23:09.834 --> 00:23:11.902
Planning, it's an ongoing process to have a
00:23:11.902 --> 00:23:15.606
Great marriage.
00:23:15.606 --> 00:23:18.442
It's a beautiful thing to have a great marriage, and when you
00:23:18.442 --> 00:23:23.247
Both think the other hold the key to paradise, by the way, let
00:23:23.247 --> 00:23:27.518
Me take you back to costco on the porch, darkness.
00:23:27.518 --> 00:23:35.826
And finally, she laughs, i'm mad, but i laugh.
00:23:38.629 --> 00:23:45.636
You're supposed to have the key, i'm supposed to have the key to
00:23:45.636 --> 00:23:47.972
Paradise, and then i look up, and there's a little window
00:23:47.972 --> 00:23:52.142
Up there.
00:23:52.142 --> 00:23:53.844
I said, "huh, i wonder if i could crawl up through
00:23:53.844 --> 00:23:58.182
That window."
00:23:58.182 --> 00:24:00.751
So, she tries to help me up and my shoulders were too wide, and
00:24:00.751 --> 00:24:05.856
Then i said, "well, let me help you," and i get her up, and we
00:24:05.856 --> 00:24:10.194
Go and we stand on this rickety chair, and she gets up there,
00:24:10.194 --> 00:24:14.164
And thank goodness for swimming and a little yoga through the
00:24:14.164 --> 00:24:17.434
Years, and she gets her head and her shoulders through, and
00:24:17.434 --> 00:24:21.171
Finally she gets the others through, and somehow she spins
00:24:21.171 --> 00:24:24.308
Around and drops down the other side.
00:24:24.308 --> 00:24:28.345
"how are you?"
00:24:28.345 --> 00:24:29.680
"fine," and she goes around
00:24:29.680 --> 00:24:33.150
And opens the door to paradise.
00:24:33.150 --> 00:24:41.225
It took both of us.
00:24:41.225 --> 00:24:44.328
I didn't have the key, she didn't have the key, it took
00:24:44.328 --> 00:24:47.131
Both of us, and all of us are married, sometime we have to go
00:24:47.131 --> 00:24:50.601
Through those narrow places, but we have to go through
00:24:50.601 --> 00:24:54.371
Those places together.
00:24:54.371 --> 00:24:57.508
The secret, the beginning of a great marriage, you weed and you
00:24:57.508 --> 00:25:00.711
Plant, you weed and you plant, and weeds come up, and you pull
00:25:00.711 --> 00:25:03.681
Them up, and you plant, and you do it together.
00:25:03.681 --> 00:25:07.985
Female: we have the promise that god
00:25:08.052 --> 00:25:09.620
Will direct all our paths.
00:25:09.620 --> 00:25:11.722
Male: plus the guarantee of a long life.
00:25:11.722 --> 00:25:13.857
Female: the assurance of our family's protection.
00:25:13.857 --> 00:25:16.260
Male: the promise of creative wisdom.
00:25:16.260 --> 00:25:17.695
Female: and he will never leave us or forsake us.
00:25:17.695 --> 00:25:20.798
Male announcer: the promises of god are available
00:25:20.798 --> 00:25:22.366
For all believers in christ.
00:25:22.366 --> 00:25:24.668
Each day is an opportunity to live in the fullness of what
00:25:24.668 --> 00:25:27.104
He's already pledged to us in his word.
00:25:27.104 --> 00:25:30.074
Now in this beautiful hard-bound edition,
00:25:30.074 --> 00:25:32.276
Dr. young shares a full year of inspirational thoughts with a
00:25:32.276 --> 00:25:35.613
Daily promise from god's word.
00:25:35.613 --> 00:25:38.148
In a few minutes each day, you'll see just how much god has
00:25:38.148 --> 00:25:41.218
Already provided for you and your family.
00:25:41.218 --> 00:25:43.887
It's a wonderful book of encouragement for you,
00:25:43.887 --> 00:25:46.924
Or the perfect gift for someone else.
00:25:46.924 --> 00:25:49.393
To get your copy, call the number on your screen,
00:25:49.393 --> 00:25:51.929
Or go online at winningwalk.org.
00:25:51.929 --> 00:25:54.765
It's our gift to you for your financial
00:25:54.765 --> 00:25:56.533
Support of this ministry.
00:25:56.533 --> 00:25:58.736
Live each day to its fullest,
00:25:58.736 --> 00:26:01.271
Standing on the promises of god's word.
00:26:01.271 --> 00:26:03.941
Dr. young: marriage is god's idea.
00:26:05.976 --> 00:26:07.911
It is sacred and fabulous, and outside of our relationship with
00:26:07.911 --> 00:26:11.715
The lord, marriage is the most significant relationship
00:26:11.715 --> 00:26:15.586
We will ever have.
00:26:15.586 --> 00:26:17.821
But do you know that the number one problem most of us have when
00:26:17.821 --> 00:26:21.959
It comes to our marriage: selfishness.
00:26:21.959 --> 00:26:26.897
Selfishness is what keeps us immature,
00:26:26.897 --> 00:26:29.633
Insensitive, and stubborn, and that is not a recipe
00:26:29.633 --> 00:26:33.170
For a great marriage, is it?
00:26:33.170 --> 00:26:36.674
We're all too skillful at looking after ourselves and
00:26:36.674 --> 00:26:40.210
Trying to make us look better.
00:26:40.210 --> 00:26:42.880
So what's the answer?
00:26:42.880 --> 00:26:44.415
It's to get the self off the throne and to
00:26:44.415 --> 00:26:47.718
Surrender to jesus christ.
00:26:47.718 --> 00:26:49.887
Just let him take control of your life.
00:26:49.887 --> 00:26:52.856
Are you ready to do that?
00:26:52.856 --> 00:26:54.758
Then call the number on your screen.
00:26:54.758 --> 00:26:56.827
We would be thrilled to talk with you and to pray with you
00:26:56.827 --> 00:27:00.431
And thank you for studying god's word,
00:27:00.431 --> 00:27:03.100
By the way, with me today.
00:27:03.100 --> 00:27:05.769
And i'll see you here next time when we take another exciting
00:27:05.769 --> 00:27:08.972
Step on the winning walk with jesus christ.
00:27:08.972 --> 00:27:12.743
♪♪♪
00:27:12.743 --> 00:27:20.851
Cc by aberdeen captioning 1-800-688-6621 www.aberdeen.io
00:27:20.851 --> 00:27:27.991

Ed Young - A Great Marriage

February 9, 2025 | S25:E34

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