Ed Young - What Every Husband Needs To Know

July 8, 2026 | 27:29

The Winning Walk with Dr. Ed Young is the international on-air and online teaching ministry of Dr. Ed Young. The Winning Walk proclaims the proven truth of God’s Word to give men and women the world over a winning way to live life.

Closed captions

Show Timecode
The Winning Walk with Dr. Ed Young | Ed Young - What Every Husband Needs To Know | July 8, 2026
  • That men
  • 00:00:00.924 --> 00:00:01.858
  • Are buffaloes and women are butterflies.
  • 00:00:01.858 --> 00:00:04.561
  • I like that, guys.
  • 00:00:04.994 --> 00:00:06.930
  • We're a buffalo. we just.
  • 00:00:06.930 --> 00:00:09.799
  • Man, we just brutes.
  • 00:00:10.266 --> 00:00:13.403
  • Women are butterflies.
  • 00:00:13.403 --> 00:00:16.539
  • Oh, they just fly around.
  • 00:00:16.539 --> 00:00:18.108
  • I mean, they're multicolored.
  • 00:00:18.108 --> 00:00:19.709
  • We're just.
  • 00:00:19.709 --> 00:00:21.411
  • We just are lugs.
  • 00:00:21.411 --> 00:00:24.147
  • Boy, it's hard for a butterfly to communicate
  • 00:00:25.014 --> 00:00:27.350
  • With a buffalo and a buffalo to mediate with a butterfly.
  • 00:00:27.350 --> 00:00:30.553
  • That's the challenge we have.
  • 00:00:30.553 --> 00:00:32.489
  • So, guys, we are charged by god to understand our wives,
  • 00:00:32.489 --> 00:00:38.194
  • To see what makes them tick, to to
  • 00:00:38.194 --> 00:00:41.164
  • To work through these things, to listen enough to love enough
  • 00:00:41.164 --> 00:00:44.801
  • To care enough to give ourselves up enough
  • 00:00:44.801 --> 00:00:47.437
  • To lead in an understanding way,
  • 00:00:47.437 --> 00:01:08.458
  • 80 to 90% of problems
  • 00:01:08.958 --> 00:01:11.261
  • In marriages.
  • 00:01:11.261 --> 00:01:14.097
  • The number one problem is the husband.
  • 00:01:14.097 --> 00:01:17.033
  • The guy.
  • 00:01:17.300 --> 00:01:18.902
  • The man.
  • 00:01:18.902 --> 00:01:26.743
  • A silent vote of confidence.
  • 00:01:27.343 --> 00:01:32.815
  • Why is that?
  • 00:01:33.149 --> 00:01:35.785
  • Guys, we are meat heads.
  • 00:01:35.785 --> 00:01:39.088
  • We are narcissistic,
  • 00:01:39.556 --> 00:01:41.858
  • Egotistical, prideful, out of touch,
  • 00:01:41.858 --> 00:01:47.030
  • Generally cold hearted lugs who don't get it.
  • 00:01:47.030 --> 00:01:52.168
  • We don't understand.
  • 00:01:52.635 --> 00:01:54.504
  • Most of us here who are married,
  • 00:01:54.504 --> 00:01:56.839
  • What marriage is all about,
  • 00:01:56.839 --> 00:02:00.510
  • And therefore marriages are failing all around us.
  • 00:02:00.510 --> 00:02:03.980
  • And 8,090% of the time you could say
  • 00:02:03.980 --> 00:02:07.984
  • It's because of the husband.
  • 00:02:07.984 --> 00:02:11.387
  • That's the way it is now.
  • 00:02:11.955 --> 00:02:16.826
  • What did marriage come from?
  • 00:02:17.427 --> 00:02:20.096
  • Well, i just guess it came up through culture and history,
  • 00:02:20.096 --> 00:02:23.466
  • I don't know.
  • 00:02:23.466 --> 00:02:24.467
  • Marriage is a gift from god.
  • 00:02:24.467 --> 00:02:29.072
  • It's god's gift.
  • 00:02:29.472 --> 00:02:31.541
  • It's not good for man to be alone.
  • 00:02:31.541 --> 00:02:34.377
  • Man and woman created he them.
  • 00:02:34.978 --> 00:02:38.114
  • Marriage is a gift from god.
  • 00:02:38.715 --> 00:02:41.618
  • Did god give us this gift and just say
  • 00:02:42.452 --> 00:02:45.421
  • Lots of luck?
  • 00:02:45.421 --> 00:02:48.391
  • Nothing upsets me more when somebody says
  • 00:02:49.225 --> 00:02:52.495
  • I've just been lucky in my marriage.
  • 00:02:52.495 --> 00:02:55.898
  • Luck has nothing to do with it, gentlemen.
  • 00:02:55.898 --> 00:03:00.903
  • Not a thing in the world now.
  • 00:03:01.537 --> 00:03:04.474
  • If we had to put a puzzle together.
  • 00:03:05.241 --> 00:03:09.379
  • This is a child's puzzle
  • 00:03:09.379 --> 00:03:12.382
  • Of a hundred pieces for five year
  • 00:03:12.382 --> 00:03:15.251
  • Olds and up.
  • 00:03:15.251 --> 00:03:20.957
  • Most men and women here
  • 00:03:21.457 --> 00:03:22.759
  • Could put this puzzle together without the box top.
  • 00:03:22.759 --> 00:03:27.964
  • We could put together.
  • 00:03:28.431 --> 00:03:29.599
  • Probably most women could put together in about an hour.
  • 00:03:29.599 --> 00:03:33.636
  • Those guys we could put together about three hours
  • 00:03:33.636 --> 00:03:37.407
  • Without the box top to look at.
  • 00:03:38.041 --> 00:03:40.209
  • We could put together only 100 pieces.
  • 00:03:40.209 --> 00:03:42.111
  • We'd eventually figure that out, guys.
  • 00:03:42.111 --> 00:03:44.480
  • Yeah.
  • 00:03:44.480 --> 00:03:45.014
  • We would.
  • 00:03:45.014 --> 00:03:48.151
  • By the same token.
  • 00:03:48.151 --> 00:03:51.454
  • If you had a puzzle with,
  • 00:03:52.021 --> 00:03:54.424
  • Say, 20,000 pieces.
  • 00:03:54.424 --> 00:03:57.460
  • 20,000 pieces
  • 00:03:57.827 --> 00:04:00.930
  • And their little pieces and we said,
  • 00:04:00.930 --> 00:04:04.033
  • Well, put that together without having a picture.
  • 00:04:04.033 --> 00:04:06.936
  • Don't have a picture, just put it together all
  • 00:04:06.936 --> 00:04:09.238
  • 20,000 pieces.
  • 00:04:09.238 --> 00:04:10.640
  • I don't know if that's possible
  • 00:04:10.640 --> 00:04:14.143
  • In a lifetime
  • 00:04:14.510 --> 00:04:17.347
  • To put a 20,000
  • 00:04:17.347 --> 00:04:18.981
  • Piece, a 30,000, 40,000 piece puzzle together
  • 00:04:18.981 --> 00:04:22.352
  • With no picture, with little bitty
  • 00:04:22.352 --> 00:04:25.121
  • Pieces.
  • 00:04:25.121 --> 00:04:28.224
  • Impossible.
  • 00:04:28.558 --> 00:04:31.461
  • But a lot of us think that marriage
  • 00:04:31.461 --> 00:04:33.730
  • Is like putting together a child's puzzle.
  • 00:04:33.730 --> 00:04:35.698
  • That here somebody who's intelligent
  • 00:04:35.698 --> 00:04:38.134
  • And i married somebody, the wife would say,
  • 00:04:38.134 --> 00:04:40.136
  • Who's reasonably intelligent.
  • 00:04:40.136 --> 00:04:41.771
  • And surely we can work out all these problems and decision
  • 00:04:41.771 --> 00:04:45.775
  • To put the puzzle of marriage together.
  • 00:04:45.775 --> 00:04:47.710
  • If we use common sense and we're basically good people
  • 00:04:47.710 --> 00:04:50.613
  • And we are, quote, christian and quote.
  • 00:04:50.613 --> 00:04:54.350
  • But that's not the way it is, folks.
  • 00:04:55.118 --> 00:04:58.054
  • Marriage involves 20,000
  • 00:04:58.588 --> 00:05:01.190
  • Different choices, 20,000 different pieces.
  • 00:05:01.190 --> 00:05:03.559
  • And then some decisions, attitudes, emotions, children,
  • 00:05:03.559 --> 00:05:09.265
  • Money, living all the multiplicity of things.
  • 00:05:09.265 --> 00:05:13.369
  • And so many of us in our marriages could be told
  • 00:05:13.369 --> 00:05:16.372
  • By the one word conflict that would describe it.
  • 00:05:16.372 --> 00:05:19.275
  • Conflict.
  • 00:05:19.275 --> 00:05:21.110
  • Conflict.
  • 00:05:21.411 --> 00:05:23.379
  • Disagree on everything.
  • 00:05:23.379 --> 00:05:25.214
  • Argue about everything.
  • 00:05:25.214 --> 00:05:27.049
  • Resolve nothing.
  • 00:05:27.049 --> 00:05:29.318
  • And therefore it is the male primarily
  • 00:05:29.318 --> 00:05:33.089
  • Who takes it all in and stuffs it all down, has all the ego,
  • 00:05:33.089 --> 00:05:37.026
  • All the narcissistic tendencies.
  • 00:05:37.026 --> 00:05:39.195
  • And we just say, when i've married the wrong person.
  • 00:05:39.195 --> 00:05:43.299
  • And the truth is, the success of a marriage
  • 00:05:43.299 --> 00:05:47.303
  • Primarily is on the male in the bible.
  • 00:05:47.303 --> 00:05:52.475
  • Three times
  • 00:05:52.475 --> 00:05:53.309
  • It is said
  • 00:05:53.309 --> 00:05:54.477
  • The man is to love his wife, not what time do you find
  • 00:05:54.477 --> 00:05:57.713
  • The bible saying a wife is a lover husband?
  • 00:05:57.713 --> 00:06:00.616
  • Oh, what we hope she does, we we should.
  • 00:06:01.451 --> 00:06:04.387
  • But it is the husband who takes the initiative
  • 00:06:04.387 --> 00:06:08.257
  • To find forgiveness.
  • 00:06:08.257 --> 00:06:09.392
  • It is the husband who says i am wrong, is a husband
  • 00:06:09.392 --> 00:06:12.795
  • Who tries to fill the breaches that happens in relationships.
  • 00:06:12.795 --> 00:06:18.167
  • Now here's a tragic thing.
  • 00:06:18.734 --> 00:06:21.871
  • I'm going to tell every man here.
  • 00:06:21.871 --> 00:06:25.241
  • I'm going to give you a picture of god's
  • 00:06:25.241 --> 00:06:27.276
  • Picture of your role, your place in marriage.
  • 00:06:27.276 --> 00:06:30.913
  • You know what's going to happen.
  • 00:06:31.614 --> 00:06:34.450
  • Most of you guys will understand it for a minute,
  • 00:06:34.450 --> 00:06:38.821
  • But you don't have enough stuff to take god's program.
  • 00:06:39.856 --> 00:06:45.061
  • God's picture, god's view, god's way to make your marriage
  • 00:06:45.061 --> 00:06:50.066
  • Sizzle and explode because you won't take it from here.
  • 00:06:50.066 --> 00:06:54.103
  • You'll say something like, well, i'm just like my daddy.
  • 00:06:54.103 --> 00:06:57.640
  • I've always been like this and i just can't change.
  • 00:06:57.640 --> 00:07:01.878
  • Or you'll say, well, i don't see any hope.
  • 00:07:02.778 --> 00:07:05.948
  • I just, i, i'm just going to hang in here,
  • 00:07:05.948 --> 00:07:08.784
  • And i something happens
  • 00:07:08.784 --> 00:07:11.854
  • Between god's truth
  • 00:07:11.854 --> 00:07:15.157
  • And putting that truth into practice,
  • 00:07:15.992 --> 00:07:18.895
  • Especially when it comes to marriage, guys
  • 00:07:19.762 --> 00:07:23.232
  • Especially, and particularly
  • 00:07:23.833 --> 00:07:25.201
  • When it comes to marriage.
  • 00:07:25.201 --> 00:07:27.937
  • Now, the operative word
  • 00:07:27.937 --> 00:07:30.473
  • For a man in marriage is sacrifice.
  • 00:07:30.473 --> 00:07:35.211
  • Say it with me.
  • 00:07:35.211 --> 00:07:36.078
  • Sacrifice every man.
  • 00:07:36.078 --> 00:07:37.547
  • Say it with me.
  • 00:07:37.547 --> 00:07:39.515
  • Some of you can't even say it with me.
  • 00:07:39.515 --> 00:07:41.450
  • Every man say the word sacrifice.
  • 00:07:41.450 --> 00:07:47.590
  • Now let's see what
  • 00:07:48.024 --> 00:07:49.058
  • Paul has to say.
  • 00:07:49.058 --> 00:07:54.564
  • Look at ephesians chapter number five.
  • 00:07:55.398 --> 00:07:58.467
  • I read verse 25.
  • 00:07:58.868 --> 00:08:00.736
  • I'll come back and go through the rest of the verses.
  • 00:08:00.736 --> 00:08:03.906
  • Here it says, husbands, love your wives, just as christ
  • 00:08:03.906 --> 00:08:06.809
  • Also love the church, and gave himself up for her
  • 00:08:06.809 --> 00:08:11.380
  • So that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her
  • 00:08:11.380 --> 00:08:14.450
  • By the washing of water with the word.
  • 00:08:14.450 --> 00:08:16.819
  • Now flip over to first peter.
  • 00:08:16.819 --> 00:08:18.721
  • This is peter telling husbands,
  • 00:08:18.721 --> 00:08:21.824
  • Verse seven, you husbands in the same way,
  • 00:08:21.824 --> 00:08:24.660
  • Live with your wives in an understanding way
  • 00:08:24.660 --> 00:08:28.464
  • As with someone weaker that is not mentally
  • 00:08:28.464 --> 00:08:31.467
  • Or emotionally weaker,
  • 00:08:31.467 --> 00:08:32.668
  • Someone who is physically weaker
  • 00:08:32.668 --> 00:08:34.470
  • As with someone weaker since she is a woman
  • 00:08:34.470 --> 00:08:37.473
  • And show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life,
  • 00:08:37.473 --> 00:08:42.078
  • So your prayers will not be hindered.
  • 00:08:42.078 --> 00:08:45.615
  • Go back to ephesians if you would.
  • 00:08:45.615 --> 00:08:49.685
  • Now the
  • 00:08:49.919 --> 00:08:50.953
  • Word for men is gentlemen.
  • 00:08:50.953 --> 00:08:54.323
  • One guy got it?
  • 00:08:54.690 --> 00:08:55.791
  • The word for man is
  • 00:08:55.791 --> 00:08:58.694
  • All right.
  • 00:08:58.995 --> 00:09:00.229
  • And by the way, you find that in that phrase that i read.
  • 00:09:00.229 --> 00:09:02.932
  • Look at it, husbands love your wives, just as christ
  • 00:09:02.932 --> 00:09:05.868
  • Also loved the church and gave himself up.
  • 00:09:05.868 --> 00:09:10.072
  • Sounds like sacrifice, doesn't it?
  • 00:09:10.072 --> 00:09:12.475
  • Gave himself up.
  • 00:09:12.475 --> 00:09:14.110
  • That's the word for men we know that paul talks about.
  • 00:09:14.110 --> 00:09:18.414
  • We ought to experience sacrificial love
  • 00:09:18.414 --> 00:09:20.750
  • Toward our wives.
  • 00:09:20.750 --> 00:09:21.550
  • Gentleman peter talks about
  • 00:09:21.550 --> 00:09:23.185
  • We are to experience sacrificial leadership
  • 00:09:23.185 --> 00:09:25.388
  • Toward our wives, two different things.
  • 00:09:25.388 --> 00:09:28.624
  • So first of all, he says, we are to give ourselves
  • 00:09:28.624 --> 00:09:31.894
  • Up to a sanctifying love.
  • 00:09:31.894 --> 00:09:34.997
  • What does that mean?
  • 00:09:34.997 --> 00:09:37.700
  • He says, as jesus christ sanctified
  • 00:09:37.700 --> 00:09:40.236
  • The church, how did jesus sanctify the church?
  • 00:09:40.236 --> 00:09:43.172
  • He gave his life.
  • 00:09:43.172 --> 00:09:45.374
  • He gave himself up.
  • 00:09:45.374 --> 00:09:47.610
  • He died on the cross so that we might be
  • 00:09:47.610 --> 00:09:49.979
  • In the family of god.
  • 00:09:49.979 --> 00:09:51.180
  • We might be sanctified.
  • 00:09:51.180 --> 00:09:52.982
  • We may be right with god.
  • 00:09:52.982 --> 00:09:54.583
  • We may be brothers and sisters in jesus christ.
  • 00:09:54.583 --> 00:09:57.787
  • We are set aside and we are saints.
  • 00:09:57.787 --> 00:10:00.656
  • Everybody's a christian is a saint.
  • 00:10:00.656 --> 00:10:02.958
  • And when we as christ sanctified you and me
  • 00:10:02.958 --> 00:10:06.796
  • Through the giving himself up on a cross, we,
  • 00:10:06.796 --> 00:10:09.732
  • We men are to give ourselves up to our wives and we
  • 00:10:09.732 --> 00:10:13.569
  • Set them up on a pedestal.
  • 00:10:13.569 --> 00:10:15.905
  • Guys, we are to be partners with almighty god
  • 00:10:15.905 --> 00:10:20.242
  • To bring out god's purpose
  • 00:10:20.810 --> 00:10:23.279
  • That he gave life to your wife to for the first place.
  • 00:10:23.279 --> 00:10:27.049
  • In other words, god has a purpose for every woman.
  • 00:10:27.049 --> 00:10:29.618
  • We are to help god bring out that womanhood,
  • 00:10:29.618 --> 00:10:33.489
  • That femininity in our lives.
  • 00:10:33.489 --> 00:10:35.758
  • That's our calling.
  • 00:10:35.758 --> 00:10:36.959
  • That's what we are to do. that's our role,
  • 00:10:36.959 --> 00:10:40.896
  • That's
  • 00:10:41.097 --> 00:10:41.931
  • Sanctifying and to sanctify them.
  • 00:10:41.931 --> 00:10:44.734
  • Guys, this will blow your mind.
  • 00:10:44.734 --> 00:10:46.736
  • You're going to have to talk to them.
  • 00:10:46.736 --> 00:10:49.872
  • Did you know in america, the average couple
  • 00:10:50.773 --> 00:10:53.576
  • Spends per week 37 minutes talking to one another,
  • 00:10:53.576 --> 00:10:58.681
  • 37 minutes
  • 00:10:58.981 --> 00:11:00.816
  • The average couple in a week?
  • 00:11:00.816 --> 00:11:04.353
  • Is it any wonder when the kids leave, you have an empty nest.
  • 00:11:04.353 --> 00:11:07.823
  • You look around and say, who is this man i'm married to?
  • 00:11:07.823 --> 00:11:11.360
  • I don't know him.
  • 00:11:11.360 --> 00:11:13.996
  • As we approach our fiscal
  • 00:11:13.996 --> 00:11:15.664
  • Year end on july the 31st.
  • 00:11:15.664 --> 00:11:18.501
  • We're also approaching a historic milestone.
  • 00:11:18.501 --> 00:11:21.871
  • Think about it.
  • 00:11:22.238 --> 00:11:23.139
  • America's 250th anniversary.
  • 00:11:23.139 --> 00:11:27.376
  • And as we reflect on what built this nation
  • 00:11:27.376 --> 00:11:30.713
  • Faith, family and freedom,
  • 00:11:30.713 --> 00:11:33.582
  • Fellowship, joy, meaning, significance, a family
  • 00:11:33.582 --> 00:11:37.853
  • Of god living together under the red, white and blue.
  • 00:11:37.853 --> 00:11:40.956
  • As we live under the banner of america,
  • 00:11:40.956 --> 00:11:44.260
  • We also recognize something deeply wrong.
  • 00:11:44.260 --> 00:11:48.130
  • Biblical truth is being challenged.
  • 00:11:48.130 --> 00:11:51.233
  • Families are under pressure and faith is no longer
  • 00:11:51.233 --> 00:11:54.637
  • At the center of our culture.
  • 00:11:54.637 --> 00:11:57.339
  • Now it's our turn.
  • 00:11:57.339 --> 00:11:59.341
  • Our turn to stand for what matters most.
  • 00:11:59.341 --> 00:12:02.478
  • Listen, when you request this much resource,
  • 00:12:02.478 --> 00:12:06.015
  • You're helping us proclaim the truth of god's word,
  • 00:12:06.015 --> 00:12:09.218
  • Strengthen families,
  • 00:12:09.218 --> 00:12:10.219
  • And advance faith across this great nation.
  • 00:12:10.219 --> 00:12:13.289
  • As i thank you, i would love to send you a signed
  • 00:12:13.289 --> 00:12:17.259
  • Copy of my book, healing broken america,
  • 00:12:17.259 --> 00:12:20.930
  • A book that i have written to help us understand
  • 00:12:20.930 --> 00:12:23.999
  • And to navigate our way through all the challenges
  • 00:12:23.999 --> 00:12:27.803
  • Of the 21st century in our land as we come to our fiscal
  • 00:12:27.803 --> 00:12:32.141
  • Year end.
  • 00:12:32.141 --> 00:12:33.209
  • I'm asking you to step forward in a meaningful way.
  • 00:12:33.209 --> 00:12:36.278
  • Consider a gift of $250,
  • 00:12:36.278 --> 00:12:40.216
  • Or really ten others, to give $25 a dollar
  • 00:12:40.216 --> 00:12:43.886
  • For every year of our nation's existence.
  • 00:12:43.886 --> 00:12:47.022
  • We give that to the winning walk so that it can continue
  • 00:12:47.022 --> 00:12:50.593
  • To be broadcast around the world.
  • 00:12:50.593 --> 00:12:53.863
  • Your support helps us bring biblical truth,
  • 00:12:53.863 --> 00:12:56.832
  • Encouragement, and meaning across america.
  • 00:12:56.832 --> 00:13:00.369
  • So let's stand together and believe god for renewal
  • 00:13:00.369 --> 00:13:03.405
  • And revival in our great nation.
  • 00:13:03.405 --> 00:13:07.142
  • For if america would catch far for christ,
  • 00:13:07.142 --> 00:13:09.778
  • It would touch the entire world.
  • 00:13:09.778 --> 00:13:12.314
  • Thank you.
  • 00:13:12.314 --> 00:13:13.983
  • Making this possible with your participation
  • 00:13:13.983 --> 00:13:17.019
  • In prayer and gifts to the winning walk.
  • 00:13:17.019 --> 00:13:29.098
  • So we
  • 00:13:29.331 --> 00:13:30.766
  • Sanctify, we, we, we build up, we put them up.
  • 00:13:30.766 --> 00:13:35.337
  • There must be a giving up, sanctifying love also.
  • 00:13:35.337 --> 00:13:38.974
  • There must be a giving up beautifying love.
  • 00:13:38.974 --> 00:13:41.944
  • Look at this,
  • 00:13:41.944 --> 00:13:43.145
  • That he might present to himself the church
  • 00:13:43.145 --> 00:13:46.015
  • In all her glory, having no spot or regal
  • 00:13:46.015 --> 00:13:49.818
  • Or any such thing, that she would be holy and blameless.
  • 00:13:49.818 --> 00:13:53.622
  • In other words,
  • 00:13:53.622 --> 00:13:54.590
  • As christ is to present all of us as his body,
  • 00:13:54.590 --> 00:13:58.327
  • He is the bridegroom, where the bride
  • 00:13:59.128 --> 00:14:01.630
  • He wants to present us to god without spot, without wrinkle,
  • 00:14:01.630 --> 00:14:05.935
  • And the shed blood has covered our sin.
  • 00:14:05.935 --> 00:14:08.504
  • God sees you and me is perfect.
  • 00:14:08.504 --> 00:14:10.572
  • So we are to present our wives and make them beautiful.
  • 00:14:10.572 --> 00:14:14.810
  • How do you make your wife beautiful?
  • 00:14:14.810 --> 00:14:17.646
  • By encouraging
  • 00:14:17.646 --> 00:14:20.783
  • Bye bye bye, building them up.
  • 00:14:20.783 --> 00:14:24.286
  • That's how we make them.
  • 00:14:24.820 --> 00:14:26.055
  • Listen, i can talk to any wife here.
  • 00:14:26.055 --> 00:14:29.091
  • Truthfully, about 15 to 30 minutes.
  • 00:14:29.091 --> 00:14:32.127
  • And i can tell you
  • 00:14:32.127 --> 00:14:33.629
  • In a skinny minute with unerring authority,
  • 00:14:33.629 --> 00:14:37.566
  • Whether or not that white that husband really builds
  • 00:14:37.566 --> 00:14:40.903
  • Up and honors and adores that woman,
  • 00:14:40.903 --> 00:14:44.640
  • She'll have a beauty in her that you can't miss.
  • 00:14:44.640 --> 00:14:48.711
  • By the same token,
  • 00:14:49.144 --> 00:14:50.379
  • If the husband has been a dullard and doesn't get it
  • 00:14:50.379 --> 00:14:54.616
  • And just going to the motion of husband,
  • 00:14:54.616 --> 00:14:57.486
  • I can tell that to doesn't want to be very smart.
  • 00:14:57.486 --> 00:15:01.657
  • You can tell a woman who's loved by her husband
  • 00:15:01.657 --> 00:15:05.060
  • The way christ loved the church.
  • 00:15:05.761 --> 00:15:07.429
  • It shows in her steps,
  • 00:15:07.429 --> 00:15:09.365
  • In her words and her attitude and a whole giving us.
  • 00:15:09.365 --> 00:15:12.935
  • It just overflows
  • 00:15:12.935 --> 00:15:14.703
  • Because she's secure and confident of his love
  • 00:15:14.703 --> 00:15:18.374
  • And his faithfulness and his fidelity to her.
  • 00:15:18.374 --> 00:15:21.410
  • Look at other kind of love that paul tells us how husbands
  • 00:15:21.410 --> 00:15:24.146
  • Ought to perform, how we ought to act.
  • 00:15:24.146 --> 00:15:27.082
  • It says here in verse
  • 00:15:27.082 --> 00:15:30.352
  • 28, for no one ever hated his own flesh,
  • 00:15:31.220 --> 00:15:34.656
  • But nourishes and cherishes it, just as christ also does
  • 00:15:34.656 --> 00:15:38.327
  • A church.
  • 00:15:38.327 --> 00:15:39.228
  • There is to be a cherishing love.
  • 00:15:39.228 --> 00:15:44.133
  • We're to give ourselves up so we can have
  • 00:15:44.133 --> 00:15:46.935
  • A cherishing love toward our wife.
  • 00:15:46.935 --> 00:15:49.738
  • What are the world does that mean?
  • 00:15:50.472 --> 00:15:52.608
  • It means she knows that she's a first importance to us.
  • 00:15:52.608 --> 00:15:56.945
  • If i handed out a piece of paper and i asked you guys
  • 00:15:56.945 --> 00:16:00.616
  • To write down the three things your wife most likes to do.
  • 00:16:00.616 --> 00:16:08.157
  • My point
  • 00:16:08.424 --> 00:16:09.191
  • Is, do you really know your wife?
  • 00:16:09.191 --> 00:16:11.860
  • What makes her laugh?
  • 00:16:12.361 --> 00:16:13.328
  • What makes her cry?
  • 00:16:13.328 --> 00:16:15.264
  • What makes her?
  • 00:16:15.264 --> 00:16:16.031
  • How do you know her love language.
  • 00:16:16.031 --> 00:16:19.334
  • Everybody has a love language.
  • 00:16:19.334 --> 00:16:21.303
  • And then the next way we love.
  • 00:16:21.303 --> 00:16:24.640
  • And this is in our scripture,
  • 00:16:24.640 --> 00:16:27.776
  • You give yourself up
  • 00:16:27.776 --> 00:16:30.612
  • So you can participate
  • 00:16:30.612 --> 00:16:33.048
  • In divine math.
  • 00:16:33.048 --> 00:16:36.485
  • There's divine math that paul gives us here.
  • 00:16:36.485 --> 00:16:39.121
  • We know what it is. we've been over it before.
  • 00:16:39.121 --> 00:16:41.123
  • Listen to it because we are members of his body.
  • 00:16:41.123 --> 00:16:44.927
  • For this reason, a man shall leave his father
  • 00:16:44.927 --> 00:16:47.362
  • And mother and shall be joined to his wife,
  • 00:16:47.362 --> 00:16:50.432
  • And the two shall become one flesh.
  • 00:16:50.432 --> 00:16:53.702
  • We give ourselves up, guys, to our wives
  • 00:16:53.702 --> 00:16:56.472
  • So that my divine math can take place.
  • 00:16:56.472 --> 00:16:59.708
  • What's divine math?
  • 00:16:59.708 --> 00:17:01.009
  • One plus one equals one.
  • 00:17:01.009 --> 00:17:04.813
  • Say it with me.
  • 00:17:04.813 --> 00:17:05.881
  • One plus one equals one.
  • 00:17:05.881 --> 00:17:10.152
  • How does this take place?
  • 00:17:10.152 --> 00:17:12.988
  • How does it work?
  • 00:17:12.988 --> 00:17:15.057
  • It's an amazing thing, how it works.
  • 00:17:15.057 --> 00:17:17.926
  • You have two different individuals and it's not his
  • 00:17:17.926 --> 00:17:21.864
  • And hers.
  • 00:17:21.864 --> 00:17:23.432
  • It's ours.
  • 00:17:23.432 --> 00:17:25.367
  • It's not he and she.
  • 00:17:25.367 --> 00:17:27.769
  • It's we
  • 00:17:27.769 --> 00:17:30.372
  • To become one.
  • 00:17:30.706 --> 00:17:33.308
  • It is a irrevocable commitment
  • 00:17:33.308 --> 00:17:36.378
  • To an imperfect person for life.
  • 00:17:36.378 --> 00:17:40.048
  • That's a definition of marriage,
  • 00:17:40.782 --> 00:17:43.952
  • God's way, god's way, and in that deal to become one.
  • 00:17:43.952 --> 00:17:49.424
  • And that's so difficult. how does that happen?
  • 00:17:49.424 --> 00:17:51.860
  • The bible tells us in genesis, paul tells us it's found.
  • 00:17:51.860 --> 00:17:55.664
  • Jesus tells us in matthew 19, you leave.
  • 00:17:55.664 --> 00:17:59.468
  • You gotta leave all those other relationship first place.
  • 00:17:59.468 --> 00:18:02.604
  • If anything come to your life, it's your wife,
  • 00:18:02.604 --> 00:18:04.773
  • First place it's your wife, first place.
  • 00:18:04.773 --> 00:18:06.742
  • You've got to leave everything else
  • 00:18:06.742 --> 00:18:08.710
  • Your wife, your wife, your wife, gentleman.
  • 00:18:08.710 --> 00:18:11.280
  • You have to leave all other relationships.
  • 00:18:11.280 --> 00:18:13.282
  • She is first in primary.
  • 00:18:13.282 --> 00:18:15.017
  • And you, unless you leave, they can't heaven it together.
  • 00:18:15.017 --> 00:18:18.287
  • See the action words.
  • 00:18:18.287 --> 00:18:19.788
  • There are the verbs.
  • 00:18:19.788 --> 00:18:20.656
  • You leave,
  • 00:18:20.656 --> 00:18:21.790
  • You're joined and you become, leave, join, become.
  • 00:18:21.790 --> 00:18:25.527
  • Join in. king james would be cleave.
  • 00:18:25.527 --> 00:18:27.696
  • You can't unless you leave.
  • 00:18:27.696 --> 00:18:29.698
  • You can't cleave.
  • 00:18:29.698 --> 00:18:31.233
  • But when you leave, then you can cleave.
  • 00:18:32.067 --> 00:18:34.570
  • And then you become one flesh.
  • 00:18:34.570 --> 00:18:37.506
  • And that is a divine thing.
  • 00:18:37.506 --> 00:18:39.608
  • That is a mystery.
  • 00:18:39.608 --> 00:18:41.310
  • That is a supernatural thing.
  • 00:18:41.310 --> 00:18:43.178
  • Just like if you're in christ, as christ as in you,
  • 00:18:43.178 --> 00:18:46.181
  • Do you understand that i'm in christ, christ in me?
  • 00:18:46.181 --> 00:18:49.685
  • Do i understand that? no, it's a mystery.
  • 00:18:49.685 --> 00:18:51.820
  • That's so it is with marriage.
  • 00:18:51.820 --> 00:18:53.222
  • It is a mystery.
  • 00:18:53.222 --> 00:18:54.823
  • Christ in you, christ in me, your wife and you.
  • 00:18:54.823 --> 00:18:58.126
  • You and your wife. your wife.
  • 00:18:58.126 --> 00:18:59.494
  • You become one flesh.
  • 00:18:59.494 --> 00:19:01.163
  • How does this work?
  • 00:19:01.163 --> 00:19:03.765
  • You become one in body.
  • 00:19:03.765 --> 00:19:06.568
  • That's eros.
  • 00:19:06.568 --> 00:19:07.603
  • That's the physical part of marriage.
  • 00:19:07.603 --> 00:19:09.504
  • We'll talk about that in weeks to come.
  • 00:19:09.504 --> 00:19:11.440
  • You become one in body, a symbol of the covenant
  • 00:19:11.440 --> 00:19:15.110
  • With the church, a symbol in the marriage.
  • 00:19:15.110 --> 00:19:17.579
  • You become one flesh.
  • 00:19:17.579 --> 00:19:18.547
  • That's the greek word eros.
  • 00:19:18.547 --> 00:19:20.849
  • And then you become body and soul.
  • 00:19:20.849 --> 00:19:23.885
  • Soul is the will.
  • 00:19:23.885 --> 00:19:25.187
  • It's where we make decisions and you become one in soul.
  • 00:19:25.187 --> 00:19:30.092
  • That is friendship, that is filial, that is friendship.
  • 00:19:30.092 --> 00:19:33.695
  • Love. the greek word for leo.
  • 00:19:33.695 --> 00:19:35.063
  • We're friends.
  • 00:19:35.063 --> 00:19:36.064
  • Your best friend is your wife.
  • 00:19:36.064 --> 00:19:38.400
  • Your best friend is your wife.
  • 00:19:39.001 --> 00:19:41.069
  • Then we become one in spirit.
  • 00:19:41.069 --> 00:19:43.338
  • And that's agape love.
  • 00:19:43.338 --> 00:19:45.240
  • That is unconditional love that god has for you and me.
  • 00:19:45.240 --> 00:19:49.011
  • He doesn't love you any better
  • 00:19:49.011 --> 00:19:50.545
  • When you're worse or bad or good.
  • 00:19:50.545 --> 00:19:51.980
  • It's unconditional love
  • 00:19:51.980 --> 00:19:53.181
  • That is that unconditional love that is a spiritual thing.
  • 00:19:53.181 --> 00:19:56.818
  • Now we see what paul has said about marriage.
  • 00:19:56.818 --> 00:19:59.921
  • We're to demonstrate sacrificial love.
  • 00:19:59.921 --> 00:20:02.124
  • Peter comes in in a very brief time.
  • 00:20:02.124 --> 00:20:04.326
  • He just nails down our role as leaders in marriage.
  • 00:20:04.326 --> 00:20:07.663
  • Look at it in first peter chapter three.
  • 00:20:07.663 --> 00:20:11.133
  • You husbands, in the same way,
  • 00:20:11.733 --> 00:20:14.336
  • Live with your wives in an understanding way.
  • 00:20:14.336 --> 00:20:18.340
  • In other words, we are to lead with understanding.
  • 00:20:18.340 --> 00:20:22.244
  • We are to be leaders in the home,
  • 00:20:22.244 --> 00:20:23.712
  • But we have to be understanding leaders.
  • 00:20:23.712 --> 00:20:26.548
  • Years ago, we had a seminar in our church by doctor
  • 00:20:26.548 --> 00:20:29.251
  • Smalley and he used the figure.
  • 00:20:29.251 --> 00:20:32.020
  • He said that men are buffaloes and women are butterflies.
  • 00:20:32.020 --> 00:20:36.258
  • I like that, guys.
  • 00:20:36.692 --> 00:20:38.627
  • We're a buffalo. we just.
  • 00:20:38.627 --> 00:20:41.496
  • Man, we just brutes.
  • 00:20:41.963 --> 00:20:45.100
  • Women are butterflies.
  • 00:20:45.100 --> 00:20:48.236
  • Oh, they just fly around.
  • 00:20:48.236 --> 00:20:49.805
  • I mean, they're multicolored.
  • 00:20:49.805 --> 00:20:51.406
  • We're just.
  • 00:20:51.406 --> 00:20:53.108
  • We just are lugs.
  • 00:20:53.108 --> 00:20:55.844
  • Boy, it's hard for a butterfly to communicate
  • 00:20:56.712 --> 00:20:59.047
  • With a buffalo and a buffalo to mediate with a butterfly.
  • 00:20:59.047 --> 00:21:02.250
  • That's the challenge we have.
  • 00:21:02.250 --> 00:21:04.186
  • So, guys, we are charged by god to understand our wives,
  • 00:21:04.186 --> 00:21:09.891
  • To see what makes them tick, to to
  • 00:21:09.891 --> 00:21:12.861
  • To work through these things, to listen enough to love enough
  • 00:21:12.861 --> 00:21:16.498
  • To care enough
  • 00:21:16.498 --> 00:21:17.699
  • To give ourselves up enough to lead in an understanding
  • 00:21:17.699 --> 00:21:21.336
  • Way, very important, very important.
  • 00:21:21.336 --> 00:21:26.007
  • And look at the next way that we are to leave.
  • 00:21:26.007 --> 00:21:28.777
  • Peter still talking to us now,
  • 00:21:28.777 --> 00:21:30.912
  • He said, as with someone weaker since she is a woman,
  • 00:21:30.912 --> 00:21:35.083
  • And show her honor as a fellow heir
  • 00:21:35.083 --> 00:21:38.120
  • Of the grace of god, we are to lead in honoring.
  • 00:21:38.120 --> 00:21:41.723
  • There should be an honoring leadership.
  • 00:21:41.723 --> 00:21:44.860
  • Do you honor your wife?
  • 00:21:44.860 --> 00:21:46.161
  • Do you do you really?
  • 00:21:46.161 --> 00:21:47.529
  • Are you thrilled with her?
  • 00:21:47.529 --> 00:21:49.431
  • When you see your wife, does your heart beat faster
  • 00:21:49.431 --> 00:21:52.100
  • When you see your wife or you you want to be with her?
  • 00:21:52.100 --> 00:21:54.736
  • You want to be a with her. you honor.
  • 00:21:54.736 --> 00:21:57.139
  • She knows that of all the people in the world,
  • 00:21:57.139 --> 00:21:59.741
  • You place her up higher than anybody else.
  • 00:21:59.741 --> 00:22:02.944
  • You applaud her more than anybody else.
  • 00:22:02.944 --> 00:22:05.580
  • You're on her team no matter what happens.
  • 00:22:05.580 --> 00:22:08.283
  • So let me tell you something.
  • 00:22:08.283 --> 00:22:09.651
  • In marriage, it's not win lose.
  • 00:22:09.651 --> 00:22:12.421
  • It's win win.
  • 00:22:12.421 --> 00:22:13.789
  • If the wife wins, the husband wins it.
  • 00:22:13.789 --> 00:22:17.459
  • If the husband loses, the wife loses it. just lose.
  • 00:22:17.459 --> 00:22:20.061
  • Lose a win win. it's never a win.
  • 00:22:20.061 --> 00:22:22.164
  • Lose with a marriage because you're one.
  • 00:22:22.164 --> 00:22:24.599
  • See it?
  • 00:22:24.599 --> 00:22:25.734
  • You're in the same team.
  • 00:22:25.734 --> 00:22:27.269
  • So we love with an honoring love.
  • 00:22:27.269 --> 00:22:29.805
  • And then look at the next thing.
  • 00:22:29.805 --> 00:22:31.907
  • This is this is interesting.
  • 00:22:31.907 --> 00:22:33.308
  • It it sort of surprises you.
  • 00:22:33.308 --> 00:22:35.577
  • It says so that your prayers will not be hindered.
  • 00:22:35.577 --> 00:22:39.047
  • Peter says we are to love with a praying leadership.
  • 00:22:39.047 --> 00:22:46.021
  • Guys,
  • 00:22:46.254 --> 00:22:49.024
  • You want your marriage to come alive.
  • 00:22:49.024 --> 00:22:51.426
  • Just pray with your wife.
  • 00:22:51.426 --> 00:22:53.128
  • Well, i'm not much on prayer.
  • 00:22:53.128 --> 00:22:56.131
  • Let me tell you something.
  • 00:22:56.131 --> 00:22:58.333
  • My dad didn't become a christian till he's in his 40s.
  • 00:22:58.333 --> 00:23:02.003
  • My mother led us in reading the bible and praying night
  • 00:23:02.003 --> 00:23:05.040
  • After night.
  • 00:23:05.040 --> 00:23:06.208
  • My brother and myself dad never participated.
  • 00:23:06.208 --> 00:23:10.111
  • But after he became a christian,
  • 00:23:10.111 --> 00:23:11.746
  • I remember the first night.
  • 00:23:11.746 --> 00:23:13.248
  • I remember it like yesterday. i could.
  • 00:23:13.248 --> 00:23:15.283
  • I could recreate the little
  • 00:23:15.283 --> 00:23:16.952
  • Bedroom and in the bed where we were seated,
  • 00:23:16.952 --> 00:23:19.488
  • And my dad came in
  • 00:23:19.488 --> 00:23:20.789
  • For the first time and heard the scripture read.
  • 00:23:20.789 --> 00:23:23.091
  • And i prayed and mother prayed.
  • 00:23:23.091 --> 00:23:24.626
  • My brother prayed, and then my dad prayed.
  • 00:23:24.626 --> 00:23:29.064
  • It wasn't a vow.
  • 00:23:29.464 --> 00:23:31.600
  • And thee and in jesus name,
  • 00:23:31.600 --> 00:23:35.337
  • And didn't hide all those religious words.
  • 00:23:35.337 --> 00:23:38.740
  • He didn't know those religious words.
  • 00:23:38.740 --> 00:23:41.543
  • But i'll never forget that prayer.
  • 00:23:41.543 --> 00:23:44.579
  • It changed
  • 00:23:44.880 --> 00:23:45.680
  • Everything in our little family,
  • 00:23:45.680 --> 00:23:48.350
  • Guys.
  • 00:23:48.583 --> 00:23:51.586
  • A lot of you argue about athletics.
  • 00:23:51.586 --> 00:23:54.422
  • You'd argue about politics, you'd argue about business.
  • 00:23:54.422 --> 00:23:58.126
  • But i asked you simply to say a simple prayer.
  • 00:23:59.027 --> 00:24:02.364
  • And you think, i'm asking you what your maiden name is,
  • 00:24:02.364 --> 00:24:05.267
  • Guys.
  • 00:24:05.267 --> 00:24:08.169
  • Just learn how to simply
  • 00:24:08.169 --> 00:24:10.972
  • Pray with your wife.
  • 00:24:10.972 --> 00:24:13.341
  • It'll change everything.
  • 00:24:13.341 --> 00:24:16.778
  • Now, you can't say from this day forward,
  • 00:24:17.612 --> 00:24:21.683
  • I just don't know how to conduct myself as a husband.
  • 00:24:21.683 --> 00:24:25.320
  • I don't get all this.
  • 00:24:25.320 --> 00:24:27.289
  • That excuse is lame.
  • 00:24:27.289 --> 00:24:30.292
  • It is invalid
  • 00:24:30.659 --> 00:24:33.061
  • Because at least you were present today, guys,
  • 00:24:33.061 --> 00:24:37.465
  • And you got it as clear and as straight as i know how
  • 00:24:37.465 --> 00:24:41.469
  • To deliver it, led by the holy spirit of god almighty.
  • 00:24:41.469 --> 00:24:44.940
  • Now, what are you going to do with it?
  • 00:24:44.940 --> 00:24:51.212
  • It's not going to be
  • 00:24:51.680 --> 00:24:53.214
  • Shazam in the morning.
  • 00:24:53.214 --> 00:24:56.685
  • But as we begin to put this picture together
  • 00:24:57.586 --> 00:25:01.623
  • Of god's role and plan for a guy in marriage,
  • 00:25:01.623 --> 00:25:06.227
  • Wonderful things begin to happen.
  • 00:25:06.227 --> 00:25:09.297
  • And one day you'll wake up and you'll say,
  • 00:25:09.297 --> 00:25:12.000
  • Who is that woman i'm married to?
  • 00:25:12.000 --> 00:25:15.103
  • I don't recognize her, man.
  • 00:25:15.103 --> 00:25:18.006
  • She's more beautiful and charming and sweeter
  • 00:25:18.006 --> 00:25:21.710
  • And more loving and sympathetic.
  • 00:25:21.710 --> 00:25:23.912
  • I can't imagine how she has so radically changed.
  • 00:25:23.912 --> 00:25:28.850
  • Gentleman, she has not changed
  • 00:25:28.850 --> 00:25:32.454
  • You simply, i
  • 00:25:32.821 --> 00:25:34.823
  • We have begun to understand the mission and the calling
  • 00:25:34.823 --> 00:25:40.895
  • And the privilege of loving
  • 00:25:40.895 --> 00:25:44.332
  • And leading
  • 00:25:44.666 --> 00:25:47.602
  • As men of god,
  • 00:25:47.602 --> 00:25:49.604
  • As husbands in a marriage.
  • 00:25:49.604 --> 00:25:52.207
  • And all of a sudden we'll wake up and say.
  • 00:25:52.207 --> 00:25:57.178
  • It's a miracle.
  • 00:25:57.545 --> 00:26:01.416
  • America the beautiful, our country
  • 00:26:02.150 --> 00:26:05.387
  • After home sweet home.
  • 00:26:05.387 --> 00:26:07.422
  • But our america is hurting.
  • 00:26:07.422 --> 00:26:10.025
  • We see it in our fractured, divided communities
  • 00:26:10.025 --> 00:26:12.961
  • And in our struggling families.
  • 00:26:12.961 --> 00:26:15.664
  • God's answer for a broken nation has never been found
  • 00:26:15.664 --> 00:26:18.900
  • In politics, power, or human effort alone.
  • 00:26:18.900 --> 00:26:22.671
  • God says, if my people who are called by
  • 00:26:22.671 --> 00:26:25.740
  • My name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and
  • 00:26:25.740 --> 00:26:30.412
  • Turn from their wicked ways, then i will hear from heaven,
  • 00:26:30.412 --> 00:26:33.982
  • Forgive their sin, and heal their land.
  • 00:26:33.982 --> 00:26:37.819
  • Healing begins when god's people return to him.
  • 00:26:37.819 --> 00:26:41.322
  • In his powerful book, healing broken america.
  • 00:26:41.322 --> 00:26:44.826
  • Doctor jung explores the spiritual path toward
  • 00:26:44.826 --> 00:26:47.729
  • Healing and restoration through faith, family,
  • 00:26:47.729 --> 00:26:51.199
  • And the values that have shaped generations of americans.
  • 00:26:51.199 --> 00:26:54.869
  • Because when
  • 00:26:54.869 --> 00:26:55.904
  • Hearts are transformed by god, lives are changed,
  • 00:26:55.904 --> 00:26:59.541
  • Families are restored, and the nation can begin to heal.
  • 00:26:59.541 --> 00:27:03.478
  • To get your copy of healing broken america.
  • 00:27:03.478 --> 00:27:06.915
  • Please call the number on your screen or visit
  • 00:27:06.915 --> 00:27:09.718
  • The website below.
  • 00:27:09.718 --> 00:27:10.919
  • And may god bless america.
  • 00:27:10.919 --> 00:27:10.919