Andy Stanley - Paper Walls (Part 4)

September 27, 2025 | 30:10

Your Move with Andy Stanley — to help people make better decisions and live with fewer regrets.

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Your Move with Andy Stanley | Andy Stanley - Paper Walls (Part 4) | September 27, 2025
  • ...
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  • Andy stanley: hey everybody, welcome to "your move" where we
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  • Help you make better decisions and live with fewer regrets.
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  • I'm andy stanley and i'll be your guide.
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  • So there are two kinds of people in the world.
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  • People who make excuses and people who make a difference.
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  • Which one are you and which one do you wanna be?
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  • That's what i thought.
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  • Stick around and we'll talk about it right here on
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  • "your move."
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  • ♪♪♪
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  • ♪♪♪
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  • ♪♪♪
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  • Andy: chances are at some point along the way you have
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  • Heard it said that there are two kinds of people in
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  • The world, right?
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  • In fact, you've heard this so many times, that's the only part
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  • Of it that you remember, right?
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  • You can't even remember what comes after this.
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  • This is what originally attributed to mark twain.
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  • I assume he's the first person who popularized.
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  • There are two kinds of people in the world and whatever follows
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  • This is generally some sort of oversimplification.
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  • But that's okay because simple things are sticky things and
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  • Sometimes it's better to oversimplify something to
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  • Remember it than to make it complicated and, you know, tease
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  • It all out, but you can't remember anything that was said.
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  • So there are two kinds of people in the world.
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  • People who make a difference and people who make what?
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  • Excuses.
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  • Yeah, there are people who make a difference.
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  • There are people who make excuses.
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  • And so the question is which kind of person do you wanna be?
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  • The kind of person that makes the world better, the kind of
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  • Person that makes the people around them better?
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  • Or do you want to be somebody who lives behind what we've
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  • Called paper walls.
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  • Behind the excuses that we disguise as reasons, but at the
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  • End of the day, they're just excuses.
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  • Today we're wrapping up our series if you haven't been with
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  • Us, "paper walls: moving beyond the excuses that hold you back."
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  • We've said throughout the series there are things that are worth
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  • Carrying season to season, year to year, good friends, good
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  • Habits, and there are things that need to be left behind once
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  • And for all, and namely we're talking about excuses.
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  • That whatever our excuses are, they need to be abandoned once
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  • And for all.
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  • We said throughout the series that excuses are a lot like
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  • Paper walls that from a distance it looks real, it looks like an
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  • Actual obstacle, it looks like there's no way through and we
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  • Present it that way to ourselves and we present it that way to
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  • Other people.
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  • And then before we know it, our excuses, our excuses become our
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  • Becauses, our becauses.
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  • Becauses that we retreat to when certain topics come up, certain
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  • People come up, certain challenges come up.
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  • Becauses that we hide behind and defend ourselves with.
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  • Well, why don't you? well, because.
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  • Well, why haven't you? because.
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  • Why do you always? because.
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  • Why do you act that way? because.
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  • Why don't you just give that up? because.
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  • Why don't you just talk to her?
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  • Why don't you just talk to him? because.
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  • Why don't you just forgive them? because.
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  • Why don't you call your dad? because.
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  • Why don't you call your mom? because.
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  • Why don't you reach out?
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  • Why why? because, because, because.
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  • And often, as we said, because isn't really the cause.
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  • Our because is an excuse masquerading as a cause.
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  • So in this series throughout we've asked this question and
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  • I've tried to be gentle.
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  • So i've, you know, i've posed the question in somewhat of
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  • A gentle way.
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  • Is it possible? is it possible?
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  • Would you be open to considering?
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  • Is it possible that you're missing out because you have
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  • Walled yourself in?
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  • Is it possible, is it possible that there is something on the
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  • Other side of your excuses that is good?
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  • Is there something on the other side of your excuses that you
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  • Would benefit from?
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  • Is there something on the other side of your excuses that would
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  • Allow you to make the people around you better and make the
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  • World better?
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  • Now the truth is, and we could spend a lot of time on
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  • This, but we won't.
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  • Most of our paper walls or most of our excuses are fear based.
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  • In my case, i almost didn't go to my graduate, the graduate
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  • School that i really wanted to go to because i was afraid.
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  • I was just afraid.
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  • And of course, when people would ask and i would talk about it
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  • With my family, i didn't say i'm afraid, i had other reasons.
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  • I had several, but, you know, paper walls as to why i wasn't
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  • Going to attend that particular graduate school, but i would
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  • Never say it was because i was afraid because, you know, fear
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  • Wasn't a reason you get fear of failure, isn't it true?
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  • Fear of failure is very difficult to admit.
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  • And the most difficult person it is to admit to is to ourselves.
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  • But i was actually afraid of the academic rigor of that
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  • Particular school.
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  • I knew i could get in, but i may never get out.
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  • It would be my "hotel california."
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  • I would be there forever trying to make my way out because it
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  • Was just gonna be too difficult.
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  • So i just threw it out of my mind.
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  • I'm not even gonna go there.
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  • I didn't even fill out the app--i filled out half the
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  • Application, then just quit and decided to go to another school.
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  • And i was at home.
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  • I was living in my parents' basement.
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  • I had just finished georgia state university, getting ready
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  • For grad school.
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  • And my dad was out of town and he called me.
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  • He literally called me on the phone.
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  • I was gonna say he called me on it.
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  • He did call me on it.
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  • He called me on the phone.
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  • And he knew, he knew that the reasons i had been giving him
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  • And he had heard me give other people, they weren't
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  • Really reasons.
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  • They were excuses.
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  • And he decided, you know what?
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  • I'm gonna interfere and he called me and he challenged me.
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  • And he didn't accuse me of being afraid, but you know what
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  • He did?
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  • He was so wise.
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  • He led me right up to the paper wall and then he just left
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  • Me there.
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  • And he ended the phone call and no lie, i was so angry.
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  • I was so angry at him because i already had a roommate, i'd
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  • Already sent in my deposit for the other school.
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  • I had already had a dorm.
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  • I had everything worked out and now he's interfering with my
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  • Plan because he knew i was making an excuse.
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  • I was afraid, a failure.
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  • And i changed my mind at the last minute and i went to the
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  • School of my choice and i'm so extraordinarily, extraordinarily
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  • Grateful that i did.
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  • Now our fear comes from several things.
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  • You know, oftentimes our fear that sort of is the seed bed for
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  • Our excuses, it comes from our past experience.
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  • There's something we experienced in the past and we don't ever
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  • Wanna experience that again.
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  • It may not be the exact same circumstances, but it creates
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  • That same sense of fear.
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  • Fear of abandonment or fear of failure or fear of just being
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  • Embarrassed or ashamed.
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  • But most of the time, i think we don't even know where it
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  • Comes from.
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  • We don't know, but there's something that just triggers, it
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  • Just automatically triggers our because narrative and we just go
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  • There over and over and over.
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  • So off we go and then we don't grow and we're stuck.
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  • Because you should know this, excuses are like kryptonite to
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  • Your soul.
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  • They slowly kill you on the inside, they kill us on the
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  • Inside because we're not able to do the thing that we were
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  • Created to do.
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  • We're not able to be the person that we were created as we're
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  • Gonna see in just a few minutes to be.
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  • Andy: hey, i wanted to take just a minute to address a growing
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  • Crisis in america.
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  • Did you know that nearly 75 million americans have no
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  • Religious affiliation, none whatsoever?
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  • Most of us know some of these people.
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  • Many of us are related to some of these people.
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  • So for us, they aren't statistics, they're people we
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  • Love and would love to see return to faith in jesus.
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  • So at "your move," we are committed to reaching people
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  • With the teaching of jesus right where they are and when they
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  • Least expect it.
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  • We use a research back digital strategy that's already making
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  • A difference.
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  • So if you'll stick around after today's message, we would love
  • 00:07:35.239 --> 00:07:37.174
  • To tell you more about it or visit the website or call the
  • 00:07:37.174 --> 00:07:40.478
  • Number on your screen to learn how you can be a part of this
  • 00:07:40.478 --> 00:07:43.381
  • Revolutionary approach to introducing and reintroducing
  • 00:07:43.381 --> 00:07:46.817
  • People to jesus.
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  • Andy: excuses, and we don't do this on purpose, excuses make us
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  • Small and excuses ultimately make us selfish and
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  • Relationally, they make us unavailable because excuses are
  • 00:07:57.461 --> 00:08:02.366
  • Fueled by a lie or lies that we tell ourselves and then we don't
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  • Think about it as lying, we end up lying to other people.
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  • Andy, why aren't you gonna go to that school?
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  • Here's why i'm not gonna go to that school.
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  • And everything i said after that was a lie that i had
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  • Internalized and then i told other people.
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  • You'll miss out.
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  • You miss out.
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  • And then because of your excuse, the world misses out on you and
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  • It's all because you've allowed or i've allowed an excuse to
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  • Become the boss of me, a tyrant, a king.
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  • A king that says, you can't try that, you'll fail.
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  • You can't do that, you know what happened last time.
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  • You shouldn't try that, somebody else has already done that.
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  • Somebody else has already tried that.
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  • Somebody else already wrote that.
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  • Somebody else already started something like that.
  • 00:08:47.511 --> 00:08:49.313
  • Somebody else already did that or somebody else already failed
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  • At that.
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  • So you miss out, the world misses out on you, but here's
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  • The worst thing, and here's what we're gonna talk about for just
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  • A few minutes.
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  • You run the risk, and i know you don't wanna do this, you run the
  • 00:09:00.191 --> 00:09:03.694
  • Risk of missing out on god's plan for you.
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  • Now, i need you to just work with me for just a minute, and
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  • Especially if you're not a christian or you're not even
  • 00:09:10.368 --> 00:09:13.337
  • Sure there is a god, just use your imagination with me for
  • 00:09:13.337 --> 00:09:16.574
  • Just a minute, okay?
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  • If there is a personal god, and by personal god i mean a
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  • Personal god who knows you, who knows maybe your name, who is
  • 00:09:23.114 --> 00:09:27.718
  • Aware of you.
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  • So if there is a personal god who knows you.
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  • And if god has invited you to interact with and speak to him
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  • And respond to him as if he is a perfect father, a perfect
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  • Heavenly father, and jesus said that is how we're to approach
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  • God as a perfect heavenly father.
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  • If that's the case, then think about it, the god of the
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  • Universe may have a plan for your life.
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  • And i don't mean on monday at 3 o'clock kind of plan.
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  • I mean, the god of the universe may in fact have something
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  • You're supposed to do with your life.
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  • There may be something that is unique to you that god wants you
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  • To do.
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  • And if you're not careful, and if i'm not careful, we can miss
  • 00:10:08.225 --> 00:10:11.996
  • It because we live behind excuses and paper walls.
  • 00:10:11.996 --> 00:10:17.301
  • Now, this isn't original with me.
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  • The apostle paul, who, as most of you know, steps onto the
  • 00:10:19.303 --> 00:10:22.673
  • Pages of history as saul of tarsus who hates christians.
  • 00:10:22.673 --> 00:10:25.676
  • You may hate christians in your mind.
  • 00:10:25.676 --> 00:10:27.044
  • He had had christians arrested and tortured, anyway.
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  • And then he becomes one fascinating story, and then he
  • 00:10:29.714 --> 00:10:33.084
  • Becomes the most famous one ever.
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  • And in a letter that he wrote to christians living in ephesus in
  • 00:10:35.486 --> 00:10:38.656
  • The first century, listen to what he says to them and what he
  • 00:10:38.656 --> 00:10:41.625
  • Says to you and what he says to me.
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  • He writes, "for we," this is so powerful.
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  • You may have, you've probably read this before or heard it
  • 00:10:45.196 --> 00:10:47.064
  • Before, "for we are god's creation."
  • 00:10:47.064 --> 00:10:50.868
  • Now think about this, anything that's created is created with
  • 00:10:50.868 --> 00:10:55.272
  • A purpose in mind.
  • 00:10:55.272 --> 00:10:56.774
  • Anything that's created is created with a purpose in mind.
  • 00:10:56.774 --> 00:10:59.243
  • Anything that's created is created as a means to an end
  • 00:10:59.243 --> 00:11:03.714
  • That's not the thing.
  • 00:11:03.714 --> 00:11:05.683
  • But then the apostle paul drops back and he addresses a subset
  • 00:11:05.683 --> 00:11:09.286
  • Of god's creation.
  • 00:11:09.286 --> 00:11:10.621
  • He says, we are all god's creation.
  • 00:11:10.621 --> 00:11:13.157
  • Some of us, because of a choice we've made, created in christ
  • 00:11:13.157 --> 00:11:16.727
  • Jesus or recreated in christ jesus, and this is the apostle
  • 00:11:16.727 --> 00:11:20.264
  • Paul's code terminology for new covenant.
  • 00:11:20.264 --> 00:11:23.400
  • Whenever the apostle paul writes in christ, he's talking about
  • 00:11:23.400 --> 00:11:26.237
  • People who have embraced jesus's new covenant.
  • 00:11:26.237 --> 00:11:29.006
  • When jesus said, i've come to establish a different kind of
  • 00:11:29.006 --> 00:11:31.242
  • Relationship between god and man.
  • 00:11:31.242 --> 00:11:32.743
  • I'm the mediator of a brand new contract, a brand new covenant.
  • 00:11:32.743 --> 00:11:36.447
  • And in this covenant, you enter it by placing your faith in me
  • 00:11:36.447 --> 00:11:40.017
  • And there's only one rule in this covenant.
  • 00:11:40.017 --> 00:11:41.986
  • You are to love other people as i have and i am about to
  • 00:11:41.986 --> 00:11:45.489
  • Love you.
  • 00:11:45.489 --> 00:11:47.091
  • And the apostle paul says, "for we are god's creation, created
  • 00:11:47.091 --> 00:11:50.161
  • In christ jesus," check this out, "to do good works."
  • 00:11:50.161 --> 00:11:54.732
  • That means that god has something for you to do.
  • 00:11:54.732 --> 00:11:59.937
  • God has a to do list for you.
  • 00:11:59.937 --> 00:12:03.674
  • And this isn't about being good for goodness sake or even for
  • 00:12:03.674 --> 00:12:07.044
  • Your sake.
  • 00:12:07.044 --> 00:12:08.412
  • This is if you're in the new covenant, this is about being
  • 00:12:08.412 --> 00:12:10.014
  • Good for the sake of the people around you and the world's sake.
  • 00:12:10.014 --> 00:12:13.050
  • And then listen to how he caps this off.
  • 00:12:13.050 --> 00:12:15.085
  • This is so powerful.
  • 00:12:15.085 --> 00:12:16.487
  • This should move us all beyond our excuses, "which god prepared
  • 00:12:16.487 --> 00:12:23.394
  • In advance for us to do."
  • 00:12:23.394 --> 00:12:28.432
  • I mean, just suspend your agnosticism for just a minute or
  • 00:12:28.432 --> 00:12:32.303
  • Your unbelief for just a minute and just imagine, just imagine.
  • 00:12:32.303 --> 00:12:36.073
  • This is why it's called good news because anything that's
  • 00:12:36.073 --> 00:12:37.975
  • Good news, you want it to be true even before you're
  • 00:12:37.975 --> 00:12:39.543
  • Convinced the truth.
  • 00:12:39.543 --> 00:12:40.911
  • I mean, imagine how good this news is that the god who
  • 00:12:40.911 --> 00:12:45.049
  • Breathed the universe into existence.
  • 00:12:45.049 --> 00:12:49.053
  • That the god who created everything, created you and
  • 00:12:49.053 --> 00:12:52.823
  • Knows you and has a purpose for your life.
  • 00:12:52.823 --> 00:12:57.561
  • What if god has a plan and a purpose for your life?
  • 00:12:57.561 --> 00:13:03.234
  • And what if you're missing it or missing part of it because
  • 00:13:03.234 --> 00:13:08.372
  • You're hiding out and you're excusing out and you're opting
  • 00:13:08.372 --> 00:13:13.510
  • Out of that good purpose for your life because of fear,
  • 00:13:13.510 --> 00:13:17.781
  • Because of insecurity, because of something somebody who
  • 00:13:17.781 --> 00:13:20.718
  • Doesn't even know you anymore labeled you, somebody who's not
  • 00:13:20.718 --> 00:13:23.254
  • Even around anymore called you.
  • 00:13:23.254 --> 00:13:25.556
  • Because there's something in your past that just undermined
  • 00:13:25.556 --> 00:13:28.259
  • Your self-esteem and undermined your, you know, your belief in
  • 00:13:28.259 --> 00:13:31.395
  • Yourself, all of which would be understood, you know, anybody
  • 00:13:31.395 --> 00:13:33.464
  • Who hears your story would understand, but what if that is
  • 00:13:33.464 --> 00:13:36.467
  • Holding you back from the thing god created you to do?
  • 00:13:36.467 --> 00:13:41.538
  • And who god created you to be.
  • 00:13:41.538 --> 00:13:45.609
  • Now, kind of pulling back for a minute, back to just everybody.
  • 00:13:45.609 --> 00:13:49.513
  • Here's the thing, regardless if you're a religious person or not
  • 00:13:49.513 --> 00:13:51.582
  • Or a christian person or not, this is so important, okay?
  • 00:13:51.582 --> 00:13:54.485
  • Excuses, and we don't think of it this way, but it's true.
  • 00:13:54.485 --> 00:13:57.554
  • Excuses are really a subtle way of refusing to take
  • 00:13:57.554 --> 00:14:01.058
  • Responsibility for our lives.
  • 00:14:01.058 --> 00:14:04.094
  • Excuses are really a subtle way of refusing to take
  • 00:14:04.094 --> 00:14:06.597
  • Responsibility and the reason you know that to be the case is
  • 00:14:06.597 --> 00:14:09.500
  • You've seen people, you know, they've excused their
  • 00:14:09.500 --> 00:14:12.136
  • Irresponsibility with excuses.
  • 00:14:12.136 --> 00:14:14.138
  • And you look at what they could be and should be, what they
  • 00:14:14.138 --> 00:14:16.173
  • Should do and the opportunities that come their way and they
  • 00:14:16.173 --> 00:14:18.409
  • Miss out on it and you feel like, goodness, you're just
  • 00:14:18.409 --> 00:14:20.744
  • Being irresponsible with the opportunities and the gifts,
  • 00:14:20.744 --> 00:14:23.714
  • You know, that come your way.
  • 00:14:23.714 --> 00:14:25.049
  • Now, so to wrap up, here's what i wanted to do.
  • 00:14:25.049 --> 00:14:28.786
  • Here's what i decided to do.
  • 00:14:28.786 --> 00:14:30.154
  • I'm gonna give you five not so easy steps for breaking through
  • 00:14:30.154 --> 00:14:35.159
  • Paper walls that hold you back.
  • 00:14:35.159 --> 00:14:37.061
  • But before we start with the list, i need just one disclaimer
  • 00:14:37.061 --> 00:14:40.197
  • Or really it's a warning.
  • 00:14:40.197 --> 00:14:41.865
  • If you work through this list and if you take it seriously,
  • 00:14:41.865 --> 00:14:44.568
  • You're going to get your feelings hurt by you.
  • 00:14:44.568 --> 00:14:48.272
  • You are going to have to hurt your own feelings, okay?
  • 00:14:48.272 --> 00:14:52.409
  • But if you will be honest with these questions, if you'll be
  • 00:14:52.409 --> 00:14:54.945
  • Honest with this process, you're gonna discover something about
  • 00:14:54.945 --> 00:14:57.948
  • You that may have the potential that has potential maybe to
  • 00:14:57.948 --> 00:15:01.352
  • Really change the whole trajectory of your life.
  • 00:15:01.352 --> 00:15:04.021
  • It'll certainly enrich your relationships.
  • 00:15:04.021 --> 00:15:06.523
  • And the thing is this, whatever you discover may be new to you,
  • 00:15:06.523 --> 00:15:11.495
  • But it will not be new to the people around you.
  • 00:15:11.495 --> 00:15:14.732
  • In fact, when you share what you've discovered that is an
  • 00:15:14.732 --> 00:15:17.634
  • Excuse rather than a cause, you may be, you know, you may be
  • 00:15:17.634 --> 00:15:21.605
  • Excited about this new revelation.
  • 00:15:21.605 --> 00:15:23.407
  • They won't be surprised.
  • 00:15:23.407 --> 00:15:24.775
  • They're gonna be relieved because they already know just
  • 00:15:24.775 --> 00:15:30.314
  • Like you already know.
  • 00:15:30.314 --> 00:15:32.416
  • We can smell an excuse a mile off unless we're the one
  • 00:15:32.416 --> 00:15:37.921
  • Who stinks.
  • 00:15:37.921 --> 00:15:39.390
  • I just made that up.
  • 00:15:39.390 --> 00:15:40.724
  • Okay, anyway.
  • 00:15:40.724 --> 00:15:42.092
  • So here's step number one.
  • 00:15:42.092 --> 00:15:43.460
  • Everybody ready?
  • 00:15:43.460 --> 00:15:44.795
  • Step number one, here we go.
  • 00:15:44.795 --> 00:15:46.163
  • Step number one, go through this quick.
  • 00:15:46.163 --> 00:15:47.498
  • Step number one, you gotta identify 'em.
  • 00:15:47.498 --> 00:15:48.832
  • You can't abandon an excuse you have failed to identify.
  • 00:15:48.832 --> 00:15:51.435
  • And the best way to identify an excuse, we've talked about this,
  • 00:15:51.435 --> 00:15:54.405
  • The best way to identify 'em is you have to get in the habit of
  • 00:15:54.405 --> 00:15:57.074
  • Listening to your becauses.
  • 00:15:57.074 --> 00:15:59.610
  • Listen to your becauses.
  • 00:15:59.610 --> 00:16:01.545
  • I can't, because.
  • 00:16:01.545 --> 00:16:02.880
  • I quit, because.
  • 00:16:02.880 --> 00:16:04.214
  • I won't, because.
  • 00:16:04.214 --> 00:16:05.582
  • I have this debt, because.
  • 00:16:05.582 --> 00:16:06.917
  • I'm out of shape, because.
  • 00:16:06.917 --> 00:16:08.285
  • The reason i don't exercise, because.
  • 00:16:08.285 --> 00:16:09.620
  • The reason, because, because.
  • 00:16:09.620 --> 00:16:10.988
  • Listen to your becauses because we have a tendency, you know,
  • 00:16:10.988 --> 00:16:15.359
  • It's a rut in the road we just go to the same becauses over
  • 00:16:15.359 --> 00:16:18.062
  • And over.
  • 00:16:18.062 --> 00:16:19.430
  • So listen to your becauses.
  • 00:16:19.430 --> 00:16:20.764
  • And when you catch yourself becausing and you realize,
  • 00:16:20.764 --> 00:16:23.467
  • You know what?
  • 00:16:23.467 --> 00:16:24.835
  • I think i say this just about every time she comes up,
  • 00:16:24.835 --> 00:16:26.437
  • He comes up, that comes up, the past comes up, you know,
  • 00:16:26.437 --> 00:16:28.739
  • You mention that.
  • 00:16:28.739 --> 00:16:30.074
  • I want you to write it down, even when you know it's
  • 00:16:30.074 --> 00:16:32.543
  • An excuse, okay?
  • 00:16:32.543 --> 00:16:33.911
  • Step number two.
  • 00:16:33.911 --> 00:16:35.245
  • First we're gonna identify 'em.
  • 00:16:35.245 --> 00:16:36.613
  • Second, second excuse, and, okay, this one, this is where
  • 00:16:36.613 --> 00:16:40.451
  • You might hurt your own feelings, okay?
  • 00:16:40.451 --> 00:16:44.455
  • You need to interrogate your becauses.
  • 00:16:44.455 --> 00:16:47.424
  • That is, you begin to ask the question why?
  • 00:16:47.424 --> 00:16:51.261
  • For example, why, why do i immediately opt for that
  • 00:16:51.261 --> 00:16:55.399
  • Particular because?
  • 00:16:55.399 --> 00:16:56.733
  • That's you're gonna interrogate your becauses.
  • 00:16:56.733 --> 00:16:58.102
  • You got a because here or several becauses.
  • 00:16:58.102 --> 00:16:59.837
  • Okay, i'm gonna interrogate 'em, i'm gonna ask these becauses
  • 00:16:59.837 --> 00:17:01.905
  • Some questions.
  • 00:17:01.905 --> 00:17:03.240
  • Why do i immediately opt for that particular because?
  • 00:17:03.240 --> 00:17:06.710
  • You need to know.
  • 00:17:06.710 --> 00:17:08.378
  • Why do i make that excuse whenever that topic comes up,
  • 00:17:08.378 --> 00:17:11.915
  • That part of my past comes up, that relationship comes up.
  • 00:17:11.915 --> 00:17:15.419
  • Why do i immediately go to that because?
  • 00:17:15.419 --> 00:17:19.223
  • You gotta ask really hard questions like, what am i
  • 00:17:19.223 --> 00:17:21.658
  • Afraid of?
  • 00:17:21.658 --> 00:17:23.026
  • I'm not afraid of anything.
  • 00:17:23.026 --> 00:17:24.394
  • Okay, we're all afraid of something, okay, so just get
  • 00:17:24.394 --> 00:17:26.530
  • Over that one.
  • 00:17:26.530 --> 00:17:27.865
  • What am i afraid of?
  • 00:17:27.865 --> 00:17:29.233
  • What, who am i afraid of?
  • 00:17:29.233 --> 00:17:31.001
  • Who--is there somebody i'm afraid of?
  • 00:17:31.001 --> 00:17:33.403
  • Ask yourself, i know this is hard.
  • 00:17:33.403 --> 00:17:35.038
  • Am i just being lazy?
  • 00:17:35.038 --> 00:17:36.640
  • Am i just refusing to move forward because i'm just being
  • 00:17:36.640 --> 00:17:40.277
  • Lazy, which means am i just being selfish because lazy and
  • 00:17:40.277 --> 00:17:44.648
  • Selfish generally go together.
  • 00:17:44.648 --> 00:17:46.517
  • Am i just being insecure?
  • 00:17:46.517 --> 00:17:48.919
  • Is this something that i know i ought to, i know i should, but i
  • 00:17:48.919 --> 00:17:52.990
  • Don't say to people i know i ought to, i know i should.
  • 00:17:52.990 --> 00:17:55.058
  • I give them the because, because, because,
  • 00:17:55.058 --> 00:17:56.793
  • Because, because.
  • 00:17:56.793 --> 00:17:58.128
  • And don't move ahead until you have an answer, until you've
  • 00:17:58.128 --> 00:18:01.765
  • Interrogated your becauses.
  • 00:18:01.765 --> 00:18:03.700
  • And here's why.
  • 00:18:03.700 --> 00:18:05.202
  • Because this is so important.
  • 00:18:05.202 --> 00:18:06.570
  • Your answer, if you'll do this, i'm telling you, if you do this,
  • 00:18:06.570 --> 00:18:09.173
  • Your answer will clarify whether or not it's an actual reason
  • 00:18:09.173 --> 00:18:14.178
  • Because there are some actual reasons why we don't do
  • 00:18:14.178 --> 00:18:16.513
  • Certain things.
  • 00:18:16.513 --> 00:18:17.848
  • If it's an actual reason or a made up reason.
  • 00:18:17.848 --> 00:18:20.484
  • If it's an actual brick wall or just a paper wall.
  • 00:18:20.484 --> 00:18:24.721
  • And here's the thing, answering why is gonna reduce the power of
  • 00:18:24.721 --> 00:18:28.959
  • The excuse.
  • 00:18:28.959 --> 00:18:30.527
  • Anytime we bring an excuse into the light, you know
  • 00:18:30.527 --> 00:18:33.197
  • What happens?
  • 00:18:33.197 --> 00:18:34.565
  • It gets lighter. it gets lighter.
  • 00:18:34.565 --> 00:18:37.401
  • It gets smaller.
  • 00:18:37.401 --> 00:18:38.902
  • It gets sillier.
  • 00:18:38.902 --> 00:18:40.904
  • It begins to look more and more ridiculous.
  • 00:18:40.904 --> 00:18:44.508
  • It becomes disposable.
  • 00:18:44.508 --> 00:18:47.911
  • Suddenly it's much easier to leave behind.
  • 00:18:47.911 --> 00:18:53.116
  • Third step is this, it's gonna re-label 'em.
  • 00:18:53.116 --> 00:18:56.286
  • That's not a reason.
  • 00:18:56.286 --> 00:18:58.088
  • That's not how you look in the mirror, you just tell yourself,
  • 00:18:58.088 --> 00:18:59.690
  • You know what?
  • 00:18:59.690 --> 00:19:01.024
  • That's not a reason. that's an excuse.
  • 00:19:01.024 --> 00:19:03.660
  • And you say it out loud.
  • 00:19:03.660 --> 00:19:05.028
  • And here's the thing, you can say this, you know what?
  • 00:19:05.028 --> 00:19:06.496
  • This is an excuse i created.
  • 00:19:06.496 --> 00:19:08.765
  • This is an excuse, this is a paper wall that i built.
  • 00:19:08.765 --> 00:19:11.902
  • And here's the great liberating news.
  • 00:19:11.902 --> 00:19:14.004
  • And if i built it, in other words, if i created this wall
  • 00:19:14.004 --> 00:19:19.009
  • That's not even really a wall, if i built it, i can tear
  • 00:19:19.009 --> 00:19:24.014
  • It down.
  • 00:19:24.014 --> 00:19:25.349
  • I'm not a victim.
  • 00:19:25.349 --> 00:19:26.717
  • I'm not a prisoner to my past.
  • 00:19:26.717 --> 00:19:28.852
  • I'm not a prisoner to what i've been labeled.
  • 00:19:28.852 --> 00:19:30.821
  • I'm not a prisoner to the fact that i tried and failed once.
  • 00:19:30.821 --> 00:19:33.290
  • I'm not a prisoner to my fear.
  • 00:19:33.290 --> 00:19:35.525
  • I've been created by god to do stuff.
  • 00:19:35.525 --> 00:19:38.528
  • If i'm a creation, i'm a means to an end and i wanna know what
  • 00:19:38.528 --> 00:19:42.132
  • The end is, and i'm not gonna spend my life hiding behind
  • 00:19:42.132 --> 00:19:45.669
  • A paper wall and live my whole life and get to the end and
  • 00:19:45.669 --> 00:19:49.139
  • Never know what i was ultimately born to be a means to an end for
  • 00:19:49.139 --> 00:19:54.344
  • Or for whom i was born to be a means to an end.
  • 00:19:54.344 --> 00:19:59.383
  • I've got a life to live.
  • 00:19:59.383 --> 00:20:01.151
  • I've got a world to improve.
  • 00:20:01.151 --> 00:20:03.020
  • And now, you're on your way.
  • 00:20:03.020 --> 00:20:06.290
  • Now you're on your way.
  • 00:20:06.290 --> 00:20:07.658
  • Now there's nobody else to blame.
  • 00:20:07.658 --> 00:20:08.992
  • Now there's no other reason to hide here.
  • 00:20:08.992 --> 00:20:10.494
  • Now you hold all the cards.
  • 00:20:10.494 --> 00:20:12.729
  • Now you're in the driver's seat.
  • 00:20:12.729 --> 00:20:15.098
  • You got, you cut ties with the lies, right?
  • 00:20:15.098 --> 00:20:18.935
  • You disabled the labels.
  • 00:20:18.935 --> 00:20:21.371
  • One more.
  • 00:20:21.371 --> 00:20:22.739
  • I like this one.
  • 00:20:22.739 --> 00:20:24.074
  • You just sent your justification on a permanent vacation.
  • 00:20:24.074 --> 00:20:26.677
  • That's some good preaching.
  • 00:20:26.677 --> 00:20:28.011
  • I'm not really that good of a preacher, but i like that one.
  • 00:20:28.011 --> 00:20:29.780
  • Anyway, the point is, once you're willing to make this
  • 00:20:29.780 --> 00:20:32.582
  • Discovery, once you're willing to step into this and
  • 00:20:32.582 --> 00:20:34.351
  • Acknowledge it, acknowledge it with yourself, the truth, the
  • 00:20:34.351 --> 00:20:38.555
  • Truth has begun to set you free.
  • 00:20:38.555 --> 00:20:41.024
  • Free to be, free to love, free to do, free to be fully who god
  • 00:20:41.024 --> 00:20:47.764
  • Made you to be.
  • 00:20:47.764 --> 00:20:50.200
  • Step number four.
  • 00:20:50.200 --> 00:20:53.403
  • This is the nail in the coffin, okay?
  • 00:20:51.535 --> 00:20:55.005
  • In fact, if you don't do anything else and you realize
  • 00:20:55.005 --> 00:20:58.809
  • That you've got a paper wall in your life, just one, if you've
  • 00:20:58.809 --> 00:21:01.511
  • Identified one excuse, and maybe before, maybe you've known for
  • 00:21:01.511 --> 00:21:04.581
  • Years, if you'll just take that one excuse and you'll do step
  • 00:21:04.581 --> 00:21:08.618
  • Number four, this may give you the energy and the courage to
  • 00:21:08.618 --> 00:21:12.222
  • Punch through.
  • 00:21:12.222 --> 00:21:13.557
  • Step number four is to answer this question.
  • 00:21:13.557 --> 00:21:16.893
  • What do i lose if i continue to excuse?
  • 00:21:16.893 --> 00:21:20.764
  • What do i lose if i continue to excuse?
  • 00:21:20.764 --> 00:21:25.068
  • What do i give up?
  • 00:21:25.068 --> 00:21:27.104
  • What do i walk away from?
  • 00:21:27.104 --> 00:21:29.106
  • What do i miss out on?
  • 00:21:29.106 --> 00:21:32.109
  • What do you give up? who do you give up?
  • 00:21:32.109 --> 00:21:34.811
  • What do you miss out on?
  • 00:21:34.811 --> 00:21:36.179
  • Who ends up missing out on you?
  • 00:21:36.179 --> 00:21:38.782
  • Who for your entire marriage or your entire relationship with
  • 00:21:38.782 --> 00:21:41.351
  • Them wonders if they're ever gonna have all of you?
  • 00:21:41.351 --> 00:21:44.554
  • What is the price you're paying for living behind that
  • 00:21:44.554 --> 00:21:48.125
  • Paper wall?
  • 00:21:48.125 --> 00:21:49.493
  • What is that one excuse costing you?
  • 00:21:49.493 --> 00:21:53.930
  • You'll discover that the price, you know, this, the price is
  • 00:21:53.930 --> 00:21:58.268
  • Just too high.
  • 00:21:58.268 --> 00:22:01.605
  • Because there are no do-overs.
  • 00:22:01.605 --> 00:22:04.741
  • There are no do-overs in the arenas of life that matter most.
  • 00:22:04.741 --> 00:22:09.446
  • You only have one first marriage, right?
  • 00:22:09.446 --> 00:22:11.615
  • You only get one body to take care of.
  • 00:22:11.615 --> 00:22:14.651
  • And if you don't take care of your body, do you know what
  • 00:22:14.651 --> 00:22:16.586
  • You're assuming?
  • 00:22:16.586 --> 00:22:17.921
  • You're assuming some other body is gonna take care of your body
  • 00:22:17.921 --> 00:22:20.891
  • And you're gonna get to the end of your life and realize all
  • 00:22:20.891 --> 00:22:23.293
  • Those reasons i gave for not taking care of my health, they
  • 00:22:23.293 --> 00:22:26.296
  • Were paper walls and it's too late to go back.
  • 00:22:26.296 --> 00:22:28.932
  • All those excuses i gave for not managing my finances more
  • 00:22:28.932 --> 00:22:31.902
  • Responsibly, paper walls and it's too late to go back.
  • 00:22:31.902 --> 00:22:34.738
  • All those excuses i gave for not reconnecting, not forgiving,
  • 00:22:34.738 --> 00:22:37.774
  • Not, you know, reconciling, all of those were just paper walls,
  • 00:22:37.774 --> 00:22:40.977
  • Paper walls, and now it's too late to go back because in the
  • 00:22:40.977 --> 00:22:43.747
  • Arenas of life that matter most, when time is gone, oftentimes
  • 00:22:43.747 --> 00:22:48.752
  • The opportunity is gone as well.
  • 00:22:48.752 --> 00:22:51.321
  • And you don't wanna live that way.
  • 00:22:51.321 --> 00:22:52.923
  • You don't wanna get to the end of your life and look back
  • 00:22:52.923 --> 00:22:54.825
  • On regret.
  • 00:22:54.825 --> 00:22:56.193
  • And you know what regret is?
  • 00:22:56.193 --> 00:22:57.527
  • Regret is, i should have, i could have, but i didn't.
  • 00:22:57.527 --> 00:23:04.201
  • I should have, i could have, but i didn't.
  • 00:23:04.201 --> 00:23:09.072
  • And every single time somebody confronted me about what
  • 00:23:09.072 --> 00:23:12.642
  • I should have done and could have done, i had an answer.
  • 00:23:12.642 --> 00:23:17.113
  • But my becauses weren't the cause, they were just
  • 00:23:17.113 --> 00:23:20.350
  • Paper walls.
  • 00:23:20.350 --> 00:23:23.520
  • And i don't know you personally, but i know you don't wanna to
  • 00:23:23.520 --> 00:23:27.457
  • Live that way and you don't wanna end up that way and you
  • 00:23:27.457 --> 00:23:30.894
  • Don't wanna look back on that and i don't wanna look back on
  • 00:23:30.894 --> 00:23:34.364
  • That either.
  • 00:23:34.364 --> 00:23:38.168
  • Step number five though.
  • 00:23:38.168 --> 00:23:39.569
  • Step number five is for extra credit and it's tell somebody.
  • 00:23:39.569 --> 00:23:42.739
  • I actually did this recently, about two or three, about two
  • 00:23:42.739 --> 00:23:45.842
  • And a half months ago.
  • 00:23:45.842 --> 00:23:47.177
  • I'm in the kitchen with some of our, with our family and my
  • 00:23:47.177 --> 00:23:50.180
  • Daughter-in-law was there.
  • 00:23:50.180 --> 00:23:51.515
  • And she said, you know, she calls me mr. andy, i guess it's
  • 00:23:51.515 --> 00:23:54.885
  • Not mr. stanley, it's not andy, it's in between that's okay.
  • 00:23:54.885 --> 00:23:57.053
  • "mr. andy," she said,
  • 00:23:57.053 --> 00:23:58.388
  • I think you should--" and my two sons were are like,
  • 00:23:58.388 --> 00:24:00.790
  • "dad, yeah, you should."
  • 00:24:00.790 --> 00:24:02.158
  • And this is something that comes up pretty often.
  • 00:24:02.158 --> 00:24:04.227
  • And i immediately went to my because.
  • 00:24:04.227 --> 00:24:05.929
  • Well, i can't do that because.
  • 00:24:05.929 --> 00:24:07.497
  • I can't do that because.
  • 00:24:07.497 --> 00:24:08.832
  • And as soon as it came out of my mouth because i was already
  • 00:24:08.832 --> 00:24:10.734
  • Working on this content, i'm like, there it is.
  • 00:24:10.734 --> 00:24:13.136
  • Every time this comes up and it's not even a big deal, every
  • 00:24:13.136 --> 00:24:15.939
  • Time this topic comes up, i immediately retreat to why i
  • 00:24:15.939 --> 00:24:20.644
  • Can't and why i shouldn't try.
  • 00:24:20.644 --> 00:24:23.413
  • And i called myself out on it later i said to her, i said to
  • 00:24:23.413 --> 00:24:26.149
  • Danielle, i said, "you know what the other day when you brought
  • 00:24:26.149 --> 00:24:27.751
  • That up and i said, you know, i said what i said because that's
  • 00:24:27.751 --> 00:24:29.753
  • What i always say."
  • 00:24:29.753 --> 00:24:31.087
  • I said, "you know what?
  • 00:24:31.087 --> 00:24:32.422
  • That's an excuse. that's an excuse.
  • 00:24:32.422 --> 00:24:35.125
  • And i'm glad you brought it up again."
  • 00:24:35.125 --> 00:24:36.493
  • And she kind of smiled, which meant, i know we all know that's
  • 00:24:36.493 --> 00:24:38.828
  • An excuse.
  • 00:24:38.828 --> 00:24:40.163
  • And when you give the same reason every time, i don't wanna
  • 00:24:40.163 --> 00:24:41.965
  • Live there, i don't want you to live there.
  • 00:24:41.965 --> 00:24:44.034
  • So just tell somebody.
  • 00:24:44.034 --> 00:24:46.603
  • Imagine, i mean this is hard to imagine.
  • 00:24:46.603 --> 00:24:48.705
  • Imagine if everybody in our community decided to live
  • 00:24:48.705 --> 00:24:52.976
  • This way.
  • 00:24:52.976 --> 00:24:54.344
  • Imagine if everybody came clean with their excuses, what would
  • 00:24:54.344 --> 00:24:58.481
  • Happen in our world or in our community, our nation,
  • 00:24:58.481 --> 00:25:02.018
  • Our families.
  • 00:25:02.018 --> 00:25:03.954
  • Last thing.
  • 00:25:03.954 --> 00:25:05.322
  • And i've kind of said this, but i just wanna say it
  • 00:25:05.322 --> 00:25:07.190
  • One more time.
  • 00:25:07.190 --> 00:25:08.825
  • If you don't deal with this, if you don't identify your excuses,
  • 00:25:08.825 --> 00:25:14.798
  • You're gonna excuse your life away and that's too high a price
  • 00:25:14.798 --> 00:25:21.738
  • To pay.
  • 00:25:21.738 --> 00:25:23.073
  • You were created by god to be a means to an end, and until you
  • 00:25:23.073 --> 00:25:27.944
  • Discover what that end is, there's always gonna be
  • 00:25:27.944 --> 00:25:30.547
  • Something missing in you because you were made, you were made in
  • 00:25:30.547 --> 00:25:34.718
  • The image of god, you are an image bearer, you are
  • 00:25:34.718 --> 00:25:38.888
  • A purpose bearer.
  • 00:25:38.888 --> 00:25:40.690
  • And anything that's an obstacle to discovering what that is and
  • 00:25:40.690 --> 00:25:43.526
  • Doing it, you just need to get rid of it.
  • 00:25:43.526 --> 00:25:48.064
  • You were created to do something in the world, for the world, for
  • 00:25:48.064 --> 00:25:50.834
  • The people in the world.
  • 00:25:50.834 --> 00:25:52.502
  • So let's--can we just decide, you know what?
  • 00:25:52.502 --> 00:25:55.271
  • No more excuses.
  • 00:25:55.271 --> 00:25:57.040
  • No more hiding.
  • 00:25:57.040 --> 00:25:58.575
  • I'm gonna make up my mind.
  • 00:25:58.575 --> 00:26:00.577
  • No more paper walls.
  • 00:26:00.577 --> 00:26:01.945
  • From now i'm just gonna admit it.
  • 00:26:01.945 --> 00:26:03.279
  • You know, i said because, but i just wanna stop and say that's
  • 00:26:03.279 --> 00:26:05.415
  • Not really the beca--that's not really the cause.
  • 00:26:05.415 --> 00:26:07.517
  • The real reason is that just scares me.
  • 00:26:07.517 --> 00:26:11.254
  • The real reason is that just reminds me.
  • 00:26:11.254 --> 00:26:14.324
  • The real reason is, i'm afraid of what's on the other side.
  • 00:26:14.324 --> 00:26:17.994
  • The real reason is i don't even know why i say that, but i just
  • 00:26:17.994 --> 00:26:21.564
  • Wanna stop myself and let you know that's not a reason.
  • 00:26:21.564 --> 00:26:25.101
  • That's just an excuse.
  • 00:26:25.101 --> 00:26:28.672
  • Because, after all, there are just two kinds of people in
  • 00:26:28.672 --> 00:26:33.309
  • The world.
  • 00:26:33.309 --> 00:26:35.578
  • There are people who are not you.
  • 00:26:35.578 --> 00:26:39.716
  • And there's someone who is you.
  • 00:26:39.716 --> 00:26:44.454
  • And only you can do what god created you to do.
  • 00:26:44.454 --> 00:26:51.194
  • Andy: hey, thanks so much for watching.
  • 00:26:51.194 --> 00:26:52.862
  • You may find it hard to believe that 75 million americans claim
  • 00:26:52.862 --> 00:26:56.266
  • No religious affiliation.
  • 00:26:56.266 --> 00:26:58.401
  • On a personal note, perhaps you found it nearly impossible to
  • 00:26:58.401 --> 00:27:01.504
  • Believe that your son or your daughter or perhaps a grandchild
  • 00:27:01.504 --> 00:27:04.374
  • Drifted away from faith as part of that number.
  • 00:27:04.374 --> 00:27:07.210
  • This is a crisis culturally and perhaps for you it's
  • 00:27:07.210 --> 00:27:10.213
  • A crisis personally.
  • 00:27:10.213 --> 00:27:11.548
  • At "your move," we are committed to addressing that crisis.
  • 00:27:11.548 --> 00:27:15.485
  • We actually have a plan to solve it, but we need your help.
  • 00:27:15.485 --> 00:27:18.388
  • We've developed a digital online tool that invites people to take
  • 00:27:18.388 --> 00:27:21.791
  • A personal assessment that launches them on a journey that
  • 00:27:21.791 --> 00:27:25.195
  • Eventually intersects their questions with the teaching of
  • 00:27:25.195 --> 00:27:28.498
  • Jesus and ultimately with a bible teaching church in
  • 00:27:28.498 --> 00:27:32.268
  • Their community.
  • 00:27:32.268 --> 00:27:33.603
  • Tens of thousands of people are currently engaged in this
  • 00:27:33.603 --> 00:27:36.039
  • Process, but we need your help to continue creating the bread
  • 00:27:36.039 --> 00:27:39.676
  • Crumbs, the content that keeps them moving forward on their
  • 00:27:39.676 --> 00:27:43.179
  • Faith journey.
  • 00:27:43.179 --> 00:27:44.581
  • We're attempting something that no one has ever attempted before
  • 00:27:44.581 --> 00:27:47.751
  • And it is already working.
  • 00:27:47.751 --> 00:27:49.586
  • To find out more, go to the website or call the number at
  • 00:27:49.586 --> 00:27:52.388
  • The bottom of the screen and as always, thank you so much for
  • 00:27:52.388 --> 00:27:55.525
  • Watching and now it's your move.
  • 00:27:55.525 --> 00:28:20.950
  • ...
  • 00:28:24.187 --> 00:28:29.010