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Dr. Robert Jeffress

Robert Jeffress - Say Goodbye To Sexual Regrets (Part 2)

May 27, 2025 | S25:E251

Robert Jeffress - Say Goodbye To Sexual Regrets (Part 2)
Pathway to Victory offers a practical application of God’s Word to everyday life through the clear, biblical teaching of Pastor Jeffress.
#Faith #Forgiveness #Religion #Confession/PowerofWords #WordofGod #Righteousness #inActive #Dr.RobertJeffress #RobertJeffress #Rebellion #Redemption #Mercy #Adultery #SexOutsideofMarriage #1John1:9

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Dr. Robert Jeffress | Robert Jeffress - Say Goodbye To Sexual Regrets (Part 2) | May 27, 2025
  • ...
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  • ♪♪♪
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  • Male announcer: from the pulpit of the first baptist church of
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  • Dallas, texas, this is "pathway to victory" with dr.
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  • Robert jeffress.
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  • Dr. robert jeffress: hi, i'm robert jeffress,
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  • And welcome again to "pathway to victory."
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  • When god created adam and eve, he designed an intimate
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  • Expression of love between marriage partners.
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  • But tragically, countless relationships have been
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  • Destroyed because of infidelity.
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  • So how does a couple recover from sexual sin?
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  • Is there any hope for redemption?
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  • My message is titled "say goodbye to sexual regrets" on
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  • Today's edition of "pathway to victory."
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  • ♪♪♪
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  • Announcer: god doesn't want you to carry around the weight of
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  • Sins he's already forgiven.
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  • In his bestselling book, "say goodbye to regret," dr. robert
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  • Jeffress helps you live beyond the would-haves, could-haves,
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  • And should-haves to embrace the future god has planned for you.
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  • You can't undo the past, but there's plenty you can do to
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  • Reshape tomorrow and eternity.
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  • Discover the biblical secrets for regret-free living when you
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  • Request the book, "say goodbye to regret."
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  • Thank you for giving generously to "pathway to victory."
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  • ♪♪♪
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  • Jeffress: every hour of every day, every wrong thought we
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  • Have, every wrong attitude we have,
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  • Every wrong action we commit,
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  • All of those things keep adding to our sin debt.
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  • We go further and further in the hole with god every day that
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  • We live.
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  • Romans 6:23 says it this way: "for the wages of sin is death,"
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  • Eternal death from god.
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  • Without jesus christ, we all die with a spiritual deficit, with a
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  • Negative balance in our spiritual bank account.
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  • We have to acknowledge that.
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  • If we're going to be forgiven of our sin, we have to acknowledge
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  • That we need god's forgiveness, that we can't pay for
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  • It ourselves.
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  • And that leads to the second thing we need to do, and that is
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  • We need to receive god's forgiveness.
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  • Now, here's the great news of the gospel.
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  • Even though i can't deposit anything in my heavenly bank
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  • Account, there stands somebody who can and is willing if we ask
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  • Him to.
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  • That's what jesus christ did when he died on the cross for
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  • Our sins.
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  • In 2 corinthians 5:21, remember that passage?
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  • "god made him, jesus, who knew no sin, to be sin for us, that
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  • We might become the righteousness of god in him."
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  • I used that illustration a few weeks ago of the two books with
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  • The two covers, "the story of robert jeffress" and "the story
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  • Of jesus christ," and how god switched the covers on the
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  • Cro--at the cross so that jesus took all of my spiritual debit,
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  • So to speak, and he gave me all his righteousness credits so
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  • That when i become a christian, god takes all of the
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  • Righteousness of jesus and he deposits it in my spiritual
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  • Bank account.
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  • So it doesn't matter how many checks i write against it, i
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  • Cannot deplete the wonderful riches of the grace of god.
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  • That's what becoming a christian means.
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  • But if i'm going to receive god's forgiveness, i have to ask
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  • For it.
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  • 1 john 1:9, "if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to
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  • Forgive us our sins and to cleanse us of
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  • All unrighteousness."
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  • We must acknowledge we need god's forgiveness, but secondly,
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  • We must receive god's forgiveness.
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  • The moment we become a christian, god forgives us.
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  • Look at colossians 2, verse 13.
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  • I'm gonna talk about verse 14 next sunday when we take the
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  • Lord's supper together, but look at verse 13: "when you were dead
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  • In your transgressions and the uncircumcision of your flesh,
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  • God made you alive together with christ," and here's the best
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  • Part, "having forgiven us," what?
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  • "all, all our transgressions."
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  • When christ forgives you, he doesn't forgive you just of
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  • Those little itty-bitty sins.
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  • I'm sorry i didn't smile at you today.
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  • Not just the little sins, he forgives us of those
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  • Humongous sins.
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  • He forgives us of that sin you hope to god nobody will ever
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  • Discover, the sin that would make you crawl under the pew if
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  • It were projected on the imag up here.
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  • All of those sins he has forgiven.
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  • He has nailed to the cross of jesus christ and
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  • Said, "tetelestai.
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  • Paid in full.
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  • It is finished," that's the great news of the gospel, and
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  • That's the forgiveness that awaits everyone.
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  • "well, pastor, you said i'm forgiven, but that doesn't erase
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  • The consequences.
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  • How can there be anything positive that comes from these
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  • Painful consequences?"
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  • Even the consequences, ladies and gentlemen, is a sign of
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  • God's grace.
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  • Let me show you what i mean.
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  • Number three: view your adverse consequences from immorality as
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  • A vaccination against future mistakes.
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  • Do you remember--i'm probably dating myself.
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  • Back in grade school, those of you who are about my age back in
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  • 1960, they started giving polio vaccinations, and the way they
  • 00:05:37.560 --> 00:05:43.166
  • Administered those vaccinations mostly was not through a shot.
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  • It was through a little sugar cube you would take, and that
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  • Sugar cube would be doused with a form of the polio virus, and
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  • They tried to make it taste better with that sugar cube.
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  • But i can still taste today how awful that was because it didn't
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  • Erase the bad taste.
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  • Why did it taste so bad?
  • 00:06:08.858 --> 00:06:10.193
  • Because you were actually taking a weaker form of the polio virus
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  • So that your body, instead of being completely destroyed,
  • 00:06:16.232 --> 00:06:19.769
  • Would develop the immunities you needed to inoculate yourself
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  • Against having the real disease later on.
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  • Now, in a lot of ways, god allows us to experience
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  • Distasteful consequences of our sin to inoculate us against
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  • Future similar mistakes.
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  • Some years ago, a man, i'll just call him jack, came to see me,
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  • And he said, "pastor, i don't know what to do."
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  • He said, "i got involved in an emotional, not a physical, but
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  • An emotional affair at work.
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  • It sapped my energy for two years.
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  • I focused on this other person.
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  • I thought at one time i'd leave my wife and marry her, but god
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  • Really dealt with me about it, and i felt guilty, and so i
  • 00:07:03.946 --> 00:07:08.184
  • Broke off the relationship, but i'm still experiencing the
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  • Consequences of it.
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  • During that time, because i wasn't paying attention to my
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  • Work, i lost my business.
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  • My wife and i still have a distant relationship even after
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  • I confessed the mistake.
  • 00:07:21.898 --> 00:07:23.299
  • If god has forgiven me, why do i experience these consequences?"
  • 00:07:23.299 --> 00:07:28.304
  • I didn't know what to say.
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  • I'm not gonna say this came from god, but i did get an idea.
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  • I said, "jack, let me ask you something.
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  • How likely are you to engage in any kind of an affair again with
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  • Another woman?"
  • 00:07:39.749 --> 00:07:41.083
  • He said, "oh, pastor, every time i see a woman now i run in the
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  • Opposite direction."
  • 00:07:44.020 --> 00:07:46.856
  • I said, "well, have you always been that way?
  • 00:07:46.856 --> 00:07:48.925
  • Has that always been your attitude towards?"
  • 00:07:48.925 --> 00:07:50.560
  • "no," he said, "i used to be quite a flirt."
  • 00:07:50.560 --> 00:07:53.829
  • So i said, "in a way, this mistake of yours has inoculated
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  • You against future mistakes."
  • 00:07:58.234 --> 00:08:02.038
  • He said, "well, i never thought of it that way, but
  • 00:08:02.038 --> 00:08:04.440
  • That's right."
  • 00:08:04.440 --> 00:08:05.808
  • I said, "well, why don't we have a prayer of thanksgiving
  • 00:08:05.808 --> 00:08:08.144
  • Right now?"
  • 00:08:08.144 --> 00:08:09.512
  • He said, "thanksgiving?"
  • 00:08:09.512 --> 00:08:10.846
  • I said, "yeah, let's thank god."
  • 00:08:10.846 --> 00:08:12.214
  • He said, "thank god for my affair?"
  • 00:08:12.214 --> 00:08:14.650
  • I said, "no, not thanking god for your affair, but thanking
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  • God for his mercy, that he allowed your family to stay
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  • Together, to thank him for his grace, knowing you're not going
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  • To hell for this mistake, and yes, thanking you that--thanking
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  • God that you're more immune from these kind of affairs in the
  • 00:08:29.131 --> 00:08:32.268
  • Future than you've ever been," and i believe that's how we need
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  • To look at these consequences.
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  • By the way, that's not original with me.
  • 00:08:37.673 --> 00:08:40.676
  • Solomon talks about that over and over again.
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  • He has a word for consequences.
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  • They're called reproofs.
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  • Throughout the book of proverbs you find solomon saying that we
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  • Need to learn from the reproofs of life.
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  • What are reproofs?
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  • They are corrections, discipline, painful consequences
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  • God sends into our life to prevent those consequences again
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  • In the future.
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  • Listen to what proverbs says about reproofs.
  • 00:09:06.402 --> 00:09:08.971
  • Proverbs 13:18, "poverty and shame will come to one who
  • 00:09:08.971 --> 00:09:12.975
  • Neglects discipline.
  • 00:09:12.975 --> 00:09:14.610
  • But he who regards, who learns from reproofs, will be honored."
  • 00:09:14.610 --> 00:09:19.682
  • Or proverbs 15:5, "a fool rejects his father's discipline.
  • 00:09:19.682 --> 00:09:24.153
  • But he who respects reproof is sensible."
  • 00:09:24.153 --> 00:09:28.157
  • Or proverbs 15:31, "he whose ears listen to the life-giving.
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  • Reproof will dwell among the wise."
  • 00:09:32.995 --> 00:09:37.433
  • Number four: if you're gonna avoid regrets against future
  • 00:09:37.433 --> 00:09:41.170
  • Sexual immorality, avoid tempting situations.
  • 00:09:41.170 --> 00:09:46.342
  • Avoid tempting situations.
  • 00:09:46.342 --> 00:09:49.011
  • Students, i used to be the youth minister here.
  • 00:09:49.011 --> 00:09:52.248
  • And when i was youth minister, i had a guy, he was a junior in
  • 00:09:52.248 --> 00:09:55.351
  • High school, come to see me, one of the most outstanding guys in
  • 00:09:55.351 --> 00:09:58.287
  • Our youth division, and he said, "robert, i've got a problem.
  • 00:09:58.287 --> 00:10:01.590
  • I don't know what to do about it."
  • 00:10:01.590 --> 00:10:02.958
  • I said, "well, what is it?"
  • 00:10:02.958 --> 00:10:04.293
  • He said, "i'm really having trouble with my thought life.
  • 00:10:04.293 --> 00:10:07.096
  • I'm having a hard time keeping wrong thoughts about girls from
  • 00:10:07.096 --> 00:10:11.167
  • Entering my mind."
  • 00:10:11.167 --> 00:10:12.802
  • And i said, "well, when do these thoughts tend to come?"
  • 00:10:12.802 --> 00:10:17.707
  • I swear i'm not making this up.
  • 00:10:17.707 --> 00:10:19.442
  • He said, "usually when i'm looking at the pictures
  • 00:10:19.442 --> 00:10:22.211
  • In playboy."
  • 00:10:22.211 --> 00:10:25.581
  • I almost laughed out loud.
  • 00:10:25.581 --> 00:10:28.217
  • I said, "well, cancel your subscription!"
  • 00:10:28.217 --> 00:10:32.655
  • Now, we laughed at that and said, "that's the dumbest thing
  • 00:10:32.655 --> 00:10:34.890
  • I've ever heard."
  • 00:10:34.890 --> 00:10:36.225
  • We do the same thing.
  • 00:10:36.225 --> 00:10:37.593
  • We wonder, "why am i in such temptation right now?"
  • 00:10:37.593 --> 00:10:41.430
  • Because we've gotten ourselves in a situation that nobody
  • 00:10:41.430 --> 00:10:44.200
  • Can handle.
  • 00:10:44.200 --> 00:10:45.568
  • The bible says over and over again, "flee youthful lust."
  • 00:10:45.568 --> 00:10:49.205
  • Don't see how close you can get to the edge of the immorality
  • 00:10:49.205 --> 00:10:52.575
  • Without crossing the line.
  • 00:10:52.575 --> 00:10:54.443
  • You ought to run from that line as far and as fast as you can.
  • 00:10:54.443 --> 00:10:58.948
  • How do you do that?
  • 00:10:58.948 --> 00:11:00.316
  • Let me give some specific ways to avoid tempting situations.
  • 00:11:00.316 --> 00:11:04.220
  • Number one: refuse to have any relationship with a member of
  • 00:11:04.220 --> 00:11:08.057
  • The opposite sex that you are unwilling to tell your
  • 00:11:08.057 --> 00:11:12.061
  • Mate about.
  • 00:11:12.061 --> 00:11:13.429
  • Now, that's key.
  • 00:11:13.429 --> 00:11:15.030
  • It's not just refuse to have any relationship with a member
  • 00:11:15.030 --> 00:11:17.666
  • Of the opposite sex.
  • 00:11:17.666 --> 00:11:19.034
  • Can you imagine if i, as pastor, did that?
  • 00:11:19.034 --> 00:11:21.637
  • And i said, "i'm just not gonna talk to women at all in
  • 00:11:21.637 --> 00:11:24.340
  • The church.
  • 00:11:24.340 --> 00:11:25.708
  • I'm just not gonna have any relationship with them."
  • 00:11:25.708 --> 00:11:27.543
  • Well, i'd be run out of here if i said that.
  • 00:11:27.543 --> 00:11:30.279
  • Women make up more than 50% of our congregation.
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  • No.
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  • The key is don't have any relationship with a woman you
  • 00:11:34.483 --> 00:11:38.154
  • Are trying to hide from your mate, that you're unwilling to
  • 00:11:38.154 --> 00:11:41.157
  • Tell your mate about.
  • 00:11:41.157 --> 00:11:43.025
  • Don't send any text that you wouldn't be happy for your mate
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  • To read or make any phone calls or arrange any meetings.
  • 00:11:46.428 --> 00:11:50.499
  • Secondly, reserve your most intimate thoughts for your mate.
  • 00:11:50.499 --> 00:11:55.905
  • Did you know the most important organ in the sexual act is
  • 00:11:55.905 --> 00:12:02.645
  • The brain?
  • 00:12:02.645 --> 00:12:04.213
  • It's the brain.
  • 00:12:04.213 --> 00:12:05.581
  • Sex doesn't begin in the bedroom.
  • 00:12:05.581 --> 00:12:07.850
  • It begins in the mind.
  • 00:12:07.850 --> 00:12:09.585
  • It's emotional bonding with people that leads to a physical
  • 00:12:09.585 --> 00:12:13.422
  • Bonding with people, and so if you're married, save your
  • 00:12:13.422 --> 00:12:18.828
  • Deepest emotions, your happiness, your disappointments,
  • 00:12:18.828 --> 00:12:23.365
  • Your fears for that other person, your mate, not
  • 00:12:23.365 --> 00:12:26.869
  • Anybody else.
  • 00:12:26.869 --> 00:12:28.237
  • Proverbs 4:23 says, "watch over your heart with all diligence.
  • 00:12:28.237 --> 00:12:33.075
  • For from it flows the springs of life."
  • 00:12:33.075 --> 00:12:37.079
  • Number three: if you want to avoid tempting situations,
  • 00:12:37.079 --> 00:12:41.116
  • Refrain from meeting alone with members of the opposite sex.
  • 00:12:41.116 --> 00:12:45.454
  • I'm talking primarily to married people here, but refrain from
  • 00:12:45.454 --> 00:12:49.458
  • Meeting alone with members of the opposite sex.
  • 00:12:49.458 --> 00:12:53.329
  • One of the things i so appreciated about our pastor,
  • 00:12:53.329 --> 00:12:56.699
  • Dr. criswell, was for the years of his ministry, there was never
  • 00:12:56.699 --> 00:13:01.070
  • A taint of sexual immorality, not at all.
  • 00:13:01.070 --> 00:13:04.874
  • And he was very rabid about following this principle.
  • 00:13:04.874 --> 00:13:10.012
  • One of the ladies who was on staff when dr. criswell was
  • 00:13:10.012 --> 00:13:13.649
  • Pastor here told me this story years later.
  • 00:13:13.649 --> 00:13:16.552
  • She said one night she was leaving the church, and it was a
  • 00:13:16.552 --> 00:13:20.556
  • Torrential, frog-strangling downpour that we experience here
  • 00:13:20.556 --> 00:13:26.729
  • In texas sometimes, and she got in her car and was driving away
  • 00:13:26.729 --> 00:13:30.199
  • When she saw dr. criswell walking in the rain without an
  • 00:13:30.199 --> 00:13:34.303
  • Umbrella, going from the old criswell building over to his
  • 00:13:34.303 --> 00:13:38.140
  • Car in the veal parking lot.
  • 00:13:38.140 --> 00:13:40.242
  • And she pulled up her car and lowered the window and
  • 00:13:40.242 --> 00:13:43.812
  • Said, "dr. criswell,
  • 00:13:43.812 --> 00:13:45.147
  • Get in here, and i'll drive you to your car.
  • 00:13:45.147 --> 00:13:48.484
  • You're gonna drown."
  • 00:13:48.484 --> 00:13:49.985
  • He said, "honey, it would be better for me to drown than to
  • 00:13:49.985 --> 00:13:54.123
  • Be seen getting in the car with you all alone," and he continued
  • 00:13:54.123 --> 00:13:58.427
  • To walk.
  • 00:13:58.427 --> 00:13:59.795
  • Now that's what you call wisdom.
  • 00:13:59.795 --> 00:14:02.631
  • Wisdom.
  • 00:14:02.631 --> 00:14:04.233
  • Compare that wisdom with the foolishness of a man that the
  • 00:14:04.233 --> 00:14:09.204
  • Writer of proverbs describes as a man lacking in sense.
  • 00:14:09.204 --> 00:14:14.376
  • Some people have called this passage from proverbs 7 "anatomy
  • 00:14:14.376 --> 00:14:18.514
  • Of a seduction."
  • 00:14:18.514 --> 00:14:19.882
  • Look at this in verse 6 of proverbs 7: "for at the window
  • 00:14:19.882 --> 00:14:22.918
  • Of my house i looked out through my lattice and i saw among the
  • 00:14:22.918 --> 00:14:26.622
  • Naive, and discerned among the youths a young man
  • 00:14:26.622 --> 00:14:30.459
  • Lacking sense.
  • 00:14:30.459 --> 00:14:31.794
  • Passing through the street near her corner; he takes the way to
  • 00:14:31.794 --> 00:14:36.532
  • Her house."
  • 00:14:36.532 --> 00:14:37.900
  • And what does she say?
  • 00:14:37.900 --> 00:14:39.601
  • This isn't a necessarily a prostitute as we think of it but
  • 00:14:39.601 --> 00:14:43.706
  • A woman loose in her morals.
  • 00:14:43.706 --> 00:14:45.507
  • She says, "come, let us drink our fill of love until morning;
  • 00:14:45.507 --> 00:14:49.745
  • Let us delight ourselves and caresses, for my husband is not
  • 00:14:49.745 --> 00:14:53.749
  • At home; he's gone on a long journey.
  • 00:14:53.749 --> 00:14:57.753
  • He has taken a bag of money with him.
  • 00:14:57.753 --> 00:15:00.422
  • And at the full moon he will come home," in other words, he
  • 00:15:00.422 --> 00:15:03.792
  • Won't be home for days, maybe two weeks, "with her many
  • 00:15:03.792 --> 00:15:07.563
  • Persuasions, she entices him; with her flattering lips she
  • 00:15:07.563 --> 00:15:12.468
  • Seduces him.
  • 00:15:12.468 --> 00:15:14.069
  • Suddenly he follows her as an ox goes to the slaughter, or as one
  • 00:15:14.069 --> 00:15:19.608
  • In fetters to the discipline of a fool, until an arrow pierces
  • 00:15:19.608 --> 00:15:24.079
  • Through his liver; as a bird hastens to the snare, so he does
  • 00:15:24.079 --> 00:15:29.118
  • Not know that it will cost him his life."
  • 00:15:29.118 --> 00:15:35.190
  • You know, proverbs 6:27 says, "can a man take fire to his
  • 00:15:35.190 --> 00:15:40.629
  • Bosom and not be burned?"
  • 00:15:40.629 --> 00:15:43.932
  • There are situations, it doesn't matter how spiritual you are,
  • 00:15:43.932 --> 00:15:46.935
  • How much you pray, that are just too hot to handle, and you need
  • 00:15:46.935 --> 00:15:50.706
  • To avoid them.
  • 00:15:50.706 --> 00:15:52.441
  • Let me be real practical here for a moment.
  • 00:15:52.441 --> 00:15:55.611
  • A wise person, man or woman, will avoid eating alone with a
  • 00:15:55.611 --> 00:16:00.382
  • Member of the opposite sex or allowing themselves to be in a
  • 00:16:00.382 --> 00:16:05.020
  • Conversation alone with somebody of the opposite sex because what
  • 00:16:05.020 --> 00:16:09.491
  • Can start out as an innocent conversation can take a wrong
  • 00:16:09.491 --> 00:16:12.728
  • Turn very quickly.
  • 00:16:12.728 --> 00:16:15.597
  • You remember a couple of years ago, i was on tv of fox talking
  • 00:16:15.597 --> 00:16:19.968
  • About this several times.
  • 00:16:19.968 --> 00:16:21.503
  • People were making fun of the vice president, mike pence,
  • 00:16:21.503 --> 00:16:24.907
  • Because of his rule for never dining alone with another woman.
  • 00:16:24.907 --> 00:16:29.211
  • People said, "that's extreme!
  • 00:16:29.211 --> 00:16:30.712
  • That's eccentric!
  • 00:16:30.712 --> 00:16:32.081
  • That's crazy!"
  • 00:16:32.081 --> 00:16:33.415
  • No, that's wisdom, and the bible says if you want to avoid sexual
  • 00:16:33.415 --> 00:16:37.853
  • Regrets, you've got to go the extra mile in abstaining from
  • 00:16:37.853 --> 00:16:42.925
  • Tempting situations.
  • 00:16:42.925 --> 00:16:44.326
  • Finally, and perhaps most importantly, how do you say
  • 00:16:44.326 --> 00:16:47.429
  • Goodbye to regrets about immorality and prevent those
  • 00:16:47.429 --> 00:16:51.200
  • Regrets in the future?
  • 00:16:51.200 --> 00:16:52.701
  • Renew your commitment to marital fidelity.
  • 00:16:52.701 --> 00:16:57.339
  • One thing i love about the bible is it can say in one sentence
  • 00:16:57.339 --> 00:17:00.843
  • What it takes me 30 minutes to say.
  • 00:17:00.843 --> 00:17:03.712
  • Look at what the writer of hebrews said: "marriage is to be
  • 00:17:03.712 --> 00:17:06.515
  • Held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled
  • 00:17:06.515 --> 00:17:11.620
  • For fornicators," that's talking about premarital sex.
  • 00:17:11.620 --> 00:17:14.656
  • That's one way you keep it from being undefiled, but also
  • 00:17:14.656 --> 00:17:17.893
  • Adulterers, immoral sex after marriage.
  • 00:17:17.893 --> 00:17:21.730
  • God will judge that.
  • 00:17:21.730 --> 00:17:25.901
  • "hold marriage as honorable," but you know, in the end, it's
  • 00:17:25.901 --> 00:17:31.473
  • Not a commitment to the institution.
  • 00:17:31.473 --> 00:17:34.943
  • It's not a commitment to an idea.
  • 00:17:34.943 --> 00:17:37.312
  • It's a commitment to that other person that is the bedrock for
  • 00:17:37.312 --> 00:17:43.185
  • Remaining faithful in our marriage.
  • 00:17:43.185 --> 00:17:45.854
  • I don't know about you.
  • 00:17:45.854 --> 00:17:47.456
  • This was a long time ago.
  • 00:17:47.456 --> 00:17:49.625
  • I was in a daze during our wedding.
  • 00:17:49.625 --> 00:17:53.462
  • I don't remember a lot of what i said.
  • 00:17:53.462 --> 00:17:56.665
  • In fact, i remember very well going back and listening to the
  • 00:17:56.665 --> 00:18:00.235
  • Ceremony the next day on cassette tape to see exactly
  • 00:18:00.235 --> 00:18:03.739
  • What i had promised amy and dr. criswell and everybody else what
  • 00:18:03.739 --> 00:18:07.242
  • I had said that day.
  • 00:18:07.242 --> 00:18:09.278
  • But one thing i said, and i bet you said it as well, if you
  • 00:18:09.278 --> 00:18:13.749
  • Got married.
  • 00:18:13.749 --> 00:18:15.384
  • You made the promise to be true to that other person in all
  • 00:18:15.384 --> 00:18:20.923
  • Things until death alone shall part you.
  • 00:18:20.923 --> 00:18:25.460
  • And there's something powerful about renewing that commitment,
  • 00:18:25.460 --> 00:18:29.364
  • Not just yearly, but daily, even hourly.
  • 00:18:29.364 --> 00:18:37.372
  • A number of years ago, i was preaching a message on this
  • 00:18:37.372 --> 00:18:41.376
  • Topic to a group at the glorieta baptist encampment outside of
  • 00:18:41.376 --> 00:18:46.081
  • Albuquerque, and after i finished the message, the host
  • 00:18:46.081 --> 00:18:49.551
  • Introduced me to somebody who had been in the audience, a man
  • 00:18:49.551 --> 00:18:53.188
  • Named robertson mcquilken.
  • 00:18:53.188 --> 00:18:56.658
  • If i had known he was going to be in the audience, i would have
  • 00:18:56.658 --> 00:18:59.428
  • Had him preach the message because he understands marital
  • 00:18:59.428 --> 00:19:03.832
  • Commitment more than anybody i know.
  • 00:19:03.832 --> 00:19:07.569
  • I usually don't like to read long things, but after the
  • 00:19:07.569 --> 00:19:11.773
  • Reaction i got at the first service, i think this is gonna
  • 00:19:11.773 --> 00:19:14.710
  • Speak to some of you.
  • 00:19:14.710 --> 00:19:16.612
  • Listen to what he writes about his own experience with
  • 00:19:16.612 --> 00:19:19.381
  • Commitment with his mate.
  • 00:19:19.381 --> 00:19:23.785
  • "seventeen summers ago, muriel
  • 00:19:23.785 --> 00:19:26.021
  • And i began our journey into the twilight.
  • 00:19:26.021 --> 00:19:29.091
  • It's midnight now, at least for her, and sometimes i wonder when
  • 00:19:29.091 --> 00:19:33.762
  • Dawn will break.
  • 00:19:33.762 --> 00:19:35.497
  • Even the dreaded alzheimer's disease isn't supposed to attack
  • 00:19:35.497 --> 00:19:39.101
  • So early or torment for so long.
  • 00:19:39.101 --> 00:19:42.771
  • Yet in her silent world, muriel is so content, so lovable.
  • 00:19:42.771 --> 00:19:48.710
  • If jesus took her home, how i would miss her gentle,
  • 00:19:48.710 --> 00:19:51.647
  • Sweet presence.
  • 00:19:51.647 --> 00:19:53.582
  • Yes, there are times when i get irritated but not often.
  • 00:19:53.582 --> 00:19:57.552
  • It doesn't make sense to get angry, and perhaps the lord has
  • 00:19:57.552 --> 00:20:01.890
  • Been answering the prayer of my youth to mellow my spirit.
  • 00:20:01.890 --> 00:20:06.395
  • One time though, i completely lost it.
  • 00:20:06.395 --> 00:20:10.232
  • In the days when muriel could still stand and walk and we had
  • 00:20:10.232 --> 00:20:13.468
  • Not yet resorted to diapers, sometimes there were accidents.
  • 00:20:13.468 --> 00:20:18.707
  • I was on my knees beside her trying to clean up the mess as
  • 00:20:18.707 --> 00:20:22.044
  • She stood confused.
  • 00:20:22.044 --> 00:20:24.146
  • It would have been easier if she hadn't been so insistent
  • 00:20:24.146 --> 00:20:26.882
  • On helping.
  • 00:20:26.882 --> 00:20:28.383
  • I got more and more frustrated.
  • 00:20:28.383 --> 00:20:30.652
  • Suddenly, to make her stand still, i slapped her calf, as if
  • 00:20:30.652 --> 00:20:35.524
  • That would do any good.
  • 00:20:35.524 --> 00:20:36.892
  • It wasn't a hard slap, but she was startled.
  • 00:20:36.892 --> 00:20:40.796
  • I was too.
  • 00:20:40.796 --> 00:20:42.364
  • Never in our 44 years of marriage had i ever so much as
  • 00:20:42.364 --> 00:20:45.867
  • Touched her in anger or in rebuke of any kind, never was
  • 00:20:45.867 --> 00:20:49.971
  • Tempted in fact, but now, when she needed me most.
  • 00:20:49.971 --> 00:20:55.277
  • At that very moment, chuck swindoll boomed from the radio
  • 00:20:55.277 --> 00:20:59.081
  • In our kitchen, 'man, are you at home?
  • 00:20:59.081 --> 00:21:02.284
  • Really at home?'
  • 00:21:02.284 --> 00:21:04.386
  • In the midst of my stinking immersion, i smiled,
  • 00:21:04.386 --> 00:21:07.389
  • 'yeah, chuck, i really am at home, and how i wish i weren't.'
  • 00:21:07.389 --> 00:21:13.495
  • Recently, a student's wife, named cindy, asked me, 'don't
  • 00:21:13.495 --> 00:21:17.366
  • You ever get tired?'
  • 00:21:17.366 --> 00:21:19.534
  • 'tired?'
  • 00:21:19.534 --> 00:21:20.869
  • I said, 'every night, that's why i go to bed.'
  • 00:21:20.869 --> 00:21:23.538
  • 'no, i mean tired of,' and she tilted her head
  • 00:21:23.538 --> 00:21:26.842
  • Toward muriel, who sat silently in her wheelchair, her vacant
  • 00:21:26.842 --> 00:21:32.013
  • Eyes saying nobody's at home just now.
  • 00:21:32.013 --> 00:21:36.118
  • I responded to her question, 'why, no.
  • 00:21:36.118 --> 00:21:38.687
  • I don't get tired.
  • 00:21:38.687 --> 00:21:41.790
  • I love her.
  • 00:21:41.790 --> 00:21:43.191
  • She's my precious.'
  • 00:21:43.191 --> 00:21:45.594
  • 'well,' cindy said, 'i certainly would get tired.'
  • 00:21:45.594 --> 00:21:48.463
  • Cindy and her husband are handsome, healthy,
  • 00:21:48.463 --> 00:21:50.766
  • Smart people, yet she admits that it is hard to constantly
  • 00:21:50.766 --> 00:21:55.137
  • Affirm her husband.
  • 00:21:55.137 --> 00:21:57.706
  • What happens when there is so little to commend?
  • 00:21:57.706 --> 00:22:00.475
  • How does love make a difference?
  • 00:22:00.475 --> 00:22:03.645
  • Love is said to evaporate if the relationship is not mutual, if
  • 00:22:03.645 --> 00:22:07.916
  • It's not physical, if the other person doesn't communicate, or
  • 00:22:07.916 --> 00:22:11.987
  • If one party doesn't carry his or her share of the load.
  • 00:22:11.987 --> 00:22:15.957
  • When i hear the litanies of essentials for a happy marriage,
  • 00:22:15.957 --> 00:22:21.496
  • I count off what my beloved can no longer contribute, and i
  • 00:22:21.496 --> 00:22:26.268
  • Contemplate how truly mysterious love is."
  • 00:22:26.268 --> 00:22:32.707
  • Perhaps love is not quite as mysterious as robertson
  • 00:22:32.707 --> 00:22:37.312
  • Mcquilken makes it out to be with the kind of rock-solid
  • 00:22:37.312 --> 00:22:41.850
  • Commitment he demonstrates for his wife.
  • 00:22:41.850 --> 00:22:44.753
  • The chances of that love evaporating are about as great
  • 00:22:44.753 --> 00:22:48.089
  • As the chances of hoover dam being reduced to a mist
  • 00:22:48.089 --> 00:22:54.329
  • And vaporizing.
  • 00:22:54.329 --> 00:22:55.664
  • It's just not going to happen.
  • 00:22:55.664 --> 00:22:58.166
  • And ultimately, it's that kind of rock-solid commitment to your
  • 00:22:58.166 --> 00:23:02.838
  • Mate, the remember of your vows, the love you have for that other
  • 00:23:02.838 --> 00:23:07.442
  • Person that is the best deterrent i know to sexual
  • 00:23:07.442 --> 00:23:13.014
  • Regrets in life.
  • 00:23:13.014 --> 00:23:15.984
  • Jeffress: you might find it unusual to hear a bible teacher
  • 00:23:20.155 --> 00:23:23.225
  • Addressing one of the most intimate facets of our being,
  • 00:23:23.225 --> 00:23:26.928
  • But my hope is that god will use this message to renew your most
  • 00:23:26.928 --> 00:23:31.533
  • Treasured relationship with your mate.
  • 00:23:31.533 --> 00:23:34.703
  • Now, before we wrap up today's message, i have some great news
  • 00:23:34.703 --> 00:23:38.306
  • To share with our "pathway to victory" family.
  • 00:23:38.306 --> 00:23:41.176
  • In recent days, "pathway to victory" has taken on new
  • 00:23:41.176 --> 00:23:43.979
  • Territory for the gospel.
  • 00:23:43.979 --> 00:23:46.014
  • In addition to reaching new cities in north america, we're
  • 00:23:46.014 --> 00:23:49.684
  • Expanding into international regions as well.
  • 00:23:49.684 --> 00:23:53.355
  • In some cases, my sermons are translated into
  • 00:23:53.355 --> 00:23:56.024
  • Foreign languages.
  • 00:23:56.024 --> 00:23:57.559
  • We celebrate these victories because each one represents new
  • 00:23:57.559 --> 00:24:01.930
  • Opportunities to reach even more people with the gospel of jesus
  • 00:24:01.930 --> 00:24:06.368
  • Christ, and each one gives us an even greater platform to bring
  • 00:24:06.368 --> 00:24:10.839
  • Light into the darkness.
  • 00:24:10.839 --> 00:24:13.074
  • So if you're among those who give generously to support
  • 00:24:13.074 --> 00:24:16.311
  • "pathway to victory," i hope this is an encouragement to you.
  • 00:24:16.311 --> 00:24:20.315
  • God is multiplying our ministry together as we pierce the
  • 00:24:20.315 --> 00:24:24.686
  • Darkness with the light of his word.
  • 00:24:24.686 --> 00:24:27.389
  • Now, stay right there.
  • 00:24:27.389 --> 00:24:28.723
  • I'll be back with more "pathway to victory" in just a moment.
  • 00:24:28.723 --> 00:24:32.894
  • Announcer: what if your doctor were to say you had only six
  • 00:24:32.961 --> 00:24:35.697
  • Months left to live?
  • 00:24:35.697 --> 00:24:37.132
  • Would you have any regrets in your life?
  • 00:24:37.132 --> 00:24:39.200
  • In his best selling book, "say goodbye to regret," dr. robert
  • 00:24:39.200 --> 00:24:42.871
  • Jeffress shares biblical principles for dealing with
  • 00:24:42.871 --> 00:24:45.273
  • Regrets from your past and preventing regrets in
  • 00:24:45.273 --> 00:24:47.976
  • The future.
  • 00:24:47.976 --> 00:24:49.311
  • Jeffress: regret is one of life's most painful and
  • 00:24:49.311 --> 00:24:52.213
  • Unnecessary emotions, and in my best selling book, "say goodbye
  • 00:24:52.213 --> 00:24:56.284
  • To regret," i'll help you turn those if-onlys into successful
  • 00:24:56.284 --> 00:25:00.789
  • Lessons in living.
  • 00:25:00.789 --> 00:25:02.524
  • Announcer: it's time to move forward, satisfied with the life
  • 00:25:02.524 --> 00:25:05.694
  • You're living.
  • 00:25:05.694 --> 00:25:07.095
  • Request your copy of "say goodbye to regret" when you give
  • 00:25:07.095 --> 00:25:09.931
  • A generous gift to "pathway to victory."
  • 00:25:09.931 --> 00:25:12.601
  • In the pages of this highly practical book, you'll discover
  • 00:25:12.601 --> 00:25:15.837
  • The biblical keys to leaving behind regrets about
  • 00:25:15.837 --> 00:25:18.607
  • Relationships, your marriage, finances, and more.
  • 00:25:18.607 --> 00:25:22.143
  • And when you give $75 or more, we'll also send you the complete
  • 00:25:22.143 --> 00:25:26.881
  • "say goodbye to regret" teaching series on
  • 00:25:26.881 --> 00:25:29.250
  • Dvd video and mp3 format audio disc.
  • 00:25:29.250 --> 00:25:33.154
  • Jeffress: one of the heaviest weights, other than sin,
  • 00:25:33.154 --> 00:25:36.491
  • Is regret.
  • 00:25:36.491 --> 00:25:37.826
  • Regrets are not the problem in and of themselves, they are an
  • 00:25:37.826 --> 00:25:41.129
  • Indicator of a problem that needs to be dealt with.
  • 00:25:41.129 --> 00:25:45.500
  • Announcer: thank you for helping "pathway to victory"
  • 00:25:45.567 --> 00:25:47.902
  • Proclaim the redemptive power of jesus christ to a world in need.
  • 00:25:47.902 --> 00:25:52.040
  • Together, we are broadcasting the message of god's love
  • 00:25:52.040 --> 00:25:55.243
  • And forgiveness, biblical hope, and life transforming power
  • 00:25:55.243 --> 00:25:58.747
  • Across the country and around the world.
  • 00:25:58.747 --> 00:26:02.484
  • Jeffress: sexual sin may be tempting, but one of the most
  • 00:26:04.886 --> 00:26:08.323
  • Effective safeguards you can employ today is to simply avoid
  • 00:26:08.323 --> 00:26:13.128
  • Tempting situations.
  • 00:26:13.128 --> 00:26:15.230
  • Don't put your personal resolve to the test.
  • 00:26:15.230 --> 00:26:18.867
  • Well, as weeks turned into months and months turn to years,
  • 00:26:18.867 --> 00:26:22.937
  • We're sometimes left wondering where all the time went.
  • 00:26:22.937 --> 00:26:26.274
  • So next time, i'm going to share how to avoid regrets about how
  • 00:26:26.274 --> 00:26:30.645
  • We number our days and spend our time.
  • 00:26:30.645 --> 00:26:33.515
  • Stay tuned for a preview of what's coming up next in our
  • 00:26:33.515 --> 00:26:36.317
  • Series, "say goodbye to regret."
  • 00:26:36.317 --> 00:26:40.455
  • Jeffress: you've got to actually take those plans, those dreams,
  • 00:26:40.455 --> 00:26:44.459
  • And integrate them into your daily schedule.
  • 00:26:44.459 --> 00:26:46.594
  • Your daily schedule ought to be informed by what the big rocks
  • 00:26:46.594 --> 00:26:51.599
  • Are in your life.
  • 00:26:51.599 --> 00:26:52.934
  • Now, realistically, you can't spend 100% of your time working
  • 00:26:52.934 --> 00:26:56.237
  • On your big rocks.
  • 00:26:56.237 --> 00:26:57.806
  • You've got other responsibilities at work and
  • 00:26:57.806 --> 00:27:00.108
  • With your family, but at least 60% of your time ought to be
  • 00:27:00.108 --> 00:27:04.145
  • Spent on what you've identified as the big rocks for your life.
  • 00:27:04.145 --> 00:27:09.350
  • Announcer: set your dvr and join us next time for the message,
  • 00:27:09.350 --> 00:27:12.687
  • "say goodbye to time regrets," here on "pathway to victory."
  • 00:27:12.687 --> 00:27:12.687