Steven Furtick - Is It Good For A Man To Not Have Sexual Relations With A Woman (Part 1)

February 3, 2025 | S25:E33

Discover how to experience sex, marriage, and relationships God's way.

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Steven Furtick | Steven Furtick - Is It Good For A Man To Not Have Sexual Relations With A Woman (Part 1) | February 3, 2025
  • An encouraging message
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  • From pastor steven furtick
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  • Of elevation church.
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  • If you're looking
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  • To strengthen your faith
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  • And shift your perspective,
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  • Stay tuned.
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  • ♪ ♪
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  • >> we're starting
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  • >> we're starting this series today,
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  • This series today, which i have boldly called --
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  • Which i have boldly called -- well, the title is
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  • Well, the title is meant to be,
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  • Meant to be, but the subtitle says
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  • But the subtitle says it's the bibles best kept
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  • It's the bibles best kept secrets about sex, marriage,
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  • Secrets about sex, marriage, and being single.
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  • And being single. and, i say it because
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  • And, i say it because i'm gonna preach
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  • I'm gonna preach from a chapter of scripture
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  • From a chapter of scripture for the next five weeks
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  • For the next five weeks that i haven't heard a lot
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  • That i haven't heard a lot of preachers preach from
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  • Of preachers preach from because it's very bizarre.
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  • Turn in your bible
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  • Turn in your bible to 1 corinthians 7.
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  • To 1 corinthians 7. last week we said goodbye
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  • Last week we said goodbye to jacob in our series,
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  • To jacob in our series, "death to selfie."
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  • "death to selfie." i have been mourning
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  • I have been mourning the loss of jacob all week.
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  • The loss of jacob all week. i enjoyed preaching about him
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  • I enjoyed preaching about him so much and i've been,
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  • Yeah, i've been --
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  • [applause]
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  • Yeah, i've been --
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  • Yeah, i've been -- i've been in mourning
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  • I've been in mourning this week.
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  • This week. just, like, just not even
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  • Just, like, just not even wanting to move on, just --
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  • Wanting to move on, just -- but we gotta go now.
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  • But we gotta go now. and, i like to teach
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  • And, i like to teach and preach in several
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  • And preach in several different styles as well.
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  • Different styles as well. i don't think that you should
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  • I don't think that you should come to church and just be
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  • Come to church and just be addicted to one style
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  • Addicted to one style of ministry,
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  • Of ministry, one style of music,
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  • One style of music, or one style of preaching.
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  • Or one style of preaching. so, i would say our last series
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  • So, i would say our last series was a pretty preachy series,
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  • Was a pretty preachy series, yeah?
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  • Yeah? give you
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  • Give you a lot of opportunities
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  • A lot of opportunities to get up on your feet
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  • To get up on your feet and respond to god's word.
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  • And respond to god's word. i wanna teach a little bit over
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  • I wanna teach a little bit over the next five weeks and just
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  • The next five weeks and just get into this one chapter
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  • Get into this one chapter of scripture
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  • Of scripture and just take it
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  • And just take it verse by verse and see what
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  • Verse by verse and see what god has to say to us about
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  • God has to say to us about the relationships in our lives.
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  • The relationships in our lives. i wanted to do it in a way
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  • I wanted to do it in a way that would feel fresh
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  • That would feel fresh and so i haven't divided up
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  • And so i haven't divided up each week into
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  • Each week into this is the week for
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  • This is the week for the single people and this is
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  • The single people and this is the week for the married people
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  • The week for the married people and this is the week --
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  • And this is the week -- i didn't wanna do that
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  • I didn't wanna do that because it's so predictable
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  • Because it's so predictable and so i'm gonna let
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  • And so i'm gonna let the scripture be our guide,
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  • The scripture be our guide, which is probably a good idea
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  • Which is probably a good idea anyway rather than me
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  • Anyway rather than me dividing up my opinions
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  • Dividing up my opinions of what i think you
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  • Of what i think you need to hear about.
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  • Need to hear about. just let the text set
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  • Just let the text set the trajectory of the series
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  • The trajectory of the series and so, whereas in our
  • 00:02:01.551 --> 00:02:02.852
  • And so, whereas in our last series we covered,
  • 00:02:02.919 --> 00:02:04.354
  • Last series we covered, i think 12 chapters
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  • I think 12 chapters of scripture give or take,
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  • Of scripture give or take, we're only going to stay on one
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  • We're only going to stay on one for this five-week series
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  • For this five-week series and just take these verses
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  • And just take these verses and see what god
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  • And see what god would say to us today.
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  • Would say to us today. and, i know it'll speak to your
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  • And, i know it'll speak to your situation wherever you are.
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  • Situation wherever you are. he has the ability to do that
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  • He has the ability to do that and only he can.
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  • And only he can. i mean, this is a
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  • I mean, this is a supernatural thing
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  • Supernatural thing that we could have people
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  • That we could have people in the room who are on
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  • In the room who are on their fourth marriage
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  • Their fourth marriage and people in the room
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  • And people in the room who are 14 years old
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  • Who are 14 years old and god can, through his word,
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  • And god can, through his word, just divide it and get you
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  • Just divide it and get you the portion that you need
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  • The portion that you need and the way you need
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  • And the way you need to hear and we're praying
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  • To hear and we're praying that he would do that
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  • That he would do that and we just,
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  • And we just, we're believing for some
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  • We're believing for some really great things
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  • Really great things in this series.
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  • In this series. let's get to it.
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  • Let's get to it. i'm taking up all my time
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  • I'm taking up all my time in introductory remarks
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  • In introductory remarks and i've got a lot
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  • And i've got a lot to say to you.
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  • To say to you. god's put a lot on my heart.
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  • God's put a lot on my heart. 1 corinthians 7:1-7.
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  • 1 corinthians 7:1-7. i'll read it really fast
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  • I'll read it really fast and then i'll back up
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  • And then i'll back up and take it apart
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  • And take it apart a little bit this week.
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  • A little bit this week. you'll need to come
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  • You'll need to come several weeks of this series
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  • Several weeks of this series or you're going to get
  • 00:02:57.874 --> 00:02:58.741
  • Or you're going to get an imbalanced view
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  • An imbalanced view of what we're trying to say.
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  • Of what we're trying to say. i cannot possibly address
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  • I cannot possibly address everything in the opening week.
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  • Everything in the opening week. so, you're gonna have to take
  • 00:03:05.548 --> 00:03:07.116
  • So, you're gonna have to take some initiative for this
  • 00:03:07.183 --> 00:03:08.184
  • Some initiative for this to really make a difference
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  • To really make a difference in your life and we believe
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  • In your life and we believe that it will.
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  • 1 corinthians 7:1-7,
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  • 1 corinthians 7:1-7, "paul says,
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  • "paul says, 'now for the matters
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  • 'now for the matters you wrote about,
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  • You wrote about, it is good for a man
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  • It is good for a man not to have sexual relations
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  • Not to have sexual relations with a woman but since
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  • With a woman but since sexual immorality is occurring,
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  • Sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have
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  • Each man should have sexual relations with
  • 00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:25.068
  • Sexual relations with his own wife and each woman
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  • His own wife and each woman with her own husband.
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  • With her own husband. the husband should fulfill
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  • The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife
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  • His marital duty to his wife and likewise the wife
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  • And likewise the wife to her husband.
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  • To her husband. the wife does not have
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  • The wife does not have authority over her own body
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  • Authority over her own body but yields it to her husband
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  • But yields it to her husband in the same way
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  • In the same way the husband does not have
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  • The husband does not have authority over his own body
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  • Authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.
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  • But yields it to his wife. do not deprive each other
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  • Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent
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  • Except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time so that you may
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  • And for a time so that you may devote yourselves to prayer.
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  • Devote yourselves to prayer. then come together again so that
  • 00:03:48.591 --> 00:03:50.760
  • Then come together again so that satan will not temp you because
  • 00:03:50.827 --> 00:03:52.795
  • Satan will not temp you because of your lack of self-control.
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  • Of your lack of self-control. i say this as a concession,
  • 00:03:54.597 --> 00:03:56.165
  • I say this as a concession, not as a command.
  • 00:03:56.232 --> 00:03:57.033
  • Not as a command. i wish that all of you were
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  • I wish that all of you were as i am but each of you
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  • As i am but each of you has your own gift from god.
  • 00:04:00.003 --> 00:04:01.604
  • Has your own gift from god. one has this gift,
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  • One has this gift, another has that.'"
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  • Another has that.'" let's go back to verse one
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  • Let's go back to verse one to begin our study today
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  • To begin our study today where paul says,
  • 00:04:07.877 --> 00:04:08.778
  • Where paul says, "now, for the matters
  • 00:04:08.845 --> 00:04:09.545
  • "now, for the matters you wrote about,
  • 00:04:09.612 --> 00:04:10.513
  • You wrote about, it is good for a man
  • 00:04:10.580 --> 00:04:12.849
  • It is good for a man not to have sexual relations
  • 00:04:12.915 --> 00:04:15.318
  • Not to have sexual relations with a woman."
  • 00:04:15.385 --> 00:04:16.052
  • With a woman." the title of my message today,
  • 00:04:16.119 --> 00:04:18.187
  • Appropriately i think is,
  • 00:04:18.288 --> 00:04:19.522
  • Appropriately i think is, "it is good for a man
  • 00:04:19.589 --> 00:04:21.424
  • "it is good for a man not to have sexual relations
  • 00:04:21.491 --> 00:04:23.826
  • Not to have sexual relations with a woman."
  • 00:04:23.893 --> 00:04:24.627
  • With a woman." if you're looking for a title
  • 00:04:24.694 --> 00:04:25.528
  • If you're looking for a title to put on top of your
  • 00:04:25.595 --> 00:04:27.096
  • To put on top of your worship guide there,
  • 00:04:27.163 --> 00:04:28.064
  • Worship guide there, this is the title.
  • 00:04:28.131 --> 00:04:29.699
  • This is the title. usually they're catchier
  • 00:04:29.766 --> 00:04:30.433
  • Usually they're catchier and a little punchier
  • 00:04:30.500 --> 00:04:31.467
  • And a little punchier but this week,
  • 00:04:31.534 --> 00:04:32.168
  • But this week, we're just going to go with
  • 00:04:32.235 --> 00:04:33.269
  • We're just going to go with exactly what paul said
  • 00:04:33.336 --> 00:04:33.903
  • Exactly what paul said in the text
  • 00:04:33.970 --> 00:04:34.737
  • In the text and we're gonna talk about
  • 00:04:34.804 --> 00:04:35.605
  • And we're gonna talk about it is good for a man
  • 00:04:35.672 --> 00:04:37.840
  • It is good for a man not to have sexual relations
  • 00:04:37.907 --> 00:04:39.876
  • Not to have sexual relations with a woman.
  • 00:04:39.942 --> 00:04:40.510
  • With a woman. how many of you agree
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  • How many of you agree with the apostle paul
  • 00:04:41.411 --> 00:04:42.512
  • With the apostle paul here on this point,
  • 00:04:42.578 --> 00:04:43.112
  • Here on this point, that it is good for a man
  • 00:04:43.179 --> 00:04:46.082
  • That it is good for a man not to have sexual relations
  • 00:04:46.149 --> 00:04:49.185
  • Not to have sexual relations with a woman?
  • 00:04:49.252 --> 00:04:50.453
  • With a woman? if you're uncomfortable
  • 00:04:50.520 --> 00:04:51.054
  • If you're uncomfortable already at this point
  • 00:04:51.120 --> 00:04:51.954
  • Already at this point in the sermon you should
  • 00:04:52.021 --> 00:04:52.789
  • In the sermon you should definitely go to ekidz,
  • 00:04:52.855 --> 00:04:53.790
  • Definitely go to ekidz, i'm sure they'd make
  • 00:04:53.856 --> 00:04:54.357
  • I'm sure they'd make an exception for you as well.
  • 00:04:54.424 --> 00:04:57.060
  • An exception for you as well. it's gonna get a lot more
  • 00:04:57.126 --> 00:04:59.929
  • It's gonna get a lot more awkward than this and i know
  • 00:04:59.996 --> 00:05:02.532
  • Awkward than this and i know there's a guy that is
  • 00:05:02.598 --> 00:05:04.300
  • There's a guy that is looking at the title
  • 00:05:04.367 --> 00:05:05.702
  • Looking at the title of my sermon today saying,
  • 00:05:05.768 --> 00:05:07.370
  • Of my sermon today saying, "oh, crap, i hate this church,"
  • 00:05:07.437 --> 00:05:08.905
  • "oh, crap, i hate this church," because this is the way
  • 00:05:08.971 --> 00:05:10.340
  • Because this is the way you've always viewed church
  • 00:05:10.406 --> 00:05:11.341
  • You've always viewed church when it comes to matters
  • 00:05:11.407 --> 00:05:12.275
  • When it comes to matters of sexuality.
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  • Of sexuality. it's like, you know,
  • 00:05:13.242 --> 00:05:14.310
  • It's like, you know, paul is actually single
  • 00:05:14.377 --> 00:05:15.378
  • Paul is actually single when he's writing this,
  • 00:05:15.445 --> 00:05:16.646
  • When he's writing this, most scholars believe
  • 00:05:16.713 --> 00:05:18.081
  • Most scholars believe that he had a wife
  • 00:05:18.147 --> 00:05:19.182
  • That he had a wife at one point but she died.
  • 00:05:19.248 --> 00:05:20.316
  • At one point but she died. because to have a position
  • 00:05:20.383 --> 00:05:21.751
  • Because to have a position like he had in hebrew culture,
  • 00:05:21.818 --> 00:05:24.354
  • Like he had in hebrew culture, in jewish culture,
  • 00:05:24.420 --> 00:05:25.621
  • In jewish culture, he would have had a wife.
  • 00:05:25.688 --> 00:05:27.056
  • He would have had a wife. he would have been required
  • 00:05:27.123 --> 00:05:27.857
  • He would have been required to have a wife but he doesn't
  • 00:05:27.924 --> 00:05:29.625
  • To have a wife but he doesn't have a wife anymore,
  • 00:05:29.692 --> 00:05:30.626
  • Have a wife anymore, we find out in the chapter,
  • 00:05:30.693 --> 00:05:31.461
  • We find out in the chapter, and she probably has died
  • 00:05:31.527 --> 00:05:33.262
  • And she probably has died because he would have not been
  • 00:05:33.329 --> 00:05:34.297
  • Because he would have not been permitted to divorce
  • 00:05:34.364 --> 00:05:35.198
  • Permitted to divorce and then keep his position.
  • 00:05:35.264 --> 00:05:36.199
  • And then keep his position. so, he probably had a wife
  • 00:05:36.265 --> 00:05:37.066
  • So, he probably had a wife and she died
  • 00:05:37.133 --> 00:05:37.867
  • And she died but now he's saying it is
  • 00:05:37.934 --> 00:05:38.801
  • But now he's saying it is good for man to not have
  • 00:05:38.868 --> 00:05:41.104
  • Good for man to not have sexual relations with a woman.
  • 00:05:41.170 --> 00:05:44.040
  • Sexual relations with a woman. and, part of us thinks,
  • 00:05:44.107 --> 00:05:45.274
  • And, part of us thinks, you know,
  • 00:05:45.341 --> 00:05:45.842
  • You know, "well, oh, is paul like
  • 00:05:45.908 --> 00:05:46.542
  • "well, oh, is paul like the guy who because he isn't,
  • 00:05:46.609 --> 00:05:48.244
  • The guy who because he isn't, you know, getting any,
  • 00:05:48.311 --> 00:05:50.813
  • You know, getting any, we're not allowed to either?"
  • 00:05:50.880 --> 00:05:52.215
  • We're not allowed to either?" which is how the church
  • 00:05:52.281 --> 00:05:52.882
  • Which is how the church is often seen.
  • 00:05:52.949 --> 00:05:53.516
  • Is often seen. like, you guys don't
  • 00:05:53.583 --> 00:05:54.250
  • Like, you guys don't have any sex so,
  • 00:05:54.317 --> 00:05:56.185
  • You spend all your time
  • 00:05:56.285 --> 00:05:56.886
  • You spend all your time trying to keep all the rest
  • 00:05:56.953 --> 00:05:57.620
  • Trying to keep all the rest of us from having sex as well.
  • 00:05:57.687 --> 00:05:59.255
  • Of us from having sex as well. and, there's a tendency to think
  • 00:05:59.322 --> 00:06:01.691
  • And, there's a tendency to think that that's what paul
  • 00:06:01.758 --> 00:06:02.558
  • That that's what paul is doing here,
  • 00:06:02.625 --> 00:06:03.359
  • Is doing here, but in order to understand
  • 00:06:03.426 --> 00:06:04.927
  • But in order to understand the text, you do have
  • 00:06:04.994 --> 00:06:06.095
  • The text, you do have to understand the context,
  • 00:06:06.162 --> 00:06:07.663
  • To understand the context, and it's always
  • 00:06:07.730 --> 00:06:08.664
  • And it's always an important thing.
  • 00:06:08.731 --> 00:06:09.499
  • An important thing. so, i wanna walk you
  • 00:06:09.565 --> 00:06:10.800
  • Through this.
  • 00:06:10.900 --> 00:06:11.200
  • Through this. now, i won't take long,
  • 00:06:11.267 --> 00:06:12.135
  • Now, i won't take long, i'm just introducing the topic
  • 00:06:12.201 --> 00:06:13.403
  • I'm just introducing the topic this week and we'll get more
  • 00:06:13.469 --> 00:06:14.771
  • This week and we'll get more in depth in the coming weeks.
  • 00:06:14.837 --> 00:06:16.205
  • In depth in the coming weeks. but i just wanna have
  • 00:06:16.272 --> 00:06:16.839
  • But i just wanna have a conversation and open
  • 00:06:16.906 --> 00:06:17.707
  • A conversation and open the conversation with you
  • 00:06:17.774 --> 00:06:19.275
  • The conversation with you from this chapter of scripture
  • 00:06:19.342 --> 00:06:21.577
  • From this chapter of scripture that was originally part
  • 00:06:21.644 --> 00:06:23.146
  • That was originally part of a letter that paul wrote
  • 00:06:23.212 --> 00:06:25.181
  • Of a letter that paul wrote to a church at corinth
  • 00:06:25.248 --> 00:06:26.883
  • To a church at corinth that was experiencing
  • 00:06:26.949 --> 00:06:27.917
  • That was experiencing great division and dysfunction.
  • 00:06:27.984 --> 00:06:30.119
  • Great division and dysfunction. and paul, like a good pastor,
  • 00:06:30.186 --> 00:06:32.388
  • And paul, like a good pastor, is taking the questions
  • 00:06:32.455 --> 00:06:34.090
  • Is taking the questions of the people in the culture
  • 00:06:34.157 --> 00:06:36.159
  • Of the people in the culture of their day with
  • 00:06:36.225 --> 00:06:37.260
  • Of their day with the complications
  • 00:06:37.326 --> 00:06:38.327
  • The complications they were facing
  • 00:06:38.394 --> 00:06:39.395
  • They were facing and he's speaking into culture.
  • 00:06:39.462 --> 00:06:42.265
  • And he's speaking into culture. the first thing,
  • 00:06:42.331 --> 00:06:43.766
  • The first thing, i have four of these
  • 00:06:43.833 --> 00:06:44.834
  • I have four of these that we wanna talk about today
  • 00:06:44.901 --> 00:06:46.369
  • That we wanna talk about today is the tension between
  • 00:06:46.436 --> 00:06:47.570
  • Is the tension between questions and issues.
  • 00:06:47.637 --> 00:06:50.206
  • Questions and issues. the tension between
  • 00:06:50.273 --> 00:06:50.873
  • The tension between questions and issues.
  • 00:06:50.940 --> 00:06:54.377
  • Questions and issues. see, if you notice here in
  • 00:06:54.444 --> 00:06:55.845
  • The first verse of this chapter,
  • 00:06:55.945 --> 00:06:59.449
  • The first verse of this chapter, before paul says it is good
  • 00:06:59.515 --> 00:07:00.883
  • Before paul says it is good for a man not to have
  • 00:07:00.950 --> 00:07:01.884
  • For a man not to have sexual relations with a woman,
  • 00:07:01.951 --> 00:07:03.553
  • Sexual relations with a woman, he says in his
  • 00:07:03.619 --> 00:07:04.420
  • He says in his introductory phrase,
  • 00:07:04.487 --> 00:07:05.455
  • Introductory phrase, "now, for the matters
  • 00:07:05.521 --> 00:07:07.323
  • "now, for the matters you wrote about."
  • 00:07:07.390 --> 00:07:08.691
  • You wrote about." so, apparently,
  • 00:07:08.758 --> 00:07:09.859
  • The corinthian church had
  • 00:07:09.959 --> 00:07:10.793
  • The corinthian church had put together a list of questions
  • 00:07:10.860 --> 00:07:12.628
  • Put together a list of questions for the great apostle paul
  • 00:07:12.695 --> 00:07:14.597
  • For the great apostle paul and they asked him questions,
  • 00:07:14.664 --> 00:07:16.766
  • And they asked him questions, you know, a list of questions.
  • 00:07:16.833 --> 00:07:18.568
  • You know, a list of questions. "hey, paul, here's what
  • 00:07:18.634 --> 00:07:19.769
  • "hey, paul, here's what we need to know about.
  • 00:07:19.836 --> 00:07:21.237
  • We need to know about. here's what we're dealing with."
  • 00:07:21.304 --> 00:07:22.638
  • Here's what we're dealing with." and in this list you're about
  • 00:07:22.705 --> 00:07:23.940
  • And in this list you're about to see paul answer many
  • 00:07:24.006 --> 00:07:25.541
  • To see paul answer many of their questions
  • 00:07:25.608 --> 00:07:26.242
  • Of their questions in 1 corinthians 7 like,
  • 00:07:26.309 --> 00:07:28.911
  • In 1 corinthians 7 like, what about widows
  • 00:07:28.978 --> 00:07:29.812
  • What about widows and what about people
  • 00:07:29.879 --> 00:07:30.947
  • And what about people who have been divorced?
  • 00:07:31.013 --> 00:07:31.747
  • Who have been divorced? and okay, if you choose to be
  • 00:07:31.814 --> 00:07:33.749
  • And okay, if you choose to be celibate is that okay?
  • 00:07:33.816 --> 00:07:35.017
  • Celibate is that okay? are people who chose to be
  • 00:07:35.084 --> 00:07:37.086
  • Are people who chose to be single more spiritual than
  • 00:07:37.153 --> 00:07:38.354
  • Single more spiritual than people who chose to be married?
  • 00:07:38.421 --> 00:07:39.655
  • And on and on.
  • 00:07:39.755 --> 00:07:40.890
  • And on and on. and, he's about to answer their
  • 00:07:40.957 --> 00:07:41.958
  • And, he's about to answer their questions but i wanna point out
  • 00:07:42.024 --> 00:07:43.292
  • Questions but i wanna point out the fact that it's been
  • 00:07:43.359 --> 00:07:45.394
  • The fact that it's been six chapters and he's just
  • 00:07:45.461 --> 00:07:47.096
  • Six chapters and he's just now getting around
  • 00:07:47.163 --> 00:07:48.130
  • Now getting around to answering their questions.
  • 00:07:48.197 --> 00:07:50.433
  • To answering their questions. here's why, because often
  • 00:07:50.500 --> 00:07:51.934
  • Here's why, because often there's a difference between
  • 00:07:52.001 --> 00:07:53.202
  • There's a difference between the questions that we ask
  • 00:07:53.269 --> 00:07:54.403
  • The questions that we ask and the real issues
  • 00:07:54.470 --> 00:07:55.471
  • And the real issues that we're dealing with,
  • 00:07:55.538 --> 00:07:57.773
  • That we're dealing with, and god is not nearly
  • 00:07:57.840 --> 00:07:58.908
  • As concerned with answering
  • 00:07:59.008 --> 00:08:00.109
  • As concerned with answering our questions as he is with
  • 00:08:00.176 --> 00:08:01.777
  • Our questions as he is with dealing with our real issues.
  • 00:08:01.844 --> 00:08:05.481
  • Dealing with our real issues. and so, paul,
  • 00:08:05.548 --> 00:08:06.516
  • And so, paul, paul does something really,
  • 00:08:06.582 --> 00:08:07.683
  • Paul does something really, really unique, he goes through
  • 00:08:07.750 --> 00:08:09.118
  • Really unique, he goes through six chapters where he doesn't
  • 00:08:09.185 --> 00:08:11.087
  • Six chapters where he doesn't even mention their questions
  • 00:08:11.153 --> 00:08:14.323
  • Even mention their questions and he tells them the answers
  • 00:08:14.390 --> 00:08:16.526
  • And he tells them the answers to the questions that
  • 00:08:16.592 --> 00:08:17.293
  • To the questions that they should be asking.
  • 00:08:17.360 --> 00:08:18.528
  • They should be asking. like, check this out,
  • 00:08:18.594 --> 00:08:19.295
  • Like, check this out, in chapter five,
  • 00:08:19.362 --> 00:08:20.963
  • 1 corinthians 5,
  • 00:08:21.063 --> 00:08:22.231
  • 1 corinthians 5, here's one, he says,
  • 00:08:22.298 --> 00:08:23.299
  • Here's one, he says, "hey, it's actually reported,
  • 00:08:23.366 --> 00:08:25.167
  • "hey, it's actually reported, like i heard this report,
  • 00:08:25.234 --> 00:08:26.702
  • Like i heard this report, that there is sexual immorality
  • 00:08:26.769 --> 00:08:27.870
  • That there is sexual immorality among you and of a kind
  • 00:08:27.937 --> 00:08:29.405
  • Among you and of a kind that not even pagans
  • 00:08:29.472 --> 00:08:30.673
  • That not even pagans will put up with.
  • 00:08:30.740 --> 00:08:31.607
  • Will put up with. like, people who don't even
  • 00:08:31.674 --> 00:08:32.341
  • Like, people who don't even know god don't do this.
  • 00:08:32.408 --> 00:08:33.743
  • Know god don't do this. you've got a man in your church
  • 00:08:33.809 --> 00:08:35.077
  • You've got a man in your church who's sleeping with
  • 00:08:35.144 --> 00:08:35.811
  • Who's sleeping with his father's wife."
  • 00:08:35.878 --> 00:08:37.980
  • His father's wife." so, paul addresses that
  • 00:08:38.047 --> 00:08:38.915
  • So, paul addresses that issue in chapter five.
  • 00:08:38.981 --> 00:08:41.250
  • Issue in chapter five. then in chapter six,
  • 00:08:41.317 --> 00:08:43.019
  • Then in chapter six, he gets to another issue,
  • 00:08:43.085 --> 00:08:44.453
  • He gets to another issue, he says,
  • 00:08:44.520 --> 00:08:45.087
  • He says, "hey, do you not know
  • 00:08:45.154 --> 00:08:46.222
  • "hey, do you not know that your bodies are members
  • 00:08:46.289 --> 00:08:47.423
  • That your bodies are members of christ themselves?
  • 00:08:47.490 --> 00:08:48.424
  • Of christ themselves? shall i then take
  • 00:08:48.491 --> 00:08:49.058
  • Shall i then take the members of christ
  • 00:08:49.125 --> 00:08:49.959
  • The members of christ and unite them
  • 00:08:50.026 --> 00:08:50.860
  • And unite them with a prostitute?"
  • 00:08:50.927 --> 00:08:51.594
  • With a prostitute?" so, there's widespread
  • 00:08:51.661 --> 00:08:52.862
  • So, there's widespread prostitution rings in corinth
  • 00:08:52.929 --> 00:08:55.765
  • And paul finds out that some
  • 00:08:55.865 --> 00:08:56.899
  • And paul finds out that some of the church members are going
  • 00:08:56.966 --> 00:08:58.935
  • Of the church members are going and doing this on the side.
  • 00:08:59.001 --> 00:09:00.803
  • And doing this on the side. now, they didn't put that
  • 00:09:00.870 --> 00:09:01.737
  • Now, they didn't put that in their list of questions
  • 00:09:01.804 --> 00:09:02.905
  • In their list of questions that they sent to paul,
  • 00:09:02.972 --> 00:09:04.206
  • That they sent to paul, but paul knew about it.
  • 00:09:04.273 --> 00:09:06.008
  • But paul knew about it. so, he spends the first
  • 00:09:06.075 --> 00:09:07.009
  • So, he spends the first six chapters saying, like,
  • 00:09:07.076 --> 00:09:08.377
  • Six chapters saying, like, "hey, i know there's incest
  • 00:09:08.444 --> 00:09:10.012
  • "hey, i know there's incest in the church, stop that!
  • 00:09:10.079 --> 00:09:13.716
  • In the church, stop that! hey, i heard some of you are
  • 00:09:13.783 --> 00:09:14.951
  • Hey, i heard some of you are going to hookers, cut it out!
  • 00:09:15.017 --> 00:09:18.020
  • Going to hookers, cut it out! now, for the questions
  • 00:09:18.087 --> 00:09:19.722
  • Now, for the questions you wrote to me about."
  • 00:09:19.789 --> 00:09:20.823
  • [laughter]
  • 00:09:21.290 --> 00:09:23.559
  • Sometimes the questions that
  • 00:09:24.160 --> 00:09:25.394
  • Sometimes the questions that we ask are not the questions
  • 00:09:25.461 --> 00:09:27.263
  • We ask are not the questions that we're really living.
  • 00:09:27.330 --> 00:09:29.932
  • That we're really living. sometimes the questions that
  • 00:09:29.999 --> 00:09:31.467
  • Sometimes the questions that we ask don't really indicate
  • 00:09:31.534 --> 00:09:34.904
  • We ask don't really indicate the depth of the issues
  • 00:09:34.971 --> 00:09:35.805
  • The depth of the issues that we really face.
  • 00:09:35.871 --> 00:09:39.041
  • That we really face. we have three children, right,
  • 00:09:39.108 --> 00:09:40.710
  • We have three children, right, three children.
  • 00:09:40.776 --> 00:09:41.944
  • Three children. and...
  • 00:09:42.011 --> 00:09:42.545
  • [laughter]
  • 00:09:42.845 --> 00:09:43.112
  • Yeah, three children
  • 00:09:43.613 --> 00:09:44.847
  • Yeah, three children and it will probably
  • 00:09:44.914 --> 00:09:45.781
  • And it will probably stay right there.
  • 00:09:45.848 --> 00:09:48.484
  • Stay right there. holly will look
  • 00:09:48.551 --> 00:09:49.051
  • Holly will look at me many times,
  • 00:09:49.118 --> 00:09:49.885
  • At me many times, this has happened many times,
  • 00:09:49.952 --> 00:09:51.020
  • This has happened many times, especially in the last year
  • 00:09:51.087 --> 00:09:52.288
  • Especially in the last year and she'll ask me a simple
  • 00:09:52.355 --> 00:09:53.623
  • And she'll ask me a simple question when the kids are
  • 00:09:53.689 --> 00:09:54.624
  • Question when the kids are perhaps out of hand she'll say,
  • 00:09:54.690 --> 00:09:56.726
  • Perhaps out of hand she'll say, "do you need me to make you an
  • 00:09:56.792 --> 00:09:57.760
  • "do you need me to make you an appointment or are you going
  • 00:09:57.827 --> 00:09:59.495
  • Appointment or are you going to make the appointment?"
  • 00:09:59.562 --> 00:10:00.229
  • To make the appointment?" in other words...
  • 00:10:00.296 --> 00:10:00.630
  • [laughter]
  • 00:10:00.830 --> 00:10:01.397
  • Three is good.
  • 00:10:01.797 --> 00:10:02.865
  • Three is good. and so, that's where we're at
  • 00:10:02.932 --> 00:10:04.667
  • And so, that's where we're at in our family planning.
  • 00:10:04.734 --> 00:10:05.735
  • In our family planning. and so...
  • 00:10:05.801 --> 00:10:06.469
  • [laughter]
  • 00:10:06.902 --> 00:10:07.870
  • So...
  • 00:10:08.204 --> 00:10:09.538
  • So...
  • 00:10:09.972 --> 00:10:10.172
  • [laughter]
  • 00:10:10.806 --> 00:10:11.340
  • So, when we had our
  • 00:10:11.774 --> 00:10:12.475
  • So, when we had our little girl because
  • 00:10:12.541 --> 00:10:13.442
  • Little girl because our two boys are older
  • 00:10:13.509 --> 00:10:14.443
  • Our two boys are older and our little girl
  • 00:10:14.510 --> 00:10:15.244
  • And our little girl is three and everybody
  • 00:10:15.311 --> 00:10:16.245
  • Is three and everybody would tell me,
  • 00:10:16.312 --> 00:10:16.612
  • Would tell me, "oh, it's different with girls,
  • 00:10:16.679 --> 00:10:17.580
  • "oh, it's different with girls, it's different with girls,
  • 00:10:17.647 --> 00:10:18.280
  • It's different with girls, it's different with girls,
  • 00:10:18.347 --> 00:10:18.848
  • It's different with girls, it's different with girls."
  • 00:10:18.914 --> 00:10:20.383
  • It's different with girls." i'm sure i do not understand
  • 00:10:20.449 --> 00:10:21.484
  • I'm sure i do not understand the full extent
  • 00:10:21.550 --> 00:10:22.618
  • The full extent of that claim yet
  • 00:10:22.685 --> 00:10:23.819
  • Of that claim yet and i won't for some time.
  • 00:10:23.886 --> 00:10:24.920
  • And i won't for some time. i did, however, happen to walk
  • 00:10:24.987 --> 00:10:26.222
  • I did, however, happen to walk by my daughter on the way out
  • 00:10:26.288 --> 00:10:27.390
  • By my daughter on the way out to preach today and guess
  • 00:10:27.456 --> 00:10:28.457
  • To preach today and guess what she was doing?
  • 00:10:28.524 --> 00:10:29.325
  • What she was doing? she was looking at
  • 00:10:29.392 --> 00:10:30.559
  • She was looking at pictures of wedding dresses
  • 00:10:30.626 --> 00:10:32.261
  • Pictures of wedding dresses on an iphone.
  • 00:10:32.328 --> 00:10:33.462
  • On an iphone. she is three.
  • 00:10:33.529 --> 00:10:34.730
  • She is three. one of our staff members,
  • 00:10:34.797 --> 00:10:35.965
  • One of our staff members, named caroline,
  • 00:10:36.032 --> 00:10:36.932
  • Named caroline, who was getting married,
  • 00:10:36.999 --> 00:10:37.700
  • Who was getting married, was showing my daughter
  • 00:10:37.767 --> 00:10:39.235
  • Pictures of wedding dresses.
  • 00:10:39.335 --> 00:10:40.803
  • Pictures of wedding dresses. first, i fired caroline,
  • 00:10:40.870 --> 00:10:42.238
  • First, i fired caroline, and second i told abby,
  • 00:10:42.304 --> 00:10:43.739
  • And second i told abby, "put the phone down,
  • 00:10:43.806 --> 00:10:44.707
  • "put the phone down, step away from the phone,
  • 00:10:44.774 --> 00:10:45.941
  • Step away from the phone, this is ridiculous."
  • 00:10:46.008 --> 00:10:46.976
  • This is ridiculous." and that's just one
  • 00:10:47.043 --> 00:10:47.543
  • And that's just one of the many differences.
  • 00:10:47.610 --> 00:10:48.444
  • Of the many differences. i've never seen elijah
  • 00:10:48.511 --> 00:10:49.578
  • I've never seen elijah look at wedding dresses
  • 00:10:49.645 --> 00:10:50.746
  • Look at wedding dresses on an iphone, never.
  • 00:10:50.813 --> 00:10:53.249
  • Never.
  • 00:10:53.349 --> 00:10:56.285
  • Never. but, one of the things
  • 00:10:56.352 --> 00:10:57.420
  • But, one of the things i have noticed and this is
  • 00:10:57.486 --> 00:10:58.921
  • I have noticed and this is probably the most evident way
  • 00:10:58.988 --> 00:11:00.489
  • Probably the most evident way that it is different even
  • 00:11:00.556 --> 00:11:01.390
  • That it is different even with abby only being three,
  • 00:11:01.457 --> 00:11:04.527
  • With abby only being three, is not in just the types
  • 00:11:04.593 --> 00:11:05.661
  • Is not in just the types of things that she wants
  • 00:11:05.728 --> 00:11:07.663
  • Of things that she wants to talk about but the amount
  • 00:11:07.730 --> 00:11:09.265
  • To talk about but the amount that she wants to talk about,
  • 00:11:09.331 --> 00:11:11.000
  • That she wants to talk about, everything, which i thought was
  • 00:11:11.067 --> 00:11:13.469
  • Everything, which i thought was a trait unique to holly.
  • 00:11:13.536 --> 00:11:14.704
  • A trait unique to holly. you know, it shocked me when
  • 00:11:14.770 --> 00:11:16.172
  • You know, it shocked me when we first got married and i have
  • 00:11:16.238 --> 00:11:18.574
  • We first got married and i have a very blessed marriage, okay?
  • 00:11:18.641 --> 00:11:20.076
  • A very blessed marriage, okay? and i don't mind sharing
  • 00:11:20.142 --> 00:11:20.876
  • And i don't mind sharing with you about how
  • 00:11:20.943 --> 00:11:21.977
  • With you about how our marriage is blessed.
  • 00:11:22.044 --> 00:11:24.080
  • Our marriage is blessed. when i used to do
  • 00:11:24.146 --> 00:11:24.780
  • When i used to do a relationship series,
  • 00:11:24.847 --> 00:11:25.815
  • A relationship series, i would start with a preface,
  • 00:11:25.881 --> 00:11:27.416
  • I would start with a preface, "hey, you know, we've only
  • 00:11:27.483 --> 00:11:28.317
  • "hey, you know, we've only been married for a couple
  • 00:11:28.384 --> 00:11:29.585
  • Been married for a couple of years and i know as many
  • 00:11:29.652 --> 00:11:31.087
  • Of years and i know as many of you have been
  • 00:11:31.153 --> 00:11:32.021
  • Of you have been married a lot longer
  • 00:11:32.088 --> 00:11:32.588
  • Married a lot longer and i don't have a right
  • 00:11:32.655 --> 00:11:33.355
  • And i don't have a right to tell you about marriage."
  • 00:11:33.422 --> 00:11:34.824
  • To tell you about marriage." but i realized in this series,
  • 00:11:34.890 --> 00:11:36.492
  • But i realized in this series, i've been married 12 years
  • 00:11:36.559 --> 00:11:37.526
  • I've been married 12 years now and --
  • 00:11:37.593 --> 00:11:38.894
  • [cheering and applause]
  • 00:11:39.261 --> 00:11:40.529
  • That's --
  • 00:11:40.863 --> 00:11:41.297
  • [applause]
  • 00:11:41.664 --> 00:11:42.031
  • I think that's long enough,
  • 00:11:42.431 --> 00:11:43.733
  • I think that's long enough, i'm out of, i'm out of,
  • 00:11:43.799 --> 00:11:45.034
  • I'm out of, i'm out of, i'm out of rookie camp.
  • 00:11:45.101 --> 00:11:47.036
  • [laughter]
  • 00:11:47.470 --> 00:11:48.137
  • Like we've been through
  • 00:11:48.504 --> 00:11:49.004
  • Like we've been through some things together now.
  • 00:11:49.071 --> 00:11:50.573
  • Some things together now. we've weathered a few seasons
  • 00:11:50.639 --> 00:11:52.007
  • We've weathered a few seasons together now and yes,
  • 00:11:52.074 --> 00:11:53.175
  • Together now and yes, they are many
  • 00:11:53.242 --> 00:11:54.276
  • They are many who've been married much
  • 00:11:54.343 --> 00:11:55.211
  • Who've been married much longer and i probably will not
  • 00:11:55.277 --> 00:11:57.046
  • Longer and i probably will not write a parenting book yet
  • 00:11:57.113 --> 00:11:58.414
  • Write a parenting book yet until i have, you know,
  • 00:11:58.481 --> 00:11:59.515
  • Until i have, you know, successfully shepherded
  • 00:11:59.582 --> 00:12:00.750
  • Successfully shepherded my children through
  • 00:12:00.816 --> 00:12:01.617
  • My children through their teenage years without
  • 00:12:01.684 --> 00:12:02.651
  • Their teenage years without homicide occurring in our home.
  • 00:12:02.718 --> 00:12:05.888
  • Homicide occurring in our home. but, i do think i don't
  • 00:12:05.955 --> 00:12:06.655
  • But, i do think i don't have to get up and, like,
  • 00:12:06.722 --> 00:12:08.691
  • Have to get up and, like, apologize anymore.
  • 00:12:08.758 --> 00:12:09.592
  • Apologize anymore. like, we have a marriage
  • 00:12:09.658 --> 00:12:10.726
  • Like, we have a marriage and i have some things
  • 00:12:10.793 --> 00:12:11.727
  • And i have some things to say about marriage.
  • 00:12:11.794 --> 00:12:12.595
  • To say about marriage. we have a blessed marriage
  • 00:12:12.661 --> 00:12:14.063
  • We have a blessed marriage and we're in ministry together
  • 00:12:14.130 --> 00:12:15.231
  • And we're in ministry together and we love each other and hey,
  • 00:12:15.297 --> 00:12:17.099
  • And we love each other and hey, it's not perfect.
  • 00:12:17.166 --> 00:12:19.335
  • It's not perfect. it's not.
  • 00:12:19.401 --> 00:12:19.835
  • It's not. it's not perfect
  • 00:12:19.902 --> 00:12:20.669
  • It's not perfect but it's blessed.
  • 00:12:20.736 --> 00:12:22.471
  • But it's blessed. it's a blessed marriage
  • 00:12:22.538 --> 00:12:23.272
  • It's a blessed marriage and there's a difference.
  • 00:12:23.339 --> 00:12:24.173
  • And there's a difference. there is no perfect marriage
  • 00:12:24.240 --> 00:12:25.541
  • There is no perfect marriage but there is a blessed marriage
  • 00:12:25.608 --> 00:12:26.542
  • But there is a blessed marriage and we have a blessed
  • 00:12:26.609 --> 00:12:28.177
  • And we have a blessed marriage man,
  • 00:12:28.244 --> 00:12:28.878
  • Marriage man, it's true and i want you
  • 00:12:28.944 --> 00:12:29.812
  • It's true and i want you to know that because
  • 00:12:29.879 --> 00:12:30.713
  • To know that because you wouldn't walk in a gym
  • 00:12:30.780 --> 00:12:31.981
  • You wouldn't walk in a gym and hire a trainer who was
  • 00:12:32.047 --> 00:12:33.215
  • And hire a trainer who was fatter than you are.
  • 00:12:33.282 --> 00:12:34.550
  • [laughter]
  • 00:12:34.850 --> 00:12:36.252
  • Is that inappropriate
  • 00:12:36.886 --> 00:12:37.753
  • Is that inappropriate to say?
  • 00:12:37.820 --> 00:12:38.254
  • [laughter]
  • 00:12:38.687 --> 00:12:40.156
  • I just kinda thought
  • 00:12:40.523 --> 00:12:40.990
  • I just kinda thought it was instinctive, like,
  • 00:12:41.056 --> 00:12:42.091
  • It was instinctive, like, i don't look for the guy
  • 00:12:42.158 --> 00:12:43.459
  • I don't look for the guy who doesn't look better
  • 00:12:43.526 --> 00:12:44.193
  • Who doesn't look better than me and ask him
  • 00:12:44.260 --> 00:12:44.927
  • Than me and ask him to help me sculpt my body.
  • 00:12:44.994 --> 00:12:46.529
  • To help me sculpt my body. so, you don't want a preacher
  • 00:12:46.595 --> 00:12:48.063
  • So, you don't want a preacher with a jacked up marriage.
  • 00:12:48.130 --> 00:12:49.465
  • With a jacked up marriage. and i'm just saying, like,
  • 00:12:49.532 --> 00:12:50.299
  • And i'm just saying, like, we have struggles,
  • 00:12:50.366 --> 00:12:51.233
  • We have struggles, we have issues
  • 00:12:51.300 --> 00:12:51.834
  • We have issues but we love each other
  • 00:12:51.901 --> 00:12:52.768
  • But we love each other and our family's in church
  • 00:12:52.835 --> 00:12:53.903
  • And our family's in church and so anyway,
  • 00:12:53.969 --> 00:12:55.437
  • And so anyway, with that being said...
  • 00:12:55.504 --> 00:12:56.505
  • [applause]
  • 00:12:56.906 --> 00:12:58.407
  • One of the things
  • 00:12:58.741 --> 00:12:59.175
  • One of the things that i found very difficult
  • 00:12:59.241 --> 00:13:00.109
  • That i found very difficult in our marriage is that
  • 00:13:00.176 --> 00:13:02.244
  • In our marriage is that when i ask holly a question,
  • 00:13:02.311 --> 00:13:03.879
  • When i ask holly a question, she not only answers
  • 00:13:03.946 --> 00:13:05.681
  • She not only answers that question,
  • 00:13:05.748 --> 00:13:07.750
  • That question, but i found
  • 00:13:07.817 --> 00:13:08.517
  • But i found that she will answer
  • 00:13:08.584 --> 00:13:09.418
  • That she will answer all of the questions
  • 00:13:09.485 --> 00:13:10.920
  • All of the questions that she believes
  • 00:13:10.986 --> 00:13:12.054
  • That she believes i should have asked
  • 00:13:12.121 --> 00:13:14.056
  • I should have asked before she answers
  • 00:13:14.123 --> 00:13:15.057
  • Before she answers the questions that i did ask.
  • 00:13:15.124 --> 00:13:16.959
  • The questions that i did ask. and so, i've had to learn
  • 00:13:17.026 --> 00:13:18.060
  • And so, i've had to learn to budget my time appropriately
  • 00:13:18.127 --> 00:13:20.062
  • To budget my time appropriately when i ask her things like,
  • 00:13:20.129 --> 00:13:21.463
  • When i ask her things like, "how was your day?"
  • 00:13:21.530 --> 00:13:22.264
  • "how was your day?" or just a simple question like,
  • 00:13:22.331 --> 00:13:23.766
  • Or just a simple question like, when i say, you know,
  • 00:13:23.833 --> 00:13:24.733
  • When i say, you know, "how was lunch today?
  • 00:13:24.800 --> 00:13:26.435
  • "how was lunch today? i know you had lunch today
  • 00:13:26.502 --> 00:13:27.336
  • I know you had lunch today with nicole,
  • 00:13:27.403 --> 00:13:27.970
  • With nicole, how was lunch today?"
  • 00:13:28.037 --> 00:13:29.071
  • How was lunch today?" because she --
  • 00:13:29.138 --> 00:13:29.738
  • Because she -- when i ask her that,
  • 00:13:29.805 --> 00:13:30.606
  • When i ask her that, she will answer it but she
  • 00:13:30.673 --> 00:13:31.807
  • She will answer it but she will not start with lunch,
  • 00:13:31.874 --> 00:13:33.142
  • Will not start with lunch, she'll start with,
  • 00:13:33.209 --> 00:13:34.210
  • She'll start with, you know when she woke up
  • 00:13:34.276 --> 00:13:35.377
  • You know when she woke up 15 minutes late
  • 00:13:35.444 --> 00:13:37.213
  • 15 minutes late and she was already
  • 00:13:37.279 --> 00:13:38.347
  • And she was already in a hurry and we had
  • 00:13:38.414 --> 00:13:40.316
  • In a hurry and we had to get the kids to school.
  • 00:13:40.382 --> 00:13:41.250
  • To get the kids to school. now the kids have been late
  • 00:13:41.317 --> 00:13:42.117
  • Now the kids have been late two times and so we don't
  • 00:13:42.184 --> 00:13:43.319
  • Two times and so we don't want 'em to be late for
  • 00:13:43.385 --> 00:13:44.053
  • Want 'em to be late for a third time this semester.
  • 00:13:44.119 --> 00:13:44.854
  • A third time this semester. and so, she got 'em to school.
  • 00:13:44.920 --> 00:13:46.355
  • And so, she got 'em to school. when she dropped 'em off
  • 00:13:46.422 --> 00:13:47.122
  • When she dropped 'em off at school she remembered
  • 00:13:47.189 --> 00:13:48.090
  • At school she remembered that she had that thing
  • 00:13:48.157 --> 00:13:49.124
  • That she had that thing in the back of her car
  • 00:13:49.191 --> 00:13:50.125
  • In the back of her car that needed to go back
  • 00:13:50.192 --> 00:13:51.060
  • To target but then she
  • 00:13:51.160 --> 00:13:51.794
  • To target but then she realized that she needed
  • 00:13:51.861 --> 00:13:52.962
  • Realized that she needed more gas in the car.
  • 00:13:53.028 --> 00:13:53.996
  • More gas in the car. now, the gas is cheaper
  • 00:13:54.063 --> 00:13:54.930
  • Now, the gas is cheaper at the gas station
  • 00:13:54.997 --> 00:13:56.131
  • At the gas station on the other side of target
  • 00:13:56.198 --> 00:13:57.299
  • On the other side of target and so i didn't know
  • 00:13:57.366 --> 00:13:58.267
  • And so i didn't know if i should wait
  • 00:13:58.334 --> 00:13:59.001
  • If i should wait but i stopped by target.
  • 00:13:59.068 --> 00:14:00.169
  • But i stopped by target. while i was in line at target,
  • 00:14:00.236 --> 00:14:01.370
  • While i was in line at target, i met a lady who said
  • 00:14:01.437 --> 00:14:02.271
  • I met a lady who said she went to the church
  • 00:14:02.338 --> 00:14:03.105
  • She went to the church and i couldn't tell
  • 00:14:03.172 --> 00:14:04.039
  • And i couldn't tell if she comes a lot or if
  • 00:14:04.106 --> 00:14:05.274
  • She just comes a little bit.
  • 00:14:05.374 --> 00:14:06.008
  • She just comes a little bit. she was from new jersey and she
  • 00:14:06.075 --> 00:14:07.576
  • She was from new jersey and she said she just moved to charlotte
  • 00:14:07.643 --> 00:14:08.878
  • Said she just moved to charlotte and she moved to charlotte
  • 00:14:08.944 --> 00:14:09.912
  • And she moved to charlotte because her husband's
  • 00:14:09.979 --> 00:14:10.579
  • Because her husband's in the banking industry
  • 00:14:10.646 --> 00:14:11.580
  • In the banking industry and she was telling me about
  • 00:14:11.647 --> 00:14:12.815
  • And she was telling me about how their home in new jersey.
  • 00:14:12.882 --> 00:14:14.016
  • How their home in new jersey. and i'm going, "wait a minute,
  • 00:14:14.083 --> 00:14:14.984
  • And i'm going, "wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.
  • 00:14:15.050 --> 00:14:15.885
  • [laughter]
  • 00:14:16.218 --> 00:14:16.619
  • In this story, you're telling,
  • 00:14:17.186 --> 00:14:18.821
  • In this story, you're telling, we're only at 8:30...
  • 00:14:18.888 --> 00:14:20.289
  • [laughter]
  • 00:14:20.756 --> 00:14:21.223
  • In the morning.
  • 00:14:21.757 --> 00:14:22.391
  • In the morning. is this gonna be real time?
  • 00:14:22.458 --> 00:14:23.993
  • Is this gonna be real time? i wanna hear everything
  • 00:14:24.059 --> 00:14:24.827
  • I wanna hear everything you have to say.
  • 00:14:24.894 --> 00:14:25.661
  • You have to say. i am so captivated
  • 00:14:25.728 --> 00:14:26.729
  • I am so captivated by this conversation,
  • 00:14:26.795 --> 00:14:27.963
  • By this conversation, i just need to know,
  • 00:14:28.030 --> 00:14:28.998
  • I just need to know, should i cancel my plans
  • 00:14:29.064 --> 00:14:29.999
  • Should i cancel my plans for the rest of the night?"
  • 00:14:30.065 --> 00:14:31.033
  • [laughter]
  • 00:14:31.367 --> 00:14:32.401
  • Come on, somebody.
  • 00:14:32.701 --> 00:14:33.035
  • [laughter]
  • 00:14:33.469 --> 00:14:34.670
  • Don't you men
  • 00:14:36.605 --> 00:14:37.506
  • Don't you men dare leave me up here
  • 00:14:37.573 --> 00:14:38.207
  • Dare leave me up here by myself on this,
  • 00:14:38.274 --> 00:14:38.974
  • By myself on this, it's just different.
  • 00:14:39.041 --> 00:14:40.876
  • It's just different. because, typically a man
  • 00:14:40.943 --> 00:14:43.412
  • Because, typically a man is going to respond
  • 00:14:43.479 --> 00:14:44.480
  • Is going to respond to the question,
  • 00:14:44.546 --> 00:14:45.381
  • To the question, "how was your day?"
  • 00:14:45.447 --> 00:14:46.181
  • "how was your day?" with one syllable.
  • 00:14:46.248 --> 00:14:47.249
  • With one syllable. it's monosyllabic.
  • 00:14:47.316 --> 00:14:48.417
  • It's monosyllabic. it's just one --
  • 00:14:48.484 --> 00:14:49.385
  • It's just one -- that's all we need.
  • 00:14:49.451 --> 00:14:50.419
  • That's all we need. we got fine.
  • 00:14:50.486 --> 00:14:51.887
  • We got fine. we got good,
  • 00:14:51.954 --> 00:14:52.621
  • We got good, we got great and sometimes
  • 00:14:52.688 --> 00:14:54.089
  • We got great and sometimes we can just shrug.
  • 00:14:54.156 --> 00:14:55.024
  • We can just shrug. we don't even have to be
  • 00:14:55.090 --> 00:14:55.791
  • We don't even have to be bothered with activating
  • 00:14:55.858 --> 00:14:57.226
  • Bothered with activating our voice box at all.
  • 00:14:57.293 --> 00:14:58.227
  • Our voice box at all. so, we have this ability
  • 00:14:58.294 --> 00:14:59.962
  • So, we have this ability to communicate more succinctly.
  • 00:15:00.029 --> 00:15:02.531
  • To communicate more succinctly. and, i used to think it was just
  • 00:15:02.598 --> 00:15:03.933
  • And, i used to think it was just holly until the other day,
  • 00:15:03.999 --> 00:15:05.434
  • Holly until the other day, i asked abby,
  • 00:15:05.501 --> 00:15:07.002
  • I asked abby, "what's your
  • 00:15:07.069 --> 00:15:07.670
  • "what's your favorite thing to do, abby?"
  • 00:15:07.736 --> 00:15:09.104
  • Favorite thing to do, abby?" and she said, "well, i like
  • 00:15:09.171 --> 00:15:10.072
  • And she said, "well, i like to go to the pool,
  • 00:15:10.139 --> 00:15:11.140
  • To go to the pool, but this one time, bubba."
  • 00:15:11.206 --> 00:15:12.474
  • But this one time, bubba." i said, "oh, god,
  • 00:15:12.541 --> 00:15:13.142
  • I said, "oh, god, she's got the disease,
  • 00:15:13.208 --> 00:15:14.843
  • She's got the disease, i mean the gift.
  • 00:15:14.910 --> 00:15:15.344
  • I mean the gift. she's got the gift, too.
  • 00:15:15.411 --> 00:15:16.745
  • She's got the gift, too. she's got the genetic
  • 00:15:16.812 --> 00:15:17.613
  • She's got the genetic generational blessing
  • 00:15:17.680 --> 00:15:19.648
  • Generational blessing too of elaboration."
  • 00:15:19.715 --> 00:15:21.617
  • Too of elaboration." and so, in 1 corinthians 7,
  • 00:15:21.684 --> 00:15:23.852
  • And so, in 1 corinthians 7, the apostle paul is acting
  • 00:15:23.919 --> 00:15:25.287
  • The apostle paul is acting like a woman, y'all.
  • 00:15:25.354 --> 00:15:26.822
  • [laughter]
  • 00:15:27.256 --> 00:15:28.123
  • The corinthians wanna know,
  • 00:15:28.457 --> 00:15:29.925
  • The corinthians wanna know, "hey, like is it okay
  • 00:15:29.992 --> 00:15:30.826
  • "hey, like is it okay to be single?
  • 00:15:30.893 --> 00:15:31.860
  • To be single? what should we do about widows?"
  • 00:15:31.927 --> 00:15:32.895
  • What should we do about widows?" and they ask him this sanitized
  • 00:15:32.962 --> 00:15:34.697
  • And they ask him this sanitized list of questions and he takes
  • 00:15:34.763 --> 00:15:37.666
  • List of questions and he takes six chapters to deal with
  • 00:15:37.733 --> 00:15:40.369
  • Six chapters to deal with their real issues before
  • 00:15:40.436 --> 00:15:43.172
  • Their real issues before he will answer the questions.
  • 00:15:43.238 --> 00:15:45.207
  • He will answer the questions. now, it's very possible that
  • 00:15:45.274 --> 00:15:47.142
  • Now, it's very possible that you came to church today
  • 00:15:47.209 --> 00:15:48.610
  • You came to church today with questions about
  • 00:15:48.677 --> 00:15:50.746
  • With questions about your relationships,
  • 00:15:50.813 --> 00:15:51.680
  • Your relationships, valid questions about
  • 00:15:51.747 --> 00:15:53.015
  • Valid questions about your relationships like,
  • 00:15:53.082 --> 00:15:54.283
  • Your relationships like, "how will i know
  • 00:15:54.350 --> 00:15:54.883
  • "how will i know when he's the one,
  • 00:15:54.950 --> 00:15:55.584
  • When he's the one, and how will i know
  • 00:15:55.651 --> 00:15:56.352
  • And how will i know when the time is right,
  • 00:15:56.418 --> 00:15:57.086
  • When the time is right, and how will i find
  • 00:15:57.152 --> 00:15:57.987
  • And how will i find the right one?"
  • 00:15:58.053 --> 00:15:58.587
  • The right one?" but, perhaps the question
  • 00:15:58.654 --> 00:16:00.189
  • But, perhaps the question you're asking is not
  • 00:16:00.255 --> 00:16:01.857
  • You're asking is not the real issue that
  • 00:16:01.924 --> 00:16:03.525
  • The real issue that you need to be dealing with,
  • 00:16:03.592 --> 00:16:04.460
  • You need to be dealing with, perhaps there's an issue
  • 00:16:04.526 --> 00:16:06.128
  • Perhaps there's an issue that's more important
  • 00:16:06.195 --> 00:16:07.763
  • That's more important than the question.
  • 00:16:07.830 --> 00:16:08.364
  • Than the question. and perhaps before god
  • 00:16:08.430 --> 00:16:10.866
  • And perhaps before god gives you some specific answers
  • 00:16:10.933 --> 00:16:12.701
  • Gives you some specific answers to your questions,
  • 00:16:12.768 --> 00:16:14.536
  • To your questions, he wants to give you
  • 00:16:14.603 --> 00:16:15.170
  • He wants to give you some healing for some of your
  • 00:16:15.237 --> 00:16:16.972
  • Some healing for some of your issues and some instructions
  • 00:16:17.039 --> 00:16:19.241
  • Issues and some instructions for some of your issues.
  • 00:16:19.308 --> 00:16:20.509
  • [applause]
  • 00:16:20.876 --> 00:16:21.744
  • See, before you find
  • 00:16:22.478 --> 00:16:23.512
  • See, before you find the right one and mess up
  • 00:16:23.579 --> 00:16:24.913
  • The right one and mess up the right one,
  • 00:16:24.980 --> 00:16:26.215
  • The right one, because you're not yet
  • 00:16:26.281 --> 00:16:27.049
  • Because you're not yet the right one because you've
  • 00:16:27.116 --> 00:16:28.183
  • The right one because you've got issues that are undealt with
  • 00:16:28.250 --> 00:16:30.152
  • Got issues that are undealt with and you're looking
  • 00:16:30.219 --> 00:16:31.053
  • And you're looking for somebody for security,
  • 00:16:31.120 --> 00:16:32.521
  • For somebody for security, and before you reach out
  • 00:16:32.588 --> 00:16:33.722
  • And before you reach out and try to put
  • 00:16:33.789 --> 00:16:34.256
  • And try to put the weight of your life
  • 00:16:34.323 --> 00:16:35.357
  • The weight of your life and the expectation
  • 00:16:35.424 --> 00:16:36.392
  • And the expectation of your happiness
  • 00:16:36.458 --> 00:16:37.493
  • Of your happiness on another person,
  • 00:16:37.559 --> 00:16:38.460
  • On another person, perhaps god wants
  • 00:16:38.527 --> 00:16:39.928
  • Perhaps god wants to teach you some sufficiency
  • 00:16:39.995 --> 00:16:41.196
  • To teach you some sufficiency inside of yourself
  • 00:16:41.263 --> 00:16:42.631
  • Inside of yourself in christ so that when
  • 00:16:42.698 --> 00:16:44.400
  • In christ so that when you do meet somebody,
  • 00:16:44.466 --> 00:16:45.601
  • You do meet somebody, you won't project
  • 00:16:45.667 --> 00:16:46.735
  • You won't project all of your dysfunction
  • 00:16:46.802 --> 00:16:48.037
  • All of your dysfunction on that relationship.
  • 00:16:48.103 --> 00:16:49.271
  • On that relationship. 'cause you can turn
  • 00:16:49.338 --> 00:16:50.039
  • 'cause you can turn the right one into
  • 00:16:50.105 --> 00:16:50.839
  • The right one into the wrong one if you
  • 00:16:50.906 --> 00:16:52.307
  • The wrong one if you don't deal with your issues.
  • 00:16:52.374 --> 00:16:54.209
  • [applause]
  • 00:16:54.610 --> 00:16:56.211
  • Touch three people,
  • 00:16:56.845 --> 00:16:57.579
  • Touch three people, tell 'em, "we got issues."
  • 00:16:57.646 --> 00:16:59.148
  • Tell 'em, "we got issues." >> congregation: we got issues.
  • 00:16:59.214 --> 00:17:01.650
  • >> congregation: we got issues. >> we do.
  • 00:17:01.717 --> 00:17:03.118
  • >> we do. we do.
  • 00:17:03.185 --> 00:17:03.786
  • We do. the church at corinth was crazy.
  • 00:17:03.852 --> 00:17:07.523
  • The church at corinth was crazy. prostitutes and incest,
  • 00:17:07.589 --> 00:17:08.991
  • Prostitutes and incest, and rampant misunderstandings
  • 00:17:09.058 --> 00:17:13.328
  • And rampant misunderstandings of marriage.
  • 00:17:13.395 --> 00:17:14.830
  • This church of new christians
  • 00:17:14.930 --> 00:17:17.900
  • This church of new christians who were living
  • 00:17:17.966 --> 00:17:19.234
  • Who were living under roman rule,
  • 00:17:19.301 --> 00:17:20.836
  • Under roman rule, trying to figure out
  • 00:17:20.903 --> 00:17:21.770
  • Trying to figure out how to do it god's way in
  • 00:17:21.837 --> 00:17:23.439
  • How to do it god's way in a culture that was ungodly.
  • 00:17:23.505 --> 00:17:26.075
  • A culture that was ungodly. and paul says, "let's talk about
  • 00:17:26.141 --> 00:17:27.943
  • And paul says, "let's talk about the real issues."
  • 00:17:28.010 --> 00:17:28.544
  • The real issues." now, historically the church
  • 00:17:28.610 --> 00:17:29.778
  • Has been really good
  • 00:17:29.878 --> 00:17:30.646
  • Has been really good at answering questions
  • 00:17:30.712 --> 00:17:31.847
  • At answering questions that nobody is asking,
  • 00:17:31.914 --> 00:17:37.019
  • That nobody is asking, while being silent
  • 00:17:37.086 --> 00:17:37.719
  • While being silent about the struggles
  • 00:17:37.786 --> 00:17:38.520
  • About the struggles that everybody is facing.
  • 00:17:38.587 --> 00:17:42.324
  • That everybody is facing. so, we put charts on the wall
  • 00:17:42.391 --> 00:17:43.859
  • So, we put charts on the wall about when jesus is coming back
  • 00:17:43.926 --> 00:17:46.028
  • About when jesus is coming back even though he said nobody knew
  • 00:17:46.095 --> 00:17:47.529
  • Even though he said nobody knew 'cause he's coming like
  • 00:17:47.596 --> 00:17:48.697
  • 'cause he's coming like a thief in the night.
  • 00:17:48.764 --> 00:17:49.398
  • A thief in the night. meanwhile, we got
  • 00:17:49.465 --> 00:17:50.132
  • Meanwhile, we got middle schoolers having
  • 00:17:50.199 --> 00:17:51.200
  • Middle schoolers having oral sex on the back
  • 00:17:51.266 --> 00:17:52.101
  • Oral sex on the back of the school bus
  • 00:17:52.167 --> 00:17:52.868
  • Of the school bus and nobody's standing up
  • 00:17:52.935 --> 00:17:54.269
  • And nobody's standing up and saying anything
  • 00:17:54.336 --> 00:17:55.337
  • And saying anything about real issues.
  • 00:17:55.404 --> 00:17:56.805
  • [applause]
  • 00:17:57.139 --> 00:17:59.475
  • And we got christians
  • 00:17:59.975 --> 00:18:00.843
  • And we got christians miserable in their marriages
  • 00:18:00.909 --> 00:18:02.044
  • Miserable in their marriages and just looking for a way out
  • 00:18:02.111 --> 00:18:03.545
  • And just looking for a way out and married people wishing
  • 00:18:03.612 --> 00:18:04.880
  • And married people wishing they were single again,
  • 00:18:04.947 --> 00:18:05.814
  • They were single again, and single people
  • 00:18:05.881 --> 00:18:06.915
  • And single people trying all the wrong stuff on
  • 00:18:06.982 --> 00:18:08.183
  • Trying all the wrong stuff on before the find the right one
  • 00:18:08.250 --> 00:18:09.384
  • Before the find the right one and nobody's saying anything.
  • 00:18:09.451 --> 00:18:11.086
  • And nobody's saying anything. we got people dealing with
  • 00:18:11.153 --> 00:18:12.588
  • We got people dealing with issues of sexual abuse
  • 00:18:12.654 --> 00:18:15.124
  • Issues of sexual abuse and they can't --
  • 00:18:15.190 --> 00:18:15.757
  • And they can't -- they can't engage
  • 00:18:15.824 --> 00:18:16.825
  • They can't engage in a loving relationship
  • 00:18:16.892 --> 00:18:17.893
  • In a loving relationship in a healthy way because
  • 00:18:17.960 --> 00:18:19.261
  • In a healthy way because nobody's talking about issues.
  • 00:18:19.328 --> 00:18:22.064
  • Nobody's talking about issues. oh, we got tips, we got tricks,
  • 00:18:22.131 --> 00:18:24.032
  • Oh, we got tips, we got tricks, but we don't deal with
  • 00:18:24.099 --> 00:18:27.369
  • But we don't deal with the real issues.
  • 00:18:27.436 --> 00:18:29.605
  • The real issues. i wanna take five weeks with you
  • 00:18:29.671 --> 00:18:31.140
  • I wanna take five weeks with you and have conversations
  • 00:18:31.206 --> 00:18:32.141
  • And have conversations about real issues,
  • 00:18:32.207 --> 00:18:34.977
  • About real issues, because some of you
  • 00:18:35.043 --> 00:18:35.477
  • Because some of you the questions that
  • 00:18:35.544 --> 00:18:36.578
  • The questions that you're asking are not
  • 00:18:36.645 --> 00:18:37.880
  • You're asking are not indicative of the real issues
  • 00:18:37.946 --> 00:18:39.548
  • Indicative of the real issues that you're dealing with,
  • 00:18:39.615 --> 00:18:42.117
  • That you're dealing with, the issues that you don't
  • 00:18:42.184 --> 00:18:42.918
  • The issues that you don't even know how to talk about.
  • 00:18:42.985 --> 00:18:46.221
  • Even know how to talk about. i got teenagers in my church
  • 00:18:46.288 --> 00:18:49.124
  • I got teenagers in my church trying to figure out
  • 00:18:49.191 --> 00:18:51.860
  • Trying to figure out how they can deal with
  • 00:18:51.927 --> 00:18:52.961
  • How they can deal with their sexual conflict
  • 00:18:53.028 --> 00:18:55.531
  • Their sexual conflict knowing that if they admitted
  • 00:18:55.597 --> 00:18:56.798
  • Knowing that if they admitted to their friends what they're
  • 00:18:56.865 --> 00:18:58.133
  • To their friends what they're really thinking about inside,
  • 00:18:58.200 --> 00:18:59.368
  • Really thinking about inside, they wouldn't have
  • 00:18:59.434 --> 00:19:00.002
  • They wouldn't have any friends anymore,
  • 00:19:00.068 --> 00:19:01.270
  • Any friends anymore, and some of them
  • 00:19:01.336 --> 00:19:01.870
  • And some of them are considering suicide
  • 00:19:01.937 --> 00:19:03.005
  • Are considering suicide because they can't find anywhere
  • 00:19:03.071 --> 00:19:04.540
  • Because they can't find anywhere to talk about their issues.
  • 00:19:04.606 --> 00:19:07.409
  • To talk about their issues. and i'm supposed to stand up
  • 00:19:07.476 --> 00:19:08.210
  • And i'm supposed to stand up here and just talk about
  • 00:19:08.277 --> 00:19:09.244
  • Here and just talk about the book of revelation?
  • 00:19:09.311 --> 00:19:12.314
  • The book of revelation? answering questions that
  • 00:19:12.381 --> 00:19:13.582
  • Answering questions that nobody's asking while people
  • 00:19:13.649 --> 00:19:14.816
  • Nobody's asking while people are dying of issues?
  • 00:19:14.883 --> 00:19:16.418
  • Are dying of issues? i got couples that came
  • 00:19:16.485 --> 00:19:17.686
  • I got couples that came to church this morning smiling
  • 00:19:17.753 --> 00:19:19.354
  • To church this morning smiling knowing good and well
  • 00:19:19.421 --> 00:19:20.222
  • Knowing good and well you're trying to figure out
  • 00:19:20.289 --> 00:19:21.056
  • You're trying to figure out which divorce lawyer
  • 00:19:21.123 --> 00:19:22.257
  • Which divorce lawyer 'cause you've got issues.
  • 00:19:22.324 --> 00:19:26.195
  • 'cause you've got issues. already making your escape plan
  • 00:19:26.261 --> 00:19:27.296
  • Already making your escape plan but came to church praising
  • 00:19:27.362 --> 00:19:28.697
  • But came to church praising the lord and it's the only time
  • 00:19:28.764 --> 00:19:30.799
  • The lord and it's the only time you smile all week
  • 00:19:30.866 --> 00:19:31.733
  • You smile all week is when you're around
  • 00:19:31.800 --> 00:19:32.434
  • Is when you're around other people 'cause
  • 00:19:32.501 --> 00:19:33.335
  • Other people 'cause you've got issues.
  • 00:19:33.402 --> 00:19:34.536
  • You've got issues. so, i'm supposed to stand up
  • 00:19:34.603 --> 00:19:35.604
  • So, i'm supposed to stand up here and just pontificate about
  • 00:19:35.671 --> 00:19:37.639
  • Here and just pontificate about crap that nobody's really
  • 00:19:37.706 --> 00:19:38.874
  • Crap that nobody's really thinking about,
  • 00:19:38.941 --> 00:19:40.342
  • Thinking about, making it sound spiritual
  • 00:19:40.409 --> 00:19:42.010
  • Making it sound spiritual while our marriages look
  • 00:19:42.077 --> 00:19:44.079
  • While our marriages look no different than the world?
  • 00:19:44.146 --> 00:19:45.681
  • No different than the world? and paul says, "i wanna speak
  • 00:19:45.747 --> 00:19:46.982
  • And paul says, "i wanna speak to you about real issues."
  • 00:19:47.049 --> 00:19:50.652
  • To you about real issues." and he says,
  • 00:19:50.719 --> 00:19:51.053
  • And he says, "now, that we've talked
  • 00:19:51.119 --> 00:19:52.120
  • "now, that we've talked about the real stuff,
  • 00:19:52.187 --> 00:19:55.757
  • About the real stuff, i'll deal with your question."
  • 00:19:55.824 --> 00:19:57.826
  • I'll deal with your question." and here's a question
  • 00:19:57.893 --> 00:19:58.493
  • And here's a question somebody had posed to paul,
  • 00:19:58.560 --> 00:19:59.628
  • Somebody had posed to paul, they asked him, they said,
  • 00:19:59.695 --> 00:20:01.630
  • They asked him, they said, "is it okay if we wanna not get
  • 00:20:01.697 --> 00:20:03.732
  • "is it okay if we wanna not get married and we wanna make
  • 00:20:03.799 --> 00:20:05.000
  • Married and we wanna make a decision to be single?
  • 00:20:05.067 --> 00:20:07.202
  • A decision to be single? is that okay?"
  • 00:20:07.269 --> 00:20:07.970
  • Is that okay?" and paul says in verse 1,
  • 00:20:08.036 --> 00:20:09.137
  • "yeah, that's fine.
  • 00:20:09.238 --> 00:20:10.973
  • "yeah, that's fine. okay, now about
  • 00:20:11.039 --> 00:20:12.040
  • Okay, now about the questions you asked."
  • 00:20:12.107 --> 00:20:12.774
  • The questions you asked." look at this,
  • 00:20:12.841 --> 00:20:13.175
  • Look at this, "it's good for a man
  • 00:20:13.242 --> 00:20:15.377
  • "it's good for a man not to have sexual relations
  • 00:20:15.444 --> 00:20:16.912
  • Not to have sexual relations with a woman.
  • 00:20:16.979 --> 00:20:18.614
  • With a woman. that's fine."
  • 00:20:18.680 --> 00:20:20.482
  • And paul's not saying
  • 00:20:20.582 --> 00:20:21.016
  • And paul's not saying you're better or you're worse.
  • 00:20:21.083 --> 00:20:22.017
  • You're better or you're worse. he's just saying that's fine.
  • 00:20:22.084 --> 00:20:24.319
  • He's just saying that's fine. he saying, like in different
  • 00:20:24.386 --> 00:20:25.420
  • He saying, like in different seasons of our lives,
  • 00:20:25.487 --> 00:20:26.188
  • Seasons of our lives, we'll all have
  • 00:20:26.255 --> 00:20:27.422
  • We'll all have different callings that
  • 00:20:27.489 --> 00:20:29.691
  • Different callings that we'll experience and it's good.
  • 00:20:29.758 --> 00:20:32.261
  • We'll experience and it's good. you know, one of the things
  • 00:20:32.327 --> 00:20:33.228
  • You know, one of the things i refuse to do in this series
  • 00:20:33.295 --> 00:20:34.429
  • I refuse to do in this series is to make single people
  • 00:20:34.496 --> 00:20:35.530
  • Feel second class.
  • 00:20:35.631 --> 00:20:40.202
  • Feel second class. to make single people
  • 00:20:40.269 --> 00:20:40.836
  • To make single people feel like, you know, like,
  • 00:20:40.902 --> 00:20:42.604
  • Feel like, you know, like, now this is for
  • 00:20:42.671 --> 00:20:43.538
  • Now this is for the big boys and girls.
  • 00:20:43.605 --> 00:20:44.606
  • The big boys and girls. we got a little table
  • 00:20:44.673 --> 00:20:45.440
  • We got a little table for you over here.
  • 00:20:45.507 --> 00:20:46.275
  • For you over here. happy thanksgiving, kids.
  • 00:20:46.341 --> 00:20:49.211
  • Happy thanksgiving, kids. here's some hawaiian punch.
  • 00:20:49.278 --> 00:20:49.945
  • Here's some hawaiian punch. no, i'm not doing that.
  • 00:20:50.012 --> 00:20:52.247
  • No, i'm not doing that. i'm not gonna do that.
  • 00:20:52.314 --> 00:20:54.316
  • I'm not gonna do that. there is a verse,
  • 00:20:54.383 --> 00:20:55.651
  • There is a verse, there is a verse,
  • 00:20:55.717 --> 00:20:57.352
  • And this is a verse that
  • 00:20:57.452 --> 00:20:58.020
  • And this is a verse that single people really love
  • 00:20:58.086 --> 00:20:59.388
  • Single people really love in genesis 2:18 where god
  • 00:20:59.454 --> 00:21:02.224
  • Tells adam after he makes adam,
  • 00:21:02.324 --> 00:21:04.526
  • Tells adam after he makes adam, he says, "it's not good
  • 00:21:04.593 --> 00:21:05.961
  • He says, "it's not good for the man to be alone.
  • 00:21:06.028 --> 00:21:08.597
  • For the man to be alone. i'll make him a helper
  • 00:21:08.664 --> 00:21:09.231
  • I'll make him a helper suitable for him."
  • 00:21:09.298 --> 00:21:11.366
  • He says it's not good
  • 00:21:11.466 --> 00:21:12.067
  • He says it's not good for a man to be alone.
  • 00:21:12.134 --> 00:21:12.834
  • For a man to be alone. now, a lot of people have taken
  • 00:21:12.901 --> 00:21:14.069
  • Now, a lot of people have taken that verse to mean that
  • 00:21:14.136 --> 00:21:15.037
  • That verse to mean that if you're not married,
  • 00:21:15.103 --> 00:21:16.038
  • If you're not married, then you're alone
  • 00:21:16.104 --> 00:21:16.705
  • Then you're alone but that's not true at all.
  • 00:21:16.772 --> 00:21:19.775
  • But that's not true at all. you can be single and you can be
  • 00:21:19.841 --> 00:21:22.110
  • You can be single and you can be unmarried and still be complete.
  • 00:21:22.177 --> 00:21:26.581
  • Unmarried and still be complete. you can be single and not be
  • 00:21:26.648 --> 00:21:28.684
  • You can be single and not be married and still not be alone.
  • 00:21:28.750 --> 00:21:31.353
  • Married and still not be alone. you can have a church family,
  • 00:21:31.420 --> 00:21:33.488
  • You can have a church family, you can have deeper friendships,
  • 00:21:33.555 --> 00:21:36.124
  • You can have deeper friendships, you can have opportunities
  • 00:21:36.191 --> 00:21:37.259
  • You can have opportunities that those of us who are
  • 00:21:37.326 --> 00:21:38.527
  • That those of us who are married used to have.
  • 00:21:38.593 --> 00:21:40.762
  • Married used to have. hello, those of us who have
  • 00:21:40.829 --> 00:21:41.563
  • Hello, those of us who have children have forgotten about.
  • 00:21:41.630 --> 00:21:44.132
  • Children have forgotten about. there are things you can do --
  • 00:21:44.199 --> 00:21:45.133
  • There are things you can do -- and i'm gonna do this
  • 00:21:45.200 --> 00:21:46.234
  • And i'm gonna do this in the series, okay,
  • 00:21:46.301 --> 00:21:46.835
  • In the series, okay, so you gotta come back,
  • 00:21:46.902 --> 00:21:47.502
  • So you gotta come back, you gotta come back.
  • 00:21:47.569 --> 00:21:48.003
  • You gotta come back. i'm gonna talk in a way
  • 00:21:48.070 --> 00:21:49.771
  • I'm gonna talk in a way that maybe you never heard
  • 00:21:49.838 --> 00:21:50.405
  • That maybe you never heard before about the advantages
  • 00:21:50.472 --> 00:21:51.707
  • Before about the advantages of singleness.
  • 00:21:51.773 --> 00:21:52.274
  • Of singleness. "well, it's easy
  • 00:21:52.341 --> 00:21:52.941
  • "well, it's easy for you to say."
  • 00:21:53.008 --> 00:21:53.675
  • [laughter]
  • 00:21:54.109 --> 00:21:55.210
  • I mean, i understand.
  • 00:21:55.510 --> 00:21:56.244
  • I mean, i understand. i don't understand what it
  • 00:21:56.311 --> 00:21:58.013
  • I don't understand what it would be like to be single.
  • 00:21:58.080 --> 00:21:59.548
  • Would be like to be single. holly and i got married
  • 00:21:59.614 --> 00:22:00.816
  • Holly and i got married right out of college,
  • 00:22:00.882 --> 00:22:01.850
  • Right out of college, but can i be honest with you?
  • 00:22:01.917 --> 00:22:04.186
  • But can i be honest with you? each season has strengths
  • 00:22:04.252 --> 00:22:07.422
  • Each season has strengths and struggles.
  • 00:22:07.489 --> 00:22:11.026
  • And struggles. each season.
  • 00:22:11.093 --> 00:22:12.561
  • Each season. and paul says if you're in
  • 00:22:12.627 --> 00:22:13.862
  • And paul says if you're in a season called single
  • 00:22:13.929 --> 00:22:15.997
  • A season called single that's not bad.
  • 00:22:16.064 --> 00:22:18.667
  • That's not bad. you're not some
  • 00:22:18.734 --> 00:22:19.134
  • You're not some half-baked person
  • 00:22:19.201 --> 00:22:20.268
  • Half-baked person walking around.
  • 00:22:20.335 --> 00:22:21.536
  • Walking around. you're not some
  • 00:22:21.603 --> 00:22:22.104
  • You're not some zombie walking around.
  • 00:22:22.170 --> 00:22:24.740
  • Zombie walking around. you're not a freak
  • 00:22:24.806 --> 00:22:25.273
  • You're not a freak 'cause you're single.
  • 00:22:25.340 --> 00:22:27.776
  • 'cause you're single. hey, virgins, you're not weird.
  • 00:22:27.843 --> 00:22:32.314
  • Hey, virgins, you're not weird. i was a virgin when
  • 00:22:32.381 --> 00:22:33.181
  • I was a virgin when i married my wife,
  • 00:22:33.248 --> 00:22:34.383
  • I married my wife, i'm proud of it.
  • 00:22:34.449 --> 00:22:35.650
  • [applause]
  • 00:22:35.984 --> 00:22:36.451
  • Look at me crazy.
  • 00:22:36.852 --> 00:22:37.786
  • [applause]
  • 00:22:38.086 --> 00:22:40.455
  • He said it's good
  • 00:22:40.822 --> 00:22:41.590
  • He said it's good to do it god's way.
  • 00:22:41.656 --> 00:22:42.691
  • To do it god's way. it's good.
  • 00:22:42.758 --> 00:22:43.492
  • It's good. it's good.
  • 00:22:43.558 --> 00:22:44.292
  • It's good. i wanna say to my single
  • 00:22:44.359 --> 00:22:46.094
  • I wanna say to my single brothers and sisters,
  • 00:22:46.161 --> 00:22:47.028
  • Brothers and sisters, "you're good."
  • 00:22:47.095 --> 00:22:49.564
  • "you're good." you don't need somebody
  • 00:22:49.631 --> 00:22:50.298
  • You don't need somebody on your arm to make you good,
  • 00:22:50.365 --> 00:22:51.767
  • On your arm to make you good, you're good 'cause god made you
  • 00:22:51.833 --> 00:22:53.235
  • You're good 'cause god made you and god makes good stuff.
  • 00:22:53.301 --> 00:22:55.003
  • And god makes good stuff. you're good.
  • 00:22:55.070 --> 00:22:56.571
  • You're good. you're good.
  • 00:22:56.638 --> 00:22:57.939
  • [applause]
  • 00:22:59.007 --> 00:23:00.442
  • >> alright, let's interact
  • 00:23:01.410 --> 00:23:02.277
  • >> alright, let's interact for a moment,
  • 00:23:02.344 --> 00:23:03.311
  • For a moment, just pretend like
  • 00:23:03.378 --> 00:23:03.912
  • Just pretend like i'm there with you.
  • 00:23:03.979 --> 00:23:04.880
  • I'm there with you. have you ever experienced
  • 00:23:04.946 --> 00:23:06.648
  • Have you ever experienced a challenging relationship?
  • 00:23:06.715 --> 00:23:08.617
  • A challenging relationship? holly do this, do this.
  • 00:23:08.683 --> 00:23:11.219
  • Holly do this, do this. okay, be careful how
  • 00:23:11.286 --> 00:23:12.087
  • You respond if you're sitting
  • 00:23:12.187 --> 00:23:12.954
  • You respond if you're sitting in your living room watching
  • 00:23:13.021 --> 00:23:13.922
  • In your living room watching this with your spouse,
  • 00:23:13.989 --> 00:23:15.991
  • This with your spouse, or someone that you love.
  • 00:23:16.057 --> 00:23:17.492
  • Or someone that you love. the truth is,
  • 00:23:17.559 --> 00:23:18.326
  • The truth is, relationships are
  • 00:23:18.393 --> 00:23:19.628
  • Relationships are challenging by design,
  • 00:23:19.694 --> 00:23:21.163
  • Challenging by design, it's how god grows us.
  • 00:23:21.229 --> 00:23:22.464
  • It's how god grows us. >> right.
  • 00:23:22.531 --> 00:23:22.798
  • >> right. >> but, it's his intention
  • 00:23:22.864 --> 00:23:24.633
  • >> but, it's his intention for you to do more than just
  • 00:23:24.699 --> 00:23:25.834
  • For you to do more than just survive your relationships.
  • 00:23:25.901 --> 00:23:27.769
  • Survive your relationships. i believe he wants you
  • 00:23:27.836 --> 00:23:28.770
  • I believe he wants you to thrive in them.
  • 00:23:28.837 --> 00:23:29.504
  • To thrive in them. >> yes.
  • 00:23:29.571 --> 00:23:29.938
  • >> yes. >> and his word gives us
  • 00:23:30.005 --> 00:23:31.006
  • >> and his word gives us the tools to make that possible.
  • 00:23:31.072 --> 00:23:32.641
  • The tools to make that possible. so, today, i have a special,
  • 00:23:32.707 --> 00:23:34.509
  • So, today, i have a special, most requested resource
  • 00:23:34.576 --> 00:23:36.745
  • Most requested resource that i wanna send to you,
  • 00:23:36.812 --> 00:23:37.813
  • That i wanna send to you, it's called,
  • 00:23:37.879 --> 00:23:38.947
  • It's called, "meant to be."
  • 00:23:39.014 --> 00:23:39.815
  • "meant to be." it will show you
  • 00:23:39.881 --> 00:23:40.715
  • It will show you some of the bible's best kept
  • 00:23:40.782 --> 00:23:41.950
  • Some of the bible's best kept secrets about sex, shh,
  • 00:23:42.017 --> 00:23:45.954
  • Secrets about sex, shh, marriage, and being single.
  • 00:23:46.021 --> 00:23:48.623
  • Marriage, and being single. >> it's so good,
  • 00:23:48.690 --> 00:23:49.558
  • >> it's so good, and it's really not
  • 00:23:49.624 --> 00:23:50.225
  • And it's really not just a relationship series.
  • 00:23:50.292 --> 00:23:52.294
  • Just a relationship series. this resource truly has
  • 00:23:52.360 --> 00:23:54.029
  • This resource truly has the power to impact your life.
  • 00:23:54.095 --> 00:23:55.363
  • The power to impact your life. we've heard stories of marriages
  • 00:23:55.430 --> 00:23:57.299
  • We've heard stories of marriages that were restored,
  • 00:23:57.365 --> 00:23:58.567
  • That were restored, and single people that
  • 00:23:58.633 --> 00:23:59.401
  • And single people that learned to embrace the season
  • 00:23:59.468 --> 00:24:00.802
  • Learned to embrace the season that there in instead of
  • 00:24:00.869 --> 00:24:02.437
  • That there in instead of focusing on the relationships
  • 00:24:02.504 --> 00:24:03.905
  • Focusing on the relationships that they don't have.
  • 00:24:03.972 --> 00:24:04.973
  • That they don't have. i know that this series
  • 00:24:05.040 --> 00:24:06.541
  • I know that this series is gonna help you like it
  • 00:24:06.608 --> 00:24:08.143
  • Is gonna help you like it has so many already.
  • 00:24:08.210 --> 00:24:09.878
  • Has so many already. >> and, we wanna help you,
  • 00:24:09.945 --> 00:24:10.779
  • >> and, we wanna help you, we're here to help you.
  • 00:24:10.846 --> 00:24:11.613
  • We're here to help you. >> yeah.
  • 00:24:11.680 --> 00:24:11.980
  • >> yeah. >> so, i'm gonna send you
  • 00:24:12.047 --> 00:24:12.747
  • >> so, i'm gonna send you this resource, "meant to be,"
  • 00:24:12.814 --> 00:24:14.115
  • This resource, "meant to be," with your gift of any amount
  • 00:24:14.182 --> 00:24:15.984
  • With your gift of any amount to the ministry today.
  • 00:24:16.051 --> 00:24:17.919
  • To the ministry today. just go online, right now,
  • 00:24:17.986 --> 00:24:20.155
  • Just go online, right now, or call the number
  • 00:24:20.222 --> 00:24:20.722
  • Or call the number on the screen, right now,
  • 00:24:20.789 --> 00:24:22.457
  • On the screen, right now, and request your copy of
  • 00:24:22.524 --> 00:24:23.725
  • And request your copy of "meant to be."
  • 00:24:23.792 --> 00:24:24.559
  • "meant to be." say, "i want it,"
  • 00:24:24.626 --> 00:24:25.660
  • Say, "i want it," and we'll get it out
  • 00:24:25.727 --> 00:24:26.828
  • And we'll get it out to you right away.
  • 00:24:26.895 --> 00:24:27.696
  • To you right away. here's some more info as well
  • 00:24:27.762 --> 00:24:29.097
  • Here's some more info as well as some additional resources
  • 00:24:29.164 --> 00:24:30.432
  • As some additional resources you can request today.
  • 00:24:30.499 --> 00:24:31.933
  • >> "relationship essentials"
  • 00:24:32.767 --> 00:24:33.735
  • Features two
  • 00:24:33.835 --> 00:24:34.436
  • Of pastor steven furtick's
  • 00:24:34.536 --> 00:24:35.770
  • Most requested series,
  • 00:24:35.871 --> 00:24:37.005
  • "meant to be,"
  • 00:24:37.105 --> 00:24:37.639
  • And "the other half."
  • 00:24:37.739 --> 00:24:38.607
  • "meant to be,"
  • 00:24:38.707 --> 00:24:39.608
  • Is a powerful 5-part series
  • 00:24:39.708 --> 00:24:40.876
  • Uncovering the bible's
  • 00:24:40.976 --> 00:24:41.743
  • Best-kept secrets about sex,
  • 00:24:41.843 --> 00:24:43.345
  • Marriage, and being single.
  • 00:24:43.445 --> 00:24:44.880
  • And, "the other half,"
  • 00:24:44.980 --> 00:24:45.914
  • Is a 4-part series that
  • 00:24:46.014 --> 00:24:47.115
  • Provides practical steps
  • 00:24:47.215 --> 00:24:48.450
  • To shift your focus
  • 00:24:48.550 --> 00:24:49.117
  • In relationships and prioritize
  • 00:24:49.217 --> 00:24:50.919
  • What matters most.
  • 00:24:51.019 --> 00:24:52.053
  • Together these two series
  • 00:24:52.153 --> 00:24:53.321
  • Provide the tools you need
  • 00:24:53.421 --> 00:24:54.556
  • For healthier relationships,
  • 00:24:54.656 --> 00:24:55.991
  • God's way.
  • 00:24:56.091 --> 00:24:56.758
  • "relationship essentials"
  • 00:24:56.858 --> 00:24:57.959
  • Is available for your gift
  • 00:24:58.059 --> 00:24:59.060
  • Of any amount.
  • 00:24:59.160 --> 00:24:59.995
  • Call or visit us online now
  • 00:25:00.095 --> 00:25:01.463
  • To request your copy.
  • 00:25:01.563 --> 00:25:02.297
  • >> if you love watching sermons
  • 00:25:02.931 --> 00:25:04.266
  • >> if you love watching sermons from pastor steven furtick,
  • 00:25:04.332 --> 00:25:05.700
  • From pastor steven furtick, there's more for you.
  • 00:25:05.767 --> 00:25:06.902
  • There's more for you. you can join us sundays live
  • 00:25:06.968 --> 00:25:08.870
  • You can join us sundays live online where you can watch
  • 00:25:08.937 --> 00:25:10.105
  • Online where you can watch the sermon and also
  • 00:25:10.171 --> 00:25:11.373
  • The sermon and also worship with us,
  • 00:25:11.439 --> 00:25:12.407
  • Worship with us, and find a community
  • 00:25:12.474 --> 00:25:13.675
  • And find a community of believers.
  • 00:25:13.742 --> 00:25:14.442
  • Of believers. go to stevenfurtick.com/live
  • 00:25:14.509 --> 00:25:16.278
  • Go to stevenfurtick.com/live for times.
  • 00:25:16.344 --> 00:25:17.579
  • >> ♪ oh i can see a cloud ♪
  • 00:25:18.380 --> 00:25:21.216
  • ♪ heavy with rain ♪
  • 00:25:21.283 --> 00:25:23.385
  • ♪ and it looks like revival ♪
  • 00:25:23.451 --> 00:25:26.221
  • ♪ it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:25:26.288 --> 00:25:29.090
  • ♪ oh i can see a cloud ♪
  • 00:25:29.157 --> 00:25:31.493
  • ♪ heavy with rain ♪
  • 00:25:31.560 --> 00:25:33.895
  • ♪ and it looks like salvation ♪
  • 00:25:33.962 --> 00:25:35.363
  • >> ♪ salvation ♪
  • 00:25:35.430 --> 00:25:36.765
  • >> ♪ is headed our way ♪
  • 00:25:36.831 --> 00:25:38.466
  • >> ♪ i can see a cloud ♪
  • 00:25:39.167 --> 00:25:41.536
  • ♪ heavy with rain ♪
  • 00:25:41.603 --> 00:25:43.672
  • ♪ and it looks like revival ♪
  • 00:25:43.738 --> 00:25:46.575
  • ♪ it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:25:46.641 --> 00:25:49.344
  • ♪ oh i can see a cloud ♪
  • 00:25:49.411 --> 00:25:52.013
  • ♪ heavy with rain ♪
  • 00:25:52.080 --> 00:25:54.382
  • ♪ and it looks like salvation ♪
  • 00:25:54.449 --> 00:25:57.152
  • ♪ is headed our way ♪
  • 00:25:57.218 --> 00:25:59.354
  • ♪ oh i can hear a sound ♪
  • 00:25:59.421 --> 00:26:02.190
  • ♪ the abundance of rain ♪
  • 00:26:02.257 --> 00:26:04.859
  • ♪ and it sounds like freedom ♪
  • 00:26:04.926 --> 00:26:07.395
  • ♪ and it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:07.462 --> 00:26:10.065
  • ♪ oh i can hear a sound ♪
  • 00:26:10.131 --> 00:26:12.734
  • ♪ the abundance of rain ♪
  • 00:26:12.801 --> 00:26:15.337
  • ♪ and it sounds ♪
  • 00:26:15.403 --> 00:26:16.171
  • ♪ like provision ♪
  • 00:26:16.237 --> 00:26:18.206
  • ♪ is headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:18.273 --> 00:26:20.675
  • ♪ oh i can see a cloud ♪
  • 00:26:20.742 --> 00:26:23.211
  • ♪ and it's heavy with rain ♪
  • 00:26:23.278 --> 00:26:25.981
  • ♪ and it looks like healing ♪
  • 00:26:26.047 --> 00:26:28.783
  • ♪ is headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:28.850 --> 00:26:31.152
  • ♪ oh i can see a cloud ♪
  • 00:26:31.219 --> 00:26:33.722
  • ♪ and it's heavy with rain ♪
  • 00:26:33.788 --> 00:26:36.424
  • ♪ and it looks like joy ♪
  • 00:26:36.491 --> 00:26:39.127
  • ♪ and it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:39.194 --> 00:26:41.730
  • ♪ yes it's headed ♪
  • 00:26:41.796 --> 00:26:42.597
  • ♪ our way ♪
  • 00:26:42.664 --> 00:26:43.398
  • ♪ prophesy ♪
  • 00:26:43.465 --> 00:26:44.699
  • >> ♪ it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:44.766 --> 00:26:45.834
  • >> ♪ oh it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:45.900 --> 00:26:47.302
  • >> ♪ it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:47.369 --> 00:26:48.470
  • >> ♪ it's coming
  • 00:26:48.536 --> 00:26:49.104
  • ♪ it's coming ♪
  • 00:26:49.170 --> 00:26:49.904
  • >> ♪ it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:49.971 --> 00:26:50.972
  • >> ♪ it's coming ♪
  • 00:26:51.039 --> 00:26:51.773
  • ♪ it's coming ♪
  • 00:26:51.840 --> 00:26:52.607
  • >> ♪ it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:52.674 --> 00:26:53.642
  • >> ♪ oh it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:53.708 --> 00:26:55.210
  • >> ♪ it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:55.276 --> 00:26:56.311
  • >> ♪ oh it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:56.378 --> 00:26:57.779
  • >> ♪ it's headed our way ♪
  • 00:26:57.846 --> 00:26:59.047
  • ♪ ♪
  • 00:27:03.218 --> 00:27:03.718
  • >> ♪ so darkness ♪
  • 00:27:04.419 --> 00:27:05.186
  • ♪ bow down to the day ♪
  • 00:27:05.253 --> 00:27:07.222
  • >> ♪ mountains get up ♪
  • 00:27:07.288 --> 00:27:08.590
  • ♪ out my way ♪
  • 00:27:08.657 --> 00:27:09.791
  • ♪ breaking out of yesterday ♪
  • 00:27:09.858 --> 00:27:11.793
  • >> ♪ i got a new thing ♪
  • 00:27:11.860 --> 00:27:12.761
  • >> ♪ i got a new thing coming ♪
  • 00:27:12.827 --> 00:27:14.763
  • >> ♪ so tell this giant ♪
  • 00:27:14.829 --> 00:27:16.431
  • ♪ in my face ♪
  • 00:27:16.498 --> 00:27:17.699
  • ♪ you're not greater ♪
  • 00:27:17.766 --> 00:27:19.034
  • >> ♪ than my faith ♪
  • 00:27:19.100 --> 00:27:20.335
  • ♪ best believe me ♪
  • 00:27:20.402 --> 00:27:21.803
  • ♪ when i say ♪
  • 00:27:21.870 --> 00:27:23.471
  • ♪ i got a new thing coming ♪
  • 00:27:23.538 --> 00:27:24.973
  • >> ♪ i got a new thing ♪
  • 00:27:25.040 --> 00:27:26.041
  • >> ♪ i got a new thing coming ♪
  • 00:27:26.107 --> 00:27:27.342
  • >> ♪ i got a new thing ♪
  • 00:27:27.409 --> 00:27:28.410
  • >> ♪ i got a new thing coming ♪
  • 00:27:28.476 --> 00:27:29.010